| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | The worst part about a car breaking down… | 车坏了的时候最糟糕的事情是… |
| [00:05] | …is you’re a guy. Because now you have to get out… | 你是一个男人 因为你不得不下车… |
| [00:08] | …and pretend like you know what you’re doing. | 并装作你知道要做什么 |
| [00:11] | You gotta go, “All right, honey, I’m gonna go check it out.” | 你要说：“没事，亲爱的 我去检查一下” |
| [00:17] | Walk around the front, open up the hood. | 然后走到车前方，打开车头盖 |
| [00:19] | That’s good, it obscures her view. | 这样做很不错，可以挡住她的视线 |
| [00:21] | That’s the main reason you want to do that. | 这就是你要那样做的主要原因 |
| [00:23] | You’re looking in there, hoping you’re going to see something in there… | 你要盯着那里看，希望能发现一些… |
| [00:27] | …so simple, so obvious, so incredibly easy to fix… | 很简单，很明显，很容易… |
| [00:31] | …even you can handle it. | 甚至连你都能修理的故障 |
| [00:32] | Like a giant onloff switch turned off. | 比如说一个巨大的开关键没打开 |
| [00:35] | -=The Last Fantasy=- | |
| [00:36] | “螺丝粉杰瑞” “螺丝粉杰瑞” | |
| [00:39] | So you’re going out with David Puddy. | 你在跟大卫・帕蒂约会吗 |
| [00:42] | Yeah. What, is that a problem? | 是啊，怎么了，有问题吗？ |
| [00:43] | I think he could’ve asked me. He’s supposed to be a friend mine. | 我以为他会问问我 他应该也算是我的朋友吧 |
| [00:47] | I guess he figured you wouldn’t care. It has been a few years. | 我觉得他认为你不会在意的 都已经好几年了 |
| [00:50] | Elaine, you always care who an ex-girlfriend dates. | 伊莲，作为男人 你总会在乎前女友跟谁约会的 |
| [00:53] | You don’t want someone you know… | 你不希望是个你认识的人… |
| [00:55] | …and you don’t want someone better than you. | 也不希望是个比你好的人 |
| [00:57] | Now, even though the latter is obviously impossible… | 现在嘛，虽然后一条 明显不可能了… |
| [01:00] | – Oh, God. …the former still applies. | – 啊，我的天啊 – 但前一条还是适用的嘛 |
| [01:02] | I don’t know, I just can’t see you with a mechanic. | 我不知道，我只是看不惯 你跟一个机械师在一起 |
| [01:05] | Oh, yeah, right, right. | 啊，是啊，好吧，好吧 |
| [01:06] | All those mechanics do is work all day with their hands… | 那些机械师所做的一切 就是用他们的双手… |
| [01:09] | …and their big muscular arms… | 和他们肌肉发达的胳膊 在机器上工作 |
| [01:11] | …on machines, and then they come home… | 然后回到家里… |
| [01:13] | …dripping with animal sexuality like Stanley Kowalski. | 像野兽一样地做爱 就跟斯坦利・科沃斯奇一样 （斯坦利・科沃斯奇：《欲望号街车》中男主角） |
| [01:17] | – What a huge turnoff that is. – All right. | – 那是个多令人讨厌的事啊！ – 好吧 |
| [01:24] | Hey, look at that. They got lobster on the menu. | 喂，快看，他们的菜单上有龙虾 |
| [01:27] | Who would order a lobster here? | 谁会在这里点龙虾啊？ |
| [01:29] | I mean, do they bring a lobster in every day hoping, “Today’s the day.” | 我的意思是，难道他们每天都买 一只龙虾，然后祈祷：“就是今天了” |
| [01:34] | So what if they have a lobster? | 那如果他们真的有龙虾呢？ |
| [01:36] | Suddenly you’re a shellfish connoisseur? | 你就突然变成了 甲壳类水生动物鉴定家了？ |
| [01:40] | I think we really need to be in front of a television set. | 我觉得我们真的要坐在电视机前面 |
| [01:43] | You take TV out of this relationship, it is just torture. | 你居然靠电视去忘记这段关系 这太痛苦了 |
| [01:49] | So I’m getting an eye job. | 嗯，我要去做个眼睛手术 |
| [01:53] | An eye job? Ma, you don’t need an eye job. | 眼睛手术？妈，你不需要这个 |
| [01:55] | – Georgie, I’m a divorcée. – You’re not a divorcée. | – 乔治，我是个离了婚的女人 – 你不是 |
| [01:58] | You’re just separated. You’re a “separatée.” | 你只是分居了 你是个分了居的女人 |
| [02:01] | – Well, I’m out there, George. – You’re not out there. | – 我已经是单身了，乔治 – 你不是 |
| [02:04] | – I am too. – You’re not out there. | – 我就是 – 你不是！ |
| [02:06] | You can’t be, because I am out there. | 你不是！ 因为我已经是单身了 |
| [02:08] | And if I see you out there… | 如果你也是单身… |
| [02:09] | …there’s not enough voltage in this world… | 这个世界上就再也没有足够的电压… |
| [02:11] | …to electroshock me back into coherence. | 可以把我从崩溃边缘拯救回来 |
| [02:16] | Well, anyway, the operation is on Tuesday… | 好吧，不管怎样 那个手术是在星期二… |
| [02:19] | …and I need you to drive me home because I’ll be all drugged up. | 我想你开车把我送回家 因为到时我是打了麻醉药的 |
| [02:23] | Tuesday? I can’t do Tuesday. Steinbrenner needs me… | 星期二？星期二我不行 斯坦布鲁纳需要我… |
| [02:26] | This is the only time the doctor had. | 但那是医生唯一有空的日子啊 |
| [02:29] | – Kramer, hey! Come on over here. – I gotta go somewhere. | – 喂，克莱默！来这！ – 我正要去别的地方呢 |
| [02:32] | No, you’re gonna sit down, you son of a gun. | 不啊，你要坐下来，你这家伙 |
| [02:34] | All right, I’m sitting down. | 好吧，我这不是坐下来了嘛 |
| [02:37] | How are you? | 你怎么样啊？ |
| [02:39] | So, Kramer, I’m getting an eye job. | 嗯，克莱默，我要去做个眼睛手术 |
| [02:43] | Yeah, good for you. | 是啊，挺好的啊 |
| [02:45] | You have to look your best. You’re out there now. | 你应该对自己好一点 毕竟你已经是单身了 |
| [02:47] | She’s not out there. | 她不是！ |
| [02:50] | – So who’s your doctor? – Bakersaul. | – 那谁是你的医生啊？ – 贝克索尔 |
| [02:54] | He’s good. He’s very good. | 他好啊，他很好的 |
| [02:56] | He worked on this kid from Guatemala with no nose… | 他给一个从危地马拉来的 没鼻子的孩子做手术… |
| [02:59] | …turned him into Ricardo Montalban. | 把他变成了里卡多・蒙特尔班 （著名演员） |
| [03:01] | Hey, Kramer, what are you doing Tuesday? | 对了，克莱默，你星期二有事吗？ |
| [03:04] | Tuesday? | 星期二？ |
| [03:06] | Why doesn’t he pick you up after the operation? | 手术后让他去接你怎么样？ |
| [03:08] | He’s got the car with the seats you like. | 他有辆车，里面的座位是你喜欢的那种 |
| [03:10] | – I don’t care. – Yeah, I know. | – 我无所谓 – 嗯，我知道 |
| [03:12] | But I can’t drive anybody anywhere until I go down to get my new plates. | 但是在我拿到我的新车号牌之前 我不能接送任何人啊 |
| [03:15] | – Well, giddyup. – All right. | – 哦，那快去准备吧 – 好吧 |
| [03:20] | I’m here to pick up my new plates. My name is Kramer. Cosmo Kramer. | 我是来拿我的新车号牌的 我的名字是克莱默，科兹莫・克莱默 |
| [03:26] | Kramer. | 克莱默 |
| [03:28] | – All right. | – All right. – 好的 – 好的 |
| [03:30] | – Sign right here, please. – Okay. | – 请在这里签名 – 好 |
| [03:37] | Alrighty. | 好了 |
| [03:38] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [03:45] | No, these don’t belong to me. I’m not the Assman. | 不，这不是我的 我不是“大屁男” （assman既有大屁男的意思，也有做爱狂的意思） |
| [03:48] | I think there’s been a mistake. | 我觉得搞错了吧 |
| [03:50] | – What’s your name again? – Cosmo Kramer. | – 再说一遍你的名字 – 科兹莫・克莱默 |
| [03:53] | Cosmo Kramer. You are the Assman. | 科莫兹・克莱默 你就是“大屁男” |
| [03:57] | No, I’m not the Assman. | 不，我不是“大屁男” |
| [04:00] | Well, as far as the state of New York is concerned, you are. | 好吧，对纽约州政府而言，你就是 |
| [04:20] | How do you feel? | 你觉得怎样？ |
| [04:22] | Fine. | 很好 |
| [04:26] | Something the matter? | 有问题？ |
| [04:27] | No. | 没有 |
| [04:30] | Then what is it? | 那到底什么事呢？ |
| [04:32] | No, nothing. | 没，没事 |
| [04:39] | Hey. | 喂 |
| [04:43] | – I was with David Puddy last night. – Yeah, so? | – 我昨晚跟大卫・帕蒂一起 – 嗯，那又怎样？ |
| [04:47] | He did the move. | 他用了那个技巧 |
| [04:50] | – What move? – You know, the move. | – 什么技巧？ – 你知道的，就是那个技巧 |
| [04:56] | Wait a second, my move? | 等等，我的技巧？ |
| [04:58] | David Puddy used my move? | 大卫・帕蒂用了我的技巧？ |
| [05:00] | – Yes, Yes. – Are you sure? | – 是啊，是啊 – 你确定？ |
| [05:02] | Jerry, there is no confusing that move with any other move. | 杰瑞，我不会把这个技巧跟别的弄混的 |
| [05:06] | I can’t believe it. He stole my move. | 我真的不敢相信 他居然偷用了我的技巧 |
| [05:10] | What else did you tell him? | 你还告诉他什么了？ |
| [05:11] | The two of you must have had quite a little chat. | 你们两个肯定谈了不少 |
| [05:14] | Oh, it wasn’t like that. I didn’t even mention you. | 啊，不是这样的 我甚至都没有提到过你 |
| [05:17] | We were in the garage. You know how garages are. | 我们当时在修车库里 你知道修车库里是怎样的吧 |
| [05:20] | They’re conducive to sex talk. It’s a high-testosterone area. | 他们聊起了性爱 那是个男人的地方 |
| [05:25] | Because of all the pistons and the lube jobs? | 因为那里有活塞和润滑剂吗？ （联想，同志们，联想…） |
| [05:27] | Well, I’m going to that garage to tell him to stop doing it. | 好，我要到那个修车库去 告诉他不要再那样做了 |
| [05:30] | – Well, wait… Wait a second. – What? | – 好，等等…等一下 – 怎么了？ |
| [05:34] | Isn’t that a little rash? | 这样做不是有点鲁莽吗？ |
| [05:37] | No, he stole my move. | 不啊，他偷用了我技巧 |
| [05:41] | Yeah, but I like the move. | 是，但我喜欢那个技巧 |
| [05:45] | Yeah, but it’s like another comedian stealing my material. | 是，但这就好像另一个 喜剧演员偷了我的素材一样 |
| [05:49] | He doesn’t even do it exactly the same. | 他也没有做得一模一样 |
| [05:51] | He uses a pinch at the end instead of the swirl. | 他结束的时候用的是掐 而不是旋转 |
| [05:56] | Oh, yeah, the pinch. I’ve done the pinch. | 哦，好，掐啊 我也掐过啊 |
| [06:00] | That’s not new. | 这一点也不新鲜 |
| [06:02] | I don’t know how you can trust any of his moves now. | 我不知道你现在怎么能 相信他任何一个技巧了 |
| [06:05] | His whole repertoire could be lifted. | 他所有的保留节目都应该被取消 |
| [06:09] | You know, it’s strange, because he’s such an honest mechanic. | 你知道吗，这很奇怪 因为他是个很正直的机械师 |
| [06:12] | I know, he’s probably the only honest mechanic in New York. | 我知道，他大概是纽约 唯一一个正直的机械师了吧 |
| [06:15] | So he stole my move, and he’s using it on Elaine. | 他偷用了我的技巧，用在了伊莲身上 |
| [06:18] | You told David Puddy your move, and you didn’t tell me? | 你把你的技巧告诉了大卫・帕蒂 而不告诉我？ |
| [06:21] | I need a move. You know I have no moves, Jerry. | 我需要一个技巧 你知道我没有技巧的，杰瑞 |
| [06:23] | – Give me a bite. – Can I just get it open first? | – 让我咬一口 – 我能先把它打开吗？ |
| [06:25] | I can’t believe you’re hoarding sex moves. | 我真不敢相信你居然私藏性技巧 |
| [06:28] | I’m rubbing two sticks together, you’re walking around with a Zippo. | 我在用两根棍子在摩擦生火 你却拿着Zippo打火机到处走 |
| [06:31] | All right, all right. Here. | 好吧，好吧，给你 |
| [06:34] | That’s good. That’s very good. | 好吃，真好吃 |
| [06:35] | – You feel better? – Yeah, much better. | – 你觉得好点了吗？ – 嗯，好多了 |
| [06:37] | So, what’s the move? Because I need something. | 嗯，那个技巧到底是怎样的？ 我需要些技巧 |
| [06:40] | This woman I’m dating is doing her nails during lovemaking. | 跟我约会的那个女人 居然在做爱的时候弄她的指甲 |
| [06:43] | – Nancy Klopper? – Yeah. | – 南西・科洛帕？ – 是啊 |
| [06:44] | I’ve never seen anyone so bored. | 我从来没见过这么提不起劲的人 |
| [06:46] | I’m working like a dog here. Give me a moan, something. | 我像只狗一样地在做 给点哼哼也行啊 |
| [06:49] | I’d settle for a belch, for God’s sake. Come on, let’s have it. | 天啊，她就是打个嗝我都已经满足了 来吧，告诉我吧 |
| [06:52] | All right, George, I’m gonna tell you. But I just want to make sure… | 好吧，乔治，我会告诉你的 但我想确认一下… |
| [06:55] | Yeah, it’s in the vault. I’m putting it in the vault. | 好了，我会保密的 确定一定以及肯定 |
| [06:58] | It’s not even a question of that. | 根本就不是这个问题 |
| [07:00] | The point is, when something like this is passed along… | 重点是，把这种东西传授给别人时… |
| [07:02] | …one must be certain that it’s going to be used in a conscientious way. | 一定要确认那个人会很尽责地使用它 |
| [07:06] | This is not some parlor trick to be used… | 这不是一个随随便便就能用的技巧… |
| [07:08] | …pell-mell or willy-nilly. – You gonna tell me or not? | – 也不能用得乱七八糟或犹豫不决 – 你到底要不要告诉我？ |
| [07:11] | All right. | 好吧 |
| [07:13] | On your bed, you got a headboard? You’ll need a headboard. | 你的床上有床头板吗？ 你会需要它的 |
| [07:16] | I got a headboard. | 我有床头板 |
| [07:17] | – Is it padded? – No. | – 那有加上衬垫吗？ – 没有 |
| [07:18] | Good. | 好 |
| [07:20] | – How tall is she? – Five-foot-4, why? | – 她有多高啊？ – 5尺4寸，怎么了？ |
| [07:23] | You can’t have more than a 1 foot differential in your heights. | 你连1尺都不能再长高了 |
| [07:26] | Otherwise you could really hurt your neck. | 否则你会弄伤你的脖子的 |
| [07:29] | I can’t tell you how much I appreciate this. | 真是感激不尽哈 |
| [07:32] | George, if you can master this, you’ll never be alone again. | 乔治，如果你把这个练熟了 你就再也不会单身了 |
| [07:38] | Now the end is kind of an option. I use the swirl. | 结尾可以说是种选择 我用的是旋转 |
| [07:41] | I like the swirl. I’m comfortable with the swirl. | 我喜欢旋转，我习惯旋转 |
| [07:44] | I feel the swirl is a great capper. | 我觉得旋转是个很好的结束 |
| [07:48] | He uses the pinch, which I find a little presumptuous. | 他用的是掐，我觉得有点过分 |
| [07:51] | – Is it a clockwise swirl? – I prefer clockwise. | – 是顺时针的旋转吗？ – 我更喜欢顺时针的 |
| [07:54] | But it’s not written in stone. | 但这不是一定的 |
| [08:01] | There you go, buddy. | 兄弟，来看看这个 |
| [08:04] | – What is it? – It’s fusilli Jerry. | – 这是什么啊？ – 这是螺丝粉杰瑞 |
| [08:11] | It’s made from fusilli pasta. | 是用螺丝粉做成的 |
| [08:13] | See the microphone? | 看到这个麦克风了吗？ |
| [08:15] | – When did you do this? – In my spare time. | – 你什么时候做的这个啊？ – 我空闲的时候 |
| [08:19] | I’m working on one of you, George. I’m using ravioli. | 我还在做一个“你”呢，乔治 我要用小方饺 |
| [08:23] | See, the hard part is to find a pasta that captures the individual. | 看吧，最难的事就是找一种 符合个人性格的面食 |
| [08:28] | – Why fusilli? – Because you’re silly. | – 那为什么是螺丝粉呢？ – 因为你很傻啊（谐音，押韵） |
| [08:34] | Get it? | 明白了吧？ |
| [08:36] | – Yeah. – Well, thank you very much. | – 好 – 好，十分感谢 |
| [08:39] | – So did you get your new plates? – Oh, yeah, I got my new plates. | – 那你拿到你的新车号牌了吗？ – 啊，对，我拿到了 |
| [08:43] | But they mixed them up. | 但他们把把车号牌弄混了 |
| [08:44] | Somebody got mine, and I got their vanity plates. | 有人拿了我的 而我拿了他浮夸的车号牌 |
| [08:47] | – What do they say? – “Assman.” | – 上面写的什么啊？ – “大屁男” |
| [08:51] | – Assman? – Yeah, Assman, Jerry. | – 大屁男？ – 是的，大屁男，杰瑞 |
| [08:53] | I’m Cosmo Kramer, the Assman. | 我是科兹莫・克莱默，大屁男 |
| [08:57] | Who would order a license plate that says Assman? | 谁会订一个上面写着“大屁男”的牌照啊？ |
| [09:00] | Maybe they’re Wilt Chamberlain’s. | 也许是威尔特・张伯伦的 （篮球巨星，号称与多个女人有性关系） |
| [09:04] | It doesn’t have to be someone who gets lots of woman. | 也不一定就是个有很多女人的男人 |
| [09:07] | It could be just some guy with a big ass. | 也是只是个大屁股的男人 |
| [09:09] | – Yeah, or it could be a proctologist. – Yeah. | – 对，也许是个直肠病医生 – 对 |
| [09:14] | – Proctologist. – No, come on. | – 直肠病医生 – 不是的，算了吧 |
| [09:17] | No doctor would put that on his car. | 医生不会把这个放到自己车上的 |
| [09:19] | Have you ever met a proctologist? | 你有遇见过直肠病医生吗？ |
| [09:22] | Well, they usually have a very good sense of humor. | 嗯，他们通常都有很强的幽默感 |
| [09:25] | You meet a proctologist at a party, don’t walk away. | 如果你在一个聚会里遇到个直肠病医生 千万别走开 |
| [09:28] | Plant yourself there. You will hear the funniest stories you’ve ever heard. | 你就站定在那里 然后你会听到最有趣的故事 |
| [09:32] | See, no one wants to admit to them that they stuck something up there. | 看吧，没有人会承认 他们把一些东西卡在“那里”了 |
| [09:37] | Never. It’s always an accident. | 从来没有，那些永远都是意外 |
| [09:39] | Every proctologist’s story ends in the same way: | 每个直肠病医生讲的故事 都是这样结束的： |
| [09:42] | “It was a million-1 shot, doc. Million-1.” | “这是百万分之一的概率，医生 百万分之一” |
| [09:46] | There’s my phone. | 我的电话 |
| [09:50] | – So where you gonna stick this? – I’ll tell you where I’d like to stick it. | – 那你准备把这个插在哪？ – 我会告诉你我要把它插在哪的 |
| [09:56] | Hey, David. | 嘿，大卫 |
| [09:58] | Oh, hi, Jerry. | 啊，嗨，杰瑞 |
| [09:59] | Hey, what’s the story? I hear you’re doing my move. | 喂，怎么回事？ 我听说你在用我的技巧 |
| [10:02] | What move? | 什么技巧？ |
| [10:03] | What move? My move. The one I told you about. | 什么技巧？我的技巧 我告诉你的那个 |
| [10:05] | You used it on Elaine. | 你把它用在了伊莲身上 |
| [10:07] | What, are you kidding? I was doing that before I knew you. | 什么，你在开玩笑吧 在认识你之前我就这么做了 |
| [10:10] | – All you told me about was the end. – The ending is the whole thing. | – 你告诉我的仅仅是个结尾 – 那个结尾就是精华所在 |
| [10:13] | Without the ending, it’s nothing. You had nothing. | 没有那个结尾，它就什么都不是了 你就什么都不会了 |
| [10:15] | That ending was so obvious. I would’ve figured that out anyway. | 那个结尾太明显了 我自己早晚都能想出来的 |
| [10:19] | Didn’t need you to tell me that stupid twist. | 根本就不用你告诉我 那个愚蠢的扭动 |
| [10:21] | – Twirl. – Whatever, I don’t do it. | – 是旋转 – 无所谓，反正我不用 |
| [10:23] | – Yeah, I know. You do the pinch. – Yeah. That’s right. | – 是啊，我知道，你用拧的 – 嗯，对啊 |
| [10:25] | You can’t come up with your own stuff, so you steal other people’s? | 你自己想不出来技巧 所以你就偷用别人的？ |
| [10:28] | You’re nothing but a hack. | 你就是一个黑客 |
| [10:30] | Are you through, because I’ve gotta get back to work. | 你说完了吗？我要继续工作了 |
| [10:33] | I’ll tell you what I’ll do. | 我会告诉你我要怎么做 |
| [10:34] | If you wanna do it out of town, okay. But not in the city. | 你要想在别的地方用的话，没问题 但不要在这个城市里用 |
| [10:38] | The next time your car breaks down, take that out of town. | 下次你的车坏了，也拿到别的地方去吧 |
| [10:41] | – Fine. – Good. | – 好啊 – 好 |
| [11:01] | George! | 乔治！ |
| [11:04] | What are you doing? | 你在干什么！ |
| [11:08] | I’m… | 我在… |
| [11:10] | …you know… | 你知道的啊… |
| [11:12] | …pleasuring you. | 取悦你 |
| [11:14] | Well, stop it. | 好吧，别再这样了 |
| [11:18] | – You don’t like the move? – No, I don’t. | – 你不喜欢这个技巧？ – 不，我不喜欢 |
| [11:21] | – You’re kidding. – No, I’m not. | – 你在开玩笑吧 – 不，我没有 |
| [11:24] | It feels like aliens poking at my body. | 我觉得像外星人在戳我的身体 |
| [11:30] | Sorry. | 对不起 |
| [11:32] | I’ll just go back to my usual routine. | 我还是用回我平常的方法吧 |
| [11:38] | Oh, God. Oh, God, Dave! | 啊，天啊，啊，天啊，大卫！ |
| [11:41] | Oh, yes, yes. | 啊，好，好 |
| [11:43] | – I’m sorry. – What? | – 对不起 – 怎么了？ |
| [11:45] | I can’t do the move. | 我不能用那个技巧 |
| [11:47] | – What? – He’s ruined it for me. | – 什么？ – 他把那个技巧给我毁了 |
| [11:50] | – Oh, come on. Please? – No, he called me a hack. | – 啊，别这样，拜托 – 不行，他居然管我叫黑客 |
| [11:54] | I’m just not into doing it anymore. | 我再也不会用它了 |
| [11:57] | So that’s it? | 那就这样了？ |
| [12:00] | I’ll come up with some new stuff. | 我会想出新的技巧的 |
| [12:09] | “Call me. 36-24-46. I think I have what you’re looking for. “ | “打给我，36-24-46 我觉得我有你要找的东西” |
| [12:22] | I must caution you about one thing: | 我一定要警告你一件事： |
| [12:25] | You can’t cry for at least 10 days. You can ruin the operation. | 你至少10天不能哭 不然这手术就白做了 |
| [12:29] | Oh, okay. | 啊，好的 |
| [12:31] | Now, is someone coming to pick you up? | 现在有人来接你回去吗？ |
| [12:33] | Yes, my son’s friend should be here any minute. | 有，我儿子的朋友应该随时会到的 |
| [12:47] | – Can I help you? – Yeah, Dr. Cosmo Kramer. Proctology. | – 您有什么需要吗？ – 科兹莫・克莱默医生，直肠病学家 |
| [12:53] | – Okay. Sure, doctor. – Thanks. Have a good day. | – 好，没事了，医生 – 谢谢，祝你愉快 |
| [13:02] | I just can’t get over how fantastic you look. | 我简直不敢相信你看起来有多美 |
| [13:04] | – Oh, really? – Oh, yeah. | – 啊，真的吗？ – 是啊，真的 |
| [13:06] | This takes 20 years off. | 这让你年轻了20年 |
| [13:08] | And it was all done by laser. I don’t even need bandages. | 这手术完全是用激光做的 我甚至都不用扎绷带 |
| [13:12] | Yo, Assman. Look at the Assman. | 喂，大屁男，看，大屁男 |
| [13:15] | – Did he say, “Assman”? – Yeah. | – 他说“大屁男”吗？ – 是啊 |
| [13:18] | Oh, my goodness. | 啊，我的天啊 |
| [13:21] | – Hey, the Assman’s in town. – You got that straight. | – 喂，大屁男在城里啊 – 你说得对 |
| [13:24] | Boy, I never dreamed it could make such a difference. | 孩子，我做梦都没想过 这会有这么大差别 |
| [13:43] | Well, you must have done something wrong. | 好吧，你肯定做错了一些事 |
| [13:46] | You probably screwed up the order. Did you close with the swirl? | 你可能搞乱了顺序 你是用旋转结束的吗？ |
| [13:50] | You’re supposed to close with the swirl? | 你说的是以旋转结束吗？ |
| [13:53] | Oh, my God. Yes, you close with the swirl. | 啊，我的天啊 是的，你要用旋转结束 |
| [13:56] | There’s a progression there. I told you to write it down. | 那是有步骤的 我叫你写下来的啊 |
| [14:00] | Yeah, yeah. Should’ve written it down. | 是，是，我应该写下来的 |
| [14:05] | – Yeah? – Elaine. | – 喂？ – 伊莲 |
| [14:06] | All right. | 好 |
| [14:07] | Do me a favor. Don’t even do the move anymore. | 帮我个忙，别再用那个技巧了 |
| [14:10] | You’re gonna give it a bad name. | 你会毁掉它的声誉的 |
| [14:12] | Hello. | 喂 |
| [14:14] | Yeah, this is Jerry Seinfeld. | 是，我是杰瑞・宋飞 |
| [14:16] | What? $2800? | 什么？$2800？ |
| [14:20] | That’s the estimate on my car? | 这是维修费的估算？ |
| [14:22] | No, don’t even do anything. | 不，什么事都别做 |
| [14:25] | I’m gonna think about it. Okay, bye. | 我要再想想，好，再见 |
| [14:28] | What’s to think about? Puddy’s not gonna cheat you. | 你还要想什么啊？帕蒂不会骗你的 |
| [14:32] | – Except it’s not Puddy. – What happened to Puddy? | – 但那个不是帕蒂 – 帕蒂怎么了？ |
| [14:34] | We had a fight about the move. I took it to this other place. | 我们昨天为那个技巧吵了一架 我把车拿到别的地方去了 |
| [14:37] | – I think they’re trying to screw me. – Of course they’re trying to screw you. | – 我觉得他们想占我便宜 – 他们当然会去占你便宜 |
| [14:41] | That’s what they do. They can make up anything. | 他们就是那样做的 他们可以虚构任何问题 |
| [14:43] | Nobody knows. | 没有人会知道的 |
| [14:44] | “By the way, you need a new Johnson rod in here.” | “顺便说一句 你这里需要个新的约翰逊牌横杆” |
| [14:47] | “Oh, Johnson rod? Yeah, well, better put one of those on.” | “啊，约翰逊牌横杆？ 好吧，那最好还是装一根吧” |
| [14:53] | – Hey, Elaine. – Yeah, yeah, hello. | – 喂，伊莲 – 好，好，你好啊 |
| [14:57] | – Was it something I said? – Yes, as a matter of fact. | – 我说错了什么吗？ – 是啊，事实就是 |
| [15:00] | David Puddy won’t do the move anymore. | 大卫・帕蒂再也不会用那个技巧了 |
| [15:02] | Really? | 真的吗？ |
| [15:04] | He’s come up with some other move. You should see this thing. | 他想出了一些其他的技巧 你真应该看看 |
| [15:08] | – What is it? – It’s a lot of just fancy stuff. | – 怎么了？ – 就是有很多奇特的东西啊 |
| [15:12] | You know what it’s like? | 你知道那像什么吗？ |
| [15:13] | It’s like big-budget movie with a story that goes nowhere. | 就像一部大片，你却看不懂 它到底想说什么 |
| [15:20] | I mean, this move is no good, Jerry. It’s just taking up a lot of my time. | 杰瑞，那个电影可不怎么滴 而且还浪费了我这么多时间 |
| [15:23] | And I will not stand by and allow him to perform this move on me… | 我不能就这样眼睁睁看着他 白白放着一个完美的技巧不用… |
| [15:29] | …while a perfectly good move is just sitting in the barn doing nothing. | 却把那种技巧用在我身上 |
| [15:35] | Let me ask you a question. This new move… | 我问你个问题 这个新技巧… |
| [15:38] | …is there a knuckle involved in any way? | 有没有用到指节？ |
| [15:42] | Yes. Yes, as a matter of fact there is. | 是，是，事实就是这样的 |
| [15:45] | I think that’s mine. | 我想那是我的技巧 |
| [15:49] | I’m not surprised. | 我一点也不惊讶 |
| [15:52] | Listen, I need you to do me a favor. | 听着，我想你帮我个忙 |
| [15:54] | When’s the next time you’re gonna see him? | 你下次见他是什么时候？ |
| [15:56] | – Why? – Get an estimate on my car from him. | – 怎么了？ – 帮我估算下我车子的维修费 |
| [15:59] | This garage is trying to screw me. | 这个修车库想占我便宜 |
| [16:01] | An estimate? How am I supposed to do that? | 估算？我怎么做得到啊？ |
| [16:03] | Look, here’s the work order with everything that broke. | 看，这就是工作单 上面写了哪里坏了的 |
| [16:06] | Just kind of bring it up at the right time and find out. | 只要找个合适的时间说出来就知道了 |
| [16:10] | What? What is this? | 什么？这是什么啊？ |
| [16:13] | That’s fusilli Jerry. | 这是螺丝粉杰瑞 |
| [16:16] | – Fusilli Jerry? – Yeah, Kramer made it. | – 螺丝粉杰瑞？ – 对，克莱默做的 |
| [16:20] | – All right, listen, I’ll see you guys later. – All right. | – 好了，听着，我晚点再来找你们 – 好 |
| [16:23] | – Hey, Assman. – Hey. | – 喂，大屁男 – 喂 |
| [16:28] | – Well, this is Sally. – Hello. | – 嗯，这位是莎莉 – 你好 |
| [16:31] | – Hi. | – Hi. – 你好 – 你好 |
| [16:32] | – Shall we go? All right. – Okay. | – 我们走吧? 好 -好啊 |
| [16:43] | You can’t face the fact that I’m improving myself. | 你都不能正视我在自我完善的事实 |
| [16:47] | You’re not the only one improving yourself. | 你不是唯一一个自我完善的人 |
| [16:49] | I worked out with a dumbbell yesterday. | 我昨天用哑铃健身了 |
| [16:51] | I feel vigorous. | 我觉得精力充沛 |
| [16:54] | Just take your mail and go home. I have things to do. | 拿了你的信就回家吧 我还有事要做呢 |
| [16:58] | I got things to do too. | 我也有事要做啊 |
| [17:00] | Don’t upset me. I can’t cry! | 别烦我，我现在不能哭！ |
| [17:05] | Getting an eye job like some Manhattanite, huh? | 像曼哈顿人一样做眼睛手术吗，嗯？ |
| [17:08] | Well, it’s already working. Kramer made a pass at me. | 嗯，这已经起作用了 克莱默向我调情了 |
| [17:11] | Kramer made a pass at you? You’re crazy. | 克莱默向你调情？你疯了 |
| [17:14] | I’m not crazy. He stopped short and made a grab. | 我没有疯 他突然刹车，然后顺手一抓 |
| [17:18] | He stopped short? That’s my move. | 他突然刹车？那是我的技巧 |
| [17:22] | I’m gonna kill him. | 我要宰了他 |
| [17:30] | – Hey, let me ask you a question. – Sure. | – 喂，我问你个问题 – 问吧 |
| [17:34] | What do you charge for blown shocks? | 减震器异响你收多少钱？ |
| [17:36] | – What? – Two-, 300? | – 什么？ – 200，还是300？ |
| [17:40] | I don’t know, maybe 500. | 我不清楚，也许500吧 |
| [17:52] | – What about a bad gasket? – Bad gasket? | – 如果是个坏的密封垫呢？ – 坏的密封垫？ |
| [17:55] | Yeah, like a terrible gasket. | 是啊，就是一个破烂的密封垫 |
| [18:00] | – What is all this? – Nothing, nothing. | – 你问这些干什么？ – 没事，没事 |
| [18:02] | I’m just taking an interest in what you do. | 我只是对你做的事感兴趣 |
| [18:07] | What kind of car is it? | 那是什么样的车啊？ |
| [18:10] | Any kind of a Swedish car. | 随便一种瑞典车 |
| [18:14] | All together that could run about 1600. | 加起来大概一共1600吧 |
| [18:20] | Is that with the parts and labor? | 这里面包括零件费和人工费吗？ |
| [18:26] | No. Dave, no, please. Not the knuckle. | 不，大卫，不，拜托 别用指节 |
| [18:33] | Well… | 嗯… |
| [18:36] | …that was great. | 这太棒了 |
| [18:40] | I mean… | 我的意思是… |
| [18:45] | It just came to me. | 我很自然地想到了 |
| [18:48] | I’ve never in my life… I’ve… What was that? | 我一生中从来没有…我… 那是什么啊？ |
| [18:55] | You mean in the end? | 你是说结束的时候？ |
| [18:58] | A counterclockwise swirl. | 逆时针旋转 |
| [19:01] | – What’s that? – What? | – 那是什么？ – 什么？ |
| [19:03] | – On your hand? Let me see. – Nothing. I don’t know. It’s a mole. | – 你手上那些？让我看看 – 没什么，我不知道，是胎记吧 |
| [19:06] | – Let me see. – Just a little dirt. | – 让我看看 – 就是有些脏了 |
| [19:07] | I wanna see what’s on your hand. Give me your hand. | 我要看看你手上的是什么 把手伸过来 |
| [19:10] | “Number one, take her leg…” | “第一，抓住她的腿…” |
| [19:12] | Oh, my God. Crib notes? You’ve got crib notes? | 啊，我的天啊，小抄？ 你还带小抄？ |
| [19:18] | It’s a very complicated move. I couldn’t remember it all. | 这是个很复杂的技巧，我记不全 |
| [19:22] | Oh, my God, you’re sick. | 啊，我的天啊，你太变态了 |
| [19:25] | You know, it’s not the SATs. | 喂，这又不是高考 |
| [19:37] | Assman? I’ll give him Assman! | 大屁男？我倒要让他屁股好看 |
| [19:44] | Sixteen hundred dollars? That’s all? | $1600？才这么少？ |
| [19:47] | They are ripping me off. | 他们果然在骗我 |
| [19:49] | – So, what are you gonna do? – That’s it. I’m going back to Puddy. | – 那你准备怎么做啊？ – 我要回帕蒂那去，就这样 |
| [19:52] | No move is worth this. | 这个比什么技巧都值 |
| [19:53] | You don’t care if he does the move anymore? | 如果他再用那个技巧你也不在乎了？ |
| [19:55] | Are you kidding? He could do every move I’ve ever done. | 你在开玩笑吗？ 他可以用任何一个我用过的技巧 |
| [19:58] | Do you know what a good mechanic is worth? You can’t compare that to sex. | 你知道一个好的修理工多难得吗？ 你根本不能拿性爱来跟他比 |
| [20:04] | – Hi, Mr. Costanza, what’s…? – Where’s your friend, Kramer? | – 你好，科森萨先生，有什么… – 你的朋友克莱默在哪？ |
| [20:07] | – I don’t know, why? – I’m looking for him, that’s why. | – 我不知道，怎么了？ – 不怎么，我正在找他 |
| [20:09] | – He stopped short. – What do you mean? | – 他突然刹车了 – 你想说什么啊？ |
| [20:12] | In the car with my wife. He stopped short. | 我妻子在他车里，他就突然刹车了 |
| [20:14] | You think I don’t know what that’s about? | 你以为我不知道那是在干什么吗？ |
| [20:16] | That’s my own move. I used it on Estelle 40 years ago. | 那是我的技巧 我40年前就用在诶斯特尔身上了 |
| [20:19] | I told everybody about it. Everybody knows… | 我对大家的都说过这个 人人都知道… |
| [20:22] | …I stop short. | 我会突然刹车的 |
| [20:24] | Really? Stopping short? That’s a good move. | 真的吗？突然刹车？ 那是个好技巧啊 |
| [20:27] | You’re not kidding it’s a good move. | 你说得对，这是个好技巧 |
| [20:30] | – Hey. – Hey, Frank. | – 喂 – 喂，弗兰克 |
| [20:32] | Don’t “Frank” me. I know what you did. How dare you stop short with my wife? | 别叫我弗兰克，我知道你做了什么 你居然敢对着我妻子突然刹车？ |
| [20:35] | Come on, Frank, relax. I don’t know what you’re talking about. | 别这样，弗兰克，冷静点 我完全不知道你在说什么 |
| [20:38] | You think I don’t know, Assman? | 你以为我什么都不知道吗，大屁男？ |
| [20:42] | To think I almost split the profits on the Mansiere with you. | 想想我差点让你从曼斯尔身上占便宜了 |
| [20:45] | – Bro. – Mansiere! | – 喂 – 曼斯尔！ |
| [20:46] | – Bro! – Mansiere! | – 喂！ – 曼斯尔！ |
| [20:54] | Oh, my God. | 啊，我的天啊 |
| [21:04] | If I wasn’t there, I wouldn’t have believed it. | 如果我不在那 我根本不会相信发生这种事 |
| [21:07] | Me either. | 我也不会 |
| [21:09] | They say this guy’s the best. | 他们说这个医生是最好的 |
| [21:13] | He had to use corkscrew pasta. | 他只能把螺旋形的面食拔出来了 |
| [21:26] | Jerry, Jerry, come here. Take a look at this. | 杰瑞，杰瑞，过来 来看看这个 |
| [21:28] | The name on the boat. Look at it. | 船上的名字，快看 |
| [21:31] | – Assman! – Yeah, he’s the Assman. | – 大屁男！ – 对，他就是那个大屁男！ |
| [21:34] | Jerry, he’s the Assman. | 杰瑞，他就是那个大屁男 |
| [21:36] | – Which one is the son? – I am. | – 哪位是他的儿子 – 我是 |
| [21:38] | I’m Dr. Cooperman. | 我是库伯曼医生 |
| [21:40] | I just want you to know that this won’t take long and he’s going to be fine. | 我只是想告诉你他很快就会好起来的 |
| [21:45] | Excuse me, you didn’t by any chance recently get the wrong license plates? | 打扰一下 你最近是不是拿错了车牌照 |
| [21:51] | Yes, I’m still waiting for the Motor Vehicle Bureau to straighten it out. | 是啊，我还在等 机动车辆管理局解决呢 |
| [21:55] | So you’re the Assman. | 那你是那个屁股男吧？ |
| [22:01] | Million- 1 shot, doc. Million- 1. | 百万分之一的概率，医生 百万分之一 |
| [22:17] | Where have you been? You were supposed to fix the stove. | 你去哪里了啊？ 你应该把炉子修好的 |
| [22:21] | I’ve been waiting for hours. | 我已经等了几个小时了 |
| [22:23] | I fell on some fusilli. | 我摔在螺丝粉上了 |
| [22:26] | – Fusilli? – You know, the corkscrew pasta. | – 螺丝粉？ – 嗯，就是那种螺旋形的面食 |
| [22:30] | It was a fusilli Jerry. | 那是个螺丝粉杰瑞 |
| [22:33] | It got stuck in me. I had to go to the proctologist. | 它卡在我身体里了 我只好去看直肠病医生了 |
| [22:37] | The proctologist? Are you okay? | 直肠病医生？你还好吗？ |
| [22:40] | – Yeah. – Oh, I was so worried. | – 还好 – 啊，我好担心你啊 |
| [22:43] | – Ma, don’t cry! – Oh, I can’t help it! | – 妈，别哭！ – 啊，我忍不住！ |
| [22:45] | Ma, your eyes! | 妈，你的眼睛！ |