| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:16] | Well, we did it. | 我们做到了 |
| [00:18] | It took three geniuses and 16 years, | 我们出动了三个天才 外加16年 |
| [00:20] | but we finally got our first call to the principal’s office. | 终于完成了人生首次被校长召见的壮举 |
| [00:24] | Being here really brings back memories. | 来到这里唤起了我许多回忆 |
| [00:26] | I almost feel like that class-skipping, | 我几乎又变回那个爱翘课 |
| [00:28] | whippet-doing 16-year-old again. | 爱从鲜奶油罐吸笑气的16岁少女 |
| [00:31] | Yeah. Now you’re just the work-skipping, | 是啊 现在你只是个爱翘班 |
| [00:34] | whippet-doing mom of a boy who gets bullied. | 爱从鲜奶油罐吸笑气的妈妈 有个被霸凌的儿子 |
| [00:37] | Honestly, I’m surprised | 老实说 我很意外 |
| [00:38] | it took Marc this long to get picked on. | 马科居然到现在才被同学欺负 |
| [00:40] | I mean, he’s a weird, gifted kid | 他可是个在大西洋城公立学校 |
| [00:42] | in an Atlantic City public school. | 上学的怪咖天才小孩啊 |
| [00:44] | I wonder what finally did him in? | 不知道他是做了什么才终于惹毛同学 |
| [00:46] | Oh. Could have been a hundred things. | 可能原因多了去了 |
| [00:47] | I mean, he says, “Good morrow.” | 他打招呼会说”问安” |
| [00:49] | He’s a vocal advocate for thyroid health. | 他大力倡导甲状腺健康 |
| [00:52] | He runs like his arms are trying to get away from his torso. | 他跑步时的手臂好像想逃离他的身体 |
| [00:55] | Yes. Yes. | 对 没错 |
| [00:57] | Mr. And Mrs. Bennett? | 本奈特先生 本奈特太太 |
| [00:58] | Oh, my God. Sweetie, are you okay? | 天呐 宝贝 你没事吧 |
| [01:00] | Who did this to you? Just give me a name. | 是谁欺负你 告诉我名字就行 |
| [01:02] | Kids fall off the jungle gym all the time. | 小孩从攀爬架摔下来是常有的事 |
| [01:05] | No, I think you both misunderstood. | 不 你们好像都误会了 |
| [01:07] | Marc wasn’t the victim. He was the bully. | 马科不是受害人 是他霸凌别人 |
| [01:10] | No. No, that can’t be right. | 不 这不可能啊 |
| [01:12] | I mean, Marc couldn’t hurt anybody. | 我家马科怎么可能伤害别人 |
| [01:14] | Last night, he got trapped under his weighted blanket. | 昨晚他还被加重的被子困住出不来 |
| [01:19] | Technically, it was just a top sheet. | 严格来说 那只是张隔开被子的上床单 |
| [01:22] | Marc didn’t use his fists. | 马科不是用武力欺负人 |
| [01:23] | He has a way of making people who aren’t as bright as him | 他有办法令不如他聪明的人 |
| [01:26] | feel inferior. | 感到自卑 |
| [01:27] | Sweetie, you can’t make fun of other kids | 亲爱的 你不能因为其他孩子不如你聪明 |
| [01:30] | because they’re not as smart as you. | 就取笑他们啊 |
| [01:32] | Actually, the victim wasn’t a student. | 事实上 受害人不是学生 |
| [01:35] | You didn’t tell me he was going to be here. | 你没说他也会来啊 |
| [01:40] | – Marc bullied his teacher? – No. | -马科霸凌了他的老师吗 -没有 |
| [01:43] | I simply correct him when he is wrong. | 我只是在他犯错时纠正他而已 |
| [01:45] | Which is all the time. | 而他犯错犯个不停 |
| [01:48] | He has repeatedly undermined me. | 他多次动摇我的权威 |
| [01:49] | I’ve lost the respect of the whole class. | 我已经失去了全班学生的尊敬 |
| [01:51] | You lost that yourself when you said you went to Dartmouth. | 你说你上的达特茅斯学院时 就已经自取其辱了 |
| [01:54] | It’s an Ivy! | 那可是常青藤学校 |
| [01:56] | Sweetie, you can’t treat your teacher like this. | 亲爱的 你不能这样对老师说话 |
| [01:58] | You have to apologize. | 你必须道歉 |
| [02:00] | All I did was tell the truth. | 我不过是说出真相而已 |
| [02:01] | Apologizing would be lying. | 要我道歉等于要我说谎 |
| [02:03] | Connie, you promised you’d make him stop. | 康妮 你答应过我你会制止他的 |
| [02:05] | Connie can’t help you now. | 康妮现在可帮不了你 |
| [02:09] | Eunice | 翻译 |
| [02:10] | Funky 高布丁Gwen 翻译 | |
| [02:11] | Santolalla 驴驴 翻译 | |
| [02:14] | 雷鸣 后期 | |
| [02:15] | Eunice | 总监 |
| [02:21] | I can’t believe Marc bullied his teacher. | 真不敢相信马科霸凌了他的老师 |
| [02:23] | Brains and cruelty? | 有脑子又够残忍 |
| [02:24] | I may have finally found a running mate. | 我可能终于找到了竞选伙伴 |
| [02:28] | I talked to him about it; he wasn’t trying to be a bully. | 我和他谈过 他不是想欺负人 |
| [02:32] | I think he’s just acting out because he’s bored | 他应该只是找点事做宣泄一下 因为他无聊 |
| [02:34] | and not being challenged at school. | 在学校受不到挑战 |
| [02:36] | You know, you guys acted out, too, but in different ways. | 其实你们也宣泄 只是方式不同 |
| [02:39] | Like when you grew human ears on the backs of mice | 比如你那次在老鼠背上种人耳朵 |
| [02:41] | so you could “play God.” | 为了扮演上帝 |
| [02:44] | Funny story, most of those mice went insane. | 说个好笑的 那些老鼠大部分都疯了 |
| [02:48] | This is a problem. | 这是个问题 |
| [02:49] | I don’t know how we can keep sending Marc to that school. | 我不知道如何能继续送马科去那里上学 |
| [02:52] | So, send him to ours. | 那就送他去我们学校啊 |
| [02:53] | They’ll accept anyone related to me sight unseen. | 只要和我有血缘关系 他们会毫不犹豫地接受 |
| [02:57] | We can’t afford a third kid in private school. | 我们可供不起第三个孩子上私立学校 |
| [03:00] | Money doesn’t just grow on the backs of mice like ears, Nicole. | 钱不会像人耳一样自己从老鼠背上长出来 妮可 |
| [03:04] | If he’s bored, can’t you just skip him a few grades | 如果他无聊 你们不能让他跳级几年吗 |
| [03:07] | so he’ll be more challenged? | 让他受到更大的挑战 |
| [03:08] | Oh, he is not emotionally mature enough for that. | 不行 他情感上不够成熟 |
| [03:10] | And how’s he gonna reach the urinals? | 再说他哪够得着小便器啊 |
| [03:13] | I guess he could stand back and arc it. | 估计他可以站远点 尿出道弧线 |
| [03:16] | What about sending Marc to Marlboro Charter? | 要不送马科去马尔堡特许学校 |
| [03:19] | They have a gifted program. | 他们有天才项目 |
| [03:20] | Jason Berger went there after our school kicked him out | 杰森·伯格被我们学校踢出来后就去了那里 |
| [03:22] | for using the robotics lab to build a girlfriend. | 因为他使用了机器人实验室造女朋友 |
| [03:26] | Oh, we have dinner with them on the 24th | 我们24号要跟他们一起吃晚饭 |
| [03:28] | to celebrate their anniversary. | 庆祝他们的周年纪念日 |
| [03:32] | What’s Marlboro Charter? Sounds expensive. | 马尔堡特许学校是什么 听起来很昂贵 |
| [03:34] | No, it’s free. | 不 那里免费 |
| [03:35] | It’s like a public school with a specialized… | 就像公立学校 但有专门的… |
| [03:37] | He stopped listening after “free.” | 他听见”免费”二字后就没再听了 |
| [03:40] | I stopped listening after you said you have a dinner date | 我听见你说要跟一个变态和他的机器人女友 |
| [03:43] | with a pervert and his robot girlfriend. | 一起吃晚饭后就没再听下去了 |
| [03:46] | From what he says, she’s the pervert. | 按他的说法 他们之间她才是变态 |
| [03:53] | And we think Marlboro Charter’s gifted program | 我们认为马尔堡特许学校的天才项目 |
| [03:55] | would be perfect for Marc. | 非常适合马科 |
| [03:57] | He wrote his first concerto when he was four | 他四岁那年写出他第一首协奏曲 |
| [03:59] | and then self-published a magazine | 然后自行出版了一本杂志 |
| [04:01] | that gave it a rave review. | 给那首曲子极高好评 |
| [04:03] | Well, it’s quite impressive. | 真厉害 |
| [04:05] | And while my little academic sandbox | 虽然我的教学沙坑 |
| [04:07] | is open to all qualified children in the district, | 开放给本地区所有符合资格的孩子 |
| [04:10] | I’m concerned about Marc’s history of bullying. | 但我有点担心马科的霸凌历史 |
| [04:14] | I understand. | 我理解 |
| [04:15] | But that was just a one-time thing. | 但那个错误仅此一次 |
| [04:17] | The class is a little slow for him, | 他班上的进度对他来说慢了些 |
| [04:19] | so he’s bored and acting out. | 他觉得无聊所以才宣泄一下 |
| [04:21] | Interesting. “He’s bored and acting out.” | 有意思 “无聊所以宣泄一下” |
| [04:24] | Tell me, was that also your excuse | 告诉我 这也是你当年 |
| [04:27] | back when you bullied me? | 霸凌我的理由吗 |
| [04:32] | I’m sorry, when I…? | 不好意思 我当年… |
| [04:35] | I could tell you didn’t recognize me. | 我看出来你没认出我了 |
| [04:36] | Ventnor High, we graduated together? | 文特诺中学 我们是同一届毕业的 |
| [04:40] | Oh, my God! Yes, yes, of course. | 天啊 对 对 是你 |
| [04:43] | Dr. Walker. How are you? | 沃克博士 你好吗 |
| [04:47] | You were the architect | 我人生最羞耻的时刻 |
| [04:48] | of the most humiliating moment of my life. | 就是你亲手缔造的 |
| [04:52] | Well, how have you been since then? | 那你从那之后过得好吗 |
| [04:55] | I can’t believe Marc’s bullying was a one-time thing. | 我无法相信马科的霸凌行为仅此一次 |
| [04:58] | The apple rarely falls far from the tree. | 苹果通常都落在树跟前[有其母必有其子] |
| [05:01] | Are you kidding me? | 开什么玩笑 |
| [05:02] | That apple fell so far from the tree, | 他这颗果子落得也太远了 |
| [05:04] | I wouldn’t believe it’s our apple | 如果没有亲眼看见树把果子扔出去 |
| [05:06] | if I didn’t see the tree push it out with my own eyes. | 我都不信这是我家的果子 |
| [05:11] | Marlboro appreciates your interest. | 马尔堡感谢两位的青睐 |
| [05:13] | I’ll pass Marc’s application on to my colleague. | 我会把马科的申请资料给同事过目的 |
| [05:22] | Well, thank you both for your time. | 谢谢您二位的宝贵时间 |
| [05:30] | Well, there goes any shot of getting into Marlboro. | 去马尔堡上学算是没戏了 |
| [05:33] | That guy really hates you. | 那家伙是真恨你啊 |
| [05:37] | I mean, that shredder was brand-new. | 他的碎纸机是崭新的 |
| [05:40] | I feel like he bought it just for that meeting. | 我感觉他是特地为跟我们见面买的 |
| [05:43] | I don’t even know what he was talking about. | 我根本不知道他在说什么 |
| [05:45] | I wasn’t a bully in high school. | 我上高中的时候才不是恶霸 |
| [05:47] | I played a few pranks. | 我只是爱弄些恶作剧 |
| [05:49] | I was voted class clown. | 我还被大家选为班级小丑 |
| [05:51] | Sure, but clowns aren’t always funny. | 没错 可小丑有时也不好笑 |
| [05:54] | I mean, the most popular ones terrorize Gotham | 比如威震哥谭的那位 |
| [05:57] | or live in the sewer and eat children. | 还有躲在下水道里吃小孩的那位 |
| [06:03] | How did it go at the school? | 跟学校谈得怎么样 |
| [06:05] | Uh, great, buddy. Yeah. We-we should hear soon. | 谈得很好 应该很快就能收到答复了 |
| [06:08] | I’m hopeful it works out. | 我很希望能顺利录取 |
| [06:14] | Did you see that? | 你看到没 |
| [06:15] | I’ve never seen him that amped up about anything. | 我从没见过他对什么事那么上心 |
| [06:17] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [06:19] | I know. I got to fix things with Walker. | 我知道 我必须找沃克把这件事摆平 |
| [06:21] | So we’ll-we’ll just call him and apologize. | 我们给他打电话道歉就行了 |
| [06:23] | That’s perfect. | 完美 |
| [06:24] | Except for I have no idea who he is or what I did to him. | 可我不知道他是谁 我对他干了什么 |
| [06:28] | I got to figure this out. | 我得把这件事弄清楚 |
| [06:29] | Someone has to remember him. | 一定有人还记得他 |
| [06:31] | I don’t remember him. | 我可不记得他 |
| [06:34] | Wait. Was this the guy you stapled into the mascot outfit? | 等等 是被你钉在吉祥物套装里的那个人吗 |
| [06:38] | No, that was John Norwood. | 不是 那是约翰·诺伍德 |
| [06:41] | What about the dude whose deodorant | 是不是被你把除臭剂 |
| [06:43] | you switched for spray glue? | 换成喷胶的那个人 |
| [06:46] | Ryan Farley. | 那是瑞安·法利 |
| [06:47] | And how was I supposed to know | 而且我怎么知道 |
| [06:48] | he sprayed deodorant down there? | 他会往裤裆里喷除臭剂 |
| [06:51] | Who does that? | 谁会这么做 |
| [06:52] | – What? – No one. | -奇葩 -没人这样 |
| [06:54] | That’s crazy. | 丧心病狂 |
| [06:55] | Okay, okay… | 好吧 好吧 |
| [06:57] | What was the name of the flat-assed guy | 返校日被你扔进储物柜的那个 |
| [06:59] | you shoved into the locker during homecoming? | 扁屁股的家伙叫什么来着 |
| [07:03] | His name was Mike. | 他叫麦克 |
| [07:04] | Mike Bennett. She married him. | 麦克·本奈特 她老公 |
| [07:08] | You know, the more we talk about all the stuff I did, | 我们越聊我之前干的事 |
| [07:11] | it sounds more mean than fun. | 我听着越觉得可恶 而不是好笑 |
| [07:14] | Was I just a bully in high school? | 我上高中的时候真的是个恶霸吗 |
| [07:16] | No… no, babe. | 不是 不是 亲爱的 |
| [07:18] | You just– you did some… | 你只是一个 |
| [07:21] | cruel things at the expense of other people’s confidence | 心狠手辣 把别人收集白色牛仔裤的信心 |
| [07:24] | in their white jean collection. | 踩在脚下的人 |
| [07:27] | Wow, Mike. You found the only thing | 麦克 你说的还真是 |
| [07:29] | that a white guy can’t get away with. | 白人男心里唯一过不去的那件事 |
| [07:34] | So Walker was right. | 麦克说得没错 |
| [07:35] | I am the jerk tree, | 我就是那棵坏树 |
| [07:37] | and Marc is the apple that didn’t fall far from me. | 马科就是那颗随了我的坏果子 |
| [07:41] | Maybe you were a tree on the jerky side, | 也许你过去曾经有可恶的一面 |
| [07:44] | but you’re a different person now. | 但你现在重新做人了 |
| [07:47] | Pancake-Ass is right. | 扁屁男说得没错 |
| [07:50] | Why don’t you just show this Walker guy that you changed. | 要不你干脆让这个沃克看看你的改变 |
| [07:53] | Uh, invite him over for dinner or something. | 比如邀请他来吃晚餐什么的 |
| [07:55] | Yeah, or do what you did to us: | 是啊 或者和对我们一样 |
| [07:57] | invite him over for beer and pizza, | 请人家来喝啤酒吃披萨 |
| [07:59] | and then talk about stuff he can’t even contribute to | 然后聊一些人家根本搭不上话的事情 |
| [08:01] | because he went to a different high school, Kay! | 因为人家跟你上的不是同一所中学 凯 |
| [08:04] | All right, you know what? Let’s give it a try. | 好吧 就这么做 我们试试看 |
| [08:06] | We’ll roll out the red carpet. | 我们欢迎他大驾光临[铺开红地毯] |
| [08:08] | Oh! Was Walker the guy you rolled in that carpet? | 沃克是被你卷进地毯的那个人吗 |
| [08:12] | No-no-no-no-no. | 不不不 |
| [08:14] | Also me. | 那个也是我 |
| [08:20] | Walker just e-mailed back. | 沃克回复了我的邮件 |
| [08:22] | He is in for dinner tomorrow. | 他答应了明天来吃晚饭 |
| [08:24] | But he said his “girlfriend” can’t make it. | 但他说他的”女友”无法到场 |
| [08:27] | Weirdly, he’s the one who put “girlfriend” in quotes. | 奇怪的是 是他自己把”女友”用引号括起来的 |
| [08:32] | Great. Did he mention any food allergies? | 好极了 他说没说对什么食物过敏 |
| [08:34] | ‘Cause we throw a couple nuts in his salad, | 要是我们往他的沙拉里加一些坚果 |
| [08:35] | next thing you know, we’re saving his life | 说不定他就会过敏 我们就可以趁机救他一命 |
| [08:37] | and he owes us. | 让他欠我们一个大人情 |
| [08:41] | Oh. Hey, buddy. | 你怎么在这儿 |
| [08:42] | What did we say about you and lurking? | 我们之前怎么跟你说藏着偷听这事的 |
| [08:45] | Don’t get caught. | 别被发现 |
| [08:47] | Maybe now’s a good time to talk to your apple. | 或许现在是和你的小苹果沟通的好时机 |
| [08:50] | Hey, sweetie. | 宝贝 |
| [08:53] | Here. Sit. | 过来 坐 |
| [08:54] | You know, I’ve been thinking about all the stuff I did | 我最近回想起上学时做过的所有事 |
| [08:57] | when I was in school, and you know what I realize? | 你知道我从中意识到什么吗 |
| [09:00] | It is never okay to bully. | 无论何时 霸凌都是不对的 |
| [09:03] | Well, actually… | 其实… |
| [09:04] | I hate when they start sentences like that. | 每次有人以这个词开场 我就很反感 |
| [09:07] | I recently read an article that I wrote | 最近我读了一篇文章 也是我写的 |
| [09:09] | that highlights the sociopolitical benefits | 文中强调贬低身边的弱者 |
| [09:12] | of diminishing the weakest among us. | 对社会与政治的诸多好处 |
| [09:14] | From an evolutionary standpoint, ineptitude should be ridiculed, | 从进化论的角度来说 无能之人就该被嘲笑 |
| [09:18] | as to discourage that trait from the species. | 那样可以抑制物种落后的特性 |
| [09:22] | Does everything have to be a nature documentary? | 难道每件事都要说成自然纪录片那样吗 |
| [09:25] | Just be kind to people, even if they’re dumber than you. | 总之友善待人 即便他们比你们笨 |
| [09:30] | So, based on that premise, | 照你这么说 |
| [09:32] | I should be extra nice to Brian. | 我应该对布莱恩格外好一些 |
| [09:36] | What a beautiful sentiment from my brilliant | 看我头脑聪明 长相对称的妹妹提出了一个 |
| [09:38] | and symmetrically-featured sister. | 多么优秀的想法 |
| [09:40] | In case your lackluster intelligence isn’t following, | 为了防止你那点智商跟不上我的节奏 |
| [09:43] | it is I who am being nice because… | 我就明说了 是我要对你友好一点 因为… |
| [09:46] | because of what Mom said. | 因为妈妈说的那句话 |
| [09:49] | Interesting. | 真有意思 |
| [09:50] | They’re being nice to be mean. | 为了毒舌攻击对方 他们假装友善 |
| [09:55] | – No, no-no-no-no-no, don’t learn this. – Guys, | -不 你不要跟他们学 -孩子们 |
| [09:58] | niceness is not a weapon, okay? | 友善不是你们互相攻击的武器好吗 |
| [10:01] | It makes the world a better place, | 待人友善让世界变得更美好 |
| [10:03] | and also, it’s a great way to hedge your bet | 也可以削减你们下地狱的风险 |
| [10:05] | in case there really is a heaven. | 万一真的有天堂的话 |
| [10:08] | So just put your egos aside and-and just, | 总之把你们自我的性子都收一收 |
| [10:10] | you know… be good. | 友善待人 |
| [10:13] | Forever. | 一直如此 |
| [10:15] | Yes! | 没错 |
| [10:16] | Definitely forever. But especially tomorrow. | 要一直友善 尤其是明天 |
| [10:20] | Because Marc’s academic life hangs in the balance, | 因为马科上学的问题还悬而未决 |
| [10:23] | and we have to prove | 我们要证明 |
| [10:24] | that we are a warm, loving family, | 我们是一个温暖 充满爱的大家庭 |
| [10:26] | and not just a bunch of bullies. | 而不是一群恶霸 |
| [10:29] | Hey, Dad, can I borrow your hammer? | 爸爸 我能借你的锤子用用吗 |
| [10:31] | My imaginary friend needs to be taught a lesson. | 我得教训教训我想象中的朋友 |
| [10:41] | Hey, what do you think? | 感觉怎么样 |
| [10:42] | Pretty clean, right? | 挺干净的 对吧 |
| [10:44] | I mean, I had to drill the closet door shut | 我把壁橱的门钉上了 |
| [10:46] | ’cause it wouldn’t stay. But that’s for tomorrow us. | 因为它总是关不上 可以明天再解决它 |
| [10:49] | Nice. Look what I got. | 很好 看我拿着什么 |
| [10:51] | Nothing says “warm, kind home” like a welcome mat. | 没有什么比一块门垫更能体现家的温馨 |
| [10:55] | Good news, it was on sale. | 好消息是 门垫有打折 |
| [10:57] | Bad news, it says “Welcome to our ho ho home.” | 坏消息是 上面写着”欢迎来我们家共度圣诞” |
| [11:01] | That’s perfect. He’s gonna think | 非常好 这样他会认为 |
| [11:03] | we’re year-round Christmas people. | 我们是全年都处在圣诞欢乐氛围的人 |
| [11:04] | Those freaks are nice to a fault. | 那些怪咖友善到离谱 |
| [11:07] | Mom, your deceitful daughter plagiarized my look for the night. | 妈 你的撒谎精女儿抄袭了我今晚的打扮 |
| [11:12] | Plagiarized? You took that turtleneck out of my drawer. | 抄袭 这件高领衫是你从我抽屉里拿的 |
| [11:15] | What happened to you two out-nice’ing each other? | 你俩不是要跟对方比谁更友善吗 |
| [11:17] | That tiresome charade ran its course. | 那无聊的把戏我们已经玩腻了 |
| [11:19] | Yeah, it got weird when Nicole tried to draw me a bath. | 妮可要给我放洗澡水时我就恶心得演不下去 |
| [11:22] | Okay, Walker is going to be here any minute. | 沃克马上就要到了 |
| [11:25] | I don’t have time for your your fighting | 我现在没时间 |
| [11:26] | and competing right now. | 搭理你们之间的争斗 |
| [11:27] | Nicole gets the turtleneck, Brian gets the khakis, | 妮可穿高领衫 布莱恩穿卡其裤 |
| [11:30] | no one gets a bath. | 谁都不许泡澡 |
| [11:34] | Why can’t they ever just make anything easy? | 为什么他们每件事都搞得那么复杂 |
| [11:37] | Isn’t it obvious? | 这不很明显吗 |
| [11:38] | I was a bully, and now I’m raising an army of bullies. | 我曾经就是恶霸 现在我养出了一军队恶霸 |
| [11:41] | Well, I don’t know about an army. | 军队我说不好 |
| [11:43] | I’d say maybe an elite task force. | 我觉得应该是一支精英特遣队 |
| [11:46] | I was just worried about Marc, but it’s all of them. | 我本来只是担心马科 但现在每个都担心 |
| [11:49] | It’s like my mean DNA combined with their brains | 就像是我刻薄的DNA和他们聪慧的大脑 |
| [11:52] | makes them bullying supersoldiers. | 混在一起把他们变成了欺负人的超级士兵 |
| [11:56] | Well, we can’t count on the kids, so it’s just gonna be | 既然不能指望孩子们 那今晚 |
| [11:59] | up to us tonight to make sure that-that we’re nice. | 就得靠我们表现出友善的一面 |
| [12:02] | Okay, you know you’re already, like, professionally nice, | 你的友善已经是专业级别的了 |
| [12:04] | so you’re just saying that to remind me. | 你这么说只是在提醒我 |
| [12:06] | – What? – Do you not think I’m nice? | -什么 -你觉得我不友善吗 |
| [12:08] | Yeah, of course you’re nice, babe. | 你当然很友善啊 宝贝 |
| [12:10] | Yeah– I’m just, I’m saying, you know, it never hurts to, uh, | 我只是说 更友善些 |
| [12:13] | – be more nice. – What the hell is more nice? | -没坏处 -什么是再友善些 |
| [12:15] | Not this. | 现在这样就不是 |
| [12:17] | Great. Now I’m all in my head about “more nice.” | 好极了 现在我满脑子都是”更友善些” |
| [12:20] | You know, I’m gonna “more nice” your head right up your… | 我要”更友善”地把你脑袋塞进你的屁… |
| [12:23] | Hey, you! | 嗨 你来啦 |
| [12:25] | Get in here. | 快请进 |
| [12:27] | I’m a hugger. Oh. | 拥抱一下吧 |
| [12:29] | Careful, I have a soft spine. | 小心点 我脊椎很脆弱 |
| [12:33] | This is a very quaint home. | 你家真古色古香 |
| [12:35] | Shoes on, I assume. | 我猜不用脱鞋吧 |
| [12:37] | Dr. Walker, thank you for coming. | 沃克博士 感谢你的光临 |
| [12:40] | We’re sorry your girlfriend couldn’t make it. | 很抱歉你女朋友没能一起来 |
| [12:42] | Ah. Yes, well, actually, we broke up. | 是的 实际上 我们分手了 |
| [12:45] | My decision. | 我的决定 |
| [12:46] | And don’t try calling her; she doesn’t have a phone. | 别给她打电话了 她没有手机 |
| [12:49] | Please come in. Let me introduce you to the family. | 快请进 让我介绍家人给你认识 |
| [12:52] | Um, t-this here is Leila. | 这是蕾拉 |
| [12:54] | And of course, this is Marc– | 当然了 这就是马科 |
| [12:56] | come here, buddy– the man of the hour. | 过来 孩子 我们今天的主角 |
| [12:58] | – Enchanté, Marc. – Enchanté, aussi. | -很高兴认识你 马科 -我也是 |
| [13:01] | Oh, French. | 法语啊 |
| [13:03] | The language of France. | 法国的语言 |
| [13:06] | Okay. | 好了 |
| [13:09] | And these are our other two gifted children Brian and Nicole. | 这是我们另外两个天赋异禀的孩子布莱恩和妮可 |
| [13:14] | – Enchanté. – Enchanté. | -很高兴认识你 -很高兴认识你 |
| [13:16] | – Enchanté. – Enchanté. | -很高兴认识你 -很高兴认识你 |
| [13:18] | Actually, | 实际上 |
| [13:18] | I think you can help us. | 你应该能帮到我们 |
| [13:20] | My brother and I were having an intellectual debate. | 我和我哥哥正在进行智力辩论 |
| [13:22] | Is there any other kind? | 辩论不就只有这一种吗 |
| [13:25] | How droll. | 真逗 |
| [13:26] | As an academic evaluator, | 作为学业评估人 |
| [13:28] | you are uniquely qualified to settle something for us. | 只有你有资格帮我们解决这件事 |
| [13:32] | Uh, we don’t need to bother Dr. Walker with… | 我们不用麻烦沃克博士了吧 |
| [13:33] | We could show you our résumés, | 我们可以把简历给你看 |
| [13:35] | drone on about our commendations, | 大谈我们得过的奖状 |
| [13:37] | but let’s dismiss the formalities. | 但让我们省掉这些繁文缛节 |
| [13:39] | You’ve seen enough. | 你已经见过足够多了 |
| [13:40] | Decide: who is drawing whom a bath? | 你来决定 我们谁该给对方放洗澡水 |
| [13:45] | Come again? | 你说什么 |
| [13:46] | Who is drawing whom… | 谁该给对方… |
| [13:48] | Okay. Why don’t, why don’t we, uh, | 好了 你们不如 不如… |
| [13:50] | go upstairs and, uh, and change our clothes… | 上楼 换身衣服 |
| [13:54] | and our personalities? | 并改变下人格 |
| [13:56] | Okay. So the kids enchantéd the bed. | 好了 孩子们已经铺好前奏 |
| [14:00] | I think it’s time to pull the trigger and say you’re sorry. | 现在该你向他道歉了 |
| [14:02] | Ah, yeah. There’s one problem– same problem– | 是的 还有个问题 同样的问题 |
| [14:05] | – I don’t remember him. – Right. | -我不记得他 -是的 |
| [14:07] | Okay. Okay, I-I got this. | 好的 好的 让我来 |
| [14:10] | So, Dr. Walker, tell me about yourself. | 沃克博士 跟我说说你自己 |
| [14:13] | D-Did you play any sports in high school? | 你在高中玩什么运动 |
| [14:16] | No, I was not a sporting man. | 不 我不是运动型男人 |
| [14:18] | The only team I cheered for was the team of physicians | 我唯一支持的队伍就是试图治好我的 |
| [14:21] | trying to rectify my calcium deficiency. | 钙质缺乏的内科医生团队 |
| [14:23] | I drank an obscene amount of milk. | 我喝了非常多的牛奶 |
| [14:25] | Cool, cool. That seems like a memorable characteristic, | 很好 很好 那真是个让人”记忆深刻”的特质 |
| [14:30] | just a sick dude chugging milk all the time? | 一个总是在喝奶的瘦弱家伙 |
| [14:35] | What is this? | 搞什么 |
| [14:37] | No, no, no. Uh, we’re-we’re not… | 不 不是 我们不是 |
| [14:38] | I had my reservations about tonight. | 我本来对今晚有保留意见 |
| [14:40] | Now I see you brought me here only to mock me. | 现在我知道你们让我过来就是为了嘲笑我 |
| [14:44] | My girlfriend was right. I shouldn’t have come. | 我女朋友说得对 我根本不该来 |
| [14:47] | I thought you broke up. | 你们不是分手了吗 |
| [14:49] | This is a new one. | 我有新女朋友 |
| [14:51] | She also has no phone. I should be going. | 她也没有手机 我该走了 |
| [14:54] | No– Dr. Walker, wait. | 不 沃克博士 请留步 |
| [14:56] | I realize now that I was not a good person in high school. | 我现在意识到了我在高中并不是个很好的人 |
| [15:00] | I feel terrible about the things I did back then, | 我很抱歉我曾做过那些事 |
| [15:03] | and I wish I could apologize for what I did to you. | 我希望我可以为我曾对你做过的事道歉 |
| [15:09] | But the truth is, I don’t even remember what it was. | 但事实是 我根本不记得我做了什么 |
| [15:12] | Well, I appreciate your candor. | 感谢你的坦白 |
| [15:15] | I wish it were only so easy for me to forget about that election speech. | 我希望我也能如此轻易忘掉那场竞选演讲 |
| [15:20] | Election speech. | 竞选演讲 |
| [15:23] | You’re Andy Walker. | 你是安迪·沃克 |
| [15:28] | And I owe you an apology. | 我欠你一个道歉 |
| [15:32] | Would you, um… | 能否… |
| [15:36] | excuse me? | 失陪一下 |
| [15:39] | Uh, I’m just gonna go help her for a minute. | 我去帮她一下 |
| [15:42] | – What is going on? – I remember Walker. | -怎么回事 -我记得沃克 |
| [15:45] | Senior year, right before his student council speech, | 高三 就在他学生会演讲之前 |
| [15:48] | I slipped a bottle of laxatives into his prescription soup. | 我在他的处方药剂里倒了一瓶泻药 |
| [15:52] | Walker was the kid that dumped out in front of the school. | 沃克就是那个在全校面前喷屎的学生 |
| [15:54] | I remember that. | 我记得这事 |
| [15:56] | They had to replace the whole stage. | 他们不得不换掉了整个舞台 |
| [15:58] | But this is great. Now you can really apologize. | 这很好 现在你可以真正的道歉了 |
| [16:00] | No, I can’t. I will never ever apologize to that guy. | 不 我不能 我永远不会对他道歉的 |
| [16:05] | Well, drink up. Usually after the second glass, | 快喝 一般喝完第二杯 |
| [16:07] | you’re more up to try things you first said no to. | 你会更愿意尝试些你之前拒绝的事情 |
| [16:13] | Why won’t you tell this guy you’re sorry? | 你为什么不愿意对他道歉 |
| [16:15] | Look, I feel bad about a lot of stuff I did back then, but not that. | 我对之前做过的很多事都感到抱歉 但这事没有 |
| [16:19] | That was not bullying, it was standing up for a friend. | 那不是霸凌 是替朋友挺身而出 |
| [16:22] | My only regret is I didn’t use more laxatives. | 我唯一后悔的是没给他下更多泻药 |
| [16:26] | But I needed to fit into my prom dress. | 因为剩下的我自己要吃 为了穿上舞会裙子 |
| [16:30] | – But again… – The guy was a huge creep. | -但是… -那家伙是个大变态 |
| [16:32] | He had a crush on my friend Heather, and she just didn’t like him back, | 他暗恋我朋友海瑟 她只是不喜欢他 |
| [16:36] | so he lied about her cheating off him | 他就撒谎说她作弊抄袭他 |
| [16:38] | and got her kicked out of school. | 害她被学校开除 |
| [16:41] | Whoa, that guy did that? | 那个人做过那种事吗 |
| [16:43] | Okay, they might get the bullying from me, | 好了 他们霸凌这点也许是遗传我 |
| [16:44] | but they get the lurking from you. | 但他们藏在角落偷听这点是遗传你 |
| [16:48] | Yes. | 是的 |
| [16:48] | Your mom needs to say she’s sorry to this guy. | 你们的妈妈得跟这个人道歉 |
| [16:51] | But it sounds like she was right. | 但听起来她当时做得没错啊 |
| [16:53] | She shouldn’t have to apologize. | 她不应该道歉 |
| [16:57] | Ugh, I have to be a parent right now, don’t I? | 我现在必须要扮演家长的角色 对不对 |
| [17:01] | Your dad has a point. | 你们的爸爸说得有道理 |
| [17:03] | What I did was wrong, | 我当时做错了 |
| [17:04] | and it is never okay to treat someone like that. | 无论如何都不能那么对待别人 |
| [17:08] | So I should own up to it. | 所以我应该承认错误 |
| [17:10] | Even though I was right and I don’t want to. | 即使我当时做得对 还有我不想道歉 |
| [17:14] | And then Neil deGrasse Tyson said, | 然后天文学家奈尔·德葛拉司·泰森说 |
| [17:17] | “Give me some time.” | “给我一点时间” |
| [17:18] | And I said, “What is time?” and, oh, did we laugh. | 然后我问 “时间是什么” 我们就笑坏了 |
| [17:23] | Well, I laughed. | 至少我笑了 |
| [17:25] | He was very far away. | 他已经陷入沉思 |
| [17:29] | Can I go to bed? | 我能去睡觉了吗 |
| [17:32] | Dr. Walker, I just want to finish what I was saying before. | 沃克博士 我想把刚才的话说完 |
| [17:37] | I am… sorry for what I did to you. | 我为我当时的行为向你道歉 |
| [17:42] | It was, uh… | 那非常… |
| [17:43] | Cruel, childish and unjustified? | 残忍 幼稚 不正当吗 |
| [17:46] | Those are three things. | 有你说的那三点 |
| [17:50] | And for whatever reasons I thought I had, | 无论我当时认为自己持有何种理由 |
| [17:52] | I see now that… | 我现在明白… |
| [17:54] | You did it because you were jealous of my success and intelligence. | 你那么做是因为你嫉妒我的成功和智慧 |
| [17:59] | The important thing is that Marc is a great kid. | 重要的是 马科是个好孩子 |
| [18:03] | All of my kids are great kids, | 我所有的孩子都是好孩子 |
| [18:05] | and I have done my best to set a good example for all of them. | 我已经尽我所能 为他们做个好榜样 |
| [18:10] | Well, at least you have the self-awareness | 至少你认识到 |
| [18:12] | to make yourself a cautionary tale for your children. | 你可以给你的孩子们做个反面典型 |
| [18:16] | Though you must appreciate the irony. | 不过你一定也看到这件事的讽刺之处了 |
| [18:20] | You, once so powerful and popular, | 你曾经那么强大 那么受欢迎 |
| [18:23] | now reduced to working at a second-rate casino, | 现在却沦落在一家二流赌场工作 |
| [18:27] | pleading for my help like a squirrel trapped in a garden rake. | 像一只困在公园耙子下的松鼠 乞求我的帮助 |
| [18:30] | Okay. Okay, ho– That is my squirrel. | 好了 好了 那可是我的松鼠 |
| [18:35] | – Mike, it’s fine. – It is fine. | -麦克 没事 -的确没事了 |
| [18:38] | I graciously accept your apology. | 我大度地接受你的道歉 |
| [18:42] | Justice has been served. | 正义得到了伸张 |
| [18:43] | All is right in the world. | 这世界一切都好 |
| [18:47] | You’re a dick. | 你是个混蛋 |
| [18:52] | – Leila. – She’s right. | -蕾拉 -她说得没错 |
| [18:53] | No one can talk to our mother like that. | 没人能那么跟我妈妈说话 |
| [18:55] | Especially not some pedantic pseudo-intellectual. | 尤其是某个卖弄学问的伪知识分子 |
| [18:58] | Pseudo? I have an IQ of 135. | 伪知识分子 我的智商高达135呢 |
| [19:04] | I can’t believe you’d admit that. | 这么低你都好意思承认 |
| [19:08] | So, you’re just a whole family full of bullies. | 所以 你们全家都是恶霸 |
| [19:11] | I guess some things never change. | 看来本性难移 |
| [19:13] | You should know. | 你应该知道 |
| [19:14] | Becoming an educator is a transparent attempt | 你成为一位教育工作者 明显是为了 |
| [19:17] | to wield power in an environment where you once felt so impotent. | 在你曾经感到无力[阳痿]的环境中行使权力 |
| [19:20] | What know you of my impotence? | 你怎么知道我阳痿的 |
| [19:24] | Your words mean nothing. | 你的话对我毫无意义 |
| [19:25] | “Let them speak lewdly of me, what am I the worse?” | “让他们用言语羞辱我吧 还能有多糟” |
| [19:27] | Sir Thomas More. | 这是政治家托马斯·莫尔爵士说的 |
| [19:29] | More like Sir Thomas Snore. | 我看是托马斯·打鼾爵士吧 |
| [19:40] | I’ll be going. | 我要走了 |
| [19:41] | Marc, it seems like you’re the only decent one of the bunch. | 马科 看来你是这些人里唯一言行得体的 |
| [19:47] | Wait. | 等一下 |
| [19:58] | Sir Thomas More was a damned fool. | 托马斯·莫尔爵士就是个蠢蛋 |
| [20:05] | What did you say to him? | 你跟他说什么了 |
| [20:07] | Just enough. | 恰到好处地补了一刀而已 |
| [20:11] | Again, I am so sorry for all of the mean things | 我为我高中时对你说过和做过的坏事 |
| [20:14] | I said and did to you in high school. | 再次向你道歉 |
| [20:17] | Thanks. It was nice talking to you, too. | 谢谢 跟你谈话我也很高兴 |
| [20:21] | Jerry Weenus accepted my apology. | 杰瑞·温尼斯接受了我的道歉 |
| [20:24] | Another burned bridge rebuilt– | 又重建一座友谊之桥 |
| [20:26] | – And what are you wearing? Oh. – These? | -你穿的这是什么鬼 -这个吗 |
| [20:30] | Well, I figured, now that we are officially a bully-free ho ho home, | 既然现在我们正式成为无霸凌圣诞之家了 |
| [20:34] | I am free to be me. | 我可以自由做自己了 |
| [20:36] | And I can’t say anything about it. | 我不能有任何评论 |
| [20:40] | No, you cannot. | 没错 你不能 |
| [20:41] | You just got to watch me walk. | 你只能看着我到处晃 |
| [20:45] | Okay, the jeans don’t want to sit. | 好吧 这裤子不适合坐下 |
| [20:48] | Announcing entrance. | 我要进来了 |
| [20:50] | Sweetie, we are so sorry about Marlboro. | 亲爱的 对不起 没能让你进马尔堡 |
| [20:53] | But don’t worry, we are gonna come up with another plan. | 但别担心 我们会想出其他办法的 |
| [20:56] | It’s okay. I’m going to apologize to my teacher. | 没事 我会去向我的老师道歉 |
| [20:59] | You are? | 真的吗 |
| [21:00] | If you could be nice to a jerk like Dr. Walker for me, | 如果你们可以为了我 对沃克博士那种混蛋友好 |
| [21:02] | I can be nice to my teacher for you. | 我也能为你们对我的老师友好 |
| [21:04] | It’s not his fault he went to Dartmouth. | 他上的达特茅斯学院又不是他的错 |
| [21:08] | Wow, that is really mature of you, buddy. | 你真的很成熟啊 小子 |
| [21:10] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [21:12] | Maybe even like seventh grade mature. | 这也许有七年级那么成熟了 |
| [21:16] | Then we have two drop offs | 那我们送孩子们上学就要去两个地方了 |
| [21:17] | Sixth it is. | 还是上六年级吧 |
| [21:19] | Hey, Jelly bean. What are you doing? | 小可爱 你要去干什么 |
| [21:21] | I’m goning to dig in the backyard. | 我要去后院挖坑 |
| [21:23] | Oh, you you are planting something? | 你是想种什么东西吗 |
| [21:25] | Sort of. Let’s just say | 算是吧 这么说吧 |
| [21:27] | that you won’t be seen my imaginary friend around here anymore. | 你们再也不会看到我想象中的好友了 |