| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:07] | Just think about it. | 想想看 |
| [00:09] | On Saturday, over a quarter-million people | 周六的时候 会有25万多人 |
| [00:12] | are gonna stream through that building. | 涌进那栋大楼 |
| [00:13] | A veritable who’s who of nobodies. | 名副其实的小爬虫大聚会 |
| [00:17] | Richard, we’ve tried marketing at trade shows. | 理查德 我们试过在展销会上推广 |
| [00:20] | We suck at it. | 我们糟透了 |
| [00:21] | No, I’m not talking about that. | 不 我说的不是那个 |
| [00:25] | Let me ask you this: | 我问你 |
| [00:26] | We need 120,000 phones, right? | 我们需要12万部手机 对吧 |
| [00:28] | What is the first thing | 人们进大楼后 |
| [00:31] | people do when they get in there? | 做的第一件事是什么 |
| [00:34] | Log on to free Wi-Fi. | 登免费无线网 |
| [00:37] | But Hooli makes you download | 但互利强迫你下载 |
| [00:39] | the Hoolicon app in order to sign in. | 互利大会应用后才能登陆 |
| [00:41] | So, what if we | 我们能不能 |
| [00:44] | somehow hack our code onto the app? | 黑了那个应用 植入我们的代码 |
| [00:48] | Then we will have our 120,000 phones all in one day. | 那样我们一天就能凑够12万部了 |
| [00:52] | I’m sorry. You’re– you’re talking about sneaking our code | 不好意思 你是说把我们的代码 |
| [00:55] | onto people’s phones without them even knowing about it? | 在别人毫不知情的情况下植入他们的手机吗 |
| [01:00] | I mean, that’s malware, Richard. | 这是恶意软件啊 理查德 |
| [01:01] | No. No, no, no. Think of it more as, um, | 不 不是 把它看作一种 |
| [01:04] | forced adoption through aggressive guerrilla marketing. | 逼迫用户使用的强势游击营销 |
| [01:07] | Well, as a product of forced adoption, | 我向你保证 你这么逼迫用户使用 |
| [01:09] | I can assure you there are consequences. | 肯定最后不得善终 |
| [01:12] | – I like it. – Well, hold on. | -我喜欢这主意 -等等 |
| [01:13] | Even if we get our code into that app and onto all those phones, | 即便我们把代码植入到应用以及那些手机里 |
| [01:17] | people are just gonna delete the app | 等会议一结束 |
| [01:18] | as soon as the conference is over. | 人们还是会把应用删掉的 |
| [01:20] | People don’t delete apps. | 人们才不删除应用 |
| [01:22] | I’m telling you. Get your phones out right now. | 我保证 把你们的手机拿出来 |
| [01:26] | Uh, Hipstamatic. | 我装了’模拟胶片’ |
| [01:27] | Vine, may she rest in peace. | 还有’急速视频’ 愿她安息 |
| [01:29] | – NipAlert? – McCain/Palin. | -我有’乳报’ -‘麦凯恩/佩林’ |
| [01:32] | All right, this works in theory, | 好吧 这理论上行得通 |
| [01:34] | but… penetrating the Hooli servers | 但…穿过互利的服务器 |
| [01:37] | to hack their shitty convention app? | 黑他们的垃圾会议软件 |
| [01:40] | We’d need a black hat ninja for this one. | 完成这个我们需要一个黑帽黑客 |
| [01:42] | I wonder where we can find someone like that. | 我在想到哪能找到这样的人 |
| [01:49] | No. | 不行 |
| [01:51] | It’s so great to see you, Mia. | 很高兴见到你 米娅 |
| [01:53] | – How’s Pakistan? – It’s so great. | -巴基斯坦怎么样 -太棒了 |
| [01:56] | I was there for a while, and as I said before, | 我在那待了一阵 如我之前所说 |
| [01:59] | I have to go back there right after this | 这事结束后 我还得 |
| [02:01] | for an extended period of time. | 回去再待很长一段时间 |
| [02:03] | Anyway, how’s all this stuff going? | 现在情况怎么样 |
| [02:05] | You must be, like, dying of boredom. | 你一定要无聊死了吧 |
| [02:08] | I am, but the terms of my plea agreement | 确实 但我的认罪协议禁止我 |
| [02:10] | forbid me to touch a computer or go online, so. | 碰电脑或上网 |
| [02:13] | Let me run a hypothetical by you, | 我拿你来做个假想试验 |
| [02:15] | just to, like, exercise your brain. | 就帮你活动活动脑筋 |
| [02:17] | Like, for instance, if I had to hack the Hooli app servers, | 比如 如果我想黑了互利的服务器 |
| [02:21] | mess with an app, and push it out over a venue’s free Wi-Fi… | 搞乱一款应用 然后通过免费无线推出去 |
| [02:24] | how would I do it? | 该怎么办 |
| [02:26] | It’s a trick question, right? | 你这问题暗藏玄机啊 |
| [02:27] | Because you wouldn’t hack the app server. | 因为你不是去黑应用的服务器 |
| [02:29] | You’d just launch a man-in-the-middle attack with Pineapples. | 只要用菠萝路由器发动中间人攻击 |
| [02:33] | Google it. Speaking of… | 自己查查吧 说到这个… |
| [02:37] | if they even catch me talking about this, | 如果他们抓到我哪怕只是说说这些 |
| [02:39] | they could send me to maximum security prison, | 他们会把我关到最高戒备的监狱 |
| [02:42] | but I think I found a way to get online. | 但我找到了上网的法子 |
| [02:45] | – No. – There’s a computer in the library | -不能吧 -图书馆里有台电脑 |
| [02:48] | that’s not supervised on Sundays. | 周日没有监视 |
| [02:50] | I think if I can pull library duty, I’ll be able to sneak on | 我如果能去图书馆值班 就能偷用电脑 |
| [02:54] | and track down whoever ratted me out. | 查到出卖我的人 |
| [02:56] | I am going to destroy that motherfucker. | 我一定会搞死那个王八蛋 |
| [03:02] | Not if I destroy him first. | 我会先下手弄死他 |
| [03:10] | Excuse me. What’s your policy on anonymous tips? | 抱歉 你们这儿的匿名举报有什么规定 |
| [03:25] | Fuck. Wi-Fi Pineapples. It’s so obvious. | 我操 无线菠萝路由器 显而易见啊 |
| [03:28] | Not to me. | 我不觉得 |
| [03:29] | Look, we set up a bunch of these at Hoolicon. | 听着 我们在互利大会上安一堆这个 |
| [03:32] | We position ourselves | 就能把自己安插进 |
| [03:33] | between everyone’s devices and the real Wi-Fi. | 参会者的手机与真正的无线网之间 |
| [03:36] | So, they log onto our boxes | 他们登上我们的路由 |
| [03:38] | and our boxes log onto the real Wi-Fi? | 我们的路由再登上真正的无线网 |
| [03:41] | – Exactly. – So, we show them a fake landing page, | -没错 -我们向他们展示一个假登录页 |
| [03:44] | and force everyone to | 然后强迫大家 |
| [03:44] | download a doctored version of the Hoolicon app. | 下载改编过的互利大会软件 |
| [03:47] | And they’ll never know the difference. | 他们不会看出来区别的 |
| [03:49] | No wonder Mia’s in prison. She’s brilliant. | 难怪米娅进监狱了 她太聪明了 |
| [03:52] | – I think this might actually work. – Wrong! | -我觉得这真能成 -错了 |
| [03:56] | It’ll never work. | 绝对成不了 |
| [03:58] | You don’t even know what we’ve been talking about. | 你连我们在说什么都不知道 |
| [03:59] | I don’t need to, Richard. | 我不需要知道 理查德 |
| [04:01] | The truth is, we’ve tried and tried. | 事实是 我们一而再再而三地尝试 |
| [04:03] | Every time we’ve gotten a whiff of success, | 每次我们获得一点点成功 |
| [04:05] | a giant pelican by the name of Fate | 就会有一只名为命运的鹈鹕 |
| [04:09] | takes a four-and-a-half- pound shit right on top of us. | 拉一坨四斤重的屎到我们头上 |
| [04:12] | There are people who are destined for greatness | 这世界上有人终将成就伟业 |
| [04:14] | and people who are not. | 也有人注定一生碰壁 |
| [04:15] | Richard, it seems you and I… are not. | 理查德 看来你我都会碰壁至死 |
| [04:18] | And so, I’ve had enough. | 所以 我受够了 |
| [04:20] | I’m ending it all tonight. | 今晚我要结束一切 |
| [04:22] | Suicide? I have a book for you. | 自杀吗 我可以给你本书 |
| [04:25] | No, Gilf. Last night, when I was sitting out there | 不是 吉尔弗 昨晚当我被笼罩在 |
| [04:28] | by the smoldering husk of my palapa, | 凉亭火苗发出的嘶鸣声中 |
| [04:31] | so cruelly taken away from me… | 看着火苗残忍地将凉亭从我身边夺走 |
| [04:32] | You burned it down yourself. | 是你自己放的火 |
| [04:34] | Which led me to my epiphany. | 那让我顿悟了真谛 |
| [04:38] | This epiphany. | 这个真谛 |
| [04:40] | “Greetings from Tibet. If you find yourself in Qamdo prefecture, | “来自西藏的问候 如果你恰好在昌都县 |
| [04:45] | do drop in. Gavin Belson.” | 记得来拜访我 盖文·贝尔森” |
| [04:48] | That was addressed to me. | 那是寄给我的 |
| [04:50] | No, that was addressed to “Richard Hendricks and company.” | 不 是寄给”理查德·亨德里克斯和公司” |
| [04:53] | Company, of which I am a part. | 而我就是公司一员 |
| [04:55] | You’re not seriously thinking of going to Tibet? | 你不是真的要去西藏吧 |
| [04:57] | You’re broke. How the fuck are you gonna pay for that? | 你破产了 你要怎么支付开销 |
| [05:00] | That’s where you come in, my great friends. | 这就要看你们了 我的好朋友们 |
| [05:03] | I figured we might pass the hat? | 我觉得我们可以募捐一下 |
| [05:06] | Just give whatever you are comfortable with. | 你们想给多少都可以 |
| [05:08] | I’ll pay for it, whatever it costs. | 无论多少钱 我来付 |
| [05:11] | Well, it seems the smallest of us has the biggest heart. | 看来我们之中最矮的家伙胸襟最宽广啊 |
| [05:15] | Thank you, young Jinathon. | 谢谢 小金主 |
| [05:17] | – Business class? – Premium economy. | -商务舱吗 -豪华经济舱 |
| [05:19] | You fly one way. | 单程机票 |
| [05:21] | Don’t you need a VISA to go to China? | 你去中国不是需要签证吗 |
| [05:23] | Yes. I can call my uncle in Beijing. | 对 我可以给北京的叔叔打电话 |
| [05:26] | He’s very corrupt. | 他非常腐败 |
| [05:28] | That sounded… ominous, | 听起来…不太妙 |
| [05:30] | but, gents, it’s as I was saying: | 但先生们 就像我常说的 |
| [05:32] | Where there’s a will, there’s a way… | 有志者事竟成 |
| [05:34] | just not for you guys. | 但只对你们不适用 |
| [05:38] | – No, I will not help you on this mission. – No? | -不 这次任务我不会帮你的 -不 |
| [05:42] | Richard, we always said we didn’t want to end up like Hooli. | 理查德 我们总说最后不能变得跟互利一样 |
| [05:44] | How are we like Hooli? | 我们怎么跟互利一样了 |
| [05:47] | We are trying to give free Internet to the entire world. | 我们想要给全世界一个免费互联网 |
| [05:50] | If we have to bend a few rules here and there– | 如果我们必须得钻些空子 |
| [05:52] | I mean, it’s all for the greater good, is it not? | 这都是为了大局着想 不是吗 |
| [05:54] | Gavin Belson started out with lofty goals too, | 盖文·贝尔森一开始也是向着崇高目标努力的 |
| [05:56] | but he just kept excusing immoral behavior just like this, | 但他一直以此为借口做类似这种的不道德行为 |
| [06:00] | until one day all that was left was a sad man | 直到有天他是变成了一个可悲的男人 |
| [06:04] | with funny shoes– | 穿着可笑的鞋子 |
| [06:05] | disgraced, friendless, and | 名誉扫地 众叛亲离 |
| [06:07] | engorged with the blood of a youthful charlatan. | 身上还流淌着年轻骗子的血液 |
| [06:09] | I am never going to be… | 我绝不会… |
| [06:12] | any of that. | 成为他那样的 |
| [06:14] | Richard, not that long ago, | 理查德 就在不久之前 |
| [06:15] | you agonized over using a stolen log-in | 你当时备受煎熬 就因为我们是 |
| [06:18] | to get into a bake-off with Endframe, | 通过盗用登录信息来获得了跟尾帧评测机会 |
| [06:20] | a company that stole from us. | 而那还是剽窃我们算法的公司 |
| [06:22] | But now you’re, what, shrugging off | 而现在你却满不在乎 |
| [06:25] | large-scale cybercrimes against innocent civilians? | 想要大规模地向无辜百姓进行网络犯罪 |
| [06:28] | It’s a means to an end. It’s not who I am. | 这只是结束的一种方法 不代表我是这种人 |
| [06:31] | I mean, Lincoln had to suspend habeas corpus to end the war, | 林肯为了结束战争不得不暂停人身保护权令 |
| [06:35] | – but he restored it after. – Lincoln? | -但他后来就重启了 -林肯 |
| [06:38] | Richard, it’s not that easy. | 理查德 这没那么简单 |
| [06:39] | There’s always a next time and a next time and a next time. | 总会有下次 下下次和下下下次 |
| [06:42] | I cannot knowingly contribute to your moral decay. | 我不能眼睁睁地送你走上道德沦丧的道路 |
| [06:47] | Well, what if you didn’t do it… knowingly? | 那如果你是无意中做的呢 |
| [06:52] | You’re always telling me how you spent your entire childhood | 你总是给我讲在你的童年生活里 |
| [06:55] | pretending that everything going on around you was okay. | 一直假装你一切都好 |
| [06:59] | – Uncle Jerry’s game. – Yeah, that. | -杰瑞叔叔的游戏 -是的 |
| [07:02] | Let’s play Uncle Jerry’s game. | 我们玩杰瑞叔叔游戏吧 |
| [07:05] | Do you know what you’re asking? | 你知道你在说什么吗 |
| [07:13] | Okay, guys, how we looking? | 好的 各位 怎么样了 |
| [07:16] | One second. Almost done. | 一秒 马上好 |
| [07:19] | All 12 Pineapples tested and packed. | 12部菠萝路由器都已测试并装箱 |
| [07:21] | Jared, you can come in now. | 贾里德 你现在可以进来了 |
| [07:25] | All right, all of our swag is in the car, | 好了 我们公司所有的赠品都放到车上了 |
| [07:28] | and I look forward to a successful promotion | 期待我们正当的节省空间应用 |
| [07:31] | of our legitimate space-saving app. | 可以成功推广 |
| [07:33] | Yup, that’s what this is. | 没错 就是这样 |
| [07:35] | Whatever. | 随便吧 |
| [07:36] | Well, now, gentlemen, this is it. Goodbye. | 先生们 就这样了 再见 |
| [07:41] | Obviously, I don’t care to make a big deal out of it, | 很明显 我并不想小题大做 |
| [07:44] | so I think it’s sufficient just to go around | 所以走前我只想跟你们聊聊 |
| [07:46] | and each of you say a memory or two of times | 每人和我说一两段我对你们生命 |
| [07:49] | where I’ve profoundly impacted your life. | 产生深远影响的回忆 就够了 |
| [07:53] | – It doesn’t have to be a profound impact. – We’re leaving now. | -没有深远影响也可以 -我们现在就走 |
| [07:56] | – What? – International flight. | -什么 -国际航班 |
| [07:58] | Four hours early. | 提早四小时 |
| [08:00] | – No, international flights are three hours early. – It’s a new rule. | -不 国际航班提前三小时 -有新规定 |
| [08:07] | Gentlemen. | 各位再会 |
| [08:10] | Okay, let’s have some fun. | 好吧 我们去找点乐子吧 |
| [08:25] | First hurdle down. We’re past security. | 过了第一关 我们通过了安检 |
| [08:27] | That made me nervous, sneaking all that shit in. | 偷运这些破东西进来让我非常紧张 |
| [08:30] | Why? We’re bringing tech to a tech convention. | 为什么 我们是把技术产品带进技术大会 |
| [08:36] | When did Pied Piper get added to the vendor list? | ‘魔笛手’什么时候上的展商名单 |
| [08:44] | C-4210. | 位置C-4210 |
| [08:52] | That looks like us. | 看来那就是我们的展位 |
| [08:54] | Oh no, that can’t be. | 不 这不可能 |
| [08:56] | No. This is not what I was promised. | 不 这跟他们跟我承诺的不一样 |
| [08:59] | – What? It’s fine. – But they told me | -什么 挺好的 -但他们跟我说 |
| [09:01] | that we would have prominent placement | 我们会在一个显眼的位置 |
| [09:03] | with proximity to high-traffic corridor. | 在人流密集的通道旁边 |
| [09:06] | We’re in the middle of the road here. | 我们这是在路中间 |
| [09:08] | – So? – Yeah, who gives a fuck? | -所以怎样 -是啊 谁他妈在乎 |
| [09:10] | Well, Jared does, and– and we do as well. | 贾里德在乎 我们也在乎 |
| [09:14] | Uh, you know what? Why don’t you go check out | 不如这样 你去看看 |
| [09:15] | what the bathroom situation’s like? | 洗手间的条件怎么样吧 |
| [09:18] | Yes. Nothing would make me happier. Good. | 对 没什么比这个更让我开心了 好 |
| [09:20] | You know, I actually believe him. | 我相信他是真的很开心 |
| [09:24] | Okay. | 好了 |
| [09:26] | So, gentlemen, | 那么 先生们 |
| [09:28] | okay, while Jared’s gone, let’s get our bearings. | 贾里德不在了 我们开始干正事 |
| [09:32] | All right, so, we are here. | 好的 我们在这个位置 |
| [09:36] | Now, you guys deploy the Pineapples. | 现在 你们去布置菠萝路由器 |
| [09:38] | Start with high-traffic areas, so that means entrances. | 从人流密集的地方开始 也就是入口 |
| [09:41] | People are setting up equipment everywhere, | 大家都在到处安装设备 |
| [09:42] | so it shouldn’t look that unusual, | 所以看起来应该不会太可疑 |
| [09:44] | but be careful, don’t get caught, | 但还是要小心 别被抓到 |
| [09:46] | – and remember why we are here. – Richard? | -记住我们来这里的原因 -理查德 |
| [09:50] | Winnie. | 温妮 |
| [09:54] | Hello. Hi. | 你好 |
| [09:55] | Yeah. Oh. | 好啊 |
| [10:00] | I haven’t seen you since– | 好久不见 自从… |
| [10:02] | Since you threw yourself down a flight of stairs | 自从你把自己摔下楼梯 |
| [10:04] | to prove how smart you were. | 就为了证明你有多聪明 |
| [10:05] | That whole spaces-tab thing was… | 那件空格还是制表符的事真是 |
| [10:08] | Kind of petty? | 有点小题大做 |
| [10:09] | Petty? No, I was gonna say | 小题大做 不 我是想说 |
| [10:10] | “Illustrative of our vast differences.” | “说明了我们之间无法调和的矛盾” |
| [10:13] | – Right. – What are you doing here? | -好吧 -你在这里做什么 |
| [10:15] | I’m here helping my friend launch his new company. | 我来这里帮我的朋友发布他的新公司 |
| [10:18] | “My friend.” He’s actually my boyfriend. | “我的朋友”其实是我的男朋友 |
| [10:20] | That’s his booth right there. | 那边是他的展台 |
| [10:22] | He’s got a big one– I mean the booth. | 他挺大啊 我是说他的展台 |
| [10:25] | But, um, boyfriend, uh-oh. | 但是 男朋友 |
| [10:27] | – Awkward. – Why? | -有点尴尬 -为什么 |
| [10:30] | Nothing. It’s not. It’s actually… it’s cool. | 没什么 不是 其实 没什么 |
| [10:33] | Totally cool. Cool beans. | 完全没关系 都[豆]好 |
| [10:35] | Beans, beans, magical fruit. | 豆子 豆子 神奇的水果 |
| [10:36] | The more you eat, the more you… | 吃得越多 你就越… |
| [10:39] | – Toot? – Toot. | -爱放屁 -爱放屁 |
| [10:41] | Hey, Joel? Come over and meet Richard. | 乔尔 过来认识下理查德 |
| [10:44] | Oh, not– not needed. | 不用 不用麻烦 |
| [10:46] | – Not needed. – Joel, Richard. | -不用 -乔尔 这是理查德 |
| [10:49] | Oh. Stairs guy. | 原来是”楼梯男” |
| [10:51] | Uh, that’s quite a booth you got there. | 你那边的展台不错啊 |
| [10:52] | Oh, yes, thank you. We really think | 是啊 谢谢 我们真心认为 |
| [10:54] | our company’s message is worth getting out there. | 我们公司的理念值得我们尽力展示出去 |
| [10:57] | Yeah, us too. Us too. | 是啊 我们也是 我们也是 |
| [10:58] | Um, we’re just trying to be a bit responsible with the spending. | 我们只是想把好钢用在刀刃上 |
| [11:02] | Sure, but when I sold my last company, | 当然 但当我卖掉我上一个公司后 |
| [11:04] | I realized I had the luxury to invest in something I believe in. | 我意识到我有能力投资一些我信仰的东西 |
| [11:08] | Helping humanity thrive. | 帮助人类走向繁荣 |
| [11:09] | That’s why I decided to bring PeaceFare into the world. | 所以我把和平大业带给了这个世界 |
| [11:13] | Ah, good for you. | 你真棒 |
| [11:15] | Okay. It was great to meet you, Richard. | 好了 很高兴认识你 理查德 |
| [11:16] | Yeah, and you too. | 我也是 |
| [11:19] | – Good seeing you. – Not if I see you first. | -很高兴又碰到你 -只恨我没先看到你 |
| [11:23] | Not that you asked, but you handled that very poorly. | 尽管你没问 但这事你处理得烂透了 |
| [11:34] | You know, Jian-Yang, | 你知道吗 杨建 |
| [11:35] | the silence in the car gave me some time to think | 刚才在车上的寂静给了我时间思考 |
| [11:38] | about the fact that our differences– Jesus! | 我们之前的差异… 老天 |
| [11:42] | Sorry. | 不好意思 |
| [11:47] | Jian-Yang! | 杨建 |
| [11:57] | – Fuck you, fat fuck. – Pineapple two is a go. | -操 妈的死胖子 -菠萝二号到位 |
| [12:00] | Fucking look at him, pictures everywhere. | 看看吧 全他妈是他的照片 |
| [12:03] | Fucking bearded baby. | 傻逼大胡子巨婴 |
| [12:04] | Cost us millions of dollars. | 让我们损失几百万 |
| [12:06] | It would make me very happy | 往基南·菲尔德斯帕的屁眼上 |
| [12:08] | to pour boiling metal down Keenan Feldspar’s asshole. | 浇沸腾的金属会让我非常开心 |
| [12:13] | How would that even work? | 那应该怎么操作 |
| [12:14] | Flip and pour. | 直接往上倒啊 |
| [12:15] | He’s gonna run, and then you’re slowly chasing him, | 他会逃跑 然后你想追他还跑不快 |
| [12:18] | trying to not spill your vat of boiling metal. | 因为不能弄洒了你那桶沸腾的液体金属 |
| [12:21] | – You’re gonna look like a fucking idiot. – Fuck you. | -你看起来就他妈会像个白痴 -去你的 |
| [12:24] | – Anybody looking? – No, just go. | -有人在看吗 -没有 装就是了 |
| [12:30] | What’s taking you so long? Hurry up! | 怎么这么久 快点 |
| [12:34] | What are you boys up to? | 你俩小子在干嘛 |
| [12:39] | All right? I go through my slides. Click, click, click. | 好了吗 我过一下我的幻灯片 点点点 |
| [12:42] | Jamiroquai plays. | 播放杰米罗奎乐队的音乐 |
| [12:44] | Now, I would very much like to welcome my good friend, | 现在 我很高兴得请出我的好朋友 |
| [12:48] | Keenan Feldspar! | 基南·菲尔德斯帕 |
| [12:52] | Where the fuck is he? | 他死哪去了 |
| [12:55] | Son, you’re supposed to be coming up from over there. | 孩子 你该从那边上来 |
| [12:57] | Totally, I’m just really kind of digging the vibe | 没错 我就是真的想带动 |
| [12:59] | over on this side. | 这边的氛围 |
| [13:01] | – Uh, Terry? – Yeah? | -特里 -什么事 |
| [13:03] | – Kid wants to come from over here. – Okay. | -这孩子想从这边上来 -好 |
| [13:05] | Excuse me, sir, do you have a moment? | 打扰一下 先生 你有时间吗 |
| [13:07] | This morning, Pied Piper were | 今天早上 ‘魔笛手’ |
| [13:10] | a last-minute add to the vendor list, | 在快截止时加入了参展商行列 |
| [13:12] | so I started watching them | 所以我开始监视他们 |
| [13:14] | and noticed some suspicious behavior. | 发现了一些可疑的行为 |
| [13:15] | I sent in for our tactical response team, | 我派出了我们的战术响应小队 |
| [13:17] | and with your permission, I’d like to sweep | 得到你的许可后 我想 |
| [13:19] | the convention floor with Yagi antennas, which are– | 用八木天线[用于接收无线信号]扫一下会议厅 |
| [13:21] | – Hoover. – Yes, sir. | -胡佛 -是 先生 |
| [13:23] | Four days ago, I spent $2 billion | 四天前 我花了二十亿美元 |
| [13:25] | on a piece-of-shit VR gadget that’s never gonna work. | 买了一个永远不能用的虚拟现实狗屁玩意 |
| [13:28] | I had to rebuild the entire operating system | 为了能让一个九十秒的样片 |
| [13:31] | just to get a 90-second demo that could play on a phone. | 能在手机上播放 我得重建整个操作系统 |
| [13:35] | And by the grace of God, I just may have pulled it off. | 上帝仁慈 我可能已经圆满完成了 |
| [13:37] | And now you want to talk to me about Pied fucking Piper? | 现在你来跟我说该死的’魔笛手’ |
| [13:40] | Sir, I’d like to think that | 先生 我在想 |
| [13:41] | if Gavin Belson were here, we’d make sure– | 如果盖文·贝尔森在的话 我们会确保 |
| [13:43] | Gavin fucking Belson is not here | 该死的盖文·贝尔森不在这 |
| [13:45] | ’cause I fired his ass! | 因为我把他赶走了 |
| [13:46] | Now, look, you go back to your little security room, | 听着 你回你的小监控室去 |
| [13:48] | you sit in the corner with a tinfoil hat on, | 戴顶锡帽 坐在角落 |
| [13:51] | and I swear, if I hear you wandered down the hallway | 我发誓 如果我听说你晃到走廊 |
| [13:54] | to take a piss, you are out on your ass. | 去上厕所的话 你就滚蛋走人 |
| [13:57] | You got that? | 明白了吗 |
| [13:59] | I do, sir. | 明白了 先生 |
| [14:09] | You know what? This might be | 你知道吗 现在或许 |
| [14:10] | a good time for me to hand out some flyers. | 是我去派些传单的好时机 |
| [14:13] | Richard, six Pineapples up, | 理查德 已经装了六部菠萝路由器 |
| [14:14] | six to go. | 还有六部待装 |
| [14:16] | – Good. – Something wrong? | -很好 -有什么问题吗 |
| [14:18] | Yeah, actually. Very wrong. | 确实有 非常不对劲 |
| [14:21] | PeaceFare is a game. | 和平大业是个游戏 |
| [14:23] | – What? – Yeah, look at his website. | -什么 -没错 看看他们的网站 |
| [14:25] | Give virtual coins to virtual homeless people. | 把虚拟货币捐给虚拟的无家可归的人 |
| [14:29] | Grow virtual corn to feed virtual starving villages. | 种植虚拟玉米来养活虚拟的村庄 |
| [14:33] | What the fuck, right? I mean, he’s over there | 这他妈什么鬼 对吧 他在那边 |
| [14:35] | making all this noise about | 吹得天花乱坠 |
| [14:36] | turning your mobile device into an empathy machine, | 就是把你的手机变成一台慈善机器 |
| [14:39] | – but it’s not doing anything. – Fascinating, Richard. | -却什么都改变不了 -真感人 理查德 |
| [14:42] | Have you heard anything about | 你关注过任何关于 |
| [14:43] | how Pied fucking Piper is doing? | 该死魔笛手的进展情况了吗 |
| [14:45] | Yes, our code is in the app, | 我知道 我们的代码植入了展会应用 |
| [14:46] | the Pineapples are online, | 菠萝路由器已连线 |
| [14:47] | and we’re at 3700 downloads. | 我们现在有三千七的下载量 |
| [14:49] | We’re ahead of schedule. | 超出了预期 |
| [14:51] | Shit. This could work. | 操 这真行得通 |
| [14:52] | That’s awesome. | 真了不起 |
| [14:53] | Yeah, exactly. | 对 没错 |
| [14:55] | We are doing something real. | 我们做的是实实在在的东西 |
| [14:57] | He is not, but she’s with him, | 他没有 但她却跟他在一起 |
| [15:00] | and I’m the petty one. Okay, well, what about the idea | 而我是小题大做的那个 种点真玉米 |
| [15:03] | of growing real corn to feed real starving people? | 养活真在挨饿的人怎么样 |
| [15:07] | – No. – Yeah, | -不行 -对 |
| [15:08] | his thing seems way easier. | 他的那个看上去容易多了 |
| [15:09] | Yeah, you can do it on your phone in your underwear. | 你可以穿着内裤在手机上做 |
| [15:11] | Just… plant the rest of the Pineapples, please. | 快去把剩下的菠萝路由器装好 拜托了 |
| [15:21] | – Here he comes, folks. – Oh, thanks. | -他来了 伙计 -谢谢 |
| [15:23] | Richard Hendricks, the Monet of compressionism. | 理查德·亨德里克斯 压缩算法界的莫奈 |
| [15:26] | Jared. | 贾里德 |
| [15:27] | Hey, which of the bathrooms is closest? | 最近的洗手间在哪 |
| [15:30] | End of the row, 78 paces to the right. | 这排的尽头 往右走七十八步 |
| [15:33] | Great. | 很好 |
| [15:35] | Do you know this is the actual laptop I used to code the app. | 你知道吗 我之前编程时用的就是这电脑 |
| [15:38] | Hey, let’s take some without my shoes, | 我们拍一些我不穿鞋子的照片 |
| [15:40] | yeah? Perfect. | 好吗 太好了 |
| [15:41] | Okay. Oh, hey, come. | 好 过来 |
| [15:42] | Yeah, so please start with my toes. | 请从我的脚趾开始 |
| [15:45] | Oh, nice. | 很好 |
| [15:46] | Can you– And these are photos of irrigation, | 你能 这些是灌溉的照片 |
| [15:48] | captured in the rain. | 在雨中拍摄的 |
| [15:50] | Yeah, it’s gonna look great. | 好 看起来会很棒 |
| [15:53] | Yeah, like that. | 对 像那样 |
| [15:54] | Poverty and penthos. | 贫穷和哀恸 |
| [15:55] | That looks so good. | 看上去很好 |
| [15:56] | Let’s do another one. Go on the other side. Yeah. | 我们再拍一张 去另一边 对 |
| [16:12] | – Did you do this? – What? What? | -是你干的吗 -什么 什么 |
| [16:15] | Did anyone see someone touch this laptop? | 有谁看见是谁动了这台笔记本吗 |
| [16:19] | – What? – Oh God. | -什么 -天哪 |
| [16:21] | This is very disturbing. | 这太恶心了 |
| [16:24] | Fuck it. I’m just gonna punch him. | 去他的 我要揍他 |
| [16:25] | Yeah, right. Have fun in jail, you moron. | 没错 在监狱里玩得开心 你个白痴 |
| [16:28] | – Oh shit. – Oh fuck, it’s him. | -糟糕 -我槽 是他 |
| [16:30] | – What do we do? – Uh, keep moving. | -我们怎么办 -继续走 |
| [16:38] | Fuck, do you think he saw us? | 妈的 你觉得他看到我们了吗 |
| [16:40] | Oh, he saw us. | 看到了 |
| [16:42] | – Fuck. – He saw us see him. | -他妈的 -他还看到我们看到他了 |
| [16:43] | Shit. Wait. | 可恶 等等 |
| [16:44] | What if he thinks we did it on purpose, | 要是他认为我们是故意这么做的呢 |
| [16:47] | like, we snubbed him? | 比如我们无视了他 |
| [16:50] | Fuck yeah. | 说得好 |
| [16:51] | We just snubbed the fuck out of Keenan Feldspar. | 我们无视了他妈的基南·菲尔德斯帕 |
| [16:55] | Hey, Richard. | 理查德 |
| [16:58] | I’m letting everyone know. | 我在通知所有人 |
| [16:59] | You might want to reset your critical passwords, | 你最好重设下你重要的密码 |
| [17:02] | because we’ve been hacked. | 因为我们被黑了 |
| [17:05] | Why– why would you say that? | 为 为什么这么说 |
| [17:06] | Someone changed my PeaceFare screensaver… | 有人改了我和平大业的屏保 |
| [17:09] | and I know it wasn’t anyone on my team, | 而且我知道这不是我团队里的人干的 |
| [17:11] | because they all respect me too much. | 因为他们都很尊重我 |
| [17:12] | What did they change it to? | 黑客把它改成了什么 |
| [17:14] | If you don’t mind me asking, just ’cause– | 如果你不介意我问的话 只是因为 |
| [17:15] | No, no, I won’t dignify it by repeating it. | 不不 我不会说出去让黑我的人为此窃喜 |
| [17:17] | I’m just saying you should take precautions. | 我只是说你该采取预防措施 |
| [17:19] | Also, Winnie spoke to security, | 并且 温妮去找了安保部门 |
| [17:21] | and they’re sending the tactical response team. | 他们派了战术反应小组来处理 |
| [17:24] | The what? | 什么小组 |
| [17:25] | The– Oh, here they are. | 战术 他们来了 |
| [17:35] | Oh shit. | 糟糕 |
| [17:37] | Bingo. We’ve got hostiles. | 找到了 我们找到敌人了 |
| [17:40] | Red team, Sebastian, | 红队 塞巴斯蒂安 |
| [17:42] | fan out and sweep the entire venue. | 扇形散开搜索整个会场 |
| [17:49] | Hey, Richard. Guess who has four thumbs | 理查德 猜猜谁被点了四个赞 |
| [17:51] | – and just snubbed Keenan Feldspar. – Us. | -还无视了基南·菲尔德斯帕 -我们 |
| [17:53] | Guys, someone called security, | 伙计们 有人叫来了安保 |
| [17:55] | now they’re doing a sweep of the area. | 他们正在搜索整个区域 |
| [17:56] | – What? – Okay? You’ve gotta go pull all the Pineapples. | -什么 -你们要拔掉所有菠萝路由器 |
| [17:58] | – What the fuck? – Who ratted us out? | -搞什么鬼 -谁把我们供出来的 |
| [17:59] | I don’t know. Probably we’ll never know. | 我不知道 大概永远也知道不了 |
| [18:02] | It’s impossible to tell. | 根本找不出来 |
| [18:03] | Just go. Go get– get them now. | 快去 去把 把路由器收回来 |
| [18:04] | Go. Just go. Please. | 去 快去 求你们了 |
| [18:10] | – Bingo. – Fuck! | -找到了 -妈的 |
| [18:12] | Come on. | 这边走 |
| [18:15] | Bingo. | 找到了 |
| [18:16] | Oh crap. We’ve got to split up. | 糟糕 我们得分头行动 |
| [18:18] | I’ll take the food court. You take the east concourse. | 我去美食广场 你去东大厅 |
| [18:20] | – I want the food court. – Just go! | -我要去美食广场 -快去 |
| [18:22] | Fuck. | 他妈的 |
| [18:25] | – Hey, man. – F-f-f-fucking Keenan. | -你好 朋友 -他 他妈的基南 |
| [18:28] | Hey, I have to go. | 我得走了 |
| [18:29] | Totally. Hey, did you snub me earlier? | 好啊 你之前是不是无视了我 |
| [18:32] | – No. – Yeah, you did. | -没有 -有的 你无视了 |
| [18:35] | You know you did. | 你知道你无视了我 |
| [18:37] | You made me feel bad. | 你让我很难受 |
| [18:38] | I like to feel good. Why would you do that to me? | 我喜欢愉悦的感觉 你为什么要无视我 |
| [18:41] | Seriously? | 说真的 |
| [18:43] | You fucked us, Keenan. | 你耍了我们 基南 |
| [18:45] | Richard was gonna take that deal, | 理查德正要接受那份协议 |
| [18:47] | and then you pulled it right out from under us. | 你就把协议从我们眼皮底下收走了 |
| [18:48] | You cost me, personally, a shit-ton of money. | 就我个人来说 你让我损失了一大笔钱 |
| [18:53] | Is that what Richard told you? | 理查德是这么跟你说的 |
| [19:06] | So? | 怎么样 |
| [19:07] | They got every single one, every single last one. | 他们每一个都找到了 一个不落 |
| [19:09] | – Fuck! – I don’t want to hear this. | -他妈的 -我不想听这个 |
| [19:10] | But we gotta be close, right? | 但我们肯定接近成功了 对吧 |
| [19:11] | Like, how many more phones do we need? | 我们还需要多少部手机 |
| [19:12] | I don’t know. Close isn’t good enough. | 我不知道 数目只是接近还不够 |
| [19:14] | No, this is binary. Either we have enough or we don’t. | 这是二值性的 要么成功 要么失败 |
| [19:16] | – Oh f-f-f-fuck. – Okay, I have an idea. | -我 我操 -我有一个主意 |
| [19:19] | So, I’ve got one Pineapple left. | 我这还有一个菠萝路由器 |
| [19:21] | Now, I’ve rigged some batteries on top of it, | 我在它上面装了些电池 |
| [19:24] | because we’re gonna have to go mobile. | 因为我们得移动化 |
| [19:26] | We have to try. Okay, I’m going to put this in your backpack. | 我们得试试 我把这个放在你的背包里 |
| [19:28] | – Oh no. – No, it’s fine. | -不要这样 -没事的 |
| [19:30] | – I don’t want it. I don’t want it. – Dinesh, it’s fine. | -我不要 我不要 -迪尼希 没事的 |
| [19:32] | And you, you’re gonna hold this kill switch, | 并且你 你要拿好这个开关 |
| [19:33] | and then you’re gonna walk | 然后你要走到 |
| [19:34] | into the most densely populated area you can find. | 你能找到的人最多的区域里去 |
| [19:37] | All right? If you see the security coming, | 懂吗 如果你看到安保来了 |
| [19:38] | remember, you press that button and, | 记住 你按下那个按钮 |
| [19:40] | poof, you’re gone. | 你就不会被发现了 |
| [19:41] | Okay. I’ll get as many of those motherfuckers as I can. | 好的 我会弄来尽可能多的混蛋用户 |
| [19:43] | We’ll be rewarded in the end. | 我们最终会功成名就的 |
| [19:45] | When the fuck were you gonna tell us? | 你他妈打算什么时候告诉我们 |
| [19:47] | Tell you what? | 告诉你们什么 |
| [19:48] | You know what, fat sack of shit. | 你知道是什么 你这屎袋 |
| [19:50] | Richard, do you know what? | 理查德 你知道是什么吗 |
| [19:52] | No, I don’t. | 不 我不知道 |
| [19:52] | I-I– I don’t know what. | 我 我不知道是什么 |
| [19:54] | Dinesh, you need to move. | 迪尼希 你得行动了 |
| [19:54] | Well, not until I find out if you know what. | 我要先搞明白他问的到底是什么事 |
| [19:58] | – Go on. – Okay, fine. | -说吧 -好吧 |
| [20:00] | I messed with Joel’s screensaver, | 我偷换了乔尔的屏保 |
| [20:02] | and then he told security, | 他找来了保安 |
| [20:04] | and now they’re the ones pulling up all the Pineapples. | 结果现在他们把所有的菠萝路由器都拔了 |
| [20:07] | What the fuck are you talking about? | 你他妈在说什么 |
| [20:09] | What are you talking about? | 你在说什么 |
| [20:10] | You acted like you wanted to take Keenan Feldspar’s offer. | 你装作想接受基南·菲尔德斯帕的出价 |
| [20:12] | Well, I just ran into him. He said you turned him down. | 我刚碰到他 他说你拒绝了他 |
| [20:16] | Well, n– Okay, well… | 好吧 不… 好吧… |
| [20:19] | Who are you going to believe, me or him? | 你信谁 信我还是他 |
| [20:21] | Him. He showed me the e-mail you sent him. | 他 他给我看了你发给他的邮件 |
| [20:24] | Showed you the e-mail? | 给你看了邮件 |
| [20:25] | You fucking snake. | 你这个卑鄙小人 |
| [20:28] | Dinesh, you need to move, now. Look, he pulled the deal. | 迪尼希 你得赶紧走了 是他反悔了 |
| [20:31] | Yeah, but you didn’t know | 但是你给他发邮件的时候 |
| [20:32] | that when you sent him the e-mail, did you? | 还不知道 是吧 |
| [20:33] | Dinesh, you need to move. I mean, come on. | 迪尼希 你得走了 赶紧的 |
| [20:36] | – You need to go. Go. Go. – Gentlemen. | -你得走了 走啊 -先生们 |
| [20:39] | I’m going to have to see the contents of that backpack. | 我们需要检查那个背包 |
| [20:46] | Bingo. | 找到了 |
| [20:54] | What did you change it to, Richard? | 你把它改成什么了 理查德 |
| [20:56] | What? | 什么 |
| [20:58] | Joel’s screensaver. | 乔尔的屏保 |
| [21:00] | It doesn’t matter now. | 现在不重要了 |
| [21:02] | No? | 是吗 |
| [21:04] | PoopFare. | 拉屎大业 |
| [21:07] | I’m sorry. PoopFare? | 抱歉 拉屎大业 |
| [21:11] | Yeah, it was, like, a play on the name. | 是的 就稍微改下名字 |
| [21:13] | Is it a play on the name? PissFare would be way better. | 稍微改下名字 撒尿大业更好 |
| [21:17] | Or PenisFare. | 或者鸡巴大业 |
| [21:19] | Or PeaceFart. That’s just changing one letter. | 或者和平大屁 这只用改一个字 |
| [21:22] | Look, he– he turned around. I had, like, a second, okay? | 听着 他转身了 我只有一秒钟时间 |
| [21:25] | It’s the best I could come up with. | 这是我能想到最好的了 |
| [21:29] | PoopFare? | 拉屎大业 |
| [21:33] | PoopFare? | 拉屎大业 |
| [21:36] | – Are you serious? – Yeah. | -你是认真的吗 -是的 |
| [21:38] | You sacrificed… | 你牺牲了… |
| [21:40] | everything that we’ve worked for… | 我们努力打造的一切… |
| [21:44] | for PoopFare? | 就为了改个拉屎大业 |
| [21:47] | How was PoopFare… | 拉屎大业… |
| [21:51] | for the greater good? | 对伟大事业有什么帮助 |
| [21:53] | It wasn’t. | 并不是 |
| [21:55] | You compared yourself to Abraham Lincoln, Richard. | 你把自己比作亚伯拉罕·林肯 理查德 |
| [21:59] | Can you do me a favor? | 你能帮我个忙吗 |
| [22:02] | Can you say it so I know I’m not hallucinating? | 你能再说一遍让我确定这不是我的幻觉吗 |
| [22:05] | – I just did. – Just… | -我刚说了 -只管… |
| [22:07] | say it. | 再说一遍 |
| [22:08] | – Jared. – Richard, look me in the eyes! | -贾里德 -理查德 看着我的眼睛 |
| [22:11] | Look me in the eyes, and you name… | 看着我的眼睛 说出… |
| [22:16] | – our undoing! – Hey, come on. Calm down now. | -我们失败的原因 -好了 冷静 |
| [22:18] | PoopFare! You reckless child. | 拉屎大业 你这个鲁莽的孩子 |
| [22:23] | Gentlemen. Come with me, please. | 先生们 请跟我来 |
| [22:28] | Sit down. | 坐吧 |
| [22:30] | Well, well, well. | 瞧瞧看啊 |
| [22:32] | Richard Hendricks. | 理查德·亨德里克斯 |
| [22:34] | Sorry, do I know you? | 抱歉 我认识你吗 |
| [22:35] | No… but I know all about you. | 不认识…但是我知道你的一切 |
| [22:40] | These Wi-Fi Pineapples… are they yours? | 这些菠萝路由器…是你的吗 |
| [22:47] | And this image from the security footage? | 这些监控录像里的画面呢 |
| [22:50] | Smell anything? | 闻到什么了吗 |
| [22:52] | These two individuals look familiar to you? | 这俩人看着眼熟吗 |
| [22:56] | Last question. | 最后一个问题 |
| [22:59] | Do you recognize this? | 你认得这个吗 |
| [23:02] | It’s an interview I just found from Code/Rag | 这是我从今年十月的”戏说编码”上 |
| [23:05] | from October of this year, | 找到的一篇采访 |
| [23:07] | in which you said you and Gavin Belson would, quote, | 里面你说你和盖文·贝尔森 原话是 |
| [23:11] | “Put Jack Barker out of a job.” | “让杰克·巴克失业” |
| [23:13] | Did you say that, Richard? | 是你说的吗 理查德 |
| [23:17] | You know what? Yes. Yeah. | 你知道吗 是的 |
| [23:21] | Yeah, this is me. | 对 是我说的 |
| [23:23] | Because apparently everything I say or type | 显然我说或打出的一切 |
| [23:28] | gets me into trouble, because I’m a… idiot. | 都会让我陷入麻烦 因为我是个…傻逼 |
| [23:32] | Well now. | 好了 |
| [23:37] | Tenley! | 坦利 |
| [23:40] | What the hell are these gentlemen doing in my office? | 这些先生们在我办公室干什么 |
| [23:43] | We caught them with Pineapples. | 我们抓住他们在安放菠萝路由器 |
| [23:45] | You mean the Pineapples | 你是说那些我雇他们来 |
| [23:46] | that I hired them to bring to the conference | 在会场偷偷安放以对我们的网络安全 |
| [23:48] | as part of a covert penetration test of our Wi-Fi security? | 进行渗透测试的菠萝信号器吗 |
| [23:53] | – Sorry, we didn’t know. – You weren’t supposed to. | -抱歉 我们不知道 -不知道就对了 |
| [23:56] | Now, give these gentlemen their passes and equipment back | 把这些先生们的通行证和设备还给他们 |
| [24:00] | and get them back on the floor. | 让他们继续工作 |
| [24:05] | You know, you said some very nice things | 你在那篇采访中 |
| [24:07] | about Gavin Belson in that interview. | 帮盖文·贝尔森说了很多好话 |
| [24:10] | You could’ve very easily kicked a good man when he was down. | 你本可以轻易在他低谷期踩他两脚 |
| [24:14] | Good luck with whatever it is you’re doing. | 不论你在做什么 祝你好运 |
| [24:16] | I’d walk you down myself, | 我很想送你下去 |
| [24:18] | but for reasons I really can’t get into… | 但我现在没法离开这房间 |
| [24:21] | I’m not allowed to leave this room. | 原因我真的不太方便说 |
| [24:25] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [24:36] | There you are. You never came back to the booth. | 你在这呢 你没回展台 |
| [24:39] | You didn’t want to see how it all turned out? | 你不好奇结果如何吗 |
| [24:42] | I wasn’t really in the mood. | 我没什么心情 |
| [24:44] | Are you playing PeaceFare? | 你在玩和平大业吗 |
| [24:45] | Yeah. I just gave an orphan | 对 我刚送了个孤儿 |
| [24:47] | her first calculator. | 她人生中第一台计算器 |
| [24:49] | Good. Good. | 很好 很好 |
| [24:51] | But I’ve got something much better. | 但我有更好的消息告诉你 |
| [24:56] | See that number? | 看到这个数字了吗 |
| [24:59] | That is the number of installs | 这是在这次互利大会上 |
| [25:02] | that we’ve got from Hoolicon alone. | 我们应用的安装次数 |
| [25:05] | We have moved all of Melcher’s data | 我们已经把梅尔彻所有的数据 |
| [25:07] | onto a network of mobile devices. | 都转移到手机组成的网络上了 |
| [25:10] | We did it. | 我们成功了 |
| [25:12] | Do Dinesh and Gilfoyle know? | 迪尼希和吉尔弗约尔知道吗 |
| [25:13] | Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, they know. | 知道 他们知道 |
| [25:15] | Now that this worked, they like me again. | 我们现在成功了 他们又喜欢我了 |
| [25:17] | They’re off getting churros to celebrate. | 他们去买吉事果庆祝了 |
| [25:19] | I told them that we would meet them at Barker’s keynote, so… | 我说了我们会一起去巴克的演讲厅等他们 |
| [25:24] | come on. | 来吧 |
| [25:25] | I mean… | 我想说 |
| [25:27] | Richard, the fact that you think that | 理查德 你现在觉得 |
| [25:29] | success justifies all your behavior– | 成功就能让你的行为变合理 |
| [25:32] | We were in crisis mode, okay? | 我们本来身处危机之中 好吗 |
| [25:35] | And yeah, I lost my head, | 没错 我是一时糊涂 |
| [25:36] | but crisis averted, | 但现在危机解除了 |
| [25:38] | so it’s time to reinstate habeas corpus, huh? | 是时候恢复人身保护令了 |
| [25:42] | Be Honest Abe again. | 重新做回好林肯 |
| [25:43] | What about the next crisis, Richard? | 那下次危机来临时怎么办 理查德 |
| [25:46] | Jared, this won’t happen again. | 贾里德 这种事再也不会发生了 |
| [25:48] | I swear. | 我发誓 |
| [25:49] | So, let’s just enjoy it… | 让我们一起享受成功 |
| [25:53] | for a minute. | 一分钟就好 |
| [25:54] | Please. | 求你了 |
| [26:01] | Come on, give it up! | 掌声响起来 |
| [26:03] | I love this company! | 我爱这家公司 |
| [26:06] | And how about you? | 你们呢 |
| [26:08] | And how about Jamiroquai? | 杰米罗奎尔乐队呢 |
| [26:10] | Ladies and gentlemen, oh, let’s have it. | 女士们先生们 我们来看看 |
| [26:14] | But wait a minute. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. | 但等等 等一等 |
| [26:17] | Wasn’t the original title | 本来大家的头条标题 |
| [26:18] | of their chart-topping hit “Virtual Insanity”? | 不是叫”虚拟疯狂”吗 |
| [26:23] | Why is he singing “Virtual Reality”? | 怎么大家现在开始称赞”虚拟现实”了 |
| [26:27] | You know, I may need a little help | 要想一探究竟 |
| [26:29] | getting to the bottom of this | 我需要一位好友的帮助 |
| [26:30] | from my very good friend, Keenan Feldspar! | 大家掌声有请基南·菲尔德斯帕 |
| [26:41] | There he is! | 他来了 |
| [26:44] | You guys ready to see the future? | 你们想看看未来什么样吗 |
| [26:48] | You know, at the beginning of the presentation, | 在演讲最开始时 |
| [26:50] | I told all of you to update your HooliPhone OS, right? | 我让大家都更新了互利手机的系统 对吗 |
| [26:55] | Now, I want you to go into “Settings,” | 现在 请大家进入”设置”界面 |
| [26:57] | and you’re gonna find a brand-new toggle | 你们会看到一个新加入的功能 |
| [26:59] | labeled “HooliVR.” | 叫做’互利虚实’ |
| [27:02] | You’re gonna want to turn that on. | 请大家打开这个功能 |
| [27:05] | Now, look under your seats. | 现在 看看你们座位下方 |
| [27:07] | When you power up your HooliVR goggles, | 当你们打开’互利虚实’眼镜后 |
| [27:11] | they will “Automagically” pair with your phone. | 他们会神奇地自动匹配上你的手机 |
| [27:14] | Put ’em on | 戴上眼镜 |
| [27:15] | and prepare to be amazed! | 开始一段奇幻的旅程 |
| [27:19] | Say hi to that barmaid for me. | 替我向酒吧女招待问好 |
| [27:25] | Oh shit! Fuck! | 该死 我操 |
| [27:31] | What’s going on? | 怎么了 |
| [27:33] | Turn up the lights, please. Something’s happening here. | 请亮灯 出了什么事情 |
| [27:37] | Uh, stay calm. | 请大家稍安勿躁 |
| [27:38] | You don’t think this had anything to do with us, do you? | 你觉得这事应该不会和我们有关系吧 |
| [27:41] | We appear to have a bit of a technical problem. | 我们可能出现了一点技术问题 |
| [27:43] | I’m going to get to the bottom of this right away. | 我会立刻查清真相 |
| [27:47] | Fuck! | 该死 |
| [27:51] | Gelong-la, there is a loud man here to see you. | 格隆[比丘僧] 外面有人吵着见你 |
| [27:54] | He says you sent for him. | 他说是你让他来的 |
| [27:56] | Qamdo in the house! | 到昌都啦 |
| [28:00] | Haircut? | 这什么发型 |
| [28:02] | Are you fucking kidding me? | 你他妈在逗我吗 |
| [28:04] | No. | 不 |
| [28:06] | I’m really here. | 我真的来了 |