| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:01] | – Hey, Ma. – Hello, dear. | – 嘿，妈 – 哈喽，亲爱的 |
| [00:03] | Whatcha doin’ there? | 你干吗呢？ |
| [00:05] | Oh, this? | 哦，这个？ |
| [00:07] | This is called “polishing silver.” | 这个叫做 “擦亮银器” |
| [00:12] | Yeah, I know that. | 是，这我知道 |
| [00:14] | It’s just that we don’t often see your silver. | 只是我们不太见到你的银器 |
| [00:16] | Please, stop hinting, Debra. | 行了，别暗示了，黛比拉 |
| [00:18] | The silver’s going to Robbie. | 这些银器是留给罗比的 |
| [00:20] | It’s already in the will. | 已经写在遗嘱里了 |
| [00:24] | Is this for Lee and Stan’s anniversary party? | 这是给李和史丹 的结婚纪念日的吗？ |
| [00:26] | Their forty-fifth. | 他们的45周年 |
| [00:27] | They’re our dearest friends, but I have to tell you, | 他们是我们最亲爱的朋友。 不过我得跟你说， |
| [00:30] | I never thought they’d last this long. | 我从没想他们能这么持久 |
| [00:34] | Where you goin’, Robert? | 你去哪，罗伯特？ |
| [00:35] | What’s goin’ on in there? | 里头怎么了？ |
| [00:37] | Robbie is helping your father | 罗比在帮你爸 |
| [00:38] | write a funny speech for Lee and Stan. | 为李和史丹写逗笑的讲话 |
| [00:40] | Get back here! We’re not done! | 快回来！ 咱们还没写完呢！ |
| [00:42] | Oh, we’re done, old man! | 哦，咱们完了，老头！ |
| [00:44] | Fine, fine! | 好吧，好吧！ |
| [00:46] | I don’t need your help anymore! | 我不需要你帮忙了！ |
| [00:49] | Marie, I’m not doing the stupid speech. | 玛丽，我不讲这个愚蠢的话了 |
| [00:52] | It’s the one thing you have to do for the party! | 这是你在派对上唯一能做的事了！ |
| [00:55] | Well, now the one thing I have to do is eat shrimp. | 唔，现在我唯一能做的 就是吃虾了 |
| [00:58] | You have to write something. | 你必须写点东西 |
| [01:00] | They’re our dearest friends. | 他们是咱们最亲爱的朋友 |
| [01:02] | To hell with them. | 让他们见鬼去吧 |
| [01:03] | You’re impossible! | 你真不可理喻！ |
| [01:05] | Would you talk to him? | 你能跟他说说吗？ |
| [01:07] | He has to write something, otherwise… | 他必须得写点东西， 不然…… |
| [01:14] | Raymond… | 雷蒙德…… |
| [01:15] | Ma, don’t even think of it. | 妈，想都别想 |
| [01:17] | Raymond… | 雷蒙德…… |
| [01:18] | Back! Back! Back! | 退后！退后！退后！ |
| [01:22] | Read the will. | 读一读遗嘱 |
| [01:28] | You can do it, Raymond. | 你能行的，雷蒙德 |
| [01:30] | You can do Lee and Stan’s tribute! | 你能给李和史丹献辞！ |
| [01:32] | No, I can’t! | 不，我不能！ |
| [01:35] | They’ll be so thrilled! | 他们会受宠若惊的！ |
| [01:37] | Ma, please, I hardly know ’em. | 妈，求你了， 我对他们都没什么了解 |
| [01:39] | Raymond, they’re our dearest friends. | 雷蒙德，他们是我们最亲爱的朋友 |
| [01:42] | No! No! No! | 不！不！不！ |
| [01:44] | We’re practically related. You lived at their house! | 咱们事实上可以算亲戚了。 你在他们家住过！ |
| [01:46] | What? | 什么？ |
| [01:47] | When your father and I went to Atlantic City. | 我和你爸去大西洋城的时候 |
| [01:50] | – That was a weekend. – It was a long weekend. | – 那只是个周末 – 很长的周末 |
| [01:52] | You said it. | 你说出来了 |
| [01:55] | Raymond, you’ll be wonderful. | 雷蒙德，你会干得很好的 |
| [01:57] | Ma, I spend all day trying to write my column. | 妈，我一整天都在费力 写我的专栏 |
| [01:59] | I don’t have time to come up with an anniversary speech. | 我没时间想什么 结婚纪念日讲话 |
| [02:02] | It’s not a speech. | 不是讲话 |
| [02:03] | It was a speech when your father was doing it, | 你爸做的话是讲话， |
| [02:05] | ’cause that’s all he could handle. | 因为这是他的极限了 |
| [02:06] | But you… you can do anything! | 可是你…… 万事皆有可能！ |
| [02:09] | Not anything. In fact, nothing. | 不是万事。实际上是，没什么事 |
| [02:13] | Maybe you could do like an interpretive dance | 也许你可以来个 |
| [02:15] | or something. | 形意舞之类的 |
| [02:17] | You could do a thing where you shut it! | 你能闭上的话就算表演了！ |
| [02:22] | Whatever you do, try to mention my name is Debra. | 不管你做什么， 想着提提我叫黛比拉 |
| [02:24] | Lee keeps calling me Donna. | 李老是叫我当娜 |
| [02:25] | Are you helping me? | 你这是帮我吗？ |
| [02:28] | This has to be special, | 一定要特别， |
| [02:30] | ’cause it’s the evening’s entertainment. | 因为这是晚间的娱乐 |
| [02:32] | So I want you to feel free to get creative. | 所以我要你自由的变得有创造力 |
| [02:35] | I’d like to feel free to not do this! | 我想自由的不用做这件事！ |
| [02:37] | I’m not good at this stuff! | 我不擅长这种东西！ |
| [02:39] | Oh… | 哦…… |
| [02:40] | You’re a witty and charming boy. | 你是个聪明、可爱的孩子 |
| [02:44] | Why don’t you do a funny poem? | 你为什么不写首逗乐的诗呢？ |
| [02:46] | A poem… no! No way, no! | 诗……不！不可能的，不！ |
| [02:49] | You don’t want to disappoint everyone, Raymond. | 你不想让所有人失望的，雷蒙德 |
| [02:52] | Yeah! You can’t help out? | 是的！你帮不了忙？ |
| [03:03] | Your mother thinks I am a moron. | 你妈当我是白痴 |
| [03:06] | I agree to help her | 我同意帮她 |
| [03:08] | and heat up some things for the party tomorrow. | 为明天的派对 热点东西 |
| [03:10] | Listen to her directions for me… | 听听她给我写的说明…… |
| [03:12] | “Debra, these are mini quiches,” | “黛比拉，这些是迷你起西” |
| [03:15] | then in parentheses, “French cheese pies.” | 然后圆括号里， “法国奶酪派” |
| [03:19] | “Put in the oven tomorrow at 6:00 P.M.” | “明日下午6点放入炉内” |
| [03:22] | “P.M.” is underlined! | “下午”加了下划线！ |
| [03:24] | So what? It’s not that bad. | 那又怎么样？ 也没多坏 |
| [03:26] | Oh, no? Listen to this… “Caution… oven gets hot.” | 哦，没有吗？听这个…… “小心……炉子会热起来” |
| [03:34] | – Hey, Deb. – Hey, Robert. | – 嘿，黛比 – 嘿，罗伯特 |
| [03:35] | What’s up, Shakespeare? | 有什么事，莎士比亚？ |
| [03:38] | Shut up! | 闭嘴！ |
| [03:39] | How goeth it? | 怎么样了？ |
| [03:42] | I don’t know. Here, look at this. | 我不知道。给，看看这个 |
| [03:46] | “It’s no wonder Stan was attracted to Lee. | “难怪史丹会迷上李 |
| [03:48] | He’s an accountant, so he appreciates good figures.” | 他是个会计， 所以他最欣赏好身材（数字）了” |
| [03:54] | What are you saying? | 你说什么呢？ |
| [03:56] | That Lee has a good figure? | 李的身材好？ |
| [03:59] | Have you seen Lee? | 你见过李吗？ |
| [04:02] | Stop it! I know, all right? | 闭嘴！ 我知道，好吗？ |
| [04:04] | It’s not funny. These people are not funny. | 这没意思。 这些人都没趣 |
| [04:06] | They play cards and walk around the mall for exercise. | 他们打牌，在商场里乱逛当锻炼 |
| [04:10] | They’re boring people. | 他们是闷蛋 |
| [04:12] | It’s too bad it’s not Ma and Dad’s anniversary, | 真可惜不是爸妈的纪念日 |
| [04:14] | then you’d have material! | 不然你就有料了！ |
| [04:16] | You know what I was thinkin’ of the other day? | 你知道我那天想什么了吗？ |
| [04:19] | Remember the time Mom sewed his fly shut? | 还记得妈把他的 裤子拉链上面缝上吗？ |
| [04:24] | What? When was this? | 什么？什么时候？ |
| [04:26] | We were in high school and she was sick of him | 我们上高中的时候。 她恶心死他了 |
| [04:27] | sittin’ on the couch all open and unzipped. | 门户大开着坐在沙发上 |
| [04:31] | It didn’t work, though. | 不过没起作用 |
| [04:33] | He’d just come home, rip off his pants, | 他回到家，把裤子脱了， |
| [04:34] | and hang ’em on the front door knob. | 然后挂在前门把手上 |
| [04:38] | And then he’d come in the house. | 然后他进了屋子 |
| [04:42] | Hey, you know what? | 嘿，知道吗？ |
| [04:43] | That’s what you should do, stuff about your parents. | 你该写写这个，你父母的事 |
| [04:46] | It’s Lee and Stan’s thing. | 那是李和史丹的日子 |
| [04:48] | I know, but you could do like a marriage comparison. | 我知道，可你可以做个， 好像，婚姻比较 |
| [04:51] | You know, where Lee and Stan | 你知道，李和史丹的 |
| [04:53] | are a classic, successful marriage, | 是经典、成功的婚姻， |
| [04:55] | and your parents are… less classical. | 而你父母的…… 不是那么经典 |
| [04:59] | That’s true. | 这是真的 |
| [05:01] | I would love to be able to bring up the time | 我很高兴能说说 |
| [05:03] | they drove a car through the living room wall. | 他们开车穿过客厅那次 |
| [05:06] | Yeah, as opposed to Lee and Stan, | 是的，李和史丹则相反， |
| [05:07] | who prefer to ring the doorbell. | 他们倾向于按门铃 |
| [05:12] | – That’s good. – Yeah. | – 真不错 – 是啊 |
| [05:14] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [05:16] | Or… or how ’bout the time | 或者…… 或者那次 |
| [05:18] | my father accidentally gave out condoms for Halloween? | 我爸意外发起了万圣节套子？ |
| [05:24] | How ’bout the time that they fought for a week | 还有一次他们斗了一个星期， |
| [05:27] | because they were literally comparing apples and oranges! | 因为他们比较起了苹果和桔子！ |
| [05:31] | Right… right! | 没错……没错！ |
| [05:33] | I remember that. I had to vote! | 我记得。 我还投了票！ |
| [05:35] | Yeah, l… it’s good. | 是啊，我……这个不错 |
| [05:37] | Hey, this is pretty good stuff. | 嘿，这些是好东西 |
| [05:39] | Maybe we should do it. | 也许咱们改做这个 |
| [05:40] | You and me, we could do like a skit. | 你和我，咱么可以演的像小品 |
| [05:42] | Sure, I’ll do it with you. | 当然，我会和你一起做的 |
| [05:43] | W-w-wait a minute. Wait a minute. | 等―― 等一等。 |
| [05:45] | You cannot do that. | 你们不能这么做 |
| [05:47] | Yeah, sure we can. | 我们能，我们当然呢了 |
| [05:48] | You can be Lee and my mom, | 你可以演李和我妈， |
| [05:51] | and I’ll be Stan and my dad. | 我就演史丹和爸 |
| [05:52] | – That would be hilarious. – Yeah. | – 肯定搞笑死了 – 是的 |
| [05:54] | What else we got on ’em, like the pants thing? | 咱们还知道他们什么事， 像裤子之类的？ |
| [05:56] | Oh, no, no, no… | 哦，不，不，不…… |
| [05:57] | when I said that, I wasn’t serious. Count me out. | 我刚才说的时候，我不是认真的。 别把我扯进去 |
| [05:59] | All right, you’re out. So how should we do it? | 好吧，没你的事。 那咱们怎么做？ |
| [06:03] | Now… now, look. | 现在……好了，看 |
| [06:06] | Really… let me tell you something, Ray, | 说真的……我告诉你，雷蒙德 |
| [06:08] | this stuff is not funny. | 这种事不好笑 |
| [06:11] | What? You were just laughin’. | 什么？你刚刚还笑了 |
| [06:12] | Yeah, but that was behind their backs… | 是的，可那是在他们背后…… |
| [06:15] | this would be in front of their faces | 这个是当着他们的面， |
| [06:17] | with all their friends watching. | 还有他们所有朋友看着 |
| [06:19] | Yeah, see, that’s right, their friends, | 是的，看，说得没错，他们的朋友 |
| [06:21] | so everybody would know we were just kiddin’ around. | 所以大家都会知道 我们只是瞎胡闹 |
| [06:24] | No. I’m telling you, you shouldn’t do this. | 不。我告诉你们， 你们不能这么做 |
| [06:26] | It would just humiliate them, | 这只会羞辱他们， |
| [06:27] | and your children will be watching! | 而你们的孩子会看着！ |
| [06:30] | The kids are gonna be at a sleep-over, | 孩子们回去别的地方睡 |
| [06:32] | and Mom and Dad are unhumiliatable. | 而爸妈是羞辱不了的 |
| [06:36] | I’m telling ya, this is very risky. | 我可告诉你们， 这是非常冒险的 |
| [06:39] | No… it’s funny. | 不……这很有趣 |
| [06:41] | I think it’s funny. Isn’t it funny? | 我觉得有趣。 不有趣吗？ |
| [06:42] | I thought it was funny. | 我觉得很有趣 |
| [06:45] | Ah, maybe we shouldn’t do it. | 啊，也许我们不该这么做 |
| [06:47] | You know what I always like? A good song parody. | 你知道我一向喜欢什么吗？ 好听的打油歌 |
| [06:50] | A song parody? Like what? | 打油歌？ 什么样的？ |
| [06:52] | How ’bout something like, | 就比如说， |
| [06:55] | Lee and Stan have been married 45 years | 李和史丹结婚45年 |
| [06:59] | Lee and Stan have been married 45 years | 李和史丹结婚45年 |
| [07:03] | Oh, they like to play canasta | 哦，他们爱打卡纳斯塔牌 |
| [07:05] | and take walks around the malls | 爱在商场绕圈 |
| [07:07] | and why not? It’s marvelous exercise. | 为什么不？ 这是多好的锻炼 |
| [07:19] | I think the skit is funny. | 我想小品很有趣 |
| [07:21] | We’ll do the skit. | 咱们演小品 |
| [07:22] | – Okay, so I’ll be your mom. – You come in first… | – 好了，那我做你妈 – 你先进来…… |
| [07:28] | Okay, wait, wait… | 好了，等等，等等…… |
| [07:30] | and finally… | 最后…… |
| [07:32] | this is how Lee and Stan might visit someone’s home. | 这是李和史丹 拜访别人家的样子 |
| [07:36] | Ding-dong! | 叮咚！ |
| [07:37] | Hello! Thank you for inviting us. | 哈喽！谢谢邀请我们 |
| [07:39] | Oh, Stan, isn’t this a lovely house? | 哦，史丹，多可爱的房子呀，是不是？ |
| [07:42] | It certainly is, and you are lovely too, Lee. | 当然了，你也可爱，李 |
| [07:44] | Oh, thank you, Stan. I love you. | 哦，谢谢你，史丹。 我爱你 |
| [07:47] | And I love you, Lee. | 我也爱你，李 |
| [07:51] | Now… | 现在…… |
| [07:53] | let’s take a look at how Frank and Marie | 咱们来看看 弗兰克和玛丽 |
| [07:55] | might visit someone’s home, shall we? | 怎么登门拜访的，怎么样？ |
| [08:00] | Do you think Raymond is home? | 你猜雷蒙德在不在？ |
| [08:02] | Let’s find out. | 试试看 |
| [08:03] | Ba-boom! | 巴��！ |
| [08:08] | Hello, dears. | 哈喽，亲爱的 |
| [08:11] | Make me somethin’ to eat! | 给我弄点吃的！ |
| [08:12] | Don’t mind me, I’ll just be going through your mail. | 不用管我，我只会 看看你们的信 |
| [08:16] | And I’ll just be watching your television. | 我只会看看你们的电视 |
| [08:31] | Oh, Frank, zip up your pants! | 哦，弗兰克，拉上你的裤子！ |
| [08:34] | Zip up your mouth! | 闭上你的嘴！ |
| [08:37] | Oh my God, look what they leave lying around! | 哦，我的天，看看他们把什么到处乱扔！ |
| [08:40] | The “Sports Illustrated” Swimsuit Issue! | 《体育画报》泳装特辑！ |
| [08:43] | Holy crap! Gimme that! | 我靠！快给我！ |
| [08:47] | Frank, you know that’s not what real women look like. | 弗兰克，你知道那不是 真正的女人的样子 |
| [08:49] | No kidding. | 别开玩笑了 |
| [08:52] | And just what magazine are you in, Frank? | 你上了什么杂志，弗兰克？ |
| [08:54] | “Bald and Gassy?” | 《秃头又多屁》？ |
| [08:58] | Hey, my problem is, | 嘿，我的问题是 |
| [08:59] | I got a lifetime subscription to you! | 我替你订了一辈子的！ |
| [09:02] | And I can cancel it at any time! | 我随时都可以退掉！ |
| [09:05] | Make me somethin’ to eat! | 给我做吃的！ |
| [09:06] | Make it yourself! | 你自己做去！ |
| [09:08] | If I could make it myself, you’d be out on the curb! | 我要是能自己做， 你早睡马路牙子了！ |
| [09:12] | You’d love that, wouldn’t you? | 这样你就喜欢了，是不是？ |
| [09:14] | I think we’d both love it. | 我想咱们都会喜欢 |
| [09:15] | And you know what else we both love? | 你知道还有什么咱们都喜欢？ |
| [09:17] | – Lee and Stan! | – Lee and Stan! – 李和史丹！ – 李和史丹！ |
| [09:19] | – Happy Anniversary! | – Happy Anniversary! – 纪念日快乐！ – 纪念日快乐！ |
| [09:25] | Thank you so much! | 太感谢了！ |
| [09:27] | I was crying, laughing. | 我都笑出眼泪了 |
| [09:29] | Have you ever seen anything like that? | 你以前看过这种的吗？ |
| [09:31] | It’s better than Broadway! | 比百老汇都好！ |
| [09:33] | I didn’t like it! Too much Lee and Stan! | 我不喜欢！ 太多李和史丹了！ |
| [09:37] | That was wonderful! | 太好了！ |
| [09:39] | I liked when you called him “Bald and Gassy.” | 我喜欢你们叫他“秃头又多屁” |
| [09:43] | I knew him when he was just gassy. | 我认识他的时候 他还只是多屁 |
| [09:47] | Look who’s talking! | 看看谁说话了！ |
| [09:49] | I said to Frank, “that’s you to a ‘T ‘!” | 我对弗兰克说： “把你揭露的体无完肤！” |
| [09:52] | You had this one down perfectly. I was petrified! | 这你可没说错。 我是吓坏了！ |
| [09:55] | Well, we’re glad you could enjoy it. | 唔，我们很高兴你们喜欢 |
| [09:58] | Better than Broadway! | 比百老汇还精彩！ |
| [10:01] | – Thank you. – Yeah, thanks. | – 谢谢 – 是，谢谢 |
| [10:03] | All right. | 好了 |
| [10:05] | All right, now we can enjoy ourselves. | 好了，现在我们能自己乐了 |
| [10:07] | Well, Raymond, it’s official… | 唔，雷蒙德， 毋庸置疑…… |
| [10:09] | They love you no matter what you do. | 不管你做什么他们都爱你 |
| [10:12] | No matter what I do? | 不管我做什么？ |
| [10:14] | You mean like provide crowd-pleasing entertainment? | 你是说，比如， 让大票人了翻天？ |
| [10:18] | It just should be noted that everybody was drunk. | 不应该忽视大家都醉了 |
| [10:22] | Drunk with laughter. | 笑的醉了 |
| [10:24] | Oh, my-my, you know, I expect that from Raymond, | 哦，天哪天哪，你知道， 我早就料到雷蒙德会这样 |
| [10:28] | but not from you, Debra. | 可不是你，黛比拉 |
| [10:29] | I’m very disappointed. | 我非常失望 |
| [10:31] | No one’s going to listen to Robert anymore | 没人会再听罗伯特的了 |
| [10:34] | No one’s going to listen to Robert anymore | 没人会再听罗伯特的了 |
| [10:37] | All right… | 好了…… |
| [10:38] | You were wrong and we were funny | 你是错的，我们有趣 |
| [10:40] | And you can’t stand it, honey | 你受不了了，亲爱的 |
| [10:43] | Did I mention that you’re due back at the zoo? | 我又没有说过你该回动物园了？ |
| [10:57] | Good bye, Max. | 再见，麦克斯 |
| [10:59] | Thank you, dear. Very nice. | 谢谢，亲爱的。非常好 |
| [11:02] | Thanks for coming, Garvin. | 谢谢你来，加文 |
| [11:04] | Great party! First-class entertainment. | 了不起的派对！ 一流的节目 |
| [11:07] | Hey, Ray, Debra… | 嘿，雷，黛比拉…… |
| [11:10] | Thank you, Garvin, thank you. | 谢谢，加文，谢谢 |
| [11:12] | Robert, I want to see you in there next time. | 罗伯特，下回我想见到你出演 |
| [11:15] | You could be like a… a big Indian! | 你可以做，比如…… 印第安大个子！ |
| [11:19] | Or a… a big, funny, galumphy waiter. | 或者……大个、滑稽、笨手笨脚的服务生 |
| [11:26] | – Bye! – Bye. | – 再见！ – 再见 |
| [11:32] | Never liked that guy. | 从来没喜欢过那家伙 |
| [11:36] | Marie, this was terrific. | 玛丽，太精彩了 |
| [11:38] | Absolutely. Garvin was right. | 绝对的。加文说得对 |
| [11:40] | Your show was top-notch. | 你们的表演是最一流的 |
| [11:43] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [11:44] | Just remember who got Raymond to do it. | 别忘了谁让雷蒙德做的 |
| [11:47] | I couldn’t have done it without Debra. | 没有黛比拉我做不了 |
| [11:49] | We had great inspiration. | 我们有伟大的灵感源泉 |
| [11:51] | She’s right… without us, no show! | 她说得对…… 没我们，没表演！ |
| [11:55] | You two were so good. | 你们俩太厉害了 |
| [11:57] | You and Frank better get ready, | 你和弗兰克最好|准备好 |
| [11:59] | because you might have to do something like that | 因为你们说不定在 他们纪念日上 |
| [12:01] | for their anniversary. | 也要做做这个 |
| [12:02] | Oh, that I’d love to see. | 哦，那个我可想看 |
| [12:05] | We wouldn’t know what to do. | 我们不知道怎么做 |
| [12:06] | Are you kiddin’? lt’d be a piece of cake! | 你开玩笑吗？ 小菜一碟！ |
| [12:09] | – Oh, yeah? – Give us a little, Frank. | – 哦，是吗？ – 给我们来一段，弗兰克 |
| [12:11] | No, no, you two just do us some more. | 不，不，你们俩给我们再来点 |
| [12:14] | No, no. Go ahead. | 不，不。来吧 |
| [12:15] | “No, no. Go ahead.” | “不，不。来吧” |
| [12:18] | That’s him! With the nasal voice. | 就是他！ 那个鼻音 |
| [12:21] | Yeah, nasal voice, all right. | 是啊，鼻音，好吧 |
| [12:23] | Oh, I hurt my pinky | 哦，我打字的时候 |
| [12:25] | when I was typing! | 弄伤了小指头！ |
| [12:28] | The keys were so hard! | 键盘太硬了！ |
| [12:31] | I can’t do this anymore! | 我做不了这个了！ |
| [12:36] | Oh, stop, Ray. | 哦，行了，雷 |
| [12:38] | I’m trying to heat up soup from a can… | 我正费劲热罐里的汤呢…… |
| [12:46] | …and it’s very tricky. | ……好复杂的 |
| [12:53] | That’s you, Donna! | 那是你，当娜！ |
| [12:55] | It’s “Debra.” | 是“黛比拉” |
| [12:59] | Who cares! Pay more attention to me! | 谁管呢！ 多关心关心我！ |
| [13:03] | I’m a needy, whiney baby! | 我是个可怜、爱哭鼻子的宝宝！ |
| [13:06] | My pinky! | 我的小指头！ |
| [13:10] | Stop! Stop! | 行了！行了！ |
| [13:20] | Ray, you never help me with anything around here. | 雷，你从不帮我的忙 |
| [13:24] | Idiot! | 白痴！ |
| [13:27] | You’re so mean to me! | 你对我太坏了！ |
| [13:29] | I want my mommy! | 我要我妈咪！ |
| [13:40] | Then go over there, because I’m too busy | 那就去吧，因为我太忙了， |
| [13:43] | to be nice to you. | 没时间对你好 |
| [13:47] | That’s perfect, | 太完美了， |
| [13:49] | ’cause she’s so mean to him, always! | 因为她对他总是那么坏！ |
| [13:52] | And he’s such a baby! | 而他是那么的孩子气！ |
| [13:54] | – I am not! – See! | – 我没有！ – 看！ |
| [13:59] | Stop! My stomach! You’re killing me! | 停下！我的肚子！ 你们要害死我了！ |
| [14:04] | More! | 再来！ |
| [14:06] | Yeah, you know what, | 是啊，知道吗， |
| [14:08] | it’s gettin’ kinda late. | 现在有点晚了 |
| [14:10] | Yeah, it is, it really is. | 是啊，是的，的确是的 |
| [14:12] | Hey, Dad, do how he has no ass! | 嘿，爸，演那个他没屁股的！ |
| [14:24] | I’m sorry, but that is messed up! | 很遗憾，可那真是一团糟！ |
| [14:27] | I mean, that is just not funny! | 我是说，那一点都没趣！ |
| [14:29] | Why would they do that? | 他们为什么那么做？ |
| [14:31] | Why? Because they have no class. No class! | 为什么？因为他们没品。 没品！ |
| [14:34] | Raymond, you left without saying good-bye | 雷蒙德，你没跟李和史丹说再见 |
| [14:37] | to Lee and Stan… that was rude. | 就走了…… 这可不礼貌 |
| [14:39] | Yeah, where are your manners? | 是啊，你的礼节哪去了？ |
| [14:41] | Me, manners? You, manners! | 我，礼节？ 你们，礼节！ |
| [14:43] | You were right. They have no sense of humor. | 你是对的。他们没有幽默感 |
| [14:45] | I think they’re the feel-good hit of the season! | 我认为他们是 本季最有感觉的人了！ |
| [14:47] | What are you talking about, Raymond? | 你说什么呢，雷蒙德？ |
| [14:50] | Come on, you didn’t like our skit, | 得了吧，你们不喜欢我们的小品 |
| [14:51] | so you went out of your way to embarrass us. | 所以你们就 想办法让我们难堪 |
| [14:53] | We loved your skit. Didn’t we, Frank? | 我们很喜欢你们的小品。 不是吗，弗兰克？ |
| [14:55] | Yeah, for those five minutes, | 是啊，那5分钟里 |
| [14:57] | I didn’t mind everybody drinkin’ my booze. | 我都不在乎所有人来喝我的酒 |
| [15:00] | Let’s just be honest, all right? | 咱们都坦率点吧，好吗？ |
| [15:02] | We’re sorry we made fun of you, | 我们很抱歉 开你们的玩笑 |
| [15:03] | we’re sorry we hurt your feelings. | 我们抱歉伤害了你们的感情 |
| [15:05] | Hurt our feelings? We were laughing… | 伤害我们的感情？ 我们在笑…… |
| [15:07] | everybody was laughing. | 所有人都在笑 |
| [15:09] | Then why’d you lash out at us? | 那你们为什么 对我们人身攻击？ |
| [15:11] | What the hell are you talkin’ about? | 你说的什么呢？ |
| [15:14] | We were bein’ funny, just like you. | 我们在搞笑呢，就像你们一样 |
| [15:16] | Bein’ funny, just like us… | 搞笑，就像我们…… |
| [15:18] | let me explain something about humor to you people. | 让我来跟你们这帮人解释 什么叫幽默 |
| [15:30] | Yeah, see? Right there. | 是的，看到了？那边 |
| [15:31] | That’s a perfect example of something that’s not funny! | 这就是没趣的最好例子！ |
| [15:34] | And also ugly! | 并且丑陋！ |
| [15:41] | I think that you need to learn | 我想你们需要知道 |
| [15:43] | that usually what makes something funny is its tone, | 让事情有趣的是 说话时的语调 |
| [15:46] | a light, comic feeling. | 轻松、幽默的感觉 |
| [15:49] | That’s why people were laughing during our skit… | 这就是别人听我们小品时 笑的原因…… |
| [15:51] | we had the spirit of fun about us. | 我们有那种打趣的精神 |
| [15:54] | Therefore, the audience was free | 因此，观众可以自由的 |
| [15:55] | to feel comfortable and amused. | 感觉到舒服和有趣 |
| [15:57] | Will this lecture be available on audio cassette? | 这个讲演有没有录音带卖？ |
| [16:04] | I’m tellin’ you, Ray, | 我告诉你，雷 |
| [16:05] | I heard people laughin’ at our stuff, too. | 我听到别人 听我们的东西也笑了 |
| [16:07] | Okay, fine, if you want that kind of laugh… | 好吧，你们要是想要那种笑…… |
| [16:09] | those were cheap laughs. | 那些便宜的笑 |
| [16:10] | – They were? – Of course, they were! | – 是吗？ – 当然是了！ |
| [16:12] | Oh, Granny said “idiot”… | 哦，奶奶说“白痴”…… |
| [16:14] | what’s clever about that? | 这有什么聪明的？ |
| [16:15] | Yeah, and when did I ever do this? | 是啊，并且我什么时候这样子了？ |
| [16:21] | All right, so let me get this straight… | 好吧，看看我有没有理解对…… |
| [16:23] | it’s okay to poke fun at Mom and Dad, | 你们拿爸妈当笑话就没事， |
| [16:26] | but you guys are strictly off-limits? | 但你们俩就不能让人笑了？ |
| [16:28] | No, no… | 不，不是…… |
| [16:30] | No. | 不 |
| [16:33] | I mean, come on, Robert! | 我说，得了吧，罗伯特！ |
| [16:34] | There is a huge difference here! | 这可有天壤之别！ |
| [16:36] | We had to think up what we were gonna say. | 我们得使劲想说什么 |
| [16:38] | They were so ready with their attack! | 他们进攻起来连计划都不用！ |
| [16:40] | Yeah, it’s like you practice it in your basement. | 是啊，好像你们在 地下室里练习过了 |
| [16:44] | You know, I think what we’re seeing here | 知道吗，我想咱们看到的是 |
| [16:46] | is that humor, while so often a tonic, | 是那种幽默， 尽管多数时候让人开心， |
| [16:49] | can be a poison to those unprepared to take it. | 对没准备的人 也可能是毒药 |
| [16:57] | Yeah, great. | 是吗，好极了 |
| [16:59] | Why don’t you ba-doo-dee-do outta here? | 你为什么不 吧嘟嘀嘟的出去呢？ |
| [17:03] | Okay… | 好吧…… |
| [17:05] | well, see, a line like that | 唔，看，类似的台词 |
| [17:08] | just rolls off my back, | 我刚刚也想出来一句 |
| [17:09] | whereas if I call you a name like “Nosey Nosenstein”… | 而要是我叫你，比方说，“鼻音鼻音斯坦”…… |
| [17:16] | you get your big honker all out of whack! | 你的喇叭就马上坏掉了！ |
| [17:21] | Beep! Beep! | 哔！哔！ |
| [17:31] | Our skit was all in fun. | 我们的小品都是开玩笑的 |
| [17:34] | We were even worried about offending you. | 我们甚至都担心冒犯你们 |
| [17:36] | Why would you be offending? | 你们怎么会冒犯呢？ |
| [17:38] | You think you’re telling us stuff we don’t know? | 你以为你们说的是 我们不知道的？ |
| [17:41] | Marie knows she’s a big pain in the ass! | 玛丽知道她有多讨人嫌！ |
| [17:46] | And Frank knows he’s a pig with shoes. | 弗兰克也知道 他碰到鞋子像头猪 |
| [17:52] | Yeah, yeah, I tell you what would have been funny… | 是啊，是啊，我告诉你们 什么有意思…… |
| [17:54] | if you had talked about the time | 要是你们说了 |
| [17:55] | we drove the car through your house. | 我们开车穿过你们房子那回 |
| [18:02] | Now, that was hysterical! | 那可要笑破肚皮了！ |
| [18:06] | Okay, but… | 好了，不过…… |
| [18:08] | you know, I really did hurt my pinky that time. | 知道吗，我那回真的弄伤了小指头 |
| [18:12] | Oh, Raymond… | 哦，雷蒙德…… |
| [18:15] | Raymond… | 雷蒙德…… |
| [18:17] | you have to believe me… | 你得相信我…… |
| [18:19] | we didn’t mean to hurt your feelings | 我们不是有意用我们的小模仿 |
| [18:21] | with our little imitations. | 伤害你的感情 |
| [18:23] | But now that I know you both are so sensitive, | 不过现在我知道你们俩 都是那么敏感， |
| [18:26] | we will never make | 我们再也不会 |
| [18:29] | those kinds of jokes again. | 开这种玩笑了 |
| [18:31] | All right? | 好吗？ |
| [18:35] | Wait a minute. | Wait a minute. 等一等。 等一等 |
| [18:37] | Wait a minute… | 等一等…… |
| [18:38] | I mean, you’re implying that we can’t take a joke. | 我是说，你在暗示我们 不能被人开玩笑 |
| [18:41] | And, of course, we can. | 事实是，我们当然能 |
| [18:43] | Of course we can. I love to take a joke. | 我们当然可以。我喜欢让人笑话 |
| [18:44] | Yes. Now that we know that you were just kidding around, | 是的。现在我们知道 你们只是开玩笑了 |
| [18:48] | we are fine. | 我们没事 |
| [18:49] | We laugh at ourselves all the time. | 我们老是开自己玩笑 |
| [18:51] | Laughin’ and jokin’ all the time. | 老是笑啊、开玩笑啊 |
| [18:53] | I mean, everybody knows that he’s a whiney baby | 我是说，所有人都知道 他是个爱哭鼻子的宝宝 |
| [18:55] | who needs his mommy | 需要他妈妈 |
| [18:57] | and never does anything around the house… | 并且从不在家干活…… |
| [18:59] | That’s right, | 没错， |
| [19:00] | and you’re like an uptight, cranky yell machine. | 而你像是个紧张兮兮、 火大的嚷嚷机 |
| [19:03] | With stick-out ears. | 长着对招风耳 |
| [19:07] | Yeah. So you see, | 是啊。所以你们看， |
| [19:08] | we have a perfectly good sense of humor! | 我们幽默感好着呢！ |
| [19:11] | So everybody’s okay, then? | 那么大家都没事了？ |
| [19:13] | Yeah, sure. Sure, absolutely. | 是，当然。当然了，绝对的 |
| [19:14] | Are you kidding? We’re fun people! | 你开玩笑吗？ 我们是有趣的人！ |
| [19:18] | Okay, good. | 好的，好极了 |
| [19:20] | Oh, I’m so relieved. | 哦，我放心了 |
| [19:22] | Yeah, me, too, | 是的，我也是 |
| [19:24] | ’cause there was no way I was gonna stop with the jokes. | 因为我这些笑话 可是停不了了 |
| [19:28] | We don’t want you to. | 我不也不想让你停 |
| [19:30] | No way. That’s what families are all about. | 绝对的。这才是一家人 |
| [19:32] | Good night. | 晚安 |
| [19:33] | – All right. – It was fun. | – 好的 – 真好玩 |
| [19:35] | You know, I gotta tell ya, I really misjudged you guys. | 你知道，我得说， 我真的看错你们了 |
| [19:39] | You’re much better sports than I gave you credit for. | 你们比我认为的大度多了 |
| [19:41] | And your skit was funny, too. | 并且你们的小品 也很有意思 |
| [19:43] | – Thanks, Robert. – Thanks, man. | – 谢谢，罗伯特 – 谢谢，兄弟 |
| [19:45] | You know, like I always say… | 你知道，就像我一直说的…… |
| [19:47] | “Live, love, laugh.” | “生活、热爱、欢笑” |
| [19:52] | I’ll see ya. | 回头见 |
| [20:00] | “Cranky, uptight yell machine”?! | “大火、紧张的嚷嚷机器”？！ |
| [20:02] | Whoa! What about you? “Whiney baby, needy mommy!” | 喔啊！那你呢？ “哭鼻子宝宝，可怜的妈咪！” |
| [20:05] | I only say that because it’s true! | 我这么说只是因为 那是事实！ |
| [20:07] | Look out, don’t want to turn on the yell machine | 小心点，我可不想把 嚷嚷机开起来 |
| [20:09] | ’cause there’s no off switch! | 因为那个没有关的档！ |
| [20:10] | “Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! My wife is being mean to me.” | “妈咪！妈咪！妈咪！我老婆对我好坏” |
| [20:15] | Yeah. That’s a good comeback. | 是啊。很好的回音 |
| [20:17] | – “That’s a good comeback!” – Oh, there’s another one. | – “很好的回音！” – 哦，又来了 |
| [20:19] | – “Oh, there’s another one!” – Idiot! | – “哦，又来了！” – 白痴！ |
| [20:41] | Ten… | |
| [20:45] | eleven… | |
| [20:50] | wait a minute… | 等一等…… |
| [20:52] | there’s a teaspoon missing! | 一个茶匙不见了！ |
| [20:57] | There’s supposed to be twelve teaspoons… | 应该有12个茶匙的…… |
| [20:59] | there’s only eleven! Ma! What the hell! | 只有11个了！妈！怎么回事！ |
| [21:02] | What are you yappin’ about?! | 你瞎嚷嚷什么呢？！ |
| [21:04] | There’s supposed to be twelve teaspoons. | 这应该有12个茶匙的 |
| [21:06] | This is an incomplete set! | 这一套不全！ |
| [21:08] | What party are you gonna give with twelve guests? | 你什么派对上能有12个客人？ |
| [21:13] | A big party, ’cause it’ll be the reading of your will! | 大派对，因为那会是 读你的遗嘱的时候！ |
| [21:18] | Maybe it got scraped into the trash can. | 也许掉垃圾桶里了 |
| [21:21] | Maybe it’s in the trash. | 也许在垃圾桶里 |
| [21:46] | That is not funny! | 这可不好玩！ |