时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:02] | Haley,hurry up! You are gonna be late. | 海莉 快点儿 你要迟到了 |
[00:04] | Alex, what are you doing? | 艾丽克斯 你在干嘛 |
[00:05] | I need to document Haley’s first standard chain gang. | 我要记录下海莉的第一次”铁链劳役”行为 |
[00:07] | It’s not a chain gang. | 那不是铁链劳役 |
[00:08] | It’s community service. And leave her a lone. | 那是社区服务 别烦她了 |
[00:11] | She feels bad enough as it is. | 她心情已经够糟糕的了 |
[00:12] | Okay, I’m torn. On one hand, I’m like, | 我快精神分裂了 一方面 我一想到 |
[00:14] | “Ugh, I have to pick up garbage all day.” | 我得捡一整天垃圾 好烦 |
[00:15] | And on the other hand, I’m like, | 但是另一方面 我又想着 |
[00:17] | “Look at me in orange.” | 我穿这身橘红色真好看 |
[00:21] | Aw, that’s cute. Send that to me. | 真漂亮 发给我 |
[00:23] | Haley had a little run-in with the law in college. | 海莉在学校里犯了点法 |
[00:26] | She was arrested for assaulting a police officer. | 她因袭警被捕 |
[00:29] | Accidentally. I fell on him. | 纯属意外 我摔在他身上 |
[00:31] | While evading arrest for underage drinking. | 当时正因为低龄饮酒而逃避逮捕 |
[00:32] | That was on purpose. | 那个是故意的 |
[00:34] | They were very lenient with her. | 他们对她宽大处理 |
[00:35] | She only has to do community service. | 现在她只需做一些社区服务 |
[00:37] | Because I do not have any priors. | 因为本小姐没有前科哦 |
[00:39] | Taking a little too much pride in that, sweetheart. | 你对此有点太得瑟了 宝贝女儿 |
[00:42] | Things can get pretty rough out there. | 外面的世界非常危险 |
[00:44] | I couldn’t get my hands on any cigarettes. | 我实在弄不到香烟 |
[00:46] | But I did make you a shiv out of an old knife. | 但我用一把旧小刀做成了一把尖刀 |
[00:48] | You don’t make a shiv out of a knife. | 你不可能用一把小刀做成一把尖刀 |
[00:50] | Yeah, you make a shiv out of a rusty spoon or a shard of glass. | 是啊 你可以用锈汤匙或者玻璃碎片做成尖刀 |
[00:53] | Or a human femur. | 或者是人的股骨 |
[00:54] | Exactly. Be creative. | 没错 时刻保持创意 |
[00:56] | It’s really sweet of you, Luke, | 你真贴心 卢克 |
[00:57] | But there’s just gonna be a bunch of drunk drivers | 不过那里都是些酒驾司机和 |
[00:59] | and vandalizers who were stupid enough to get caught. | 蠢到会被抓现行的”破坏者”而已 |
[01:02] | Or stupid enough to use the word “Vandalizers.” | 或者蠢到说”破坏者”的人 |
[01:06] | It’s vandals. | 应该说”破坏分子” |
[01:09] | I’m so alone. | 众人皆蠢我独聪 |
[01:12] | They’re gonna eat you alive, suburbia. | 他们会生吃了你 乡巴佬们 |
[01:29] | Mitchell, we’re back. | 米奇尔 我们回来了 |
[01:31] | You are not going to believe this. | 你肯定会觉得难以置信 |
[01:32] | Cam, do you remember why I didn’t want you | 小卡 还记得我为什么不让你 |
[01:34] | to swap out the handles on Lily’s dresser? | 把莉莉衣柜的把手拆掉吗 |
[01:36] | Because you lack a designer’s eye and fear change? | 因为你缺乏设计者的眼光 而且害怕改变 |
[01:38] | No. Because I was afraid two weeks would go by, | 不 是因为我担心两星期之后 |
[01:40] | and we’d still be using a spatula | 我们还在用小铲子 |
[01:41] | to get at Lily’s clothes. | 来拿莉莉的衣服 |
[01:43] | Okay, well, we have bigger issues. | 好吧 现在有个更严重的问题 |
[01:45] | Guess what they are cutting down at the park today? | 猜猜他们今天在公园里砍掉了什么 |
[01:48] | – A tree? – Yes. How did you know that? | -树吗 -对 你怎么知道 |
[01:49] | I played a hunch. | 我”预感”超准 |
[01:50] | Not just any tree, Tree-ona elmsly. | 不是普通的树 而是那棵”欧娜树” |
[01:53] | Oh, no. That’s terrible. That’s our picnic tree. | 不是吧 太糟了 那可是我们野餐专用树啊 |
[01:56] | It’s a nightmare. | 简直是噩梦 |
[01:58] | Well, someone’s picked up her daddy’s gift for hyperbole. | 小姑娘遗传了她老爸爱夸张的毛病哦 |
[02:00] | They are literally chainsawing paradise | 他们要锯掉一片天堂 |
[02:02] | – to put up a parking lot. – Oh, it’s too bad. | -来建一座停车场 -太糟糕了 |
[02:04] | We have to do something. | 我们得采取点措施 |
[02:05] | Well, if we knew earlier, we could. | 如果我们早点知道 是可以 |
[02:07] | I blame myself. I’ve taken on too much. | 我很自责 我揽了太多事 |
[02:10] | What exactly have you taken on? | 你揽了哪些事来着 |
[02:11] | Are you kidding me? Teaching music? | 你开什么玩笑 上音乐课 |
[02:13] | This dresser handle project? My role in the musical? | 拆掉这个把手 出演音乐剧 |
[02:16] | Oh, that. | 哎呀那个噢 |
[02:17] | You know what? I don’t like your tone. | 知道吗 我不喜欢你的语气 |
[02:19] | The understudy’s the most challenging role in any production. | 替角儿在任何演出中都最具挑战性 |
[02:22] | You have to be ready at a moment’s notice | 你必须时刻准备上场 |
[02:23] | to go on and face a disappointed audience | 去面对一群失望的观众 |
[02:25] | who was there to see Kenny Van Heffington. | 他们本来是想看肯尼·范·海辛顿的 |
[02:27] | Our insurance guy? | 那个卖保险的吗 |
[02:29] | He’s breathtaking. | 他的表演激动人心 |
[02:30] | – Really? – Yeah, I hate him. | -是吗 -好吧 我恨他 |
[02:32] | Anyway, what was I talking about? | 无所谓了 我刚刚在说什么 |
[02:33] | Putting new handles on the dresser. | 给衣柜装上新把手 |
[02:35] | Right. The tree. I have to do something. | 对了 树的问题 我得采取点措施 |
[02:40] | I can’t live like this. | 这样的日子我过不下去了 |
[02:46] | Manny, while we’re young! | 曼尼 你再磨蹭我们就老了 |
[02:48] | He doesn’t want to go. | 他不想去 |
[02:49] | That’s why he’s taking so long with the primping. | 所以他才精心打扮了这么长时间 |
[02:51] | A boy his age should do exactly zero primping. | 像他这么大的男孩子根本不该打扮 |
[02:55] | You ready? | 你准备好了吗 |
[02:56] | Not in the least. | 完全没有 |
[02:57] | That’s the spirit. | 就该这样 |
[02:58] | This kid in my class, Doug Brooks, | 我班上有个同学 道格·布鲁克斯 |
[03:00] | has a sports-themed birthday party every year. | 每年都要举办运动主题的生日派对 |
[03:02] | All boys. All sports. All day. | 全是男生 全是运动 全天不停 |
[03:06] | He calls it the Doug-lympics, | 他称之为”道林匹克” |
[03:07] | which might make sense if he did it every four years, | 可那也得他每4年举办一次 |
[03:10] | or if his name was Al. | 或者他名叫”奥”才说得通啊 |
[03:12] | Let’s just say nothing about it works. | 我只能说 一切都是狗屁不通 |
[03:15] | Manny, it’s a beautiful day outside. | 曼尼 今天天气很好 |
[03:17] | Go on. Enjoy your Dougy-lympics. | 去吧 享受你的道林匹克 |
[03:19] | You don’t have to win a medal. Just have fun. | 你不用非得赢奖牌 找点儿乐子就行 |
[03:21] | Doug finishes with the most medals no matter what. | 无论如何道格总会赢得最多的奖牌 |
[03:24] | Plus I think he only invites me | 而且我觉得他邀请我 |
[03:25] | because he likes to match skin color to nation. | 只是因为他喜欢将肤色与国家联系起来 |
[03:28] | I know that’s why Alan Yan gets invited. | 艾伦·严就是因此才会被邀请的 |
[03:29] | Okay, we get it. Sports isn’t your thing. | 我们明白的 运动不是你的强项 |
[03:31] | But you gotta step out of your comfort zone sometime. | 但你有时候得走出自己的”舒适小世界” |
[03:35] | And for god sake, | 看在老天爷的份上 |
[03:36] | change out of those wingtips. | 把这双尖头鞋换了吧 |
[03:37] | You’re a kid. You’re not Nixon on the beach. | 你还是个小孩子 不是沙滩上的尼克松 |
[03:40] | Fine. I’ll put on my sporty shoes. | 好吧 我去换”运动专用鞋” |
[03:42] | Where are they? | 在哪儿来着 |
[03:43] | They’re still in the box. | 在鞋盒里尚未拆封 |
[03:44] | And don’t forget to take out the paper | 别忘了在你穿鞋子之前 |
[03:46] | before you put them on, okay? | 把塞在里头的纸拿出来 好吗 |
[03:47] | And they’re called sneakers. | 而且那就叫运动鞋 |
[03:52] | Hello, hello! | 大家好啊 |
[03:54] | Hey, Gloria. So, ready to go? | 歌洛莉亚 准备好出发了吗 |
[03:57] | – Where? – Thought we were doing a Costco run. | -去哪儿 -不是说好了去逛好市多吗 |
[04:00] | Oh, I see what this is. | 我明白了 |
[04:02] | You called Claire to babysit the stupid pregnant lady! | 你打电话叫克莱尔来照顾我这个傻瓜孕妇 |
[04:05] | You’re the one who called her. | 是你打电话给她的 |
[04:07] | I did? | 我有吗 |
[04:08] | I called Claire. | 我打给克莱尔的 |
[04:09] | Gloria needs watching. | 得有人看着歌洛莉亚 |
[04:11] | She’s got a serious case of pregnancy brain. | 她的孕期健忘症很严重 |
[04:14] | Last week, I found a bar of soap in the fridge | 上周我在冰箱里找到一块肥皂 |
[04:16] | and a stick of butter in the shower. | 在浴室看到一块黄油 |
[04:18] | I walked around all day smelling like a bucket of popcorn. | 我洗完一整天浑身都是爆米花般的黄油味 |
[04:22] | Better than the toast I ate. | 总比我吃的”肥皂吐司”强 |
[04:24] | Yet you ate the second piece. | 那你还吃了两块 |
[04:27] | Jay! Bye-bye! We’re leaving! | 杰 拜拜了 我们走了 |
[04:29] | Seriously? I’m right here. | 不是吧你 我就站在这呢 |
[04:37] | Duck! Duck! Come on and hit him, you little freak! | 下蹲 下蹲 揍他 你个小怪胎 |
[04:41] | Talk about a big left hook. | 那也敢号称是左勾拳 |
[04:43] | God, I love you. | 天呐 我爱你 |
[04:45] | Phil in the blank! | 菲尔填空 |
[04:45] | Bill of rights! | 比尔法案 |
[04:47] | Jerry-atric! | 老杰瑞 |
[04:48] | Alan’s dad! | 艾伦他爹 |
[04:50] | Hey, guys. Luke, you getting in there? | 伙计们 卢克 你准备好了吗 |
[04:52] | Of course. | 当然 |
[04:53] | Look, I’m Mexico. Again. | 看呐 又让我代表墨西哥队 |
[04:57] | Does anybody care that I’m not from mexico? | 到底有没有人在乎 我不是墨西哥来的 |
[04:59] | You keep saying that, | 你总那么说 |
[05:00] | but we’ve never seen a birth certificate. | 不过我们谁也没看过你的出生证明 |
[05:01] | All right, look, I’ll pick you up at 5:00. | 好了 我5点钟会过来接你 |
[05:03] | Knock yourself out. | 玩得”昏”天暗地吧 |
[05:04] | Or better still, knock someone else out. | 或者更好的 拳击场上把别人打”昏”吧 |
[05:07] | Jay, where you headed? | 杰 你要去哪儿 |
[05:07] | Why don’t you stick around and grab a beer with the dads? | 你不如就在这里和其他当爹的喝杯啤酒吧 |
[05:09] | Oh, I don’t really know those guys. | 我都不认识这些人 |
[05:10] | I think I’ll just swing by the club, hit a few balls. | 我想我还是去趟俱乐部 打打球吧 |
[05:12] | Well, come here. Let me introduce you around. | 来吧 我介绍你跟他们认识 |
[05:14] | Hey, guys, | 嘿 伙计们 |
[05:16] | This is Jay, my father-in-law. Manny’s stepdad. | 这位是杰 我的岳父 曼尼的后爹 |
[05:18] | Hey, what’s up, Jay-lo? | 你好吗 “杰冻” |
[05:19] | Okay, guys, I’ll see you later. | 够了伙计们 失陪了 |
[05:21] | What’s the matter, Jay? | 怎么了 杰 |
[05:22] | Afraid to step outside your comfort zone? | 不敢踏出自己的”舒适小世界”吗 |
[05:24] | I will send you back to Mexico. | 我要把你遣返墨西哥 |
[05:28] | I didn’t really call you, did I? | 其实不是我叫你过来的 对吧 |
[05:30] | No, my dad did. But I thought you knew. | 对 是我爸 不过我还以为你知道呢 |
[05:33] | Ugh. I want to be so mad at him, | 我想对他大发雷霆 |
[05:34] | but he’s right. | 可他是对的 |
[05:36] | I have two brains in my body, | 我现在身上有两个脑袋 |
[05:38] | but I’ve never been so dumb. | 却史无前例得傻 |
[05:39] | It happens. I get it. | 正常 我理解你 |
[05:40] | You have another human being inside of you, | 你身体里还有另外一个人 |
[05:42] | competing for resources. | 跟你争夺营养 |
[05:44] | Look, when I was pregnant with Alex, | 当年我怀艾丽克斯的时候 |
[05:45] | I could barely remember my name. | 我连自己叫什么都记不住 |
[05:47] | Same with Haley and Luke? | 怀海莉和卢克的时候也这样吗 |
[05:48] | Mm, not so much. | 没那么严重 |
[05:50] | They kind of just hung out in there, let me do my thing. | 他们好像就在里面闲着似的 随便我做什么 |
[05:52] | Thank you for understanding. | 谢谢你理解我 |
[05:54] | I’m glad that you came. | 你过来我真高兴 |
[05:56] | It will help me not to forget stuff. | 有助于避免我忘了什么事儿 |
[05:58] | I’m glad I can help out. I– | 我也很高兴能帮上忙 我… |
[06:01] | Why didn’t you stop first?! | 你为什么不先停车 |
[06:04] | Where’s daddy? | 大爸在哪儿 |
[06:06] | I don’t know, sweetie. | 我不知道 亲爱的 |
[06:07] | He said to meet him by Tree-ona. | 他告诉我在欧娜树那里见 |
[06:08] | Mitchell! Lily! | 米奇尔 莉莉 |
[06:09] | Where is he? | 他在哪儿 |
[06:10] | Up here! Look up here! | 上面 往上看 |
[06:12] | Cam, what are you doing up there? | 小卡 你在上面干嘛 |
[06:14] | I came down to say good bye to the tree, | 我本来想过来和这棵树道别 |
[06:16] | give it one final hug, | 给它最后一个拥抱 |
[06:17] | and before I knew it, I was up here. | 不知道怎么 就上来了 |
[06:19] | When you say “One final hug”… | 你刚说”最后一个拥抱”其实是… |
[06:21] | If I’m occupying the tree, they can’t cut it down. | 要是我占住这棵树 他们就不会砍它了 |
[06:23] | I googled it. It’s a thing. | 我谷歌了一下 是真的 |
[06:25] | Okay, Lily, see, this is a nightmare. | 莉莉 你看 这就是个噩梦 |
[06:27] | Tell me about it. | 那还用你说 |
[06:29] | You know what? You’re a list-maker, a planner. | 说实话 你喜欢列好要做的事 提前规划 |
[06:32] | I’m a doer and an action taker! | 我是践行者和实干家 |
[06:35] | Sean Penn would play me in a movie about this, | 如果他们拍这种电影 会找西恩·潘演我 |
[06:37] | or Anne Hathaway, if they wanted a female-driven vehicle. | 如果他们想拍女性题材的 会找安妮·海瑟薇 |
[06:40] | And who would play your long-suffering partner? | 那会找谁扮演你饱受折磨的伴侣呢 |
[06:42] | Julianne Moore, either way. | 朱莉安·摩尔 两种都是她 |
[06:44] | I would totally see that. I would. | 我能看出来 我能 我知道 |
[06:45] | Hey! My supervisor wants to know | 你好 我领导想知道 |
[06:48] | if you have a history of mental illness. | 你有没有精神病史 |
[06:49] | No, sir, I do not. | 没有 先生 我没有 |
[06:56] | All right, Cam, let’s hear. What’s the plan? | 好了 小卡 说来听听 有什么计划 |
[06:58] | I don’t know. I’m sort of making it up as I go. | 我不知道 我是走一步看一步 |
[07:00] | Are you sure you wanna do this? | 你确定你想要这么做 |
[07:02] | Yes. I’ve never been more sure about anything in my life. | 我这辈子从来没对什么事这么确定过 |
[07:05] | We need to teach our daughter the value of taking a stand, | 我们得教会女儿树立坚定立场的价值 |
[07:08] | no matter the sacrifice! | 无论付出什么代价 |
[07:12] | Hello? | 喂 |
[07:15] | Done. I’ll be right there . | 好的 我立刻就来 |
[07:18] | Mitchell, you need to get up here. I have to go. | 米奇尔 你得上树来 我得走了 |
[07:19] | Excuse me? | 什么 |
[07:20] | That was my theater troupe. An actor’s sick. | 是我们歌剧团打来的 有个演员病了 |
[07:21] | I have to go and do the matinee. | 我得过去 顶一场日场演出 |
[07:23] | What happened to showing Lily the value of taking a stand? | 不是说要教莉莉树立坚定的立场吗 |
[07:25] | It’s the lead. | 那可是个主角 |
[07:27] | It’s also important to show her the value | 向她展现一个人信守承诺 |
[07:29] | of honoring one’s commitments. | 也是非常重要的 |
[07:30] | And in this case, my commitment preceded my stand! | 这种情况下 我的承诺优先于我的立场 |
[07:33] | This is so you, Cam. | 真是你的一贯作风 小卡 |
[07:35] | You start something, and then you expect me to finish it. | 你发起一件事 却总指望我替你收场 |
[07:37] | So you’re not coming up here? | 所以你是不会上来的是吗 |
[07:38] | No! No, I’m not. Come on. | 不 我才不 走吧 |
[07:41] | Mitchell? | 米奇尔 |
[07:42] | Where were we the first day Lily rolled over? | 莉莉第一次翻身那天我们在哪儿 |
[07:45] | Under this tree. | 在这棵树下 |
[07:46] | Where is home base when we play hide-and-go-seek? | 我们第一次玩藏猫猫的大本部在哪儿 |
[07:48] | Under this tree. | 在这棵树下 |
[07:49] | And where did we take shelter | 还有 在危险的暴雨闪电中 |
[07:51] | during that dangerous lightning storm? | 我们的避难所在哪儿 |
[07:53] | Wasn’t a good idea, but it was under this tree. | 虽然那不是个好主意 不过是在这棵树下 |
[07:56] | Daddy, you’ve got to save the tree! | 爹地 你一定要救救这棵树 |
[07:59] | Yeah, daddy, you have to save the tree! | 是啊 爹地 你得救救这棵树 |
[08:01] | Okay, okay. | 行 好吧 |
[08:01] | But you get back here the second you are done. | 但你完事以后立马给我回来 |
[08:04] | Well, I can’t very well turn away fans that come backstage. | 我不擅长拒绝那些冲到后台求签名的粉丝 |
[08:06] | The second! | 立马回来 |
[08:15] | Last summer, my sister took a totally humiliating photo of me. | 去年夏天 我姐拍了一张我的大糗照 |
[08:22] | Haley, that’s not funny! | 海莉 这不好笑 |
[08:23] | Then she posted it to Facebook | 她把照片发到了Facebook上 |
[08:25] | and refused to take it down. | 并且拒绝删掉 |
[08:27] | It got 873 likes. | 有873个人赞 |
[08:29] | Meanwhile, there’s not one embarrassing photo of Haley. | 与此同时 我却一张海莉的糗照都没有 |
[08:33] | Even her mug shots were cute. | 连她的犯罪照都很漂亮 |
[08:36] | Today, I get my revenge. | 今天 我要报仇雪恨 |
[08:39] | One photo of Haley, dirty, sweaty, | 拍一张海莉脏兮兮 汗淋淋 |
[08:41] | picking up trash like a criminal. | 像罪犯一样捡垃圾的照片 |
[08:43] | It’ll be my finest moment. | 那会成为我最得意的时刻 |
[08:46] | In a few years, I hope to have some more friends | 我希望自己能在近几年内多交些朋友 |
[08:47] | and not have time for this kind of stuff. | 别再闲到干这种事的地步 |
[08:53] | Okay. Hey. | 我回来了 |
[08:54] | Where did you go? | 你去哪了 |
[08:55] | To get a sweatshirt. | 去拿了件运动衫 |
[08:56] | We’ve been standing in the frozen food aisle for half an hour. | 我们已经在速冻食品区站了半个小时了 |
[08:59] | I need something frozen. | 我要买速冻食品 |
[09:00] | Right. What? | 好 买哪个 |
[09:02] | I don’t know. I just wrote the word “frozen.” | 不知道 我只写了一个”冻”字 |
[09:05] | Okay. Uh, let’s think. | 好吧 好好想想 |
[09:07] | Peas. Ice cream. Pizza. Waffles. | 豌豆 冰激凌 冻比萨饼还是华夫饼 |
[09:09] | Wait a minute. | 等一下 |
[09:11] | It says “dozen.” I need the eggs! | 我写的是”打”字 我要买的是鸡蛋 |
[09:13] | Ah, the eggs. Okay. | 是鸡蛋啊 好 |
[09:15] | Ay, no, on the other side. | 不对 在另一边 |
[09:17] | Oh, god. I-I’ll get the carts. | 老天 我 我来推车 |
[09:18] | So that’s… Oh, sorry. | 真是… 抱歉 |
[09:21] | That’s… That’s me. That’s me. I got it. | 那辆也是我的 是我的 我抓住了 |
[09:26] | Come on, guys! You’re killing us! | 加把劲 伙计们 我们快顶不住了 |
[09:28] | Where the heck is Mexico? | 墨西哥小子跑哪去了 |
[09:30] | Good news, gentlemen! I found another rope. | 好消息 先生们 我又找到一根绳子 |
[09:32] | If we double-dutch, everyone wins. | 我们可以玩跳双绳 大家双赢多好 |
[09:35] | Okay, hold still… | 好 别动 |
[09:37] | And wait for it… | 等一下 |
[09:39] | This is what you’d look like fat and bald. | 来瞧瞧你发胖加秃顶以后的样子 |
[09:43] | On my phone, that app’s called a camera. | 我自拍一张 不装那个应用也是这样的效果 |
[09:45] | Bill, don’t do that to yourself. | 比尔 别这么妄自菲薄 |
[09:46] | Let me tell you something. Ellen is one lucky woman. | 告诉你吧 艾琳是个幸运的女人 |
[09:51] | Why is that funny? | 这有什么好笑的 |
[09:51] | Because she’s married to Jerry. | 因为她老公是杰瑞而不是比尔 |
[09:55] | Jay, you got any good apps? | 杰 你手机里有什么好玩的应用 |
[09:56] | I don’t know. I got call waiting. Is that an app? | 不知道 我有呼叫等待功能 那算吗 |
[10:00] | You guys laugh a lot, huh? | 你们很爱笑 是吧 |
[10:01] | Jay’s a little technologically challenged. | 杰对电子产品不太在行 |
[10:03] | From a guy who can’t drive a stick. | 你个不会开手动挡车的人还敢说我 |
[10:05] | – What? – You can’t? | -什么 -你真不会吗 |
[10:06] | Well… he called me to rescue him one time. | 有一次他打电话叫我去营救他 |
[10:08] | He got stuck on a hill. He was afraid to let go of the clutch. | 他停在一个坡上 不敢松离合器 |
[10:11] | By the time I got there, | 我赶到的时候 |
[10:12] | traffic’s backed up half a mile, | 他后面排了半英里长的车队 |
[10:14] | everybody’s yelling at him. He’s in tears. | 所有人都在冲他嚷嚷 他急得直哭 |
[10:16] | Not tears. Maybe sweat. | 我没哭 是出的汗 |
[10:18] | Yeah, sweatin’ out your eyes. | 是 他眼睛出了汗 |
[10:26] | I had about ten pretty bad pictures of Haley. | 我拍到了差不多10张海莉的糗照 |
[10:29] | I could have quit right there, | 我本可以就此收手 |
[10:30] | but I’m a perfectionist. | 但我是个完美主义者 |
[10:32] | I thought, | 我琢磨着 |
[10:33] | “I could do better. She could look worse.” | “我能做得更好 我会拍到更难看的” |
[10:38] | Oh, my god. | 天呐 |
[10:44] | All right, pal. | 行了 哥们 |
[10:45] | Come down from the tree. | 从树上下来吧 |
[10:46] | Sorry, can’t do that. | 抱歉 我做不到 |
[10:48] | Come down before we pull you down. | 再不下来我们就把你拽下来 |
[10:50] | W–hey. Ease up. | 淡定 别动粗 |
[10:52] | What’s the problem? | 有什么问题 |
[10:53] | Look, I don’t want to be up here. | 听着 我也不想呆在树上 |
[10:54] | You know? But this is my daughter’s favorite tree. | 懂吗 但这是我女儿最心爱的一棵树 |
[10:57] | And my partner– he’s all up in arms | 我家男人 他也竭力反对 |
[10:58] | about them cutting it down, so… | 他们把树砍掉 所以… |
[11:00] | Well, if your partner’s so worked up, why isn’t he here? | 你男人既然那么热衷 他为什么没来 |
[11:02] | Oh, well, that’s a very good question. | 你这问题问得真好 |
[11:04] | It’s because he starts things, and he doesn’t finish them, | 那是因为他习惯了做事有始无终 |
[11:06] | so then I have to. | 所以我就要替他收场 |
[11:07] | Just like my wife. | 跟我老婆一模一样 |
[11:08] | You know, my therapist would say we’re “enabling” them. | 我的心理医生会说我们这样是在纵容他们 |
[11:11] | You and your therapist. | 又是你的心理医生 |
[11:13] | I wouldn’t have to see him if you hadn’t shot that guy. | 要不是你枪击了那家伙 我也不用去看心理医生啊 |
[11:15] | Aw, that again? | 不是吧 又来 |
[11:17] | Look, let’s just spray him with the fire hose. | 我们用消防水管把他喷下来得了 |
[11:18] | You’re not helping, Terry. | 你只会越帮越忙 泰瑞 |
[11:20] | It’s not your fight. | 那不是你的”战斗” |
[11:22] | So why don’t you do us a favor, | 所以你何不给我们个面子 |
[11:24] | and come on down? | 从树上下来吧 |
[11:25] | Because he’s right, all right? | 因为他是对的 懂吗 |
[11:26] | That’s the frustrating part. | 那是最让我无奈的 |
[11:28] | I-I’ve been sitting up here these past few hours, | 我在这上面坐了几个小时了 |
[11:30] | and… this tree is beautiful, okay? | 而且 这棵树很漂亮 好吗 |
[11:33] | And I-I can hear the squirrels dancing through the branches, | 我能听到小松鼠们在树枝间穿梭的声音 |
[11:37] | you know, chasing each other, | 他们追逐嬉戏 |
[11:39] | no idea what’s about to happen. | 全然不知这乐园要被摧毁了 |
[11:40] | You know, this isn’t just a tree. | 你知道吗 这不只是一棵树 |
[11:43] | This is a home. | 而是一个家园 |
[11:44] | Yeah, to, like, a hundred rats. | 没错 一大家子老鼠的家园 |
[11:46] | They’re all over this thing. | 树上到处都是老鼠 |
[11:48] | Well, that changes nothing. | 你说什么都没有用 |
[11:49] | I will wait you guys out all night if I have to. | 要是有必要 我会在这跟你们耗一晚上 |
[11:51] | Cam, you got 20 minutes, | 小卡 给你20分钟 |
[11:52] | and I’m out of this tree. | 再不回来我就下去了 |
[11:55] | Terry, you wanna get ready with that hose? | 泰瑞 去把消防水管准备好吧 |
[11:58] | So Alex comes home from school the other day, | 有一天艾丽克斯放学回来 |
[12:00] | and she said the teacher didn’t know what she was talking about, | 跟我说她老师听不懂她说的话 |
[12:02] | when in reality, I don’t think that– | 但实际上 我不觉得… |
[12:05] | You almost just cut my head off. | 你差点把我的头砍下来 |
[12:07] | You gotta focus. | 你得注意点 |
[12:08] | I am sorry. After all that, I forgot the eggs! | 对不起 到头来 我还是忘了买鸡蛋 |
[12:11] | – Excuse me. – Yeah, hang on one second. | -打扰一下 -你等会儿 |
[12:13] | Listen, this is not just your pregnancy. | 听我说 你犯傻不只是因为怀孕 |
[12:15] | You are purposely turning your brain off. | 你这是故意让你的大脑停工 |
[12:16] | You have to at least try to pay attention. | 你至少得有意识地稍微注意一点 |
[12:18] | – Ma’am? – Yeah. | -女士 -怎么 |
[12:19] | Do you have a receipt for that sweatshirt? | 你有这件运动衫的收据吗 |
[12:21] | Oh, shoot. | 糟糕 |
[12:22] | I’m gonna need you to come back into the store. | 你得跟我回商场一趟 |
[12:23] | Oh, no. No, it’s–I forgot I was wearing it. | 不 不 我只是忘了我还穿着它了 |
[12:25] | It’s no big deal. Here. | 没什么要紧的 给你 |
[12:26] | Ma’am. The store. | 女士 跟我回商场 |
[12:28] | Are you kidding me? | 别开玩笑了 |
[12:29] | I didn’t try to steal a sweatshirt! | 我真没想偷这运动衫 |
[12:31] | Sir, I’m a mom. | 先生 我可是位母亲 |
[12:32] | Gloria, help me out. | 歌洛莉亚 帮帮我 |
[12:33] | Listen, Mr. Policeman, | 听好了 警察先生 |
[12:35] | If we wanted to steal it, | 我们真要偷 |
[12:36] | You wouldn’t even know that it was gone! | 你压根不可能发觉它不见了 |
[12:38] | Yeah, okay. That’s not helping. | 行了 你这是帮倒忙 |
[12:56] | Oh, my god! A gold bracelet! | 天呐 一只金手镯 |
[12:58] | Hey, can we keep what we find? | 捡到的东西能归我们吗 |
[13:02] | Unbelievable. | 无语了 |
[13:07] | Really? | 不是吧 |
[13:12] | Gentlemen, you wanna know about | 先生们 你们想知道 |
[13:13] | the real ultimate frisbee? | 什么是真正的飞盘比赛吗 |
[13:15] | Walk with one balanced on your head for 50 meters. | 头顶着飞盘走50米不让它掉下来 |
[13:17] | It is a measure of poise, balance, and posture. | 它需要你的姿势 平衡和体态 |
[13:20] | Let’s just whip the frisbees at each other as hard as we can | 我们就尽可能用力地相互扔飞盘吧 |
[13:23] | and see who quits first. | 看谁第一个退出 |
[13:24] | Frisbee smash. | 飞盘大战 |
[13:26] | Awesome! Let’s go! | 酷毙了 开始吧 |
[13:27] | Oh, my god, I’m Sisyphus. | 天呐 我苦命得和西西弗似的 |
[13:28] | [西西弗 科林斯国的暴君 死后入地狱被罚做永无休止的推巨石苦工] | |
[13:29] | A big one! | 大苦逼 |
[13:32] | So he’s out in our yard and he’s got a boombox… | 他当时在我家院子 提了个录放机 |
[13:35] | What’s the name of that movie with the boombox? | 那个提录放机情节的电影叫什么来着 |
[13:37] | – Oh, “Say anything.” – With John Mahoney. | -《情到深处》 -约翰·马奥尼演的 |
[13:39] | So anyway, he’s out there, | 总之 他就站在那儿 |
[13:40] | And he’s begging Claire for forgiveness. | 恳请克莱尔原谅他 |
[13:42] | She’s still mad at him. She won’t have any of it. | 但她还在气头上 完全听不进去 |
[13:45] | So he turns it up full-blast, | 然后他把音量开到最大 |
[13:47] | And it’s Olivia Newton-John. | 放的竟然是奥莉维亚·纽顿-约翰的歌 |
[13:50] | And he starts singing, “Let’s get Phil-sical”! | 他就开始唱《让我们一起”菲动”》 |
[13:55] | It was an inside joke. | 那是个小范围的内部笑话 |
[13:56] | Well, not anymore! | 不再是喽 |
[13:58] | Okay, enough with the funny Phil stories. | 行啦 开心果菲尔的故事就到此为止吧 |
[14:00] | No, but I haven’t even gotten to the best part yet. | 别啊 我还没说到最精彩的地方呢 |
[14:01] | So he’s doing his little dance, and I can’t take it anymore, | 他还载歌载舞 我当时真心看不下去了 |
[14:04] | So I nail him with the sprinklers! | 就对准他开了洒水器 |
[14:07] | Yep, and you also shorted out my boombox, | 是啊 你还把我的录放机搞短路了 |
[14:09] | which you said you’d replace and you never did. | 你当时说会赔我一个 到现在也没影 |
[14:11] | I never said that! | 我肯定没那样说过 |
[14:12] | Yes, you did. You still owe me one boombox, | 你真说过 你现在还欠我个录放机 |
[14:14] | 12 “D” batteries, | 12节D型电池 |
[14:15] | and an Olivia Newton-John cassingle. | 和一盒奥莉维亚·纽顿-约翰磁带 |
[14:17] | Okay, uh… | 好吧 那… |
[14:19] | Why don’t we settle it in the ring? | 我们在拳击场里解决这事吧 |
[14:21] | We get in there, | 我们去那较量 |
[14:22] | and if you beat me, I’ll buy you any boombox you want. | 如果你赢了 要什么录放机我都给你买 |
[14:25] | If I beat you, | 如果我赢了 |
[14:27] | then you’ve gotta do your little dance for everyone. | 你就得在大家面前跳那舞 |
[14:31] | I’m in. | 我应战 |
[14:32] | Let’s get Phil-sical. | 我们”菲动”起来 |
[14:35] | I wasn’t worried. I’d boxed in the navy. | 我一点都不担心 当海军时我打过拳击 |
[14:38] | And it was Phil. | 而且对手是菲尔 |
[14:39] | And here’s something I thought I’d never say– | 我从没想到我会说这种话 |
[14:42] | I’d rather box my daughter’s husband than my son’s. | 我宁愿和我女婿打 也不愿和我”儿婿”打 |
[14:57] | I may have been holding on to a tiny bit of anger towards Jay. | 或许对杰 我一直酝酿着一丝丝怒气 |
[15:01] | I scooped ice cream all summer for that boombox! | 我卖了整整一夏天的冰淇淋才买了那台录放机 |
[15:11] | Excuse me. Pardon me. We’re here! | 不好意思 让一让 我们来了 |
[15:14] | We came as fast as we could! | 我们紧赶着到了 |
[15:15] | You couldn’t change? | 你就不能换身衣服吗 |
[15:16] | You said come right away! | 不是你说立马过来吗 |
[15:19] | Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen! | 打扰一下 女士们先生们 |
[15:21] | Oakwood Rep’s production of “Cats”! | 奥克伍德剧院出品的音乐剧《猫》 |
[15:23] | Make sure you catch it this week. | 确保这周不要错过哦 |
[15:24] | Word on the street is the understudy steals the show! | 小道消息都说替角儿在里面大出风头了呢 |
[15:29] | Mitchell, I get two more shows! | 米奇尔 我又获得了两个表演机会 |
[15:30] | Kenny Van Heffington’s toenail is infected! | 多亏肯尼·范·海辛顿的脚趾甲感染了 |
[15:32] | Just get up here, all right? | 赶紧上来 好吗 |
[15:34] | The crew has to leave at dark, | 工作人员天黑才走 |
[15:35] | so you have until then. | 所以你得坚持到那时候 |
[15:37] | Easy peasy. | 小菜一碟 |
[15:39] | Sweetie, tell daddy what you thought of my performance. | 宝贝 跟二爸说你觉得我的表演怎么样 |
[15:41] | Transcendent. | 出类拔萃 |
[15:42] | Oh, jeez. | 我的天 |
[15:44] | Is this sap? | 是树液吗 |
[15:47] | Why would I buy hundreds of dollars worth of merchandise | 我都买了几百美元的商品了 |
[15:50] | and then steal a $20 sweatshirt? | 为什么还要偷件20美元的运动衫 |
[15:52] | I don’t know. Maybe you do it for the thrill. | 我不知道 或许你是要找刺激 |
[15:55] | I know your type. | 你这类人我见得多了 |
[15:57] | You’re a bored housewife, drives a minivan, | 无聊的家庭主妇 开辆小面包 |
[15:59] | husband spends a little too much time online. | 丈夫沉迷网络 |
[16:01] | Got a couple of kids, a college degree you don’t use. | 有两个孩子 和一个派不上用场的大学文凭 |
[16:04] | You could not be more wrong. | 你错得太离谱了 |
[16:05] | Yes. She has three kids. | 没错 她有仨孩子呢 |
[16:07] | Okay, no. No, no. | 行了 不 不用了 |
[16:08] | No, no. No, that’s not helping. | 不 不 不用了 你别帮倒忙了 |
[16:10] | Look, as I said before, it was an accident. | 听着 我已经说过了 那纯属意外 |
[16:13] | Heard it a thousand times. | 你这种话我听过不下千遍了 |
[16:15] | Grandmothers, businessmen, honor students– | 老奶奶 商人 资优生 |
[16:17] | They all say the same thing– | 他们都这么说 |
[16:19] | “It was an accident. | “那纯属意外 |
[16:20] | I don’t know how that clock radio | 我也不知道那个收音机闹钟 |
[16:21] | got in my pants.” | 怎么到我裤子里来的” |
[16:22] | Oh, for god sake! I don’t feel well. | 看在上帝份上 我身体不舒服 |
[16:24] | Let us go. | 让我们走吧 |
[16:25] | Yeah, right. | 想得美 |
[16:27] | Is that even a baby? | 那真是个婴儿吗 |
[16:28] | ‘Cause from here, it looks like a turkey. | 因为从我这角度看过去 跟个火鸡似的 |
[16:32] | I need you to sign this, admitting your guilt, | 我要你在这上面签字 承认你有罪 |
[16:34] | and promising you’ll never return to this store. | 保证再也不上我们商场来 |
[16:36] | I’m not signing that. | 我才不会签这字 |
[16:37] | Okay, great. | 那好 |
[16:38] | Then I’m gonna call the police and I’ll be forced to– | 那我就只能报警 被迫… |
[16:41] | What was that? | 那是什么 |
[16:43] | My water broke! | 我的羊水破了 |
[16:45] | I’m having the baby! | 我要生了 |
[16:52] | Sorry about that. I went a little nuts there. | 对不起 我刚才失控了 |
[16:54] | I don’t know what happened. | 不知道怎么会这样 |
[16:57] | I do. | 我知道 |
[16:58] | I was ragging on you in front of your friends. | 我在你朋友面前大爆你的糗事 |
[17:00] | – Oh, yeah. – Sorry about that. | -是哦 -对不起 |
[17:03] | I couldn’t think of anything else to say. | 我想不到还能说些什么 |
[17:06] | Why not? | 为什么 |
[17:06] | I got 20, 25 years on those guys. | 我跟他们有20到25年的代沟 |
[17:08] | We got nothing in common. | 没什么共同语言 |
[17:09] | It’s only gonna get worse. | 而且情况只会更糟 |
[17:11] | I mean, what’s it gonna be like with the new kid in ten years? | 想想看 10年后我和新宝宝相处会是什么状况 |
[17:13] | Oh, my goodness. | 我的老天 |
[17:16] | You’re insecure and vulnerable. | 你缺乏安全感 脆弱无助 |
[17:18] | This is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. | 我从没见过你这么可爱的样子 |
[17:20] | Shut up. | 闭嘴 |
[17:21] | Who’s a shy bunny? | 瞧这只害羞的兔兔 |
[17:22] | You wanna go one more round, without the gloves? | 你想不戴手套再来一回合吗 |
[17:24] | I’m just playing around, Jay. | 开个玩笑嘛 杰 |
[17:26] | I don’t care how old you are. | 我不在乎你多大年纪 |
[17:27] | I could sit and talk to you all day. | 我可以整天和你聊个没完 |
[17:30] | Those guys really liked you, too. | 那些家伙也是真的喜欢你 |
[17:31] | I don’t care about that. | 我才不在乎 |
[17:33] | Did they? | 真的吗 |
[17:35] | – Even Jerry? – Yes. | -连杰瑞都喜欢我 -是的 |
[17:37] | Well, maybe you’re right. | 也许你是对的 |
[17:39] | I mean, Manny didn’t want to come, and look at him. | 曼尼根本就不想来 你瞧他 |
[17:41] | Looks like he’s having a great time. | 他看起来玩得非常开心 |
[17:42] | So then Luke’s dad grabs the taser from me, | 然后卢克的爸爸从我这里抢走了电击枪 |
[17:45] | – and he was like, “Uhh! Uhh!” – No. No! | -然后他就这样 -不 不是 |
[17:48] | That’s not how it happened. | 事情不是这样的 |
[17:53] | Aah! Ay! Ay! It hurts! | 妈呀 好痛 |
[17:54] | Hang in there! Hang in there! | 坚持下 坚持下 |
[17:55] | Get you to the hospital as soon as I can! | 我会尽快送你去医院 |
[17:57] | I just want to apologize… | 我代表超市 |
[17:58] | one more time on behalf of the store | 再次表达歉意 |
[17:59] | for any stress that I might have caused you. | 抱歉可能给你带来了压力 |
[18:00] | Here, you can keep the sweatshirt as a gift. | 给 这件运动衫就当作是礼物吧 |
[18:02] | And congratulations on this baby, | 恭喜你喜得贵子 |
[18:04] | which is clearly not a turkey. That was– | 很显然这不是火鸡 那只是… |
[18:06] | – Go away now! – Yeah. | -快滚开 -快走 |
[18:09] | Okay. Go on. Go on. Get in. Keep going. | 快上车 快点 |
[18:12] | What hospital are we going to? | 我们要去哪家医院 |
[18:13] | – No! No hospital! – No hospital. Wow. | -不去医院 -不去医院 哇 |
[18:16] | You’re one of those, huh? | 你是在家生产的人啊 |
[18:17] | Okay, please don’t have it in the pool, though. | 好吧 请别在游泳池里生 |
[18:19] | ’cause we swim in there. | 我们还要游泳的 |
[18:20] | I’m not having the baby, Claire. | 我还没到生的时候 克莱尔 |
[18:23] | I was just faking it. | 我只是假装的 |
[18:25] | What? | 什么 |
[18:26] | Not bad for someone with pregnancy brain, huh? | 怀孕的傻脑瓜还能转得这么快 不错吧 |
[18:29] | Okay, that’s good. That was very good. | 非常好 真是太好了 |
[18:31] | Good thinking, Gloria. | 脑子转得真快 歌洛莉亚 |
[18:33] | I’m sorry. I just couldn’t sit there | 抱歉 我不能坐在那里 |
[18:35] | and watch you suffer | 眼巴巴地看着你 |
[18:36] | just because you had turned your brain off. | 就因为脑子停工了而遭罪 |
[18:38] | Okay, I deserved that. | 好吧 是我活该 |
[18:40] | Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no, no. | 不要 不要啊 |
[18:42] | I just blew through a red light. Damn. | 我刚闯了个红灯 见鬼 |
[18:45] | You think you can keep the pregnancy thing up | 你可以再装下 |
[18:46] | for a little while longer? | 快生孩子了吗 |
[18:49] | I feel the head! | 头快出来了 |
[18:51] | Feel it! Feel it! | 出来了 出来了 |
[18:52] | Save it! Save it for the cop! | 等会儿 留着在警察面前装 |
[18:55] | Save it. | 留着 |
[18:59] | All right, guys, that’s it. Pack it up! | 好了伙计们 下班了 收工吧 |
[19:02] | You win for today. See you on Monday. | 今天算你狠 我们周一见 |
[19:06] | That’s it? | 就这样完了吗 |
[19:07] | That’s it. | 就这样完了 |
[19:08] | So I’ll go to city hall on Monday | 我周一会去市政厅 |
[19:09] | and see what I can do, | 看看有没有办法 |
[19:10] | But… You did it, cam! | 但是 你成功了 小卡 |
[19:12] | No, we did it. | 不 我们成功了 |
[19:14] | I had to run away, and you stepped in, | 我有急事离开 你就挺身而出 |
[19:16] | and like an understudy, you gave a brilliant performance. | 就像替补演员 奉献了精彩的表演 |
[19:19] | Yeah, but you’re the star. | 但你才是明星 |
[19:21] | Oh, well… | 好吧 |
[19:22] | Can we stop doing this and go home? | 可以不玩这个了回家吗 |
[19:25] | Yes, Lily, but I want you to remember this moment– | 好的 莉莉 但我希望你记住这一时刻 |
[19:28] | The day your daddies made you proud. | 你大爸二爸让你骄傲的一天 |
[19:35] | Turn her away, Mitchell! Turn her away! | 别让她看 米奇尔 别让她看 |
[19:48] | Alex, what are you doing here? | 艾丽克斯 你在这里做什么 |
[19:51] | Learning a valuable lesson about karma | 学习关于因果报应的宝贵一课 |
[19:55] | and how wrong it is to take pleasure | 以及利用别人的糗事来取乐 |
[19:56] | in people’s embarrassment. | 是非常错误的 |
[19:58] | Wow. I don’t know what any of that means, | 哇 我完全不懂你在说什么 |
[20:01] | but you look like hell. | 不过你的样子好惨 |
[20:03] | – Say “Geek.” – No! | -说”呆子” -不 |
[20:05] | He’s a vandalizer! | 他是个”破坏者”哦 |
[20:11] | 593 likes, and counting. | 593个赞 人数继续上升中 |
[20:19] | Who does he belong to? | 这是谁家走失的小猫咪 |
[20:21] | He’s mine. | 我家的 |
[20:23] | It was a great ending to an amazing day. | 美妙的一天有了一个美妙的结局 |
[20:26] | Look, I even… Made the paper. | 瞧 我甚至 上了报 |
[20:29] | “Bizarre protest saves park tree.” | 古怪抗议拯救公园树木 |
[20:32] | Oh, look what it says. | 看这里写的 |
[20:33] | “This production of ‘Cats’ should be put to sleep.” | 本版音乐剧《猫》该永远不得面世 |
[20:35] | Don’t read that. | 别看那个 |
[20:37] | Don’t… | 别 |
[20:47] | Oh, hey, Gloria. | 你好 歌洛莉亚 |
[20:47] | Listen, I called Jay about borrowing a drill | 我打了电话给杰 借个电钻 |
[20:49] | for my dresser handles. | 装抽屉柜的把手 |
[20:50] | I got it right here, Cam! | 我拿来了 小卡 |
[20:52] | Oh, jeez. What’s with the getup? | 老天 怎么穿成这样 |
[20:53] | Ay, good. You see that, too? | 太好了 原来我没做梦 |
[20:56] | Stella, stop. | 斯黛拉 别这样 |
[20:58] | Ay, shh, shh, shh. Sorry, Cam. | 安静 抱歉 小卡 |
[21:00] | Oh, no, don’t be. I take it as a compliment. | 别这样 它这是在恭维我栩栩如生呢 |
[21:05] | “Cats”–now and forever. | 《猫》 直到永恒 |
[21:07] | Actually, just till next Thursday. | 事实上 只到下周四 |
[21:09] | It’s been described as “Transcendent.” | 演出被形容为”出类拔萃” |