| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | Kids, breakfast! | 孩子们 吃早饭了 |
| [00:05] | Kids? | 孩子们 |
| [00:07] | Phil, would you get them? | 菲尔 把他们叫下来好吗 |
| [00:08] | Yeah. Just a sec. | 好 等一下 |
| [00:10] | Kids! | 孩子们 |
| [00:13] | – That is – Okay. | -这真是 -算了 |
| [00:16] | Kids? Get down here! | 孩子们 快下来 |
| [00:18] | Why are you guys yelling at us when we’re way upstairs? | 我们远在楼上 你们喊也没用 |
| [00:22] | – Just text me. – All right. That’s not gonna happen. | -发个短信不就行了 -那是不可能的 |
| [00:24] | And, wow! You’re not wearing that outfit. | 你不能穿这套衣服出门 |
| [00:26] | What’s wrong with it? | 这衣服怎么了 |
| [00:27] | Honey, do you have anything to say | 亲爱的 对你女儿这条裙子 |
| [00:28] | – to your daughter about her skirt? – Sorry. | -有什么意见吗 -不好意思 |
| [00:31] | – Oh, yeah. That looks really cute, sweetheart. – Thanks. | -挺可爱的嘛 宝贝 -谢了 |
| [00:34] | No. It’s way too short. | 不行 这裙子太短了 |
| [00:35] | People know you’re a girl. | 大家知道你是女生 |
| [00:36] | You don’t need to prove it to them. | 没必要穿这么少给他们看 |
| [00:38] | Luke got his head stuck in the banister again. | 卢克又把头卡在栏杆里了 |
| [00:40] | I got it. Where’s the baby oil? | 我去吧 婴儿油在哪儿 |
| [00:43] | It’s on our bedside tab- I don’t know. Find it. | 在我们床头的 我不知道 你自己找 |
| [00:48] | Come on! | 拜托 |
| [00:49] | I was out of control growing up. | 我在成长期间简直无法无天 |
| [00:52] | There, you know? I said it. | 你看 我坦白了 |
| [00:54] | I-I just don’t want my kids… | 我只是不想让我的孩子 |
| [00:57] | to make the same bad mistakes I made. | 重蹈我的覆辙 |
| [00:59] | I-If Haley never wakes up on a beach in Florida, half-naked, | 只要海莉没有半裸着在佛罗里达沙滩上醒来 |
| [01:03] | I’ve done my job. | 我就算完成我的任务了 |
| [01:05] | – Our job. – Right. | -我俩的任务 -对 |
| [01:08] | I’ve done our job. | 我就算完成了我俩的任务 |
| [01:10] | Vamos, Manny! Kick it! Kick it! | 加油 曼尼 踢球啊 踢啊 |
| [01:12] | Don’t let him- Kick it! | 别让他 踢啊 |
| [01:14] | Manny, go! A la derecha! A la derecha! | 曼尼 加油 往右跑 往右 |
| [01:17] | No! No, no. | 不 不 不要啊 |
| [01:20] | He tripped him, Jay. Where’s the penalty? | 他下绊子 杰 怎么没人吹犯规 |
| [01:22] | Gloria, they’re 0 and 6. | 歌洛莉亚 他们已经落后了6个球 |
| [01:24] | Let’s take it down a notch. | 你小点声叫喊 |
| [01:26] | We’re very different. | 我们是不同世界的人 |
| [01:28] | Jay’s from the city. | 杰来自城市 |
| [01:29] | He has a big business. | 他的生意做得很大 |
| [01:32] | I come from a small village. | 我来自一个小山村 |
| [01:34] | Very poor but very, very beautiful. | 穷困潦倒 但风景怡人 |
| [01:37] | It’s the number one village in all Colombia for all the- | 我们村拥有全哥伦比亚最多的 |
| [01:41] | What’s the word? | 那个词怎么说来着 |
| [01:42] | Murders. | 凶杀案 |
| [01:43] | Yes. The murders. | 没错 凶杀案 |
| [01:45] | Manny, stop him! | 曼尼 拦住他 |
| [01:47] | Stop him! You can do it! | 拦住他 你可以的 |
| [01:53] | Damn it, Manny! | 你真烂 曼尼 |
| [01:55] | Come on, coach. You gotta take that kid out. | 教练 该让那孩子下场了 |
| [01:58] | You wanna take him out? How about I take you out? | 你想让他下场吗 不如我让你”下场”如何 |
| [02:01] | – Honey, honey. – Why don’t you worry about your son? | -亲爱的 -你还是操心你的儿子吧 |
| [02:04] | He spent the first half with his hand in his pants! | 他整个上半场光忙着抓裤裆了 |
| [02:10] | I’ve wanted to tell her off for the last six weeks. | 那话我6周来一直想对她说来着 |
| [02:14] | I’m Josh. Ryan’s dad. | 我叫乔希 莱恩的爸爸 |
| [02:16] | Hi, I’m Gloria Pritchett. Manny’s mother. | 我叫歌洛莉亚·普里契特 曼尼的妈妈 |
| [02:19] | – Oh, and this must be your dad. – Her dad? | -这位是你父亲吧 -她父亲? |
| [02:21] | – Yeah. – No, no. That’s funny. | -是啊 -不 不是 真搞笑 |
| [02:22] | Actually, no, I’m her husband. | 怎么可能 我是她老公 |
| [02:24] | Don’t be fooled by the, uh- | 别被外表给骗了 |
| [02:26] | Give me a second here. | 稍等片刻 |
| [02:30] | Who is a good girl? Who’s that? | 谁是乖宝宝啊 是谁啊 |
| [02:33] | Who’s that? | 是谁啊 |
| [02:34] | – Oh, she’s adorable. – Oh, thank you. | -她真可爱 -谢谢 |
| [02:37] | Hi, precious. Hello. | 你好 小公主 |
| [02:42] | Uh, we just, uh- We just adopted her from Vietnam. | 我们刚从越南领养了她 |
| [02:44] | And we’re bringing her home for the first time, huh? | 这是我们第一次带她回家 |
| [02:47] | She’s an angel. You and your wife must be thrilled. | 她像个小天使 你们夫妻俩一定很激动 |
| [02:50] | Sorry, sorry, sorry. Daddy needed snacks. | 抱歉 我来晚了 老爹去买点心了 |
| [02:57] | So, what are we talking about? | 大家在聊什么呢 |
| [03:00] | Uh, we have been together for- guh, five- five years now? | 我们在一起已经…5年了吧? |
| [03:05] | And, uh, we just- we decided we really wanted to have a baby. | 我们非常想要一个孩子 |
| [03:08] | So, we had initially asked one of our | 一开始 我们想找一个 |
| [03:10] | lesbian friends to be a surrogate, but- | 女同性恋朋友做代孕母亲 |
| [03:12] | Then we figured, they’re already mean enough. | 后来又想 她们平时就够刻薄了 |
| [03:14] | Can you imagine one of ’em pregnant? Pregnant, no. | 你能想象她们怀孕后会如何变本加厉吗 |
| [03:16] | No, thank you. Ick. | 还是算了吧 想想就怕 |
| [03:18] | You saw that, right? Everybody fawning over Lily, | 你看到没 大家本来在逗莉莉玩 |
| [03:21] | and then you walk on and suddenly it’s all, | 你一走进来 他们就装作 |
| [03:22] | “Ooh, SkyMall. | 看机上购物杂志 |
| [03:23] | I gotta buy a motorized tie rack.” | 考虑买个电动领带架什么的 |
| [03:26] | All right, you know, I’m gonna give the speech. | 我得教育一下这帮人 |
| [03:27] | You are not giving the speech. | 千万别这么做 |
| [03:29] | You’re gonna be stuck with these people for the next five hours. | 你还得和他们一起呆上5小时呢 |
| [03:31] | You’re right, you’re right. Okay. I’m sorry. | 好吧 你说得对 我错了 |
| [03:33] | – Look at that baby with those cream puffs. – Okay. Excuse me. | -你看那个拿着泡芙的宝宝 -好吧 够了 |
| [03:37] | Excuse me. | 不好意思 |
| [03:37] | This baby would have grown up in a crowded orphanage | 这宝宝原本可能会在人满为患的孤儿院里成长 |
| [03:39] | if it wasn’t for us “Cream puffs.” | 多亏我们这些娘娘腔收养呢 |
| [03:41] | – And you know what? Note to all of you who judge- – Mitchell! | -你们这些搞歧视的人 -米奇尔 |
| [03:43] | Hear this. Love knows no race, creed- | 给我听好了 爱不分种族 信仰 |
| [03:47] | Or gender. | 不分性别 |
| [03:47] | – And shame on you, – Mitchell. | -我为你们感到羞耻 -米奇尔 |
| [03:49] | – you small-minded, ignorant few – Mitchell! | -你们这些狭隘愚昧的 -米奇尔 |
| [03:51] | – What? -She’s got the cream puffs. | -干嘛 -人家说的是泡芙 |
| [04:01] | We would like to pay for everyone’s headsets. | 各位的耳机费我们请了 |
| [04:17] | Buddy. Why do you keep getting stuck like this? | 兄弟 你怎么老是卡在这里面 |
| [04:20] | I thought I could get out this time. | 我以为这次能拔出来呢 |
| [04:21] | I’m just gonna say it. He needs to be checked by a specialist. | 我直说了吧 他得去检查一下智商 |
| [04:26] | There. Be free. | 好了 你自由了 |
| [04:28] | Excalibur. | 亚瑟王之剑拔出来了 |
| [04:30] | – I’m having a friend over today. – Who? | -今天我有朋友来家里玩 -谁啊 |
| [04:32] | – Uh, you don’t know him. – Him? Him? | -你不认识他 -是个男生吗 |
| [04:36] | Ooh, a boy. You gonna kiss him? | 哇 男生 你会和他亲嘴吗 |
| [04:39] | – Shut up. – Easy. Easy. | -闭嘴 -别激动 别激动 |
| [04:41] | – Yeah, shut up! – No, you shut up! | -闭嘴 -你才闭嘴 |
| [04:42] | Luke, Alex, why don’t you take it outside, okay? | 卢克和艾丽克斯 你们俩出去解决好吗 |
| [04:44] | And do what? | 怎么解决 |
| [04:45] | – Fight in the sun. It’ll be a nice change. – Haley. | -在太阳下决斗 不错吧 -海莉 |
| [04:48] | – I’m kidding. – Who’s the boy? | -我逗你们玩呢 -是谁要来 |
| [04:50] | His name is Dylan. | 他叫迪兰 |
| [04:51] | I might as well tell him not to come… | 我还是别让他来算了 |
| [04:53] | Because you guys are just going to embarrass me again. | 不然你们又得让我丢脸 |
| [04:55] | Sweetie, hang on a second. | 亲爱的 等等 |
| [04:57] | You’re 15, and it’s the first time you’ve had a boy over. | 你15岁了 还是第一次有男生来家里 |
| [05:00] | I’m bound to be a little surprised, | 我是有点小吃惊 |
| [05:02] | but I’m not gonna embarrass you. | 可我不会让你丢脸的 |
| [05:04] | I better charge the camcorder. | 我去给摄像机充好电 |
| [05:06] | I’m kidding. Come on. Who are you talking to? | 逗你玩呢 别这样 也不看看我是谁 |
| [05:10] | I’m the cool dad. That’s- That’s my thing. | 我是酷老爹 这是我的风格 |
| [05:13] | I’m hip. I- I surf the Web. | 我酷毙了 我会上网 |
| [05:15] | I text. “LOL”- Laugh out loud. | 我会发短信 LOL意思是癫狂笑 |
| [05:17] | “OMG”- Oh, my God. | OMG意思是饿滴神 |
| [05:19] | “WTF”- Why the face? | WTF意思是苦逼脸 |
| [05:21] | Um, you know, I know all the dances to High School Musical, so- | 《歌舞青春》里所有的舞我都会跳 |
| [05:25] | *We’re all in this together * | *我们现在欢聚一堂* |
| [05:28] | *Yes, we are* | *没错* |
| [05:30] | *We’re all stars Something, something you know it* | *我们都是大明星 嘻唰唰嘻唰唰* |
| [05:34] | – Mom! Dad! – What happened? | -妈妈 爸爸 -什么事 |
| [05:36] | – Luke just shot me! – I didn’t mean to. | -卢克用枪射我 -我不是故意的 |
| [05:40] | – Are you okay? – No. | -你没事吧 -没事才怪 |
| [05:42] | The little bitch shot me. | 这小贱人用枪射我 |
| [05:43] | – Language! They’re only plastic BBs. It was an accident. | -别说脏话 -只是塑料枪 这是意外 |
| [05:48] | What did I tell you would happen if you got him a gun? | 早就告诉你 给他枪就会出事 |
| [05:50] | – Deal with this. – Buddy, uncool. | -你看着办吧 -老弟 是你不对哦 |
| [05:55] | That’s it? That’s- No, no, no, no. | 这就完了吗 不行 不行 |
| [05:58] | The agreement was that if he shoots someone, you shoot him. | 我们说好他用枪射了别人 你就得射他的 |
| [06:02] | – We were serious about that? – Yes, we were. | -我们当时是认真的吗 -当然是真的 |
| [06:04] | And now you have to follow through. | 所以你现在要按说好的执行 |
| [06:07] | – I’m so sorry. – Liar. | -我错了 -你就装吧 |
| [06:11] | – Go. – He’s got a birthday party. | -去吧 -他还要去参加生日会呢 |
| [06:13] | What’s more important here, Dad? | 生日会和家法哪个更重要 爸爸 |
| [06:14] | You can shoot him afterwards. He’ll be home at 2:00. | 你可以之后再射他 他两点就能到家 |
| [06:16] | I can’t shoot him at 2:00. | 两点不行 |
| [06:17] | I’m showing a house at 2:00. | 我两点还得带人去看房子 |
| [06:18] | – What about 3:00? – No, he’s got a soccer game at 3:00. | -三点吧 -不行 三点他有足球赛 |
| [06:21] | And then- Oh, we gotta leave for that dinner thing at 5:00. | 然后我们五点就得去赴宴 |
| [06:24] | 4:15. You could shoot him at 4:15. | 4点15吧 你可以在那时候射他 |
| [06:26] | Yeah, I guess that works for me. Oh! | 行 那个时候我有空 |
| [06:29] | – “Shoot Luke.” – Sorry, dude. It’s on the calendar. | -射卢克 -抱歉老弟 铁板钉钉了 |
| [06:32] | Oh, come on! | 别这样啊 |
| [06:35] | I’m quitting soccer. It is a game for children. | 我不想踢足球了 那是小孩儿玩的 |
| [06:38] | No, you’re not quitting. | 不 你不能放弃 |
| [06:39] | You would have stopped that goal | 对方之所以会进球 |
| [06:41] | if you weren’t staring at that little girl. | 完全是因为你光顾着看小姑娘了 |
| [06:43] | She is not a girl. She’s a woman. | 她不是小姑娘 她是成熟的女人 |
| [06:48] | You know, Gloria, that little blowup with that other mom | 歌洛莉亚 你犯得着非要和 |
| [06:51] | Why do you have to do things like that? | 那个妈妈吵架吗 |
| [06:52] | If somebody says something about my family, | 如果有人敢对我的家人说三道四 |
| [06:53] | – I’m going to – I’m just saying. | -我一定 -我只是说 |
| [06:55] | You could take it down here a little bit. That’s all. | 你火气应该小一点 就这样 |
| [06:57] | Oh, yeah. ‘Cause that’s where you live, down here. | 没错 你总是这么忍气吞声的 |
| [06:59] | – But I live up here! – Yeah, but, | -可我咽不下这口气 -可是 |
| [07:00] | you don’t have to be so emotional all the time.That’s all I’m saying. | 我只是说 你别那么容易激动嘛 |
| [07:03] | Manny, you’re with me on this, right? | 曼尼 你也这么觉得吧 |
| [07:05] | I wanna tell Brenda Feldman I love her. | 我要告诉布兰达·费德曼我爱她 |
| [07:07] | – Oh, for God sakes. – Manny, she’s 16. | -天啊 -曼尼 她都16岁了 |
| [07:09] | Oh. It’s okay for you to take an older lover? | 你不就找了年长的对象吗 |
| [07:11] | – Hey, watch it. – I wanna go to the mall where she works. | -嘿 说话注意点 -我要去她上班的商场 |
| [07:14] | But first I need to get my white shirt, the silk one. | 不过我先得换上我的白衬衫 丝绸的那件 |
| [07:18] | Okay. If that’s what you really want to do. | 好吧 如果你真想这么做的话 |
| [07:20] | Seriously. Not to be the evil stepdad, | 说真的 不是我要当恶毒的后爹 |
| [07:21] | but if you put on a puffy white shirt… | 可你要真穿着那臃肿的白衬衣 |
| [07:23] | and declare your love for a 16-year-old, | 去向16岁的姑娘告白 |
| [07:25] | you’re gonna be swinging from the flagpole | 你会被扒得只剩条白内裤 |
| [07:27] | in your puffy white underpants. | 然后被吊在旗杆上 |
| [07:29] | – Stop the car. – Oh, where are you going? | -停车 -你去哪儿 |
| [07:35] | See? You hurt his feelings. | 看到没 你伤他的心了 |
| [07:37] | Ah- Well, if it toughens him up a little bit then- | 要是这能让他变得坚强点 |
| [07:40] | Oh, geez. He’s picking flowers. | 我的妈呀 他居然去采野花了 |
| [07:43] | Manny’s very passionate, just like his father. | 曼尼是个多情种 和他爹一个样 |
| [07:46] | My first husband- he’s very handsome, but too crazy. | 我的前夫 风度翩翩 但太疯狂了 |
| [07:50] | It seemed like all we did was fight and make love, | 我们不是在吵架就是在做爱 |
| [07:52] | fight and make love, fight and make love. | 吵架 做爱 吵架 做爱 |
| [07:55] | One time, I’m not kidding you, we fell out the window together. | 说真的 有一次 我们从窗口摔下去了 |
| [07:59] | Which- Which one were you doing? | 你们当时在吵架还是做爱 |
| [08:02] | I’m hearing this for the first time. | 我也是第一次听说这事 |
| [08:06] | This doesn’t worry you? | 你不担心吗 |
| [08:08] | She barely slept on the plane and she’s still wide awake. | 她在飞机上就没怎么睡 现在还很清醒 |
| [08:10] | – Oh, stop worrying. – I can’t. | -别想多了 -不想才怪 |
| [08:13] | That- That orphanage was all women. | 那个孤儿院里都是女人 |
| [08:15] | Maybe she just- she can’t fall asleep unless she feels a woman’s shape. | 也许离开女性柔软的怀抱 她就睡不着 |
| [08:18] | – I guess that’s possible. – So here. | -有可能 -那你抱着她 |
| [08:22] | What the hell is that supposed to mean? | 你这话是什么意思 |
| [08:23] | Yes, | 没错 |
| [08:24] | I’ve gained a few extra pounds while we were expecting the baby, | 在等待领养孩子的期间 我是长胖了一点 |
| [08:28] | which has been very difficult. | 过程相当艰辛 |
| [08:30] | But apparently your body | 但显然你的身体会 |
| [08:31] | does a nesting, very maternal, primal thing… | 产生一些母性的本能反应 |
| [08:34] | where it retains nutrients- | 来储存养分 |
| [08:36] | some sort of molecular physiology thing. | 像是分子生理学那类的 |
| [08:38] | But that’s science. | 那是科学事实 |
| [08:40] | You can’t- You can’t fight it, so- | 人类 根本无力抵抗 |
| [08:47] | – I’m not saying anything. – You’re saying everything. | -我没别的意思 -你就是话里有话 |
| [08:51] | – Count to three. – One, two- | -数到3 -1 2 |
| [08:53] | – Three. – Okay. | -3 -好吧 |
| [08:55] | – Oh, Cam. This is beautiful. – Oh, my God. Do you love it? | -小卡 真美 -我的天 你喜欢吗 |
| [08:58] | Yes, I- | 当然 我 |
| [09:00] | What the hell is that? | 这是什么玩意 |
| [09:01] | I had Andre do it while we were gone. | 我让安珠尔趁我们不在时画的 |
| [09:03] | Is that us, with wings? | 那是我俩吗 还长着翅膀 |
| [09:06] | We’re floating above her, always there to protect her. | 我们在她的上方 永远守护着她 |
| [09:08] | Okay. Well, that’s reassuring, right, Lily? | 这真让人心安 对吧 莉莉 |
| [09:10] | Yes, we tore you away from everything you know, | 我们把你从熟悉的环境中抢出来 |
| [09:12] | but don’t worry, things are normal here. | 可别担心 新环境一切”正常” |
| [09:13] | Your fathers are floating fairies. | 你的大爸二爸可是飞天小精灵哦 |
| [09:15] | No, can you call Andre, | 不行 你能叫安珠尔 |
| [09:16] | have him paint something a little less gay? | 重新画点不那么基情的东西吗 |
| [09:19] | By the way, we need to stop having friends | 另外 我们也该少和安珠尔往来 |
| [09:20] | with names like Andre. | 他名字也太娘了 |
| [09:22] | – Redheaded dad is angry daddy. – No, I’m not. | -红发老爹怒火旺盛 -我才不是 |
| [09:24] | Yes, you are. | 你就是 |
| [09:26] | Even Pepper pointed it out on the way home from the airport. | 回来的路上 连胡娇都看出来了 |
| [09:28] | Okay, that’s another one- Pepper. | 你看 又一个娘气的名字 胡娇 |
| [09:29] | Okay, what’s up? | 你到底怎么不爽 |
| [09:32] | All right, look. I- | 好吧 听着 |
| [09:35] | I- I never told my family we were adopting a baby. | 我还没有告诉家里领养孩子的事 |
| [09:39] | – And… – I know. | -而且 -我知道 |
| [09:41] | – You do? – Yeah, and I don’t blame you. I know your family. | -你知道 -我不怪你 我了解你家人 |
| [09:45] | You’d tell ’em. They’d say something judgmental. | 你一告诉他们 他们就开始说三道四 |
| [09:47] | – Exactly. – You’d get mad. | -就是这样 -然后你就会生气 |
| [09:49] | I know. And then something that’s supposed to be nothing but joyful | 没错 当爹本该是一件喜事 |
| [09:51] | suddenly turns into this huge fight. | 转眼就变成一团混战 |
| [09:53] | And who wants a big, emotional scene like that? | 谁愿意让事情变得一团糟呢 |
| [09:55] | Thank you. Thank you. | 谢谢 谢谢 |
| [09:56] | I’m so- I’m so relieved you understand. | 你能理解我 真是让我松了一口气 |
| [09:59] | I invited them over for dinner tonight. | 所以我邀请了他们今晚来吃饭 |
| [10:02] | – What? – I had to. | -什么 -我也是不得已 |
| [10:04] | This would have gone on forever. You’re an avoider. | 这样下去没完没了 你就只会逃避 |
| [10:06] | No. No. No. Cam, I’m calling them right now and canceling. | 不 小卡 我现在就打电话取消这件事 |
| [10:09] | No, you’re not. | 不准打 |
| [10:10] | You’re telling your family you adopted a baby, tonight. | 今晚你得把领养的事告诉全家人 |
| [10:13] | And you do have avoidance issues. Even Longinus said so. | 你就是喜欢逃避 连朗吉娜都这么说 |
| [10:16] | Are- Are you really not hearing these names? | 你自己听听 这些名字有多娘 |
| [10:23] | Don’t answer it! I’ll get it! | 你们别管了 我来开门 |
| [10:32] | Hi. Hey, you must be Dylan. | 你好 你一定是迪兰吧 |
| [10:34] | – Hey. Dylan. Yeah. – I’m Haley’s mother. | -是的 迪兰 -我是海莉的妈妈 |
| [10:38] | – Come on. Let’s go. – Okay. Um- | -我们走吧 -那个 |
| [10:40] | Hang on one second. | 等一下 |
| [10:43] | Dylan, you’re still in high school? | 迪兰 你还在念高中吗 |
| [10:46] | – Yeah, I’m a senior. -A senior. Okay. Cool. | -是 我高三了 -高三 很好 |
| [10:49] | Hey, Phil. Sweetie. Honey. He is Dylan, and he is a senior. | 菲尔 亲爱的 这是迪兰 他读高三 |
| [10:54] | You have to scare him. | 你得给他个下马威 |
| [10:56] | Let me meet this “Playa.” | 让我瞧瞧这个花心大少 |
| [10:59] | Phil Dunphy, yo. | 在下菲尔·邓菲 |
| [11:06] | It’s like that. You just- You just stare down at ’em, | 就是这样 你只需死盯着他们看 |
| [11:08] | let the eyes do the work. | 用眼神中的杀气震住他们 |
| [11:10] | Your mouth might be saying, “Hey, we cool,” | 你嘴上说着 没问题 |
| [11:12] | but your eyes are like, “No, we not.” | 可你的眼神说 才怪 |
| [11:14] | “Nice to meet you.” “No, it’s not.” | 很高兴见到你 才怪 |
| [11:18] | “It’s all good.” | 挺不错嘛 |
| [11:19] | “No, it’s not.” | 才怪 |
| [11:25] | – Okay, I see you two guys- – Wait, wait, wait. | -我看你俩已经 -等一下 |
| [11:27] | You two- | 你们俩 |
| [11:31] | You two keep it real, know what I mean, son? | 你俩要坦诚相待 懂吗 小子 |
| [11:34] | Not really. | 不太懂 |
| [11:36] | – Please, stop. – That’s cool. | -求求你 别说了 -没事 |
| [11:39] | – Ow. Oh, God! That’s my back. – Oh, honey. Sweetheart. | -妈呀我的背 -亲爱的 |
| [11:41] | Ow! Oh! I slipped in the baby oil. | 我被婴儿油滑倒了 |
| [11:44] | “Oh, where you from originally?” | 你哪儿冒出来的啊 |
| [11:47] | “I could defeat you if it came to a physical confrontation.” | 单挑的话 我轻而易举就能放倒你 |
| [11:50] | I don’t know about this. Should I call a doctor? | 我不知道该怎么办 要打电话叫医生吗 |
| [11:53] | No, no, no, no, no. Okay. | 不用不用 好了 |
| [11:56] | – You’re very strong, homes. – Thanks. | -小样儿挺强壮的啊 -谢谢夸奖 |
| [11:58] | – Okay. Nice- Nice soft landing. – There you go. | -好 轻轻放下我 -好了 |
| [12:01] | – Okay, let’s go. Come on. – I am on my side though. | -行了我们走吧 -我还侧躺着 |
| [12:04] | So just flip me right back, and we’re good. | 现在只需把我放平 就没事了 |
| [12:06] | We’ll be good. | 就没事了 |
| [12:08] | I just need to get flipped right on my back, | 只需要把我翻过来就行 |
| [12:10] | and we should be fine. So- | 就没事了 |
| [12:17] | Brenda Feldman. | 布兰达·费尔曼 |
| [12:20] | – What is that? – A poem I have written for Brenda Feldman. | -你拿的什么 -我为布兰达·费尔曼写的诗 |
| [12:23] | Of course it is. | 不用想也知道 |
| [12:24] | I put my thoughts into words and now my words into action. | 我将心事化为文字 将文字用于行动 |
| [12:27] | Hey, I’ll give you 50 bucks not to do this. | 你取消行动的话 我就给你50块钱 |
| [12:30] | I’m 11 years old. What am I gonna do with money? | 我才11岁而已 要那么多钱干什么 |
| [12:32] | What are you gonna do with a 16-year-old? | 你这年纪要16岁的花姑娘又能干什么 |
| [12:35] | – He’s like a bullfighter. – Mmm. You ever see a bullfight? | -他就像个斗牛士 -你见过斗牛吗 |
| [12:40] | I can’t watch this. – You’re in such a bad mood. | 我看不下去了 -我知道你心情不好 |
| [12:42] | And I know why. It’s because that man thought you were my father. | 我也知道原因 因为那人以为你是我爸爸 |
| [12:46] | – No. – Yes. | -不是的 -就是 |
| [12:47] | – No. – When you say “No” like that, it’s always “Yes.” | -不是 -你这样否认时 就代表是 |
| [12:51] | Come on. We’re in the mall. | 别这样 我们都到商场了 |
| [12:52] | Let’s get you, like, some younger clothes. | 给你买点年轻的衣服吧 |
| [12:54] | – There’s a store there. – I don’t need any younger clothes. | -那边有家店 -我不需要年轻的衣服 |
| [12:57] | And I don’t care what some jackass | 我也不在乎那些 |
| [12:59] | in a pair of ripped jeans thinks about me. | 穿着破牛仔裤的混蛋如何看我 |
| [13:01] | Good. You shouldn’t. | 没错 你不用在乎他们 |
| [13:03] | You should only care what I think. | 你只要在乎我的想法就行了 |
| [13:05] | I love you, and I don’t care how old you are. | 我爱你 我不在意你的年纪 |
| [13:07] | So stop being a gloomy goose and stop being so hard on Manny. | 所以别郁闷了 对曼尼也别那么凶 |
| [13:11] | The only reason I’m hard on Manny… | 我对曼尼严格只是因为 |
| [13:13] | Is just because I don’t wanna see him make a fool of himself. | 我不想让他出洋相 |
| [13:16] | And I can smell that hair goo of his from here. | 我从这儿都能闻到他的发胶味了 |
| [13:19] | Look, I don’t know what’s gonna happen to him over there. | 我不知道他那里会发生什么 |
| [13:21] | But you’re his family now, and that means only one thing- | 可你是他的家人 这就意味着 |
| [13:26] | You be the wind in his back, not the spit in his face. | 你只可背后送春风 不可当面唾其脸 |
| [13:30] | – What? -It’s something my mom always says. | -啥玩意 -这是我妈常挂嘴边的话 |
| [13:33] | It’s gorgeous in Spanish. | 用西班牙语说很华丽的 |
| [13:36] | Look, he’s there. | 瞧 他来了 |
| [13:41] | – She has a boyfriend. – Oh, I’m sorry, mi nino. | -她名花有主了 -真遗憾 小宝贝 |
| [13:45] | I gave her my heart, | 我把心献给了她 |
| [13:47] | she gave me a picture of me as an old-time sheriff. | 她却还了一幅把我画成老式警长的图 |
| [13:53] | – That was pretty stupid of me, wasn’t it? – No, mi amor. | -我真傻是吧 -才不是呢小宝贝 |
| [13:56] | It was brave. Right, Jay? Brave. | 你是勇气可嘉 对吧 杰 勇气可嘉 |
| [13:59] | W-Well, you’ll know better next time. | 下次你就会进步了 |
| [14:01] | Come on. Let’s get a pretzel. | 来 我们买椒盐卷去 |
| [14:05] | Mentira. A me se me gusta. | 没事 我挺喜欢这画的 |
| [14:11] | Uh, excuse me, sir. | 先生 不好意思 |
| [14:12] | We ask that all mall-walkers stay to the right. | 在商场散步锻炼的人必须靠右边走 |
| [14:29] | Alex, get out! Mom! | 艾丽克斯 出去 妈妈你看她 |
| [14:31] | Alex, leave your sister alone. | 艾丽克斯 别去烦你姐姐 |
| [14:33] | I was just getting my book. Gosh. | 我只是进去拿我的书而已 至于吗 |
| [14:35] | I know, sweetie. But you need to respect their privacy. | 我知道 亲爱的 可你要尊重个人隐私 |
| [14:39] | – What are they doing up there? – Nothing. | -他们在楼上干嘛呢 -没干嘛 |
| [14:41] | Lying on her bed, watching a movie. | 躺在她床上并肩看电影 |
| [14:44] | Okay. Okay. | 很好 很好 |
| [14:47] | Um, I’m making a cake for tonight. | 我在为今晚的聚餐准备蛋糕 |
| [14:49] | You wanna help me with the frosting? | 你想帮我做糖霜吗 |
| [14:51] | Sure. | 好啊 |
| [14:54] | So, you know, if Haley got pregnant, | 要是海莉怀孕了 |
| [14:56] | would you ever pretend she has mono for a few months, | 你会假装她得了腮腺炎 请假在家 |
| [14:58] | and then, like, tell everyone the baby’s yours? | 然后告诉别人那孩子是你的吗 |
| [15:01] | – What? – This senior at school was “Out sick” for four months, | -什么 -有个高中生请了4个月病假 |
| [15:04] | but Jenna Resnick swears she saw her breast-feeding | 可吉娜·瑞斯尼克发誓说看到她 |
| [15:07] | at a coin-op car wash. | 在自助洗车站给孩子喂奶 |
| [15:14] | Buddy, what are you wearing? | 老弟 你穿了多少衣服啊 |
| [15:17] | – Nothing. – Uh-uh. No jacket. | -没穿多少 -把外套脱了 |
| [15:19] | One hat. | 只能戴一顶帽子 |
| [15:21] | How many pairs of underwear do you have on? | 你穿了几条内裤啊 |
| [15:23] | One. | 就1条 |
| [15:25] | Six. | 是6条 |
| [15:27] | First of all, it would be really cool to see Haley that fat. | 首先 看海莉怀孕变胖还蛮爽的 |
| [15:30] | And how awesome would it be | 更酷的是 |
| [15:31] | to have a fake little brother who’s really my nephew. | 多了个假弟弟 实际上是我亲外甥 |
| [15:34] | Haley is not getting pregnant. | 海莉才不会怀孕 |
| [15:37] | – Just saying “If.” – I know. | -我只是说假如 -我知道 |
| [15:38] | And I know you like to make trouble for your sister, | 我知道你喜欢找你姐的茬儿 |
| [15:41] | but it’s not gonna work this time. | 不过这次不管用了 |
| [15:42] | You know why? ‘Cause your sister’s a good girl. | 知道为啥吗 因为你姐是个好女孩 |
| [15:45] | I know. I was just like her when I was- | 我明白 因为她和我当年一模一… |
| [15:49] | I want you to know, I’m not enjoying this. | 要知道 我也不想这么做 |
| [15:52] | But this is an important lesson that you’re learning. | 可你得吸取这个教训 |
| [15:54] | So, soak it. Keep it. | 所以 记好了 记住了 |
| [16:00] | You’re too close. It’s gonna hurt. | 你站太近了 这样会很疼的 |
| [16:02] | It’s supposed to hurt. | 就是要你疼 |
| [16:04] | – And why are you smiling? – I’m- What? | -你干嘛贱贱地笑 -我笑了吗 |
| [16:19] | Oh, forget it. I can’t do this. | 算了 我下不了手 |
| [16:22] | The point is you’re scared. I think you’ve learned your lesson. | 就是要让你害怕 你已经学到教训了 |
| [16:27] | Mom! What are you doing? | 妈 你干什么啊 |
| [16:30] | Oh, hey! I was just, um, dropping off some laundry. | 我是来放洗好的衣服 |
| [16:33] | – Is this a bad time? – Yeah. | -打扰到你们了吗 -当然 |
| [16:35] | Oh. Okay. | 那我走好了 |
| [16:38] | Uh, can you shut the door, please? | 你能把门带上吗 |
| [16:40] | Actually, we’re just gonna go ahead and leave that open. | 我们还是让门开着吧 |
| [16:43] | Why? | 为啥 |
| [16:43] | Because I have, uh, seen this little show before- | 因为这种场景我见多了 |
| [16:47] | Lying on the bed with a tall senior. | 和高大的学长共卧一塌 |
| [16:50] | One minute you’re just friends, watching Falcon Crest, | 上一秒还只是一起看《鹰冠庄园》的朋友 |
| [16:52] | and the next you’re lying underneath the air hockey table | 下一秒你们就钻进游戏桌下 |
| [16:54] | with your bra in your pocket. | 宽衣解带了 |
| [16:55] | Mom! | 妈妈 |
| [16:57] | – You hit my bone! – It was an accident! | -你打到我的骨头了 -纯属意外 |
| [16:59] | – I thought you were my friend! – I am your friend. | -我以为你是我哥们呢 -我是啊 |
| [17:02] | Dad! Dad, Dad. You have got to talk to Mom. | 爸爸 你必须和妈妈谈谈 |
| [17:05] | She is, like, completely freaking out and embarrassing me! | 她简直是疯了 而且丢尽了我的脸 |
| [17:08] | Honey, your mom isn’t always as cool about things as- | 宝贝 你妈是不像你爸那么通情达理 |
| [17:10] | What is with this thing? | 这玩意怎么回事啊 |
| [17:16] | My dad. | 我爸 |
| [17:17] | Uh, my dad still isn’t completely comfortable with this. | 我爸对这事还是不太习惯 |
| [17:21] | Um- He-He still does this thing. It’s been five years now. | 已经过了5年了 他还是无法完全接受 |
| [17:24] | And he still does this thing where he announces himself… | 每次他要进入我和小卡在的房间时 |
| [17:27] | before walking into any room we’re in… | 他都会先喊一声 |
| [17:29] | just to make sure he doesn’t have to ever see us kiss. | 以防撞见我和小卡亲嘴 |
| [17:33] | Wish my mother had that system. | 要是我妈也有这个习惯就好了 |
| [17:35] | – Remember? – Not now. | -还记得吗 -以后再说 |
| [17:37] | I still can’t believe you did this to me. | 我真不敢相信你这么对我 |
| [17:39] | Would you get in the spirit of things? It’s a celebration. | 你能高兴点吗 这是个庆祝会啊 |
| [17:46] | Oh, God. | 天啊 |
| [17:47] | – Okay, I’m gonna go get Lily ready. – Okay. | -我去给莉莉打扮一下 -好 |
| [17:50] | – And I want you to just come straight out with it. – All right. | -我要你对他们实话实说 -好吧 |
| [17:53] | Okay. You can do this. | 听话 你能做到的 |
| [17:54] | Yeah. Sports guy chest bump. | 来个运动员式的撞胸 |
| [17:56] | – No. – Sports guy chest bump. | -不要 -来撞一个 |
| [17:57] | – Cam. Oh! All right. Go – Do it. | -小卡 好了 -上吧 |
| [17:59] | Sorry. | 抱歉 |
| [18:08] | – How are you? – Hi, guys. Hey. | -你好啊 -大家好啊 |
| [18:11] | That looks good. Oh, thank you. Thanks. | 看起来很美味啊 谢谢 |
| [18:13] | Don’t thank us. Open it. Dad is coming right behind. | 不用谢 打开吧 爸爸后脚马上就到 |
| [18:16] | Knock, knock! We’re here. Coming in! | 有人吗 我们要进来了 |
| [18:19] | Don’t worry, Dad. Nothing gay going on here. | 别担心爸爸 我们没在里面搞基 |
| [18:22] | May I take your multicolored coat and bejeweled cap? | 能帮你脱下这缤纷外套和闪亮小帽吗 |
| [18:25] | – Yeah. Yeah. – Hey, Jay. | -拿去吧 -杰你好啊 |
| [18:28] | – Gloria, hi. – Hi. | -你好 歌洛莉亚 -你好 |
| [18:30] | – How are you? Hi, Dad. – Hi, Gloria. How are you? | -老爸你还好吗 -歌洛莉亚 你好 |
| [18:33] | – Oh, what a beautiful dress. – Ay, thank you, Phil. | -裙子真漂亮 -谢谢你 菲尔[摸摸] |
| [18:36] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [18:38] | Oh, hey, Phil. | 菲尔 |
| [18:40] | That’s how she says “Phil.” Not “Feel.” Phil. | 她是叫你名字 不是要你去摸 |
| [18:42] | – So how was your trip? – It was good. It was good actually. | -旅行怎么样 -挺好的 真的 |
| [18:45] | But, um, about that, I- I | 关于这事 |
| [18:47] | have something that I need to tell you guys. | 我有些事要告诉你们 |
| [18:48] | Um- Uh, we didn’t just go to Vietnam for pleasure. | 我们去越南不光是为了旅游 |
| [18:52] | We, uh, kind of have some big news. | 我们有重要消息宣布 |
| [18:54] | Oh, God. If Cam comes out here with boobs, I’m leaving. | 天啊 要是小卡隆了胸 我立马走人 |
| [18:57] | – Dad. – I hope he didn’t embarrass you, Mom. | -爸爸 -我希望你的家长没让你觉得丢人 妈 |
| [18:59] | Oh, don’t mind her. Haley had her first boy over today… | 别管她 海莉今天首次带男生回家 |
| [19:03] | And Phil shot him. | 菲尔就给了他一枪 |
| [19:06] | Anyway, um, so, about- about a year ago, | 总之 一年前 |
| [19:09] | Cam and I started feeling this longing, you know, | 小卡和我开始渴望有一个 |
| [19:11] | for something more, like, uh, maybe a baby? | 有一个 孩子 |
| [19:14] | – Ooh, that’s a bad idea. – What do you mean, “Bad idea”? | -这主意很糟糕 -你说糟糕是什么意思 |
| [19:17] | Well, kids need a mother. | 孩子需要有妈妈 |
| [19:18] | I mean if you two guys are bored, get a dog. | 如果你们俩无聊了 可以养条狗 |
| [19:20] | Okay, we’re not bored, Dad. | 我们不是闲得无聊 爸 |
| [19:22] | I support you, Mitchell, even though you’re not my son. | 我支持米奇尔 尽管你不是我亲生的 |
| [19:25] | I-I-I-I think what Dad is trying to say… | 我觉得爸爸的意思是 |
| [19:27] | is that, Mitchell, you’re a little uptight. | 米奇尔 你有点紧张兮兮的 |
| [19:29] | Kids bring chaos, and- and you don’t handle it well. | 孩子就意味着麻烦 你没法处理这种事 |
| [19:33] | That’s not what Dad’s saying. | 爸爸可不是这个意思 |
| [19:34] | That’s what you’re saying. | 这是你的意思 |
| [19:35] | And it’s insulting in a whole different way. | 而且是从另一个角度羞辱了我 |
| [19:36] | Okay, people. Let’s all “Chillax.” | 好了 各位都冷静点 |
| [19:39] | – Hey, where’s Uncle Cameron? – Thank you. Thank you. | -卡梅隆舅夫呢 -多谢多谢 |
| [19:42] | Someone who’s not insulting me notices he’s not here. | 总算有人发现他不在了 而不是光羞辱我 |
| [19:45] | Oh, so that’s the big announcement, huh? | 原来你的重要消息就是这个啊 |
| [19:48] | You two broke up. | 你俩分手了吗 |
| [19:49] | Well- Well, a baby wasn’t gonna help that anyway. | 领养个孩子也挽救不了破裂的婚姻 |
| [19:52] | And let me tell you. You’re better off, | 老实说 你们分了也好 |
| [19:53] | because he was a bit of a drama queen. | 他就喜欢小题大做 |
| [19:55] | No, no, no. Stop. Stop. No. | 不是的 打住 打住 |
| [19:57] | You come into my house and you insult me and my boyfriend, | 你们到我家来 还羞辱我和我的男朋友 |
| [19:59] | who, by the way, is not that dramatic- | 而且他才没有小题大做 |
| [20:19] | We adopted a baby. | 我们领养了一个宝宝 |
| [20:20] | Her name is Lily. | 她名叫莉莉 |
| [20:23] | – Exciting! – Just turn it off. | -激动吧 -停下来 |
| [20:25] | I can’t turn it off. It’s who I am. | 我停不下来 这就是我的个性 |
| [20:28] | – The music. – Oh, yes, the music. | -我是说音乐 -关音乐啊 |
| [20:30] | Come say hi to Lily. | 来和莉莉打招呼吧 |
| [20:31] | Ay, miren a la princesita. | 看看这个小公主 |
| [20:32] | The little princess. | 真是个小公主 |
| [20:36] | – She’s so cute! – Thank you. | -她好可爱 -多谢夸奖 |
| [20:37] | Let me see her. Let me see her. | 让我看看 让我看看 |
| [20:39] | Hi there, Lily. | 你好啊 莉莉 |
| [20:42] | “Lily.” Isn’t that gonna be hard for her to say? | 莉莉 对她来说不是很难发音吗 |
| [20:45] | – Phil. – Excuse me. | -菲尔打住 -我说 |
| [20:48] | Okay, I-I-I know that I said I thought this was a bad idea. | 我知道我说了领养这个主意很糟糕 |
| [20:52] | But, uh, what do I know? | 可我又懂什么呢 |
| [20:56] | I mean, it’s not like I wrote the book on fatherhood. | 我也不是个模范父亲 |
| [20:58] | Been trying all my life to get it right. I’m still screwing up. | 一辈子都想做好爸爸 可我还是搞砸了 |
| [21:02] | – Right, Manny? – I wrote a song about it in the car. | -对吧曼尼 -我在车上为此写了首歌 |
| [21:05] | Of course you did. | 意料之中 |
| [21:08] | Anyway, I’m happy for you. | 不管怎样 我为你们感到高兴 |
| [21:10] | And, uh, you should know that, uh, | 你们要知道 |
| [21:13] | I’m not here to spit in your face, | 我不是来唾你们脸的 |
| [21:15] | I’m here to… blow at your back. | 我是来给你们 吹吹后背春风的 |
| [21:19] | – I don’t understand what that means. – I don’t- | -我不懂你的意思 -我也不懂 |
| [21:20] | Well, it’s- it’s supposed to sound better in Spanish. | 这话用西班牙语说比较好听 |
| [21:28] | Oh, that’s beautiful. That’s really nice. | 真好听 真美 |
| [21:30] | And thank you too. | 也谢谢你 |
| [21:33] | Anyhow, Mitch, uh- | 总之 米奇 |
| [21:36] | No, Dad, it’s- it’s- – | 不用了 爸爸 |
| [21:38] | – I got her. I got her. – Oh, she’s crying. | -我来抱她 -她哭了 |
| [21:40] | She wants her grandpa! She wants her daddy! | 她要爷爷抱 她要爸爸抱 |
| [21:42] | – Do you wanna meet Grandpa? – What? Are you kidding? | -想见见爷爷吗 -开什么玩笑 |
| [21:44] | She’s one of us now. Let me see the little pot sticker. | 她是自家人了 让我瞧瞧你这跟屁虫 |
| [21:48] | Hey, you’re a cutie, aren’t you? | 你真是个小可爱 对吗 |
| [21:51] | Ah. Look at this. | 看看这个 |
| [21:55] | We’re from different worlds, yet we somehow fit together. | 我们来自不同的世界 但我们彼此相容 |
| [22:00] | Love is what binds us, through fair or stormy weather. | 爱将我们紧紧相连 共度风风雨雨 |
| [22:05] | I stand before you now with only one agenda- | 我到你的前面 只有一事相许 |
| [22:09] | “To let you know my heart is yours, | 我的心只属于你 |
| [22:11] | Feldman comma Brenda.” | 布兰达·费尔曼 |
| [22:14] | I mean, seriously. | 不是吧我靠 |
| [22:18] | Luke, so far, hasn’t beaten me in basketball. | 至今为止 卢克在篮球上还没赢过我 |
| [22:22] | It’s 2-0. 2-0. Okay. Okay. | 2比0 2比0 来吧 |
| [22:27] | – Get that weak stuff out of my kitchen! – Dad, stop it! | -手下败将 滚吧 -爸爸 住手 |
| [22:30] | Can you do me a favor? Just grab- | 帮个忙好吗 站过去 |
| [22:33] | How’s the weather down there? | 篮下的滋味如何 |
| [22:34] | But when the day comes that he does win- | 等到他赢过我的那一天 |
| [22:37] | if- you know- if/when- | 如果有那么一天 |
| [22:39] | he beats me, I’m just gonna be like, | 他打败了我 我会说 |
| [22:41] | “Well done. Well done.” | 干得好 干得好 |
| [22:43] | Just, like, let him- Just support him… | 就这样支持他 |
| [22:45] | in- in- in that kind of stuff. | 就是这样 |
| [22:47] | I mean, I’d probably want to go, like, | 我可能会说 |
| [22:49] | two out of three and just see what happens there, but- | 三局两胜才算赢 再来一局什么的 |