时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:01] | Daddies will miss you both so much! Have the best time! | 爸爸们会很想你俩的 玩得开心哦 |
[00:03] | Bye, honey. | 再见 亲爱的 |
[00:05] | * We’re alone! We’re alone! We’re alone! We’re alone! * | * 家里只有我俩了 只有我俩了 * |
[00:09] | There’s a box out here marked fruit of the month. | 外面有个盒子 上面写着每月水果 |
[00:11] | I’m assuming that means one of you won a contest. | 我想是因为你们赢了比赛才有 不是买的吧 |
[00:14] | So, Pam’s moving back home | 小帕在我们家楼上 |
[00:16] | after living in our upstairs unit for like three years. | 住了大概三年后 终于要搬回家了 |
[00:18] | Uh, okay, it’s been a year and nine days, | 行了 就一年零九天 |
[00:20] | and she chopped us all that wood. | 她帮我们砍了那木头呢 |
[00:22] | Plus, she’s taking Lily back to see my parents. | 而且她带莉莉回去见我父母 |
[00:24] | It’s birthing season so she gets to name her first pig. | 现在是生育季 莉莉可以给她第一只小猪取名了 |
[00:27] | Oh, and then we slaughter it on her 13th birthday. | 等她13岁生日时我们就杀了那猪 |
[00:29] | There’s prayers and dancing. | 那时会有祈祷 也有跳舞 |
[00:31] | It’s not unlike your standard bar mitzvah. | 跟标准的犹太成年礼大同小异啦 |
[00:32] | Except a lot more pork and a lot less Jews. | 不过多了很多猪肉 少了很多犹太人 |
[00:35] | Anyway, we’re excited to have the house to ourselves again. | 总之 我们很高兴又能在家单独相处了 |
[00:38] | * Naked breakfast, naked breakfast * | * 裸体早餐 裸体早餐 * |
[00:42] | Just ignore it. | 别管了 |
[00:43] | * Making sausages and grits, barely coverin’ our bits * | * 做着香肠和粗燕麦粉 衣不遮体 * |
[00:47] | * Cookin’ a frittata while wearin’ nada * | * 煎着意大利烘蛋饼 一丝不挂 * |
[00:52] | I knew you two would keep the side door unlocked. | 我就知道你俩不会锁侧门 |
[00:55] | What would you do if I were a deranged psychopath? | 如果我是变态神经病 你们会怎么做 |
[00:59] | I’d probably start with, “Hi, Mom, what are you doing here?” | 我也许会先说 “妈妈 你来这干什么” |
[01:01] | Jerry and I had a terrible row! | 杰瑞和我大吵一架 |
[01:04] | Well, put on some pants so we can hug. | 穿条裤子吧 我们好拥抱 |
[01:07] | – Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. – Back to back. | -好吧 -背靠背 |
[01:09] | Why didn’t we just back out? | 我们为什么不倒退着出去 |
[01:10] | I don’t know, but we’re already committed to this. | 我不知道 但都开始了就接着这么走完吧 |
[01:25] | Okay, last run, and then we clean up | 好 最后一次试飞 然后我们就开始收拾 |
[01:28] | or your mom will be mad. hang on, here we go. | 不然你妈妈会生气的 等等 成功了 |
[01:30] | And go! | 去吧 |
[01:35] | Nice job. | 做得好 |
[01:37] | Keep her steady. | 保持稳定 |
[01:38] | – Okay. – Got this. | -好 -你可以的 |
[01:41] | No! | 不 |
[01:42] | Oh, no. | 不好 |
[01:43] | Oh, no! | 不好 |
[01:46] | I recently sat for | 我最近坐着 |
[01:47] | my Pritchett’s Closets presidential portrait. | 让人画了普里契特橱柜董事长肖像 |
[01:49] | It’s a dumb tradition my dad started, | 这是我爸开始的愚蠢传统 |
[01:51] | but I kind of love the way mine turned out. | 但我挺喜欢我的画像的 |
[01:54] | At least it’s more understated than his. | 至少这比他的画像更低调 |
[01:56] | The colors are muted | 色彩柔和 |
[01:57] | and I am not wearing a sash and service revolver. | 我也没穿饰带和佩枪 |
[02:01] | We’re dead. | 我们死定了 |
[02:02] | We never should have played with — | 我们不该玩… |
[02:04] | Where is the drone? Did you turn it off? | 无人机呢 你把它关了吗 |
[02:06] | I was asleep. | 人家在睡觉好吗 |
[02:09] | Wow, this place looks dynamite. | 这地方看起来很棒啊 |
[02:12] | I wanted to give Manny a nice premiere for his movie. | 我想为曼迪准备一个很棒的电影首映式 |
[02:15] | He’s been in such a dry spell creatively. | 他最近创意进入了瓶颈期 |
[02:18] | That modern dance recital was like… | 那次现代舞表演… |
[02:20] | Ugh, I couldn’t even look at that leotard. | 我都没眼看那件紧身衣[大便] |
[02:22] | Okay, yeah, he’s a terrible dancer, | 是啦 他是个糟糕的舞者 |
[02:24] | but you don’t have to use that word. | 但你没必要说那个词吧 |
[02:25] | For my film class, I wrote and directed a short. | 为了交电影课作业 我创作并导演了一部短片 |
[02:27] | I felt the horror genre was the best way to grapple with | 我认为恐怖片类型最好地阐述了 |
[02:30] | the struggles of our time. | 我们这一时代的艰难挣扎 |
[02:31] | When Manny first came to me with the project… | 曼尼一开始带着这项目来找我时 |
[02:33] | You read a script I left out and you elbowed your way in. | 你读了我放在家里的剧本 然后就强势参与了 |
[02:35] | Semantics. I was gonna be the silent money. | 意思差不多 我本打算当个静默投资人 |
[02:38] | But it turns out I’ve got some natural storytelling talent, | 但原来我天生有叙事天赋 |
[02:41] | so I took on a more creative role. | 所以我执掌了更偏创作方面的职位 |
[02:43] | In spite of that, I got my first “A.” | 即使如此 我也拿到了我的第一个A |
[02:46] | Our first “A.” | 我们的第一个A |
[02:48] | I can’t deal with my mother’s marriage drama right now. | 我现在没法处理我妈妈的婚姻闹剧 |
[02:50] | Nobody gets the love-lorn back on their feet | 没谁能比我们能更快劝好失恋的人 |
[02:53] | and out the door faster than we do. | 恢复心情 离开咱家 |
[02:55] | We’ll just trot out our — our trusty “Heartbreak kit.” | 我们只需拿出我们可靠的”心碎工具箱” |
[02:58] | Is that in the closet next to the earthquake kit? | 在柜子里的地震工具箱旁边的那个吗 |
[03:00] | And the Eartha Kitt. | 还有艾萨·凯特[音似工具箱] |
[03:01] | Did you put those all in the same place just to delight me? | 你把那些东西放在一起是为了哄我高兴吗 |
[03:03] | I did. | 是的 |
[03:06] | So, you have wine, a self-help book, | 有红酒 一本自助书 |
[03:09] | a-a pillow shaped like the platonic ideal | 形状是柏拉图式男性身体的抱枕 |
[03:11] | of a male torso for cuddling and/or punching… | 可供你拥抱或和撒气 |
[03:15] | And a DVD we made for you called | 还有我们给你录的DVD |
[03:17] | the “Donna Summer Olympics.” | 叫”唐娜·莎曼[夏季]奥运会” |
[03:20] | It’s a compilation of all the sexiest male athletes | 是最性感男运动员们 |
[03:22] | accompanied by the high queen of disco. | 搭配迪斯科女王的合集 |
[03:24] | Oh, you boys. | 你们这些小伙子啊 |
[03:26] | So sensitive to a woman’s needs. | 真懂得洞悉女人的需求 |
[03:29] | Unlike Jerry. | 不像是杰瑞 |
[03:31] | Did I tell you that his mother is living with us? | 我跟你们说了他妈妈跟我们住一起吗 |
[03:34] | Yeah, no discussion. | 没经过讨论 |
[03:36] | She just shows up with her birds. | 她就带着鸟出现了 |
[03:39] | Well, you know, Mom, relationships take sacrifice. | 妈妈 感情是需要牺牲的 |
[03:42] | I mean, when Cam’s sister Pam moved in, | 小卡的姐姐小帕搬来时 |
[03:43] | it w– it was hard on me. | 我也很难接受 |
[03:44] | I-I was constantly worried about | 我一直都担心 |
[03:46] | the lost money on the upstairs rental and… | 损失掉的楼上房间租金 |
[03:49] | You know, Mitchell, maybe we shouldn’t discuss money. | 米奇尔 也许我们不该讨论钱 |
[03:52] | It can be a bit unseemly. | 有些不得体 |
[03:53] | I wasn’t planning on being unseemly, | 我没打算表现得不得体 |
[03:56] | a word I’ve never heard you use before. | 这个词我之前从未听你用过 |
[03:58] | I-I’m simply saying how stressful | 我只是在说 |
[04:00] | having a long-term house guest can be and… | 有个长期的留宿客人压力有多大 |
[04:03] | Oh. ?Oh, sweetie, yeah, take a breath. | 亲爱的 深呼吸 |
[04:06] | Oh, my — Oh, my — Oh, my God. No. No. | 天啊 天啊 不 不 |
[04:10] | You used to do this when I was young. | 我小时候你就这样做 |
[04:11] | Did you get this move from my mother? | 这动作你是从我妈妈那儿学的吗 |
[04:14] | Mitchell, there is no reason for this uns– um, high-temper — | 米奇尔 没必要这样不… 脾气这么大 |
[04:18] | Unseemly! You were gonna say “Unseemly”! | 不得体 你打算说”不得体” |
[04:20] | Unseemly! You stole that word from her. | 不得体 你是从她那学到的这个词 |
[04:22] | Okay, okay, okay. W-What’s going on here? | 好吧 怎么回事 |
[04:23] | Are you two, um… friends? | 你俩是 朋友吗 |
[04:25] | Yes. | 是的 |
[04:26] | We talk on the phone, e-mail, exchange recipes. | 我们聊电话 发邮件 交换食谱 |
[04:30] | Oh. Oh, is she the reason we’ve been eating so much quinoa? | 是因为她我们才经常吃藜麦吗 |
[04:32] | – It’s a super-food. – It’s a super-food. | -那是超级食物 -那是超级食物 |
[04:34] | Okay, okay. Can I talk to you for a second? | 够了 我能和你聊聊吗 |
[04:36] | Come on. | 来 |
[04:38] | Okay, no reason to lie about it, ’cause I already know. | 好 没必要撒谎 因为我已经知道了 |
[04:41] | How long have you been involved with this woman? | 你跟这女人联系多久了 |
[04:43] | Can I ask a question? Is there a chance you’re just | 我能问个问题吗 是不是有可能 |
[04:45] | kind of making this all about Mitchell? | 你在把事情焦点全带到自己身上了 |
[04:48] | That’s her. | 是她 |
[04:49] | Your mouth is moving, but that is her talking. | 你的嘴在动 但这都是她的语言 |
[04:50] | Okay, don’t you see what’s happening? | 你没看出发生了什么吗 |
[04:52] | She’s manipulating you to manipulate me. | 她在操控你来控制我 |
[04:54] | Don’t you think I’m smart enough to know | 难道你不觉得我够聪明 能看出来 |
[04:56] | if I’m being used? | 我是否被利用了吗 |
[04:58] | I also have a mom. | 我也有个妈妈 |
[04:59] | You’re out of your league here, bumpkin! | 你太高估自己了 土包子 |
[05:01] | Okay, this is a city mother! | 这可是城里的妈妈 |
[05:03] | Wow. What happened to the seemly man I married? | 跟我结婚的那个得体男人上哪儿去了 |
[05:06] | You can’t use it like that. | 这词不能这样用 |
[05:08] | Okay, how’s it looking? | 看起来怎么样 |
[05:11] | Not bad. | 还行 |
[05:12] | Who would’ve thought Mom and Teddy Roosevelt | 谁会想到妈妈和泰迪·罗斯福[前总统] |
[05:13] | were identical front-teeth twins? | 门牙都长得一样呢 |
[05:15] | Okay, just give me a quick minute to dry the glue. | 好吧 给我点时间让我把胶水吹干 |
[05:18] | Oh, can you throw that shirt on a hanger for me, actually? | 你能把衣架上那件衬衫丢给我吗 |
[05:20] | I need to look sharp for Manny’s premiere tonight. | 今晚是曼尼的首映式 我得穿得帅一点 |
[05:22] | I play the Sheriff, which is ironic | 我扮演警长 这很讽刺 |
[05:24] | because I steal every scene I’m in. | 因为我在的每一幕焦点全被我”抢”了 |
[05:26] | Dad, no! It’s melting! | 爸爸 不好 胶水融化了 |
[05:27] | ZZ Top! | 变大胡子了 |
[05:29] | I’ve ruined your mother. | 我毁了你妈妈 |
[05:31] | Wait a second. | 等等 |
[05:32] | Today’s your mom’s monthly spa day. | 今天是你妈妈的每月水疗日 |
[05:34] | I’m not following. | 我没懂 |
[05:35] | Afterwards, th-there’s a brief window | 水疗后会有一小段时间 |
[05:37] | when she’s at her most relaxed and understanding. | 她处于最放松最善解人意的状态 |
[05:38] | It’s the best time to give her bad news. | 那时候最适合跟她说糟糕的消息了 |
[05:40] | I was gonna tell her about the $500 | 我本来打算告诉她 |
[05:42] | I wired to that stranded British guy on the phone, | 我给打来电话求助的骗子英国人汇了五百块 |
[05:44] | but this seems more important. | 但这似乎更重大 |
[05:48] | Hi. Is Mom home? | 妈妈在家吗 |
[05:49] | Honey, you look nice. Why? | 亲爱的 你打扮得真美 为什么 |
[05:52] | Did I hear Mom? | 是有人在说妈妈吗 |
[05:53] | Wait, you’re dressed like a girl. | 等等 你打扮得像个女孩 |
[05:54] | No! You are not using the window. | 不 这次的机会之窗是我的 |
[05:56] | You got the last one! | 上次可是你用掉的 |
[05:57] | Did everyone know about this window? | 大家都知道妈妈的这个机会之窗吗 |
[05:59] | You guys need it too? For what? | 你们也需要吗 为什么 |
[06:03] | Oh, wow. It is not easy doing something that dumb. | 要做出这么蠢的事可不容易 |
[06:06] | Yeah, this is why men are over. | 所以男人肯定完蛋了 |
[06:08] | I hope you enjoyed the last 10,000 years. | 希望你们享受最后一万年 |
[06:10] | Listen, I have to bail on our trip with Mom for Mother’s Day. | 听着 我得推掉母亲节跟妈妈的旅行 |
[06:13] | No! I have to bail, you have to go! | 不行 我也得推掉 你得去 |
[06:15] | She cried when we asked her. | 我们邀请她时她都哭了 |
[06:16] | But my boss invited me to the Met Ball. | 我老板说带我去大都会艺术博物馆慈善晚宴 |
[06:18] | Her therapy dog got the flu, so I get to fly first class. | 她的治疗犬得了流感 所以我可以坐头等舱了 |
[06:22] | Well, on her lap. | 坐在她大腿上 |
[06:23] | But Bill wants to take me away. | 但是比尔想带我去玩 |
[06:25] | This is the first time I’ve had a boyfriend | 这是我第一回有男友 |
[06:26] | who’s not spending Mother’s Day watching “Driving Miss Daisy” | 不会要看着《为黛西小姐开车》度过母亲节 |
[06:29] | and pulling gray hairs out of a hairbrush. | 并从梳子上拔掉白头发 |
[06:30] | Three asks in one window, it’s unprecedented. | 一个机会之窗有三个请求 真是破天荒 |
[06:33] | If we’re gonna pull this off, we’re gonna have to make this | 如果我们要成功 那我们要把家里 |
[06:35] | the most relaxing environment she’s ever walked into. | 布置成她去过的最轻松的环境 |
[06:39] | Surprise! | 惊喜哦 |
[06:40] | – Nana! – Dede! | -外婆 -迪迪 |
[06:41] | I’m sorry to barge in. | 抱歉我不请自来 |
[06:43] | I was visiting Cam and Mitch, | 我之前去拜访了小卡和米奇 |
[06:45] | and there’s some tension over there. | 他俩之间有些紧张 |
[06:48] | Well, where’s my daughter? | 我女儿呢 |
[06:49] | I don’t hear any cooking or cleaning sounds | 我没听到烹饪或者打扫的声音 |
[06:53] | so I assume she’s home. | 所以我猜她在家 |
[06:57] | Dad, what do we do? | 爸爸 我们要做什么 |
[06:57] | Mitchell must’ve brought her. Maybe he’s still out — | 肯定是米奇尔送她来的 也许他还在外面 |
[07:01] | Coward! | 懦夫 |
[07:05] | Oh, just in time. | 刚好赶上 |
[07:06] | “Chapter Five — Toss that clown, | 第五章 扔掉那小丑 |
[07:09] | he’s been keeping you down.” | 他在拖你后腿 |
[07:10] | Cam, I spent my whole life | 小卡 我这辈子 |
[07:11] | trying to get out from underneath my mother’s thumb, | 都想从我妈的五指山下逃出来 |
[07:14] | and I-I finally thought that that was over. | 我以为我终于摆脱了她 |
[07:16] | So to find out that she’s been | 所以当我发现她一直 |
[07:18] | secretly managing me through you — | 秘密地通过你来控制我 |
[07:20] | Okay, before you throw a clot, | 在你气吐血之前 |
[07:22] | please, come look at my laptop. | 拜托你来看看我的笔电 |
[07:24] | Read the e-mails your mother and I have sent. | 读一读你妈和我互发的电邮 |
[07:27] | 743 e-mails! | 743封电邮 |
[07:28] | It’s mostly from one thread. | 大部分都是同一封电邮的来回 |
[07:30] | Okay, look what she says in this one. | 好吧 瞧她在这封里说了什么 |
[07:32] | “Some kitchen items you might like.” | “一些你或许会喜欢的厨房用品” |
[07:36] | – The stove, the tiles… – What? | -炉灶 瓷砖 -什么 |
[07:40] | …the-the-the folksy sign on the wall, Cam! | 墙上的乡村风挂牌 小卡 |
[07:42] | You said that these were your ideas. | 你说这些都是你的主意 |
[07:45] | D-don’t you see she incepted you | 你没看出她潜移默化地 |
[07:46] | and-and designed our whole kitchen?! | 利用你设计了整个厨房吗 |
[07:48] | It was all so diabolical, and it went deep. | 简直不是人 而且越挖越深 |
[07:51] | She tricked us into making every decision in our lives. | 她用计控制我们做了人生中的所有决定 |
[07:54] | For example, 12 years ago, | 例如 十二年前 |
[07:55] | she sent me pictures of adorable Asian babies. | 她给我发了可爱的亚洲宝宝的图片 |
[07:58] | While hitting me with a little reverse psychology. | 同时再利用了我的逆反心理 |
[08:00] | “Mitchell, America has taken so much from the Vietnamese, | “米奇尔 美国已经夺走了越南人那么多 |
[08:04] | do you really want to snatch one of their children?” | 你真的想再抢走一个越南小孩吗” |
[08:07] | I do if you don’t want me to! | 你不想让我做我当然要做 |
[08:09] | Oh, my God, 2004?! | 我的天 2004年 |
[08:10] | Th-that’s a year into our relationship. | 那是咱俩交往一年后 |
[08:13] | “Oh, Cam, I hate to think of you living all alone | “小卡 想到你崴伤了脚 独自一人 |
[08:15] | in that tiny apartment with a broken ankle.” | 住在那间小公寓里 我真揪心” |
[08:18] | ?And on the same day, she’s e-mailing you, | 在同一天 她给你发电邮说 |
[08:20] | “It’s too soon to move in with someone. | “现在和人同居太早了 |
[08:22] | I strongly discourage it.” | 我强烈反对” |
[08:24] | Which is exactly why I did it. | 这就是为什么我和你同居了 |
[08:26] | And because you love me so much. | 还因为你很爱我 |
[08:27] | And because we were in love. Are in love. Yes. | 还因为我们很相爱 是的 |
[08:28] | – Mitchell. – Oh, my God. | -米奇尔 -我的天 |
[08:31] | – She’s everywhere. – She is. | -她无处不在 -真的 |
[08:34] | Cam. | 小卡 |
[08:37] | I’m scared. | 我好怕 |
[08:38] | Jay, you’re abusing my editor. | 杰 你这是虐待我的剪辑师 |
[08:40] | Wait, stop. Back it up. | 等等 停下 后退 |
[08:41] | No, no. The movie’s done. | 不 影片已经剪好了 |
[08:43] | We can’t keep arguing about this! | 我们不能再争执下去 |
[08:44] | Don’t we both want to cut the sheriff?! | 我们不是都想剪掉治安官的戏吗 |
[08:46] | Yes! He stinks on ice! | 是的 他烂到没救了 |
[08:47] | But it hurts the story if we don’t stay on him long enough | 但如果我们剪短他在衣橱里满脸恐惧的镜头 |
[08:50] | in the closet to see the terror on his face! | 会对故事有影响 |
[08:52] | You just want to see the Pritchett’s Closets | 你只是想看他头顶上那块 |
[08:53] | emblem next to his head! | 写着普利切特衣柜的小标牌 |
[08:55] | No, no, no, not again! | 不不不 又来了 |
[08:58] | The red carpet that they sent me is orange, | 他们给我发的红毯是橙色的 |
[09:00] | and they keep putting me on hold. | 他们一直让我待机 |
[09:02] | I never thought that I could hate | 我从没想过一遍又一遍地 |
[09:03] | hearing “She Bangs” over and over. | 听《怦然心动》会让我如此烦躁 |
[09:05] | – You didn’t? – Really? | -没想过吗 -不是吧 |
[09:06] | Manny, give me the movie. | 曼尼 把影片给我 |
[09:07] | I need to make sure that the projector is working | 我需要确保放映机运转正常 |
[09:09] | and that the picture is good. | 画面清晰 |
[09:11] | Here, take it. It’s done, anyway. | 给你 反正已经剪完了 |
[09:12] | I don’t know what to do with this. | 我不会用这个 |
[09:14] | I’m gonna need to borrow your nerd. | 把你的宅男借我用 |
[09:16] | And why don’t you go get me a tomato juice? | 你再给我拿杯番茄汁来 |
[09:18] | Look, I know we’ve had our creative differences, | 我知道我们在创作上意见有分歧 |
[09:20] | but I really think we have a hit on our hands. | 但我真心认为这片会大火 |
[09:23] | I’m pretty proud of it, too. | 我也很为此自豪 |
[09:24] | And a little nervous to put it out there. | 还有点紧张 不敢给世人看 |
[09:27] | ‘Cause you made the monster just like Mom? | 因为你们让怪物听起来像老妈一样吗 |
[09:29] | – No, we didn’t. – What are you talking about? | -我们没有 -你在胡说什么 |
[09:31] | That noise. It’s what she says all the time. | 怪物的叫声和她平时说话一模一样 |
[09:36] | She’s coming! | 她来了 |
[09:44] | Stella, no! Out, out! I’ll kill you! | 斯黛拉 不 出去 我要宰了你 |
[09:49] | How could this happen?! | 怎么会发生这种事 |
[09:50] | We spent weeks perfecting the monster’s trademark scream | 我们用几周时间想完善怪物的标志性叫声 |
[09:54] | by combining a bunch of unsettling noises. | 把各种让人不舒服的声音叠在一起 |
[09:57] | Horror movies are all about the sound. | 恐怖电影重点全在音效 |
[10:00] | Particularly when your special effects budget | 特别是当你的特效预算 |
[10:02] | has been repurposed for an on-set massage chair. | 被用来买了片场按摩椅时 |
[10:04] | Hey, you used it just as much as I did. | 你用得和我一样频繁 |
[10:06] | So, our monster sounds like your mother screaming? | 我们的怪物听起来像你妈的叫声 |
[10:09] | But we didn’t know that before we put it in, right? | 但我们用之前没意识到这点 对吗 |
[10:10] | – No, of course not, we love her. – To the moon. | -当然没有 我们爱她 -爱出天际 |
[10:12] | – Maybe she won’t notice. – We better hope not. | -或许她不会发觉 -最好不会 |
[10:15] | – It’s your movie. – It’s your movie. | -是你的片子 -是你的片子 |
[10:19] | – She’s asleep? How lucky. – Kind of lucky. | -她睡着了 真走运 -算是吧 |
[10:22] | She said she was tired and Haley gave her some…tea. | 她说她累了 海莉给她倒了杯茶 |
[10:25] | What was in the tea? | 茶里放了什么 |
[10:27] | You want her asleep, or you want to ask questions? | 你想让她接着睡还是想问问题 |
[10:29] | Mom just pulled up! | 老妈回来了 |
[10:30] | Quick, longest straw goes first with her, | 快 抽到最长吸管的人先去和她说 |
[10:31] | then medium, then shortest. | 然后是中间的 然后是最短的 |
[10:33] | – Yes! – Yes! | -万岁 -万岁 |
[10:35] | That’s the short straw. You’re last. | 那是最短的吸管 你最后 |
[10:37] | Oh, damn it! I’m so used to a world | 该死 我太习惯于 |
[10:38] | where the smallest size wins. | 尺码最小的人占便宜的世界了 |
[10:39] | This sucks, you guys are gonna use up all of Mom’s happy buzz. | 烦死了 你们会把老妈的好心情都用光的 |
[10:42] | – Oh, there she is! She’s here! – Hurry! | -她来了 她进来了 -快 |
[10:47] | Cover her up so mom can’t see. | 把她盖起来别让老妈看到 |
[10:51] | – There she is! – There’s my beautiful family! | -她回来了 -我美好的家人 |
[10:54] | – Hi, Mom. – Hi, Mom. | -妈 -妈 |
[10:56] | Wait, why are those shirts over there? | 等等 那些衣服怎么放在那 |
[10:58] | Oh, sorry. We didn’t finish the laundry. | 抱歉 我们没洗完衣服 |
[11:00] | Oh, well, don’t sweat it, handsome. | 别担心 帅哥 |
[11:02] | Read a paper, we ain’t got problems. | 读份报纸 今日天下太平 |
[11:04] | So, Mom, we made you lunch, | 妈 我们给你做了午餐 |
[11:06] | but it’s so pretty outside. Let’s have a little picnic. | 但外面天气这么好 我们去野餐吧 |
[11:09] | Yeah, I love that idea. Fun in the sun. | 我喜欢这个主意 阳光下的欢乐时光 |
[11:10] | – Have some fun outdoors. – Life is a picnic. | -户外欢乐时光 -人生就是一次野餐 |
[11:13] | – I’m happy right here. – Okay. | -我在这就很开心 -那好 |
[11:19] | What? | 怎么了 |
[11:20] | Oh, we’re just so nervous that we overdressed the salad. | 我们只是担心沙拉酱放多了 |
[11:22] | I can’t even watch you taste it. | 我甚至不敢看你品尝 |
[11:24] | Oh, please. | 拜托 |
[11:29] | Honey, this is so good. What — | 亲爱的 真好吃 里面都有… |
[11:30] | Mom, I-I hate to have to ask you this, | 妈 我真不忍心开口问你 |
[11:32] | but would you mind if I missed out on our Mother’s Day trip? | 但如果母亲节旅行我不去你会介意吗 |
[11:35] | Oh, no, why? | 不 为什么 |
[11:37] | Well, Bill only gets one weekend off a month, | 比尔每月只休一个周末 |
[11:39] | and he wants to take me to the Grand Canyon. | 他想带我去看大峡谷 |
[11:41] | – On a motorcycle. – What?! | -骑摩托去 -什么 |
[11:43] | Phil, chill. | 菲尔 放松点 |
[11:46] | Sweetie, as your mom, I know I should say no, | 宝贝 我知道作为你妈我该说不行 |
[11:50] | but let’s face it, | 但我们面对现实吧 |
[11:51] | those books aren’t keeping you warm at night. | 那些书本又不能在晚上给你暖床 |
[11:53] | Let’s get some bugs in those teeth, huh? | 去迎风驰骋 让虫子飞到嘴上吧 |
[11:55] | Mom, you are the best. Thank you so much. | 妈 你最棒了 太谢谢你了 |
[11:59] | That is so sweet. | 你人真好 |
[12:02] | Weren’t you just wearing jeans? | 你刚才穿的不是牛仔裤吗 |
[12:04] | No, I was not, | 不是 |
[12:05] | and, Miss Dunphy, my eyes are up here. | 另外 邓菲女士 别盯着人家下面看 |
[12:10] | What is that sound? | 什么声音 |
[12:11] | – The house is settling. – My stomach. | -房子的响声 -我肚子叫 |
[12:12] | Anyways, things are really good at work, Mom. | 话说回来 我工作一切顺利 妈 |
[12:14] | Haley’s trying to cut. | 海莉想插队 |
[12:15] | I finally realized how much sacrifice | 我终于意识到想拥有事业 |
[12:17] | it takes to have a career. | 需要作出多少牺牲 |
[12:18] | You know, my boss, like, she wants me | 我老板想让我和她 |
[12:20] | to go with her on this business trip. | 一起出差 |
[12:22] | But it couldn’t come at a worse weekend. | 但时间实在太不巧了 |
[12:23] | Welcome to the struggle, sister. | 欢迎体验事业女性的纠结 姐妹 |
[12:25] | – The window’s gonna close. – Window? What-what window? | -窗口要关闭了 -窗口 什么窗口 |
[12:28] | Great news. We moved the box in the garage. | 好消息 我们把车库的箱子挪走了 |
[12:30] | – The craziest thing happened — – Talk about crazy things. | -发生了特别疯狂的事 -说到疯狂的事 |
[12:32] | You know how the Met Ball is in New York | 你知道大都会博物馆慈善舞会在纽约 |
[12:33] | and how I weigh the same as a medium-sized dog? | 而我和一头中型犬体重一样吗 |
[12:36] | Haley, the grownups are talking! | 海莉 大人正在谈事情 |
[12:37] | Guys, guys, guys, the knots are coming back. | 大伙 大伙 我脖子上的结节又出现了 |
[12:39] | Mom, I’m bailing on our trip! | 妈 我不和你一起旅行了 |
[12:40] | I made Dad play and we flew our drone into your face! | 我让老爸陪我玩无人机 撞破了你的脸 |
[12:42] | A man named Nigel Pickles | 一个叫奈杰尔·皮克尔斯的人 |
[12:43] | may have our bank account numbers! | 可能掌握了咱家银行账户 |
[12:45] | – I’m gonna go. – Stop! | -我先走了 -不许动 |
[12:47] | Sit down! | 坐下 |
[12:49] | Clearly, you all have bad news to tell me. | 很显然 你们都有坏消息要告诉我 |
[12:52] | But do you have to dump it on me when I’m in a good mood? | 但你们非得在我心情好的时候一起说吗 |
[12:55] | Oh, my God, you did! | 我的天 就是这样 |
[12:57] | That’s what the window is! | 这就是你们说的窗口 |
[12:58] | The one hour a month when I am a human to you people. | 我每个月就这一小时对你们有人情味 |
[13:01] | Sometimes it’s longer. | 有时能多维持一会 |
[13:03] | Let me tell you something. | 让我告诉你们 |
[13:04] | You debutantes have it easy. | 你们这些娇生惯养的过得太轻松了 |
[13:06] | You wouldn’t have survived one day | 要是在我长大时住的那个家 |
[13:08] | in the house where I grew up, | 你们一天都活不下去 |
[13:09] | where an actual crazy person was running the show. | 我家里有个真正的疯婆子作威作福 |
[13:13] | – Um, Claire — – The guilting, the shaming, | -克莱尔 -内疚绑架 羞辱 |
[13:16] | the number of times I heard | 我数不清听过多少次 |
[13:18] | “Where did I go wrong with you?” | “我是哪里没教好你” |
[13:21] | Mom. | 妈 |
[13:21] | – Mom, Nana’s here. – Yeah. I’m sorry. | -妈 外婆来了 -是啊 对不起 |
[13:24] | Save it. I know where I’m not wanted. | 省省吧 我能感到你不欢迎我 |
[13:26] | And no, I’m not trying to guilt you. | 不 我这不是用内疚绑架你 |
[13:29] | I can’t waste the energy on that, | 我浪费不起那个精力 |
[13:31] | as I am basically homeless | 因为我婚姻破裂 |
[13:33] | now that my marriage has unraveled. | 现在基本上无家可归了 |
[13:38] | – Claire — – No! | -克莱尔 -不 |
[13:40] | No! We are going to sit here in silence | 不 我们就一言不发坐在这 |
[13:42] | until it is my turn to storm out. | 直到轮到我摔门而出 |
[13:48] | No drinking! | 不准喝酒 |
[13:50] | For you. | 你不准喝 |
[13:53] | If Mom starts to think the monster sounds familiar, | 如果老妈开始觉得怪物的叫声耳熟 |
[13:55] | I say we tell her it’s Stella barking. | 不如我们告诉她那是斯黛拉的叫声 |
[13:57] | And hurt Stella’s feelings? Think! ? | 然后伤害斯黛拉的感情吗 用用脑子 |
[14:03] | Dede? What are you doing here? | 迪迪 你怎么来了 |
[14:05] | Our children are horrible. | 我们的孩子们好可恶 |
[14:07] | I’m sorry to barge in. | 我很抱歉来得这么突然 |
[14:10] | Oh. Gloria’s holding a soiree. | 歌洛莉亚在举办晚会 |
[14:13] | I should go. | 我该走了 |
[14:14] | You will do no such thing. | 不准你这么做 |
[14:16] | You come with me, young lady. | 你跟我来 小姑娘 |
[14:18] | She was the perfect secret weapon. | 她就是完美的秘密武器 |
[14:20] | We send her upstairs to freshen up, | 我们送她上楼去整理仪容 |
[14:21] | just before the movie starts, we drop the Dede bomb. | 然后在电影开始前 我们放出迪迪 |
[14:24] | Gloria’s flustered, off her game, | 歌洛莉亚就会手足无措 心慌意乱 |
[14:26] | she doesn’t even pay attention to the film. | 根本没有精力注意影片的内容 |
[14:28] | You still got it. | 你果然宝刀未老 |
[14:29] | And to think I was worried last night | 现在想想 昨晚我还在瞎担心 |
[14:31] | when you kept trying to turn on your phone flashlight | 你想打开手机的闪光灯手电筒功能 |
[14:33] | and ended up taking 30 pictures of your angry face. | 结果拍了30张自己的暴怒脸呢 |
[14:36] | There they are, my handsome movie makers. | 他们来啦 我帅气的导演们 |
[14:41] | What are you wearing? | 你穿的什么呢 |
[14:43] | What are you wearing? | 你穿的什么呢 |
[14:45] | What are you wearing? | 你穿的什么鬼呢 |
[14:46] | Whatever I want. | 我想穿什么穿什么 |
[14:47] | Okay, I just found out that my mother | 我刚刚发现我的母亲 |
[14:49] | has been secretly controlling every decision we’ve ever made, | 在背后偷偷控制了我做的所有决定 |
[14:52] | so we are taking our lives back. | 所以我们决定夺回自己的人生 |
[14:54] | She thinks this color washes me out. Well, guess what? | 她觉得这颜色使我脸无光 你们猜怎么着 |
[14:56] | – She was right? – You match the carpet. | -她说得对吗 -你跟地毯颜色很搭 |
[14:59] | Use more teeth when you talk, | 你说话的时候多露出牙齿 |
[15:00] | because I’m losing your whole face. | 因为好难聚焦在你的脸上 |
[15:02] | Okay, pay them no never mind. | 别理他们 |
[15:03] | Uh, she also implied 15 years ago | 她在15年前也暗示了 |
[15:05] | that Cam’s accent was trashy, so that’s also happening. | 小卡的口音很土 所以这也要改回去 |
[15:08] | Yep, and it came right back to me | 是滴 口音立马回来 |
[15:10] | like a cheatin’ husband on his rent day. | 比偷情的男人交房费速度还快 |
[15:12] | Grab yourselves a drink. | 两位去拿杯酒水吧 |
[15:15] | Sorry I’m late. | 抱歉我迟到了 |
[15:16] | What the hell? | 什么鬼 |
[15:17] | Does no one know what | 难道没人懂什么是 |
[15:19] | “Upscale cocktail Hollywood glamour fabulous” means? | “高档鸡尾酒好莱坞闪亮动人”吗 |
[15:22] | – Hello. – Gloria. | -我啊 -我不是吗 |
[15:23] | No, I don’t. I’m sorry. I had to run off some rage. | 我不懂 抱歉 我不得不发泄一下怒气 |
[15:25] | Mitchell, you’re a lawyer. Can I divorce my whole family? | 米奇尔你是律师 我想问我能跟全家离婚吗 |
[15:29] | Are you even facing me right now? | 你现在是面对着我吗 |
[15:31] | Tarnation, here comes your kin! Git! Git! Oh! | 靠咧 你家那堆人来了 溜 快溜 |
[15:35] | Sorry, I’m still working on the balance. | 抱歉 我还在调整口音的度 |
[15:37] | Oh, there’s Mom. Luke, turn your cute on. | 妈在那边 卢克 快打开卖萌模式 |
[15:41] | There’s my Sheriff. | 我的警长大人来了 |
[15:44] | Go. I want to take a picture with the poster. | 我想拍你跟海报 |
[15:46] | I’m sorry, I’m not really in a place — | 抱歉 我现在没心情… |
[15:48] | Pose. | 摆姿势 |
[15:54] | Mitchell? | 米奇尔 |
[15:55] | Sorry, I didn’t see you against the carpet. | 抱歉 没注意到你就在地毯上 |
[15:59] | Mommy? | 妈咪 |
[15:59] | Nope. Not cute anymore. You’re 40. | 少来 不萌了 你都要40岁了 |
[16:02] | You know, forgiveness creates a biochemical reaction that — | 你知道原谅人能产生一种生物化学反应… |
[16:04] | Don’t care. | 关我屁事 |
[16:05] | You’re up. | 到你了 |
[16:09] | You’re gone, aren’t you? | 你走了对吧 |
[16:11] | Okay, everybody, sit down. It’s time to watch the movie! | 好了各位 坐下 到观影的时候了 |
[16:16] | Is Mom still at your house? | 妈还在你家吗 |
[16:17] | Oh, no, she ran off all mad at me. | 她不爽我 气呼呼地跑了 |
[16:20] | I guess I’m not getting a recycled hemp Christmas card this year. | 看来我今年无福收到再生纸做的圣诞卡了 |
[16:22] | Well, Cam and I have a tiny bone to pick with her, too, | 我跟小卡跟她也有点仇 |
[16:25] | for controlling our entire lives. | 因为她想控制我们的生活一切 |
[16:27] | Not that it’ll matter. We all know what she’s gonna say. | 但这又有何所谓 我们都知道她会说 |
[16:29] | “Well, forgive me for caring.” | “我在乎你们是我的错吗” |
[16:32] | – Are you kidding?! – Look who dropped in. | -不是吧 -看看谁来了 |
[16:34] | What a surprise. | 真是个惊喜啊 |
[16:36] | Let me get you a chair. | 我去帮你拿张椅子 |
[16:38] | Oh, don’t bother. Sitting’s the new smoking. | 不用了 坐下仿佛是新时代的抽烟 |
[16:41] | Mom, we need to talk. | 妈 我们得谈谈 |
[16:42] | Oh, no, no. | 别别别 |
[16:43] | Just get in line, sweetie. | 排队好吗 小姐妹 |
[16:44] | Oh, shoot. Well, family first. Let’s reschedule the premiere. | 妈呀 家庭优先 首映改期吧 |
[16:48] | No. You will talk later. | 不行 你们之后再谈 |
[16:50] | Nerd, the lights! | 宅男 关灯 |
[16:59] | Here comes the first test. | 首个难关 |
[17:07] | I can’t believe that Dede is standing up. | 我真不敢相信迪迪居然站着 |
[17:10] | Worked like a charm. | 百试百灵 |
[17:11] | I don’t know what was more genius, bringing Dede in, | 我不知道哪个更天才 是放迪迪来 |
[17:14] | or hooking the audience early with some teenage sex. | 还是影片初期就用青年性事吸引观众 |
[17:16] | You were right to fight for that. | 你争取这一段是对的 |
[17:23] | This is my big scene. | 到我的重要时刻了 |
[17:25] | Big whoop. | 重要个屁 |
[17:26] | Everybody, stop! | 大家都停下 |
[17:29] | We’re better than this. | 我们不是这样的人 |
[17:32] | So let’s just | 我们就… |
[17:35] | think about that! | 自己好好想想吧 |
[17:39] | I don’t know if I was being oversensitive | 我不知道是不是因为 |
[17:40] | because of my situation with Claire, but that editing stung. | 跟卡莱尔吵架而内心敏感 但这剪辑伤我太深 |
[17:44] | My huge speech, a fight with the townspeople, all gone. | 我的重要演说与跟村民的大战 全都没了 |
[17:48] | I’ll never forget you. | 我永远不会忘了你 |
[17:54] | Bravo bravo! | 太棒了 太棒了 |
[17:56] | All right, then. | 好吧 |
[17:57] | – Yeah. – Very nice. | -棒 -好赞 |
[18:00] | Fine filmmaking, Manuel. | 很杰出的电影拍摄 曼纽尔 |
[18:02] | You really got to something visceral. | 真的拍到人心坎里了 |
[18:03] | I feel like I’ve met that monster. | 我感觉我仿佛见过那怪兽了 |
[18:06] | No, no, no. It’s all fiction. Now let’s go eat. | 不不不 都是虚构的 我们去吃饭吧 |
[18:08] | No, you know what, that scream | 不 那个吼声 |
[18:09] | actually sounded somehow familiar. | 其实听起来真有点耳熟 |
[18:11] | – Yeah, it did, didn’t it? – Yeah. | -对啊 真的是这样对吧 -对啊 |
[18:13] | Stella, no! No! Out, out, out! I’ll kill you! | 斯黛拉 不行 出去 出去 我宰了你 |
[18:19] | What? | 什么 |
[18:22] | You made me into your monster! | 你们把我做成你们的怪兽 |
[18:25] | Not on purpose. | 不是有心的 |
[18:26] | It’s just a bunch of awful sounds | 我们只是把 |
[18:27] | laid on top of each other. | 各种让人不舒服的声音叠在一起 |
[18:29] | How is that better? | 这话能安慰到人吗 |
[18:30] | – Well, at least you were in the film. – ?Phil! | -起码你在电影里出现啦 -菲尔 |
[18:33] | Well, now that we’ve reached the Q&A portion of the evening, | 现在我们到了观影后提问阶段 |
[18:35] | I do have a question for Mom, if that’s okay with her. | 我有几个问题想问妈 如果她愿意答的话 |
[18:38] | Or do you want to tell Cam to tell me what to do | 还是你想要唆使小卡来教我怎么做 |
[18:40] | and then use reverse psychology on me? | 并且再利用逆反心理来控制我呢 |
[18:42] | Mitchell, if you want to confront me about something, | 米奇尔 如果你想要跟我当面对质事情 |
[18:45] | do it now. | 现在就问吧 |
[18:46] | No, I’m — I’m gonna do it when I want to do it. | 不 我… 等我想问的时候我再问 |
[18:48] | Well, anyway, you look lovely in the salmon suit. | 顺带一句 你穿这浅橙色西装挺好看 |
[18:52] | Oh, you know what? You know what? | 是吗 那这样吧 |
[18:53] | Okay, well, how about this? Huh? | 怎么样 现在怎么样啊 |
[18:56] | – You realize what she just — – I do realize now. | -你意识到她刚… -我意识到了 |
[18:58] | Okay, you two are being ridiculous. | 你们俩太神经了 |
[18:59] | And if I may come to Mom’s defense for just a moment — | 我不得不来站一下妈这边 |
[19:01] | – Oh, yeah. – What?! | -是的 -什么 |
[19:02] | Yes! Yeah, uh-huh, | 没错 我就来站她队 |
[19:03] | and not just because I owe her an apology, which I do. | 不只是因为我欠她个抱歉 虽然我有欠 |
[19:07] | But, I mean, do you like your lives? | 但是你们喜欢自己的生活吗 |
[19:08] | Are you happy with the way things turned out? | 你们对生活的发展还满意吗 |
[19:10] | Instead of blaming Mom | 与其要责怪老妈 |
[19:11] | for helping you make the right choices, | 帮助你们做出正确的选择 |
[19:13] | how about thanking her? | 为何不改为谢谢她呢 |
[19:15] | You know, it’s not so easy to be the one who always knows best. | 你们知道要永远当最聪明理智的人有多辛苦吗 |
[19:20] | In fact, it can make you a little tense sometimes. | 其实这有时候会让你挺紧绷的 |
[19:24] | This amazing woman runs a company, | 这位优秀的女士经营着一家公司 |
[19:27] | she runs a family, | 照顾着一个家庭 |
[19:29] | and you don’t show her any appreciation. | 而你们却没有一点感激之情 |
[19:33] | Just like you two. | 就像你们两个一样 |
[19:34] | I put you two together to do this movie | 我安排你们两个一起拍一部电影 |
[19:37] | and you turn me into your devil creature. | 你们把我变成你们的可怕怪兽 |
[19:39] | What do you mean you put us together? | 什么叫你安排我们两个一起 |
[19:41] | I left Manny’s script out so that you would see it | 我故意把曼尼的剧本放在那里让你看到 |
[19:43] | and you would get involved. | 好让你自愿下场帮忙 |
[19:44] | I knew that this movie was not going to be good | 我知道这部电影不会好 |
[19:47] | unless I would take his artsy weirdness | 除非我能让他曲高和寡的怪 |
[19:51] | and balance it with your low-brow, couch-tomato sensibility. | 来跟你的粗俗沙发番茄风互补 |
[19:55] | And that’s why it was so great. | 难怪作品这么棒 |
[19:57] | Gloria, I know what you put up with. | 歌洛莉亚 我懂你受了多少委屈 |
[19:59] | I-I was married to Jay. | 我也曾嫁给过杰 |
[20:01] | You are a saint to stick around. | 你对他不离不弃简直像个圣人 |
[20:04] | Especially with that bosom, | 尤其你有那对胸器 |
[20:05] | you could get any guy in town. | 想要哪个男人不是手到擒来 |
[20:08] | So, unfortunately, this is what families do — | 很遗憾的是 家人们就是这样 |
[20:12] | they turn mothers into monsters. | 他们能把母亲变成怪兽 |
[20:15] | – Mom, that’s not fair. – That’s not what we’re doing. | -你这话有失公允吧 -我们才没有这样 |
[20:19] | Everybody stop! | 大家快停下 |
[20:22] | We’re better than this. | 我们不是这样的人 |
[20:25] | What are monsters, but pure, beautiful creatures | 什么是怪兽 它们就是由我们内心恐惧 |
[20:27] | we project our fears onto? | 所反射出来的纯粹美丽生物 |
[20:30] | And are they even scary, | 它们真的可怕吗 |
[20:31] | or are we just too terrified to look inside | 还是只是我们太怯懦 不敢自我审视 |
[20:33] | and see the ugliness and inadequacies in ourselves? | 检讨自己内心的丑陋与不足呢 |
[20:37] | So… | 所以… |
[20:40] | let’s just think about that. | 我们就自己好好想想吧 |
[20:42] | Thank you, Phil. | 谢谢你 菲尔 |
[20:43] | – That’s a nice start. – He’s right. | -这是个好的开始 -他说得对 |
[20:45] | – You’re not a monster. – Mom, we’re sorry. | -你不是怪兽 -妈 我们错了 |
[20:47] | We love you, sweetheart. | 我们爱你 亲爱的 |
[20:49] | If Phil had been half that good when we were rollin’, | 我们拍摄的时候菲尔有刚才一半的表现 |
[20:51] | we never would’ve cut that speech. | 我们就不用剪掉那段演说了 |
[20:52] | He finally just trusted the words. | 他终于领会并相信那些对白了 |
[20:56] | Everybody stop. Oh. I’m stuck. | 大家快停下 我卡住了 |
[21:00] | Is — Is this props or wardrobe? | 是道具还是戏服 |
[21:02] | Cut! | 停 |
[21:03] | Stop! Everybody stop. | 停 大家快停下 |
[21:04] | Everybody, I can’t stop! | 大家 我停不下啦 |
[21:07] | Everybody, | 大家 |
[21:08] | line? | 台词是什么 |
[21:09] | Everybody stop! | 大家快停下 |
[21:11] | We’re better than this! | 我们不是这样的人啦 |
[21:13] | That’s a cut. | 可以停了 |
[21:14] | I’m sorry, guys, | 抱歉各位 |
[21:14] | I’m not hearing it. | 我觉得感情不对 |
[21:15] | Oh actually I’m at work, do you think | 其实我现在正在工作 你说能不能 |
[21:17] | I could send you a picture of the rash? | 我把我起的疹子拍照片发给你呢 |
[21:19] | Damn it Phil, you’re in the shot! | 靠 菲尔 你闯入拍摄了 |