| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:00] | My relationship with my phone is pretty serious. | 我跟我的手机关系十分密切 |
| [00:03] | I eat… | 我用它吃饭 |
| [00:07] | …sleep… | 睡觉 |
| [00:09] | And breathe it. | 甚至对着它呼吸 |
| [00:15] | It keeps me level. | 它让我保持水平 |
| [00:17] | But my coworker Henry believes that being so close to my phone | 可我的同事亨利认为 跟手机走得太近 |
| [00:19] | is what’s keeping me from being close to non-phones, | 影响了我近距离接触其他非手机物体 |
| [00:22] | like people, so I’ve been making more of an effort to — | 比如人类 因此我更加努力地… |
| [00:24] | Good morning, Eliza. | 早啊 伊莉莎 |
| [00:26] | Good morning, Henry. | 早 亨利 |
| [00:28] | How are you today? | 今天怎么样 |
| [00:29] | I didn’t really care how he was today, | 我可不在乎他怎么样 |
| [00:31] | but I had learned to ask anyway. | 但我学会了 还是要问候一下 |
| [00:32] | I’m quite well. Thank you for asking. | 我很好 感谢关心 |
| [00:34] | I had a, uh, protein-rich breakfast | 我今天吃了蛋白早餐 |
| [00:36] | that I ingested outside, in the garden. | 在屋外花园享用 |
| [00:38] | The weather was quite mild. | 天气很好 |
| [00:40] | Watched an episode of “Bones” on the treadmill. | 在跑步机上看了一集《识骨寻踪》 |
| [00:42] | Then I broke out some new bath products | 然后用了一些我一直想试的 |
| [00:44] | I’ve been meaning to try. | 洗浴用品 |
| [00:45] | Yeah, it was rosemary… | 是迷迭香… |
| [00:46] | Henry says maintaining eye contact | 亨利说 保持眼神交流 |
| [00:47] | makes people think you’re listening to them, | 会让别人觉得你在认真倾听 |
| [00:49] | even if what you’re really thinking about | 即使你其实在想 |
| [00:51] | is whether or not Jay and Beyonce have a pre-nup. | Jay-Z和碧昂斯有没有签婚前协议 |
| [00:53] | What are your thoughts on that? | 你觉得呢 |
| [00:55] | Of course they have a pre-nup. | 当然签了婚前协议 |
| [00:56] | There’s a billion dollars on the elevator! | 电梯里有十亿美元呢[碧昂斯歌词] |
| [00:58] | I see. | 我知道了 |
| [00:59] | Well, good job pretending to listen. | 话说你装得很像嘛 |
| [01:01] | And why don’t I hold on to your phone for the staff meeting? | 员工大会期间 不如让我替你保管手机 |
| [01:04] | Sure. | 行 |
| [01:04] | Let me just, uh… | 先让我… |
| [01:10] | All yours. | 交给你啦 |
| [01:11] | You could’ve just said no. | 你直接拒绝不就行了吗 |
| [01:15] | Team, take a look around you. | 各位 环顾一下四周 |
| [01:18] | What do you see? | 你们看到了什么 |
| [01:21] | Windows? | 窗户 |
| [01:21] | Todd from accounting. | 陶会计 |
| [01:23] | Bagels? | 百吉饼 |
| [01:24] | Dark? Darkness? | 黑暗 一片漆黑 |
| [01:26] | Endless night? | 无尽的黑夜 |
| [01:27] | I see a family. | 我看到的是一家人 |
| [01:29] | A publicly held children’s pharmaceutical family. | 上市儿童药物公司一家人 |
| [01:33] | The more connected our family is, | 正所谓家和 |
| [01:35] | the more our business will thrive. | 万事才能兴旺繁荣 |
| [01:39] | Joan is about to distro an article | 琼要给大家发一篇文章 |
| [01:40] | that will show us how to increase coworker connectivity. | 教大家怎样增强员工凝聚力 |
| [01:43] | Joan? | 琼 |
| [01:46] | 点点滴滴 最性感的男人如何与妻子心连心 | |
| [01:47] | Sir, I think I’ve got the wrong article. | 先生 我是不是拿错文章了 |
| [01:49] | This is, uh, an interview with Channing Tatum. | 这是钱宁·塔图姆的采访稿 |
| [01:51] | And I know what you’re thinking — | 我知道你在想什么 |
| [01:52] | What does “Magic Michael” have to teach me? | 魔力麦克有什么可教我的 |
| [01:55] | The answer, my friend, is everything. | 我的伙伴 答案是 一切 |
| [01:57] | Uh, I-I’m sorry. | 不好意思 |
| [01:58] | He and his wife rate how close they feel to one another | 他跟他老婆互相根据亲密程度打分 |
| [02:00] | on a scale of 1 to 10? | 满分10分 |
| [02:02] | Let’s try it out. | 咱们也来试试 |
| [02:03] | Larry, I want you to cup Henry’s face in your hand… | 拉里 双手捧住亨利的脸 |
| [02:06] | I don’t see anything about cup– hmm. | 这里可没说要捧着… |
| [02:08] | …look him in the eye | 直视他的眼睛 |
| [02:10] | And tell him, on a scale of 1 to 10, | 告诉他 满分10分 |
| [02:11] | how close you feel to him right now. | 你觉得你跟他有多亲密 |
| [02:16] | I’m feeling a 9. | 我觉得是9分 |
| [02:17] | Wally-kazam! | 棒棒哒 |
| [02:19] | Linda, how are you feeling about Raj from H.R.? Huh? | 琳达 你对人资部的拉杰是什么感觉 |
| [02:24] | I’ll go with a 5. | 5分吧 |
| [02:26] | I mean, he seems nice, | 他看起来人不错 |
| [02:28] | but he’s only been here a few weeks. | 但毕竟才来了几周而已 |
| [02:30] | “Seems nice.” | 看起来人不错 |
| [02:31] | That’s an excellent start, Raj. | 开局顺利哟 拉杰 |
| [02:35] | I feel an 8 for Joan. | 我觉得琼是8分 |
| [02:38] | She’s very helpful, | 她帮了我不少 |
| [02:39] | and I like that she packs her own lunch from home, | 她自己从家里带饭 这很好 |
| [02:42] | because I do that, too. | 因为我也这么做 |
| [02:43] | Huzzah! | 好嘞 |
| [02:44] | Raj sees himself in Joan. | 拉杰在琼身上看到了自己 |
| [02:47] | Come on. What more could you ask for? | 此生足矣夫复何求啊 |
| [02:50] | I give Eliza a zero. | 我给伊莉莎零分 |
| [02:55] | But she probably won’t notice, because, as always, | 不过她应该没注意到 因为 |
| [02:57] | she’s too busy staring at her phone. | 她一直在忙着玩手机没空管别的 |
| [03:04] | Wait. What’d I miss? | 等等 我错过了什么 |
| [03:05] | The point, I’m afraid. | 恐怕是错过了重点 |
| [03:35] | What the hell was that in there? | 刚才是什么情况 |
| [03:37] | And what are you doing eating lunch over a trash can? | 还有 你怎么对着垃圾桶吃午饭 |
| [03:39] | I digest better standing up. | 站着更好消化 |
| [03:40] | That is really antisocial behavior. | 你这行为简直反社会 |
| [03:42] | Joan just gave you a zero in that meeting. Are you not concerned? | 琼刚才在会上给你打零分 你就不在意吗 |
| [03:45] | Yeah! | 对呀 |
| [03:46] | But Joan is never gonna like me, so…pfft. | 不过琼肯定不会待见我 所以算了吧 |
| [03:48] | Maybe ’cause you’re always on your phone. | 也许是因为你老玩手机 |
| [03:51] | Or maybe it’s because I have | 或许是因为我拥有 |
| [03:52] | perfectly symmetrical features and hair like Ariel. | 完美对称的体型 和小美人鱼般的秀发 |
| [03:56] | Or maybe it’s because of what happened with the gazpacho. | 也许是因为那次酸辣汤的事 |
| [04:00] | What happened with the gazpacho? | 酸辣汤怎么了 |
| [04:03] | I’d just come from and early-moring SoulCycle class | 我早上健身课结束后 |
| [04:05] | and forgotten to eat breakfast, | 忘了吃早餐 |
| [04:07] | so when I got to the office, it hit me — | 到了办公室才发现 |
| [04:09] | I was really, really, really, | 我真的真的 |
| [04:11] | super-super-duper hunggs. | 超级超级超级”殍” |
| [04:14] | “Hunggs”? | 殍 |
| [04:15] | As in, like, famished. | 就是要饿死了 |
| [04:17] | So I was about to legit pour myself a bowl of banana peppers | 就在我准备给自己倒一碗腌香蕉椒之时 |
| [04:20] | when I spotted it. | 忽然发现了美味 |
| [04:36] | Don’t tell Joan. | 别告诉琼 |
| [04:38] | I am Joan. | 我就是琼 |
| [04:41] | Eliza, Joan is Sam Saperstein’s right-hand woman. | 伊莉莎 琼是山姆老板的得力助手 |
| [04:44] | She wields a lot of power at this company. | 她在公司里权力可大着呢 |
| [04:46] | You should know who she is. | 你应该知道她是谁 |
| [04:48] | And you should not eat her gazpacho | 而且你不能偷喝他的酸辣汤 |
| [04:49] | or any of her carefully labeled foodstuffs. | 以及她精心写上名字的任何食物 |
| [04:52] | Okay. Okay. | 好吧 好吧 |
| [04:56] | Your next assignment is to befriend Joan. | 你接下来的任务就是 跟琼成为好友 |
| [05:00] | I’m telling you — it’ll never work. | 我告诉你 这没用的 |
| [05:02] | Joan is a miraclesuit, | 琼就是连体泳衣 |
| [05:04] | and I am a monokini with side-boob and hipbone cutouts. | 而我是比基尼 胸部侧露 胯骨也露 |
| [05:07] | We’re complete opposites. | 我们是完全相反的人 |
| [05:09] | Same could be said of me and Larry. | 我跟拉里也是啊 |
| [05:10] | But… | 可是 |
| [05:12] | Larry’s not a monokini. | 拉里才不是比基尼 |
| [05:13] | No, in this scenario, I am the monokini. | 不 在这种情况下 我是比基尼 |
| [05:15] | No, you would be one of those old-timey long-sleeved bathing costumes. | 不 你应该是老式长袖泳衣 |
| [05:18] | My differences with Larry | 我跟拉里不同 |
| [05:19] | don’t prevent me from connecting with him. | 但并不影响我跟他搞好关系 |
| [05:21] | Observe. | 看好了 |
| [05:22] | Larry. | 拉里 |
| [05:23] | – Hiya, Henry. – Hey, hey, smells good. | -你好呀 亨利 -嘿 挺香的嘛 |
| [05:25] | – Yeah, chili and cheese. – I love it. | -辣椒和奶酪 -我超爱 |
| [05:27] | How’s the wife? | 你老婆怎么样 |
| [05:28] | Oh, difficult. But I knew that when I married her. | 很难搞 不过结婚的时候我就已经知道了 |
| [05:34] | The old ball and chain. | 老婆嘛 都这样 |
| [05:35] | Oh, you’re telling me. | 可不是嘛 |
| [05:36] | It is what it is. | 本色难改 |
| [05:38] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [05:39] | Well, catch you later. | 有空再聊 |
| [05:40] | See you, bud. | 再见哥们 |
| [05:44] | Now you try it with Joan. | 你试试跟琼聊聊 |
| [05:45] | Ugh! Okay, fine. | 好吧 |
| [05:47] | Hey, Joan. | 琼 |
| [05:49] | How’s the sandwich? | 三明治好吃吗 |
| [05:50] | I wouldn’t know. | 我怎么知道 |
| [05:52] | Someone stole my sandwich, took two bites, | 有人偷了我的三明治 吃了两口 |
| [05:53] | and threw it in the trash. | 然后扔到垃圾桶里了 |
| [05:56] | Sucks. | 太不给力了 |
| [05:57] | Like your husband. Am I right? | 跟你老公一样 对吧 |
| [05:59] | The old ball and… | 老蛋蛋和… |
| [06:01] | penis. | 丁丁 |
| [06:12] | – But I did what you did. – No, you did not. | -我照着你来的呀 -才不是 |
| [06:14] | I did not reference Larry’s wife’s genitals. I did not. | 我可没有提到拉里老婆的生殖器官 并没有 |
| [06:18] | I took my cues from Larry, | 我看拉里的脸色行事 |
| [06:19] | whereas you were completely tone-deaf. | 而你完全不懂察言观色 |
| [06:21] | Oh, well. | 好吧 |
| [06:22] | No, not “Oh, well.” | 不要说”好吧” |
| [06:23] | Try again. Do your research. | 再试一次 好好调查调查 |
| [06:25] | If you want to connect with Joan, | 如果你想跟琼搞好关系 |
| [06:27] | find out what her interests are. | 先看看她的兴趣是什么 |
| [06:29] | Who she be with! | 她跟谁一起[歌词] |
| [06:32] | Never mind. | 当我没说 |
| [06:33] | I can do this. | 我可以的 |
| [06:34] | After all, cybersleuthing is kind of my forte. | 毕竟人肉搜索是我的专长 |
| [06:37] | And if I can find out the true length of CeeLO’S arms, | 我连Cee-Lo的胳膊到底有多长都能搜到 |
| [06:39] | I can def find out some dirt on Joan. | 挖点琼的料绝对没问题 |
| [06:42] | Charmonique, help. | 夏莫妮卡 求助 |
| [06:44] | I spent the whole night trying to get to know Joan, | 我一整晚都想了解琼 |
| [06:46] | but she’s an internet ghost. | 但她简直就是网上的幽灵 |
| [06:48] | I went to MySpace and back and got Jack. | 我在MySpace搜了个遍都没有 |
| [06:49] | Apparently, she’s facebook-free, | 脸书她也不上 |
| [06:51] | a twitter-quitter, insta-invisible. | 推特 Instagram都没有 |
| [06:53] | I’m telling you, it’s like… | 我给你说 简直是 |
| [06:55] | It’s just like Joan doesn’t even exist. | 就好像琼这个人根本不存在一样 |
| [06:57] | Baby girl, you are looking in all the wrong places. | 亲爱的 你找错地方了 |
| [07:00] | Joan doesn’t do social media. | 琼不上社交网站 |
| [07:02] | But she is all up on yelp. | 不过在大众点评可是很活跃呢 |
| [07:06] | In fact, she’s a super reviewer. | 而且 她是个点评狂人 |
| [07:09] | Oh, my God! This is crazy. | 我的天 太疯狂了 |
| [07:11] | There are thousands of reviews here. | 有上千条点评 |
| [07:13] | Wow, she really has it in for the Simi Valley galleria… | 她跟西米谷广场是有仇啊 |
| [07:16] | …”whose food court is sorely lacking a Wetzel’s.” | “真可悲 那里的美食街少一家椒盐饼店” |
| [07:20] | Those mini dog-bites, though! | 那些小狗饼干嘛 |
| [07:23] | But look — five stars for Miss Mandy’s | 看这个 五星好评 |
| [07:25] | Friday-night “Straight up now tone me” cardio class. | 曼迪小姐家周五晚上的”塑我吧”有氧健身课 |
| [07:28] | “I never miss it.” | “我周周必去” |
| [07:29] | Are you thinking what I’m thinking? | 你现在跟我想的一样吗 |
| [07:31] | That old white ladies | 那个白老女人 |
| [07:32] | need to stop co-opting a sister’s skills | 还是放弃折腾吧 |
| [07:34] | in a futile attempt to turn their caucasian non-booties | 别妄想把自己的白人小屁股变翘臀了 |
| [07:37] | into juicy doubles? | 没用的 |
| [07:38] | Yes. | 对 |
| [07:39] | But also, it’s Friday. | 不过 是在周五 |
| [07:41] | I’m gonna take that class! | 我也要去上这个课 |
| [07:50] | Oh, my! | 天呐 |
| [07:50] | I’m s– Larry, I’m so sorry! | 拉里 不好意思 |
| [07:53] | You scared me. | 你吓到我了 |
| [07:54] | Hot tea can’t hurt me now. | 热茶已经伤不了我了 |
| [07:56] | Ah. Actually, it can. | 好吧其实挺疼的 |
| [07:58] | But not as much as what Nancy did. | 但这点伤害跟南希的所为相比算什么 |
| [08:00] | Nancy? | 南希 |
| [08:00] | The old ball and chain. | 那个老累赘 |
| [08:02] | She ended it. It’s over. | 她提出来了 我们结束了 |
| [08:04] | No. What happened? | 不是吧 怎么回事 |
| [08:07] | I’m going to the chiropractor. | 我去做按摩了 |
| [08:09] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [08:12] | Unbelievable. | 真不可思议 |
| [08:13] | Well, I’m sorry, Nancy, but what’s the correct response | 不好意思 南希 那你说”我去做按摩了” |
| [08:16] | to “I’m going to the chiropractor”? | 正确的回答应该是什么 |
| [08:17] | Should I hire a marching band? | 难道让我请个游行乐队吗 |
| [08:20] | – You really called that one, huh? – I did? | -真被你说中了 -我说的吗 |
| [08:22] | “It is what it is.” I mean, you were spot-on. | “本色难改” 你说得太对了 |
| [08:25] | But that’s just a phrase. It doesn’t mean anything. | 那只是随便说说 没什么实际意义 |
| [08:26] | But we’re both bachelors now, Juan Pablo. | 现在咱俩都单身了 阮·帕布洛 |
| [08:28] | I don’t know who that is. | 不知道是何方神圣 |
| [08:29] | Should we hit the nudie bars? The dog track? Head to T.J.? | 要不要去裸体酒吧 去提华纳逛逛 |
| [08:32] | Oh! Oh, oh! Do you want to “Wolf of wall street” it? | 对了 要不要来一出《华尔街之狼》 |
| [08:34] | I have a fully stocked lab downstairs. | 楼下实验室里应有尽有 |
| [08:35] | We could freebase some infant aspirin | 我们可以吸点儿婴儿阿司匹林 |
| [08:37] | and then go kill a drifter! | 然后杀个流浪汉 |
| [08:38] | Let me see how the rest of my day is looking. | 我先查查我的日程安排 |
| [08:40] | Let me get back to you. I promise — | 等我联系你 一定 |
| [08:43] | Uh, you have a call at 1:45 | 你1:45有一个电话 |
| [08:45] | that you could probably take in the car on the way to T.J. | 不过你完全可以在去提华纳的路上打 |
| [08:50] | Thanks, Charlie. | 谢谢 查理 |
| [08:54] | Never love, Charlie. | 永远不要真心去爱 查理 |
| [08:56] | Uh, I won’t. | 不会的 |
| [08:59] | Armed with everything I learned on yelp, | 在点评网上深入学习之后 |
| [09:01] | I hit Joan’s dance class to see if I could increase | 我去了琼的舞蹈课 |
| [09:03] | my heart rate and my approval rating. | 看看能不能提高我的好评率和认可度 |
| [09:06] | Joan? Holy crap. | 琼 不勒个是吧 |
| [09:08] | Bitch-slap me all over my whole, entire face. | 乖乖里格隆地咚啊 |
| [09:11] | I cannot believe you go to this class. | 不敢相信你也上这个课 |
| [09:13] | I can’t believe you go to this class. | 我也不敢相信你来上这个课 |
| [09:15] | Are you kidding? | 开什么玩笑 |
| [09:16] | I love the crap out of | 我简直爱死了 |
| [09:17] | “Straight up now tone me” cardio. | “塑我吧”有氧舞蹈 |
| [09:19] | That’s how I keep it so tight. | 所以我的肌肉才如此紧实 |
| [09:21] | I’ve never seen you here before. | 我以前没见过你 |
| [09:23] | That is because i usually go to Mandy’s Saturday class…? | 因为我一般都上的是曼迪周六的课 |
| [09:25] | Uh, hey, Thottie! | 你好啊 托蒂 |
| [09:30] | So glad I made it on time. | 幸好及时赶来了 |
| [09:32] | I stopped to get gas at the, um, | 我刚才去给车加油 |
| [09:34] | the West Adams Chevron Station. | 在西亚当斯雪福龙加油站 |
| [09:37] | That’s the best one in Los Angeles. | 那可是洛杉矶最好的加油站 |
| [09:38] | I know — it’s right off the 10, 8 cents cheaper than inland, | 对呀 就在第十街道 比市里便宜8分钱 |
| [09:41] | plus their additives — | 而且他们的添加剂… |
| [09:41] | I feel the exact same way. | 我也这么认为 |
| [09:42] | I find the west adams location never crowded | 西亚当斯从来都不拥挤 |
| [09:44] | and their mini-mart well-appointed. | 购物店安排也比较合理 |
| [09:46] | Now, I will say that sometimes… | 不过有些时候 |
| [09:47] | The number on pump 7’s keypad stick? | 七号泵上的数字按键不好使 |
| [09:48] | – Yes, but if you… – Ask Rodriguez, the branch manager — | -是的 但如果 -告诉部门经理罗德里格斯 |
| [09:50] | – He will… – Wipe them down for you, | -他会… -帮你把数字清掉 |
| [09:52] | and that should alleviate the problem! | 这样就解决问题了 |
| [09:54] | Joan had warmed up during the warm-up, | 经过热身 琼的态度也不再冰冷 |
| [09:56] | but now we were heading into more complicated choreography. | 但接下来的舞蹈动作非常复杂 |
| [09:59] | And 5, 6, 7, here we go! | 五六七 走着 |
| [10:36] | Henry. Thank you for, uh, meeting with me… | 亨利 谢谢你来跟我… |
| [10:40] | in secret. | 秘密见面 |
| [10:42] | Yes, sir. | 客气 老板 |
| [10:42] | I firmly believe our corporate family | 我一直坚信我们公司这个大家庭 |
| [10:44] | has a responsibility to look out for one another, | 有责任照顾好每位成员 |
| [10:47] | and I’m worried — about Larry. | 说实话我有点担心拉里 |
| [10:51] | I am, too, sir. Uh — | 我也是 老板… |
| [10:52] | And I know how close the two of you are. | 我也知道你们俩很亲近 |
| [10:55] | I wouldn’t characterize us as, uh — | 我觉得我们之间没有… |
| [10:57] | He did give you a 9 on the Tatum/Dewan-Tatum scale. | 塔图姆亲密打分的时候他给你打了九分 |
| [11:00] | Yes, but — | 是 但是… |
| [11:01] | And I’m told the two of you microwave burritos together. | 我还听说你们俩一起用微波炉加热玉米卷吃 |
| [11:04] | N-no. One time, | 没有 就一次 |
| [11:06] | I stood near him while he microwaved a burrito. One time. | 他去加热玉米卷时我刚好在他旁边 就一次 |
| [11:08] | Then you should have no problem standing by him | 那在目前这一艰难的时刻 你一定也可以 |
| [11:11] | during this troubling time. | 支持他帮助他对吧 |
| [11:14] | His wife has left him, Henry. | 他妻子离开他了 亨利 |
| [11:17] | He’s gonna need his bestie now more than ever. | 现在他尤其需要自己的好哥们 |
| [11:23] | So, what is it that you would like me to do, sir? | 那你想让我做什么 老板 |
| [11:25] | It’s more what I don’t want you to do. | 是我不想让你做什么 |
| [11:28] | Don’t… | 不要… |
| [11:29] | not be there for him. | 不陪在他身边 |
| [11:34] | So…be there for him. | 那就是 陪在他身边 |
| [11:36] | And if he has nowhere to go… | 还有如果他没地方去… |
| [11:39] | Don’t not let him stay with you. | 不要不让他跟你住在一起 |
| [11:44] | So let him stay with me? | 也就是让他跟我一起住呗 |
| [11:46] | That’s a great idea. | 真是个好主意 |
| [11:49] | Very generous. | 你太大方了 |
| [11:50] | Oh, thank you. | 谢谢夸奖 |
| [11:52] | Man, you smell good. | 兄弟 你身上味道真好闻 |
| [11:59] | Joan! Joan! | 琼 琼 |
| [12:02] | Wait. | 等等 |
| [12:02] | You tore it up in there! | 刚才你太厉害了 |
| [12:04] | Your footwork during the breakdown was on point. | 似爪牙似魔鬼的步伐 简直酷炫 |
| [12:06] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [12:07] | You… | 你… |
| [12:09] | showed a lot of spirit. | 也是精神可嘉啊 |
| [12:10] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [12:11] | You know, I think Channing Tatum | 其实我觉得钱宁·塔图姆 |
| [12:13] | would be proud of us right now. | 现在都会为我们骄傲的 |
| [12:14] | Oh. R-right. | 是啊 |
| [12:15] | Listen, Joan, I know on several occasions, | 听我说 琼 我知道有那么几次 |
| [12:19] | I’ve accidentally eaten your belongings. | 我无意中吃了你的东西 |
| [12:21] | Those weren’t accidents. I label all my food. | 不是无意吧 我的东西上都有标注我的名字 |
| [12:24] | It was blatant disregard. | 你那是故意不尊重我 |
| [12:26] | Exactly. | 我知道 |
| [12:28] | So let me make it up to you by buying you dinner. | 那我今晚请你吃饭弥补一下吧 |
| [12:31] | Joan was on the fence, but I won her over with a… | 琼还犹豫不决的 可最终还是败给了我的 |
| [12:33] | Please? Please? A-please-please? | 好嘛 好嘛 好嘛 |
| [12:37] | Gracias, Juan Pablo. | 谢谢 阮·帕布洛 |
| [12:39] | Larry, I really wish you’d stop calling me that. | 拉里 我真心希望你别这么叫我了 |
| [12:41] | H-hey, it’s not jammie-time already, is it? | 话说现在还不到睡觉时间吧 |
| [12:44] | I don’t remember ordering the early-bird special. | 我可没有点早起套餐啊 |
| [12:46] | Larry — | 拉里 |
| [12:47] | Look, look. I’m wearing my party shirt. | 你看我把去参加派对的衬衣都穿上了 |
| [12:49] | Let’s hit the bars, have some drinks… | 我们去酒吧玩玩 喝喝酒… |
| [12:51] | Find some sisters. | 找几个妹子 |
| [12:52] | I’ll take the ugly one. | 丑的那个归我 |
| [12:53] | Really appreciate the offer, but I’ve had a long day. | 提议真心不错 但是我今天太累了 |
| [12:56] | I need to get some rest. So do you. | 我得去休息了 你也休息吧 |
| [12:58] | Good night, okay? | 晚安 好吗 |
| [13:00] | Ooh. I almost forgot. | 对了 差点忘了 |
| [13:01] | Don’t use the toilet in the guest bath– | 不要用客房的洗手… |
| [13:03] | She doesn’t know… | 她不知道… |
| [13:05] | How much…I need her. | 我有多么 需要她 |
| [13:11] | I know. | 我知道 |
| [13:14] | But you did hear me say | 但是你听到我刚才说 |
| [13:15] | not to use the toilet in the guest bathroom, right? | 不要用客房的洗手间了对不对 |
| [13:20] | Look, Larry, I’m a very solitary person, | 拉里 我这个人一向独居惯了 |
| [13:22] | and you… clearly, are not. | 而你 显然不是 |
| [13:24] | Are you sure you don’t want to try to make a run | 你确定真的不要想办法 |
| [13:26] | at getting Nancy back? | 让南希回来吗 |
| [13:28] | Maybe if you made some big, romantic gesture… | 或许如果你做点大型浪漫的事… |
| [13:31] | You mean like a flash mob? | 你是说像快闪那样的吗 |
| [13:32] | That’s not where my mind went, no. | 我不是这个意思 |
| [13:34] | Most women consider the flash mob | 大多数女人觉得 |
| [13:35] | to be the most romantic gesture a man can make — | 快闪是男人能做出的最浪漫的事 |
| [13:37] | second only to a surprise proposal on a jumbotron. | 仅次于在大屏幕上突然求婚 |
| [13:40] | Well, it sounds like you’ve done your research. | 你好像都做过调查研究了 |
| [13:42] | And I’m glad you’re being proactive. | 很高兴你这么积极主动 |
| [13:44] | Yeah. | 真的 |
| [13:44] | Well, let’s get some rest. | 那我们就休息吧 |
| [13:46] | Good night. | 晚安 |
| [13:49] | I don’t know if we can sleep. | 真的可以去睡觉吗 |
| [13:51] | We have so much planning to do. | 我们还有好多事要做呢 |
| [13:53] | Do you happen to own a tear-away suit? | 话说你有那种一秒变装的西服吗 |
| [13:54] | You know what? | 算了 |
| [13:55] | Don’t bother yourself. I’ll look. | 你不用麻烦了 我自己找吧 |
| [13:57] | Larry, I have a seasonal system with my wardrobe. | 拉里 我衣橱里的衣服是按季节分的 |
| [14:00] | The linens and the tweeds cannot be mixed — | 亚麻衣服和粗呢衣服不能混在一起… |
| [14:04] | Hello? | 喂 |
| [14:04] | Henry, guess where I am right now. | 亨利 你猜猜我现在在哪里 |
| [14:06] | Eliza, this is not a good time. | 伊莉莎 我现在没工夫 |
| [14:08] | Just guess! Guess! | 快猜嘛 快猜 |
| [14:09] | I’m not in the mood to play games. | 我现在没心情跟你玩游戏 |
| [14:10] | But I’m about to make some serious progress | 但是你安排给我的任务 我马上就要 |
| [14:12] | on the assignment you gave me. | 取得实质性进展了 |
| [14:13] | I’m outside Joan’s house. She’s inside with her husband. | 我现在在琼家门外面 她跟她丈夫在里面 |
| [14:16] | Did they see you? Just drive away. Drive away! | 他们看到你了吗 快开车走 快 |
| [14:18] | No, Henry. She invited me. | 不是 亨利 是她邀请我来的 |
| [14:21] | The research worked. I think she likes me. | 调查起作用了 她好像开始喜欢我了 |
| [14:23] | I just picked up pizza for the three of us to eat. | 我刚去买了披萨要三个人一起吃 |
| [14:25] | Oh, my God! It’s a pizza party! We’re having a pizza party. | 天哪 是披萨派对 我们要开披萨派对了 |
| [14:28] | J. Pabs, do you have any scissors? | 小帕布 你家里有剪子吗 |
| [14:31] | Never mind. | 算了 |
| [14:32] | I have to hang up now. | 我得先挂了 |
| [14:36] | Oh, goody. Is that the pizza? | 太好了 那是我们最爱的披萨吗 |
| [14:38] | White pizza from Geppetto’s — that’s our favorite. | 盖比特家的白披萨 我们的最爱 |
| [14:41] | Geppetto’s is the only | 盖比特家的白披萨 |
| [14:41] | white pizza in Los Angeles that travels well. | 是洛杉矶唯一一家长途跋涉不变质的 |
| [14:44] | Sunset Magazine voted it “Worth the trip.” | 日落杂志发起的投票结果是”再远也值得” |
| [14:46] | I tend to agree. | 我同意 |
| [14:49] | Wait! No! Scott! Don’t eat that! It has oregano! | 等等 斯格特 不要吃那个 里面有牛至 |
| [14:52] | Joan? | 琼 |
| [14:53] | Scott’s allergic to oregano, isn’t he? | 斯格特对牛至过敏对吧 |
| [14:55] | He certainly is. | 确实 |
| [14:57] | Scott? | 斯格特 |
| [14:59] | How did you know that? | 你怎么知道的 |
| [15:00] | Well, I thought — I thought I-I remembered — | 好像 我好像记得… |
| [15:02] | She’s saying “Scott’s allergic to oregano.” | 她说过什么”斯格特对牛至过敏” |
| [15:04] | Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on. | 等等 等等 |
| [15:07] | What’s directly across the street | 西亚当斯雪福龙加油站 |
| [15:08] | from the West Adams Chevron Station? | 街道对面是什么 |
| [15:12] | Answer! | 快回答 |
| [15:14] | 7-Eleven. | 7-11便利店 |
| [15:15] | Wrong. It’s been an empty lot for years. | 回答错误 那里已经空置很多年了 |
| [15:17] | Oh, dear God. | 苍天啊 |
| [15:19] | She’s been Yelp-stalking me. | 她一直在点评网跟踪我 |
| [15:21] | That’s how she found about Mandy’s class and Geppetto’s. | 所以她才发现了曼迪的舞蹈课还有盖比特披萨 |
| [15:23] | I don’t think that I can even finish this. | 这样一说我都没胃口吃完这块披萨了 |
| [15:28] | I can. | 还是吃完吧 |
| [15:30] | That pizza is topped with lies. | 那块披萨上浇的全是谎言 |
| [15:31] | But not oregano. | 但是没有牛至啊 |
| [15:35] | I’m sorry. | 对不起 |
| [15:37] | I’m sorry. I was just trying to get to know you. | 对不起 我只是想了解你 |
| [15:44] | For what it’s worth, I feel really bad. | 无论如何 我真的很过意不去 |
| [15:47] | I feel worse than the night Aaliyah died. | 我感觉比阿莉娅死时还难受 |
| [15:51] | Aaliyah died? | 阿莉娅死了 |
| [16:00] | Morning, Charmonique. | 早啊 夏莫妮卡 |
| [16:01] | Why are you wearing a breakaway suit? | 你为什么穿着可撕西装 |
| [16:05] | What? | 什么 |
| [16:05] | I can tell you’re wearing a breakaway suit. | 我能看出来你穿的是可撕西装 |
| [16:07] | I’m asking why. | 我问你原因 |
| [16:09] | Can you keep a secret? | 你能保密吗 |
| [16:10] | Please don’t tell me you’re doing a flash mob with Larry. | 你不会是要跟拉里一起去参加快闪吧 |
| [16:13] | How did you know that? | 你怎么知道的 |
| [16:14] | Do you have any idea | 你知道 |
| [16:15] | how many flash mobs Larry is responsible for? | 拉里组织了多少次快闪吗 |
| [16:18] | What? | 什么 |
| [16:18] | Half of the flash mobs on the internet are Larry-related. | 网上一半的快闪视频是都跟拉里有关的 |
| [16:21] | And it better not be for Nancy, because she hates them. | 你们最好不是为了南希 她最讨厌快闪了 |
| [16:24] | See? | 看到没 |
| [16:26] | Oh, God. | 天哪 |
| [16:27] | Look. This one’s from their anniversary. | 看 这个是他们结婚纪念日时候的 |
| [16:28] | 快闪激怒的女人 结婚纪念日庆祝失败 快闪激怒的女人 生日庆祝失败 快闪激怒的女人 惊天大败 快闪突袭 | |
| [16:30] | This one’s on her birthday. | 这是她生日时候的 |
| [16:32] | And this one — he catches Nancy off guard, | 还有这个 他吓了南希一跳 |
| [16:35] | she slips, throws her back out. | 结果她滑倒摔出去了 |
| [16:37] | Larry thinks a flash mob is gonna get his wife back. | 拉里认为快闪可以让她回来 |
| [16:39] | Nope. | 不会 |
| [16:40] | This is just another indication | 这只会说明 |
| [16:41] | that he doesn’t listen to Nancy or care about what she wants. | 他不听南希的话 不关心她的需要 |
| [16:45] | I’m gonna be stuck with him forever. | 那我就得永远跟他住一起了 |
| [16:48] | Oh, my…God. | 苍天 |
| [16:51] | I feel sick. | 好难受 |
| [16:56] | Charlie! | 查理 |
| [16:59] | Find Larry. The flash mob is off. | 去找拉里 快闪取消 |
| [17:01] | – But.. – But what? | -但是 -但是什么 |
| [17:02] | I’ll never get to do this. | 那我就没机会弄这个了 |
| [17:08] | Clean all this up. | 打扫干净 |
| [17:13] | First find Larry, then clean all this up. | 先找拉里 再打扫干净 |
| [17:16] | Okay. | 好 |
| [17:23] | I blew it. | 我搞砸了 |
| [17:24] | It was going so well, and then I messed it all up. | 开始一切顺利 可后来我就搞砸了 |
| [17:27] | Wait — w-w-what are you talking about? | 等等 你在说什么呢 |
| [17:29] | Joan. | 琼 |
| [17:31] | I told you it wouldn’t work. | 我早就说过那样没用的 |
| [17:33] | Well, you said it yourself — | 你自己不是说… |
| [17:34] | She’s a miraclesuit and you are a monokini. | 她是连体泳衣你是比基尼吗 |
| [17:36] | But the women in this office love miraclesuits. | 但是这办公室里的女人喜欢连体泳衣 |
| [17:38] | And they don’t love me because I’m a synthetic monokini | 他们不喜欢我是因为我的合成纤维比基尼 |
| [17:40] | made in a factory by a sweatshop baby. | 是血汗工厂里的童工制作的 |
| [17:42] | No offense to your family. | 无意冒犯你们家人 |
| [17:44] | My family owns a Buca di Beppo, but…still offended. | 我们家有一家布卡迪连锁餐厅 但还是冒犯了 |
| [17:48] | The — the truth of the matter is… | 其实这件事说实话… |
| [17:51] | I’m no better at office friendships than you are. | 论处理同事关系我做得并不比你好 |
| [17:53] | You? The great Henry the great? | 是吗 伟大的亨利大咖 |
| [17:56] | Listen, I made it seem like I was friends with Larry, | 听我说 我装作跟拉里是朋友 |
| [17:58] | when the truth is, I can’t spend 24 hours with that guy. | 但事实是 我没办法跟他24小时都待在一起 |
| [18:02] | And what he did to that drifter was wrong. | 而且他那样对那个流浪汉是不对的 |
| [18:04] | What did he do to the drifter? | 他对流浪汉做什么了 |
| [18:05] | And the only reason that I agreed | 今天我之所以同意 |
| [18:07] | to wear three breakaway suits to the office today… | 穿三件可撕西装来办公室… |
| [18:11] | is that I thought it would help me get rid of Larry, | 是因为我以为这样可以帮我摆脱拉里 |
| [18:13] | who I have learned | 我算是明白了 |
| [18:14] | is the most annoying person on planet Earth. | 他就是地球上最讨厌的人 |
| [18:17] | Hi, Larry. | 你好 拉里 |
| [18:18] | God. | 糟了 |
| [18:20] | Really? | 真的吗 |
| [18:21] | You know something, Henry? | 你知道吗 亨利 |
| [18:23] | I feel a zero for you right now. | 现在我给你零分 |
| [18:26] | A zero. | 零分 |
| [18:30] | You got the same as me. | 你现在跟我一样了 |
| [18:36] | Look, Larry, I-I’m sorry I lost my cool. | 听我说 拉里 抱歉我发脾气了 |
| [18:38] | I guess I’m overtired from not sleeping, | 应该是因为我昨晚整夜没睡 |
| [18:41] | cutting all my suits in half, | 忙着把西装剪开 |
| [18:42] | trying to learn dance choreography, | 忙着学习舞蹈编排 |
| [18:44] | and plunging my guest bathroom, | 忙着通客房洗手间 |
| [18:45] | which I specifically asked you not to use. | 我明确跟你说过不要用那个洗手间的 |
| [18:47] | But please believe me when I tell you — | 但是我下面说的话你一定要相信 |
| [18:49] | The flash mob is a bad idea. | 快闪这个主意真心不好 |
| [18:51] | If you want to get your wife back, | 如果你真想让你妻子回来 |
| [18:53] | it doesn’t require a ’90s dance track. | 根本不需要什么九十年代的舞曲 |
| [18:58] | A smaller gesture would mean more. | 一个小小的举动都会更有意义 |
| [19:09] | Uh, Henry would like to see you in his office. | 亨利让你去他办公室一趟 |
| [19:18] | Since it seems you’re still determined | 既然你还是那么坚定 |
| [19:20] | to eat lunch over a trash can, | 要对着垃圾桶吃午餐 |
| [19:21] | I had Charlie buy you that. | 我让查理给你买了个新的 |
| [19:23] | I kept the receipt. They had other designs. | 发票我没扔 款式不喜欢我可以去换 |
| [19:27] | It’s cute. | 挺可爱的 |
| [19:28] | Go ahead. Try it out. | 快试试吧 |
| [19:37] | It works. I like it. | 挺不错的 我喜欢 |
| [19:39] | Good job, Charlie. | 做得好 查理 |
| [19:40] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [19:48] | Is this your way of trying to get me to eat with you? | 你是想通过这种方式跟我一起吃饭吗 |
| [19:50] | Not with me — near me. | 不是跟我一起 是在我边上 |
| [19:51] | I know how important it is for your digestion | 我知道站着吃东西 |
| [19:53] | to eat standing up. | 对你的消化很重要 |
| [19:56] | Actually… | 其实… |
| [19:58] | That’s just an excuse I use | 那只是我找的借口而已 |
| [20:01] | because growing up, no one ever wanted to sit with me at lunch. | 因为从小到大 没人愿意跟我坐在一起吃午饭 |
| [20:05] | Now I’m just kind of used to it. | 现在我差不多都习惯了吧 |
| [20:07] | Well, in that case… | 那样的话… |
| [20:14] | Is this seat taken? | 这里没有别人吧 |
| [20:17] | When a friendship is real, you can feel it. | 交到真心朋友的时候 你是可以感觉到的 |
| [20:19] | And no disrespect to Channing Tatum, | 不是不尊重钱宁·塔图姆 |
| [20:22] | but it probably doesn’t need to be rated | 但是也许人与人之间根本不用 |
| [20:23] | on a scale of 1 to 10. | 从一到十打分 |
| [20:25] | Although if I were going to… | 不过如果要我打… |
| [20:27] | 6. | 6分 |
| [20:28] | 4.7 4.7. | |
| [20:30] | which rounds up to a 5. | 约等于5分 |
| [20:33] | Maybe we didn’t suck at office friendships after all. | 可能我们在处理同事关系上也不是一败涂地 |
| [20:38] | So, where do you want to eat dinner? | 那你想去哪里吃晚餐呢 |
| [20:40] | Your call. | 你说了算 |
| [20:54] | Raj, I canceled! | 拉杰 我不是取消了吗 |
| [20:55] | I-I swear, I canceled. | 真的 我取消了 |