| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:07] | In my four years, | 在我工作的四年来 |
| [00:08] | there have been many emergencies at Sacred Heart, | 圣心医院接受过很多例急诊 |
| [00:10] | but none like this one, because today… | 但这次是史无前例的 因为今天 |
| [00:13] | Where is he? | 他在哪里 |
| [00:16] | Dr.Cox’s son needed two stitches. | Cox医生的儿子需要缝两针 |
| [00:20] | – Dr.Cox, I got here as soon… – Shut it, Newbie. | – Cox医生 我尽快赶来了 – 闭嘴吧 菜鸟 |
| [00:22] | Your blacker half is concentrating. | 别打扰你的黑人同事 |
| [00:25] | – How are you holding up? – I’m a little nervous. | – 你还行吗 – 我有点紧张 |
| [00:28] | Well, now you make me all nervous. | 你弄得我也紧张死了 |
| [00:30] | I’d focus, because that tiny patch of skin on my son’s forehead | 你给我专心点 因为在我看来我儿子额头上的 |
| [00:33] | is more important to me than the entirety | 这丁点皮要比你这个老爱击掌 剃着光头 |
| [00:36] | of your whole high-fiving, head-shaving, | 整天投空气球 唇上长痣 |
| [00:38] | air-balling, mole-lipping, insulin-needing existence, | 需要注射胰岛素的家伙重要多了 |
| [00:41] | which I guarantee you will come to an abrupt, very unnatural end. | 我保证你会迎来突然间的非正常死亡 |
| [00:47] | OK, I’m done. | 好了 我缝好了 |
| [00:48] | We all held our breath together. | 大家一起屏气 |
| [00:53] | The surgeon lives! | 这位医生不用去死了 |
| [00:58] | The Todd forgot to breathe again. | Todd忘记呼气了 |
| [01:01] | Starting CPR. | 立马开始心肺复苏 |
| [01:04] | Mr Gerst, what seems to be the problem? | Gerst先生 你哪里不舒服 |
| [01:07] | – I took some pills. – Come on, help me out here. | – 我吃了点儿药 – 吃了什么药 |
| [01:09] | Were they happy pills, sad pills, sleepy pills, | 是快乐丸 伤心丸 让你睡的药 让你醒的药 |
| [01:11] | wake up pills, sane pills, pain pills, | 让你精神正常的药 镇痛药 |
| [01:12] | – brain pills, Spain pills… – Man pills. | – 还是健脑丸 板牙根 – 伟哥 |
| [01:15] | The commercial says I should consult a physician if the condition persists | 说明书上说如果症状持续超过四小时以上 |
| [01:18] | – for more than four hours. – If what persists? | – 就要咨询医师了 – 什么症状 |
| [01:26] | Oh, let’s just say you took uppers. | 我就写你吃了兴奋剂吧 |
| [01:32] | Hey, Dude, check out what I found when I was taking out the trash! | 嘿 老兄 看我刚倒垃圾的时候发现了什么 |
| [01:36] | That is the most ridiculous hat I’ve ever seen. | 这是我见过最二的帽子了 |
| [01:38] | And I must have it. | 必须归我 |
| [01:41] | Aren’t you gonna be late to meet Carla? | 你去见Carla要迟到了吧 |
| [01:42] | I’ve got time. | 哥有的是时间 |
| [01:44] | Turk and Carla were having relationship trouble, | Turk和Carla吵架了 |
| [01:46] | so she’d been staying at Elliot’s for a few days. | 所以她这几天一直住在Elliot家 |
| [01:48] | You were late the last time. | 上次你就迟到了啊 |
| [01:49] | Yeah, but I set the clock ahead an hour last night | 是啊 但昨晚我把表拨快了1小时 |
| [01:51] | so I wouldn’t be late. | 不会迟到的 |
| [01:52] | Yeah, but last week I set it back three hours | 但上周我把表调慢了3小时 |
| [01:53] | so we could see what it felt like in Honolulu. | 好让我们体验下身处火奴鲁鲁的感觉 |
| [01:55] | Yeah, but then I set the clock ahead five hours | 但为了不让自己觉得白天看色情片太恶心 |
| [01:57] | so I wouldn’t feel like a skeeve for watching porn | 我又把时间 |
| [01:59] | in the middle of the day. | 调快了5小时 |
| [01:59] | But then I set it back forty-three minutes to 8:08, | 但我又拨回43分钟调到8点零8 |
| [02:01] | turned it upside down to see if it looked like “Bob”, | 然后倒过来看像不像Bob这个单词 |
| [02:03] | – which incidentally, it totally does – That’s true. | – 不小心发现它真的很像 – 是很像 |
| [02:05] | Which means that it’s actually… | 所以其实现在是 |
| [02:09] | – 9.52! – 9.52! | – 9点52 – 9点52 |
| [02:10] | My God, dude! I gotta be downtown in, like, eight minutes! | 天啊 我8分钟后要到达市区 |
| [02:13] | Dude, we’re never gonna make it in time! | 老兄 我们铁定要迟到了 |
| [02:16] | – Take a shortcut through that hedge! – You got it, player! | – 从树篱那抄近路过去 – 没问题 赛车手 |
| [02:20] | Hold on, buddy! | 抱紧我 兄弟 |
| [02:27] | That was a thick bush. | 真是个茂密的灌木丛 |
| [02:28] | Oh, really, Turk, was it a thick bush? | 哦 是吗 Turk 这只是个茂密的灌木丛吗 |
| [02:30] | Because there’s berries in my ass. Just go! | 老子菊花里都塞满浆果了 走吧你 |
| [02:35] | Sorry. My bad, dude. My bad. | 对不起 我的错 哥们儿 我的错 |
| [02:47] | Don’t worry, Turk, I got ’em! | 淡定 Turk 我来搞定他们 |
| [02:52] | Strike! | 牛吧我 |
| [02:56] | Turk, why are you wearing pyjamas? | Turk 你怎么穿着睡衣呢 |
| [03:00] | I really want you to come home, | 我真的想让你回家 |
| [03:01] | and on the off chance you said yes, I’d be ready to snuggle, | 而万一你真的答应我 我已经准备好抱抱了 |
| [03:04] | and that would hopefully lead to, but necessarily require, | 并希望由此实现亲密关系的本质 |
| [03:07] | relations of the intimate nature. | 但并不强求 |
| [03:10] | Turk, with everything that’s happened, | Turk 经过了这么多的事情 |
| [03:13] | I’m just having trouble trusting you. | 我真的很难再相信你了 |
| [03:15] | Baby, if there’s anyone in this world you can trust, it’s me. | 世界上唯一值得你信任的人就是我啊 |
| [03:18] | Turk, you’re the one I don’t | Turk 你是我不知道 |
| [03:20] | know if I can trust, so how am I supposed | 我能否相信的人 所以我要怎么相信自己 |
| [03:21] | to trust that I can trust you telling me that I can trust you? | 能够相信你说的我能相信你呢 |
| [03:25] | My head hurts. | 我的脑袋要炸了 |
| [03:28] | I wish I knew how it was going. | 他俩到底是要怎么样 |
| [03:31] | Sorry about your hogs, fellas. Enjoy the free espressos. | 抱歉损坏了你们的机车 伙计们 请你们喝的咖啡 |
| [03:38] | Warlord, I told you to sip it. | Warlord 叫你小口喝 |
| [03:41] | – Use your words. – Warlord burn mouth. | – 用你的嘴说话 – 嘴烫到了 |
| [03:44] | Yeah, he did, cos he wasn’t listening. | 没错 因为他不听话 |
| [03:46] | Napkin on your lap, Satan’s Valet. Thank you. | 餐巾放你腿上 撒旦的仆人 谢谢 |
| [04:07] | Hey, what are you doing, Frankenstein? | 嘿 你在干嘛 科学怪人 |
| [04:10] | Photo journal for my photography class. | 这是为我摄影课做的照片日记 |
| [04:12] | Terrific. Could I see your camera? | 真棒 能看看你的相机吗 |
| [04:15] | Very interesting. Oh, there’s film in it. | 真有趣呢 里面还有胶卷 |
| [04:19] | Hey! All my pictures were in there! | 你干嘛 我所有的照片全在里面呢 |
| [04:22] | “Dead Patient With Fancy Shirt”, | “穿高级上衣的死人” |
| [04:24] | “Dead Patient Without Fancy Shirt”, | “没穿高级上衣的死人” |
| [04:25] | “Me in Fancy Shirt Being Yelled at by Angry Family”. | “被气愤病属怒骂的穿高级上衣的我” |
| [04:27] | Do you have any idea what events would unfold | 你知道万一Jordan看到了那张照片 |
| [04:30] | if Jordan were actually to see that picture? | 会发生什么事吗 |
| [04:32] | It is a heart-wrenching | 这是Jordan远方堂弟的 |
| [04:33] | tale of woe involving Jordan’s second cousin, | 一个令人痛心的悲剧 |
| [04:36] | who plays for the New England Patriots, | 他是新英格兰爱国者队的一员 |
| [04:38] | and me having a Super Bowl ring removed from my oesophagus. | 遭殃的我被从食管里移除超级碗戒指 |
| [04:40] | No, Jordan’s never going to see these stitches. | 不行 Jordan绝对不能看到这些伤口 |
| [04:43] | Well, I hope you realise this means war. | 希望你知道这意味着我们开战了 |
| [04:45] | Yeah, buzz off, you big monkey | 一边去 你个死猴子 |
| [04:50] | Poor Mr Gerst. | 可怜的Gerst先生 |
| [04:51] | I wonder What’s that like, to have an erection for nine hours. | 我好想知道勃起9小时是什么感觉 |
| [04:54] | Ask me in 20 minutes. | 20分钟后问我 |
| [04:56] | Get this. He doesn’t have erectile dysfunction. | 听着 他又没有阳痿 |
| [04:59] | I mean, why would he take those drugs if he doesn’t need them? | 为什么还要吃伟哥呢 |
| [05:01] | What’s this? | 看 这是什么 |
| [05:02] | Why, it’s a dummy-gram, and it’s addressed to you, Barbie. | 哇 原来是一封傻瓜信件 地址是给你的 Barbie |
| [05:05] | Let’s read it and find out what’s in there. | 让我们来念念里面写了什么 |
| [05:07] | You are disturbingly naive. | 你真的很傻很天真 |
| [05:09] | Stop. Almost 50 percent | 不是吧 几乎百分之五十 |
| [05:11] | of ED drugs are taken by recreational users. | 的伟哥都是吃来助兴的 |
| [05:14] | – Stop. – That can’t be true. | – 不是吧 – 不可能 |
| [05:17] | Everyone, would you go ahead and close your eyes for a second? | 大家可以闭上眼睛一会儿吗 |
| [05:20] | Great. Now, would all the | 很好 现在请在座 |
| [05:22] | men in the room who have tried Mr Happy pills | 所有吃过伟哥的男同志 |
| [05:24] | go ahead and grab your fork and bang your glass. | 拿起叉子敲敲你的杯子 |
| [05:31] | Thank you. | 谢谢大家 |
| [05:35] | Ted, everyone stopped! | Ted 大家已经停了 |
| [05:39] | Oh, damn it! | 妈了个蛋 |
| [05:42] | Dude, She’s got this whole trust issue with me. | 老兄 她对我的信任感有问题 |
| [05:44] | Just tell her she can trust you. | 告诉她你是可以信任的 |
| [05:45] | I did. | 我说了 |
| [05:46] | But apparently if I’m the one she didn’t know she could trust, | 但很明显如果她不知道能不能相信我 |
| [05:48] | how’s she supposed to trust | 她怎么会相信 |
| [05:49] | she can trust me telling her she can trust me? | 她能相信我说的她能相信我 |
| [05:51] | – My head hurts. – Yeah, Mine did too. | – 我脑袋炸了 – 我的也是 |
| [05:52] | – That’s why I need you to go in. – No way, dude. | – 所以我需要你帮忙劝说 – 没门儿 老兄 |
| [05:54] | It’s never smart to get in the middle of someone else’s relationship. | 插手别人的感情永远不是明智之举 |
| [05:57] | I’ll let you wear my top hat. | 我让你戴我的高顶礼帽 |
| [05:59] | Hey! Want to grab a beer? | 嗨 想去喝啤酒吗 |
| [06:02] | Lose the hat. | 把帽子脱了 |
| [06:06] | – Hi. – Hello, there. | – 嗨 – 你好啊 |
| [06:08] | What’s with all the Band-Aids? | 这些创口贴是怎么回事 |
| [06:10] | Jack was getting nutty, having some fun. | Jack只是在小淘气闹着玩啦 |
| [06:12] | See, I even let him put one on me. | 看 他还给我贴了一个 |
| [06:15] | – Really? – Yeah. | – 真的吗 – 是啊 |
| [06:19] | – Are those stitches? – What are the odds you’d pick that one? | – 这是缝的针吗 – 你怎么偏偏就选了这一处撕开 |
| [06:22] | Jack just… He just fell off of the jungle gym. | Jack只是从攀登架上摔了下来 |
| [06:25] | You’re not careful enough with him! | 你对他不够上心 |
| [06:26] | What about the time you had him | 你怎么不说你带他 |
| [06:27] | and he brained himself on the coffee table? | 然后他脑袋撞到咖啡桌那一次 |
| [06:29] | – That was an accident. – Just a quick question. | – 那次是意外 – 一个小问题 |
| [06:31] | Why is it an accident when he’s with you, | 为什么Jack和你在一起 发生的就是意外 |
| [06:33] | but when Jack gets hurt on my time. | 而和我在一起受了伤 |
| [06:35] | It’s because I’m not careful enough? | 就是因为我不够小心 |
| [06:36] | Because I… | 因为我 |
| [06:40] | Oh, dear God. | 我的天啊 |
| [06:42] | You’re speechless. | 你无语了 |
| [06:44] | I won! I won an argument. Jack, it’s unprecedented. | 我赢了 这次争论我赢了 Jack 这可是史无前例哦 |
| [06:48] | We’ll be at the playground drinking beer. Oh, God, we love beer! | 我们要去操场喝啤酒 我们爱死啤酒了 |
| [06:52] | But… | 但是 |
| [06:57] | That guy needs to do some serious thinking about baseball. | 这哥们得好好考虑要不要打棒球了 |
| [07:00] | – He wouldn’t even let me see it. – Hey meathead! | – 他都不让我给他检查 – 嗨 笨蛋 |
| [07:03] | Oh good, you both looked. | 哈哈 你俩居然都应了 |
| [07:04] | Now, Mr Gerst came here for help, and we’re doctors, | 听着 Gerst先生来寻求帮助 而我们身为医生 |
| [07:07] | so how about we try and | 我们能不能试着 |
| [07:08] | treat him with a bit of dignity and respect, okay? | 尊重一下人家 |
| [07:12] | That man is a human sundial. | 那男的简直就是人体日晷 |
| [07:20] | Oh, it’s so nice to get out. | 能出来玩真的太爽了 |
| [07:24] | Oh, hey, do you know who sings this song? | 你知道这首歌是谁唱的吗 |
| [07:25] | No, but I can tell you who doesn’t sing it. Billy Joel, | 不知道 但我可以告诉你不是谁唱的 Billy Joel |
| [07:28] | who brought us hits as Uptown Girl and Matter of Trust. | 他曾唱过轰动一时的<窈窕淑女>和<信任危机> |
| [07:31] | And speaking of trust, you know who’s trustworthy? Turk. | 说到信任 你知道谁值得信任吗 Turk |
| [07:34] | I call him Turkey-Turkey-Turkey- | 我平时都叫他 伙计 伙计 伙计 |
| [07:35] | Turkey-Trust-Trust. A little nickname. | 伙计 信任 信任 这是一个小昵称 |
| [07:38] | J.D., I know what you’re trying to do and it’s very sweet, | J.D 我知道你在干嘛 我理解你的好意 |
| [07:41] | but the last couple of days have been so messed up and confusing, | 但最近几天真的太糟糕了 |
| [07:45] | I’d love to just try and | 我就想 |
| [07:46] | forget about it and have a few drinks, OK? | 忘记这些烦恼 喝几杯 行吗 |
| [07:48] | But I told Turk I’d talk about him constantly | 但我答应Turk要一直美言他 |
| [07:49] | until you made me leave. | 直到你叫我滚蛋 |
| [07:50] | I’ll let you put the hat back on. | 我允许你把帽子戴回去 |
| [07:52] | Two appletinis, governor. | 州长 来两杯苹果马提尼 |
| [07:57] | Look at my girl. Right back up on the monkey bars, | 看我女儿 又爬到攀吊架上了 |
| [08:00] | after she chipped her tooth there last week. | 她上周才在那儿磕崩了一颗牙 |
| [08:02] | That’s nothing. My kid’s got a forehead full | 这算什么 我儿子从攀登架跳下来了 |
| [08:04] | of stitches from leaping off the jungle gym. | 弄得整个额头都缝了针 |
| [08:06] | When my wife’s not around, I let her stand on my shoulders. | 我老婆不在时 我都让我女儿站在我肩膀上 |
| [08:09] | Really? Wait till you get a load of this. | 是吗 那你等会看着 |
| [08:12] | Okay, here we go. What a– | 好了好了 |
| [08:14] | Come here you. You come here, you. | 来爸爸抱抱 |
| [08:18] | Giant man, why are you making that noise? | 巨人 你为什么要发出这种怪声 |
| [08:21] | Oh, well, because my camera doesn’t make a real sound, | 因为我的相机不能发出声音 |
| [08:23] | and it’s more fun that way. See? You go… | 而且这样更有意思 你看 |
| [08:28] | Look happy. Look sad. | 开心的表情 难过的表情 |
| [08:32] | Look crazy. | 发疯的表情 |
| [08:34] | Look like you’re going away. | 一个你要走了的表情 |
| [08:40] | You’re coming in because you need to | 你来是要给大家 |
| [08:41] | set an example of professionalism. | 做一个专业榜样的 |
| [08:43] | You’re not gonna do that by making fun of that man’s slinky-doo. | 通过嘲笑那男人线条毕现的小鸡鸡可不行 |
| [08:45] | Don’t pull me! I’m your boss, for God’s… Hello! | 别拉拉扯扯的 我是你上司 你好呀 |
| [08:50] | Well, Mr Gerst, your situation | Gerst先生 你那里 |
| [08:53] | doesn’t seem to be reversing itself, | 好像还没有自行消退 |
| [08:54] | so I think we’re gonna need to schedule | 所以我想我们需要给你安排 |
| [08:55] | a procedure to relieve the… | 个手术来释放你的 |
| [09:00] | Woodiness. | 男人雄风 |
| [09:02] | My fiancee’s only twenty-four and she said | 我未婚妻今年才24岁 |
| [09:04] | she wanted to do something special this morning. | 今早她说想做点特别的事情 |
| [09:06] | Turns out she just meant having breakfast with her family. | 原来她只是想和她家人吃早餐而已 |
| [09:09] | Those pills didn’t really kick in until just about the moment | 等到我被介绍给她90岁的祖母时 |
| [09:12] | I’m introduced to her 90-year-old grandmother. | 这些伟哥才开始起作用 |
| [09:15] | And sure enough, | 当然了 接下来 |
| [09:16] | that little lady gives me the waist hug from her wheelchair. | 这位小妇人坐在轮椅上伸出双臂来抱我 |
| [09:20] | Excuse me, I need that chart. | 抱歉 我要拿下表格 |
| [09:21] | Sweetheart, it’s not healthy to hold it in. Just let it out. | 亲爱的 想笑就笑吧 憋着不好 |
| [09:24] | – You know you want to. – I’m fine. | – 我知道你想笑 – 我不想 |
| [09:27] | I pulled away from that | 结果我离身时 |
| [09:28] | encounter with all of Grandma Helen’s breathing apparatus. | 还扯走了Helen祖母身上的呼吸器 |
| [09:34] | My work here is done. | 我的任务完成了 |
| [09:37] | Oh, my God, I can’t stop! I’m sorry. I have to pee. | 我的天啊 我停不下来了 抱歉 我要尿了 |
| [09:44] | OK, J.D., why are we sitting up here? | J.D. 我们干嘛要坐在这上面 |
| [09:47] | Because you can see Elliot’s whole apartment from up here. | 因为从这里你能看见Elliot的整个公寓 |
| [09:51] | J.D., you’re drunk. | J.D. 你醉了 |
| [09:52] | Carla, I’m not as think as you drunk I am. I mean… | Carla 我没有你”喝醉”得那么”想象” 我是说 |
| [09:59] | Then why can’t you let go of the couch? | 那为什么你不能放开沙发 |
| [10:01] | I can let go of the couch if I so choose. | 我想放随时都能放 |
| [10:03] | OK, let go of the couch. Let it go. | 好啊 那你放吧 快放 |
| [10:08] | You see? | 看见了吗 |
| [10:16] | There are many things we can’t control, | 无论我们有多强大 |
| [10:17] | no matter how strong we might be… | 有许多事是我们无法控制的 |
| [10:21] | … like a knee-jerk reaction… | 就像膝跳反应 |
| [10:23] | I am so sorry. | 我真的太抱歉了 |
| [10:27] | I’m done. I’m done. Yes. | 我不笑了 我不笑了 |
| [10:30] | It’s OK. | 没关系 |
| [10:36] | … or a janitor who has it in for you. | 或是给你送来”好消息”的门卫 |
| [10:39] | Hi. Look what someone was nice enough to give me. | 嗨 看看谁那么好心给我的东西 |
| [10:46] | Janitor. | 死门卫 |
| [10:52] | Oh, thank you for helping me have some fun tonight. | 谢谢你今晚给我带来的快乐 |
| [10:56] | You’re welcome. | 不客气 |
| [10:58] | And sometimes you let go of the | 有时你却因为一时的软弱 |
| [10:59] | control you do have in a brief moment of weakness. | 而放弃了你的自制力 |
| [11:07] | Sorry. Drunken accident. | 对不起 酒醉的意外 |
| [11:10] | – Nothing happened. – Right. | – 什么都没发生 – 是的 |
| [11:11] | – Good night. – Good night. | – 晚安 – 晚安 |
| [11:13] | – Good night. – Good night. | – 晚安 – 晚安 |
| [11:14] | – Buenas… nose things. – Good night. | – 晚安 – 晚安 |
| [11:20] | Like she said, everything’s fine. | 就像她说的 什么事都没发生 |
| [11:28] | There’s nothing like the rays of the morning sun kissing you awake | 没什么像晨光一样会把你吻醒 |
| [11:31] | and gently reminding you that you got | 温柔地提醒你 |
| [11:33] | drunk and kissed your best friend’s wife. | 你喝醉了 并且吻了你最好朋友的妻子 |
| [11:35] | – Oh, my God! – Oh, my God! | – 我了个去 – 我的天啊 |
| [11:38] | – So it really happened? – Yeah, but it was nothing! | – 真的发生了吗 – 是啊 但什么都没有 |
| [11:40] | Nothing! | 没有 |
| [11:40] | No! There wasn’t even any tongue! – No tongue! | 连舌吻都没有 – 你还想舌吻 |
| [11:42] | – It was just a friend kiss! – Were your lips parted at all? | – 那只是朋友的一个吻 – 你嘴唇张开了吗 |
| [11:44] | No, I pursed them like this. | 没 我一直这么撅着 |
| [11:46] | I don’t know, J.D. | 我不确定 J.D. |
| [11:47] | I remember my one lip being on top of your upper lip | 我记得我的一片嘴唇在你的上嘴唇上面 |
| [11:49] | and my other lip being somewhere in the middle of yours, | 我的另外一片嘴唇在你的双唇之间 |
| [11:50] | which means your lips were apart | 所以说你的嘴唇张开了 |
| [11:52] | and I don’t think that’s a friend kiss. | 根本不是什么朋友的吻 |
| [11:54] | Yes it is! It’s a friend kiss, | 是的 就是朋友的吻 |
| [11:55] | and we will never talk about this to anyone ever! | 我们永远不准跟任何人提起这事 |
| [11:57] | – All right. – What’s going on? | – 好吧 – 怎么了 |
| [11:59] | – Nothing. – J.D. and I kissed. | – 没什么 – J.D.和我接吻了 |
| [12:00] | – Carla! – You kissed? Like a friend kiss? | – Carla – 你们接吻了 朋友间的接吻吗 |
| [12:02] | – Yes. – No! | – 是的 – 不是 |
| [12:03] | Carla! You’re killing me! | Carla 你让不让我活了 |
| [12:08] | – This never leaves the room! – Why did you close my window? | – 这事决不能传出这房间 – 你干嘛把我的窗户关了 |
| [12:15] | Oh no, she wrote “J.D. | 哦 不 它在纸上写了 |
| [12:16] | And Carla kissed”on the paper and she’s gonna tell Turk! | “J.D.和Carla接吻了” 它要告诉Turk |
| [12:19] | No, no, stop her! | 不要啊 拦住它 |
| [12:21] | Don’t worry, ladies, I’ve closed the window. | 别担心 女士们 我已经把窗户关上了 |
| [12:29] | J.D., I don’t have a messenger monkey. | J.D. 我可没有送信小猴子 |
| [12:34] | All right, fine, | 好吧 我承认 |
| [12:35] | I’m a little rougher than you are, but guess what? | 我是比你粗心一点 可你知道吗 |
| [12:38] | The two of us have two distinctly different parenting styles. | 我俩为人父母的风格完全不一样 |
| [12:41] | You’re an overbearing hypo-cautious psychotic, | 你是个专横 高度谨慎的精神病人 |
| [12:43] | and I’m, well, you know… fun. | 而我呢 则是个逗比 |
| [12:47] | And I think if we can meet somewhere in the middle, | 如果我俩能相互中和一下 |
| [12:49] | I think Jack’s gonna be terrific. | Jack一定会变得很棒 |
| [12:51] | Besides, it’s not like I ever put him in any real danger. | 再说 我又没有将他置于任何真正危险的境地 |
| [12:55] | Flip! | 翻翻翻 |
| [12:57] | Flip? What does “Flip” Mean, Perry? | 翻什么 什么意思 Perry |
| [12:59] | Jack probably thinks that | 可能是Jack觉得 |
| [13:00] | Mommy and Daddy are being a little too sarcastic with each other. | 我俩太会翻来覆去地挖苦对方了吧 |
| [13:04] | Maybe. | 也许吧 |
| [13:05] | Or it’s because every time he says “Flip”, | 又或是因为每次Jack说”翻”的时候 |
| [13:08] | Daddy does a little trick where he grabs Jack by the ankles, | 爸爸就会抓住他的脚踝 |
| [13:11] | he flips him upside down, | 让他颠倒翻转 |
| [13:12] | he drops him down onto his shoulders and then… | 他把Jack放到肩膀上 然后 |
| [13:15] | …puts him in a little baby trapeze, | 把他放进小秋千里 |
| [13:17] | shoots him across the sand box without a net. | 直接将他射入没有网篮的沙盒里 |
| [13:21] | You are never taking Jack to the park without me. Ever! | 没有我你别想带Jack去公园 永远别想 |
| [13:24] | Jordan Jordan. | |
| [13:28] | – A trapeze? – Yeah. Photoshop. You can do anything. | – 秋千 – PS嘛 想P什么都行 |
| [13:32] | Here I have you wearing a duck’s bill. Get it? | 这是你装了鸭嘴的照片 明白吗 |
| [13:35] | Because you’re a quack. | 因为你呱呱叫啊 |
| [13:38] | No?! | 不好笑吗 |
| [13:40] | Come on. Classic comedy, my friend. | 这可是经典喜剧哦 朋友 |
| [13:42] | He’ll learn. | 他会明白的 |
| [13:44] | I’m such a horrible person. I mean, there I was, | 我真的好可恶 我是说当时自己一副 |
| [13:47] | up on my high horse about Mr Gerst, | 道貌岸然的样子关心Gerst先生 |
| [13:48] | and then I just turned out to be just as bad as everyone else. | 结果我原来和其他人一样坏 |
| [13:50] | Sweetheart, give yourself some credit. | 亲爱的 别谦虚 |
| [13:51] | You were much worse than everyone else. | 你比别人坏多了 |
| [13:54] | Maybe I was, but you know what? I’m gonna try and better myself. | 也许以前是 但我会改过的 |
| [13:57] | And unlike you, I’m gonna follow through, | 不像你 我会坚持到底的 |
| [13:58] | Mr. “Sign up on the Hospital Bulletin Board | “在医院公布栏上的私人德语课程报了名 |
| [14:00] | for Private German Lessons and then Never Show Up”! | 却连个面都没露”先生 |
| [14:02] | Yeah, that’s right. | 是啊 没错 |
| [14:03] | It was my flier! | 那是我发的宣传单 |
| [14:06] | I broke up with my German mistress. She smells like sauerkraut. | 我跟我的德国情妇掰了 她浑身一股德国泡菜味 |
| [14:10] | I’m so sorry. | 我很遗憾 |
| [14:12] | Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go into that room right now | 恕我失陪 我现在要走进那房间 |
| [14:15] | and own up to what I did. | 坦白承认我的错误 |
| [14:20] | Hello? Did someone come in? | 是谁 有人进来了吗 |
| [14:27] | I had to hide from Turk, | 为了躲Turk |
| [14:28] | so I went to the one place that I knew no one would ever venture. | 我去了一个谁都不会去的地方 |
| [14:31] | Ted Ted Ted? Ted? | |
| [14:34] | – A little help! – Ted, what are you doing? | – 救我 – Ted 你在干嘛呢 |
| [14:36] | I like to do stomach crunches after lunch. | 我习惯午饭后做仰卧起坐 |
| [14:40] | Ted, lunch was four hours ago. | Ted 午饭是四个小时之前吃的了 |
| [14:41] | – Yep, I wasted most of my Tuesday. – It’s Wednesday. | – 是 我整个周二都浪费了 – 今天是周三 |
| [14:45] | Oh, man, I missed the Gilmore Girls! | 天 我忘记看<吉尔莫女孩>了 |
| [14:51] | – There you are. Hey, Ted. – Hey. | – 你在这儿啊 嗨 Ted – 嗨 |
| [14:53] | – So how did it go last night? – Whoa! What’s with the fifth degree? | – 昨晚怎么样 – 哇 你这五级严刑逼供的口吻是怎样 |
| [14:56] | Don’t you mean third degree? | 你是说三级吧 |
| [14:58] | No, because this is two degrees worse. | 不 因为这比三级还严重两级 |
| [14:59] | I can’t breathe. it’s like you’re all over me. | 你逼得我整个人都呼吸困难了 |
| [15:00] | I’m trapped in a death coffin. | 像被困在棺材里 |
| [15:02] | Calm down, I just want to see if you got anywhere with Carla. | 淡定 我只是想知道你和Carla谈得怎么样了 |
| [15:04] | Alright, he knows your lying face, | 好吧 你要说谎他一眼就能看穿 |
| [15:05] | but silence is incriminating too. So think! | 但沉默也不是金啊 快想啊 |
| [15:07] | What’s between silence and talking? | 沉默与说话之间是什么 |
| [15:12] | Turk? I thought you could take me over to Elliot’s place | Turk 你能载我去Elliot家吗 |
| [15:15] | to get my stuff so I could move back in. | 我想去拿我的东西 然后搬回去 |
| [15:17] | Yeah, sure… Really? | 可以啊 你说真的吗 |
| [15:21] | – Alright, but meet me downstairs, okay? – Okay. | – 好 楼下见 – 好的 |
| [15:24] | I owe you one. | 我欠你一个人情 |
| [15:28] | Ted, you should probably sit down. You’re looking a little purple. | Ted 坐下吧 你脸都发紫了 |
| [15:30] | I know my own body. | 我了解自己的身体 |
| [15:37] | – Thanks for saving my ass. – Well, I wasn’t saving your ass. | – 谢谢你帮我打圆场 – 我不是在帮你 |
| [15:41] | I didn’t realize how easy it is to make little mistakes. | 我不知道原来犯小错是那么简单 |
| [15:44] | They’re stupid little mistakes that seem like nothing, | 这些愚蠢的小错误也许看起来微不足道 |
| [15:46] | but can snowball on you and | 但却会像滚雪球一样 |
| [15:48] | take your whole marriage with it, you know? | 把你整个婚姻都毁掉 |
| [15:51] | I feel like I really understand now | 我现在才真正理解 |
| [15:53] | how Turk could have let stuff like that happen, you know. | Turk怎么就任由这样的事发生了 |
| [15:57] | So I forgave him. | 所以我选择原谅他 |
| [15:59] | – Well, I guess I’m glad we kissed then. – Me too. | – 不过很开心我们接吻了 – 我也是呢 |
| [16:04] | – You guys ready? – Yeah, we are. Let’s do it. | – 你们准备好了吗 – 是的 出发吧 |
| [16:15] | OK, we just saw the plastic surgeon. | 我带Jack看过整形外科医生了 |
| [16:18] | Jack is fine, but if the cut | 他没什么事 |
| [16:20] | was four inches to the left and 7 inches deeper, | 但如果伤口再往左四英寸 再深七英寸 |
| [16:23] | it could have potentially scratched his eye. | 真的可能会划到他的眼睛 |
| [16:25] | – That was a close one. – What a sweet little angel. | – 好险 – 好可爱的小天使呀 |
| [16:29] | Can I just give him a little squeeze? | 我能抱抱他吗 |
| [16:32] | Of course. | 当然 |
| [16:33] | Back off there, lady. | 就此打住 女士 |
| [16:35] | How’s about you save up all that energy for the cruise? | 省点力气 还得巡游呢 |
| [16:37] | Go on, get out of here. | 去吧 快走 |
| [16:38] | Hippity-hop to the barber shop. Come on, Mom. | 麻利儿去理发店吧 老妈 |
| [16:41] | Jordon, this hospital is literally crawling with germs and disease. | Jordon 这医院全是细菌和疾病 |
| [16:44] | And in all fairness, you don’t know if that lady is a sickie, | 平心而论 你怎么知道那女的是不是疯子 |
| [16:47] | visiting a sickie | 来这儿探望另一个疯子 |
| [16:49] | and she ran her sickie hands all over his sickie face. | 还让她用疯子的手摸他的脸蛋 |
| [16:50] | – I normally never let people touch him. – Oh, really? | – 我一般不会让人碰他的 – 真的吗 |
| [16:54] | Because these photographs would beg to differ. | 这些照片可不这么认为哦 |
| [16:56] | Old lady kissing Jack, teenage girl hugging Jack, | 老太婆亲Jack 小女生抱Jack |
| [17:01] | homeless man… holding Jack. | 流浪汉 抱着Jack |
| [17:05] | – Jordan! – It’s just Carl. | – Jordan – 只是Carl而已 |
| [17:07] | He holds Jack when I get a bikini wax. | 我在除毛的时候让他抱着Jack而已 |
| [17:10] | What’s the matter with me? | 我到底是怎么了 |
| [17:11] | I mean, I don’t think twice about people holding him, | 我平时想都不想就让别人抱他 |
| [17:13] | and yet I’m obsessed about things | 现在我却着了魔地担心他 |
| [17:15] | like broken arms, broken legs, choking, | 断了手 断了脚 窒息 |
| [17:17] | kidnapping, drowning, silly putty, | 被绑架 溺水 乱玩橡皮泥 |
| [17:19] | bad babysitters, pretty babysitters. | 被保姆欺负 被保姆勾引 |
| [17:20] | Yeah, I pretty much freak out over staph infections, | 是啊 我担心他感染葡糖球菌 |
| [17:22] | blood disease, | 怕他染上血液疾病 |
| [17:23] | mumps, measles, sex, drugs, rock and roll | 怕他染上腮腺炎 麻疹 嫖娼 吸毒 摇滚乐 |
| [17:25] | and definitely all registered independents. | 还有所有的独立法人 |
| [17:27] | So I think between us we’ve got it covered. | 所以我俩把所有的可能都说了 |
| [17:29] | – Was this taken at my mother’s house? – I gotta go. | – 这是在我妈妈家拍的吗 – 我先走一步 |
| [17:35] | Dude, that did not happen. | 老兄 根本没那事 |
| [17:37] | No, I’m in the hospital because I… They think I have avian flu. | 不 我在医院 我可能感染上禽流感了 |
| [17:42] | I gotta call you back. How long have you been there? | 我晚点打给你 你在这儿多久了 |
| [17:45] | Oh, 47, 48 minutes. I’m not sure. I nodded off for a while. | 47 48分钟吧 不确定 我打了一会儿盹 |
| [17:51] | Mr Gerst, I’m so sorry for laughing at you. | Gerst先生 很抱歉我嘲笑了你 |
| [17:54] | But I have to tell a story. When I was in the seventh grade, | 但我得给你讲个故事 当我上七年级时 |
| [17:57] | I was at a roller rink and I needed to go to the bathroom. | 有一次我在旱冰场 我突然想上厕所 |
| [17:59] | So I just skated right on | 我直接滑进了洗手间 |
| [18:00] | into a stall and I did my private business. | 里的一个小隔间 然后一泄如注 |
| [18:03] | And then when I went to pull up my pants, | 当我要提裤子时 |
| [18:05] | I started rolling towards the door, | 我突然滑向门那儿 |
| [18:06] | which, as it turned out, it wasn’t latched. | 而且门还没锁 |
| [18:08] | I don’t know if you’ve had | 不知道你有没有试过 |
| [18:08] | experience skating with underpants around your ankles. | 内裤掉到脚踝上还滑着旱冰 |
| [18:11] | it’s very difficult to stop. | 真的根本停不下来 |
| [18:12] | Unless of course, you know, you scream so loud that | 直到我尖叫得太大声 |
| [18:14] | they turn off the music and everyone is looking at you. | 大家把音乐关掉 齐刷刷看向我 |
| [18:17] | Anyway, that’s how I wound up with the nickname Roller Moler. | 这就是为什么大家叫我轮滑小痣 |
| [18:20] | – I’m sorry? – I have a mole on my ass. | – 为什么 – 因为我屁股上有颗痣 |
| [18:23] | The cute kind, not the hairy kind. | 可爱的那种 没长毛 |
| [18:26] | Anyway, the next day I showed up at school with roller skates on, | 第二天我滑着旱冰去上学 |
| [18:28] | – and everybody cracked up. – Why are you telling me this? | – 大家都笑喷了 – 你干嘛要跟我说这些 |
| [18:32] | Because I owned up to it. This is funny, Mr Gerst. | 因为我想向你坦白 不好笑吗 Gerst先生 |
| [18:35] | And if you don’t just embrace it and become part of the joke | 如果你不能欣然接受这些笑话 学会自嘲 |
| [18:37] | it will follow you around and devour you. | 你就会被慢慢吞噬掉 |
| [18:40] | – Can I get a look at that mole? – No. No. | – 我能看看那颗痔吗 – 不 不行 |
| [18:46] | This is nice, the three of | 这样真好 我们三个 |
| [18:47] | us sitting together again like three musketeers. | 又坐在一起了 就像三个火枪手 |
| [18:50] | Yeah. And I need you guys to scrape your plates | 是啊 我需要你们把碗碟 |
| [18:53] | before you put them in the dishwasher. | 放进洗碗机前把它们刮干净 |
| [18:56] | She’s back. My baby’s back! | 这才对嘛 我的宝贝儿回来啦 |
| [19:01] | Carla was right. If a relationship’s gonna work, | Carla说得对 只有建立在互相信任上 |
| [19:04] | it has to be based on trust, | 感情才能历久弥坚 |
| [19:05] | like a wife trusting her husband again. | 比如妻子重新信任她的丈夫 |
| [19:08] | – Kid’s back on the jungle gym. – Sure. | – 你小孩又去爬攀登架了 – 是呀 |
| [19:10] | – Guess your wife backed down. – You bet your sweet ass she did. | – 看来你妻子妥协了 – 那是当然 |
| [19:13] | Even if it involves a compromise. | 即便要让步 |
| [19:17] | Hey, Jack! Just blink when you want me to get you down. | Jack 如果想让我帮你下来 就眨眨眼 |
| [19:20] | Just give me the old blink-a-roonie. Terrific athlete. | 给我个王者的眼神 你看他多有天赋 |
| [19:23] | I’m thinking 2016 Olympics. | 我在考虑让他参加2016年奥林匹克 |
| [19:25] | Oh, God, was that a blink? Excuse me. | 他那是在眨眼吗 让一下 |
| [19:30] | Or a patient trusting his | 又或是病人信任 |
| [19:32] | doctor to help him hold on to his dignity. | 他的医生会帮他维护尊严 |
| [19:34] | Yes, and then I pulled off Grandma’s breathing apparatus. | 是啊 然后我拉掉了奶奶的呼吸器 |
| [19:37] | No, I’m serious. | 不 我是说真的 |
| [19:40] | It may take a lot of work, but it’s worth it. | 虽然道路曲折 但前途光明 |
| [19:45] | Wow, that was a moist kiss. Wish I was wearing an apron. | 好一个湿吻 我要是穿着围裙就好了 |
| [19:48] | Baby, from here on out, I hide nothing from you. | 亲爱的 从今往后 我对你无所隐瞒 |
| [19:52] | It’s a clean start for us. | 让我们重新开始吧 |
| [19:55] | Sports time! | 看比赛喽 |
| [19:57] | Because in the end, things work out for the best. | 因为最终一切事情都会好起来的 |
| [20:01] | J.D. And I kissed. | J.D和我接吻了 |
| [20:08] | Or not. | 我话说早了 |