| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [01:49] | I lost a sock and a pair of shorts, | 我丢了一只袜子和一条短裤 |
| [01:51] | but the fuck if I’m going back down there with the crypt-master. | 但有个地穴恶魔在下面 我绝对不要再下去了 |
| [01:57] | – Ben? – Uh, yeah? | -本 -什么事 |
| [01:59] | I… I said there was this guy down there. This… | 我…我刚说楼下有个人 |
| [02:03] | This in… credibly hot guy. And I was… | 一个超级正点的家伙 我… |
| [02:06] | I was bending over to get my laundry out of the dryer, | 我弯腰从烘干机里取衣服时 |
| [02:09] | and… and he ripped off my pants | 他脱了我的裤子 |
| [02:11] | and he fucked the shit out of me. | 然后狠狠地操我 |
| [02:14] | Uh-huh? | 是吗 |
| [02:20] | Hey, hey, what… what are you doing? | 嘿 你在干什么呢 |
| [02:22] | I’m reading the newspaper and I’m near-sighted | 我在看报纸呢 而且我近视 |
| [02:24] | so I… oh, the classifieds. Oh… | 是分类广告啊 |
| [02:26] | Yeah, I’m looking for an apartment, Michael. | 是的 我在找公寓 迈克 |
| [02:29] | You already have an apartment, | 可你已经有公寓了 |
| [02:31] | complete with appliances and hardwood floors, | 配有电器 铺了木地板 |
| [02:33] | – and a built-in boyfriend… – Yeah, I told you, | -还内置一个男朋友 -我说过了 |
| [02:35] | I-I think it’s best if I have my own place. Yeah. | 我最好还是自己找个地方住 |
| [02:37] | And I think it’s best… that you stay. | 我觉得最好你还是留下来 |
| [02:51] | Are you sure you wouldn’t rather be out with Brian? | 你确定你不是宁愿和布莱恩一起出去玩吗 |
| [02:58] | Well, I have to admit, it is tempting. | 我必须承认那很有诱惑力 |
| [03:02] | But then, I would miss out on all the pre-soaking, | 不过那样的话 我就会错过浸泡衣服 |
| [03:07] | and spin-drying, and not to mention, | 和脱水烘干的过程 更不用说 |
| [03:09] | having the hottest man in Pittsburgh | 还有个匹兹堡最帅的男人 |
| [03:12] | to help me fluff ‘n’ fold. | 帮我折叠衣服 |
| [03:23] | Help you with the Center Carnival? | 帮你筹备同志中心的嘉年华 |
| [03:25] | Are you out of your fucking mind? | 你脑子进水了吧 |
| [03:26] | I like to think not. | 我觉得没有 |
| [03:28] | After the way they screwed me, | 他们都把我干趴下了 |
| [03:29] | the only thing I’d like to help the center do is self-destruct. | 我现在只想帮他们自我毁灭 |
| [03:31] | Well, that’s exactly what might happen | 要是我们拉不到企业赞助 |
| [03:33] | if we don’t boost our corporate sponsorship and raise a couple 100,000. | 筹不到几十万的话 中心确实会完蛋 |
| [03:36] | It’s not my problem. | 不关我的事 |
| [03:49] | Anyone else in there I should know about? | 房间里还有谁在 我应该知道一下吗 |
| [03:52] | Uh, hopefully not before I do. | 就我所知 没有 |
| [03:53] | Look, it may not be your problem. | 听我说 也许这事跟你没关系 |
| [03:55] | But it’d be a very big problem | 可如果我们被迫削减 |
| [03:57] | for a lot of members of our community | 艾滋临终安养院 |
| [03:58] | if we had to cut on AIDS hospice care | 和流浪少年救助站的经费 |
| [03:59] | or the homeless teen shelter. | 将关系到群体里的很多人 |
| [04:01] | All I’m asking | 我只是希望 |
| [04:02] | is for you to volunteer a few hours of your time | 你能抽一点时间 |
| [04:04] | to help organize this fundraiser. | 来帮忙组织这个筹款宴会 |
| [04:06] | Maybe call a few of your clients | 比如联系下你的几位客户 |
| [04:07] | and see if they’d be willing to contribute. | 看他们愿不愿意捐点钱 |
| [04:09] | Oh, I-I don’t do volunteer work. | 我从来不做义工 |
| [04:11] | Oh, thanks a lot, Brian. | 那真是谢谢了 布莱恩 |
| [04:14] | Hope I didn’t keep you from attending to more important things. | 但愿没耽误你”做”更重要的事 |
| [04:19] | However, the center and I may be able to come to some more… | 不过 中心可以跟我订立一个 |
| [04:23] | amenable… agreement? | 更合理一些的协议 |
| [04:27] | There is no way we’re working with him. | 我们不可能跟他合作的 |
| [04:29] | It’s out of the question. | 绝不可能 |
| [04:30] | I understand your reluctance to get involved. | 我知道你们不想跟他合作 |
| [04:32] | However, if he’s willing to put past hostilities aside, | 可如果他都愿意不计前嫌 |
| [04:35] | I say we should do the same. | 我们也应该这么做 |
| [04:37] | Just what exactly is Mr. Kinney offering to do? | 那肯尼先生到底能帮什么忙呢 |
| [04:41] | Organize the event, bring in corporate sponsorship… | 组织活动 带来大企业的赞助 |
| [04:44] | I say we’re doing fine without him. | 我觉得我们没他也做得挺好的 |
| [04:45] | If you call selling 40 tickets “Doing fine”. | 你觉得卖出40张票算得上挺好吗 |
| [04:50] | Brian’s put together a proposal | 布莱恩起草了一个方案 |
| [04:52] | to give the carnival a bit more edge. | 让嘉年华变得更前卫 |
| [04:54] | Edge? | 前卫 |
| [04:55] | He’s also contacted a few of his clients. | 他还联系了他的一些客户 |
| [04:58] | And they’ve agreed to sponsor the event, | 他们欣然同意赞助这次活动 |
| [04:59] | and match any funds we raise up to $100,000. | 无论我们筹到多少钱 他们都会增加到10万美金 |
| [05:07] | Please extend to Mr. Kinney the center’s gratitude | 请向肯尼先生转达中心对他 |
| [05:11] | for volunteering his time and effort. | 义务奉献时间和精力的感谢 |
| [05:14] | Well, he’s… | 不过 |
| [05:15] | not exactly volunteering. | 他不是义务的 |
| [05:18] | He wants 20% off the top. | 他希望获得总资金的20% |
| [05:20] | He expects us to pay him? For fundraising? | 他想让我们付他钱做募捐吗 |
| [05:23] | – Is he kidding? – Well, his feeling is, | -开什么玩笑 -总之他的意思是 |
| [05:26] | “Would you rather have 100% of nothing, | “你们是愿意一分钱都没有呢 |
| [05:28] | or 80% of more than you ever fucking dreamed of?” | 还是得到梦寐以求的资金总额80%呢” |
| [05:49] | So what do you think? | 你觉得怎样 |
| [05:51] | Can I buy it? | 要买下来吗 |
| [05:52] | $30,000? | 三万美金 |
| [05:53] | That’s a lot of money for an old car. | 买辆老款的车未免太贵了 |
| [05:55] | It’s not old, it’s a classic. | 不是老款 是经典款 |
| [05:56] | So how do you plan on paying for it? | 那你打算拿什么钱来支付 |
| [05:58] | A little extra cash just fell in my lap. | 我刚收到一笔外快 |
| [06:00] | Well, that’s a sizeable chunk of change | 被男朋友甩后 |
| [06:01] | for boyfriend replacement therapy. | 确实需要一大笔钱来疗伤啊 |
| [06:04] | I don’t have a boyfriend. | 我没有男朋友 |
| [06:06] | – I’ve never had a boyfriend. – Right. | -我从来没有过 -好吧 |
| [06:09] | Then it must be a mid-life crisis. | 那你就是遇到中年危机了 |
| [06:11] | – I’m only 30. … – 1. | -我才30岁 -31了 |
| [06:12] | And since I plan on being dead by the time I’m 39, | 鉴于我计划39岁时就死去 |
| [06:14] | it’s one annoyance I won’t have to deal with. | 所以这个烦恼我是不会遇到的 |
| [06:16] | Yeah. I’ll be sure to remind you of that on your 60th birthday. | 好啊 我会在你60岁生日的时候提醒你这事的 |
| [06:21] | Come on, Mikey. If we leave now, | 好了 小迈 我们现在出发的话 |
| [06:22] | we can be in New York by midnight. | 午夜就能到纽约了 |
| [06:24] | No fucking way. | 没门 |
| [06:26] | Ben nearly moved out because of you. | 本因为你差点搬出去 |
| [06:40] | Jean, your order’s up. | 简 你的餐好了 |
| [06:42] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [06:43] | Is that look of longing… | 你这是想要我 |
| [06:45] | for me or the coconut cream? | 还是要椰子奶油 |
| [06:48] | Now wouldn’t you like to know? | 你一定很想知道吧 |
| [06:50] | – Want the last bite? – Hell, no. | -最后一口你吃吧 -才不要 |
| [06:53] | I’m almost at the point where I actually have a waist. | 我的腰就快凸显出来了 |
| [06:56] | Or haven’t you noticed? | 还是说你没注意到 |
| [06:57] | Oh, I’ve noticed. | 我注意到了 |
| [07:00] | And? | 然后呢 |
| [07:01] | And it’s lookin’ good. | 看起来很漂亮 |
| [07:04] | Real good. | 相当漂亮 |
| [07:06] | Come on, Deb. | 快点 黛比 |
| [07:09] | Order’s up. | 餐好了 |
| [07:10] | – Uh, see you Friday? – Yeah. | -星期五见 -好 |
| [07:12] | – I’ll reserve a lane. – What do you say… | -我会预定一个球道 -不如… |
| [07:14] | we skip the bowling this week? | 这周不打保龄球怎么样 |
| [07:16] | Maybe have a little dinner? | 也许可以一起去吃个饭 |
| [07:18] | Friday is, uh, three grams of fish | 周五的减肥餐是三克鱼肉 |
| [07:20] | and four ounces of steamed kale. | 配四盎司蒸甘蓝 |
| [07:23] | My favourite. | 我的最爱 |
| [07:25] | Afterwards we can watch TV. | 然后我们可以看电视 |
| [07:28] | Yeah, well the… the, uh… | 可以 不过… |
| [07:29] | the set downstairs is still on the fritz. | 楼下的电视机还没修好 |
| [07:32] | The only one that’s working is the one in my bedroom. | 只能去我卧室里看 |
| [07:35] | I know. | 我知道 |
| [07:44] | – There you go. – Ooh, food. | -请慢用 -吃的来了 |
| [07:47] | So, Deb… | 黛比 |
| [07:49] | What’s it like, doing it with a cop? | 跟一个警察做 感觉怎样 |
| [07:52] | Does he… conduct a strip search? | 他会不会 对你进行裸体搜身 |
| [07:54] | Handcuff you to the bed? | 把你铐在床边 |
| [07:55] | Work you over till you sing? | 操到你爽得尖叫 |
| [07:56] | Do you know what M.Y.O.B. stands for? | 知道M.Y.O.B.是什么意思吗 |
| [08:00] | Mind your own fucking business. | 别他妈多管闲事 |
| [08:05] | Shouldn’t there be an “F” in there? | 那岂不应该还有个”F” |
| [08:19] | I have a proposition. | 我这边有个机会[卖身] |
| [08:22] | A business proposition. | 一个工作机会 |
| [08:24] | – What’d you have in mind? – A poster. | -你想要什么 -海报 |
| [08:27] | Something hot and brilliant, | 要火辣 要出彩 |
| [08:28] | and something by… tomorrow? | 而且得在明天做完 |
| [08:34] | I wouldn’t ask you if I didn’t think you could do it. | 我觉得你能做到才来找你的 |
| [08:36] | Or if you weren’t desperate. | 你是找不到别人了吧 |
| [08:38] | Yeah, that too. | 也可以这么说 |
| [08:42] | What’s it for? | 做什么用的 |
| [08:44] | It’s for the Center Carnival. | 同志中心的嘉年华 |
| [08:45] | You fucking hate the center. | 你不是恨死那个中心了吗 |
| [08:47] | Not when they’re paying me. | 只要他们给钱就无所谓 |
| [08:50] | So, how much do you want? | 你开个价吧 |
| [08:52] | It’s for a good cause, so it’s free. | 既然是公益事业 免费 |
| [08:54] | Christ, didn’t I teach you anything? | 老天 你从我身上什么都没学到吗 |
| [08:56] | 500. | 500块 |
| [08:57] | – 200. – 500. | -200块 -500块 |
| [09:00] | Take it or leave it. | 不干就拉倒 |
| [09:02] | I like the way you do business. | 我喜欢你做生意的风格 |
| [09:09] | You had the procedure? | 你做了手术 |
| [09:10] | Like you said, it was no big deal. | 就像你说的 没什么大不了的 |
| [09:13] | He did it in the office, | 在医生办公室做的 |
| [09:14] | zapped me with a laser, a couple of stitches… | 用激光开刀 再缝了几针 |
| [09:16] | But you should’ve told me, I would’ve come. | 你应该告诉我 我可以陪你去 |
| [09:18] | It was something I had to do on my own. Like… | 有些事必须自己去做 |
| [09:21] | bungee-jumping. | 就好像蹦极 |
| [09:22] | I hope that’s not next. | 希望你不是真的要去蹦极 |
| [09:24] | I mean, face my fears head-on, | 我的意思是 直面恐惧 |
| [09:26] | and hope I don’t land splat! | 希望不会摔得太惨 |
| [09:28] | And did you land… splat? | 那你摔着了吗 |
| [09:30] | Everything’s fine. | 一切都好 |
| [09:32] | He said I can get pregnant right away. | 他说我现在就可以怀孕 |
| [09:35] | Oh. Mel. | 茉儿 |
| [09:42] | I guess you’re right. I- I was… | 我想你说得对 我… |
| [09:44] | I was just using it as an excuse. | 我只是把它当做借口 |
| [09:45] | – It doesn’t matter. – It matters a lot. | -没关系 -有关系 |
| [09:48] | Because I want to be the one to carry our next child. | 因为我想由我来孕育我们的下一个孩子 |
| [09:53] | Are you sure? | 你确定吗 |
| [09:56] | So we could have a little Melanie? | 那样我们就能有一个小茉蕾妮了 |
| [09:58] | – Or Melvin. – By next Christmas? | -或者马尔文 -下个圣诞节前就生 |
| [10:00] | Hanukah. | 光明节 |
| [10:03] | Now all we have to do is pick a donor. | 现在我们只需挑一个捐精者 |
| [10:06] | I… thought we already had one. | 我们不是已经有一个了吗 |
| [10:10] | There’s no fucking way | 我才不要让 |
| [10:12] | Brian Kinney’s fucking sperm | 布莱恩·肯尼的破精子 |
| [10:13] | are doing the breaststroke up my fallopian tube. | 跑到我的输卵管里蛙泳 |
| [10:15] | They do the Australian Crawl. | 那是澳洲自由泳 |
| [10:17] | I speak from experience. | 这是经验之谈 |
| [10:20] | Not after all the grief he’s caused us. | 他给我们带来这么多麻烦 |
| [10:23] | Uh, we are not making the same mistake twice. | 同样的错误我们可不能犯两次 |
| [10:25] | I understand perfectly how you feel. | 我完全了解你的感受 |
| [10:27] | But what if something were to happen to us? | 可如果哪一天我们出事了怎么办 |
| [10:29] | – A fatal accident. – Bungee-jumping? | -比如致命的意外 -蹦极吗 |
| [10:31] | I’m serious. | 我说真的 |
| [10:32] | At least our kids would have the same father. | 至少我们的孩子有同一个父亲 |
| [10:33] | Oh, some father. | 他也配叫父亲 |
| [10:35] | Selfish, promiscuous. | 自私 淫乱 |
| [10:37] | And who knows if he’s even negative? | 谁知道他到底有没有染上艾滋病 |
| [10:38] | Well, whoever it is would have to be tested. | 不管是谁 都得让他先做测试 |
| [10:40] | But think how good he’s been to us, and to Gus. | 他对我们还是不错的 对盖斯也是 |
| [10:42] | Always there to write a cheque, | 总是愿意掏支票付钱 |
| [10:44] | put up a swing set, and save our wedding from disaster. | 帮我们装秋千 还拯救了我们的婚礼 |
| [10:47] | Honestly, Mel, he’s not the old Brian. | 老实说 茉儿 他不是从前那个布莱恩了 |
| [10:50] | He’s changed. | 他变了很多 |
| [10:51] | And bottom line… | 再说了 |
| [10:53] | Without him, our kids wouldn’t be related. | 如果不找他 我们的孩子就没血缘关系了 |
| [11:05] | Who’s the hottie? | 那帅哥是谁 |
| [11:06] | My boyfriend. | 我男朋友 |
| [11:08] | The other hottie. | 另外一个帅哥 |
| [11:10] | Ooh, looks like Tarzan. | 身材像泰山 |
| [11:13] | And he sounds like Jane. | 声音像珍妮[泰山的女朋友] |
| [11:15] | I’d warble like a coloratura if I had pecs like his. | 如果我的胸肌跟他一样 我也会叫出花腔女高音 |
| [11:17] | Well, shoot yourself up with jungle juice and you can. | 你也去注射点「丛林圣水」就行了 |
| [11:20] | What, steroids? | 你是说类固醇 |
| [11:22] | Yeah, I’m surprised his liver hasn’t fallen out of his asshole. | 是啊 我很惊讶他的肝还没从屁眼里掉出来 |
| [11:24] | Not to mention mood swings | 更别提情绪起伏不定 |
| [11:26] | and his balls shrinking up to the size of two M&M peanuts. | 蛋蛋还会缩水成巧克力花生大小 |
| [11:29] | Mom, what are you doing here? | 妈 你来这里干什么 |
| [11:31] | Same thing you are. | 跟你一样 |
| [11:32] | Cruising for a blow-job? | 找人帮你口交吗 |
| [11:34] | Jesus, ma, you already go to the same bars | 天呐 妈 你跟我去一家酒吧 |
| [11:36] | and the same clubs I do. | 一家夜店 |
| [11:37] | Now you gotta come to the same gym? | 现在还要来同一家健身房 |
| [11:39] | Can’t I have one place in the world that’s my own? | 我就不能有一点点私人空间吗 |
| [11:42] | So you wanna be workout buddies? | 想跟我成为健身搭档吗 |
| [11:53] | Looking good, girl! | 看着不错啊 美女 |
| [11:55] | Bet your private dick thinks so too. | 你那位私家鸡巴[私家侦探]肯定也这么想 |
| [11:58] | I told you, | 我跟你们说过了 |
| [11:59] | I have no intention of turning the most intimate details | 我并不打算将我私生活的隐秘细节 |
| [12:02] | of my personal life into gym gossip, | 变成健身房的八卦 |
| [12:03] | like you gay guys. | 你们基佬才这样 |
| [12:05] | In other words, you haven’t done it yet. | 换句话说 你还没跟他做过 |
| [12:08] | Well, it isn’t because he isn’t interested. | 不是因为他不感兴趣 |
| [12:11] | It’s just been a while since I… I “worked out”. | 只是我太久 没”运动”过了 |
| [12:15] | I wouldn’t want to disappoint him. | 我不想让他失望 |
| [12:20] | If anyone knows how to please his man, | 如果说有谁知道如何取悦自己的男人 |
| [12:22] | it’s Em. | 就是小艾 |
| [12:25] | Hush! | 别说了 |
| [12:27] | Honey, all you need is a little refresher course. | 亲爱的 你只需要稍微复习一下 |
| [12:30] | And who better to instruct you | 当然最佳指导老师 |
| [12:31] | than Professors Honeycutt and Schmidt? | 非哈尼卡特和施密特教授莫属 |
| [12:35] | Doctors of dickology. | 我们是「鸡巴学」博士 |
| [12:54] | She’s not in here, is she? | 她不在这吧 |
| [12:57] | – Who? – My mother. | -谁 -我妈 |
| [12:58] | It’s the men’s locker room. | 这可是男更衣室 |
| [13:00] | You think that’ll stop her? | 你觉得这能吓退她吗 |
| [13:02] | A full hour on the precor, | 在器材上锻炼了一个小时 |
| [13:04] | and all I dropped was a pound. | 我就减了一磅 |
| [13:05] | Gotta cut back on that pizza. | 你不能再吃披萨了 |
| [13:07] | Hey, Ben. | 你好啊 本 |
| [13:09] | – Hey, Jason. How’s it going? – Good. | -你好 杰森 最近怎么样啊 -很好 |
| [13:11] | Remember those 5 minutes in the ’90s | 记得90年代有一小段时间 |
| [13:12] | when everybody wanted to put on weight | 大家都想增肥 |
| [13:14] | because it meant you weren’t dying? | 因为那表示你没有患艾滋垂死 |
| [13:15] | Didn’t do Paul any good. | 可惜没帮上保罗 |
| [13:17] | At least we don’t have to go back to that goddamn hospice. | 至少我们不用再去那个临终关怀疗养院了 |
| [13:19] | Talk about depressing. | 那里的气氛太抑郁了 |
| [13:21] | Sorry, what was that about Paul? | 不好意思 保罗怎么了 |
| [13:24] | Oh, didn’t you hear? | 你没听说吗 |
| [13:27] | He died last night. | 他昨晚去世了 |
| [13:34] | All right, I’ll be there. | 行 我会去的 |
| [13:35] | Even if it means incurring Ishigura’s wrath | 就算石仓会因为我没练习 |
| [13:37] | for not practicing my Bartok. | 巴托克的曲子而发火 |
| [13:41] | I don’t know, I’ll ask him. | 不知道 我问问他 |
| [13:42] | Hey, Jus, my friend Collier wants to know | 贾斯汀 我朋友科利尔问 |
| [13:44] | if my imaginary lover will be accompanying me to his soiree. | 我的幻想爱人愿不愿意参加他的晚会 |
| [13:47] | Tell him I would sooner eat shit and die. | 告诉他我宁愿去吃屎撞墙也不去 |
| [13:50] | He says he can’t wait to meet you. | 他说很想见见你 |
| [13:52] | All right. I’ll talk to you later. | 好的 晚点再说 |
| [13:55] | Now, why do you have to be so anti-social? | 你为什么这么反社交啊 |
| [13:57] | I’m not anti-social. | 我不是反社交 |
| [14:00] | I just… can’t stand people. | 我只是不太能忍受别人 |
| [14:03] | Come on, you’ll have a great time. | 没事 你会玩得很高兴的 |
| [14:05] | Chatting inanely about independent film, | 面对一屋子陌生人 |
| [14:07] | with a roomful of strangers? | 对独立电影发表一些空洞的意见 |
| [14:09] | Oh my God, you’re a bigger fucking snob than I am. | 天呐 你简直比我还势利 |
| [14:12] | Must be why I love you. | 怪不得我这么爱你 |
| [14:15] | What’s this? | 这是什么 |
| [14:16] | It’s a poster I’m working on for a charity event. | 我为一个慈善活动画的海报 |
| [14:19] | I wish somebody would throw a benefit for us. | 我希望有人能为我们办个慈善活动 |
| [14:21] | Actually, I’m getting paid. | 事实上 我是收钱的 |
| [14:24] | Like… as in, dollars? | 收钱 美金吗 |
| [14:26] | As in, 500 of them. | 对啊 500美金 |
| [14:29] | No shit! How did you swing that? | 靠 你哪来的生意 |
| [14:31] | Someone I know. | 朋友介绍的 |
| [14:34] | Someone you know… someone we both know? | 朋友 我也认识的那个吗 |
| [14:36] | Uh, he needed an artist. | 他需要一个美术人员 |
| [14:38] | And even though he works with dozens of them | 尽管他每天在公司 |
| [14:40] | all day long in his office, | 和一堆美术人员打交道 |
| [14:41] | he miraculously thought of you. | 但他还是奇迹般地想到了你 |
| [14:44] | Maybe he thought I was… | 也许他认为我 |
| [14:46] | best qualified for the job. | 最适合这份工作 |
| [14:48] | Or maybe he’s just trying to win you back. | 也许他只是想再次赢回你的芳心 |
| [14:50] | He can try all he wants. | 他想怎么努力尝试随他的便 |
| [14:53] | What makes you think I would ever go? | 你凭什么觉得我会乖乖回去 |
| [14:55] | Oh, I don’t know. He’s rich, gorgeous, | 我不知道 他有钱 又帅气 |
| [14:57] | he can make cash magically appear… | 随时随地可以变出现金 |
| [15:00] | Fuck the money. | 叫他的钱去死 |
| [15:02] | Fuck him. | 叫他也去死吧 |
| [15:05] | I want to be with you. | 我想跟你在一起 |
| [15:08] | Prove it. | 证明给我看 |
| [15:12] | I’m not going to prove it. | 我才不要证明呢 |
| [15:14] | Come on. | 来吧 |
| [15:18] | “How do I love thee? Let me count the ways…” | “我是多么地爱你 让我逐一细数” |
| [15:19] | 出自伊丽莎白·勃朗宁的 经典爱情诗歌 | |
| [15:20] | Oh, you can do better than that. | 这太烂了 你可以做得更好 |
| [16:03] | No, this one’s on me. | 别 这杯我请 |
| [16:09] | So what do you want this time? | 你们这次又想要什么了 |
| [16:12] | We’ve decided to give Gus a sibling. | 我们打算给盖斯生个弟弟或妹妹 |
| [16:18] | And just when you started to get your shape back? | 你不是刚开始恢复身材吗 |
| [16:21] | Oh, fuck you. | 去你的 |
| [16:23] | Well, luckily I haven’t shot a load in two hours. | 幸亏我两小时没射过精了 |
| [16:29] | This will just take a second. | 一秒钟就好 |
| [16:31] | Oh, not now! | 不是现在 |
| [16:32] | Well, when do you want it? | 那你什么时候想要 |
| [16:36] | I don’t. | 不是我 |
| [16:37] | There’s been a slight change of plans. | 计划有一点小变动 |
| [16:40] | I’m going to be the one to carry our next child. | 下个孩子由我来生 |
| [16:47] | You? | 你 |
| [16:49] | I thought you were barren. | 你不是不孕吗 |
| [16:50] | I wasn’t barren. | 我并不是不孕 |
| [16:52] | I had endometriosis. | 我有子宫内膜异位症 |
| [16:54] | But she’s cured. | 但她现在痊愈了 |
| [16:55] | Praise the Lord. | 赞美主 |
| [16:57] | So, what do you say? | 你意下如何 |
| [16:59] | It’s impossible. | 不可能 |
| [17:00] | Huh, Melanie’s one of the leading causes of erectile dysfunction. | 茉蕾妮是导致勃起障碍的最重大原因之一 |
| [17:04] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [17:05] | Besides, I agreed to inseminate you, | 再说 我答应给你捐精 |
| [17:06] | not your husband. | 不是给你老公 |
| [17:07] | But if we get someone else, | 但是如果我们找别人 |
| [17:08] | our kids won’t be related. | 两个孩子就没有血缘关系了 |
| [17:09] | Have you ever met my sister? | 你难道没见过我姐姐吗 |
| [17:10] | That’s not much of an argument. | 这个论据不成立 |
| [17:12] | We had a deal. | 我们有过协议的 |
| [17:13] | You’re the ones that changed the terms. | 是你们改变了协议条款 |
| [17:17] | Me and Melanie, mom and pop… | 我和茉蕾妮 成为妈妈和爸爸… |
| [17:23] | I’d say that went well. | 我觉得进展不错 |
| [17:27] | Jesus Christ! | 老天呐 |
| [17:29] | Do you realize people eat here? | 你们知道这是饭桌吗 |
| [17:31] | They’re all fresh and new. | 这些都是崭新的 没用过 |
| [17:33] | Hand picked from the pleasure boutique. | 我们亲手在情趣店挑选出来的 |
| [17:36] | I just want to sleep with the guy, not… | 我只是想睡他 又不是… |
| [17:38] | drill for oil. | 要挖石油 |
| [17:39] | Well, that’s why we brought these, | 所以我们才带了这些来 |
| [17:40] | to help you achieve your goal. | 帮助你达成心愿 |
| [17:42] | Which would you say most resembles Detective Horvath? | 哪个最接近霍瓦特探长的尺寸呢 |
| [17:46] | How the hell would I know? | 我怎么会知道 |
| [17:48] | I’ve only kissed him. | 我们只接吻过 |
| [17:50] | Now put those things away. | 把这些玩意儿拿走 |
| [17:52] | Not so fast. | 别这么快下定论 |
| [17:54] | Now, you asked for our help, | 既然你有求 |
| [17:55] | and that’s why we’ve come: | 我们必应 |
| [17:56] | To teach you. | 来教教你 |
| [17:57] | The art… of oral sex. | 口交的艺术 |
| [18:00] | We’re going to share with you secrets known heretofore only to gay men. | 我们会传授你只有基佬才精通的房中秘术 |
| [18:04] | Techniques passed down from generation to generation | 这些技巧自太古时期起 |
| [18:07] | since time immemorial. | 就代代相传 |
| [18:08] | Once you’ve passed the course, | 你通过这门课程后 |
| [18:10] | we guarantee Horvath will forever regard you as his goddess, his queen. | 霍瓦特绝对会把你奉作他心目中的女神 |
| [18:14] | Cleopatra, | 克利奥帕特拉[埃及艳后] |
| [18:16] | Scheherazade… | 雪赫拉莎德[一千零一夜] |
| [18:17] | Reese Witherspoon. | 瑞茜·威瑟斯彭[律政俏佳人] |
| [18:20] | Now, shall we begin? | 开始吧 |
| [18:22] | All right. | 首先 |
| [18:24] | Let us relax the jaw. | 活动活动下颚 |
| [18:26] | Rotating it first clockwise… | 先按顺时针方向转 |
| [18:30] | Then counter-clockwise… | 再来逆时针方向 |
| [18:32] | Yeah. Good. | 对 很好 |
| [18:33] | Now wag the tongue. | 接着颤动舌头 |
| [18:36] | Yeah, that’s the way. | 没错 就这样 |
| [18:38] | Next, grasp the shaft firmly with our right hand, | 然后 用右手稳稳地握住它 |
| [18:41] | left if we’re a southpaw; creating a velvet vise. | 左撇子就换个手 握成柔软的阴道状 |
| [18:47] | Now open wide, | 接着张大嘴 |
| [18:48] | being sure to cover the teeth, | 注意盖住牙齿 |
| [18:50] | allowing for a smooth and unobstructed entry. | 这样才能使之顺利且无伤害地进入 |
| [18:54] | Comme Ca… | 像这样 |
| [18:59] | Boys, you know I love you. | 孩子们 你们知道我爱你们 |
| [19:02] | I just need to ask one question. | 但我有个问题 |
| [19:04] | If it’s about suppressing the gag reflex, | 如果是关于如何抑制干呕反应的问题 |
| [19:06] | w-we’re getting to that. | 我们等下就会说到 |
| [19:07] | Are you out of your fucking minds? | 你们是他妈疯了吗 |
| [19:11] | There’s no way I’m gonna… do this. | 我才不要干这些 |
| [19:13] | There are parties in Beverly Hills | 好多主妇到比弗利山庄 |
| [19:15] | where housewives pay 1,000 bucks a head… | 花上千块去学这些 |
| [19:17] | – So to speak. – To learn what we’re teaching you, for free. | -可以这么说吧 -而我们现在在免费教你 |
| [19:21] | Debbie, | 黛比 |
| [19:22] | you want to make Horvath happy, don’t you? | 你想让霍瓦特开心 对吧 |
| [19:25] | Sure I do. | 当然了 |
| [19:27] | And even have a good time yourself? | 同时也想让自己享受”快乐” |
| [19:30] | So what’s the harm in learning how to do it the right way? | 那么何乐而不为呢 |
| [19:53] | One, | 一 |
| [19:54] | two… | 二 |
| [20:24] | It’s chilly out here. I didn’t want you to get s… | 外面很冷 我不希望你… |
| [20:29] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [20:32] | I am all right. | 我没事 |
| [20:36] | I’m sorry. | 我很遗憾 |
| [20:39] | For what? | 为了什么 |
| [20:41] | For Paul. For you. | 为保罗 也为你 |
| [20:44] | I just didn’t expect it to be so soon. | 我只是没想到一切来得那么快 |
| [20:47] | If I’d known, I would’ve… | 要是我早点知道 我就会… |
| [20:49] | gone to see him more often. | 多去看看他了 |
| [20:51] | You were busy. | 你太忙了 |
| [20:53] | Yeah, right. | 是啊 |
| [20:57] | That’s always a good excuse, not to visit someone | 对于不去看望曾跟你分享人生的旧情人 |
| [20:58] | you once shared your life with, your bed… | 这还真是个好借口 |
| [21:01] | I’m sure he understood. | 我相信他一定也能理解 |
| [21:05] | And forgave you the same way you forgave him. | 就像你原谅他那样原谅你 |
| [21:07] | Then why am I so goddamn angry at him right now? | 那我现在为什么这么生他的气 |
| [21:12] | For getting it, for giving it to me… | 气他染上这病 气他传给我 |
| [21:15] | and then not even bothering to take care of himself, | 还不好好照顾自己 |
| [21:18] | or watch what he ate. | 乱吃东西 |
| [21:19] | I would tell him, “Nutrition is essential. And exercise. | 我会告诉他 “营养和运动都是必备的 |
| [21:22] | You’ve got to exercise, Paul, | 你得运动 保罗 |
| [21:23] | build up your muscle mass.” | 让自己强壮些” |
| [21:24] | But it was as if once he knew he had it… | 可自从他知道自己得了艾滋 |
| [21:30] | he figured, “I’m going to die anyway, | 他觉得 “反正我快死了 |
| [21:32] | so what the hell difference does it make?” | 做这些还有意义吗” |
| [21:38] | Luckily, you’re not like that. | 幸好你不是那样 |
| [21:41] | Right. | 是啊 |
| [21:43] | You do everything you’re supposed to do. | 你坚持做你应该做的每一件事 |
| [21:45] | Everything you can possibly do. | 一切你有能力去做的事 |
| [21:46] | And in spite of everything, I still ended up in the hospital. | 尽管如此 我还是住院了 |
| [21:48] | Maybe he’s right… | 也许他是对的 |
| [21:51] | Maybe it doesn’t matter. | 也许一切都是徒劳 |
| [21:52] | It does matter. | 不是徒劳 |
| [21:54] | And most important is you have to believe it does. | 最重要的是你得相信这有用 |
| [22:16] | More cod? | 再来点鳕鱼吗 |
| [22:17] | Three grams, I’m stuffed. | 已经吃了三克了 我饱了 |
| [22:22] | Well, there’s fruit for dessert. | 甜点是水果 |
| [22:24] | I know it’s not exactly exciting but… | 可能并不值得期待 但是… |
| [22:26] | With you in the room, what could be? | 有你在 夫复何求 |
| [22:31] | I’ll get the fruit. | 我去拿水果 |
| [22:35] | Forget the fruit. | 别拿水果了 |
| [22:38] | I’ve got a better idea. | 我有更好的主意 |
| [22:39] | I’m too heavy, you… | 我太沉了 你… |
| [22:40] | You’re beautiful. | 你真美 |
| [22:45] | Carl… | 卡尔 |
| [22:47] | I have a confession to make. | 有件事我得先说好 |
| [22:49] | I’m a little nervous. | 我有点紧张 |
| [22:50] | About what? | 紧张什么 |
| [22:52] | About this. | 就这个 |
| [22:56] | I want to be with you. | 我想和你在一起 |
| [23:01] | It’s just that it’s been a long time. | 只是我已经很久没做过了 |
| [23:03] | How long? | 有多久 |
| [23:06] | Last century. | 最后一次是上个世纪 |
| [23:10] | Well, don’t worry about it. | 没关系 不用担心 |
| [23:12] | I promise to be gentle, guide you through it… | 我会很温柔的 引导你一步一步… |
| [23:16] | Maybe even teach you a few things. | 也许还能教你点什么 |
| [23:25] | The expression on his face needs to be more… | 他的表情应该更加 |
| [23:28] | enticing. | 挑逗些 |
| [23:29] | But… more foreboding. | 但同时 也存在一种暗示 |
| [23:33] | “Enter at your own risk, prepare to be fucked”. | 「进来得自承风险 做好被操的准备」 |
| [23:38] | Think I can manage that. | 我应该办得到 |
| [23:40] | You could probably get a better view if you stood a little closer. | 如果你靠近些 应该可以看得更清楚些 |
| [23:48] | And his hips need to be more in profile | 他的臀部应该多侧过去一些 |
| [23:50] | to accentuate his cock. | 以突显他的鸡巴 |
| [23:53] | It’s always about sex. | 一切都是关于性 |
| [23:55] | Unless it’s about death. | 除非事关生死 |
| [23:56] | But… death doesn’t sell tickets. | 但是 死亡可没有促销效果 |
| [24:01] | I picked up Chinese food. | 我带了点中国菜 |
| [24:06] | I didn’t know it was for three. | 我不知道要买三人份的 |
| [24:08] | I was just going. | 我正打算走 |
| [24:11] | We’re done, right? | 我们谈完了吧 |
| [24:19] | So glad you boys kissed and made up. | 你们能和好真是太好了 |
| [24:24] | How much do I owe you? | 我该给你多少钱 |
| [24:25] | It’s on me. | 算我请客 |
| [24:28] | Well, in that case… | 既然这样 |
| [24:31] | allow me to… | 那就由我 |
| [24:33] | supply… | 来提供 |
| [24:36] | the hors d’oeuvres. | 开胃小菜吧 |
| [25:11] | Do you see one dropping? | 你看到有一滴落下来了吗 |
| [25:16] | Tony Facelli. Remember… | 托尼·费彻利 还记得… |
| [25:18] | He was the one who taught us how to light our farts? | 就是他教我们怎么把屁点着的 |
| [25:21] | And his pants caught on fire. | 结果却把他的裤子点着了 |
| [25:24] | He… he, uh… he… | 他 他… |
| [25:26] | He died in that car wreck. | 他后来死于车祸了 |
| [25:33] | Uh, Linda Slutsky. | 琳达·斯拉茨基 |
| [25:35] | Slutsky the Slutsky? | 那个荡妇斯拉茨基吗 |
| [25:38] | She got expelled for giving Mr. Dorf, | 她被开除了 因为给多夫先生 |
| [25:40] | the… the math teacher, head. | 那个数学老师口交 |
| [25:41] | She became a lap dancer in Scranton. | 她后来在斯克兰顿市跳脱衣舞 |
| [25:47] | Which just goes to show, | 这些都证明了 |
| [25:48] | “All life is a lesson.” | “人生处处是学问” |
| [25:50] | That’s what Ben always says. | 这是本的口头禅 |
| [25:53] | His, uh… | 他的… |
| [25:54] | His ex, Paul, the one who infected him… | 前男友保罗 害他染上艾滋病的那个 |
| [26:00] | died. | 死了 |
| [26:04] | What a wonderful world. | 真是个美妙的世界 |
| [26:07] | You have to be nuts, | 除非你是个疯子 |
| [26:08] | or a selfish piece of shit, | 或者自私自利的混蛋 |
| [26:11] | to want to bring a… a child into it. | 才会让一个孩子降生到这世上 |
| [26:15] | You did. | 你就这么做了啊 |
| [26:16] | Yeah, Lindsay convinced me one night when I was tripping. | 是啊 某晚琳赛在我嗑了药后说服我的 |
| [26:22] | But I’m sure as hell not doing it for smelly melly. | 但我发誓再也不会为她女朋友这么做了 |
| [26:26] | They can go to a sperm bank. | 她们可以去精子库 |
| [26:27] | Or scrape it off the floor in the backroom at Babylon. | 或者直接在巴比伦暗室的地板上刮一点 |
| [26:33] | J… just give me one valid reason | 给我一个合理的理由 |
| [26:35] | why any queer in his right mind | 怎么会有脑袋清醒的基佬 |
| [26:37] | would want to bring a kid into this world. | 想要将孩子带到这世上来呢 |
| [26:42] | Can’t think of one, can you? | 你也想不出一个吧 |
| [26:44] | Wait a minute. Wait, hold on. | 慢着 我想想 |
| [26:54] | To piss off straight people! | 为了惹怒异性恋 |
| [27:04] | You’re not disappointed, are you? | 你没有很失望吧 |
| [27:07] | Disappointed? | 失望 |
| [27:11] | More like amazed. | 简直太惊艳了 |
| [27:14] | Really? | 真的吗 |
| [27:15] | Especially after, uh… | 尤其是… |
| [27:17] | all that lip service about how nervous you were. | 你一直念叨你很紧张 |
| [27:22] | What’s that mean? | 什么意思 |
| [27:27] | Nothing. | 没什么 |
| [27:28] | Don’t give me “Nothing” after a remark like that. | 别给我扯淡了 你都说成那样了 |
| [27:32] | Let’s just say that… | 这么说吧 |
| [27:34] | no one could do what you just did without a little practice. | 如果没有练习的话 没人能做到你那样 |
| [27:37] | And from the way that you, uh… | 而且从你做的方式 |
| [27:40] | you know… | 你懂的… |
| [27:41] | lady… | 姑娘 |
| [27:43] | you could teach a class. | 你都可以开班授课了 |
| [27:45] | Is that so? | 是吗 |
| [27:46] | In fact, I heard in Beverly Hills | 实际上 我听说在比弗利山庄 |
| [27:49] | they charge $1,000 for it. | 有人收费1000块专门教这个 |
| [27:51] | Horvath, I was telling you the truth. | 霍瓦特 我说的都是实话 |
| [27:53] | This is the first time in years that I… | 这是我多年来第一次… |
| [27:55] | Yeah, sure. Whatever. | 好啦 随便啦 |
| [27:59] | You don’t believe me? | 你不相信我 |
| [28:05] | Well, that’s just too fucking bad. | 那他妈真是太遗憾了 |
| [28:07] | Now you better take your suspicions | 现在你最好带着你的怀疑 |
| [28:09] | and your suspenders, and, and…. | 和你的吊带裤 |
| [28:11] | and remove your butt from my bed! | 还有你的大屁股从我的床上滚下去 |
| [28:13] | Debbie… | 黛比 |
| [28:13] | Now, out! | 马上 滚 |
| [28:17] | Get out! | 滚出去 |
| [28:28] | Here’s your fee. | 这是你的酬劳 |
| [28:30] | – Plus $100 bonus for finishing on time. – Thanks. | -那100块是按时完成奖励 -谢了 |
| [28:35] | And here’s two tickets for tonight. | 这里有两张今晚的票 |
| [28:36] | One for you, and one for Ian. | 一张给你 一张给伊恩 |
| [28:44] | I was just admiring your boyfriend’s latest creation. | 我刚刚正在夸赞你男朋友的最新创作 |
| [28:47] | An artist always does his best work | 艺术家如果有爱人在身边 |
| [28:48] | when he has somebody he loves to inspire him. | 给他灵感 才能创作出最佳作品 |
| [28:51] | Huh. Yeah. So I’ve been told. | 也对 我听说也是这样 |
| [28:53] | We should go. | 我们该走了 |
| [28:54] | See you tonight. | 晚上见 |
| [28:56] | Oh, Brian gave us tickets to the Center Carnival. | 对了 布莱恩给我两张中心嘉年华的票 |
| [28:58] | Oh, I’m sure it’ll be a blast, but… | 我相信一定会很精彩 但是… |
| [29:00] | we’ve already got plans. | 我们已经有安排了 |
| [29:02] | Oh. Well, if you change your minds, | 好吧 如果你们改变主意的话 |
| [29:04] | your names’ll be on the list. | 你们还是可以去的 |
| [29:07] | So, how you doing? | 今天还好吗 |
| [29:10] | Why aren’t you in class? | 你怎么没去上课 |
| [29:11] | I thought you had a class… | 我以为你有课 |
| [29:18] | Order’s up on table four. | 4号台的餐好了 |
| [29:23] | Special today is the dick of death. | 今天的特色菜叫「死神鸡巴」 |
| [29:25] | Foot-long hot dog, creamy cole slaw on the side. | 一英尺长的热狗 两边配奶油沙拉卷心菜 |
| [29:27] | Don’t make me repeat it. | 别让我重复了 |
| [29:29] | Two specials. | 两份特色菜 |
| [29:32] | Wait, wait, wait! | 等等 等等 |
| [29:33] | So, how was it? | 昨晚怎么样啊 |
| [29:35] | Yeah, should your professors give you an “A”? | 是呀 你的考官给你的评分是A吗 |
| [29:36] | Yeah. For “Asshole”, | 是啊 A代表”蠢蛋” |
| [29:39] | ’cause that’s what I am for listening to you. | 我跟个蠢蛋一样听信了你们的话 |
| [29:41] | What, he wasn’t pleased? | 怎么 他不爽吗 |
| [29:43] | Impossible! | 不可能 |
| [29:44] | I defy any male, living or dead, | 我敢说任何男人 不管是死是活 |
| [29:46] | not to respond to our time-tested technique. | 都不可能对我们久经考验的技术没反应 |
| [29:47] | Provided you followed our instructions. | 除非你没按我们的指导去做 |
| [29:50] | Oh, I followed ’em. | 我按你们的指导做了 |
| [29:51] | He responded to every flick and lick. | 他对每一个动作都有反应 |
| [29:54] | And so, what’s the problem? | 那问题到底出在哪儿 |
| [29:55] | The problem is he thinks I’m a whore. | 问题在于他觉得我是个妓女 |
| [29:58] | I’m so proud! | 我太骄傲了 |
| [30:01] | Well, I never want to see him again. | 我再也不想见到他了 |
| [30:12] | Ooh, what about 873? | 873号怎么样 |
| [30:14] | 6’2, blue eyes, | 1.88米 蓝眼睛 |
| [30:16] | and a Mensa! | 门萨国际成员 |
| [30:19] | Is that what you really want? | 那是你真正想要的吗 |
| [30:20] | To give birth to a little 873 and 1/2? | 生个小873号 |
| [30:23] | Got cream. | 奶油来啦 |
| [30:27] | It was milked fresh this morning. | 今早刚挤的 |
| [30:29] | I should know. I milked it myself. | 我知道 是我亲手挤的 |
| [30:34] | That’s disgusting. | 好恶心 |
| [30:35] | That’s really disgusting. | 真的好恶心 |
| [30:36] | Yo, bitches, I’m offering to lend a hand. | 哟 贱人们 我可以帮你们一把 |
| [30:40] | Would you beat it? | 你能滚蛋吗[手淫] |
| [30:41] | That’s what I’ve been offering to do. | 我就是想玩玩蛋 射给你们啊 |
| [30:43] | Wait. Do you really mean it? | 等等 你是认真的吗 |
| [30:44] | Yeah. If it’s a boy, you can name him Brian Junior. | 是啊 如果是个男孩 就叫他小布莱恩 |
| [30:47] | And if it’s a girl? | 那要是个女孩呢 |
| [30:50] | Charity. In honour of my donation. | 就叫慈善 纪念我做的”捐”赠 |
| [30:53] | Now let’s go piss off some heterosexuals. | 现在我们去惹怒那些异性恋吧 |
| [31:53] | Hey, Roy. | 嘿 罗伊 |
| [31:54] | – How you doing? – Listen, I was, uh… | -你还好吗 -我在想 |
| [31:57] | I was wondering, could you, uh, | 我在想 你能不能 |
| [31:58] | give me some help, man? | 帮我个忙 |
| [32:00] | You want me to spot you? | 要我辅助你练吗 |
| [32:03] | Actually, it’s got more to do with, uh, nutrition. | 实际上 我想要来点有营养的东西 |
| [32:06] | Uh, supplements… | 一些补充剂 |
| [32:08] | If you know what I mean. | 明白我的意思吗 |
| [32:10] | Yeah. Come on. | 好的 来吧 |
| [32:38] | He arrested me, that’s why. | 他逮捕过我 这就是原因 |
| [32:39] | He likes you though. He thinks you’re funny. | 但是他喜欢你 他觉得你很有趣 |
| [32:44] | E-excuse us, Detective Horvath? | 打扰一下 霍瓦特探长 |
| [32:47] | What, uh, can I do for you boys? | 有什么可以效劳吗 |
| [32:51] | A dear friend of ours is in a little bit of… of trouble. | 我们的一个好朋友有点小麻烦 |
| [32:55] | Uh, seems last night, | 似乎是昨天晚上 |
| [32:57] | an, uh… oral… | 口头的… |
| [32:59] | misdemeanour… occurred. | 行为不当 |
| [33:04] | Don’t you have some work to do? | 你们没事做吗 |
| [33:09] | What the hell’s all this about? | 到底怎么回事 |
| [33:10] | Look, Debbie told us that you had sex. | 听着 黛比跟我们说你们做爱了 |
| [33:13] | Or… some heterosexual permutation thereof. | 或者是 某种异性交流方式 |
| [33:16] | Jesus H. Christ. | 天呐 |
| [33:18] | Why doesn’t she rent a billboard? | 她怎么不租个广告位大肆宣扬一番啊 |
| [33:19] | What we do in bed is none of your business. | 我们的床事不关你们的事 |
| [33:21] | Actually, it is. | 实际上 关我们的事 |
| [33:22] | See, uh, Debbie was worried that she wouldn’t live up to your expectations. | 黛比原本担心她达不到你的期望 |
| [33:27] | That she’d let you down. | 怕让你失望 |
| [33:28] | So, we gave her a crash course. | 所以我们给她上了一堂速成课 |
| [33:31] | “Introduction to fellatio 101.” | 《口交入门》 |
| [33:34] | Emmett’s one of the world’s foremost authorities. | 艾美特是全世界这方面最权威的人之一 |
| [33:36] | Aw, thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [33:37] | Ah, anyway, um, young Deborah passed with honours. | 总之 黛比通过了这门课 |
| [33:41] | Magna cum loudly. | 以最高分通过 |
| [33:42] | In fact, she did so well, you, uh… | 事实上 她表现得太好了 |
| [33:44] | – uh, apparently… – And misguidedly… | -显然让你… -错误地认为 |
| [33:46] | Think she’s a slut. | 她是一个荡妇 |
| [33:47] | The… the truth is, Detective, | 其实 探长 |
| [33:50] | we’re the sluts. | 我们才是荡妇 |
| [33:52] | Speak for yourself. | 仅代表你自己 |
| [33:55] | Look. | 听着 |
| [33:56] | Underneath all that dirty talk and bravado, | 在那些淫言秽语和虚张声势的表象下 |
| [33:59] | you know, Debbie is just an old-fashioned girl | 黛比其实是个传统的女孩 |
| [34:02] | whose only crime was… | 她错就错在 |
| [34:04] | wanting to please her man. | 想要取悦她的男人 |
| [34:19] | Oh, honey. | 亲爱的 |
| [34:20] | Rumour has it a certain finalist is out of the competition. | 传闻说一个进入决赛的选手退出比赛了 |
| [34:24] | Oh, poor Marta. | 可怜的玛塔 |
| [34:25] | She’s an astonishing talent, but terrified to perform. | 她是一个奇才 却害怕表演 |
| [34:28] | And this will be the tree in the forest that nobody hears. | 这就成了丛林中一棵无人听见的小树 |
| [34:31] | And then there’s Giorgio. | 然后还有乔治奥 |
| [34:32] | Mediocre musician at best. | 最多算个平庸的音乐人 |
| [34:34] | Yeah, but you put him in front of an audience, | 是的 但是你让他在观众面前表演的话 |
| [34:35] | he knocks ’em dead. | 他会把他们震撼得无以复加 |
| [34:36] | New York isn’t Pttsburgh. | 纽约不是匹兹堡 |
| [34:37] | They won’t be so easily fooled. | 他们不会那么容易被糊弄 |
| [34:39] | You, my dear, have nothing to worry about. | 至于你 亲爱的 你完全不必担心 |
| [35:00] | Having fun? | 玩得开心吗 |
| [35:01] | Yeah, it’s great. | 是啊 很棒 |
| [35:04] | Liar. | 小骗子 |
| [35:05] | No, your friends are really smart and funny. | 没有 你的朋友都很聪明有趣 |
| [35:09] | I guess I’m just nervous, that’s all. | 我想我可能有点紧张 仅此而已 |
| [35:12] | Ah, don’t be. | 别紧张 |
| [35:13] | You’re with me. | 你有我呢 |
| [35:19] | So this is the imaginary boyfriend. | 这就是你的幻想男友吗 |
| [35:22] | Ethan tells me you’re an artist. | 伊森跟我说你是个艺术家 |
| [35:24] | Yep. That’s right. | 是的 没错 |
| [35:25] | What kind of stuff do you do? | 你做什么的 |
| [35:27] | Lately, I’ve been manipulating classical form with digital imagery. | 最近 我都在用数字图像处理古典画法 |
| [35:33] | Then you’re not just a pretty face. | 看来你不只是长得帅而已 |
| [35:35] | No. | 的确 |
| [35:37] | I got a pretty big cock as well. | 我还有一根漂亮的大鸡巴 |
| [35:38] | And I give one hell of a blow-job. | 口交技术也很棒 |
| [35:40] | Right, Ethan? | 是吧 伊森 |
| [35:44] | Time to ring around the dildo! | 「假屌套环」时间到 |
| [35:47] | Oh my God! | 天呐 |
| [35:48] | Welcome to Carnival! | 欢迎来到嘉年华 |
| [35:58] | It’s time for “Butthole Bingo”. | 「屁眼宾果」时间到 |
| [35:59] | Whip-o-rama | 鞭打游戏 |
| [36:06] | G-51. | G51号 |
| [36:10] | Any colour, any size. | 颜色任选 大小任选 |
| [36:14] | A-34. | A34号 |
| [36:19] | And at the center stage, | 站在中心舞台上的是 |
| [36:20] | the grinder! | 磨刀女郎 |
| [36:26] | O-75. | O75号 |
| [36:33] | Oh my God. | 天呐 |
| [36:35] | Come on, every one, step up. | 来啊 大家都上前来 |
| [36:38] | Come on. It’s “Butthole Bingo”. | 来啊 现在是「屁眼宾果」时间 |
| [36:47] | B-13. | B13号 |
| [36:51] | Over 800 happy, satisfied customers, | 里面有超过八百个心满意足的顾客 |
| [36:53] | and a line around the block waiting to get in. | 外面还有人排队等着进来 |
| [36:56] | Jesus, Brian… | 天呐 布莱恩 |
| [36:57] | What is all this? | 这都是什么鬼 |
| [37:01] | I-19. | I19号 |
| [37:02] | This is “Butthole Bingo”. | 这是「屁眼宾果」 |
| [37:03] | And that is one remarkably gifted young man. | 那是个很有天赋的小伙子 |
| [37:06] | This wasn’t in the proposal you submitted. | 你提交的计划书里可没有这项 |
| [37:10] | Yeah, I took a few liberties. | 没错 我擅自做了点改动 |
| [37:11] | We’re supposed to represent a positive gay image. | 我们本该表现同性恋积极向上的一面 |
| [37:14] | What kind of message do you think we’re sending here? | 你觉得这是在传达什么样的信息 |
| [37:17] | That all men are created horny, and it’s… | 人类天生淫乱 |
| [37:19] | it’s okay to have a little down-and-dirty fun. | 而且一点低级娱乐无伤大雅 |
| [37:21] | You’ve really gone too far. | 你真的做得过火了 |
| [37:24] | Yeah, well if it’s any consolation to you, | 好吧 如果这能让你感到些许安慰的话 |
| [37:26] | you’ll be making 10,000 out of his ass alone. | 单是他的屁股就能给你赚来一万块 |
| [37:31] | O-69. | O69号 |
| [37:34] | “Vants me to make ze subsidiary subject zing, Ethan, zing!” | “想让我高分通过副科考试 伊森 冲吧” |
| [37:42] | I’m going to take off. | 我要走了 |
| [37:43] | What, already? | 这就要走了吗 |
| [37:44] | Yeah, I’m beat. | 是的 我累了 |
| [37:45] | All right, I’ll go with you. Um… | 好 我们一起走 |
| [37:47] | No, you… you can stay here. | 不必了 你留在这儿吧 |
| [37:49] | I’ll see you at home. | 我在家等你 |
| [37:50] | You sure? | 你确定吗 |
| [37:53] | Okay. Love you. | 好的 我爱你 |
| [37:56] | You too. | 我也是 |
| [38:28] | Can I come in? | 我能进来吗 |
| [38:48] | You just, uh… finishing dinner? | 你刚吃完晚饭吗 |
| [38:51] | Just starting. | 刚开始 |
| [38:52] | Three ounces of chicken, four ounces of lima beans. | 三盎司鸡肉 四盎司利马豆 |
| [38:56] | Is that enough? | 够吃吗 |
| [38:57] | You have to keep up your strength. | 你得保持体力 |
| [38:59] | Right. I have 10 blow-jobs to give before I hit the hay. | 没错 我睡觉前还得给10个人口交才行 |
| [39:04] | I wish you wouldn’t talk like that. | 你可以不那么说话吗 |
| [39:06] | It’s how experts talk. | 专家就是这么说话 |
| [39:07] | Yeah, I know. | 是啊 我知道 |
| [39:11] | Two of them came to the precinct today. | 今天有两个”专家”去分局找我了 |
| [39:15] | That tall swish-stick? | 那个高个儿娘娘腔 |
| [39:17] | Emmett? | 艾美特 |
| [39:19] | And the one who looks like an accountant. | 另一个像是会计 |
| [39:22] | Ted. | 泰德 |
| [39:24] | They explained all about your… education. | 他们说你接受了 「睡前教育」 |
| [39:27] | How you went to the head of the class. | 以及你是班里的”优等生” |
| [39:29] | Well, Emmett’s got a big mouth. | 艾美特是个大嘴巴 |
| [39:31] | In more ways than one. | 在很多方面都是 |
| [39:35] | What else did they tell you? | 他们还告诉你什么了 |
| [39:37] | That you did it for me. | 你那么做是为了我 |
| [39:41] | To please me. | 为了取悦我 |
| [39:44] | I wouldn’t do that for just anyone, you know. | 我不会为随便什么男人都做这种事的 |
| [39:48] | I know. | 我明白 |
| [39:50] | Do you have any idea what it means to me | 你那么努力地想取悦我 |
| [39:52] | that you wanted to give me pleasure that much? | 你知道这对我意味着什么吗 |
| [39:55] | I thought that’s what people do when they care about each other. | 我以为人们在乎彼此 就会那么做 |
| [39:59] | Which is why I enlisted Detectives Caffney and Leuellyn. | 于是我也去向卡芙妮和罗艾伦警官求教了 |
| [40:02] | They’re the two lesbians on the force. | 她们是警队里的拉拉 |
| [40:06] | I told… them | 我告诉她们 |
| [40:07] | I wanted a little crash course of my own. | 我想接受一些性爱速成课 |
| [40:13] | No. | 不会吧 |
| [40:14] | Oh, yeah. | 是真的 |
| [40:16] | And… how’d it go? | 怎么样 |
| [40:19] | It was very informative. | 让我学到了很多东西 |
| [40:23] | In fact, if you’d care to retire to the boudoir, | 事实上 如果你想去闺房休息 |
| [40:27] | I have a homework assignment to do. | 我还有家庭作业要做 |
| [40:34] | O-79. | O79号 |
| [40:40] | Time to ring around the dildo! | 「假屌套环」时间到 |
| [40:44] | G-51. | G51号 |
| [40:46] | Toss your rings, honey! | 快来套环吧 亲爱的 |
| [40:48] | One more. One more. | 再来一次 再来一次 |
| [40:52] | You have perfect aim. | 你瞄得真准 |
| [40:53] | Yeah, except at 2:00 in the morning when I have to pee. | 是啊 除了凌晨两点起床尿尿的时候 |
| [40:59] | For you. | 送给你 |
| [41:00] | My hero! | 我的英雄 |
| [41:03] | That reminds me of Ben. | 我想本了 |
| [41:04] | Yeah, it’s too bad he couldn’t come to Brian’s filthy carnival. | 是啊 他不能来布莱恩的下流嘉年华 太可惜了 |
| [41:07] | Well, he’s still bummed out about Paul. | 他还在为保罗的事难过 |
| [41:10] | Hey, you guys! | 嘿 你们好啊 |
| [41:13] | What are you doing here? | 你怎么来了 |
| [41:14] | It’s a night of fun and surprises! | 这是充满快乐和惊喜的一夜 |
| [41:16] | I’ll say! | 我同意 |
| [41:17] | Come on, you! | 来吧 |
| [41:22] | Where are they heading off to? | 他们要去哪儿 |
| [41:23] | – Who knows? – Bathtub races? | -谁知道 -浴缸竞赛 |
| [41:25] | What should we do next? What should we do next? | 我们接下来玩什么好呢 玩什么呢 |
| [41:27] | Dildo swallower! Dildo swallower! | 吞假屌 吞假屌 |
| [41:29] | Changed my ass. | 改变个屁 |
| [41:31] | Brian’s still the same irresponsible fucker he always was. | 布莱恩还是那个不负责任的混蛋 |
| [41:35] | On the other hand, | 不过从另一方面看 |
| [41:36] | he did make the center almost 100,000, minus his percentage. | 扣除他的抽成 他还为中心筹到了近十万块 |
| [41:39] | Yeah, and humiliate them in the process. | 是啊 还在过程中羞辱了他们 |
| [41:41] | That didn’t stop them from accepting the money. | 他们可不会因此就拒收那笔钱 |
| [41:44] | It served as a good reminder. | 这倒提醒了我 |
| [41:45] | Of what? | 什么 |
| [41:47] | That he’s a loose cannon. | 他是个不受控制的家伙 |
| [41:49] | Not to be trusted. | 根本不足以信任 |
| [41:51] | And definitely not the kind of person I want as the father of my child. | 我反正不会希望由这种人来当我孩子的父亲 |
| [41:55] | Oh, come on. | 拜托 |
| [41:56] | I’m serious. | 我是认真的 |
| [41:57] | No, you’re being ridiculous. | 不 你太荒唐了 |
| [41:59] | You actually expect me to have a baby with someone like that? | 你指望我和那样的人生孩子吗 |
| [42:02] | I did. | 是啊 |
| [42:04] | Well, that was your decision. | 当年是你的决定 |
| [42:06] | This one’s mine. | 这次由我来决定 |
| [42:07] | And I say I want someone else. | 我想跟其他人生 |
| [42:18] | Come on, everybody. It’s B-5. | 大家继续 这次是B5号 |
| [42:34] | Come on. Step up. | 快点 上台来 |
| [42:36] | Time to ring around the dildo! | 「假屌套环」时间到 |
| [42:48] | B-69. Butthole 69. | B69号 屁眼69号 |
| [42:52] | Oh, my God! | 天呐 |
| [42:55] | We have a bingo! | 有人完成了 |
| [42:57] | Step right up for whip-o-rama! | 快来参加鞭打游戏吧 |
| [43:01] | You made it. | 你来了 |
| [43:02] | Thought I’d see how it was going. | 我来看看活动搞得怎么样 |
| [43:04] | Where’s Ian? | 伊恩呢 |
| [43:06] | Ethan… is with his friends. | 是伊森 他和朋友在一起 |
| [43:08] | You should’ve brought him. | 你该带他一起来 |
| [43:10] | No, I don’t think so. | 不 不必了 |
| [43:11] | Maybe he could’ve learned a few things they don’t teach in college. | 也许他能学到大学里学不到的东西 |
| [43:18] | I guess I better go. | 我该走了 |
| [43:21] | Tell Ian we missed him. | 告诉伊恩我们想他了 |
| [43:22] | Once in a lifetime, it’s the grande. | 一辈子才有一次的 最精彩的节目 |
| [43:26] | N-34. | N34号 |
| [43:45] | You want to remove your ass? | 能把屁股挪开吗 |
| [43:49] | Groovy car. | 真是辆好车 |
| [43:50] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [43:52] | I always wanted one. | 我一直想要一辆 |
| [43:55] | No shit. | 开玩笑吧 |
| [43:56] | Must’ve cost a lot. | 肯定很贵吧 |
| [44:00] | Well, actually, it was a… charitable contribution. | 实际上 是慈善捐赠物 |
| [44:06] | So you want me to take you for a ride? | 要带你兜兜风吗 |
| [44:08] | I’d like that. | 非常乐意 |