| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:05] | What are you guys doing? | 你们在干嘛 |
| [00:06] | I thought you were taking Hope to the park. | 不是说要带喜旺去公园的吗 |
| [00:07] | It’s too hot. | 热死人了 |
| [00:10] | I can’t believe you guys are so lazy. | 你们居然能懒成这样 |
| [00:12] | We’re not lazy, we just… | 不是懒 只是 |
| [00:14] | I don’t have the energy to argue with you. | 懒得跟你争 |
| [00:16] | She’s having fun. | 她不是玩得挺高兴的 |
| [00:18] | We did this kind of stuff with you, and you loved it. | 你也是这么被带大的 你笑得可欢了 |
| [00:20] | It’s smart parenting. | 这叫智能育儿 |
| [00:22] | Like, why would you drag a tent out to the forest | 比如在客厅挂根毯子就成了帐篷 |
| [00:25] | when you can build one with blankets in your own living room? | 何必非要拖到森林里去搭呢 |
| [00:28] | Can I come out now? | 我能出去了吗 |
| [00:30] | Not yet, buddy. | 还不行啊 小鬼 |
| [00:31] | Daddy’s still fighting the bear. | 老爸还在和熊搏斗 |
| [00:35] | And why spend all day standing in lines at the museum | 而且家里有这么多老古董 |
| [00:38] | when we’ve got plenty of old stuff right here in the house? | 何必要排长队去博物馆呢 |
| [00:41] | And this is what ladies used to wear in the ’40s and ’50s. | 这就是四五十年代的时尚女装啊 |
| [00:44] | They had no sense of style like we do today. | 比起咱 她们品味真是差到爆 |
| [00:48] | Or when you wanted to take karate, | 而且你不是想学空手道吗 |
| [00:50] | but it would’ve been a hassle to drive two towns | 但送你去上课要横跨两个镇呢 |
| [00:52] | over to where they held the classes. | 太费神了 |
| [00:54] | Okay, grasshopper. | 好了 小力士 |
| [00:56] | Time for your kung fu lesson. | 功夫练起来 |
| [00:58] | Whatever that guy in the black pajamas does, | 那个穿黑睡衣的做什么 |
| [01:00] | you do the same, all right? | 你就跟着做什么 |
| [01:04] | You want to fight, fight me. | 想打架吗 放马过来 |
| [01:08] | You want to fight? | 想打架咩 |
| [01:11] | Fight me. | 放马过来嘛 |
| [01:12] | Look, if you want to call that “smart parenting” | 如果把那叫成”智能育儿” |
| [01:14] | to make yourselves feel better, that’s fine, | 能让你们自我感觉良好 随你们便 |
| [01:17] | but Hope is not going to grow up that way. | 但不许对喜旺来这一套 |
| [01:19] | I am taking her to a park | 我要带她去公园 |
| [01:22] | so she can have an actual outdoor experience in nature. | 让她体验真正的大自然 |
| [01:30] | Hot out there, huh? | 外面热不 |
| [01:31] | And muggy. | 闷死个人 |
| [01:33] | I wasn’t expecting the muggy. | 肿么会这么闷 |
| [01:43] | Are you sure you can do this? | 行不行啊你 |
| [01:45] | Piece of cake. | 小菜一碟 |
| [01:46] | Don’t move. | 别动 |
| [01:47] | – Don’t hit my face. – Don’t move. | -不许打脸 -别动 |
| [01:49] | Don’t hit my face. | 不许打脸 |
| [01:51] | I don’t know what you guys are doing, | 我不知道你们在干嘛 |
| [01:52] | but Hope wants to go on the swing. | 但喜旺想荡秋千了 |
| [01:54] | Oh, hold on. | 等等 |
| [01:55] | I’m dying to know if I can do this. | 我超想知道我行不行的 |
| [01:57] | Don’t hit my face. | 不许打脸 |
| [01:58] | All right. | 相信我 |
| [01:59] | Coming at you. | 来咯 |
| [02:07] | It’s okay, sweetie. | 没事的 小心肝 |
| [02:08] | Burt, go grab a dustpan, would you? | 伯特 去拿簸箕来 |
| [02:10] | Just a picture of your dad when he was a baby. | 不过是你爸小时候的照片而已 |
| [02:12] | I’m sure we can find another one around here somewhere. | 没了再找张别的就好啦 |
| [02:15] | Here, have a seat. | 来坐吧 |
| [02:17] | I really was cute as a baby. | 我小时候真可爱 |
| [02:20] | Oh, look at you. | 瞧瞧 |
| [02:22] | So cute and happy | 多可爱 多开心 |
| [02:24] | anf thinking life’s going to turn out great. | 对生活充满无限希望 |
| [02:26] | Good for you. | 真好 |
| [02:27] | Hey, it’s… it’s folded. | 还是折起来的呢 |
| [02:30] | There’s more picture. | 还有其他照片 |
| [02:33] | – Who are these people? – I have no idea. | -这些都是谁 -不知道 |
| [02:35] | Uh, that picture came with the frame. | 是相框自带的照片 |
| [02:37] | But how did I get in the picture that comes with the frame? | 我怎么会在相框自带的照片里 |
| [02:40] | Okay, we were never going to tell you this, | 本来永远都不打算告诉你的 |
| [02:42] | but, uh, when you were little, | 你小时候 |
| [02:45] | I took you to a baby modeling tryout | 我带你参加过宝宝模特的试镜 |
| [02:48] | and you got the job to be in that picture. | 他们雇你照了这张照片 |
| [02:50] | But then I saw a special on TV about Danny Bonaduce, | 但我看了部关于丹尼·布纳德斯的纪录片后 |
| [02:53] | and it scared me, so I never took you back. | 我哪还敢再让你进娱乐圈 |
| [02:56] | But you love Danny Bonaduce. | 你不是超喜欢丹尼·布纳德斯的吗 |
| [02:57] | The actor, not the person. | 只喜欢他演的角色 又不是他本人 |
| [03:00] | Don’t turn around or say anything. | 别回头 啥也别说 |
| [03:01] | Dad, who are the people in this picture? | 爸 照片里的这些人是谁 |
| [03:04] | That is me and your mother. | 是我和你妈 |
| [03:06] | Really? | 是吗 |
| [03:07] | We were never going to tell you this, | 本来永远都不打算告诉你的 |
| [03:08] | but, uh, your mom and I used to be spies. | 我和你妈以前是间谍 |
| [03:11] | That’s what we used to look like before we retired | 这是我们整容前的样子 |
| [03:13] | and the government gave us new faces. | 退休后 政府给了我们新的身份 |
| [03:15] | That, uh, older boy is a robot– ran on “C” Batteries. | 大一点的那个男孩是机器人 用二号电池 |
| [03:18] | He’s not buying it, Burt. | 这回他不会买账啦 伯特 |
| [03:20] | Ah, damn. | 见鬼 |
| [03:21] | I told you we should have thrown that picture away. | 我就说应该把那张相片扔掉吧 |
| [03:23] | But Jimmy looked so adorable, | 但吉米照得太可爱了 |
| [03:24] | and we couldn’t afford a little sailor suit. | 而且我们也买不起水手服 |
| [03:26] | So, who are these people? | 这些人是谁 |
| [03:27] | Besides, you were supposed to cut the other people | 而且你要是把其他人剪掉 |
| [03:30] | out of the picture, not fold them behind. | 而不是折到后面 不就好了 |
| [03:32] | – Cutting a picture is bad luck. – Says who? | -剪照片会倒大霉的 -谁说的 |
| [03:35] | I don’t know. People. Isn’t that a thing? | 哥不知道 别人说的 有这说法吧 |
| [03:37] | Why am I in this picture? | 我为什么会在这张照片里 |
| [03:38] | No, that’s not a thing. | 没这说法 |
| [03:40] | You know what’s bad luck? | 你知道怎样才会倒大霉吗 |
| [03:41] | Folding a picture instead of cutting it, | 把照片折起来而不是剪掉 |
| [03:44] | and then 25 years later, | 等25年之后 |
| [03:45] | having to explain to your son that he’s adopted. | 还得想法跟儿子解释他是领养的 |
| [03:47] | What? | 什么 |
| [03:48] | You have a good point. | 有道理 |
| [03:50] | I guess folding is worse. | 折起来是更闹心 |
| [03:52] | Live and learn. | 活到老学到老嘛 |
| [03:56] | I’m adopted? | 我是领养的 |
| [03:58] | Before you get mad, just give us a chance to explain. | 先别急着生气 听我们解释 |
| [04:05] | You’re not that kind of adopted. | 不是那种领养 |
| [04:07] | We are your biodegradable parents. | 我们是你的亲生父母 |
| [04:09] | Well, but then who are these people? | 那这些人是谁 |
| [04:11] | They’re Bill and Denise Jenkins, | 是詹金斯家的比尔和丹妮丝 |
| [04:12] | and they adopted you from us. | 是他们从我们这儿领养了你 |
| [04:15] | When you were born, we weren’t really prepared for the impact | 你的出生杀得我们措手不及 |
| [04:17] | it was going to have on our leisure time. | 还毁了我们的美好生活 |
| [04:29] | It was a nightmare. | 简直就是噩梦好吗 |
| [04:31] | You were a nightmare child. | 你就是个噩梦般的熊孩子 |
| [04:33] | You know the movie The Exorcist? | 知道电影《驱魔人》吧 |
| [04:35] | You cried the whole way through it. | 你能从头哭到尾 |
| [04:37] | That’s the thing about babies, Jimmy. | 小孩就是这么头大啊 吉米 |
| [04:38] | They don’t come with an instruction manual. | 出生都不带说明书的 |
| [04:41] | Someone really should write a book | 真该有人写本书 |
| [04:42] | about how to care for a baby. | 讲讲怎么育婴 |
| [04:43] | So we did what we thought was the responsible thing to do | 所以我们采取了自认为最负责任的行为 |
| [04:46] | and had an adoption agency find you a better home. | 让收养机构给你找了个更好的人家 |
| [04:49] | But after a few weeks, we kind of missed having you around. | 但几周后 我们有点想你了 |
| [04:52] | Plus, with you gone, | 而且你走了以后 |
| [04:53] | we lost our little excuse for not doing our homework. | 我们就没理由不做作业了 |
| [04:55] | So we got you back. | 所以我们又把你搞回来了 |
| [04:59] | Are you maybe a little mad that we kind of… | 你不会因为我们假装 |
| [05:03] | sort of tried to pretend it never happened? | 可能也许大概没发生过这件事而生气吧 |
| [05:08] | No, I’m not. | 不会啊 |
| [05:11] | I mean, I get it. | 我懂的 |
| [05:11] | I had the same thought when I first had Hope. | 刚开始我对喜旺也有同样的想法 |
| [05:13] | I was just a little bit older, | 只不过我比那时的你们多长了几岁 |
| [05:15] | and I was lucky ’cause I had you guys to help me. | 而且幸运地有你们帮忙 |
| [05:18] | I just can’t stop wondering | 我只是忍不住想 |
| [05:19] | what it would have been like to not be an only child. | 如果我不是独生子会怎样 |
| [05:22] | I always wanted a brother. | 我一直想有个兄弟 |
| [05:24] | So I invented one: Johnny. | 所以我”自创”了一个 强尼 |
| [05:27] | Want to do some math problems while we wait? | 与其干等着 不如做点数学题吧 |
| [05:29] | Okay. | 好啊 |
| [05:30] | – Three plus four. – Nine. | -三加四 -九 |
| [05:32] | Right. Six plus eight. | 答对了 六加八 |
| [05:34] | – 200. – Correct. | -两百 -回答正确 |
| [05:36] | You’re a genius, Jimmy. | 你真是个神童 吉米 |
| [05:37] | Thanks, Johnny. | 谢谢 强尼 |
| [05:39] | And all this time, I did have a big brother. | 原来我还真有个哥哥啊 |
| [05:42] | Almost. | “亲”哥哥 |
| [05:44] | 布拉德 三岁 查德 九个月 | |
| [05:44] | I was Chad, and he was Brad. | 我叫查德 他叫布拉德 |
| [05:47] | Brad. | 布拉德 |
| [05:49] | I’m going to go under my bed and tell Johnny about this. | 我要去床底下告诉强尼 |
| [06:04] | He took that really well. | 他接受得还挺快的嘛 |
| [06:06] | Should we tell him some of the bigger stuff? | 要不要再给他点猛料 |
| [06:07] | You mean like when I realized | 你是指当我意识到 |
| [06:08] | I’d never have a daughter, | 这辈子不能再生个女儿后 |
| [06:09] | so I dressed him like a girl for a month? | 就把他当女儿养了一个月这事吗 |
| [06:12] | I miss Jamie. | 我真想吉蜜啊 |
| [06:14] | Or when he ate a whole pack of your cigarettes | 还有 他曾吞下你的一整包香烟 |
| [06:16] | and his heart stopped for a while? | 搞得心脏都停搏了一小阵儿 |
| [06:20] | Nah, let’s not tell him. | 算了 还是别告诉他了 |
| [06:23] | There’s usually a couple good laughs | 每次他自己发现这些秘密时 |
| [06:25] | when he figures these things out on his own. | 还能当个笑话听听 |
| [06:30] | Brad? Brad? | 布拉德 布拉德吗 |
| [06:33] | Hey, Jimmy. | 吉米 |
| [06:34] | Oh, you can stop doing that. | 别再像祥林嫂一样了 |
| [06:35] | I found your almost-brother on the Internet. | 我在网上找到你的”亲”哥哥了 |
| [06:37] | Seriously? | 真的吗 |
| [06:38] | That’s him? | 就是他吗 |
| [06:39] | I’ve seen his picture on bus benches. | 我在公交车站的长椅上见过他的照片 |
| [06:41] | Oh, my God. | 我的天呐 |
| [06:42] | My almost-brother is famous. | 我的”亲”哥哥是个名人啊 |
| [06:48] | If you’re looking for a house | 如果你在找房子 |
| [06:49] | in Natesville, Natesville-adjacent | 无论是在奈特镇 还是在奈特镇的周边 |
| [06:51] | or just outside Natesville, then come see me. | 甚至奈特镇之外的地方 都来找我吧 |
| [06:54] | I’m Brad Jenkins, Real Estate Agent with the Hat. | 我是布拉德·詹金斯 头戴帽子的地产商 |
| [06:57] | Not… | 不是… |
| [06:59] | the Real Estate Agent with the Bat. | 手拿棍子的暴力地产商 |
| [07:02] | Not the Real Estate Agent with the Rat. | 也不是叼着耗子的恶心地产商 |
| [07:06] | And certainly not | 更不是 |
| [07:08] | the Real Estate Agent with the Flat. | 车轮跑气的二逼地产商 |
| [07:22] | No, I’m Brad Jenkins, | 我就是我 布拉德·詹金斯 |
| [07:24] | Real Estate Agent with the Hat. | 头戴帽子的帅气地产商 |
| [07:26] | And I’m going to find you your dream house | 我将尽心尽力帮你找到梦想家园 |
| [07:29] | because the only difference between realty | 因为我就是 |
| [07:32] | and reality is the “I.” | 连接梦想和现实的桥梁 |
| [07:35] | So, if you can find a better deal on a home, | 如果你能找到谁介绍的房子比我的好 |
| [07:39] | I will eat my hat. | 我就吃了我的帽子 |
| [07:42] | That’s him? | 就是他吗 |
| [07:43] | I’ve seen his ad at the bus stop. | 我在公交车站见过他的广告 |
| [07:45] | He looks a lot better | 他没有龋齿和犄角 |
| [07:46] | without the blacked-out teeth and the devil horns. | 看着比吉米顺眼多了 |
| [07:48] | I made an appointment with him for tomorrow. | 我约他明天见面 |
| [07:50] | We’re going to pretend that we’re selling | 我们假装要卖掉 |
| [07:51] | Sabrina’s grandmother’s house. | 塞布丽娜外婆的房子 |
| [07:52] | Why? | 为什么 |
| [07:53] | He was my brother for over three weeks. I want to meet him. | 他好歹当了我三周的哥哥 我想见见他 |
| [07:55] | So just tell him who you are | 直接告诉他你是谁 |
| [07:57] | and meet up for a beer one night. | 约他晚上出来喝一杯 不就得了 |
| [07:58] | Are you kidding? | 开什么玩笑 |
| [07:59] | He’s the Real Estate Agent with the Hat. | 他是头戴帽子的帅气地产商 |
| [08:01] | I bet someone’s coming up to him claiming | 我肯定有很多人想结识他 |
| [08:02] | to be his long-lost brother like once a week. | 谎称是他失散多年的”一星期兄弟”什么的 |
| [08:04] | I just want to hang out with him, | 我只是想约他出来玩玩 |
| [08:06] | see what he’s like. | 看看他是怎样的人 |
| [08:09] | The Real Estate Agent with the Hat. | 头戴帽子的帅气地产商 |
| [08:12] | Who would have guessed? | 谁能想到会这样呢 |
| [08:13] | That’s what I need: a gimmick. | 这也正是我所需要的 一个噱头 |
| [08:16] | Burt Chance, Landscaper with… | 伯特·吉斯 |
| [08:19] | Two… Watches. | 带着两块手表的庭院设计师 |
| [08:23] | “I’ll work double-time for you.” | “一个人 能干两份活” |
| [08:25] | I like it. Which one of these buttons do you push | 赞啊 我应该按哪个键 |
| [08:27] | to get one of those web sites? | 才能搞出来一个这样的网页 |
| [08:29] | Try one of those on the top with the little “F”S on them. | 试试顶上那些带F的键 |
| [08:31] | They seem like they do the tricky stuff. | 那些看上去比较厉害 |
| [08:39] | I was thinking, just for fun, | 我在想 为了更好玩点儿 |
| [08:41] | we should spice up our cover story about who we are. | 我们应该把身份改得劲爆些 |
| [08:43] | Like, instead of being a surgical laser salesman, | 别当卖外科激光手术仪的了 |
| [08:45] | you could be a NASCAR driver | 换成全美车协的赛车手吧 |
| [08:47] | and I could be a Southern belle. | 我呢 就扮个南方美妞 |
| [08:48] | Uh, you know, I haven’t… I haven’t, uh, traveled that much, | 你懂的 我没怎么 出过远门 |
| [08:50] | so I don’t know | 所以我也搞不清楚 |
| [08:51] | if your accents are any good, | 你的口音是不是南方口音 |
| [08:52] | and I really want to make a great first impression. | 而且我真的很想给他留个好印象 |
| [08:54] | So, just showing off the fact that you eat | 好啊 就让他看看你现在这幅德行 |
| [08:55] | your own eyebrows when you’re nervous | 一紧张就拔自己的眉毛吃 |
| [08:56] | is going to make a perfect icebreaker. | 这绝对能打破沉闷的僵局 |
| [09:03] | Oh, my God, it’s really him. | 我的天呐 他真的来了 |
| [09:05] | And he’s wearing a hat. | 还戴了帽子 |
| [09:07] | You must be Jimmy. | 你一定就是吉米了 |
| [09:09] | Yes, I am. | 是的 我是 |
| [09:10] | And, uh, this is my fiancee… | 这位是我的未婚妻 |
| [09:12] | Bridget. Pleasure to meet you, love. | 布丽吉特 见到你曾高兴 |
| [09:14] | Hey, give us a holler | 要似你想来杯茶 |
| [09:16] | if you fancy a cup of tea | 或想来个饼 |
| [09:18] | or a crumpet or perhaps a heap | 兹管告诉窝 |
| [09:19] | of fish and chips wrapped in | 就算似用《周六晚邮报》包则的 |
| [09:19] | last Saturday’s Evening Post, eh? | 鱼和薯条 我都能给你弄来 哟 |
| [09:21] | Well, okay. | 好的 |
| [09:27] | Dynamite house. | 这房子太棒了 |
| [09:29] | Man, if this place had a hat on its roof, | 哥们儿 如果这房子也戴了顶帽子的话 |
| [09:31] | it would sell itself. | 它都能把自己卖出去 |
| [09:33] | I’m just going to take a look around | 我四处看看 |
| [09:36] | and let you know what we can… | 然后给你们… |
| [09:37] | cap our listing at. | “帽”出一份清单 |
| [09:39] | Man, you really work “Hat” | 哥们儿 你真的很喜欢把”帽” |
| [09:41] | Into everything. | 代入一切语境里 |
| [09:42] | It’s what I do. | 我就是靠这个吃饭的啊 |
| [09:43] | Hey, what say me, you and your fedorable fiancee | 不如我们以及你那位神奇的未婚妻 |
| [09:48] | take my chapeau on a tour of your chateau? | 领着我的帽子在你们的城堡里转一圈吧 |
| [09:53] | “Chapeau” means hat, right? | 他在用法文说帽子是吧 |
| [09:55] | Yeah. | 没错 |
| [09:56] | I love him. | 我爱死他了 |
| [10:00] | You think, if we left Jimmy with that other family, | 你想过没 如果我们把吉米留给那家人 |
| [10:02] | he would have been better off? | 他可能混得比现在好得多 |
| [10:03] | Maybe he would have his picture on that bench? | 或许他的照片也能出现在车站长凳上 |
| [10:07] | Nah, Jimmy looks horrible in hats. | 不可能 吉米戴帽子很丑的 |
| [10:10] | That’s true. | 那倒是 |
| [10:11] | But there are lots of good jobs where you don’t need a hat. | 但许多好工作是不需要戴帽子的 |
| [10:15] | Can’t think of any right now. | 虽然我一时说不出来 |
| [10:16] | Fireman, cowboy, football player. | 消防员 牛仔 橄榄球员 |
| [10:19] | I’m telling you, all the good jobs have hats. | 早说了 好工作都要戴帽子的 |
| [10:21] | I just hope | 我只是希望 |
| [10:22] | it’s not our fault that | 吉米现在这个样子 |
| [10:23] | Jimmy turned out to be so… | 不是拜 |
| [10:26] | Jimmy. | 我们所赐… |
| [10:27] | Let’s not think about this too hard. | 别费脑子想这些了 |
| [10:29] | It’s a beautiful day. | 今天天气多好啊 |
| [10:30] | I don’t like where this is going. | 咱换个话题吧 |
| [10:34] | Okay, honey. | 好了 小宝贝 |
| [10:35] | Water park’s closed for the day. | 水上游乐园关门了 |
| [10:37] | How about we take her down to the pet store, | 我们带她去宠物店吧 |
| [10:39] | tell her it’s a zoo? | 就跟她说那是个动物园 |
| [10:40] | The Chinese restaurant has a lobster tank. | 中餐馆有个盛龙虾的水槽 |
| [10:42] | It’s only half a block away. | 就在半个街区外 |
| [10:44] | Aquarium it is. | 好 那就去”水族馆”了 |
| [10:52] | I can’t believe how much space you got in here. | 不敢相信你们房子这么大 |
| [10:54] | Yeah, it’s big enough in here to… go long. | 对 是挺大 足够从这儿扔到那儿了 |
| [10:58] | Our plan to get Brad in the house worked perfectly. | 我们让布拉德参观房子的计划进展顺利 |
| [11:02] | Now I needed to squeeze a lifetime | 现在我要把一生中欢愉的兄弟时光 |
| [11:03] | of brotherly memories into two hours. | 都压缩到这两个小时内 |
| [11:06] | I’m playing catch with my almost-brother. | 我在跟我的”亲”哥哥传球呢 |
| [11:09] | I think the house might show better | 我觉得把沙发搬那儿去 |
| [11:10] | with the couch over there. | 房间会更好看 |
| [11:12] | How much do you bench? | 你举多重的杠铃 |
| [11:13] | I don’t know, about 225, 230. | 不知道 大概225 230磅吧 |
| [11:17] | Might help if you grab the other side. | 抓一下另一边吧 |
| [11:20] | Of the couch. | 我是说沙发 |
| [11:22] | Ten feet, four inches. | 十英尺四英寸[约3.15米] |
| [11:24] | Tally-ho, wankers! | 找到啦 二货们 |
| [11:26] | Found this lift in the garage. | 在车库找到了这个梯纸 |
| [11:27] | We’re good! | 不用啦 |
| [11:31] | Yeah, I guess if it came down to it, | 如果之前都像这么顺利 |
| [11:33] | I could beat up every other | 我就可以将镇上其他地产商 |
| [11:35] | real estate agent in town. | 都打个落花流水了 |
| [11:36] | Probably helps that most of them are middle-aged women. | 如果他们大多数都是中年妇女就更好了 |
| [11:38] | You’re awesome. | 你太棒了 |
| [11:39] | This house is awesome! | 这房子太棒了 |
| [11:41] | When this thing sells, | 等这房子卖了 |
| [11:43] | you got to come over to my neighborhood in Pleasant Valley Estates. | 你真该来我们的欢乐谷地产坐坐 |
| [11:46] | There is a beautiful Tudor Revival for sale on my block. | 我负责的街区有栋漂亮的都铎复兴式房子在卖 |
| [11:50] | We could be block brothers. | 我们可以做好邻居好兄弟了 |
| [11:52] | Well, that sounds quite posh! | 听起来相当奢此啊 |
| [11:54] | Might be a little bit out of our price range, yeah? | 可能有点超过我们的承受能力了 |
| [11:56] | It’s not that pricey. | 没那么贵啦 |
| [11:59] | Course, you’d have to join the Pleasant Valley Country Club. | 你得加入欢乐谷乡村俱乐部 |
| [12:02] | There’s a, uh, open house this weekend. | 本周末是开放参观日 |
| [12:06] | My parents are on the new member committee. | 而且我爸妈负责新成员委员会 |
| [12:08] | Mom and Dad? | 老妈和老爸 |
| [12:09] | I mean, your mom and dad. | 我是说 令尊和令堂 |
| [12:10] | That would be great. | 那就太好了 |
| [12:11] | I would love to meet them. | 我太想见他们了 |
| [12:12] | Listen, I’ll just take a couple | 我要再拍一些照片 |
| [12:14] | of more pictures here for the web site, | 然后放到网站上 |
| [12:15] | and I’ll be out of your hair. | 不会给你添麻烦的 |
| [12:20] | What are you doing? | 搞什么飞机 |
| [12:21] | Didn’t you see what happened here? | 你没看到刚才温馨的一幕幕吗 |
| [12:22] | I mean, we played catch, he gave me a shoulder ride, | 我们玩传球 他让我骑在他肩上 |
| [12:25] | he told me four times that he didn’t want to wrestle. | 他跟我说了四次不想摔跤 |
| [12:27] | I mean, I finally have a big brother. | 我终于有了哥哥 |
| [12:29] | And I’m gonna meet my almost-parents. | 而且就要见我的”亲”爹妈啦 |
| [12:31] | Okay, but what are you gonna do when he finds out | 但如果被他发现 |
| [12:33] | that you’re not a wealthy surgical laser salesman | 你并不是个要卖房子的外科激光手术仪推销员 |
| [12:35] | who is selling a house? | 该怎么办 |
| [12:37] | In a few weeks, I’ll tell him | 过几周 我会告诉他 |
| [12:37] | we’re keeping the house because I got fired, | 房子不卖了 因为我被炒了 |
| [12:39] | which he’ll believe because I couldn’t answer | 他肯定会相信 因为我根本不懂 |
| [12:41] | any of his questions about surgery or lasers. | 手术啊 激光啊什么的 |
| [12:45] | He’s amazing. | 他帅呆了 |
| [12:45] | He is amazing. | 他酷毙了 |
| [12:47] | – Who? – Oh, my almost-brother. | -谁 -我的”亲”哥哥 |
| [12:49] | And I hope you’re not mad, | 希望你们不要生气 |
| [12:50] | but he invited me to Pleasant Valley Country Club | 但他邀请我去欢乐谷乡村俱乐部 |
| [12:52] | to meet with my almost-parents. | 去见我的”亲”爹妈 |
| [12:54] | Pleasant Valley Country Club? | 欢乐谷乡村俱乐部 |
| [12:55] | That place is crazy expensive. | 那里贵爆了 |
| [12:58] | Now it all makes sense. | 这下就全说得通了 |
| [12:59] | Of course the Real Estate Agent with the Hat | 怪不得那个头戴帽子的地产商 |
| [13:01] | turned out better than Jimmy. | 比吉米强 |
| [13:03] | His parents were rich! | 他是富二代啊 |
| [13:05] | – What do you mean? – Your mom was starting to think | -什么意思 -你老妈开始觉得 |
| [13:07] | that you’re being a failure was our fault. | 你不成器是我们的错 |
| [13:10] | Oh, my God, you’re right. | 天呐 说得对啊 |
| [13:12] | I could’ve been as successful as him. | 我本可以跟他一样成功的 |
| [13:15] | And it’s all your fault. | 都是你们的错 |
| [13:17] | Why didn’t I realize that earlier? | 我怎么没早点意识到呢 |
| [13:19] | Oh, that’s probably your fault, too. | 那可能也是你们的错 |
| [13:21] | No, no. | 不是 不是 |
| [13:22] | It has nothing to do with parenting. | 这跟我们的养育毫无关系 |
| [13:23] | They had money. | 这都是钱的事 |
| [13:24] | Okay, but the Jenkins aren’t rich. | 好吧 但詹金斯家并不富裕 |
| [13:26] | I mean, he’s got a little plumbing business | 他爸就做个水管的小生意 |
| [13:27] | and she’s a school lunch lady. | 而他妈就是个学校食堂打饭阿姨 |
| [13:29] | That’s impossible, Jimmy. | 不可能 吉米 |
| [13:30] | Everyone who goes to that country club is rich. | 去那个乡村俱乐部的全是有钱人 |
| [13:33] | I bet they all own swans. | 我敢打赌那些人家里肯定都养天鹅呢 |
| [13:34] | No, Brad got them their membership. | 不 是布拉德给他们弄到会籍的 |
| [13:37] | And he’s the one who’s rich because his parents gave him | 他才是有钱人 因为他爸妈给了他 |
| [13:39] | confidence, education and self-esteem! | 自信 教育和自尊 |
| [13:41] | Well, we don’t have any of those things, Jimmy, | 吉米 这些东西我们自己都没有 |
| [13:44] | so how are we supposed to give them to you? | 怎么给你呢 |
| [14:04] | Excuse me, sir. Coat check? | 打扰一下 先生 要存放外套吗 |
| [14:11] | Good to go. | 好啦 |
| [14:15] | Hey, Jimbo! | 嘿 吉宝贝 |
| [14:17] | Hey! | 来啦 |
| [14:18] | – Where’s the fiancee? – Oh, uh, sick. | -未婚妻呢 -她病了 |
| [14:20] | Just terrible sore throat. | 嗓子疼得厉害 |
| [14:22] | The doctor says she might even lose her accent. | 医生说可能保不住她的口音了 |
| [14:25] | That’s crazy. | 太扯了 |
| [14:26] | I know. The body– she’s a mystery, huh? | 对啊 人体 她就是这么神秘 对吧 |
| [14:29] | Yeah. | 对啊 |
| [14:30] | Well, how about we get you an application, huh? | 给你填个申请怎么样 |
| [14:33] | Uh, we might have to hold off. | 可能得缓缓 |
| [14:35] | There have been some cutbacks at the laser surgery factory. | 激光手术仪工厂近来一直在裁员 |
| [14:38] | I mean, who knows, a month from now, I could be | 谁知道呢 一个月后 我可能 |
| [14:39] | bagging groceries for a living. | 就要去杂货店搬东西来养家糊口了 |
| [14:41] | We’d still be friends, right? | 那时我们还会是朋友 对吧 |
| [14:43] | Playing hard to get, huh? | 跟我玩欲擒故纵呢 是吧 |
| [14:45] | Well, there’s a reason why “Sheila with the Scarf” | 戴围巾的希拉不再是纳什维尔第一地产商 |
| [14:48] | isn’t the number one home broker in Natesville anymore. | 是有原因的 |
| [14:50] | Because I never give up on a sale. | 因为我绝不放弃任何一个销售机会 |
| [14:53] | Hey, come on, I want you to meet my parents. | 来 我想你见见我的父母 |
| [14:57] | Mom and Dad, I want you to meet my new friend, Jimmy. | 爸妈 这是我的新朋友 吉米 |
| [15:00] | Well, hello, Jimmy. | 你好啊 吉米 |
| [15:01] | We’ve heard a lot about you. | 我们听说过很多你的事呢 |
| [15:03] | And these are the Bergers. | 这是伯杰夫妇 |
| [15:04] | They’re thinking of joining, too. | 他们也在考虑加入呢 |
| [15:06] | Hello, my good man. Ronald Berger. | 老弟你好 我叫罗纳德·伯杰 |
| [15:09] | I own a rock and roll | 我经营一家摇滚乐 |
| [15:09] | equipment manufacturing company. | 设备制造公司 |
| [15:11] | This is my wife, Wendy. | 这是我的妻子 温迪 |
| [15:13] | She’s a nurse. | 她是个护士 |
| [15:14] | And a lawyer. | 也是一名律师 |
| [15:16] | And I’m also a private detective. | 我还兼职私家侦探 |
| [15:18] | Okay, well, you guys get to know each other. | 好了 你们熟悉一下吧 |
| [15:21] | We’ll go put your applications in the office. | 我们把你们的申请送到办公室去 |
| [15:23] | Brad, why don’t you go get us a table. | 布拉德 去给我们找张桌子吧 |
| [15:26] | On it, Mommy. | 这就去 妈咪 |
| [15:30] | What are you guys doing here? | 你们来这干嘛 |
| [15:32] | We had to see these Jenkins for ourselves. | 我们得亲眼看看詹金斯一家 |
| [15:34] | There is no way they raised a kid like Brad without having | 他们能培养出布拉德这样的孩子 |
| [15:37] | some kind of advantages we didn’t. | 肯定是有一些我们没有的优势 |
| [15:38] | Did you ever think that maybe they just weren’t lazy? | 你不觉得或许只是因为他们不懒惰 |
| [15:41] | Oh, please. | 得了吧 |
| [15:42] | All parents are lazy. | 哪有家长不懒惰的 |
| [15:44] | Kids are exhausting. | 熊孩子能磨死人 |
| [15:45] | They’re God’s punishment for having sex. | 孩子是上帝对滚床单的惩罚 |
| [15:47] | They’re cheating somehow. We’re gonna find out how. | 这里边肯定有猫腻 我们会找出来的 |
| [15:49] | You’re gonna blow this for me. | 你俩会毁了一切的 |
| [15:50] | I am bonding with my almost-parents. | 我要和我的亲”爹妈”建立感情 |
| [15:52] | You ripped me out of their lives once, | 你们已经让我离开他们一次 |
| [15:53] | just don’t do it again. | 别再有第二次了 |
| [15:54] | Oh, stop doing that. | 别搞了 |
| [15:56] | It’s so gross! | 好恶心 |
| [15:57] | It’s a nervous habit! I probably picked it up | 习惯性紧张 我很可能是从 |
| [15:58] | ’cause of something you guys did. | 你俩那儿学来的坏习惯 |
| [16:00] | No way. You had that creepy habit since before you were born. | 胡说 你这熊孩子没出生就有这毛病 |
| [16:02] | I got ultrasound pictures of you nibbling on my kidney. | 我还有你啃我肾脏的超声波照片呢 |
| [16:05] | Okay, guys, table’s ready. | 各位 准备用餐吧 |
| [16:07] | Okay, Sabrina warned me about a couple things. | 塞布丽娜提醒了我几件事 |
| [16:09] | Sometimes the water has bubbles. | 有的水里会有气泡 |
| [16:11] | And there are way more forks than you will ever need. | 桌上还会有很多你用不到的叉子 |
| [16:16] | I met Ronald while I was nursing him | 我是在护理他的时候认识罗纳德的 |
| [16:22] | after an accident at the rock and roll manufacturing plant. | 他当时在摇滚器材车间出了点意外 |
| [16:26] | We sued the factory, and now owns it. | 我们控告了工厂 后来工厂就归我们了 |
| [16:30] | And I’m a private detective. | 我还是个私家侦探 |
| [16:33] | Anyway, that’s our boring story. | 不提陈芝麻烂谷子的事了 |
| [16:37] | So, Denise, Bill, you are not wealthy. | 丹妮丝 比尔 你们没什么钱 |
| [16:40] | What advantages did you have in raising your child? | 那在抚养孩子方面有什么优势呢 |
| [16:44] | Excuse me? | 你说什么 |
| [16:45] | I’m sure the gentleman is just wondering | 这位先生可能是想说 |
| [16:47] | how you managed to raise such a successful son. | 你们是怎么教出这么优秀的儿子的 |
| [16:50] | I’m guessing that it was just doing the normal things, | 我猜只是做了些正常的事情吧 |
| [16:53] | like camping outdoors, actual karate lessons, | 像外出露营 实打实的空手道课程 |
| [16:57] | going to the park even if it’s hot. | 即使天热也会去公园什么的 |
| [17:00] | Well, yeah. Of course. | 是的 当然了 |
| [17:02] | But he’s a huge, successful real estate mongrel. | 但他可是位成功的房地产商人啊 |
| [17:06] | You don’t get that from karate lessons. | 这是在空手道课程里学不到的 |
| [17:09] | Jackie Chan couldn’t sell me a house. | 成龙也不一定卖得成房子给我 |
| [17:10] | I can’t understand a word he says. | 谁让我听不懂他说话啊 |
| [17:12] | Actually, I developed a love for real estate | 实际上 我妈妈带我去博物馆看 |
| [17:15] | when my mom took me | 弗兰克·劳埃德·赖特的展览后 |
| [17:16] | to a Frank Lloyd Wright exhibit at the museum. | 我才对房地产感兴趣 |
| [17:18] | You took him to real museums? | 你带他去真正的博物馆了啊 |
| [17:20] | Good for you. | 你真幸运 |
| [17:21] | But weren’t there really long lines at the museum? | 但博物馆不是总排很长的队吗 |
| [17:24] | We’ve heard museums usually have really long lines. | 我们听说博物馆队排得超长的 |
| [17:27] | Well, sometimes. | 偶尔啦 |
| [17:28] | But I always carried little games and puzzles | 但我包里总是带上小游戏和小拼图 |
| [17:32] | in my purse just in case. | 以防万一 |
| [17:33] | Games and puzzles in your purse. | 包里装着小游戏和小拼图啊 |
| [17:35] | I guess you can do that if it’s not stuffed with | 我敢说你们包里一定没香烟和甘草 |
| [17:37] | cigarettes and licorice. | 所以才放得下吧 |
| [17:38] | I shared the licorice with you, | 甘草你也有份吃 |
| [17:39] | but you cried and said it tasted like cigarettes. | 但你哭着说和香烟一个味道 |
| [17:44] | Do you… know each other? | 你们原来认识吗 |
| [17:47] | No. | 不认识 |
| [17:50] | I’m sorry, um, what did you– | 抱歉 你 |
| [17:52] | Did you say something about… | 你刚有说什么 |
| [17:55] | licorice? | 甘草吗 |
| [17:57] | Chad? | 查德 |
| [18:07] | Did he just eat his eyebrow? | 他刚吃的是眉毛吗 |
| [18:12] | Chad? | 查德 |
| [18:13] | Is it you? | 是你吗 |
| [18:14] | It is. It’s me. | 是的 是我 |
| [18:17] | Thank heavens. | 感谢上帝 |
| [18:18] | Our Chad’s come back! | 我们的小查回来了 |
| [18:31] | I’m just so relieved | 真令人欣慰 |
| [18:32] | that you turned out to be a successful businessman | 你成为了成功的商人 |
| [18:35] | who’s going to join our country club. | 还要加入我们的乡村俱乐部 |
| [18:37] | Me, too. | 是啊 |
| [18:38] | I did not think those two idiot teenagers | 我也没想到当年那对二货未成年 |
| [18:41] | had what it took to raise a successful kid. | 能把你教得这么好 |
| [18:43] | They didn’t. | 他们才没有 |
| [18:44] | They did a horrible job. | 他们教得烂透了 |
| [18:46] | I barely got my GED, | 我差点没拿到高中文凭 |
| [18:48] | I knocked up a serial killer, | 后来还搞大了连环杀手的肚子 |
| [18:50] | and now I’m a single dad working as a bagger at a grocery store. | 现在是一名在杂货店卸货的单亲爸爸 |
| [18:54] | Plus, I still say “Pasghetti,” | 到现在还只能说”大意利面” |
| [18:55] | and I don’t know why or how to fix it. | 死都改不过来 |
| [18:57] | It’s true. | 说得对 |
| [18:58] | We’re the worst parents ever. | 我们是最糟糕的父母 |
| [19:00] | I knew this day would come. | 我就知道这天会到来 |
| [19:01] | We’ve run out of excuses. | 我们没有借口了 |
| [19:03] | No kidding. | 的确 |
| [19:04] | When we get home, there’s some | 等我回家 我要摒弃 |
| [19:05] | “World’s Greatest” mugs I’m gonna need to get rid of. | 过去那个世上最蠢的我 |
| [19:08] | Wait, you’re the idiot teenagers? | 等等 你们就是那对二货未成年吗 |
| [19:10] | Sorry, Jimmy. | 对不起 吉米 |
| [19:12] | We feel horrible. | 我们很内疚 |
| [19:13] | You are who you are because of us. | 子不教 父之过 |
| [19:16] | If we hadn’t been so selfish and stolen you back, | 如果我俩不自私地把你偷回来 |
| [19:18] | you might have ended up like Brad. | 你也许就跟布拉德一样了 |
| [19:20] | I hope this doesn’t affect our chances for membership. | 我希望这事不会影响我们的会员身份 |
| [19:22] | I’ve never tasted meat like this. | 我从未吃过如此美味的肉 |
| [19:24] | I can’t believe you people. | 你们真让人难以置信 |
| [19:26] | You are the worst, laziest parents ever. | 你们是世上最差最蠢的父母 |
| [19:30] | And you’re no better– with an illegitimate child | 你也没好到哪里去 带着一个私生子苟活 |
| [19:33] | from a serial killer? | 竟然还是连环杀手的孩子 |
| [19:35] | And all of you lie about your identities. | 刚才还都谎报身份 |
| [19:38] | You’re as bad as the Mexicans! | 你们和墨西哥人一样糟透了 |
| [19:42] | Excuse me. | 你说什么 |
| [19:43] | I happen to work with quite a few Mexicans. | 我有好几个墨西哥同事呢 |
| [19:46] | Oh, there’s a shocker. | 真令人意外啊 |
| [19:47] | Judging by your grammar, | 从你的措辞上判断 |
| [19:49] | I’m guessing you’re chummy with the blacks, as well. | 我想你跟黑人也关系亲密吧 |
| [19:55] | I can’t believe I let you sit on my shoulders. | 真不敢相信我让你坐到我肩膀上 |
| [20:05] | Oh, my God. | 太极品了 |
| [20:07] | If you hadn’t taken me back, | 幸亏你们把我接回来了 |
| [20:09] | I would’ve ended up just like them. | 不然我就会变得和他们一样了 |
| [20:12] | Thank you. | 谢谢你们 |
| [20:14] | Let’s go home. | 咱回家吧 |
| [20:15] | You know, before we go, | 在走之前 |
| [20:17] | I have been dying to try Bill’s fancy macaroni. | 我很想尝尝比尔的花样通心面 |
| [20:20] | Excuse me, sir. | 很抱歉 先生 |
| [20:21] | I cannot let you eat Mr. Jenkins’ pasta | 我不能让你吃詹金斯先生的 |
| [20:24] | in special Alfredo sauce. | 加了秘制阿尔弗雷德蘸酱的意大利面 |
| [20:26] | Why not? | 为什么不行 |
| [20:27] | Because I am Alfredo. | 因为我就是阿尔弗雷德 |
| [20:32] | I’m not gonna lie, we were pretty lucky | 说真的 我们很幸运地发现 |
| [20:34] | those folks turned out to be massive racists. | 那些家伙居然是种族歧视者 |
| [20:37] | Because it made me realize that | 这让我觉得 |
| [20:38] | even though my parents were kind of lazy, | 尽管我父母有点懒惰 |
| [20:40] | I was better off having been raised by good people. | 但我还是宁愿跟着善良的人长大 |
| [20:46] | It also made us realize that | 这也让我意识到 |
| [20:48] | we had to work on not being so lazy with Hope. | 我们对喜旺不能懒惰 |
| [20:50] | Like going camping outdoors, | 比如外出露营 |
| [20:52] | so we could roast marshmallows over a campfire | 这样就可以在篝火上烤棉花糖 |
| [20:54] | instead of pressing them up against the radiator. | 而不是用暖气片凑合 |
| [20:56] | Even if we only made it to the backyard, it was a start. | 就算只是在我家后院 也是个好开端 |
| [21:00] | Or finding a clever way to survive a 15-minute wait at an actual museum. | 也找到了消磨在博物馆排队时间的好方法 |
| [21:06] | Or going to an actual park, | 而且不管多热 |
| [21:08] | no matter how hot it was outside. | 都要去真正的公园 |
| [21:11] | Wow, she is really into that rock. | 她对那石头真是情有独钟 |
| [21:13] | Maybe she’s gonna be a geologist. | 她将来有可能成为地质学家 |
| [21:18] | Oh, or extreme meat eater. | 或者极端肉食者 |
| [21:20] | That’s the thing, right? | 这也是条出路 对吧 |
| [21:22] | A few people say it. | 也不是不行啦 |