| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:05] | Michael come on. | 迈克尔 拜托 |
| [00:06] | I let you stay home yesterday now get up! | 我昨天已经让你呆家里了 现在给我起床! |
| [00:08] | The bus is gonna be here any minute. | 校车随时会来 |
| [00:10] | You can’t miss school again michael. | 你不能再请假了 迈克尔 |
| [00:12] | Michael get up! I am sick of this… | 迈克尔 起床! 真是烦透了… |
| [00:16] | Wait a minute! come back here! | 等一下! 回来! |
| [00:18] | Come back here right now. | 立刻给我回来 |
| [00:21] | You’ve got to help me. michael’s not getting up. | 你要帮帮我 迈克尔就是不肯起床 |
| [00:24] | All right all right. michael… | 好吧 好吧 Michael… |
| [00:27] | Michael this is your father speaking. | 迈克尔 你爸爸在说话呢 |
| [00:30] | Get up. | 起床 |
| [00:33] | All right what are you gonna do? | 好啦 你还能怎么样 |
| [00:34] | Easy. easy! all right all right. | 放松 放松! 好吧 好吧 |
| [00:36] | Come on michael. get up will you? | 拜托 迈克尔 起床 好吗 |
| [00:40] | Come on! | 拜托! |
| [00:42] | I’m sick! | 我不舒服! |
| [00:48] | he’s not sick. | 他没病 |
| [00:50] | let’s go come on. you’re not sick. | 起床吧 你没病 |
| [00:51] | Don’t try to fool around. what’s the matter with you? | 别开玩笑了 你哪里生病了 |
| [00:53] | It’s my stomach. | 我的肚子 |
| [00:55] | Where does it hurt? point. show me where. | 肚子哪里痛了 指给我看看 |
| [00:58] | It’s my head. | 是我的头 |
| [01:00] | Let’s go. come on. | 起床啊 快来 |
| [01:02] | – it’s time for school. – I’m sick! | -是时候要上学了 -我病了! |
| [01:03] | Yesterday he said he was sick. | 昨天他也说他病了 |
| [01:05] | Last night he’s running around | 昨晚还戴着帽子满屋跑 |
| [01:06] | with a cape on going “whoo-whoo!” | 还大声嚷嚷着”哇噢” |
| [01:08] | Last night you said you were sick | 昨天你也说病了 |
| [01:09] | and running around with a cape on going “whoo-whoo.” | 到晚上就戴着帽子满屋边跑边嚷 |
| [01:11] | He’s not gonna get away with it again. | 他不可以再那样做了 |
| [01:13] | You’re not getting away with that again. | 你不可以再这样做了 |
| [01:15] | Don’t just repeat what I say! | 别光重复说我的话啊! |
| [01:17] | All right. no don’t go back… | 好 不 不要盖… |
| [01:18] | michael Did you do your homework? | 迈克尔 你做作业了吗 |
| [01:22] | -Did he do his homework? -He said he didn’t have any. | -他做作业了吗 -他说他没有作业 |
| [01:23] | And you fell for that? | 而你竟然相信? |
| [01:25] | Oh boy I am gonna lie to you more. | 天啊 我以后要多对你撒谎了 |
| [01:28] | Mike. michael did you have homework due? | 迈克! 迈克尔 老师没有布置作业吗 |
| [01:31] | Leave me alone! | 离我远点! |
| [01:32] | You see? all right that’s it. | 看到了吗 没错 就是那样 |
| [01:34] | I know this game. I invented it! | 我懂这些招数 是我发明的! |
| [01:36] | The bus is coming! | 校车快到了! |
| [01:38] | All right michael the bus is coming. | 迈克尔 校车快到了 |
| [01:40] | I’m not fooling around. you’ve got to get up. | 我没跟你开玩笑 你必须起床 |
| [01:42] | – michael listen… – no! | -迈克尔 听着… -不! |
| [01:44] | If you miss that bus | 如果你没搭上校车 |
| [01:45] | I’m gonna have to drive you to school | 我就得开车送你上学 |
| [01:47] | And I’m gonna be late. | 然后我上班就会迟到 |
| [01:48] | I don’t care! | 不关我事! |
| [01:50] | You don’t care huh? | 不关你事? |
| [01:52] | How about I pick you up | 那不如我抱你上车 |
| [01:53] | And I carry you to the bus in your pajamas huh?! | 让你穿着睡衣到学校? |
| [01:56] | – maybe you care about that! – go away! | -或许那样你就关你事了吧 -走开! |
| [01:57] | – all right that’s it. – that’s not a good idea. | -好了 够了 -这可不是个好主意 |
| [02:00] | You got me into this we’re gonna do it my way. | 是你让我帮忙的 那就得按我的方法来做 |
| [02:02] | The bus is here! | 校车到了! |
| [02:04] | Hold that bus! | 别让车走! |
| [02:07] | – help me. help me. – ray! | -帮我 帮我 -雷! |
| [02:09] | Bite his hands. | 抓住他的手 |
| [02:11] | Just let him go. | 随他去吧 |
| [02:12] | You asked for my help. | 是你叫我帮忙的 |
| [02:14] | This is how I do it. | 我现在就在帮你啊 |
| [02:19] | The bus is gone! | 校车走了! |
| [02:26] | If he was wearing feet pajamas he’ still be in here. | 如果他的睡衣合身的话 裤子就不会脱出来了 |
| [02:37] | Hey. what are you doing here? | 你来干嘛 |
| [02:39] | – well amy’s working late tonight. – so? | -艾米要加班 -然后? |
| [02:42] | So I thought I’ come by and say hey to my little bro. | 然后我就想过来跟我小弟打声招呼 |
| [02:46] | What? a guy can’t stop by | 怎么 不可以让人过去 |
| [02:47] | And say hey to his little bro? | 跟他的小弟打声招呼吗 |
| [02:49] | There’s leftover macaroni and cheese in the fridge. | 冰箱里还有芝士海鲜意粉 |
| [02:53] | I’ll be in there. | 我马上去消灭它 |
| [02:57] | Hey how’s michael? | 迈克尔怎么样了 |
| [03:00] | Perfectly fine. he’s reading comics. | 很好 他在看漫画 |
| [03:02] | – is he going to school tomorrow? – I don’t know. | -他明天会去上学吗 -我不知道 |
| [03:05] | He stayed home from school again today? | 他今天又呆在家里没上学啊 |
| [03:07] | Yep. debra couldn’t get him to go. | 没错 戴贝拉没能让他起床 |
| [03:09] | Neither could you! | 你也没能啊! |
| [03:12] | I’ll tell you what the problem is debra. | 来让我告诉你问题出在哪 戴贝拉 |
| [03:14] | I was hoping you would marie. | 我也希望你能 玛莉 |
| [03:17] | You let the kids play those computer video-tronic games | 你让孩子们玩电脑游戏 打电玩 |
| [03:21] | And after that school is just boring to them. | 到最后 他们就觉得学校太无聊了 |
| [03:24] | It’s just an old lady talking. | 只是一个老女人在讲台上说话 |
| [03:27] | Where do you get those video-tronic games? | 你在哪买到的电玩游戏 |
| [03:32] | Why do I say anything? | 我干嘛要说话 |
| [03:35] | Exactly. | 对极了 |
| [03:38] | Something wrong with michael? | 迈克尔怎么了 |
| [03:40] | No. | 没事 |
| [03:41] | He missed school two days in a row. | 他连续缺课两天了 |
| [03:43] | Two days? is he sick? | 两天? 他生病了? |
| [03:45] | – no. – that’s truancy. | -没有 -那是逃学 |
| [03:49] | Not that I’ report it | 可不是我在吹嘘 |
| [03:51] | But please don’t make me choose between robert the uncle | 不过 别逼我在”罗伯特叔叔” |
| [03:54] | And ” robert the sworn defender of the law.” | 跟”法律的誓忠者罗伯特”之间做出选择 |
| [03:58] | How about you just stay robert the stink-footed oaf? | 不如还是”有脚臭的呆子罗伯特”? |
| [04:03] | Oh that’s funny. | 太好笑了 |
| [04:08] | I don’t know. I just don’t know what to do anymore. | 我不知道 真不知道还能做什么 |
| [04:12] | I could show you a couple of techniques | 我能教你几招 |
| [04:14] | I used to get these two mutts out of bed. | 以前我常用来叫这两个笨蛋起床的招 |
| [04:16] | We’re not gonna put ice cubes down his pants dad. | 爸 我们不会把冰块放进他裤子里的 |
| [04:21] | I’m not saying you start with that | 我没有要说那个 |
| [04:22] | I’m saying’ you start with what I used to call | 我要告诉她的那招叫做 |
| [04:24] | The dirty-sock alarm clock. | 臭袜子闹钟 |
| [04:29] | Oh frank that was disgusting. | 弗兰克 那太恶心了 |
| [04:32] | You reach way down to the bottom of the hamper… | 你一直翻到洗衣篮的最下面… |
| [04:34] | We’re not doing that frank. | 我们不会那样做的 弗兰克 |
| [04:37] | It’s called tough smelly love. | 这叫又臭又顽强的爱 |
| [04:40] | Sometimes he’ use my own sock against me. | 有几次他用我的臭袜子来熏我 |
| [04:52] | How come michael doesn’t want to go to school? | 迈克尔为什么不想上学啊 |
| [04:54] | Nobody wants to go to school. | 没人愿意上学 |
| [04:56] | He didn’t do his homework. | 他没做作业 |
| [04:58] | You wanna know how to motivate a kid? | 想知道怎样激发孩子的兴趣吗 |
| [05:01] | You get him something he really loves | 你让他爱上一样东西 |
| [05:03] | Then take it away. | 然后把它拿走 |
| [05:06] | – all right frank. – he likes trains right? | -够了 弗兰克 -他喜欢玩具火车 是吗 |
| [05:09] | So you get him a nice new steam locomotive… | 那你就给他买个新款的蒸汽火车头玩具 |
| [05:11] | Something that makes his face really light up. | 要能让他两眼发亮的那款哦 |
| [05:14] | Then you get a hammer… | 然后你再拿把锤子… |
| [05:24] | We’re not gonna smash his trains. | 我们不会砸烂他的玩具火车头 |
| [05:27] | Does he have a turtle? | 他有养乌龟吗 |
| [05:30] | Well you have to do something debra. | 那你也得做些什么啊 戴贝拉 |
| [05:33] | Why is this all on me? what about him? he lives here. | 怎么全是我 那他呢 他也住这儿啊 |
| [05:36] | Hey I tried. I had him halfway out the door this morning | 我试过啦 今早我让他半个身子起床了啊 |
| [05:39] | But she wouldn’t bite his hands. | 都怪她没抓开他的手 |
| [05:41] | Yeah then you run off to work and I’m stuck. | 是啊 然后你就上班了 就把我晾在那 |
| [05:44] | I had a lot of things to do today | 我今天事儿多着呢 |
| [05:46] | And I couldn’t because I had to stay here with michael. | 就是因为要留在家里陪迈克尔 我什么都做不成 |
| [05:48] | There’s always time to get your hair done dear. | 亲爱的 做头发什么时候都行啊 |
| [05:51] | I wasn’t going to do my hair. | 我没打算要做头发 |
| [05:57] | We should talk about that too. | 我们也该商量下你的头发要怎么做了 |
| [06:00] | You want me to go up there | 你要我上楼 |
| [06:02] | And explain the truancy laws in this county? | 跟他解释一下本国的逃学法吗 |
| [06:05] | Maybe drive him by the dock show him a couple bums? | 或者载他去码头 看看那些流浪汉? |
| [06:09] | I’ll go with you. where’s the hamper? | 我跟你一起去 铁锤在哪里 |
| [06:12] | All right stop it. | 够了 住手 |
| [06:13] | Look we appreciate your medieval advice | 我们很感谢你们古老的建议 |
| [06:16] | But we’ll do what needs to be done. | 不过我们会做该做的事情 |
| [06:18] | Michael is going to school tomorrow. | 迈克尔明天会去上学的了 |
| [06:20] | – but if there’s a problem… – there’s not gonna be a problem. | -但还有个问题… -没有问题的 |
| [06:22] | – but if there is… – there’s not gonna be. | -但如果有… -没有如果 |
| [06:23] | But if there is… | 但如果有… |
| [06:26] | – not gonna. – I won’t be here | -不会有 -我不会在的 |
| [06:30] | Cause I’m driving ally’s class to their field trip tomorrow. | 因为我明天要载艾丽跟她的同学去郊游 |
| [06:33] | – who’s gonna get him out of bed?! – I was thinking you. | -那谁叫他起床啊 -我想是你 |
| [06:36] | What about my job? | 那我的工作呢 |
| [06:38] | This is part of your job. | 那是你工作的一部分 |
| [06:39] | I mean my real job. | 我是说我真正的工作 |
| [06:47] | Let’s not fight. | 咱们别吵了 |
| [06:51] | Oh come on michael go to school! | 拜托 迈克尔 上学了! |
| [06:54] | You’re killin’ me man! | 你真是要我命啊 大哥! |
| [06:56] | – how’s it going? – he’s bustin’ my hump. | -怎样了 -他在浪费我时间 |
| [06:58] | You’ve got to do this okay? I’m gonna be late! | 你来吧好吗 我要迟到了! |
| [07:00] | I got 10 kids waiting for me and I’m late. | 十个小孩在等着我 而且我也迟到了 |
| [07:02] | But I’ve got to finish two columns | 我要写两个专栏 |
| [07:04] | And interview george steinbrenner! | 还要采访乔治·斯泰因布里纳(纽约扬基棒球队老板) |
| [07:06] | – sorry ray I got to go. – no no! you… | -对不起 雷 我得走了 -不! 你… |
| [07:08] | You come back here young lady! | 给我回来 小靓妹! |
| [07:10] | Old lady! | 死老太婆! |
| [07:12] | Who reminds me of my mom! | 你让我想起我妈! |
| [07:31] | All right. | 好吧 |
| [07:33] | I didn’t wanna do this | 我也不愿意这样 |
| [07:36] | But you leave me no choice. | 是你逼我的 |
| [07:41] | Oh great. the one day she does laundry. | 很好 她洗了衣服的一天 |
| [07:53] | Uh this is ray barone. | 我是雷·巴罗内 |
| [07:55] | I was supposed to come down | 我今早本来要过去 |
| [07:57] | And interview mr. steinbrenner this morning | 采访斯泰因布里纳先生的 |
| [07:59] | But unfortunately something’s come up. | 但很不幸的我手头刚好有点事 |
| [08:03] | Kind of a… family tragedy. | 类似那种…家庭悲剧 |
| [08:09] | No no I was just wondering | 不 我只是想问一下 |
| [08:10] | Could we do this on the phone? | 在电话里完成采访行吗 |
| [08:12] | Yes I’ll hold. thank you. | 好的 我不挂电话 谢谢 |
| [08:15] | Well look who’s up. | 看看谁起床了啊 |
| [08:18] | I’m hungry. | 我饿了 |
| [08:19] | Well breakfast time ended when the school bus left. | 校车离开时早饭时间也结束了 |
| [08:22] | So congratulations you get to stay home again today. | 那么恭喜了 你今天又能呆在家里了 |
| [08:25] | A couple of hours with daddy | 跟爸爸呆几个小时 |
| [08:26] | And you’re gonna be begging to go back to school. | 然后你就会求着回学校了 |
| [08:29] | Hello. | 你好 |
| [08:30] | Oh hi. yeah hi mr. steinbrenner. | 你好 你好 斯泰因布里纳先生 |
| [08:34] | Yeah tragedy right. | 是啊 人间悲剧 |
| [08:37] | My… mother. | 我的…妈妈 |
| [08:40] | Yeah but uh | 是的 不过 |
| [08:42] | She’ll pull through. she’s a tough old broad. | 她会康复的 她可是个坚强的老人 |
| [08:44] | Anyway I know you’re a busy man | 我知道你很忙 |
| [08:46] | And I just wanted to start by… | 所以我想从… |
| [08:50] | Excuse me. excuse me one second sir. | 不好意思 不好意思 等我一会儿 先生 |
| [08:52] | No tv! no tv! | 不许看电视! |
| [08:57] | No tv! | 不许看电视! |
| [08:58] | Yeah. hello! sorry about that. | 你好! 刚才不好意思 |
| [09:01] | No I can do this. sure. yeah. | 没事没事 我能做的 |
| [09:03] | Um okay well mainly I wanted to start | 好 主要呢 我想从… |
| [09:06] | By getting your feelings on revenue sharing. | 你对收益共享的看法开始 |
| [09:13] | No! | 不! |
| [09:15] | Okay well that’s a good point. | 嗯 这点说的很好 |
| [09:20] | And what about the smaller markets? | 那比较小型的市场呢 |
| [09:25] | You’re not eating doughnuts okay? | 你不可以吃面包圈 知道不 |
| [09:26] | no doughnuts for you! | 你不许吃! |
| [09:28] | L… yeah sorry. | 不好意思 |
| [09:30] | It’s the kids yeah. | 孩子的事 |
| [09:33] | Kids I know. | 孩子 我懂 |
| [09:34] | Too bad you can’t fire them. | 不能随便就把他们解雇了 |
| [09:37] | Although you probably have right? yeah. | 你应该也有孩子了吧 |
| [09:39] | Get down from there! stop it! hey… | 给我下来 住手 |
| [09:42] | Sit down! I will tell you when you are going to eat! | 坐下 我会告诉你什么时候你能吃东西的 |
| [09:47] | Oh. we’re done? | 结束访问? |
| [09:51] | Well… yeah. okay. | 好…好吧 |
| [09:54] | All right. thank you sir. | 谢谢你 先生 |
| [09:57] | Michael! | 迈克尔! |
| [09:59] | Put it down. put it down. | 给我放下 放下 |
| [10:01] | You know what you just did? | 你知道刚刚你做什么了吗 |
| [10:02] | Do you know who that was on the phone? | 你知道刚刚电话那头的是谁吗 |
| [10:04] | – no. – it doesn’t matter. | -不知道 -没关系 |
| [10:06] | George steinbrenner! | 乔治·斯泰因布里纳! |
| [10:10] | So none of this okay? | 不许吃这个 知道吗 |
| [10:11] | None of this captain sugar’s chocolate-covered sugar for you! | 不许吃这个什么糖衣船长巧克力! |
| [10:15] | You’re hungry? all right if you’re hungry here. | 饿了? 好 饿了就吃这个 |
| [10:18] | Here’s what you’re gonna eat. | 这就是你能吃的东西 |
| [10:19] | Fiber 100 all right?! yeah that’s right. | 纤维100分 知道吗 对了 就是这种 |
| [10:22] | No fun stuff okay? | 不许吃有趣的东西 |
| [10:24] | No cartoons on the box for you you’re… | 不许吃盒子上有卡通的东西 |
| [10:26] | You’re getting two grandmas on a bike | 你只许吃这种 有两个奶奶在单车上的这种 |
| [10:29] | The kind of crap I have to eat every day. | 这种我每天都要吃的垃圾 |
| [10:32] | Yeah. yeah. no maze to chocolate land. | 是的 没有巧克力迷宫 |
| [10:35] | Yeah you can read about colon health. | 不过你能看看肠道健康的文章 |
| [10:38] | So dig in! | 吃吧! |
| [10:40] | Here you go. | 还有这些 |
| [10:42] | Here’s some delicious skim milk for you. | 这是为你准备的脱脂牛奶 |
| [10:44] | Welcome to my world. | 欢迎进入我的生活 |
| [10:49] | All right listen here’s how i gonna go today | 好了 听着 我今天的安排如下 |
| [10:52] | No cartoons no video games | 没有卡通 没有电视游戏 |
| [10:54] | No computer games no fun okay? | 没有电脑游戏 不能玩乐 懂了吗 |
| [10:57] | First you’re gonna eat this wood. | 首先 你要吃掉这些 |
| [11:00] | Then you’re gonna get your homework | 然后你去把作业拿来 |
| [11:02] | And you’re gonna come downstairs to my office. | 跟着到楼下我的办公室 |
| [11:04] | It’s study hall. that’s right. | 那里是自修室 没错 |
| [11:07] | You’re gonna work right in front of me | 你要在我跟前做事 |
| [11:09] | Where I can keep an eye on you you got that? | 那样我才能盯着你 懂了吗 |
| [11:12] | I don’t have any homework. | 我没有作业 |
| [11:16] | Who do you think you’re dealing with here huh? | 你骗谁啊你? 哈? |
| [11:19] | I may seem stupid | 我可能看上去很笨 |
| [11:22] | But that’s just to get your mother | 但那样只是为了 |
| [11:24] | To not ask me to do stuff okay? | 让你妈别指使我做事 |
| [11:29] | I know all the angles pal. I know all the excuses. | 我知道所有戏码 兄弟 我知道所有的借口 |
| [11:32] | If my dog shamski had eaten as much homework as I said | 假如我的狗夏奇吃掉我做过的所有功课 |
| [11:35] | He would have pooped the “encyclopedia britannica.” | 它已经变成大英百科全书了 |
| [11:39] | All right? | 好吗 |
| [11:40] | So you just eat this | 你就把这个吃掉 |
| [11:42] | Then you’re getting your homework | 然后去拿作业 |
| [11:44] | And you’re coming downstairs. | 然后下楼 |
| [11:46] | I don’t have any. | 我没有作业 |
| [11:48] | You’re sticking’ with that story huh? | 还想骗我? 哈? |
| [11:51] | All right. well you know what? | 好吧 你知道吗 |
| [11:52] | You’re just gonna come downstairs | 那你就只是下楼 |
| [11:54] | And you’re gonna watch me work. | 然后看着我工作 |
| [11:56] | You think school is boring and meaningless | 你觉得上学无聊没意义 |
| [11:58] | Wait till you see what I do for a living. | 那你就见识一下我是做什么来养活你的吧 |
| [12:00] | Oh captain sugar. he’s coming with me. | 巧克力船长 他要来陪我 |
| [12:05] | Hey look a prize! | 看啊 中奖了 |
| [12:11] | This is boring. | 很无聊啊 |
| [12:13] | That’s right. | 这就对了 |
| [12:15] | Bet you wish you were back at school right now huh? | 我猜你现在想立刻回学校了吧 |
| [12:20] | No? not yet? all right well… | 不? 还不想? 那好吧… |
| [12:22] | Don’t worry. we’ll be done here in about… | 别担心 我们大概还有… |
| [12:25] | Oh five hours. | 五个小时就做完了 |
| [12:39] | – hey what are you doing? – reading. | -你在干嘛 -看书 |
| [12:42] | No no no. comics is not… | 不行不行 不许看漫画… |
| [12:44] | What is she wearing? | 她穿的是什么啊 |
| [12:47] | They should have ratings on this | 这本书怎么没评级啊 |
| [12:49] | Cause this is totally inappropriate. | 根本就不适合给孩子看 |
| [13:01] | All right pay attention. | 好啦 注意 |
| [13:03] | I’m gonna read you something that I’m working on. | 我要给你念些我写的东西 |
| [13:05] | It’s a baseball column. | 这可是棒球专栏 |
| [13:08] | “everybody always says the designated hitter | 大家都认为指定击球手 |
| [13:11] | Has taken the strategy out of the game. | 对比赛有着很好的战略思维 |
| [13:13] | You know is the manager gonna pinch-hit for the pitcher | 但一切只是教练为代打者击出的安打 |
| [13:16] | Or is he gonna leave him in? | 或者只是让不让这个人留下的问题 |
| [13:18] | I say w hat’s so exciting | 我觉得看这些肥头大耳的教练怎么想 |
| [13:20] | About watching some fat manager think? | 有什么让人兴奋的呢 |
| [13:24] | How’s that sound? | 怎么样? |
| [13:26] | Good. | 不错 |
| [13:27] | Yeah? what’s good about it? | 是吗 哪里不错了 |
| [13:30] | The fat manager. | 肥头大耳的教练 |
| [13:32] | It’s kind of funny isn’t it? | 很有趣 是吗 |
| [13:41] | All right… | 好吧… |
| [13:47] | The kids teased me. | 其他小朋友笑我 |
| [13:49] | What? | 什么 |
| [13:50] | In my class all the kids laughed at me. | 我的班里 其他小朋友都笑我 |
| [13:54] | The kids laughed at you? why? | 小朋友们笑你? 为什么 |
| [13:56] | I went up to the teacher to ask her a question | 我去老师那里问问题 |
| [13:59] | And I accidentally said “mommy.” | 然后我突然叫她”妈咪” |
| [14:03] | You called the teacher “mommy”? | 你叫老师”妈咪”? |
| [14:06] | Why? was the teacher yelling? | 为什么 老师也对你们大喊大叫? |
| [14:17] | Then I cried and everybody called me “crybaby.” | 然后我就哭了 接着大家都叫我”爱哭鬼” |
| [14:36] | I made you eat the fiber. | 我竟然逼你吃纤维素 |
| [14:55] | Speaking of baseball | 说到棒球 |
| [14:56] | Did I ever tell you the story about me and little league? | 我有没有跟你说过我在少年棒球联盟的事? |
| [15:00] | It’s kind of funny. | 很有趣… |
| [15:02] | It’s uh… | 是… |
| [15:04] | I was a little older than you | 我那时比你大一点 |
| [15:06] | And right before the game | 就在比赛前 |
| [15:08] | I had just drank a lot of kool-aid. | 我喝了很多”酷爱”果汁(卡夫公司旗下品牌) |
| [15:12] | So I had to go to the bathroom | 所以我要上厕所 |
| [15:14] | But I decided to hold it cause when I was a kid | 但我决定忍着 因为我小时候 |
| [15:16] | I didn’t like going to the bathroom. | 不喜欢上厕所 |
| [15:18] | Now I like going to the bathroom. I like it a lot. | 现在我喜欢上厕所 很喜欢 |
| [15:22] | So… | 然后… |
| [15:24] | It’s the third inning | 第三局的时候 |
| [15:26] | And I’m playing second base | 我守着二垒 |
| [15:27] | And I’ve gotta go real bad. | 我真的觉得很糟 |
| [15:29] | I’m scrunching my legs together. | 我两腿并在一起发抖 |
| [15:32] | I’m banging my mitt against my thigh. | 我用棒球手套打我大腿 |
| [15:34] | I’m trying to keep up the chatter real loud. | 一直大声的喊口号 |
| [15:37] | I thought if I screamed loud enough | 因为我本以为大声叫 |
| [15:39] | It would distract me. | 可以让我分心 |
| [15:40] | You know “hey batter batter | “猛击猛击 |
| [15:42] | Hey batter batter swing!” | 连续猛击! 挥击!” |
| [15:44] | But… couldn’t hold it. | 但…我没能忍着 |
| [15:48] | I started to go. | 我开始尿了 |
| [15:51] | You were on the field? | 在棒球场上? |
| [15:54] | Right between first and second. | 在一垒跟二垒之间 |
| [15:58] | It-it-it felt so bad… | 那种感觉很糟… |
| [16:02] | And yet so good. | 同时也很爽 |
| [16:10] | I still tried to keep up the chatter | 我还是大声叫着 |
| [16:12] | But it was more like… | 但更多的像是 |
| [16:14] | “hey batter batter hey | “猛击猛击 |
| [16:17] | Hey batter swing.” | 连续猛击! 挥击!” |
| [16:25] | So this… | 这个… |
| [16:27] | This dark spot is getting bigger and bigger. | 这个尿渍变得越来越大 |
| [16:30] | But nobody seemed to notice | 但貌似没人注意 |
| [16:32] | So I just thought soon as the inning’s over | 然后我想这局完了以后 |
| [16:35] | I’m just gonna run off the field | 我就立刻冲出球场 |
| [16:37] | Jump on my bike and ride home. | 跳上单车然后回家 |
| [16:39] | Just then I look up | 当我抬起头的时候 |
| [16:40] | And there’s dave malloy on our bench. | 戴夫·莫里在我们这边的长凳上 |
| [16:42] | “hey! | “看啊! |
| [16:46] | Look at barone!” | 你们看巴罗内!” |
| [17:00] | I look up and all the kids are laughing at me. | 我抬起头 所有的小朋友都在笑我 |
| [17:03] | My own teammates | 我的队员们 |
| [17:06] | They were pounding the fence they were laughing so hard. | 他们靠在栏杆上笑得死去活来 |
| [17:09] | And… | 还有… |
| [17:11] | There I was at second base… | 我站的地方 二垒… |
| [17:16] | Right in the middle of everything. | 是场子的中央 |
| [17:20] | What did you do? | 那你怎么办 |
| [17:22] | I did exactly what you’re supposed to do… | 做了你也打算做的事情… |
| [17:24] | I cried. | 我哭了 |
| [17:26] | I bawled my eyes out. | 我大声的哭 |
| [17:29] | I should’ve cried earlier. | 我或许应该早一点哭 |
| [17:30] | Maybe it would have diverted some of the pee into tears. | 那样有部分的尿尿可能就会变成眼泪 |
| [17:34] | – really? – no the body doesn’t work that way. | -真的吗 -假的 水分循环没这一项 |
| [17:40] | Anyway you know how in baseball you want a cool nickname? | 你知道在棒球赛里怎样得到一个很帅的小名吗 |
| [17:44] | You know like “hammerin’ hank” or “the big hurt”? | 像”铁榔头汉克”或者”禁区重伤”? |
| [17:48] | You know what the kids called me? “pee pee” raymond. | 你知道那些小朋友怎样叫我吗 尿尿鬼雷蒙德 |
| [17:52] | That’s pretty clever huh? | 很可爱 是吧 |
| [17:54] | “pee pee raymond! pee pee raymond!” | “尿尿鬼雷蒙德 尿尿鬼雷蒙德” |
| [17:58] | That was me… pee pee raymond. | 那就是我…”尿尿鬼雷蒙德” |
| [18:05] | That was a bad day. | 那天很糟 |
| [18:07] | It was like I had a rain delay in my pants. | 我裤子里好像下了一场迟来的雨 |
| [18:17] | So… | 那么… |
| [18:20] | That’s baseball. | 那就是棒球了 |
| [18:26] | Oh by the way | 对了 |
| [18:29] | A couple of days later | 几天后 |
| [18:31] | Kevin saganski is at the blackboard. | 凯文·沙甘奇在讲台上 |
| [18:33] | He bends down to pick up some chalk | 他弯腰减粉笔的时候 |
| [18:36] | His pants split wide open. | 他的裤子爆胎了 |
| [18:38] | All of a sudden I’m off the hook you know? | 就在那一瞬间 我解脱了 懂吗 |
| [18:41] | Pee pee raymond it’s old news now. | 尿尿鬼雷蒙德 已经是过时的新闻了 |
| [18:43] | The talk of the town? “butt-crack” saganski. | 城中热点? “爆胎”沙甘奇 |
| [18:51] | – that’s funny. – yeah. | -好好笑 -是啊 |
| [18:54] | Yeah it’s funny. | 是啊 好好笑 |
| [18:59] | Daddy? | 爸比? |
| [19:00] | Yeah? | 怎么啦 |
| [19:02] | I have to go to the bathroom. | 我要上厕所 |
| [19:07] | You know what? me too. | 是吗 我也是 |
| [19:12] | Let me tell you something else | 我再给你爆点料吧 |
| [19:14] | -You know what happened to butt-crack saganski? – what? | -你知道”爆胎”沙甘奇后来怎么了吗 -怎么了 |
| [19:17] | He’s now the president of fruit of the loom underwear. | 他现在是水果织布机内衣厂的厂长 |
| [19:28] | Dad’s still got the moves mikey! | 爸比还跟的上哦 迈奇 |
| [19:32] | I’m goin’ off the mat! | 我要跳开舞毯! |
| [19:36] | I am on fire! | 我很兴奋啊! |
| [19:38] | Hi mommy. | 妈咪好 |
| [19:47] | What are you doing? | 你在干嘛 |
| [19:49] | What am I doing? I’m getting all funky baby! | 我在干嘛 我在跳舞 宝贝 |
| [19:55] | Take over. | 你接着玩 |
| [20:02] | That’s hereditary that funk. | 那是遗传 那个懦夫 |
| [20:05] | So this is your solution? | 这就是你的解决办法? |
| [20:07] | Let him stay home all day and have a dance party? | 让他呆在家里玩跳舞毯? |
| [20:09] | He’s never gonna go to school again! | 他再也不会上学了! |
| [20:11] | – michael you going to school tomorrow? – yep. | -迈克尔 你明天去上学吗 -去 |
| [20:18] | Really? | 真的吗 |
| [20:20] | You heard the boy. | 你也听到孩子说什么啦 |
| [20:23] | Oh and uh | 还有 |
| [20:24] | When you pack his lunch tomorrow | 你明天给他弄便当的时候 |
| [20:26] | He wants a salami sandwich with chips… barbecue flavor. | 他想吃意大利腊肉三明治跟薯条 烧烤口味的 |
| [20:29] | Don’t give him the celery with peanut butter. | 别放芹菜跟花生酱 |
| [20:31] | He’s just gonna trade it for a fruit roll-up. | 他要用来换水果卷 |
| [20:33] | How did you do this? | 你是怎么做到的 |
| [20:36] | Well let’s just say our kids are lucky | 可以说我们的孩子很幸运 |
| [20:38] | That their father has led a very embarrassing life. | 因为他们的爸爸有段很尴尬的人生 |
| [20:42] | By the way I know why he didn’t go to school. | 对了 我知道他为什么不愿意上学了 |
| [20:45] | – why? – some of the kids were teasing him | -为什么 -别的小朋友取笑他 |
| [20:47] | Cause he called one of the teachers “mommy.” | 因为他叫他们的老师”妈咪” |
| [20:49] | He called one of the teachers “mommy”? | 他叫老师做”妈咪”? |
| [20:52] | Why? was the teacher yelling? | 为什么 他的老师也喜欢大喊大叫的吗 |
| [21:15] | Daddy! | 爸比! |
| [21:17] | Hey guys. how was school? | 小朋友们 学校怎样了 |
| [21:19] | – great! – yeah? what’ you do? | -棒极了 -是吗 你们怎么做到的 |
| [21:21] | Hey look! it’s pee pee raymond! | 看! 尿尿鬼雷蒙德! |
| [21:24] | Pee pee raymond! pee pee raymond! | 尿尿鬼雷蒙德! 尿尿鬼雷蒙德! |