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尖叫女王(Scream Queens)第2季第2集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计

Posted on 2024年7月12日 By jubentaici_movie_user 尖叫女王(Scream Queens)第2季第2集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计无评论
目录
S01E01
S01E03
S01E04
S01E05
S01E06
S01E07
S01E08
S01E09
S01E10
S01E11
S01E12
S01E13
S02E01
S02E02
S02E03
S02E04
S02E05
S02E06
S02E07
S02E08
S02E09
S02E10
时间 英文 中文
[00:09] So… a large plant murdered Ms. Hobart, 就是说 在你晕倒前
[00:12] and then attempted to murder you before you passed out. 一株大型植物杀了霍巴特小姐 还想杀你
[00:17] You were then awakened moments later by Mr. Jackson here, 后来杰克森先生把怪兽吓跑了
[00:20] who probably frightened the monster away. 叫醒了你
[00:25] And now Ms. Hobart’s body is missing. 现在霍巴特小姐的身体不见了
[00:29] Is that what you’d have us believe? 你是希望我们这样认为吗
[00:33] Or it was someone dressed up as a large plant. 或是有人扮成了一株大型植物
[00:38] Suspect can’t stick to a story. 嫌疑人口供前后矛盾
[00:41] What– suspect? 什么 嫌疑人
[00:44] How did I become a suspect? 我怎么成嫌疑人了
[00:46] I was… I was locked in the bathtub. 我当时被锁在浴缸里
[00:49] How could I have smeared a 200-foot trail 我怎么可能在走廊地板上
[00:53] of swamp slime across the hallway, 留下将近七十米的沼渍
[00:55] then decapitate a werewolf? 还把狼女的头砍下来
[00:57] I mean, why would I do that? Why? 我为什么要这么做 有什么意义
[01:02] Suspect unclear of her own motives. 嫌疑人对自己的犯罪动机不明
[01:06] I’m just curious, 冒昧问一下
[01:07] do you have to have graduated high school to become a detective? 当警探需要高中毕业吗
[01:10] No, ma’am. 不需要 女士
[01:11] I know what I saw, okay?! 我知道自己看见了什么
[01:13] There is a killer on the loose! 杀手仍然逍遥法外
[01:16] Chamberlain? 张伯伦
[01:17] Chamberlain, tell them. 张伯伦 你来说
[01:20] Well, I did hear them screaming, 我确实听到了尖叫声
[01:21] but by the time I got down here, 但是等我赶来的时候
[01:23] it was only Chanel #5 in the room. 屋子里只有香奈儿五号
[01:25] That is, until Dr. Munsch walked in. 然后蒙什博士就进来了
[01:27] Well, the Wi-Fi is down in my apartment. 我公寓无线网坏了
[01:30] I was on a Skype call in my office. 我当时在办公室打视频电话
[01:33] Dean Munsch. 蒙什教务长
[01:34] Number Five is obviously crazy. 香奈儿五号肯定是疯了
[01:36] She probably murdered Catherine herself for the attention, 也许就是她杀了凯瑟琳来博人眼球
[01:39] because she hasn’t been touched in months. 毕竟她已经几个月没被摸过了
[01:41] I don’t even think she’s touched herself. 她自己估计都没怎么摸过
[01:43] Even her hand thinks she’s gross. 连手都嫌她恶心
[01:44] The closest she’s gotten to sex is when a bookshelf fell on her. 她最接近性爱的体验是被书架压倒
[01:47] Yeah. Number Five is just jealous 没错 香奈儿五号就是嫉妒
[01:49] because Number Three and I got asked out 因为我和三号都分别被
[01:51] by Dr. Brock and Dr. Cascade, and she didn’t. 布洛克医生和加斯凯德医生约了 可她没有
[01:54] So while we were on our way to our hot double date in Bonetown, 所以当我们准备在《骨头镇》里四人约会时
[01:57] she decided to sabotage it, 她就决定要捣乱
[01:59] by killing a poor, defenseless, hairless creature. 趁无毛的可怜虫不注意 把她杀死了
[02:02] Hiding the body and forcing us to hurry back to listen to 藏好尸体后 逼我们赶回来
[02:04] the least-terrifying story anyone has ever heard. 听她讲这个史上最不恐怖的故事
[02:07] All right. 好吧
[02:08] I don’t think we’re ever gonna really know what happened here. 我觉得应该永远查不清真相了
[02:10] What?! 什么
[02:11] Sorry, sweetheart. The evidence is just inconclusive. 抱歉 证据不够充分
[02:14] Call me if anything else comes up. 有其他情况再打给我吧
[02:17] In the meantime, no more made-up stories that aren’t that scary. 还有 不要再编这种无聊的鬼故事了
[02:21] I’m telling the truth. I swear. 我说的是事实 我发誓
[02:31] Tyler, can you tell us when the growths first appeared? 泰勒 肿瘤什么时候开始出现的
[02:34] – About two years ago. – Hold on. -两年前吧 -等等
[02:39] Have you ever tried popping those? 你试过挤掉它们吗
[02:41] Nope. We’ve already talked about this. 不行 我们之前说好了
[02:43] I’m not gonna sit here while you try to demean another patient. 我不会坐视你欺负患者的
[02:45] I am not demeaning anyone. 我没欺负人
[02:48] I am being brash and confident, 我只是很自信
[02:50] because I am the out-of-the-box thinker 因为我的想法总能突破常规
[02:52] who brilliantly solved our last case 上位病人没做摘除额叶脑叶手术
[02:53] without resorting to a full-frontal lobotomy. 就被我出色地治好了
[02:56] Well… If I was gonna be mean, 我要是刻薄
[02:58] I’d ask him if he kissed a toad. 就会问他是不是亲过蛤蟆
[02:59] Or if he was a toad. 或者问他是不是只蛤蟆
[03:00] He at least had some lineage, like a toad grandparent. 他至少有些后代 像只蛤蟆爷爷
[03:03] Or if he rented out his pores on Airbnb 或者问他有没有把身上的毛孔
[03:05] for hundreds of expectant female spiders to lay their eggs in. 租给几百个育母蜘蛛用来产卵
[03:08] Okay, we get it. 我们明白了
[03:09] You’re not being mean. 你那不是刻薄
[03:12] Yes, um, I have tried it, but it hurts, 我试过 但很疼
[03:16] and it doesn’t work because they’re not zits. 而且没用 因为这不是青春痘
[03:18] I was diagnosed with neurofibromatosis type 1, 我被诊断患有一型神经纤维瘤病
[03:22] which my doctor said it was genetic. 医生说这病遗传
[03:24] Well, Tyler, there’s good news and bad news. 泰勒 有个好消息 还有个坏消息
[03:27] Good news is that there’s a machine called a CO2 laser 好消息是有种机器叫二氧化碳激光器
[03:31] that can shrink and eventually remove your tumors. 可以缩小并最终移除你的肿瘤
[03:33] It’s completely painless. 完全无痛
[03:35] Really? That’s-that’s great. 真的吗 太好了
[03:37] Well, you didn’t wait for the bad news. 还没说坏消息呢
[03:38] Yeah, the bad news is they’re-they’re cumbersome 坏消息是机器非常笨重
[03:40] and they’re super expensive and we don’t have one. 而且非常贵 我们这里没有
[03:42] I don’t have any money. 我没钱
[03:43] The only money I make is writing Encyclopedia Brown fan fiction. 我只靠写《布朗百科》同人小说赚钱
[03:46] I used to love Encyclopedia Brown. 我以前很爱看《布朗百科》
[03:48] Yeah, you would. 我猜也是
[03:49] Look at me. 看看我
[03:51] Look at me. I’m a monster. 看看我 我是个怪物
[03:53] I don’t have anywhere else to go. 我没有别的地方去了
[03:55] My life is a complete mess. 我的人生一团糟
[03:57] I’m desperate. 我都绝望了
[03:58] So can you please, please, just help me? 拜托你们帮帮我吧
[04:08] Zayday. 扎丹
[04:13] You don’t happen to know 你知道城里
[04:14] if there are any new Guinean restaurants in town, do you? 有新开的几内亚餐厅吗
[04:17] No. 不知道
[04:18] I didn’t even know that was a thing. 我都不知道还有这种餐厅
[04:20] Yeah. I just have a taste for it. 我只是突然馋了
[04:22] As you were. 你忙吧
[04:29] Chamberlain, right? 张伯伦 对吗
[04:31] Could I talk to you for a minute? 我能和你聊几句吗
[04:32] Okay, so you changed your mind; you want to go out with me. 你改主意了 想跟我约会了
[04:35] What? No. 什么 才不是
[04:37] It’s Munsch. 是关于蒙什
[04:39] There’s something bugging me about her, 她有些事我总是想不通
[04:40] and there’s nobody else I can talk to about it. 但又没办法和其他人说
[04:42] I’m suspicious. 我满腹疑惑
[04:43] I mean, why would she want to run a hospital in the first place? 她起初为什么要开这家医院
[04:46] I don’t know, to help people? 不知道 乐于助人
[04:48] Yeah, but she also was the dean of a university. 可她之前是大学教务长
[04:50] Why would she start a hospital to cure only a handful of people 为什么要开一家专治没几个人得的
[04:53] with really obscure diseases? 罕见病医院呢
[04:55] I mean, she had to pour every penny she had into this place. 她得砸入全部家当才行
[04:58] Who does that? 谁会这么干
[05:00] She is rich. 她很有钱
[05:01] And why would she hire me and the Chanels? 那她为什么要雇我和香奈儿们
[05:03] The Chanels are idiots, and she hates them. 香奈儿们是笨蛋 她也讨厌她们
[05:05] Like really hates them, hates them. 非常讨厌她们
[05:08] I believe you got a theory. I do. 我相信你已经有答案了
[05:10] There’s something about the story 那天五号说的故事
[05:11] that Number Five was telling the other day. 有些不对劲
[05:13] I mean, she said the swamp monster that killed Catherine 她说杀死凯瑟琳的沼泽怪物
[05:16] was about to kill her, and then you scared it off. 正准备杀她 后来却被你吓跑了
[05:19] And Dean Munsch was just upstairs 这段期间蒙什教务长
[05:20] in her office the whole time? 一直都在楼上的办公室吗
[05:23] After hours? 下班了还不走
[05:24] You said it yourself. 你自己说的
[05:25] Dean Munsch said good night to both you 蒙什教务长在凯瑟琳被杀前很久
[05:27] and Chanel Number Five long before Catherine was murdered. 就对你和香奈儿五号说了晚安
[05:31] – So what, you think she’s in on it? – She has to be. -你是说她在搞鬼吗 -一定是
[05:33] It’s the only thing that makes any of this make sense. 只有这样一切才讲得通
[05:36] I think she’s out for revenge. 我觉得她是来复仇的
[05:37] I think she gathered all the Chanels here in one place, 我觉得她是想把香奈儿都召集起来
[05:41] so she could knock them off one by one. 然后逐个除掉
[05:44] It’s like Ten Little Indians. 就像《无人生还》一样
[05:45] – Whoa, what? You can’t say that. – Ten Little Indians. -什么 别这么说 -《无人生还》
[05:48] Agatha Christie novel. 阿加莎·克里斯蒂的小说
[05:49] – That still doesn’t make it okay. – Look, okay. -还是没好到哪去 -好了 听着
[05:50] That’s not the point, the point is, 这都不是重点 重点是
[05:52] we have to get to the bottom of this… together. 我们要合力查出事情的真相
[05:55] And figure out exactly what Dean Munsch is after. 从而查出蒙什教务长的真正目的
[05:58] Okay. 好吧
[06:00] I’m in. 我加入
[06:01] It’s not a date. 这不是约会
[06:03] It’s not a date. 不是约会
[06:06] I’m so happy we rescheduled our May-December date. 真开心我们这对老少恋又能约会了
[06:11] How are you gonna eat all that popcorn? 你能吃得了这么多爆米花吗
[06:13] I’m not gonna eat any of it. 我一口都不吃
[06:15] You see, I buy the biggest tub of popcorn they sell 我买了柜台中最大的一桶
[06:17] and have them cover it in butter, 并且要裹上黄油
[06:18] and then I secretly drop handfuls of it 在看电影的时候
[06:19] on the floor as the movie plays. 偷偷地撒一把在地上
[06:21] I don’t understand. Why? 为什么要这么做
[06:23] To make the fatties feel bad about themselves. 为了让胖子们感到惭愧
[06:25] Then they feel terrible and eat more. 他们会很难过 然后就吃得更多
[06:27] It’s, like, my favorite hobby. 这可是我的一大嗜好
[06:29] You are the most incredible woman I’ve ever met. 你是我见过的最不可思议的女人
[06:31] Thank you. 谢谢你
[06:33] I’m having a really nice time. 我很开心
[06:49] Sorry. I’m sorry. 抱歉 对不起
[06:51] Are you kidding? 开什么玩笑
[06:53] I haven’t been manhandled in, like, two years. 我都两年没被男人摸过了
[06:56] Grope at will, Doctor. 随便摸 医生
[07:11] – Sorry, sorry, sir. – You could have just asked. -抱歉 -想吃就管我要啊
[07:13] I know. Here. Sorry. 知道了 给你 抱歉
[07:16] Oh, my God… wait. 天啊 等等
[07:18] Are you imitating the guy in the movie 你这是在模仿电影中
[07:19] with the out-of-control hand? 那个无法控制自己手的男人吗
[07:21] – Yeah. – That is amazing. -是啊 -太棒了
[07:24] You know, I never thought I could put my heart 失去了查德·雷德威尔以后
[07:26] back together again after losing Chad Radwell, 我以为破碎的心再也无法复原
[07:28] but after being with you tonight and your, 但今晚跟你在一起
[07:30] your amazing hand and your hot mouth, 你的手这么酷 还这么会说
[07:33] I know I’m finally ready to move on. 我知道自己终于可以抛下过去了
[07:43] Why are you so sad? 你怎么这么伤心
[07:47] My first boyfriend’s name was Clarence. 我第一任男朋友叫克拉伦斯
[07:51] He had hair like Richard Grieco and he played lacrosse, 他有着理查德·格里克的发型 会打曲棍球
[07:53] but… he was also imaginary. 但他也过于完美了
[07:56] We dated all throughout high school. 我们整个高中都在一起
[07:59] And the day before graduation, he broke up with me. 就在毕业前的一天 他跟我分手了
[08:02] I thought things would be different in college. 我以为到了大学会有所改观
[08:05] I mean, especially when I joined Kappa and became a Chanel, 尤其是我加入了卡帕 成为了香奈儿
[08:08] but then Chanel told everybody that I had teeth in my vagina, 但香奈儿跟所有人说我阴道长牙
[08:10] so it’s basically impossible for me to get a date. 所以根本没人愿意和我约会
[08:13] But I knew this would be different. 但我知道这会有所不同
[08:15] We’re supposed to be grownups now. 我们本该成熟了
[08:17] But it’s exactly the same. 但其实根本没变
[08:19] I mean, it’s only two weeks, and already Chanel 不过两周而已 香奈儿和香奈儿三号
[08:21] and Number Three have hot doctor boyfriends 已经勾搭到性感的医生当男朋友了
[08:23] and no one will even look at me. 而我 甚至没人愿意看我一眼
[08:25] I look like I’m wrapped in infected bubble wrap. 我看着像被感染的气泡膜包起来一样
[08:30] Shouldn’t be complaining to you. 我不该对你抱怨的
[08:31] Your life is so much worse. 你比我惨多了
[08:34] No, I don’t mind. 没关系
[08:35] I can’t even tell you how long it’s been 我都忘了有多久
[08:37] since a girl even talked to me. 没跟妹子说过话了
[08:39] Do you want to see what I used to look before all this? 你想看看我生病前的样子吗
[08:42] You were hot! 好帅啊
[08:44] Like, super hot. 太帅了
[08:47] I just don’t know how I’m gonna find the money for this laser. 我不知道能从哪儿弄来做激光治疗的钱
[08:59] I’m gonna find the money for that laser. 我会筹到治疗的费用
[09:00] I don’t know how, but I’m gonna find it. 虽然我还不知道该怎么办 但我会解决的
[10:14] Chad? 查德
[10:15] What the hell?! 搞什么鬼
[10:17] Oh, the look on your face. 你表情太逗了
[10:18] God, I knew I should have strapped a GoPro to my Red Devil mask. 我真该在红魔面具上装个摄像头
[10:24] What are you doing with your hand? 你伸手干嘛
[10:27] It wasn’t funny when you snuck into 你半夜潜入精神病院
[10:29] the insane asylum in the middle of the night 在我的床上吓唬我
[10:30] and scared me in my bed, and it’s not funny now. 一点都不好笑 现在也一样
[10:33] I thought it was pretty funny. 我觉得挺好笑
[10:34] Maybe not… Happy Gilmore funny. 可能没有《球场古惑仔》好笑
[10:35] Definitely Big Daddy funny. 但绝对跟《老爸向前冲》差不多
[10:36] What is that screaming? 这尖叫是怎么回事
[10:38] That’s my good buddy Randall. 我的好兄弟兰德尔
[10:40] He needs medical attention. 他需要治疗
[10:42] Think he’s gonna die. 他可能要死了
[10:48] I want you back. 回到我身边吧
[10:57] So we’re on our annual hunting trip 我们和圣刚丁顿国际秩序社团
[10:59] with the International Order of Saint Guntington. 参加了年度狩猎之旅
[11:01] It’s an elite secret society of hunters 那是个秘密的精英猎人社团
[11:03] that dates back to the Hapsburger Dynasty. 可追溯到哈普斯汉堡王朝
[11:06] Okay, did anything odd happen on the trip? 途中发生了什么怪事吗
[11:08] Was he bit by a tick or hit in the head? 他被蜱虫咬了 还是头被撞了
[11:12] That is an excellent question, C. 这问题非常好 小香
[11:16] Are you guys boning? 你们搞上了吗
[11:17] Went to the movies last night, I grabbed her boob. 我们昨晚看了电影 我抓了她右胸
[11:21] One boob? I thought doctors had game. 只有右胸 我还以为医生都有两把刷子呢
[11:23] – Why don’t you try two handfuls… – Okay, okay. -你怎么两手抓… -好了
[11:24] You can fight over Chanel’s breasts later. 你俩晚点再为香奈儿的胸吵架
[11:26] Though it would be sort of like going to war over the Falklands. 虽然有点像争夺福兰克群岛一样
[11:30] Lot of work for a relatively small and insignificant amount of land. 为了无关紧要的小块土地争夺不休
[11:34] Anyway, please continue. 总之 请继续
[11:37] Thank you. 谢谢
[11:37] So we’re on our annual quail swim with the Ordensbrothers RBG, 我们正跟奥丁兄弟会的RBG 比尔·帕塞尔斯
[11:41] Bill Parcells, Ted Danson. 还有泰德·丹森进行年度狩猎鹌鹑活动
[11:43] Giant covey of quail take off right in front of us, 突然一大群鹌鹑在我们面前飞起来
[11:46] we lower our guns to take ’em out. 我们拿枪瞄准 想打中它们
[11:47] Ginsberg… she bagged two, two or three. 金斯伯格 她打中了两三只
[11:49] Hell of a shot. All of a sudden, 打得真漂亮 首轮射击结束后
[11:51] a couple stragglers take off after the first volley of shots, 突然又有几只鹌鹑飞了起来
[11:54] Randal lowers his gun to take ’em out, 兰德尔正在瞄准
[11:56] when all of a sudden, Liz Cheney pops out. 利兹·切尼突然出现了
[11:58] And I think she was, like, peeing. 她好像在尿尿
[11:59] Anyway, Randal lowers his shotgun, 总之兰德尔瞄准后
[12:01] shoots her right in the face. 对着她的脸就是一枪
[12:03] Hope she was okay. 希望她没事
[12:05] No, I don’t. She’s awful. 我才不希望 她太贱了
[12:07] Your friend has the Jumping Frenchman of Maine disease. 你朋友患有惊吓反射紊乱症
[12:11] Watch this. 看好了
[12:13] We don’t have a full understanding 从生理角度来说
[12:14] of what causes it physiologically, 我们仍未完全了解病因
[12:15] but we do know sufferers of this disorder 但此类紊乱患者
[12:17] have an exaggerated startle reflex. 会有夸张的惊吓反射
[12:20] Like that. 就像这样
[12:21] You know, any slight little stimuli sort of sets him off. 任何微小的刺激都会让他发作
[12:26] Okay. 好了
[12:27] My guess is that 我觉得
[12:28] shooting liz Cheney in the face probably set this off. 射中利兹·切尼的脸可能是诱因
[12:31] Wow. Dr. Holt, you are… incredible. 霍尔特医生 你太厉害了
[12:34] Yeah? 是吗
[12:36] Did I tell you I started a band? 我跟你说我组乐队了吗
[12:38] I’m the lead singer. Front man. It’s called Gold-Plated Nutsack. 我是主唱 乐队叫做镀金蛋
[12:44] Please, please, somebody help me. 求求你们了 快救救我
[12:47] I feel like I’m gonna die from screaming. 我感觉我要尖叫致死了
[12:49] I’m sorry, Randal, but there… there’s no known cure. 抱歉 兰德尔 可这病目前没得治
[12:51] But that is the point of this hospital– 但这正是这所医院的意义
[12:55] to cure the heretofore incurable. 治愈曾经的不治之症
[12:59] So, don’t worry, Randal. 所以别担心 兰德尔
[13:00] We are going to help you out. 我们会帮你的
[13:02] You have my word. 我保证
[13:05] Sorry. 抱歉
[13:06] Nutsack. 蛋蛋
[13:12] How do you feel about revenge sex? 来一发复仇炮怎么样
[13:14] Hello, America. 美国你好
[13:15] My name is Chanel #5. 我是香奈儿五号
[13:17] And I’m here to ask you for help. 我需要你的帮助
[13:21] This is my friend Tyler. 这是我的朋友泰勒
[13:23] He used to be hot, 他原来很帅
[13:25] and now he’s covered in weird skin bubbles. 可现在他全身都是奇怪的包
[13:28] Hi. I’m Tyler, and two years ago, I was diagnosed with… 我是泰勒 两年前我被诊断出…
[13:32] Two years ago, he was diagnosed with neurofibromatosis type 1. 两年前他被诊断患有一型神经纤维瘤病
[13:36] It’s a crippling disease that turned this hot guy 这个严重的疾病 将这位帅小伙
[13:38] into a living, breathing monster. 变成了行尸走肉
[13:42] Won’t you please help him afford the expensive laser 恳请你资助他进行昂贵的激光治疗
[13:46] – that could end his torment? – Okay, I can’t watch this anymore. -让他能够摆脱困境 -我看不下去了
[13:48] Number Five, that is the worst fund-raising video ever made. 五号 这真是史上最烂的筹款视频
[13:53] What are you talking about? It’s really emotional. 说什么呢 这很煽情啊
[13:55] – It’s really not. – Okay, Number Five, -真心不煽情 -五号
[13:58] you’re going about this all wrong. 你这思路完全是错的
[14:01] But you want Tyler to get those laser treatments 你是想让泰勒做激光治疗
[14:03] so he’ll be hot again and you can date him, right? 这样他就能帅回去 你们就能约会了吧
[14:06] Well, Number Five, once he’s hot again, 五号 一旦他帅回去
[14:09] he’s not gonna want to date you. 他才不会想跟你约会呢
[14:11] Chanel’s right. 香奈儿说得没错
[14:12] The only shot you have with Tyler is if he stays all warty. 只有泰勒浑身是包 你们才有戏
[14:14] Look, if you want to be with Tyler, you need to go for him now, 如果你想和泰勒在一起 现在就得去陪着他
[14:17] be the girl that stood by him through his tumoriest days. 做那个陪他渡过”瘤”关的女孩
[14:20] Then when he’s hot again, 等他再变帅时
[14:21] he’ll feel obligated to stay with you and never leave. 他就会觉得必须要和你在一起 永不离开
[14:29] All right, what we got? 查到什么了
[14:31] Someone must have hired someone 肯定有人雇了
[14:32] from one of those online reputation redemption companies 某个在线挽回声誉公司的人
[14:35] to scrub clean any file on this hospital. 抹去了这家医院所有的记录
[14:38] And all that comes up on Google is stuff from when it first opened 谷歌上搜到的只有医院创立时间
[14:41] and an article about Dean Munsch buying the place. 还有一篇关于蒙什教务长买下这里的文章
[14:44] And a whole chunk from when it was just a normal hospital 在80年代 这里还只是普通医院时的
[14:46] in the 1980s is missing. 所有资料都不见了
[14:48] Look, what we need to do is go down to the local library 我们得去本地图书馆
[14:50] and just search the microfiche files. 搜索微缩文件
[14:52] You can’t scrub those. 那些是无法抹除的
[14:53] Oh, great idea. Let’s go. 好主意 我们走
[14:55] No, Zayday doesn’t go to the library. 扎丹不用去图书馆
[14:57] Chamberlain brings the library to Zayday. 张伯伦把图书馆送到扎丹面前
[14:59] I went this afternoon. 我下午去过了
[15:01] Libraries are very “Screepy” places. 图书馆非常”可怕诡异”
[15:04] Okay, but don’t we need a special machine 但是我们需要一个特殊仪器
[15:07] to be able to look at these things? 才能看这些东西吧
[15:09] All set up downstairs in the archives room. 楼下的档案室一切就绪
[15:17] I feel like I’m in one of those movies from the 1970s. 感觉像是身临70年代的电影
[15:26] This is from November 1, 1986. 日期是1986年11月1日
[15:30] The entire hospital staff was murdered on Halloween night. 万圣节之夜 医院全体员工被害
[15:40] Hey, what are you guys dressed as? 你们扮的是什么
[15:42] I am NASA’s Voyager 2 spacecraft. 我是美国宇航局的旅行者二号航天器
[15:44] And I’m Uranus. 我是天王星
[15:47] On January 24, NASA’s Voyager 2 1月24日 美国宇航局的旅行者二号
[15:51] made its first encounter with Uranus. 首次与天王星相遇
[15:54] And tonight Dr. Mike and I are gonna 今晚麦克医生和我准备
[15:56] recreate the encounter here on Earth. 让这一幕在地球上演
[15:59] Amazing! 太棒了
[16:01] Hey, do you guys want to go do some cocaine with us? 你们想跟我们一起嗑可卡因吗
[16:04] Not while “Mad About You” is playing. 我们得先看《为你疯狂》
[16:08] Maybe I shouldn’t be doing this. 或许我不该嗑药的
[16:10] I am still on call. 我还当值呢
[16:27] Leave me alone! 别杀我
[16:37] That mask looks familiar. 那面具很眼熟
[16:39] No. It can’t be. 不可能
[16:41] No. No one knows. I didn’t tell anybody. 没人知道 我谁都没说
[16:44] I didn’t tell anybody. 我谁都没说
[16:47] Hey! What do you want?! 你想干什么
[16:49] Who are you?! 你是谁
[17:16] Oh, my God! 天啊
[17:50] No one was arrested. 没人被逮捕归案
[17:51] They never found out who did it. 警方至今没找到凶手
[17:58] What have you two been doing? 你们来这里做什么
[18:01] Nothing? 没什么
[18:02] Are you feeling okay? 你还好吗
[18:04] I’m gonna be feeling great in about 15 minutes. 再过一刻钟 我就会感觉特别棒
[18:09] You live with the Chanels, right? 你和香奈儿们住在一起 对吧
[18:11] That’s right. 是的
[18:13] Would you mind providing detailed information as to their schedules? 你能告诉我她们的详细日程吗
[18:17] Like where they are at certain times of the day, 比如她们一天中某个时刻在哪里
[18:20] when they’re most likely to be alone. 她们什么时候最可能是独自一人
[18:23] Why would you need to know that? 你为什么要知道这些
[18:25] If I know where the Chanels are at any given time, 如果我能知道香奈儿们某个时刻在哪里
[18:26] I can make sure they can handle the workload they’ve been given, 我就能确保她们能完成被分配的工作量
[18:29] considering they’re idiots who aren’t doctors. 考虑到她们是没当上医生的白痴
[18:31] Well, in that case, you’d need to want 如果是这样 那你也要
[18:32] to know the same information about me, wouldn’t you? 知道我的信息吧
[18:34] Uh… yeah. Right. 是的
[18:39] Way you just said that made it seem like 可你刚刚说的话听上去
[18:40] you only want intels on the Chanels. 好像只想要香奈儿们的信息
[18:43] Well, what if I did? 是又怎样
[18:46] That would mean your explanation was a lie, 这就意味着你的解释是个谎言
[18:48] and I’d have a real problem with helping you. 我也不会帮你了
[18:50] Fine. If you can’t help me, I’ll find someone who can. 你不帮我 我还可以找别人
[18:57] Pick up my supplements. 把我的保健品捡起来
[19:07] Morning. 早
[19:14] What are you doing? 你在干什么
[19:16] Uh, showering? 洗澡啊
[19:18] My third of the day. 今天第三次了
[19:19] Like to stay extra fresh just in case emergency sex pops up. 洗得香喷喷以备不时的性需求
[19:22] This is an employee locker room. 这里是员工室
[19:26] Ah. Look, I get it. 我懂了
[19:27] Standing in here with me… 跟浑身涂满香皂的我
[19:31] all naked, sudsed up. 站在一起时
[19:34] You’re thinking to yourself, 你肯定会想
[19:35] “Wow! That is the last climber to summit Mount Chanel. “这就是上个征服了香奈儿的男人
[19:39] How am I supposed to compete with that?” 我怎么能和他比啊”
[19:41] Look, Chad, I’m a surgeon– a brilliant one. 查德 我是位天才外科医生
[19:46] You check off two boxes on the dateable guy checklist: 你具备值得约会的男人清单里面的两点[箱子]
[19:49] handsome and rich. 英俊和有钱
[19:50] And guess what, I check those, too. 知道吗 我也具备
[19:54] Okay, first of all, I have never heard of that checklist, 第一 我从来没听说过那清单
[19:56] so I call bull crap on that existing. 所以我觉得那狗屁不存在
[19:58] Oh, it exists. 确实存在
[20:00] Second, did you just call me handsome? 第二 你刚刚是夸我帅吗
[20:02] ‘Cause, given the circumstances, that’s a little weird. 鉴于当前情形 这有点奇怪
[20:05] Third… 第三
[20:07] I’m glad you brought up boxes. 很高兴你提到了箱子[私处]
[20:09] Isn’t that what this is all about– Chanel’s box? 我们不正是在说香奈儿的妹妹吗
[20:13] Well, guess what, 知道吗
[20:14] Dr. I Got Lucky guessing What’s Wrong With Chad’s Good Buddy Randal. 猜到查德好兄弟兰德尔病因的狗屎运医生
[20:20] The only dude in the shower 我们之间
[20:20] that’s ever gonna check Chanel’s box is me. 只有我可以干香奈儿
[20:24] I don’t know if I could stand for that, Chad. 这我可不一定能接受 查德
[20:28] Well, before this gets any more homoerotic… 在事情变得基情满满之前…
[20:30] I don’t think that’s possible. 应该不会
[20:32] I’m gonna do something I hoped I wouldn’t have to do. 我也不想用这样的方式
[20:35] We’re gonna settle this in the ancient Radwell tradition. 我们以古老的雷德威尔家族传统来解决此事
[20:38] You and me, local YMCA, squash. 咱俩在当地基督教青年会打场壁球
[20:42] First to 11. 11分制
[20:43] Best out of three, winner gets Chanel. 三局两胜 胜者赢得香奈儿
[20:45] That is awful and misogynistic to use a girl 把女生当做比赛获胜的奖品
[20:48] as a prize for a sporting event. 既恶心 又不尊重女性
[20:52] But Chanel’s worth it. 但香奈儿值得我这么做
[20:55] I’m in. 接受挑战
[21:00] Think our wieners just touched accidentally. 我们的老二好像不小心碰到了
[21:02] I know they think I’m crazy 我知道他们都认为我疯了
[21:03] because I tend to respond to everything 因为我对每件事的反应
[21:04] with the same extreme level of intensity, 都特别神经质
[21:06] but it was real. 但我没说谎
[21:08] I was attacked. 我被袭击了
[21:10] And I didn’t kill Werewolf Girl. 我没有杀狼女
[21:12] You know, I’m actually kind of an amateur detective, 我写了这么多《布朗百科》同人小说
[21:14] ’cause all the Encyclopedia Brown fan fiction I write. 所以也算是个业余侦探
[21:17] What if I helped you find proof? 我来帮你找证据怎么样
[21:18] And you will not even have to leave one quarter on the gas can. 你都不用在汽油桶上放25美分
[21:25] I don’t understand. 我不懂这个梗
[21:27] It’s an Encyclopedia Brown joke. 这是《布朗百科》上的笑话
[21:29] Yeah. I basically have zero personality. 其实我没什么个性
[21:34] I like your personality. 我欣赏你的性格
[21:36] You like his personality? 你欣赏他的性格
[21:38] And here we thought you were just into guys who look like… 我们还以为你喜欢看上去
[21:42] the inside of a hemorrhoid-infested butt. 像是痔疮长脸上的家伙呢
[21:46] Dude, he looks like 哇哦 他看起来像
[21:47] bubble wrap with a… with a staph infection. 感染了葡萄球菌的泡泡纸
[21:50] No, wait. I have a better one. 等等 我想到个更好笑的
[21:51] He looks like one of those… 他看起来像…
[21:56] You cannot speak to him this way! 不许你们这样说他
[21:58] He is a beautiful soul, 他有美丽的灵魂
[22:00] and I do not have teeth in my vagina! 而且我的阴道里没有长牙
[22:09] I’m… sorry. 我很抱歉
[22:11] Sometimes I tend to overreact a little bit 自从我停药之后
[22:13] since I stopped taking my meds. 偶尔会有点过激反应
[22:19] Can I help you? 有什么能帮你的吗
[22:22] Actually, you can. 就有
[22:23] Why did you have the online history of this hospital scrubbed? 你为什么把网上的本院历史都删除了
[22:27] What’s this all about? 怎么了吗
[22:27] On October 31, 1986, 1986年10月31日
[22:30] there was a mass murder in this hospital, 这家医院发生了大屠杀
[22:32] and all the evidence that was left behind was green slime. 凶手留下的唯一证据就是绿色粘液
[22:35] That same green slime was there 和香奈儿五号遇袭那晚
[22:37] the night that Chanel #5 was attacked, 看到的绿色粘液一样
[22:38] and you just happened to be there. 而你又碰巧在
[22:41] So what is your theory? 所以你的推断是什么
[22:42] You attacked Chanel #5. 是你攻击了香奈儿五号
[22:45] Or you had someone do it. 或是你找人干的
[22:46] Me, Chanel, Number Three, Number Five– 我 香奈儿 三号 五号…
[22:48] we’re your loose ends. 我们都是你的后患
[22:49] You gathered us all here in one place 你把我们全部聚集在一起
[22:51] so you could knock us off one by one. 方便你一个个地把我们做掉
[23:01] I could really use a friend right now. 我现在真的很需要朋友
[23:04] Just someone to talk to. 可以让我倾诉的人
[23:06] Just sit and listen. 请坐下 听我说
[23:15] What I’m gonna tell you is in the strictest of confidence. = = 我接下来说的事要绝对保密
[23:19] Is that understood? 明白吗
[23:25] I’m not trying to murder anyone. 我并没有要谋杀任何人
[23:28] I’m trying to save someone’s life. 我是想拯救某人的生命
[23:32] Mine. 我自己的
[23:35] The headaches started about eight months ago. 八个月前我开始有头痛症状
[23:38] Just blistering headaches. 只是剧烈头痛
[23:41] At first, I thought it was the stress 起先我以为是新书巡回宣传
[23:43] and excitement of my book tour. 带来的压力和兴奋造成
[23:45] Then the searing joint pain 接着关节开始剧痛
[23:47] and the shivering– I-I would freeze all night 还有打颤…我一整晚浑身发冷
[23:50] and wake up in a pool of sweat. 醒来时又满身大汗
[23:55] And then my neighbor… 后来我的邻居
[24:00] asked me why I was walking so weird. 问我为什么走路姿势怪异
[24:02] It was subtle at first, but then I noticed it, too. 一开始很轻微 但后来我自己也注意到了
[24:06] My gait has changed. 我的步态改变了
[24:09] I-I’ve been to doctors 我求助过医生
[24:12] and specialists. 以及专家
[24:14] They just… 他们
[24:17] they just don’t know what it is. 他们查不出是什么病
[24:19] In fact, they don’t think it’s anything. 实际上 他们不认为这是什么病
[24:21] But-but I know it’s something. I… 但我知道有问题 我…
[24:25] I just don’t think I have very long. 我感觉我时日不多了
[24:27] Look, I-I didn’t start this hospital 其实我创办这家医院
[24:29] because I give a rat’s ass 不是因为我对
[24:30] about the American health care system. 国家的医疗体系有半点关心
[24:32] I started it to find out what this disease was 我是为了赶在被病魔夺走生命前
[24:36] before it kills me. 查出是什么病
[24:37] I don’t think… 我不认为
[24:39] Dean Munsch, I’m so sorry. 蒙什教务长 非常抱歉
[24:41] Well, you know, the one thing to take into consideration is 你知道的 你唯一需要考虑的就是
[24:44] that you lived a long, productive life. 你已经拥有一段丰富多彩的人生
[24:50] Please, just help me. 拜托 就帮帮我
[24:51] Zayday, help me. 扎丹 帮帮我
[24:54] Please help find the cure. Please. 请帮忙找到治疗方法 拜托了
[26:31] What the hell are you? 你到底是什么人
[26:33] What’s going on? 发生什么事了
[26:35] Call the police! 快报警
[26:36] No, don’t call the police; they’re morons. 不 别报警 他们就是群白痴
[26:38] Oh, my God, are you okay? 我的上帝啊 你还好吗
[26:39] Number Five wasn’t lying. 五号没有说谎
[26:41] She was attacked, by this thing 她确实被这家伙袭击了
[26:43] that I think is responsible for all those murders here 我觉得三十年前这里发生的所有凶案
[26:46] 30 years ago! 都是他干的
[26:51] Oh, come on! 拜托
[26:53] Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me. 你一定是在逗我
[26:58] From now on, when someone has just fought off the killer 从现在开始 要是有人打倒了这个凶手
[27:01] and they’re about to reach down and pull off the mask 而且马上就要伸手扯下他的面具
[27:03] and find out who it is, not the time to distract them 看清真面目时 别用一堆问题
[27:08] with a bunch of questions! 分散人家的注意力
[27:10] Oh, I was so close! 我就差那么一点
[27:19] As it turns out, 结果表明
[27:19] Jumping Frenchman of Maine Disease 惊吓反射紊乱症
[27:21] is one of the more treatable rare disorders we encounter, 是我们遇到的罕见疾病中比较容易治疗的一种
[27:24] so you’ll be happy to know your friend is responding very well. 所以你会很高兴知道你朋友对治疗的反应不错
[27:27] The key… 关键
[27:29] The key is removing stimuli through sensory deprivation 关键在于通过感官剥夺移除外部刺激
[27:32] to calm down the neurotransmitters. 以此来使神经递质镇静下来
[27:34] Now, we provided an environment for Randal 现在 我们为兰德尔提供了一个
[27:36] where nothing will startle him. 不会受任何事物刺激的环境
[27:40] What are you talking about? He’s still screaming. 你在说什么 他还在尖叫啊
[27:42] Perhaps I-I whipped the drapes too fast. 大概是我窗帘拉得太快了
[27:45] Maybe next time I should try it slower, right? 下次我也许应该动作慢点 好吗
[27:48] Randal? 兰德尔
[27:50] Randy? Use the towel. 兰迪 用毛巾
[27:52] Try the bucket, Randal. 试试那个水桶 兰德尔
[27:53] Get– put it on your head. 把桶套在头上
[27:56] Good boy, Randy. 真乖 兰迪
[27:58] You see, Chad, when you’ve studied medicine as long as I have, 你看 查德 如果你学医跟我一样久的话
[28:00] you come to learn that sometimes, with treatment, 你就会明白有时候 在治疗过程中
[28:03] the symptoms get a little worse before they get better. 病患好转之前 其症状会加重一点
[28:06] What are you doing? 你在做什么
[28:08] Nothing. 没做什么
[28:09] Well, I’m placing my hand on your shoulder 我只是把手放在你肩膀上
[28:11] in a way that subtly asserts my dominance. 这是一种婉转彰显我权威的方式
[28:13] No… 不
[28:15] what is your other hand doing? 你另外一只手在做什么
[28:20] Nothing. 没什么
[28:22] What do you say we give Randal a little privacy, huh? 我们让兰德尔单独待一会吧 怎么样
[28:26] 鹅肝酱 品丽珠葡萄酒 芝麻菜沙拉
[28:31] Well, well, well. 好了 好了 好了
[28:34] It’s a damn good thing 你让匡蒂科
[28:36] you got Quantico’s finest on the case. 最棒的探员来查这案子绝对明智之举
[28:39] Do you know the number one lesson you learn as a top 你知道作为一位联调局顶尖学员学到的第一课
[28:43] FBI cadet? 是什么吗
[28:46] Trust your instincts. 相信你的直觉
[28:50] And do you know what my instincts told me 你知道我第一次见到扎丹·威廉姆斯时
[28:51] the first time I laid eyes on that Zayday Williams? 我的直觉告诉我什么吗
[28:54] I was like, “This bitch right here is a stone-cold ho.” 我当时想”这个小婊砸就是个冷血的贱货”
[28:59] She tried to accuse you of being the killer 她试图指责你是凶手
[29:02] just to deflect the attention off herself. 只是为了转移大家对她的注意力
[29:04] How do we prove it’s not me? 那怎么证明不是我做的
[29:06] Boom. I got you. Okay? 我会帮你的
[29:10] This is what I learned at Quantico. 我从匡提科学到了不少
[29:14] And by watching movies about Quantico. 我看了关于匡提科的电影
[29:16] Ooh, and from the hit TV show Quantico, 还看了热门电视剧《谍网》
[29:22] Here’s the thing: 是这样的
[29:23] If you want to catch a killer, 如果想抓住凶手
[29:25] you got to get inside the mind of a killer. 就要深入凶手的脑子
[29:29] Or in Zayday’s case, 对付扎丹呢
[29:30] underneath the weave of a killer. 要透过她的头发贴片
[29:34] And I know just the right person who can help us do it. 我知道谁在这事上能帮我们
[29:42] Do you think it’s weird that you’re, like, 60 你不觉得你都六十了
[29:44] and still working at a teaching hospital? 还在教学医院里工作很奇怪吗
[29:47] You should be out of school by now, bro. 你不应该还在学校
[29:49] You should’ve graduated. 你早就该毕业了
[29:58] Were you held back or something? 你之前在隐藏实力吗
[30:11] You obviously grew up playing squash. 你从小就打壁球吧
[30:13] I grew up playing Radwell-style water polo. 我从小到大打的都是本少爷自创水球
[30:15] Similar rules, except the horses get in the water on horseback. 规则和水球类似 只不过是骑着马在水里
[30:21] Actually, I’ve only been playing a couple years. 其实我只打了几年
[30:27] Whose hand is that, bro? 这是谁的手
[30:28] Anonymous donor. 匿名捐献者
[30:31] I’m done. 我走了
[30:33] Oh, I’m not. 我还没打够
[30:34] I’m just getting started. 这才刚热身
[30:35] Oh, and if you think being a doctor 还有要是你觉得当医生
[30:36] gives you some sort of advantage over me, 就让你比我更了不起
[30:38] you’re wrong. ‘Cause guess what. 你想多了 因为
[30:41] I’m about to become a doctor, too. 我也要做医生了
[30:43] You realize it takes years? 你知道要学好多年吗
[30:46] I’m playing the long game. 我要打持久战
[30:53] Back off Chanel. 离香奈儿远点
[30:54] And back off me. 离我远点
[30:56] This hand is capable of a lot more than playing squash. 这只手不只是会打壁球而已
[31:14] She’s down at the end. 她就在走廊尽头
[31:19] I’ll be watching. 我会看着你们的
[31:21] You’ll be fine. 没事的
[31:31] Look at my cake. 看我的蛋糕
[31:34] Oh, that guy just threw birthday cake frosting in my hair! 那家伙把生日蛋糕糖霜扔到我头发上了
[31:46] Hello, Chanel. 你好啊 香奈儿
[31:47] Dean Munsch. 蒙什校长
[31:48] Chanel #3. 香奈儿三号
[31:50] Special Agent Denise Hemphill, 迪尼斯·亨普希尔特别探员
[31:53] FBI. 联邦调查员
[31:55] Those, uh, drawings are real nice. 那些画真好看
[31:57] They’re from memory. 都是靠记忆画的
[31:59] Memory is all I have now that I don’t have a view. 我现在没有景观只能靠记忆了
[32:01] Glad to hear you’re doing well. 你过得好我们就放心了
[32:04] – We just wanted to ask you a couple questions. – No. -我们只是想问你几个问题 -不
[32:06] You were just gaining my trust back 你夸我的画
[32:07] by complimenting my drawings, 是为了重获我的信任
[32:09] and now this ham-handed segue into asking about 还能拙劣地过渡到问起
[32:12] the attacks that happened at your hospital. 你们医院的攻击事件
[32:14] Oh, sookie, sookie now! 不得了了
[32:16] Now how’d you know about that? 你怎么知道的
[32:18] Tell me, do these attacks happen in the dead of night 那些攻击是不是都发生在夜深人静
[32:21] during the graveyard shift 凌晨值班时
[32:22] when most of your staff has already left? 员工走得差不多的时候吗
[32:25] Yes. 是的
[32:25] And does this killer wear a mask with horns 凶手是不是戴着有角面具
[32:28] and does he or she leave a trail of green slime 是否所到之处
[32:31] wherever he goes? 留下一道绿色黏液呢
[32:33] You know who the killer is, don’t you? 你知道谁是凶手 对吧
[32:35] I also know that there’s a connection 我还知道这跟三十年前的
[32:36] to the Halloween murders that happened 30 years ago. 万圣节谋杀案有关联
[32:40] The clues are right in front of your face. 线索就在你眼前
[32:42] You just don’t see them. 你只是没有意识到
[32:43] Just tell us who the killer is! 告诉我们谁是凶手
[32:45] Quid pro quo, Chanel. 我有条件 香奈儿
[32:46] I’ll tell you everything that I know. 我会告诉你所有我知道的事情
[32:49] But first, I want a transfer to your hospital 但首先 我要转到你们医院
[32:51] and I want a room with a view. 要带景观的房间
[32:53] – You’re insane. – I’m not finished. -你做梦 -我还没说完
[32:55] ‘Cause I have a list 我还有一张清单
[32:56] of some super-high-end beauty products that I want. 上面有我要的超高端美容产品
[32:59] I want a three-ounce bottle of Lab Systique’s 奥秘实验室出品的八十五毫升装
[33:01] SUPER “M” age-defying face serum. 超级滋润抗衰老脸部精华
[33:03] It really just makes your skin extra glowy. 能让肌肤格外有光泽
[33:05] And a bottle of Sergio Jergoni’s 还有赛尔奥·吉奥尼的
[33:06] Luminoquintessence Color Control Brightening Moisturizer. 臻致雪颜提亮滋润CC霜
[33:10] It will wake up any skin tone. 唤醒提亮任何肤色
[33:12] Hester, you know that’s impossible! 海丝特 你知道这是不可能的
[33:14] Those products were discontinued, like, ten years ago. 这些产品十年前就停产了
[33:16] You’re just gonna have to start trawling Craigslist 那你得赶紧开始翻遍克雷格列表
[33:18] for an estate sale of old French whores. 找个老女人的遗物大甩卖
[33:21] Until then, you better start praying 在那之前 你最好祈祷
[33:24] that this Green Meanie doesn’t kill again. 绿魔不会再大开杀戒
[33:26] Bitch, ain’t nobody got time for that! 小婊砸 没工夫伺候你
[33:29] You better take this damn ChapStick 你还是收了这只润唇膏
[33:30] and tell us what we need to know. 然后告诉我们想知道的事情
[33:37] You have my requests. 你们收到我的要求了
[33:40] Now fly away, little birds. 可以跪安了 小朋友们
[33:43] Fly, fly. Fly, fly, fly. 退下吧 退下吧
[33:50] I have a nice time tonight. 我今晚很开心
[33:52] Me, too. 我也是
[33:54] You really had my back. 你真的很挺我
[34:07] Surprise. 惊喜
[34:10] What is going on? 怎么回事
[34:11] You passed the test. 你通过了考验
[34:12] What test? 什么考验
[34:13] You saw somebody that society had decided was hideous, 你看着一个大众视为丑恶可怕的人
[34:16] and you chose to look past it and see the human being underneath. 忽略了外表而看到他内在的人格
[34:20] That is something worth celebrating! 那是值得庆祝的事情
[34:23] Well… thanks, I guess. 谢谢
[34:26] Not you. Him. 没夸你 说的是他
[34:27] We were testing him. 我们在考验他
[34:28] – What? – Tyler, -什么 -泰勒
[34:30] you have truly learned the lesson 看来你已经真正明白了
[34:32] that looks aren’t the only thing that matters. 外表并不是最重要的东西
[34:34] So we’ve decided to reward you 所以我们决定奖励你
[34:35] by purchasing the laser for your treatment. 给你买一台治疗用的激光仪
[34:38] Wait. What? 等等 什么
[34:42] Wait. How did you get the money? 等等 你们哪来的钱
[34:44] I asked Chad for it. 找查德要的
[34:45] I told him it was for an experimental weapons-grade pube laser 我告诉他是中国军方研制的
[34:47] that was developed by the Chinese military 实验阶段的武器级激光除阴毛仪
[34:49] to give me a permanently stubble-free box. 给我的下面做永久性激光脱毛
[34:51] He started writing the check before I even finished that phrase. 我还没说完他就写好支票了
[34:53] – Thank you. – No. -谢谢 -别
[34:58] So what’d you find out, dick? 有什么发现 迪克[混蛋]
[34:59] No, I-I prefer Richard. 别 我还是习惯被称为理查德
[35:01] No “Richards” go by “Dick” since Nixon. 从尼克松之后就没有人昵称理查德为迪克了
[35:04] I don’t know what you’re talking about. 我不懂你在说什么
[35:05] I’m calling you “Dick” because your late. 我叫你混蛋是因为你迟到了
[35:08] Okay, let’s start with the side stuff. 咱们先从不要紧的事说起
[35:10] Then let’s move on to Dr. Holt. 然后再说霍尔特医生的事
[35:11] Okay, well, so, all of the girls 那些看了你
[35:13] that I showed that picture of your penis to… 阴茎照片的姑娘们
[35:15] …thought that it looked very nice, but 觉得它很带感
[35:17] a few of them commented about the way it, quote, 但引用其中几位的话来说
[35:20] “Bends at kind of an extreme right angle.” “将近弯成了直角”
[35:23] – Continue. – Okay. -继续 -好的
[35:25] As for, uh, Dr. Holt and his mystery hand, 至于霍尔特医生和他疑雾重重的手
[35:28] let me just say this, bombshell. 不得不说这是个爆炸性消息
[35:32] I cross-referenced “donated hand” 我将”捐献手”
[35:34] and “squash champion,” 和”壁球冠军”交互引用
[35:35] and I came up with a name: Marshall Winthrop. 得到了马歇尔·温思罗普这个名字
[35:39] Winthrop was this world-champion squash player. 温思罗普曾是壁球的世界冠军
[35:41] He won a bronze medal at the Olympics. 并在奥运会摘得铜牌
[35:43] But beating his opponents on the court did not satisfy him. 但是仅仅在赛场上击败对手并不能满足他
[35:47] He hated them for losing. 他痛恨败者
[35:49] He considered it a sign of disrespect 他认为这是对他所深爱着的
[35:52] to the game he loved so much. 体育项目的一种侮辱
[36:00] He started cruising for squash opponents on Craigslist. 他开始从克雷格列表网站上搜寻对手
[36:04] He drew them in with the promise of a game 他靠着与世界最强选手比赛的旗号
[36:06] against one of the world’s best. 吸引对手
[36:07] But all of them lost not only the game, 但他们所有人都不只输了比赛
[36:09] they lost their lives. 还丢了性命
[36:11] Over 600 poor souls. 超过六百人无辜死去
[36:16] Did… did you order me something? 你 你没给我点些什么吗
[36:19] Richard, 理查德
[36:20] we eat when we’re hungry. 我们进食只为果腹
[36:21] Not when we want to. 并非是满足口腹之欲
[36:23] – Right. – Keep going. -没错 -继续
[36:27] So Winthrop was kind of an idiot, 温斯洛普在某种程度上来说是个白痴
[36:29] because eventually the police tracked him down 因为警察们最终靠克雷格列表上的广告
[36:32] through the Craigslist ads. 追查到了他
[36:34] He was arrested before he could finish 他一定本能地意识到了
[36:36] what he must have instinctively known 被捕时都没能享用完
[36:38] was going to be his last supper– 最后的晚餐
[36:41] fois gras rillettes, Cabernet Franc, rocket salad. 香煎鹅肝酱 品丽珠红酒和芝麻菜色拉
[36:45] Same menu Brock’s hand was subconsciously writing. 和布洛克潜意识写下的菜单一致
[36:52] Richard, what did we say about personal space? 理查德 我们能注意下私人空间吗
[36:56] He was executed by the state, 直到他成为一名全身器官捐赠者了
[36:58] but not before he became a full-body organ donor. 州法院才判处他死刑
[37:02] Oh, my God. 天啊
[37:04] That means… 那就意味着
[37:06] Dr. Brock Holt has the hand 布洛克·霍尔特医生拥有一只
[37:08] of one of the world’s most notorious serial killers. 世界上最臭名昭著的连环杀手的手
[37:15] Shouldn’t this guy be under anesthesia? 这个人不应该接受麻醉吗
[37:17] He’s dead. 他已经死了
[37:19] Practicing some new techniques. 练练新技术
[37:21] Does it bother you that when you spank it, 你”打”的时候其实成了基佬
[37:23] you’re being totally gay? 会困扰你吗
[37:25] – Excuse me? – And you’re celebrating Palm Sunday -什么 -还有你打飞机
[37:27] with another bro’s hand, so… 还要用另一个人的手
[37:29] These are my hands. 它们是我的手
[37:31] You know, my best bro in college was gay. 我大学里最好的哥们儿就是个基佬
[37:34] Till he got murdered. 到死都是
[37:35] Which brings my next question. 那么下一个问题就来了
[37:37] Is it weird for you that the hand that burps your worm 你觉得撸管用的
[37:39] is the hand of a serial killer? 是连环杀手的手奇怪吗
[37:44] So now you know my secret. 所以你现在知道我的秘密了
[37:49] What are you gonna do about it? 你想怎样
[37:51] Oh, you’ll find out. 你会知道的
[38:00] This is driving me insane! 这快把我逼疯了
[38:00] Most of Dean Munsch’s symptoms make sense 蒙什教务长的大部分症状都说得通
[38:04] headaches, chills, joint pains. 头疼 发冷 关节痛
[38:06] That sounds autoimmune to me. 这些症状像是自体免疫
[38:08] But this… 但这
[38:09] funny walking thing– that’s messing me up! 走路很奇怪 真是把我搞糊涂了
[38:13] A strange gait? 奇怪的步态
[38:14] It’s not a symptom for anything. 这不是任何病的症状
[38:16] Okay, can I be totally honest with you? 好吧 我能跟你说实话吗
[38:18] I am really hungry, 我好饿
[38:19] and I’m having a hard time concentrating. 根本没法集中精力
[38:21] I’ve been over there scrolling through 我已经翻看
[38:23] Julianna Margulies’s best Emmy looks 朱莉安娜·玛格丽丝的艾美奖最佳着装
[38:25] for the past 45 minutes. 看了四十五分钟了
[38:26] I know this good Chinese spot. 我知道有个不错的中国餐馆
[38:28] The Szechuan Flavor Palace? 川味酒家吗
[38:31] No. Last time I ate there, I got sick. 不行 上次我在那儿吃完就生病了
[38:33] All right, well, you like Ethiopian food, 好吧 你想吃埃塞俄比亚菜吗
[38:35] they got one across the street. 马路对面就有一家
[38:36] But they close at 9:00, so we got to hurry up. 但他们九点关门 咱们得快点
[38:40] That’s it. 我知道了
[38:44] You haven’t been to New Guinea lately, have you? 你最近没去过新几内亚吧
[38:48] As a matter of fact, I have. 事实上 我去了
[38:50] You know, it was the last leg of my book tour. 那是我新书巡回宣传的最后一站
[38:52] My agent’s assistant– moron– screwed up, 我的代理的白痴助手搞砸了
[38:56] and I was supposed to do a book signing in Princeton, 我本来应该去新泽西的
[38:58] New Jersey, and instead she put me on a plane 普林斯顿大学开签售会的 但她送我上了
[39:00] to Papua, New Guinea. 飞往巴布亚新几内亚的飞机
[39:03] Anyway, that’s where I met Swando, 我就是在那儿遇上斯万多的
[39:07] who is a fantastic Papuan medicine man. 他是个医术精湛的巴布亚巫医
[39:10] And he invited me to this amazing party 他邀请我去了一个很棒的派对
[39:15] where I ate this delicious sort of custardy, 在那里我吃到了一种像丝滑可口
[39:19] eggy, scrambled thing. 绵软 炒出来的东西
[39:20] Uh, most delicious thing I’ve ever eaten. 是我吃过最好吃的东西
[39:23] What? Is there a problem? 啥 有什么问题吗
[39:25] I’m afraid you have kuru. 我想你得了新几内亚震颤病
[39:28] – What the hell’s kuru? – It’s a disease -新几内亚什么 -是食人者
[39:29] that cannibalists get after they eat people. 吃完人肉之后得的一种病
[39:32] – I beg your pardon. – He’s right. -你瞎说什么 -他说得对
[39:34] It was first discovered in New Guinea 这种病首先是在新几内亚的
[39:35] where certain tribes would eat the bodies 某些会吃掉他们死去家人的
[39:37] of their deceased family members. 部落中发现的
[39:38] Anyone who consumed the contaminated brain tissue 吃了被感染的脑组织的人
[39:40] would contract the disease. 就会染上这种病
[39:43] Oh, no. 不
[39:46] Oh, I just remembered. 我刚想起来
[39:48] Swando’s fantastic party was, in fact, a funeral. 斯万多那很棒的派对实际上 是个葬礼
[39:54] Okay. Well… 好吧
[39:57] So what’s the treatment? 这病有治吗
[39:59] I’m sorry, Dean Munsch, 不好意思 蒙什教务长
[40:02] but if you already have the symptoms, 但如果你已经出现症状了
[40:04] the literature states that you have less than a year to live. 文献上说你活不到一年了
[40:08] There is no cure. 这病无药可医
[40:10] Oh, my God. 我的天啊
[40:12] This is a secret. 这是个秘密
[40:14] You can tell no one. 千万别告诉别人
[40:15] No one must know, because if the board finds out, 谁都不能知道 如果董事会知道了这事
[40:19] they’ll think I’m unfit to run the hospital. 他们会认为我无法再管理医院了
[40:22] We will keep it a secret. 我们会保密的
[40:24] So then, they finally admitted they were my parents, 他们终于承认了他们是我的父母
[40:27] but only on the condition that I never tell anyone. 但前提是我不能告诉任何人
[40:30] But I feel like I can tell you, because… 但我觉得我可以告诉你 因为
[40:33] I’m your boyfriend. 我是你男朋友
[40:34] Say it loud and proud, Chanel #5. 大声而骄傲的说出来 香奈儿五号
[40:37] I’m your boyfriend, and you’re my girlfriend. 我是你男朋友 你是我女朋友
[40:40] Thank you so much for seeing the real me 谢谢你能看到这些肿瘤之下
[40:42] beneath all these tumors. 真实的我
[40:44] Thank you for seeing the real me beneath all of Chanel’s lies. 谢谢你看到了香奈儿的谎言掩盖下真实的我
[40:56] Hey, I forgot to tell you. 忘了跟你说
[40:57] Yesterday, I went on OurOwnPrivateIdaville.com. 昨天我上了艾达维尔镇生活网
[40:59] It’s one of my favorite encyclopedia Brown message boards. 是我最喜欢的《布朗百科》的留言板
[41:02] And I let the Encyclopedia Brown hive mind 然后让《布朗百科》的众智
[41:04] try and solve the case of the Green Meanie who attacked you. 努力找出攻击你的绿魔是谁
[41:06] Did you find something? 你发现什么了吗
[41:07] Whoa, did I ever. 那还用说
[41:09] You’re not gonna believe this. It’s a game-changer. 你不会相信这事 这是个神转折
[41:12] Oh, hey, what’s happening? 怎么回事
[41:15] I’m going into surgery now? 我现在要去做手术了吗
[41:17] That’s… that’s amazing! 这太不可思议了
[41:19] Did you plan this? 是你策划的吗
[41:20] You sneaky little girl. 你这个狡猾的小姑娘
[41:22] Wait, wait. 等等
[41:23] No, you’re not supposed to have surgery until tomorrow. 不 你明天才做手术
[41:26] Hey, hey, I got to go. They’re wheeling me away. 我得走了 他们要推我走了
[41:28] Look, I love you so much, 听着 我好爱你
[41:29] and I promise i’m gonna keep loving you even when I’m hot. 我保证就算我变帅了也一样爱你
[41:34] Baby! 宝贝
[41:35] Hey, did you guys know anything 你们知道泰勒的手术
[41:36] about Tyler’s surgery being moved up to tonight? 改到今晚了吗
[41:39] There’s no way that’s happening, 这不可能
[41:40] because we just left Brock and Cassidy, 我们刚刚才跟布洛克和卡西迪分开呢
[41:41] and they said they were going home to have a handsome contest. 他俩说要回家比比谁更帅
[41:44] It’s where they try on different outfits 他们会试穿不同的造型
[41:46] and see who’s more handsome. 看谁更帅气
[41:47] Wait, but… if Brock and Cassidy weren’t there, 可是 如果布洛克和卡西迪都不在那儿
[41:51] then who just wheeled Tyler into surgery? 那刚把泰勒推进手术室的是谁
[41:54] Why are you strapping me down? 你为什么把我绑起来
[41:56] Aren’t I gonna be under some sort of anesthesia? 不应该给我上点麻醉什么的吗
[42:02] Holy crap! 我去
[42:04] Please. I don’t… I don’t want to die. Please. 求你了 我不想死 求你了
[42:06] Please. Please, no! 求你了 不要
[42:12] Please, I-I don’t want to die. 我不想死
[42:16] Please don’t… 请不要
[42:56] Do you guys know what this means? 你们知道这意味着什么吗
[42:58] I just lost my best chance at happiness with a really hot guy? 我刚错失了和性感帅哥追求幸福的绝佳机会吗
[43:03] Definitely that. 就是这样
[43:05] Ladies… 姑娘们
[43:10] we have another serial killer on our hands. 我们又撞上一名连环杀手
尖叫女王

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尖叫女王(Scream Queens)剧集台词目录:

在线阅读
S01E01
S01E03
S01E04
S01E05
S01E06
S01E07
S01E08
S01E09
S01E10
S01E11
S01E12
S01E13

在线阅读
S02E01
S02E02
S02E03
S02E04
S02E05
S02E06
S02E07
S02E08
S02E09
S02E10

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