| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:06] | Stop it! | 别动 |
| [00:07] | Hope made this for me at day care. | 这可是喜旺在日托所给我做的 |
| [00:09] | It’s not for eating. | 不是给你吃的 |
| [00:10] | If I was wearing food, I’d share it with you. | 我要是身上挂串吃的 肯定会和你分享的 |
| [00:12] | Come on. Just a… | 来嘛 就吃一口 |
| [00:14] | Shh! Trailers are the best part. | 轻点 我最爱看预告片了 |
| [00:16] | I enjoy Jack Black for 30 seconds at a time. | 我对杰克·布莱克每次只能喜爱30秒 |
| [00:18] | Shh! | 小点声 |
| [00:20] | I’ll be quiet when the cartoon popcorn | 等卡通爆米花出场 |
| [00:21] | tells me to be quiet. | 它说安静我就安静 |
| [00:25] | In every neighborhood , there’s a house like this. | 在每个社区都有这样一栋房子 |
| [00:28] | And in every house like that, | 而每栋这样的房子里 |
| [00:31] | there’s a family like this. | 都住着这样一户家庭 |
| [00:33] | Pull my finger, Grandma. | 拔一下我的手指 奶奶 |
| [00:40] | But this Christmas, this family is getting a gift | 可这个圣诞非同寻常 这家人收到了一份 |
| [00:42] | they didn’t expect. | 意想不到的厚礼 |
| [00:43] | I got a serial killer pregnant, and now she’s dead | 我把一个连环杀手的肚子搞大了 可现在她死了 |
| [00:46] | and I have to raise the baby…! | 留下了个孩子 |
| [01:01] | We ain’t raising no baby! I clean toilets all day. | 咱家没法养孩子 我白天已经忙着扫厕所了 |
| [01:04] | I ain’t cleaning no baby diapers all night long! | 可不想晚上还要收拾尿布 |
| [01:07] | I already cleaned Grand Ma Ma’s. | 奶奶的尿布已经够我受的了 |
| [01:11] | I like her. | 我喜欢 |
| [01:14] | How will this family of idiots raise a baby | 这群连自己都照顾不好的傻瓜 |
| [01:17] | when they can barely keep themselves alive? | 要怎么带大一个小宝宝 |
| [01:20] | I don’t know why people wait for their toast | 真搞不懂别人为什么要等面包弹出来 |
| [01:22] | to come out to butter it. | 再抹黄油 |
| [01:26] | Me… even stupider now! | 惨了 现在更蠢了 |
| [01:28] | Me electrocute brain! | 快被电酥了 |
| [01:31] | This Christmas, dumb gets a new name: | 这个圣诞 傻子们有了新名字 |
| [01:34] | It can’t be us. It can’t be us. It can’t be us. | 不会是我们 不会是我们 不会是我们 |
| [01:36] | The Chances of Natesville | 那什维尔镇上的吉斯家 |
| [01:39] | You’ll be glad you’re not them. | 你会为自己不是他们而高兴万分的 |
| [01:42] | Whackadoo! | 哇咔咔 |
| [01:53] | I got a little crazy last night | 我昨晚在律师协会办的 |
| [01:56] | at the Bar Association Christmas party. | 派对上玩得有点疯 |
| [01:59] | You gotta stop these people from putting this movie out! | 你必须阻止那些人公开上映这部电影 |
| [02:02] | According to my research, Lucy’s family sold the rights | 据我所知 露西家人把他们女儿的 |
| [02:05] | to their daughter’s story, | 故事版权卖了个好价钱 |
| [02:07] | which they weren’t that interested in | 没想到对方看过后 |
| [02:09] | except for the parts that involved your family. | 只对你们一家的故事饶有兴致 |
| [02:12] | Well, we didn’t sell our story! | 我们可没卖掉我们的故事 |
| [02:14] | Well, apparently, Jimmy did. | 貌似吉米卖了 |
| [02:17] | – What? Jimmy! – What in the hell? | -什么 吉米 -什么乱七八糟的 |
| [02:18] | I don’t remember signing any… | 我不记得有签过什么 |
| [02:22] | Oh, wait. | 等等 |
| [02:24] | I can’t believe I won a beach ball. | 真不敢相信我竟然中了个沙滩球 |
| [02:27] | I’ve never won anything. | 我这辈子都没中过奖 |
| [02:28] | Yeah, it’s all yours. | 这下全是你的了 |
| [02:29] | You just need to sign these documents | 劳驾签一下这份文件吧 |
| [02:31] | in case of any possible injury caused by the beach ball. | 以防你被这球弄伤 |
| [02:37] | Dad, you’re not gonna believe this! | 老爸 你绝对不会相信 |
| [02:43] | A beach ball, Jimmy? | 就为了个沙滩球 吉米 |
| [02:44] | You can get one of those for free at a concert | 只要你跑得够快 |
| [02:46] | if you can snatch it out of the air and run fast enough! | 你完全可以在音乐会上免费捞个回来 |
| [02:49] | I told you not to answer the door after | 早告诉你在耶和华见证会后 |
| [02:51] | we got you back from the Jehovah’s Witnesses! | 别随便开门了 |
| [02:52] | Kelly, can you bring me some aspirin? | 凯莉 给我拿点阿司匹林进来 |
| [02:55] | Wally, you gotta shut this movie down! | 沃利 你必须阻止这部电影上映 |
| [02:57] | It opens tomorrow night! | 明天就要公映了 |
| [02:58] | If the whole world sees this, | 要是被全世界人看到 |
| [03:00] | we’re gonna to be famous in the bad way, | 我们可就臭名昭著了 |
| [03:02] | like that no-name actor from Lost | 堪比《迷失》里那个 |
| [03:04] | who married that 16-year-old girl. | 娶了16岁女孩的无名氏 |
| [03:16] | I slept with my assistant last night. | 我昨晚睡了我的助理 |
| [03:19] | That’s gonna make things awkward around here. | 搞得现在气氛好尴尬 |
| [03:22] | Forget about what people think of us. | 就算不关别人怎么想我们 |
| [03:24] | What about Hope? I mean, the whole world now knows | 可喜旺怎么办 这下全世界都知道 |
| [03:26] | she’s the daughter of a serial killer. | 她是杀人犯的女儿了 |
| [03:28] | And the guy playing me makes me look like I have a paunch. | 还有演我那男人竟然顶着个啤酒肚 |
| [03:31] | Well, that would be upsetting | 这点真是不可理喻 |
| [03:32] | because your abs are dynamite. | 瞧你的小腹多健美 |
| [03:34] | But they have your signature. | 可他们有你亲手签下的名 |
| [03:37] | There’s nothing I can do. | 我真的无能为力 |
| [03:41] | Now, if there was something wrong with your beach ball… | 除非在那个沙滩球上动动脑筋 |
| [03:44] | No. | 不要 |
| [03:46] | It was awesome. | 那个可好玩了 |
| [03:48] | Well, the Natesvle Times has weighed in. | 那什维尔晚报也来瞎掺和 |
| [03:50] | “Chances are you’ll enjoy laughing at these imbeciles.” | 给自己一个疯狂嘲笑傻瓜的机会 |
| [03:53] | Which I thought was okay | 本来还觉得没什么问题 |
| [03:55] | till I looked up the word “Imbeciles.” | 但一看到傻瓜两个字 |
| [03:56] | Not good. | 我就很不爽 |
| [04:08] | Well, Hope’s asleep and waiting for Santa. | 喜旺睡着了 等着圣诞老人的到来 |
| [04:11] | Does anybody want to go get a tree? | 咱去买棵树吧 |
| [04:13] | I feel like stringing lights up | 我觉得把彩灯挂在那上面 |
| [04:15] | on something a bit safer than a bathtub. | 比挂浴缸里安全些 |
| [04:19] | Apparently, that operator I called this morning wasn’t able | 难怪昨天那个接线员怎么都 |
| [04:21] | to get our names out of the phone books because now we got | 听不清我们的名字 |
| [04:24] | a bunch lookie-loos gawking at our house! | 都怪门口那些看热闹的 |
| [04:27] | Hey, you wanna take a picture of something?! | 想拍照是吧 |
| [04:30] | Take a picture of this! | 拍个够吧 |
| [04:32] | I wouldn’t go out there, Jimmy. | 打死我也不出去 吉米 |
| [04:33] | Someone might try to convince you | 怕有人会想跟你 |
| [04:35] | to trade our house for a yo-yo. | 用溜溜球换这栋房子 |
| [04:37] | Oh, fine, I get it. I’m stupid! | 好了 知道啦 我最蠢 |
| [04:39] | Yes! And now, thanks to you, | 没错 多亏了你 |
| [04:41] | everyone’s gonna believe the nonsense in that movie | 全世界都会相信电影里的屁话 |
| [04:43] | and think we’re trash. | 当我们是废柴 |
| [04:45] | Move over, Burt, I want in on this. | 过去点 伯特 我也来 |
| [04:47] | It’s not just me. | 不全是我的错 |
| [04:48] | We’re all stupid! | 我们都很二 |
| [04:50] | You guys are always doing stupid stuff like… | 你们不也老是做蠢事 |
| [04:52] | Like what? | 比如说 |
| [04:53] | Name something. | 你说啊 |
| [04:56] | The Christmas lights in the tub? | 你们把圣诞彩灯挂浴缸里 |
| [04:59] | Ah, you already said that. Admit it, you’re the dumb one | 这条已经说过了 承认吧 |
| [05:01] | for selling the movie people your rights. | 卖了著作权的你才是最二的 |
| [05:03] | It’s not my fault. I’m your kid. | 不能怪我 我可是你们的儿子 |
| [05:04] | If I’m dumb, it’s because I’ve got you guy-ses “D” And “A”. | 我的二也遗传自你们的D&A |
| [05:07] | I’m getting a tree! | 买树去咯 |
| [05:10] | I just had the most invigorating bath. | 我刚洗了个超爽的澡 |
| [05:15] | Oh, man… | 天哪 |
| [05:19] | Hey, what are you guys doing?! | 干嘛呢你们 |
| [05:21] | You promised me you weren’t gonna see the movie! | 说好不看这部电影的 |
| [05:23] | To be fair, we never thought you’d find out. | 坦白说 真没想到会被你逮个正着 |
| [05:27] | Sorry, James. It looks funny. | 抱歉 詹姆士 电影看上去挺有意思的 |
| [05:30] | I did it for employee morale. | 正好给员工们打打气 |
| [05:32] | Not yours, of course. | 当然 不包括你 |
| [05:33] | If you were anyone but you, you’d understand. | 设身处地想想 你就明白了 |
| [05:35] | Guys, I got a purse full of licorice… | 伙计们 我带了好多甘草糖 |
| [05:39] | Ooh! Mama mia! | 妈妈咪呀 |
| [05:41] | A-what-a Christmas is this! | 多美妙的圣诞节啊 |
| [05:44] | I got to go to make-a de pizza. | 我要去做个披萨 |
| [05:50] | You think he bought that? | 你们觉得他被我忽悠过去了吗 |
| [06:02] | my friends are jerks… | 我的朋友都是混蛋 |
| [06:05] | and now my daughter’s gonna be | 我女儿要变成 |
| [06:06] | the laughingstock of the whole country! | 全国的笑柄了 |
| [06:08] | Your singing is the only thing I haven’t screwed up! | 你的歌声是我唯一没搞砸的 |
| [06:14] | And now I screwed that up by talking… | 现在我要出手了 |
| [06:22] | Thanks, Clarence. | 谢谢 克拉伦斯 |
| [06:26] | I have some announcements to make! | 我有话要说 |
| [06:32] | Drunk Santa… | 醉醺醺的圣诞老人 |
| [06:35] | karaoke guy… | 麦霸 |
| [06:38] | feel good because you have made good decisions in life. | 真高兴你们对人生做出的选择 |
| [06:42] | And I did not. Why? | 可我却没得选 为什么 |
| [06:44] | Because I made sex with a serial killer named Lucy | 因为我和一个叫露西的连环杀手 |
| [06:49] | in the back of my van, and now my life blows! | 在车后箱上了床 从此人生一蹶不振 |
| [06:54] | Things would have been so much better | 要是那晚我没上露西 |
| [06:56] | if hadn’t picked up Lucy in my van that night. | 我的生活将截然不同 |
| [06:58] | You hear that, disgusting Santa? | 听到了吗 恶心的圣诞老人 |
| [07:01] | I wish I had never picked up Lucy in my van! | 我真希望那晚没在车里上了露西 |
| [07:06] | Now, if you’ll excuse me. | 抱歉 请允许我 |
| [07:28] | Hey, where’s Hope’s crib? | 喜旺的小床呢 |
| [07:32] | Where’s my necklace? | 我的项链呢 |
| [07:34] | Your wish came true. | 你的愿望实现了 |
| [07:37] | You never picked up Lucy, so she never got pregnant, | 你从没遇见过露西 她也没怀孕 |
| [07:40] | and you don’t have a daughter. | 你也没有女儿 |
| [07:42] | What?! | 什么 |
| [07:43] | It’s a Christmas miracle! | 圣诞神迹哟 |
| [07:49] | Okay, Maw Maw, seriously, where’s Hope? | 行了 曾奶奶 说实话 喜旺呢 |
| [07:52] | Where’s all her stuff? | 她的东西呢 |
| [07:53] | I told you, there is no Hope. | 告诉你啦 没有什么喜旺 |
| [07:55] | Ma?! Dad?! | 妈 爹 |
| [07:59] | Mom? | 妈 |
| [08:02] | Why is there a shower curtain hanging in here? | 浴帘怎么挂在这里了 |
| [08:05] | Because your parents are separated | 因为你父母离婚了 |
| [08:06] | and Burt can’t afford a new place. | 伯特没钱租新地方 |
| [08:09] | Mom! Dad! | 妈 爹 |
| [08:12] | Maw Maw’s acting batty and she hid Hope again! | 曾奶奶又不正常了 她把喜旺藏起来了 |
| [08:15] | Don’t turn on the oven! | 千万别开烤箱 |
| [08:19] | Mom?! Dad?! | 妈 爹 |
| [08:21] | Stop yelling! | 嚎啥呢 |
| [08:22] | You’re not the only one who got hammered last night. | 昨天晚上又不止你一个喝醉的 |
| [08:25] | Oh, Mom, you’re huge! | 妈 你好肥 |
| [08:28] | Are you having an allergic reaction or something? | 你是过敏还怎么地了 |
| [08:32] | Yeah, I’m allergic to fast food. | 是啊 我对快餐过敏 |
| [08:34] | If I eat more than 350 chicken nuggets in a day, | 要是我一天吃上350多个鸡块 |
| [08:37] | I blow up like a balloon. | 就会像气球一样膨胀 |
| [08:40] | What are you doing? You quit smoking. | 干嘛呢你 你戒烟了啊 |
| [08:44] | Yep, three minutes ago. | 没错 3分钟以前 |
| [08:45] | And now I’m starting again. | 现在我又抽上了 |
| [08:48] | Hmm. You be a dear, will ya? | 你会乖乖的吧 |
| [08:49] | Get me a new cough rag. | 给我找块新手帕来 |
| [08:51] | I can’t find the white spot on this one anywhere. | 我找不到有白色波点的那块了 |
| [08:56] | Remember, you wished you never slept with Lucy. | 记住 你许愿希望从没上过露西 |
| [08:59] | Well, you got your wish, | 愿望实现了 |
| [09:00] | which means you didn’t have Hope, | 就是说你也没有喜旺 |
| [09:03] | so she didn’t need to quit smoking. | 所以她没必要戒烟 |
| [09:07] | Hey, Jimmy, check it out! | 嘿 吉米 快来看 |
| [09:11] | I got a hottie’s digits! | 我拿到靓妹的号码啦 |
| [09:12] | Read it and weep, cow. | 大声念出来 哭去吧 |
| [09:15] | 555 “555”? | |
| [09:18] | It’s fake. It’s a TV phone number. | 假的 那是电视台的号码 |
| [09:20] | So? Maybe Jane D.’s so hot she’s on TV. | 那又怎样 无名美女可能上电视了呢 |
| [09:23] | Well, good for you. | 行 祝你好运 |
| [09:25] | Just make sure you buy her flowers when you pick her up | 记得你去”滚开街123号”接她的时候 |
| [09:27] | at “123 Go Away Street.” | 带上鲜花 |
| [09:30] | Well, at least I’m out there meeting people. | 至少我有出去约会呢 |
| [09:32] | I’m not spending my days on the couch having | 我才不会像某人整天窝在沙发里 |
| [09:34] | a threesome with Ben and Jerry. | 意淫着跟本和杰瑞3P呢 |
| [09:38] | All part of your wish. | 都是你的愿望哦 |
| [09:40] | I never wished for them to be miserable like this. | 我从没想过要他们这么悲惨 |
| [09:44] | Without Hope in your life, you had no purpose, no direction. | 没有了喜旺 你的生活没有目标 没有方向 |
| [09:48] | You quit your part-time job. | 你辞了你的兼职 |
| [09:50] | You became a full-time loser. | 成了一个全职废柴 |
| [09:55] | And as you soon learned, | 而且你很快发现 |
| [09:56] | being a full-time loser didn’t pay very well, | 全职废柴的薪水可不咋地 |
| [09:59] | so you resorted to a life of crime… | 于是你走上了犯罪的道路 |
| [10:02] | which resulted in you getting two prison tattoos | 结果你身上有两枚监狱纹身 |
| [10:04] | and an addiction to toilet wine. | 还喝闷酒上瘾 |
| [10:09] | Instead of having a cute baby to bond over, | 没有了可爱宝宝的亲密约束 |
| [10:12] | your parents argued all the time, | 你父母整天吵架 |
| [10:14] | blaming each other for the mess you became. | 因为你的不长进而互相指责 |
| [10:17] | No, this can’t be true. | 不 不可能是真的 |
| [10:18] | Maybe I’m still dreaming. | 可能我还在做梦吧 |
| [10:22] | Oh, this is just like that movie Inception. | 就像电影《盗梦空间》里的一样 |
| [10:24] | I have absolutely no idea what’s going on. | 我完全不知道发生了什么 |
| [10:26] | Why are you standing in the middle of the room talking | 你干嘛站在屋子当中像个疯子一样 |
| [10:28] | to yourself like a crazy person? | 自言自语 |
| [10:29] | I’m not crazy. I’m just talking to Maw Maw. | 我没疯 我在跟曾奶奶说话呢 |
| [10:31] | Oh, so you’re talking to ghosts now? | 那你就是在跟鬼魂说话啦 |
| [10:34] | If I still loved you, this would be very disappointing. | 我要是还爱你 现在肯定失望透顶 |
| [10:38] | Oh, did I not mention I’m dead? | 我没说我已经死了吗 |
| [10:39] | That’s your fault, too. | 这也是你的错 |
| [10:41] | It was the night your mother sent you out for ice cream. | 那晚 你妈派你出去买冰激凌 |
| [10:44] | Instead of a cold sugary treat… | 你没带回来美味的甜食 |
| [10:45] | Help! | 救命 |
| [10:47] | you brought home a cold-blooded killer. | 却带回来一个冷血的杀人狂魔 |
| [10:53] | You’re like a hero. | 你就是英雄 |
| [10:56] | Well, this is fantastic. | 真是太棒了 |
| [10:58] | But since you didn’t pick up Lucy, | 但是 既然你没让露西上车 |
| [11:00] | of course, none of that happened. | 当然 什么都没发生 |
| [11:07] | So, you gave an old lady treats filled with choking hazards. | 于是 你给一老太太很多冰激凌导致她窒息身亡 |
| [11:14] | Truth is, you did me a favor. | 事实上 你帮了我一大忙 |
| [11:16] | Oh, heaven’s great. | 天堂真是棒极了 |
| [11:17] | Though it’s awfully hot there. | 尽管那里热得离谱 |
| [11:19] | There are a lot of fires everywhere… | 到处都是火焰 |
| [11:20] | And last night at karaoke? | 昨天晚上在KTV |
| [11:22] | Idi Amin and Hitler did a great version of | 乌干达的暴君阿敏和希特勒 |
| [11:24] | “Ebony and Ivory.” | 可是大秀了一番《最佳拍档》 |
| [11:26] | No, no, no. | 不 不 不 |
| [11:28] | Jimmy, I need somebody to shave me down, oil me up, | 吉米 我得有人对我顶礼膜拜 为我涂油 |
| [11:31] | and take some sexy pics for my online dating profile. | 然后为我的网上交友信息上加点性感照片 |
| [11:34] | This isn’t happening. | 这不是真的 |
| [11:35] | None of this is happening! | 一切都不是真的 |
| [11:37] | I gotta get out of here. | 我得离开这里 |
| [11:40] | Hey, porky, get out here and stand next to me for a picture. | 肥佬 赶紧过来 站我边上一起拍个照 |
| [11:44] | I want to look skinny for my online dating profile. | 我交友信息上的照片可得显得苗条诱人 |
| [12:02] | No. | 才不 |
| [12:15] | Barney’s new girlfriend is really into money. | 巴尼的新女友爱钱爱得发狂 |
| [12:18] | She made him buy this place and change it into this. | 她逼他买下了这里 改装成了这样 |
| [12:22] | Nothing makes more money than sexy girls selling liquor. | 没有什么比性感女郎卖酒更来钱了 |
| [12:27] | Would you like me to lick your shoes? | 要我舔你的鞋吗 |
| [12:28] | I’ll do anything for booze | 我愿为喝酒做任何事 |
| [12:31] | If you want to cop a feel-a | 如果你愿意一试 |
| [12:33] | Just buy me cheap tequila. | 就给我买杯龙舌兰 |
| [12:36] | What happened to Shelley? | 雪莉怎么了 |
| [12:39] | You did. | 你干的好事 |
| [12:41] | ‘Cause you didn’t have Hope, you never brought those parents | 因为你没有喜旺 你就没让那些上私立学校的家长 |
| [12:45] | from that snobby private school to save day care. | 把孩子送去日托所 |
| [12:47] | Then she started stealing medicine | 于是她开始偷窃 |
| [12:49] | from old people and dogs. | 老人和孩子的药 |
| [12:51] | Now she’s hooked on cheap wine, | 现在她喝着廉价的酒 |
| [12:54] | stool softeners, and… | 偷柔软剂 |
| [12:56] | heart-worm pills. | 还有救心丸 |
| [13:01] | What the hell? | 什么乱七八糟的 |
| [13:03] | Without you working with him, Frank became mayor. | 没有你与他一起共事 弗兰克成了市长 |
| [13:14] | I’m thinking of running for mayor. | 我想去竞选市长 |
| [13:16] | That’s stupid. | 傻透了 |
| [13:17] | Yeah, you’re right. | 是啊 你说得对 |
| [13:21] | Is that Sabrina? | 那是塞布丽娜吗 |
| [13:23] | 85% of that girl is what you remember as Sabrina. | 那姑娘的85%还是你记忆中的塞布丽娜 |
| [13:28] | Hey, Sabrina. | 好啊 塞布丽娜 |
| [13:30] | It’s Sapphire now. | 现在是塞芙尔 |
| [13:36] | Ten bucks to see ’em, $20 to feel ’em, | 10块让你看一眼 20块让你摸一把 |
| [13:38] | 50 bucks for the greatest motorboat of your life. | 50块钱让你体验这辈子最棒的汽艇 |
| [13:39] | No, it’s me… uh, uh… Jimmy. | 不 是我 是吉米 |
| [13:42] | Well, I’ll tell you what, Jimmy. | 我告诉你吧 吉米 |
| [13:43] | You’re cute. | 你很可爱 |
| [13:44] | I’ll tell you what you can get for 100 bucks. | 让我来告诉你100块能让你得到什么 |
| [13:49] | ATM’s in the corner. | 自动提款机就在拐角 |
| [13:50] | Think about it, hmm? | 好好考虑下 |
| [13:55] | Working in a dump like this really changed Sabrina. | 在这种地方工作真的让塞布丽娜变了 |
| [13:59] | Course, it’d still be good old Howdy’s | 当然 要不是巴尼的新女朋友 |
| [14:01] | if it weren’t for Barney’s new girlfriend. | 毫迪超市还会是老样子 |
| [14:03] | Which is also your fault. | 这也要怪你 |
| [14:05] | Well, how could that possibly be my fault? | 这怎么可能是我的错 |
| [14:07] | Where is my boyfriend? | 我的男朋友呢 |
| [14:08] | Barney’s girlfriend is Lucy? | 巴尼的新女友是露西 |
| [14:10] | Right here, sweetie. | 在这里呢 宝贝儿 |
| [14:11] | I ran out of money again. | 我又没钱了 |
| [14:16] | Since you didn’t sleep with her, | 因为你没有上她 |
| [14:18] | and Virginia didn’t knock her out with the TV, | 维吉妮亚也没用电视把她打昏 |
| [14:21] | she never got caught, | 她就从没被抓 |
| [14:22] | and was free to find other prey. | 可以自由寻找别的受害者 |
| [14:24] | Other prey? | 别的受害者 |
| [14:26] | Oh, my God, she’s going to kill him. | 天哪 她会杀了他的 |
| [14:28] | Good. Never been a fan. | 很好 从来就不喜欢他 |
| [14:30] | But if you like him so much, call the cops. Although… | 可如果你很喜欢他 那就报警 但是 |
| [14:33] | if you want your daughter, better get Lucy pregnant first. | 如果你想要你的女儿 就最好先让露西怀孕 |
| [14:36] | You’re right. | 你说得对 |
| [14:37] | I gotta knock her up. | 我得让她怀上孩子 |
| [14:54] | What are you still doing here, dirtbag? | 你还在这儿干嘛 土包子 |
| [14:56] | You looking to rob the place? | 想打劫吗 |
| [14:59] | What are you looking at her for? | 你看她干嘛 |
| [15:01] | You think she’s prettier than me? | 你觉得她比我辣 |
| [15:02] | Huh? | 是吗 |
| [15:03] | Think these were a waste of money? | 你觉得钱花我身上是浪费了 |
| [15:05] | No, no! They’re worth every penny! | 不不 花你身上绝对是物超所值 |
| [15:06] | Please, I need your help. | 拜托 我需要你帮忙 |
| [15:08] | Why would I help you? | 我凭什么要帮你 |
| [15:09] | Because underneath that 30 pounds of | 因为我知道在那对完美的 |
| [15:11] | perfectly molded silicone, | 硅胶假奶后 |
| [15:12] | I know there’s the heart of a good person. | 你仍有着一颗火热的心 |
| [15:15] | God, I wish I had $20. | 天 真希望我有20块 |
| [15:18] | That was the nicest thing anybody’s said to me in years. | 这是这些年来男人对我说过的最动人的话了 |
| [15:22] | What do you need me to do? | 你要我怎么做 |
| [15:26] | Are you a good enough shot to just miss somebody? | 你枪法好吗 能不能保证打不中目标 |
| [15:31] | Hey, Lucy. | 露西 |
| [15:34] | I just found out you’re “The Boyfriend Killer.” | 我知道你就是那个男友杀手了 |
| [15:44] | Help! Help! | 救命 救命 |
| [15:49] | Drive! Drive, drive, drive, drive, drive! | 开车 开车 开车 快开车 |
| [16:01] | Do you have a condom? | 有套吗 |
| [16:03] | I’m so not getting pregnant. | 我可不想怀孕 |
| [16:05] | Uh… I’ll be careful. | 我会小心的 |
| [16:06] | I’m not taking any chances. | 我可不冒这个险 |
| [16:08] | I got off all my meds a few wes ago… | 几周前 我停用了所有药物 |
| [16:10] | birth control pills, antidepressants, | 避孕的 抗抑郁的 |
| [16:12] | anti-psychotics, mood stabilizers… | 抗精神病的 稳定情绪的… |
| [16:14] | I’m actually feeling a lot more clear-headed these days. | 我最近真觉得头脑清醒多了 |
| [16:17] | Now go get a damn condom! | 所以赶紧去弄个套来 |
| [16:21] | Open the drawer… | 打开抽屉 |
| [16:23] | dig around… | 到处找找 |
| [16:24] | close the drawer. | 关上抽屉 |
| [16:27] | Open the cabinet… | 打开橱柜 |
| [16:29] | What are you doing? | 你干嘛呢 |
| [16:31] | I’m just trying to figure out how long it would take for me | 我只想试试要花多久 |
| [16:33] | to realistically be looking for a condom. | 才能让我找套套的行动显得真实 |
| [16:34] | Well, at least one of us is having sex… | 好吧 起码咱家还有人能有性生活 |
| [16:36] | with other people, I mean. | 我是说 不用自己动手的 |
| [16:39] | Say, Jimmy, do any of your no-good, punk friends | 我说 吉米 你那些废柴朋友 |
| [16:44] | feel like doing an old gal a favor? | 有没有愿意帮大妈一把的 |
| [16:45] | I’ll ask around. | 我会去问问的 |
| [16:56] | Whoa, whoa! What the hell are you doing? | 不是吧 你干嘛呢 |
| [16:59] | Sorry, he’s kind of hot for an old guy. | 对不起 作为一个蜀黍 他算迷人的了 |
| [17:01] | Dad, I was hooking up with her. | 爹 我正准备上她呢 |
| [17:02] | I just went to look for a condom. | 我只不过先去找个套套而已 |
| [17:04] | Oh, good. Hand it over. | 太好了 给我先 |
| [17:06] | – She looks iffy. – You smell like beef jerky. | -以免她等下反悔 -你一股牛肉干味儿 |
| [17:07] | Oh, that’s just the van, baby. | 是车的味道 宝贝 |
| [17:09] | Dad, would you get out of here? | 爹 你让让行不行 |
| [17:10] | – I had her first. – Well, I have her now. | -是我先搞到她的 -可她现在在我手里啊 |
| [17:13] | All right, you guys decide. I’m gonna go to the bathroom. | 够了 你们先决定好吧 我要去趟厕所 |
| [17:15] | And maybe raid the kitchen. | 也许顺便去厨房扫荡一圈 |
| [17:17] | I kind of got a hankering for beef jerky. | 我有点想吃牛肉干了 |
| [17:19] | You can’t have sex with her. I need to. | 你不能上她 我得上她 |
| [17:22] | Well, I don’t want to. | 我不想让 |
| [17:23] | You want to have a pose-off? | 想比比吗 |
| [17:24] | Top this. | 超越这个再说 |
| [17:26] | I’m telling Mom about this. | 我要告诉老妈 |
| [17:28] | Mom! | 妈 |
| [17:30] | Mom! Mom! | 妈 老妈 |
| [17:32] | Dad’s trying to hook up with the girl I like | 老爸在后院 |
| [17:34] | right here in the yard. | 他想上我喜欢的姑娘 |
| [17:36] | I don’t care. Long as he doesn’t do it on my side of the bed. | 我不在乎 只要他不在我这边的床上干就行 |
| [17:38] | Well, that’s fine. | 好啊 |
| [17:40] | I was thinking about using the hammock. | 我准备用吊床 |
| [17:41] | Remember the days you wouldn’t break the hammock? | 还记得你当年撑不破吊床的年华么 |
| [17:43] | Dad, you don’t understand how important this is. | 老爸 你不明白这有多重要 |
| [17:45] | There’s only one way to decide who gets her. | 只有一个办法能决定谁去上她了 |
| [17:47] | Rock, paper, scissors. | 石头剪子布 |
| [17:49] | I want in on this, too. | 我也要参加 |
| [17:51] | I’m sick of men. | 我受够男的了 |
| [18:03] | Thank you, Dan, my newly appointed | 谢谢 丹 我的新任 |
| [18:06] | Secretary of Alarm Sounds. | 警铃秘书 |
| [18:08] | My fellow Natesvillians, | 亲爱的那什维尔人民 |
| [18:10] | we have identified “The Boyfriend Killer.” | 我们已查明了男友杀手的身份 |
| [18:13] | Her name is Lucy Carlyle. | 她的名字是露西·卡拉尔 |
| [18:15] | If you should encounter the suspect, | 如果你有嫌犯的消息 |
| [18:18] | remember, she may look sweet, | 记住 她也许长相甜美 |
| [18:19] | but she is extremely dangerous. | 但实际却极度危险 |
| [18:25] | You guys are out of toilet paper and painkillers. | 你的厕纸和止痛片用光了 |
| [18:30] | No! I’ll never get Hope back! | 不 我永远也找不回喜旺了 |
| [18:32] | No…! | 不 |
| [18:55] | Merry Christmas, drunk Santa! | 圣诞快乐 醉醺醺的圣诞老人 |
| [18:57] | Merry Christmas, public domain karaoke singer! | 圣诞快乐 麦霸 |
| [19:04] | Merry Christmas, Natesville! | 圣诞快乐 那什维尔 |
| [19:09] | Merry Christmas, Dancin’ Dan! | 圣诞快乐 跳舞丹 |
| [19:11] | It’s Christmas? | 今天是圣诞节么 |
| [19:12] | Merry Christmas, movie theater! | 圣诞快乐 电影院 |
| [19:14] | Merry Christmas, people who I thought were my friends but | 圣诞快乐 那些我以为是朋友 |
| [19:17] | are inside the movie theater! | 但却抛下我自己跑去电影院的人 |
| [19:22] | Merry Christmas, uneven sidewalk! | 圣诞快乐 凹凸不平的人行道 |
| [19:30] | Merry Christmas, Mom and Dad! | 圣诞快乐 老爸老妈 |
| [19:32] | Where’s Hope? | 喜旺呢 |
| [19:35] | She was asleep. | 刚才还在睡呢 |
| [19:37] | It’s 10:30 at night, what’s wrong with you? | 都晚上十点半了 你咋回事啊 |
| [19:38] | That’s our Christmas tree? | 那是咱家的圣诞树么 |
| [19:40] | What, did you mug Charlie Brown? | 咋的 遇上查理·布朗了不成 |
| [19:44] | Hope! Oh, I’m so glad you’re here. | 喜旺 真高兴你在 |
| [19:45] | And Maw Maw, you’re alive! | 还有曾奶奶 你还活着 |
| [19:48] | Of course I’m alive. | 老娘当然还活着 |
| [19:49] | Heaven’s gonna have to wait a little bit longer for me. | 天堂得再等我一阵子才行 |
| [19:52] | Yeah, yeah, heaven. | 是啊是啊 天堂 |
| [19:53] | I’m so sorry I called you guys stupid. | 真抱歉我之前说你们是二货 |
| [19:56] | I’m glad I grew up in a stupid house. | 我真高兴我成长在一个二货的家庭里 |
| [19:58] | Every stupid decision I’ve made in life has led to great things. | 我做的每一个二货的决定都有了美好的结果 |
| [20:00] | I mean, I wouldn’t have Hope if I wasn’t an idiot. | 我是说 如果我不二 就不会有喜旺了 |
| [20:02] | And I wouldn’t trade her for anything. | 金山银山也换不来我的小喜旺 |
| [20:05] | I’m just glad I’m back in reality. | 真高兴我回到现实中来了 |
| [20:08] | Hey. | 你好 |
| [20:11] | Well, there are a couple of things I miss. | 好吧 看来我错过了一些事啊 |
| [20:13] | I thought you guys were at the movies. | 我还以为你们去看电影了 |
| [20:15] | We left early. | 我们早退了 |
| [20:19] | Can you believe these morons actually live in our town? | 你能相信么 这些白痴居然真的生活在我们周围 |
| [20:22] | I don’t even feel sorry for the real baby | 我都不替那孩子感到遗憾了 |
| [20:24] | because she’s probably just as stupid as the rest of them. | 她很有可能跟她的白痴家人们一样蠢 |
| [20:26] | I can’t sit and listen to this anymore. | 我没法再坐在这里听下去了 |
| [20:28] | We’ve gotta do something. | 我们得做点什么 |
| [20:30] | I know there’s some historical precedence | 我知道通常来说 |
| [20:31] | for not doing this, but… | 最好什么都别做 但是… |
| [20:33] | Fire! | 着火啦 |
| [20:36] | Wow. | 哇哦 |
| [20:38] | You guys are good friends. | 你们真是我的好朋友 |
| [20:39] | I mean, you would’ve been great friends if you hadn’t | 我是说 如果我当时叫你们别去看电影时 |
| [20:41] | gone to the movies when I asked you not to. | 你们没去的话 就能算是我的死党了 |
| [20:43] | But I’m glad you’re here. | 但还是很高兴你们来了 |
| [20:44] | I wouldn’t worry about that movie, Jimmy. | 换我的话就不会担心那电影 吉米 |
| [20:46] | A poor family raising a serial killer’s baby? | 一个穷人家庭养了个连环杀手的孩子 |
| [20:49] | Not many people are gonna want to watch that. | 不会有很多人想看的 |
| [20:51] | At least not in my demographic. | 起码在我的统计表里不会的 |
| [20:54] | I wasn’t going to be able to protect Hope from the reality | 我不打算隐瞒喜旺 |
| [20:58] | of how she came to be in this world. | 她来到这世上的真相 |
| [21:00] | What happened, happened. | 发生的一切 已经发生了 |
| [21:02] | And nothing was going to change that. | 这是无法改变的 |
| [21:04] | And I wouldn’t change it, for anything in the world. | 我也不会为了任何东西去试图改变这一切 |
| [21:07] | Maybe me spending most of Christmas Eve | 也许我的大部分圣诞节 |
| [21:09] | passed out in a bar deprived Hope | 都会把喜旺留在家里 自己去酒吧里 |
| [21:11] | of seeing that Jimmy Stewart movie everyone loves | 看着人人都喜欢的吉米·斯图尔特的电影 |
| [21:13] | for another year, but at least I could teach Hope | 喝到不省人事 但我起码可以教给喜旺 |
| [21:15] | the lesson I learned: | 我学到的一课 |
| [21:17] | You can’t worry about how the whole world sees you… | 不要担心世界是如何看你的 |
| [21:20] | It only matters how the people in your world see you. | 你在乎的人如何看你 那才是最重要的 |
| [21:26] | Oh, and don’t ever sign for a beach ball. | 哦还有 别随便为了沙滩球签名了 |