| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:05] | Behold Julie Quinn. | 瞧 这是Julie Quinn |
| [00:08] | Ahhh! | 啊 |
| [00:10] | We fell for each other so swiftly, | 我们迅速的坠入爱河 |
| [00:12] | we decided to buy some property together. | 于是决定一起购置点地产 |
| [00:15] | And build a deck on it. | 一起盖个房子 |
| [00:18] | To our half acre. | 敬我们的半英亩 |
| [00:20] | Hey, look, the Clarks are home. | 嘿 看哪 Clark家回来了 |
| [00:22] | Unfortunately, the Clarks felt if we weren’t building a house, | 不幸的是 Clark家认为如果我们不真的盖个房子 |
| [00:26] | we weren’t technically their neighbors. | 就不能真正算是他们的邻居 |
| [00:28] | – Hey, Clarks! – Go to hell! | – 嘿 Clarks – 去死吧 |
| [00:31] | OK. Hey, Buzz! I’m gonna beat you in poker next time. | 好吧 嘿 Buzz 下次打牌我肯定赢你哦 |
| [00:35] | The Morgans, on the other side, were friendlier, | 相反的是 Morgan一家友善的多 |
| [00:39] | but I don’t think we’re gonna have them over again. | 但是我估计我们不会再请他们来作客了 |
| [00:42] | – Hi. – Y’all are a cute couple. | – 嘿 – 你们真是可爱的一对儿 |
| [00:44] | – Thanks. – You want to buy a baby? | – 谢谢 – 你们想买个宝宝不 |
| [00:46] | – Oh, sweetie? – No. | – 噢 甜心 – 不要 |
| [00:48] | – I’m sorry. No, thank you. – I’ll throw in a crib. | – 不好意思 不用了 谢谢 – 我可以加送个摇篮 |
| [00:50] | Throwing in a crib. | 加送摇篮啊 |
| [00:53] | It didn’t matter, | 不过没关系 |
| [00:54] | because I was happy to look out at my beautiful half acre | 因为我很开心 和我笨手笨脚的小甜心一起 |
| [00:57] | with my sweet but klutzy gal. | 看着我们美丽的半英亩 |
| [01:00] | You OK, buttercup? | 你还好吗 甜心 |
| [01:02] | The glass broke in my mouth. | 玻璃杯碎在我嘴里了 |
| [01:08] | Turk and I had discovered | Turk和我发现了一种对付 |
| [01:09] | a new way to deal with Kelso’s bad moods. | Kelso坏心情的方法 |
| [01:12] | Damn it, people. | 该死的 各位 |
| [01:13] | If you can’t fill out your patients’ insurance forms, then… | 如果你们不能好好的填写你们病人的保险单 那就 |
| [01:16] | Spoonful of peanut butter, sir? | 来勺花生酱吧 先生 |
| [01:19] | It usually bought us a few minutes of peace, | 这一般都会给我们带来几分钟的宁静 |
| [01:22] | but then Carla said something | 但不一会儿 Carla说了一件 |
| [01:24] | that deeply disturbs every man on God’s Earth. | 让地球上所有男人都不舒服的事 |
| [01:26] | I just got my period. | 我刚刚来例假了 |
| [01:28] | Oh! | 噢 |
| [01:29] | This really sucks. I’ve been trying to get pregnant for two months now. | 烦死了 我已经努力受孕两个月了 |
| [01:32] | – I almost bought a baby yesterday. – What? | – 我昨天差点买了个宝宝 – 什么 |
| [01:35] | Don’t tell them, in case you want it later. | 别说出去啊 万一以后你又想买了呢 |
| [01:38] | Nothing. | 没事 |
| [01:40] | Don’t worry about it,baby. We’ll keep trying. | 别担心 宝贝 我们继续努力 |
| [01:42] | Remember in a magazine I read | 记得我在杂志上读过的 |
| [01:43] | how important it is for the man to have a high-protein diet? | 关于高蛋白饮食对于男人的重要性的文章吗 |
| [01:46] | Turk, for the last time, you are not eating ribs while we do it. | Turk 最后一次告诉你 别想在做爱的时候啃排骨 |
| [01:49] | You don’t let me have no fun! | 你就是不让我找乐子 |
| [01:53] | You know I’m not gonna have a kid | 我可不打算要孩子 |
| [01:54] | until that genetic technology they’re talking about | 除非是到了每个人都可以 |
| [01:56] | is available for everyone. | 自由使用基因技术的那一天 |
| [01:57] | So you want to pick the sex and eye color? | 你是想自己挑选孩子的性别和眼睛颜色吗 |
| [01:59] | No. Gills. When that day comes, | 不是 要鳃 等那天到来 |
| [02:02] | goodbye hospital, hello father-son treasure hunting team. | 再见了医院 父子寻宝队出发啦 |
| [02:05] | Wow. Well, you better get cracking. What are you, like, 45? | 好吧 那你得赶紧准备开始了 你都多大了 45岁 |
| [02:09] | Forty-three. I know I look little older, | 43好不好 我知道我看起来有点老相 |
| [02:12] | but that’s ’cause I drink and smoke, | 那是因为我抽烟喝酒 |
| [02:14] | work with chemicals, sleep on my face. | 工作还接触化学物品 趴着睡觉 |
| [02:16] | – No hard feelings? OK. – All right. | – 别在意 好吗 – 好吧 |
| [02:20] | I swear on my unborn fish-boy’s life, she will pay. | 以我未出生的鱼儿子发誓 她会付出代价的 |
| [02:27] | I need some milk. | 我想喝牛奶 |
| [02:31] | – Yo, Glassman. – What’s “Glassman”? | – 嘿 玻璃人 – “玻璃人”什么意思 |
| [02:34] | It’s a basketball thing. I’m a great rebounder. | 跟篮球有关 我很擅长篮板球 |
| [02:37] | You know who else is a great rebounder? Dr. Mickhead. | 你知道还有谁擅长篮板球吗 Mickhead医生 |
| [02:40] | His wife was killed last Saturday. | 上星期六他的妻子被杀了 |
| [02:43] | Hey, guys. | 嘿 伙计们 |
| [02:44] | Hey, Mickhead! | 嘿 Mickhead |
| [02:46] | – Have the police cleared him yet? | – 警察已经排除了他的嫌疑吗 |
| [02:48] | – He’s still a person of interest. | – 他还是被怀疑对象呢 |
| [02:50] | There was sexual energy everywhere. | 到处都在春情泛滥 |
| [02:53] | For the women, it was due | 女人们都被新来的 |
| [02:55] | to the dashing new gynecologist, Dr. Matthews. | 英俊潇洒的妇科医生 Matthews医生所吸引 |
| [03:00] | Jordan, why would you need seven Pap smears in one month? | Jordan 为什么你一个月要做七次子宫抹片检查 |
| [03:03] | I got a lot of Pap. Move your head so I can see. | 我的分泌物很多 挪开你的脑袋 我都看不见了 |
| [03:08] | And for the men, | 对于男人们来说 |
| [03:10] | there was a new, sexy Latina nurse: | 新来的性感拉丁护士是他们追随的对象 |
| [03:12] | Nurse Martinez. | Martinez护士 |
| [03:16] | Will you guys stop doing that? | 你们能不能别再这样了 |
| [03:18] | Yep. There was eye candy for all, | 是啊 所有人都能过过眼瘾 |
| [03:20] | and only one thing could upset this delicate balance. | 只有一件事会打破这种微妙的平衡 |
| [03:24] | Wow. She looks like a young Carla. | 哇 她看起来像是年轻版的Carla |
| [03:55] | That’s why they call him the Glassman. | 怪不得别人叫他”玻璃人” |
| [04:21] | Julie and I had overslept, | Julie和我睡过头了 |
| [04:23] | so we didn’t have time for | 所以我们没时间进行 |
| [04:24] | our usual seven solid minutes of lovemaking. | 我们常规的七分钟性爱 |
| [04:27] | We had to fake it. | 只好假装一下了 |
| [04:28] | Oh, yeah! Don’t stop! | 哦耶 别停下 |
| [04:32] | Pull my hair! | 抓我的头发 |
| [04:34] | Shut up and take it, you stupid bitch! | 闭嘴享受吧 你这个蠢贱人 |
| [04:36] | OK, well, we can stop there. | 好了 我们可以打住了 |
| [04:38] | Um, now it’s time to ring the sex gong. | 现在该敲响性爱之锣了 |
| [04:41] | – What? – Turk and I got sex gongs in Chinatown. | – 什么 – Turk和我在唐人街买了性爱之锣 |
| [04:43] | We’re supposed to ring when one of us gets lucky. | 我们中不论谁滚了床单都要敲敲锣 |
| [04:46] | Even though I don’t live with him, | 虽然我们不住在一起 |
| [04:48] | I like to think that | 我还是认为 |
| [04:49] | somewhere he hears it and it makes him happy. | 冥冥中他可以听到 这会让他很开心 |
| [04:51] | That’s so funny. | 好有趣啊 |
| [04:58] | Yeah, buddy! That’s my dawg! | 真棒伙计 真是我的好兄弟 |
| [05:04] | I hope my gong wasn’t too loud for you this morning. | 希望我的锣没有吵到你 |
| [05:06] | I know it can be. | 我知道它声音很大 |
| [05:07] | It’s a loud gong. I mean, it’s like, “Gong.” | 它的声音真的好大 我是说 就像 “锣啊” |
| [05:11] | J.D., I knew you were faking | J.D. 我知道你们今天早上是装的 |
| [05:12] | ’cause at the end you didn’t say, “Bombs away.” | 因为结束时你并没有说”投弹完毕” |
| [05:14] | How could I forget my sexiest move? | 我怎么会忘了我最性感的招数呢 |
| [05:17] | Great. Julie thinks I’m weird and lame and pathe… | 完了 Julie肯定觉得我很奇怪 很逊 很可悲 |
| [05:20] | J.D., she likes you. | J.D 她喜欢你 |
| [05:22] | Do yourself a favor and stay out of your head for once. | 你真没什么好过分担心的 |
| [05:24] | OK, from this moment on, I am officially out of my head. | 好吧 从现在开始 我要彻底不想这件事 |
| [05:30] | Ugh. I’m an old hag. I mean look at her. | 唉 我已经跟个老太婆一样了 看看她 |
| [05:32] | Everything’s so tight and perky. | 全身都那么紧致坚挺 |
| [05:34] | Come on, Carla, it’s not her fault. Just do what you always do. | 别这样 Carla 这不是她的错 做你该做的事 |
| [05:38] | Turn the other cheek and | 宽容一点 |
| [05:39] | quietly spread the rumor that she’s a guy. | 然后悄悄散布谣言说她是个男人吧 |
| [05:42] | Hey, Turk. Guess what…? | 嘿 Turk 知道吗 |
| [05:44] | She’s not a guy, honey. And besides, | 她不是个男人 宝贝 还有啊 |
| [05:46] | “Young Carla” Is a compliment. | “年轻版Carla”是对你的赞美 |
| [05:47] | Really? So how would you feel if I said, “Hey, it’s Skinny Turk”? | 是吗 那如果我说”嘿 那是苗条版的Turk嘛”你什么感觉 |
| [05:51] | And now his boyfriend will comfort him. | 现在他男朋友该出场安慰他了 |
| [05:53] | Don’t listen to her, Brown Bear. Your body’s fierce. | 别听她的 小棕熊 你的身体很完美 |
| [05:56] | – Is it? – Like Taye Diggs. | – 真的吗 – 跟Taye Diggs一样 |
| [05:58] | Taye Diggs Taye Diggs. | |
| [06:01] | Luckily, I had a best friend too. | 幸运的是 我也有个闺蜜 |
| [06:04] | So, what did “Her” Name used to be? | 那么”她”以前的名字是啥 |
| [06:07] | – How about Alberto? – I’ll spread the word. | – Alberto如何 – 我去散布消息了 |
| [06:11] | Alberto Alberto. | |
| [06:13] | When am I gonna get to meet Julie? | 我什么时候可以见见Julie |
| [06:15] | Do I want her to meet Turk this soon? | 我希望她这么快就和Turk见面吗 |
| [06:17] | What if he doesn’t like her? | 如果他不喜欢她怎么办 |
| [06:18] | What are you doing? | 你在干啥 |
| [06:20] | I’m saying all my thoughts out loud | 我要把我的想法大声的说出来 |
| [06:22] | so I don’t mess this relationship up. | 这样我就不会搞砸了 |
| [06:24] | I don’t understand. | 我不明白 |
| [06:26] | I forgot, sometimes Turk is slow. | 我忘了 Turk有时候很迟钝 |
| [06:28] | You know what? It’s time for her to meet the people in my life. | 知道吗 是时候让她见见我的朋友了 |
| [06:31] | I think she’s gonna do great. | 我想她会表现很好的 |
| [06:35] | Did you know that J.D.’s parents thought he was gonna be a girl? | 你知道吗 J.D.的父母以为他会是个女孩子 |
| [06:37] | They didn’t have a name when he was born. | 他出生的时候他们没准备好名字 |
| [06:39] | So until he was three, they called him Joanna. | 所以他三岁之前都叫”Joanna” |
| [06:43] | I don’t know who you are, | 我不知道你是谁 |
| [06:46] | but thank you for this. | 但是太感谢了 |
| [06:51] | So, what do you think? | 你觉得怎么样 |
| [06:52] | Sure. I guess I can hide this in my basement for you. | 好的 我想我可以把这个藏到我的地下室 |
| [06:55] | OK. Great. Great. | 好的 不错 不错 |
| [06:56] | You know what? Let’s just give that back. Thanks. | 知道吗 咱们还是还给人家吧 谢谢 |
| [06:59] | Nice to see you, Mickhead. | 很高兴见到你 Mickhead |
| [07:04] | Look, Julie, I’m very protective of J.D., | 听着 Julie 我可是特别关照J.D.的 |
| [07:07] | so it’s gonna take a lot to win me over. | 想过我这关你可得下点功夫 |
| [07:09] | J.D. Wanted me to introduce you to my godfather. | J.D.希望我把你介绍给我的教父 |
| [07:13] | Julie’s a great girl. | Julie是个很棒的女孩哦 |
| [07:18] | Lando Calrissian Lando Calrissian! | |
| [07:20] | Come here. Come here. | 过来 过来 |
| [07:23] | You can call me Billy Dee. | 叫我Billy Dee就行 |
| [07:24] | Yes, Lando. Yes. | 好的 Lando 好的 |
| [07:29] | Julie, you already won carla and me over | Julie 你已经过了Carla和我这关 |
| [07:31] | because you’re nice to J.D. | 因为你对J.D.很好 |
| [07:32] | You won Jordan over, you bought the first round. | 你过了Jordan这关因为你请了第一轮酒 |
| [07:35] | I got lemon drops! | 柠檬滴鸡尾酒来啦 |
| [07:37] | Oh, the last time I had one, | 噢 我上次喝了杯这个 |
| [07:39] | I agreed to go on a date | 结果我同意 |
| [07:39] | with a chick in my art history class. Mm-mm. | 跟我美术史班上的一个小妞约会去了 不喝 |
| [07:42] | Yeah, can we go somewhere less college-y? | 是啊 我们可以去个不这么幼稚的地方吗 |
| [07:45] | One of the boys here could be the baby I gave up in high school. | 说不定这里还会有被我甩掉的高中小男生呢 |
| [07:48] | We aren’t too old to hang out here. Come on. | 我们还没老到不能在这玩儿吧 别这样嘛 |
| [07:51] | Mmm… | 恩 |
| [07:52] | Time to dial up the Spanish. | 是时候西班牙语出马了 |
| [07:54] | That always makes them feel guilty | 那总会让她们觉得内疚 |
| [07:56] | they haven’t spent time around minorities. | 因为她们花在少数民族人员上的时间太少了 |
| [08:03] | – Whatever. – Let’s do it. | – 好吧好吧 – 来吧 |
| [08:05] | To being young. | 永远年轻 |
| [08:09] | You guys, for real, you’re my best friends. | 你们这些家伙 说真的 你们是我最好的朋友 |
| [08:15] | So Carol… do you like jazz? | 那么Carol 你喜欢爵士吗 |
| [08:19] | Yeah? How much? | 是吗 有多喜欢 |
| [08:25] | Hey, look at what we have here. | 嘿 看看这都是谁啊 |
| [08:27] | It‘s a visual representation of | 简直是酒精对不同年龄人群 |
| [08:28] | how alcohol affects different ages. | 产生的影响的一堆活生生的例子啊 |
| [08:30] | – We have the young… – Morning! | – 有年轻的 – 早安 |
| [08:32] | – …the slightly older… – Stop talking. | – 稍老点的 – 别说话 |
| [08:35] | …the slightly older still… | 还是稍老点的 |
| [08:37] | …and last, the very, very, very old. | 最后 非常非常非常非常老的 |
| [08:40] | She is unconscious and virtually unwakeable. Witness. | 她不省人事而且真的喊都喊不醒 看着 |
| [08:44] | Jor-da-roo! Jor-da-licious! Jor-da-roni! Ha-ha! | Jordan小蛋卷 Jordan小点心 Jordan通心粉 哈哈 |
| [08:48] | We’ll get you ladies some more coffee. | 我们去给你们再拿点咖啡吧 |
| [08:50] | Jordan, if you’re willing to pay for it, just sit there frozen. | Jordan 如果你想付钱的话 就坐着别动 |
| [08:54] | How very generous. | 真大方啊 |
| [08:55] | That’s so funny. | 好有趣啊 |
| [08:58] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [09:00] | – Julie’s awesome. – Doesn’t it bother you | – Julie真的很棒 – 她从来不笑 |
| [09:02] | – she never laughs or anything? – What do you mean? | – 你难道觉得不奇怪吗 – 你在说啥 |
| [09:04] | When something’s funny, she never laughs. | 她看到好笑的事从来不笑 |
| [09:07] | She just says, “That’s so funny.” It’s kind of annoying. | 她只是说”好有趣啊” 真有点烦人啊 |
| [09:12] | J.D., this is an intervention. | J.D. 这是场劝导大会 |
| [09:14] | First off, I just want to say, everyone here loves you. | 首先我要说 在座的人都很爱你 |
| [09:18] | This is a safe space. But you’re such a commit-a-phobe! | 这里很安全 但是你真是个害怕承诺的胆小鬼啊 |
| [09:22] | Every time you date a girl with potential, | 每当你遇到一个有可能继续发展的女孩 |
| [09:25] | you wind up ruining it over some trivial reason. | 你就会用一些扯淡的理由搞砸它 |
| [09:28] | Think about the great girls you let slip through your fingers. | 想想那些你错过的好女孩吧 |
| [09:31] | Kylie, Jaime, Gift Shop Girl, | Kylie Jaime 礼品店的女孩 |
| [09:35] | Minnie McSkinny, Mole Butt, Tina Two-kids, Rumplefugly… | 健美Minnie 屁股有痣的女孩 有俩孩子的Tina 丑八怪 |
| [09:41] | I’m forgetting someone. | 还有谁我没说的 |
| [09:42] | Oh, my God, Turk. If you forget Elliot she’s gonna cry. | 天哪 Turk 如果你忘了Elliot 她要哭了 |
| [09:46] | Turk, aren’t you forgetting the greatest girl of them all? | Turk 你是不是忘了她们中最棒的那个女孩 |
| [09:50] | Heidi Horse-Face. | 马脸Heidi |
| [09:52] | Me, Turk! She’s talking about me, OK? | 我 Turk 她是在说我 好吗 |
| [09:55] | Relax, Elliot. You’re Mole Butt. | 别激动 Elliot 你是屁股上有痣那个 |
| [09:58] | Really? | 真的吗 |
| [10:01] | Sorry, Turk. | 对不起 Turk |
| [10:03] | J.D., there’s somebody else here who wants to say something. | J.D. 还有别人想对你提提意见 |
| [10:07] | Don’t mess this up, man. Be smooth. | 别搞砸了 伙计 机灵点 |
| [10:11] | – Lando’s right. – Billy Dee! | – Lando说的对 – 我是Billy Dee |
| [10:14] | Lando Lando. | |
| [10:17] | Joanna, now I’m not much | Joanna 我对这种 |
| [10:20] | for this sensitive crap. | 感性的破事不太擅长 |
| [10:22] | But darn it all, you’ve found someone | 但是该死的 既然有人愿意让你去烦 |
| [10:24] | who’s willing to let you annoy them instead of me. | 你就不用来烦我 |
| [10:27] | Don’t screw up, J.D., or you’re gonna end up where you always do, | 别搞砸了 J.D. 不然你又要像以前一样 |
| [10:30] | lying on that couch in the fatal position | 半死不活的躺到沙发上 |
| [10:32] | wishing you hadn’t driven another one away. | 后悔自己又赶跑了一个女孩儿 |
| [10:34] | If Jordan were conscious, she’d… she’d agree. | 如果Jordan是清醒的 她肯定也会这么想的 |
| [10:39] | Now who put that fake arrow through her head? | 谁在她头上插了支假箭 |
| [10:42] | Huh? Which one of ya? | 恩 你们谁干的 |
| [10:45] | It was me. I did it. | 是我 我干的 |
| [10:50] | I gotta get cooking. | 我得开始做饭了 |
| [10:51] | People are going to be here for this barbecue any second. | 人们马上就要来烧烤了 |
| [10:54] | – Your friends really liked me? – They’re crazy about you. | – 你的朋友真的喜欢我吗 – 他们都爱上你了 |
| [10:57] | They’re worried I’m gonna mess this whole thing up. | 他们是担心我会搞砸 |
| [10:59] | Nah. You’re not gonna be | 不会的 你不会像个混蛋一样 |
| [11:00] | a jerk and do something like that, are you? | 搞砸一切吧 对不 |
| [11:02] | The only jerk around here is | 这里唯一的混蛋(肉干) |
| [11:05] | the spicy marinade on this Jamaican chicken, mon. | 是这些加了香辣腌料的牙买加鸡肉 |
| [11:09] | That’s so funny. | 好有趣啊 |
| [11:10] | It is, Julie. It is. Why do you always do that? | 是啊 Julie 是啊 你为什么总那样做 |
| [11:14] | Do what? | 做什么了 |
| [11:15] | You never laugh when something’s funny. | 有好笑的事你从来不笑 |
| [11:17] | You say, “That’s so funny.” | 你光说 “好有趣啊” |
| [11:19] | Does that bother you? | 你不喜欢这样吗 |
| [11:24] | Don’t mean to bother anybody. | 不想故意打搅你们 |
| [11:26] | I’m showing Nurse Martinez around. | 我只是带着Martinez护士到处转转 |
| [11:28] | That’s our chief of medicine, | 那是我们内科主任 |
| [11:30] | that’s a patient and that is you in 20 years. | 那是个病人 那是20年后的你 |
| [11:34] | OK. Let’s go look at dead people. | 好了 咱们去看看死人吧 |
| [11:39] | That nurse makes me feel so damn old. | 那个护士让我觉得自己老死了 |
| [11:42] | Oh, calm down, Nurse Espinosa. | 冷静点 Espinosa护士 |
| [11:44] | I have it on good authority that she’s a dude. | 我有准确消息她是个男人 |
| [11:48] | I made that stuff up. | 那是我编的 |
| [11:50] | Then it’s time for her to meet Bob Kelso, licensed hetero. | 那得让她重新认识一下Bob Kelso 标准异性恋 |
| [11:57] | Sweetie, you’re not old. You don’t have crow’s feet. | 亲爱的 你不老 你还没有鱼尾纹呢 |
| [12:00] | Your bra size hasn’t gone from a 34B to a 40 long. | 你的胸罩也没有34B下坠到40长啊 |
| [12:04] | And you don’t have arthritis. | 而且你也没有关节炎 |
| [12:07] | Neither do I, but that’s how it gets ya. | 我也没有 但是人就是这么慢慢变老的 |
| [12:09] | Then Mrs. Wilk said something that really surprised me. | 然后Wilk太太说了句让我非常震惊的话 |
| [12:13] | It’s not like you’re trying to get pregnant and you can’t. | 而且你也并没有想怀孕却怀不上的情况 |
| [12:17] | Actually, I am. | 其实 我真的怀不上 |
| [12:20] | Oh. | 噢 |
| [12:25] | None of us were the least bit surprised | 我们对于J.D.做出这种事 |
| [12:28] | that J.D. Made this happen. | 都不觉得吃惊 |
| [12:29] | Why is Julie behind that bush crying? | Julie为啥在灌木丛里哭啊 |
| [12:32] | Who knows? Could be anything. | 谁知道呢 啥都有可能 |
| [12:37] | You know what’s interesting, Turk? | Turk 知道有趣的是什么吗 |
| [12:39] | She’s not saying, “That’s so sad.” | 她没说”好糟糕啊” |
| [12:42] | She’s actually crying. | 她倒真的哭了 |
| [12:44] | – You’re an idiot. – Yes, I am. | – 你是个蠢蛋 – 我就是 |
| [12:51] | I tried, but I just couldn’t get babies off my mind. | 我努力了 但是我就是没法不去想孩子的事 |
| [12:56] | Excuse me, fellas. Gotta take a whiz. | 让让 伙计们 内急内急 |
| [12:59] | Wait a minute. Why am I rushing? | 等等 我急个啥呢 |
| [13:06] | All right. | 好了 |
| [13:11] | You’re disgusting. | 你好恶心 |
| [13:15] | She’s right. I am disgusting. | 她说的对 我让人恶心 |
| [13:17] | I’m disgustingly incapable of carrying on a relationship | 我就是无法好好维持 |
| [13:20] | with someone I actually like. | 和一个我真的喜欢的女孩的关系 |
| [13:22] | I apologized to her, so I think we’re cool for now, | 我跟她道了歉 所以我们现在应该是和好了 |
| [13:24] | but it won’t last. Every time she says, “That’s so funny,” | 但是估计维持不了多久 每当她说 “好有趣啊” |
| [13:27] | it’s like nails on a chalkboard to me. | 对我来说就像听着指甲在黑板上划一样难受 |
| [13:30] | – You’re too picky with women. – You used to be the same way. | – 你对女人太挑剔了 – 你以前也这样啊 |
| [13:33] | Somehow you got over it and you’re married. | 不知道你怎么克服的 而且结婚了 |
| [13:35] | ‘Cause I was never as bad as you. | 因为我从来不像你那么坏 |
| [13:37] | Oh, really? Remember “Whitney the Snapper?” | 真的吗 还记得”响指Whitney”吗 |
| [13:43] | Hey. I just wanted to say thanks for dinner tonight. | 嘿 谢谢你今晚的晚餐 |
| [13:46] | And for dessert you’re gonna get a little Whitney… | 甜点就让你尝尝Whitney的味道吧 |
| [13:49] | …a La mode. | 加冰淇淋的哟 |
| [13:52] | Get out. | 滚出去 |
| [13:55] | Too much. | 太过分了 |
| [13:57] | Carla,you’ve been off the pill two months. | Carla 你才停吃避孕药两个月而已 |
| [13:59] | Why are you getting a fertility test? | 为什么非要做生育力检查 |
| [14:01] | Because I’m old and the crock pot is on the fritz. | 因为我老了 肚子里可能有毛病了 |
| [14:04] | – No reason. – Carla Espinosa? | – 不为啥 – Carla Espinosa |
| [14:06] | – Yes. – Dr. Matthews will see you now. | – 在 – Mattews医生现在可以见你了 |
| [14:08] | – Great. – Oh. | – 太好了 – 噢 |
| [14:12] | OK, he is super cute. | 好吧 他非常非常帅 |
| [14:13] | So do not look into his eyes. You could get lost. | 所以别盯着他的眼睛看啊 你会醉倒的 |
| [14:17] | I’ll be fine. | 我会没事的 |
| [14:21] | Ask him if he remembers me from my pelvic exam! | 问问他记不记得给我做过骨盆检查 |
| [14:25] | Ask him! | 问问啊 |
| [14:31] | I made popcorn. Ah! | 我做了爆米花 哎哟 |
| [14:34] | You OK, sweetness? | 你没事吧 甜心 |
| [14:36] | – I’ll go make some more. – All right. | – 我再重新做点儿吧 – 好的 |
| [14:38] | – Why are we watching a movie? – It’s called immersion therapy. | – 我们为啥要看电影 – 这叫浸入式疗法 |
| [14:42] | What we’re about to watch | 我们要看的这个电影 |
| [14:43] | will make her say “That’s so funny” So many times | 会让她不停的说 “好有趣啊” |
| [14:46] | that eventually it’s not gonna bother you any more. | 最后让你都麻木了 |
| [14:48] | How can you guarantee she’s gonna laugh at this movie? | 你怎么能保证她会觉得好笑 |
| [14:50] | I can’t. But Uncle Buck can. | 我当然不行 但是 |
| [14:54] | That’s so funny. | 好有趣啊 |
| [14:56] | That’s so funny. Look how big that pancake is! That’s so funny. | 好有趣啊 看看这个煎饼多大啊 好有趣啊 |
| [15:00] | Make her stop! | 别让她再说了 |
| [15:03] | That’s so funny! | 好有趣啊 |
| [15:09] | This guy’s not that hot. | 这男人没那么火辣 |
| [15:11] | You’ve only been trying for two months, | 你才试了两个月 |
| [15:13] | so I don’t think you need a fertility test yet. | 所以我觉得你不需要做生育力检查 |
| [15:15] | Unless, of course, you’re over 35. | 当然了 除非你已经超过35岁 |
| [15:17] | Well, buddy, I’m 36 and OK with it. | 好吧 伙计 我36了 而且我觉得没问题 |
| [15:21] | So how old are you? | 那么你多大了 |
| [15:24] | Ravish me. | 蹂躏我吧 |
| [15:27] | I’m 29. | 我29了 |
| [15:29] | I’ve been seeing a lot of 29-year-olds lately. | 我最近见的很多人都正好是29岁哟 |
| [15:31] | – Oh, my God, really? – Yeah. Like her. | – 天哪 是吗 – 是啊 她就是 |
| [15:34] | Call me J.J. | 叫我J.J. |
| [15:41] | – Immersion therapy didn’t work. – Dude, relax. | – 浸入式疗法不管用 – 伙计 放松点 |
| [15:43] | I was a psych minor in college. | 我大学的时候辅修心理学 |
| [15:45] | The next time she says, “That’s so funny,” | 下次她再说 “好有趣啊” |
| [15:47] | I want you to pretend she’s says, “That’s so money.” | 我希望你假装她说的是 “好有钱啊” |
| [15:51] | Ooh, I like that. | 噢 我喜欢 |
| [15:53] | Yeah. It’s called word replacement… ism. | 是吧 这叫做词汇置换疗法 |
| [15:59] | This is the dumbest conversation I’ve ever heard. | 这是我听过最愚蠢的对话 |
| [16:01] | You should hear this one. | 你应该来听听这边的 |
| [16:05] | I remember my first exam with Dr. Matthews. | 我记得Mattews医生给我做的第一次检查 |
| [16:08] | He said, “You’re healthy down there.” | 他说 “你下面很健康” |
| [16:10] | And then I said, “Right back at you.” | 然后我说 “你也是哟” |
| [16:13] | And then there was this weird little awkward pause, so I said, | 然后是一段尴尬的沉默 于是我说 |
| [16:16] | “I like to keep a clean shop.” | “我喜欢洗洗更健康” |
| [16:18] | And then he asked to see my insurance card. | 然后他就要看我的医保卡了 |
| [16:22] | So, how did your fertility test go? | 那你的生育能力检查怎么样 |
| [16:24] | Everything is A-OK. | 一切都很好 |
| [16:26] | Oh, that’s bull! | 胡扯八道 |
| [16:29] | – Excuse me, sir? – I was talking to these ladies. | – 怎么了 老大 – 我在跟这些女士们说 |
| [16:32] | I was talking to you ladies. Newbie, listen to me. | 我在跟你们这俩女生说 菜鸟 听着 |
| [16:34] | You never stop being annoyed by the little things. | 永远都会有些小事让你觉得心烦意乱 |
| [16:37] | Take Gandhi here. Your wife is the bossiest woman I’ve ever met. | 比如这个甘地 你的妻子是我见过最强势的女人 |
| [16:42] | Are you trying to tell me that you’re not bothered by that any more? | 你敢说你一点意见也没有吗 |
| [16:45] | Sometimes I watch Roots to remind myself how good I have it. | 有时我会看 |
| [16:49] | Me too. | 我也是 |
| [16:50] | Everyone is annoying. I mean, take Jordan. | 人人都很烦人 我是说 比如Jordan |
| [16:53] | She is just now returning from what I can only assume | 她现在刚做完妇科检查回来 |
| [16:55] | is her eleventh gynecological visit this month. | 这个月 光我知道的她都做了11次了 |
| [16:58] | I’m saving my breast exam for when you go away next month. | 我要等你下个月不在的时候做再做乳房检查 |
| [17:02] | Upsetting, but we persevere. Bottom line: | 烦死人了 但是我们可以熬过去 因为 |
| [17:06] | There is no such thing as a perfect person. You. Tell her. | 人无完人 你 告诉她 |
| [17:11] | All right. If you found someone | 好吧 如果你遇见一个人 |
| [17:13] | who makes you happy by just sitting around and holding hands, | 只是一起牵手坐着 都可以让你感到幸福 |
| [17:17] | then eventually all that other stuff won’t matter. | 那么其他所有一切都不是问题 |
| [17:19] | Mmm. | 恩 |
| [17:20] | – Dude, not me. – I know. | – 伙计 不是我 – 我知道 |
| [17:23] | Nurse Espinosa, I know you didn’t take that fertility test. | Espinosa护士 我知道你没做生育力检查 |
| [17:27] | People think I am some clueless old geezer, | 人们以为我是个一无所知的老头子 |
| [17:29] | but nothing that happens in these hallways gets by me. | 但是这里发生的一切都逃不过我的法眼 |
| [17:33] | It wasn’t me. I didn’t do it! | 不是我 不是我干的 |
| [17:35] | If I take that fertility test | 如果我做了生育力检查 |
| [17:37] | and I find out that I missed | 发现我已经错过了 |
| [17:38] | my window to have a kid I’ll never forgive myself. | 要孩子的最好阶段 我永远不会原谅自己的 |
| [17:41] | If you’re worried about your biological legacy, | 如果你担心血统传承问题 |
| [17:43] | as the father of a son who | 我倒是有儿子的人了 |
| [17:44] | not only wrote a musical based on my life | 但我儿子不但把我的生活写成一部舞台剧 |
| [17:46] | but is currently shacked up with the actor playing me, honestly, sweatheart | 而且现在还跟演我的演员同居啊 亲爱的 |
| [17:49] | it’s not all it’s cracked up to be. But I know you. | 所以老实说有孩子也没你想的那么好 但是我了解你 |
| [17:53] | You’ll find out eventually, | 你是不会死心的 |
| [17:55] | so why don’t you just turn around and tell him? | 所以为啥不现在转身去告诉他呢 |
| [17:59] | Oh. | 噢 |
| [18:03] | Dr. Matthews. | Mattews医生 |
| [18:07] | – I’m 36. – Oh. | – 我36岁了 – 噢 |
| [18:11] | Well, let’s get you that fertility test. Follow me. | 那么我带你去做个生殖力检查吧 跟我来 |
| [18:14] | Ok. | 好的 |
| [18:15] | Here goes nothing. | 好了 豁出去了 |
| [18:19] | One-A-Day Vitamins? | 一天一片维他命 |
| [18:22] | I tell you how they could double their profits. | 我告诉你他们怎么赚两倍的利润 |
| [18:24] | Two-a-Day Vitamins. | 一天两片维他命 |
| [18:25] | That’s so funny. | 好有趣啊 |
| [18:28] | I’m sorry I said, “That’s so funny.” | 对不起我又说 “好有趣了” |
| [18:30] | I know that drives you crazy. | 我知道那让你抓狂 |
| [18:33] | You know what? | 你知道吗 |
| [18:37] | I really couldn’t care less. | 我真的一点也不在意 |
| [18:41] | So, what do we do now? | 那么我们现在该怎么办呢 |
| [18:43] | I don’t know. We’ve already got the half acre, right? | 我不知道 我们已经买了半英亩地 对吧 |
| [18:46] | I imagine we’ll eventually be able to build a house on it. | 我可以想象我们最终在那块地上面盖起了房子 |
| [18:49] | Backyard. | 还有后院 |
| [18:50] | Room for a Slip ‘N Slide | 我们的孩子Gilligan和Skipper |
| [18:51] | for our kids, Gilligan and the Skipper. | 将会住在装有滑梯的房间里 |
| [18:53] | I know. I’m sorry. I gotta do it. I lost a bet to Turk. | 我知道 抱歉啦 得起这俩名字 我跟Turk打赌输了 |
| [18:56] | And I don’t want to rush things, but I feel good about this. | 我并不想仓促行事 但是这次我感觉很好 |
| [18:59] | I don’t know. I feel like… you and I could go the distance. | 说不清 我觉得你和我可以走的很远 |
| [19:04] | Um, actually, I meant what do you want to order from take-out for dinner. | 恩 事实上 我是想说 你想叫什么外卖当晚餐 |
| [19:09] | Oh. | 噢 |
| [19:11] | – Tapas. – I love tapas. | – 西班牙小吃吧 – 我很喜欢吃 |
| [19:13] | – Grateful sharing. – Sharing is fun. | – 很棒的分享 – 分享真的很好 |
| [19:15] | – I love it. Just share. – Share. | – 我喜欢 分享 – 分享 |
| [19:20] | So you really don’t think about that kind of stuff? | 那么说你真的没想过那些事 |
| [19:22] | J.D., I’m only 23. I don’t even know if I want any of that stuff. | J.D. 我才23岁 我都不知道我是不是想要你说的那些 |
| [19:26] | And certainly not for the next five or ten years. | 未来五年或者十年是绝对不可能的 |
| [19:29] | You know what? | 你知道吗 |
| [19:30] | We just started dating, | 我们刚开始约会 |
| [19:32] | so I have a feeling this conversation goes down a bad road. | 我觉得这话题明显方向不对 |
| [19:35] | Why don’t we say we’re never gonna talk about it ever again. | 我们以后不要再谈论这个了吧 |
| [19:37] | – ok. – ok. | – 好的 – 好 |
| [19:38] | – OK. Phew. – OK. | – 好 唔 – 好 |
| [19:45] | So you really feel that way? | 你真的那样想吗 |
| [19:49] | And here I am again. | 我又倒在这儿了 |
| [19:51] | I can’t believe I broke up with her. Why do I keep doing this? | 不敢相信我跟她分手了 我为啥总这么做 |
| [19:54] | J.D., this was totally different. | J.D. 这次可不一样 |
| [19:56] | You didn’t break up because she said, “That’s so funny” | 你和她分手不是因为她爱说 “好有趣啊” |
| [19:59] | or she sang Christmas carols in the summer. | 或者是她在夏天唱圣诞颂歌 |
| [20:01] | It was August. The weather was far from frightful. | 那可是八月份 天气一点都不可怕 |
| [20:04] | You broke up with her for a real reason. Right, Carla? | 你和她分手是确实有原因的 对不 Carla |
| [20:08] | Definitely. | 当然 |
| [20:10] | Oh, my God, what did I just agree to? | 我的天 我刚才同意啥了 |
| [20:13] | All I can think about is getting my test results back. | 我现在满脑子都是我的检查结果的事 |
| [20:15] | I have to get out of my head. Just say something positive. | 我不能再想了 赶紧说点正能量的话吧 |
| [20:19] | She’s a keeper, J.D. You’ll never do better. | 她是个可以厮守的人 J.D. 你找不到比她更好的了 |
| [20:22] | I guess it’s human nature to worry about the future. | 我想担心未来是人类的天性 |
| [20:25] | Especially when we think our dreams might not come true. | 尤其是当我们认为我们的梦想不会实现的时候 |
| [20:30] | Thanks. Thanks, Dr. Matthews. That’s great news. | 谢谢 谢谢 Mattews医生 真是好消息 |
| [20:34] | Turk Turk! | |
| [20:36] | – Yeah, baby. – Get over here. | – 来了 宝贝 – 快过来 |
| [20:40] | Yeah! | 耶 |
| [20:48] | Yeah, buddy! | 给力啊 兄弟 |
| [20:52] | As for my future, | 至于我的未来 |
| [20:53] | I had finally gotten to the place | 我已经准备好 |
| [20:55] | where I was looking for the right person. | 遇到我的真命天女了 |
| [20:58] | And I knew she was out there. | 我知道她就在那儿 |
| [21:00] | Even if I couldn’t quite see her yet. | 即使我还看不清她的身影 |