| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:07] | This is not funny. | 这一点都不好笑 |
| [00:09] | Someone got you a subscription to Older Bride? | 有人帮你订了《大龄新娘》吗 |
| [00:12] | I think that qualifies as very funny. | 我觉得这该算是超级好笑的事吧 |
| [00:14] | 17 Reasons not To Give Up the Hunt. | 《17个不放弃觅爱的理由》 |
| [00:18] | We all know that my singleness is a choice. | 大家都知道我单身是自己的选择 |
| [00:21] | – Oh, you go, sistah. – So, clearly this was you two? | -真会扯 妹子 -显然这是你俩干的 |
| [00:23] | Syd, look, you know if I came up with a prank this brilliant, | 小希 你知道如果是我想出这么有才的恶作剧 |
| [00:26] | I would be the first person to take credit for it. | 我一定会第一个站出来居功的 |
| [00:27] | – How is this brilliant? – First of all, it’s ridiculous, | -怎么有才了 -首先 很荒唐 |
| [00:30] | but with that little kernel of truth | 但加上一点真相的精髓 |
| [00:31] | that evokes our deepest fears– in this case, | 唤起我们最深的恐惧 以这次来说 |
| [00:33] | dying alone and unloved. | 就是孤独终老没人爱 |
| [00:36] | But it’s also very mean, and whoever did it is bad. | 但这也太过分了 无论是谁做的都太不对了 |
| [00:39] | Are we expecting somebody? | 有客户要来吗 |
| [00:41] | Simon said something about a royal arrival. | 萨蒙说皇室成员要来 |
| [00:45] | Princess is our most distinguished visitor. | 公主是我们最高贵的访客 |
| [00:49] | During her visit, I expect– nay, | 在她访问期间 我希望 不 |
| [00:53] | I require– you to be on your best behavior. | 我要求 你们拿出最好的表现 |
| [00:57] | Is that his Dame Judy or Dame Edna? | 他这是模仿朱迪·丹奇女爵士还是埃德娜女爵士 |
| [00:59] | So do not get too close. | 不要太亲近 |
| [01:02] | Do not make eye contact. | 不要有眼神交流 |
| [01:04] | And under no circumstance may you stroke the princess. | 在任何情况下 都不能打公主 |
| [01:08] | I’d assume that goes for all royalty. | 我想这对所有皇室成员都适用 |
| [01:10] | Or anyone, really. | 对所有人都适用 |
| [01:12] | She’s here. | 她到了 |
| [01:16] | English cat. | 英国猫 |
| [01:19] | What? If I said it was just a cat, nobody would’ve showed up. | 怎么了 如果我说是猫 没人会来听我训话 |
| [01:22] | Come on. | 别这样 |
| [01:23] | Simon Roberts, you sexy devil. | 萨蒙·罗伯茨 你这个迷人的坏家伙 |
| [01:26] | Judy, get over here. | 朱迪 快过来抱抱 |
| [01:30] | Sydney, this is Judy Mills of Regal Kitty cat food. | 希德妮 这位是御猫猫粮的朱迪·米尔斯 |
| [01:32] | Wow, look at this place. | 看这个地方 |
| [01:34] | Oh, Princess is going to love it here. | 公主会非常喜欢的 |
| [01:37] | We’re getting an office pet? | 我们要养办公室宠物吗 |
| [01:38] | – Just for a few days. – To help your team | -就几天 -帮助你们的团队 |
| [01:40] | get a… “Feline” for our customer experience. | 拥有一种”猫”趣横生的顾客体验 |
| [01:43] | I see what you did there, it’s clever. | 我明白你用的谐音词 很有才 |
| [01:45] | We’re gonna make her feel right at home. | 我们会让她感觉像在家一样 |
| [01:46] | We put bowls of cat treats all around the office. | 我们在办公室摆满了碗装猫食 |
| [01:49] | Well, I can’t wait to hear the pitch | 我已经等不及听你们 |
| [01:51] | – you’re cooking up for Wednesday. – Prepare to be wowed. | -周三的推介了 -准备好说”哇”吧 |
| [01:54] | Or shall I say…wowmuah! | 还是我应该说 喵 |
| [01:56] | This guy gets it. | 这家伙一点就通 |
| [01:58] | Oh, and I was very excited to hear about your agency’s | 我听说你们广告公司对数字与数据 |
| [02:01] | new emphasis on hard numbers and data. | 非常重视 我真是太高兴了 |
| [02:03] | Excuse me? | 什么 |
| [02:04] | Yeah, I heard you hired a quant. | 我听说你们聘请了宽客 |
| [02:07] | Ah. A what? | 什么 |
| [02:07] | The question is not what | 问题不是 |
| [02:09] | is a quant, but rather, who is the quant? | 什么是宽客 而是谁是宽客 |
| [02:12] | And the answer to that… is I. | 答案就是 我 |
| [02:14] | – You what? – Am the quant. I’m the quant. | -你什么 -我是宽客 |
| [02:16] | You don’t know your own quant? | 你不认识自家的宽客吗 |
| [02:17] | Quant’s the main reason we’re here. | 宽客可是我们委托你们的主要原因 |
| [02:19] | Oh, no, no, he loves the quant and, more importantly, | 不 他喜欢宽客 更重要的是 |
| [02:21] | he loves that you love the quant. Right, Dad? | 他很高兴你喜欢宽客 对吗 爸 |
| [02:22] | Oh, the heart quants what the heart quants. | 心要多”宽” 就有多”宽” |
| [02:25] | Come here, you little quant. | 过来 小宽客 |
| [02:27] | What the hell are you? | 你到底是什么人 |
| [02:46] | Colin is our new senior quantitative analyst. | 科林是我们新的高级量化分析师 |
| [02:48] | Hence my abbreviated moniker, quant. | 所以缩写称谓是宽客 |
| [02:51] | You knew we hired him. | 你知道我们聘请了他 |
| [02:52] | Really big argument with Gordon, remember? | 和戈登大大地争执了一番 记得吗 |
| [02:54] | And then, ultimately, we outvoted you. | 最后 你以少数票落败 |
| [02:55] | Really? I guess I just blocked it out for some reason. | 是吗 我肯定因为某种原因把这段记忆抹掉了 |
| [02:58] | I use deep data combined with proprietary algorithms | 我将深层数据与独有的算法相结合 |
| [03:01] | in order to microtarget customers and increase market share. | 用以微定位顾客与提升市场占有率 |
| [03:04] | I just realized why I blocked it out. | 我刚意识到 我为什么会抹掉那段记忆了 |
| [03:05] | Look, all the big agencies are using these whiz kids. | 所有的大型广告公司都聘请这种神童 |
| [03:07] | I mean, Colin is the best at what he does. | 科林在这行中最棒了 |
| [03:09] | He’s a genius. | 他是个天才 |
| [03:09] | Genius. I hate it when people throw that word around. | 天才 我讨厌人们滥用这个词 |
| [03:11] | What makes you a genius? | 凭什么说你是天才 |
| [03:13] | Nine different standardized tests | 九种不同的标准化测试 |
| [03:14] | and the MacArthur Genius Grant that I was awarded at 16. | 以及我16岁时获得了麦克阿瑟天才奖 |
| [03:16] | It was a rhetorical question, Mr. Mensa. | 我这是反问句不用答 高IQ先生 |
| [03:18] | Dad, the cat people really want him on the account. | 爸 猫粮公司的人真心希望他参与 |
| [03:20] | It’s one of the only reasons they’re even considering us. | 这是他们考虑我们的唯一原因 |
| [03:22] | You know, give him a chance, you might like him. | 给他一个机会 也许你会喜欢他 |
| [03:24] | Who knows? By next week, you might be asking | 谁知道呢 也许下周 你就会要求 |
| [03:26] | to join my Quidditch team. | 加入我的魁地奇球队 |
| [03:28] | “Like” Might be a strong word. | “喜欢”这个词或许太过了 |
| [03:29] | You know, let’s aim for “Tolerate.” | 我们以”容忍”为目标 |
| [03:31] | Yeah. | 好的 |
| [03:33] | Hey, Syd, have you seen Princess? | 小希 你看到公主了吗 |
| [03:35] | I saved some of the cat treats before Andrew could get to them. | 我留了些猫粮 免得又被安德鲁吃了 |
| [03:37] | You know, he’s really developing a taste for these. | 他真的喜欢上吃这个了 |
| [03:41] | Soon as they put her down, | 他们把她放下后 |
| [03:41] | she just made herself at home. | 她就把这里当自己家了 |
| [03:44] | You know Princess is a he, right? | 你知道公主是公的 对吗 |
| [03:46] | – How can you tell? – He’s got little cat balls. | -你怎么分辨的 -他有猫蛋 |
| [03:48] | You can see ’em. The cat penis you can’t see, you know, | 可以看到 猫的阴茎却是看不到的 |
| [03:51] | till it’s too late. | 除非病变为时已晚 |
| [03:53] | That’s very educational, Lauren. | 太有教育意义了 劳伦 |
| [03:54] | You… Maybe you could take Mr. Princess somewhere else? | 你不如把公主先生带到别的地方去吧 |
| [03:59] | How could you resist this little fur-ball? | 你如何抗拒这个小毛球的魅力 |
| [04:02] | Hi, big guy. | 你好 小家伙 |
| [04:03] | I’m not much of a cat person. | 我不太喜欢猫 |
| [04:05] | You know, you look into a dog’s eyes, | 当你看向狗狗的眼睛 |
| [04:07] | and you can see its soul, and | 可以看到它的灵魂 |
| [04:08] | you look into a cat’s eyes, and you see a soul | 看向猫的眼睛时 可以看到一个灵魂 |
| [04:11] | that wants to kill you in your sleep. | 想在你睡着时杀死你 |
| [04:12] | But there would be no cuter way to go. | 但没有比这样更可爱的了 |
| [04:15] | Do you want to rip my throat out? | 你想撕开我的喉咙吗 |
| [04:16] | Yes, you do. | 是的 你想 |
| [04:18] | Yes, you do. | 是的 你想 |
| [04:21] | I appreciate it, Lauren. | 谢谢 劳伦 |
| [04:23] | – Good-bye. – I’m not even on Regal Kitty. | -再见 -我根本不负责御猫猫粮的广告 |
| [04:24] | I’ve got Maytag this week. | 我这周要弄美泰格公司的 |
| [04:29] | Oh, let him in. It’s cold outside. | 让他进来吧 外面好冷 |
| [04:31] | You know that’s still inside, right? | 你知道那里依然是室内吧 |
| [04:35] | Fine, you can let him in for a bit. | 好吧 让他进来待一会儿 |
| [04:39] | Good boy. Oh, you good boy. | 好孩子 你真是好孩子 |
| [04:43] | If I died alone in my house, would you eat my face? | 如果我孤独地死在家里 你会吃掉我的脸吗 |
| [04:45] | Yes, you would. That’s where the tenderest meat is. | 你会的 最嫩的肉就是脸上的了 |
| [04:50] | I love this direction. | 我喜欢这个创意方向 |
| [04:51] | We see the cat owner leaving for work. | 猫的主人去上班 |
| [04:53] | And then we see the cat leaving for work. | 然后猫去上班 |
| [04:55] | He goes to a cat office, just like a human office. | 他到了猫的办公室 和人的办公室一样 |
| [04:57] | Except all the cats are wearing little shirts and ties. | 只是所有的猫都穿衬衫打领带 |
| [04:58] | And they don’t work. They just surf the Internet all day. | 他们不工作 只是整天上网 |
| [05:00] | – Just like humans do. – They’re on Facebook. – Myspace? | -就像人一样 -他们上Facebook -聚友网 |
| [05:03] | – Not anymore. – Friendster. – Way gone. | -已经没了 -朋友网 -早挂了 |
| [05:04] | Porn– that’s still a thing, right? | 色情片 现在还流行的 对吧 |
| [05:05] | – Yeah, yeah. – It’s going strong. | -没错 -淫男欲女大行其道 |
| [05:07] | YouTube. Yes! | YouTube 没错 |
| [05:09] | Instead of watching cat videos, | 但不是人看猫的视频 |
| [05:10] | the cats are watching human videos. | 而是猫看人的视频 |
| [05:11] | Right, so he’s got his arms all straight out playing a keyboard. | 对 他伸出胳膊 敲键盘 |
| [05:14] | We got a guy doing that, just like the cat, right? | 视频中有个人也这样 和猫一样 |
| [05:17] | We see a lady peeking out from a grocery bag. | 一位女士从食品袋里向外窥探 |
| [05:19] | Regal Kitty: your cat is basically a person. | 御猫猫粮 你的猫其实算是个人 |
| [05:21] | Feed them like one. | 让他们吃得也像个人样 |
| [05:22] | I have the best team of creatives in the country. | 我拥有全国最棒的创意团队 |
| [05:24] | Come on, high paw, high paw. | 来吧 击爪击爪 |
| [05:26] | That’s a fantastic idea. | 太棒的创意了 |
| [05:28] | The data shows otherwise. | 数据显示并非如此 |
| [05:31] | Do you think this will turn him off? | 这个可以把他关掉吗 |
| [05:32] | Yeah, try TV/Video or something. | 试着切换下电视/视频什么的 |
| [05:33] | – Yeah, maybe that will work. – With all due respect, | -也许有用 -无意冒犯 |
| [05:35] | there’s no guarantee that humor can sell cat food. | 没有任何证据保证说幽默可以售出猫粮 |
| [05:38] | No, there isn’t. | 是没有 |
| [05:39] | Because advertising is an art, not a science. | 因为广告是艺术 不是科学 |
| [05:41] | It was an art. | 曾经确实是艺术 |
| [05:42] | But quants like me are turning it into a science. | 但我这样的宽客将之变为了科学 |
| [05:45] | Take a look at these graphs. | 看看这些图表 |
| [05:49] | That research clearly states | 这些调研清楚表明 |
| [05:50] | that we should focus on the easy-open can. | 应该聚焦在易开罐这个特点上 |
| [05:52] | So the commercial should be two people standing around | 所以广告中应该是两个人站着 |
| [05:53] | talking about an easy-open can? | 谈论易开罐 |
| [05:55] | That was good. Did you get that down? | 很好 记下来了吗 |
| [05:56] | No, don’t get that down; it wasn’t good. | 别记 一点也不好 |
| [05:57] | It’s annoying and obvious. | 太烦人 太平淡 |
| [05:58] | There’s enough visual pollution in the world. | 这世界上已经有够多的视觉污染了 |
| [06:03] | There’s a billboard on Belmont Avenue | 在贝尔蒙大道上有个广告牌 |
| [06:04] | I did for the Adler Planetarium. | 是我为阿德勒天文馆设计的 |
| [06:06] | The one with the silhouettes of the kids’ faces? | 有孩子脸轮廓的那个吗 |
| [06:08] | Yeah, where real stars shine through at night. | 对 晚上会有真正的星光穿过 |
| [06:10] | It’s a classic. | 太经典了 |
| [06:11] | “Get a Head Full of Stars.” | 让你的头脑充满星光 |
| [06:13] | I never would’ve found it | 如果我听取了调研结果 |
| [06:14] | if I had listened to the research. | 我永远不会想到这点 |
| [06:16] | They wanted me to focus on the reclining seats. | 他们要我聚焦在可躺式座椅这一卖点上 |
| [06:19] | On our best days, | 在广告人的巅峰时代 |
| [06:20] | I want to inspire. | 我想带给人启发 |
| [06:22] | I want to be able to walk down the street, | 我希望能走在街上 |
| [06:24] | look up at my billboard and be proud to say, | 抬头望向我设计的广告牌 骄傲地说 |
| [06:26] | “Simon Roberts Was Here.” | 萨蒙·罗伯茨曾在这里 |
| [06:30] | Look, Simon, you’re the boss, | 萨蒙 你是老板 |
| [06:32] | and if you choose to neglect my data, | 如果你选择无视我的数据 |
| [06:34] | well, that’s your decision. | 那是你的决定 |
| [06:35] | No, it’s obvious that you disagree. | 不 显然你不同意这样 |
| [06:36] | So speak freely as if you’re in a chat room | 所以尽管发言 把这里当作聊天室 |
| [06:38] | full of antisocial virgins. | 里面全是反社会的处女 |
| [06:40] | Fine, your creative ads may start conversations, | 好吧 你的创意广告或许容易与人相通 |
| [06:43] | but I contend my computer generated ads | 但我坚称我的电脑设计广告 |
| [06:45] | are more persuasive any day. | 在任何时候都是更具说服力的 |
| [06:47] | Oh, really? | 是吗 |
| [06:48] | But like I said, we’ll do it your way. | 但正如我刚说的 我们还是按你的方法来 |
| [06:50] | No, no, no, please. I don’t want to win by pulling rank. | 不不 我不希望因为我是老板就说了算 |
| [06:52] | I’m want to win by being better than you, | 我希望我能赢你 是真的比你优秀 |
| [06:53] | then shoving that fact in your face. | 然后把你的脸丢尽 |
| [06:55] | How about a bet? | 不如来赌一局吧 |
| [06:57] | – What’s the wager? – $50,000. | -赌注多少 -5万块 |
| [06:59] | Let’s let the people making the bet decide the stakes. | 让打赌双方来决定赌注大小 |
| [07:01] | – Sorry. – The winner gets | -抱歉 -获胜者将有机会 |
| [07:02] | to pitch his ad to Regal Kitty cat foods. | 将自己的广告推介给御猫猫粮公司 |
| [07:05] | Competition will be a print ad for… | 比赛内容是 做一副平面广告 |
| [07:09] | – ice. – Who’s gonna judge? | -主题是冰 -谁来做裁判 |
| [07:11] | I’m fine with Zach, Andrew and Sydney. | 我觉得扎克 安德鲁和希德妮就可以 |
| [07:13] | That’s unfair, I know everything about them. | 那不公平 我跟他们太熟了 |
| [07:14] | Hell, Sydney’s like a daughter to me. | 天啊 希德妮就跟我女儿一样 |
| [07:16] | That’s how confident I am. | 我就是这么有信心 |
| [08:03] | Uh, are you wearing a fanny pack? | 你是背了个腰包吗 |
| [08:05] | Furthermore, does it say Older Bride magazine on it? | 另外 上面是印了”大龄新娘”杂志的标识吗 |
| [08:07] | Huh, yeah, came with the subscription. | 是啊 订杂志送礼物 |
| [08:09] | It’s actually very functional. | 其实挺实用的 |
| [08:10] | I’m keeping cat treats in it, | 我在里面装了一些猫食 |
| [08:11] | so thank you to whoever signed me up for that. | 不管谁替我订的杂志 都谢谢了 |
| [08:14] | You are not going to trick us into admitting it was us. | 你别想引诱我们承认是我们订的 |
| [08:16] | I know it was you. | 我知道就是你们订的 |
| [08:17] | Do you have any of the peanut butter mice-shaped ones? | 你包里有老鼠形的花生酱块吗 |
| [08:19] | Oh, my God. | 我的天啊 |
| [08:20] | What? I read the box. | 怎么 我看了包装盒 |
| [08:21] | It says human grade, you elitist. | 上面写了人类可食用级别 你个自恃甚高的 |
| [08:24] | All right, everybody. | 好了 大家 |
| [08:25] | Let the judging begin. | 我们开始裁判吧 |
| [08:28] | Whoa, they’re both good. | 哇 都很出色呢 |
| [08:30] | Really good. | 真的很棒 |
| [08:31] | They both make me want ice. | 都激发了我对冰的渴望 |
| [08:32] | But one is more persuasive. | 但其中一个更具说服力 |
| [08:33] | – Clearly. – Right. – Yeah. | -显然啊 -对 -就是啊 |
| [08:35] | And, uh, which one is that? | 那到底是哪个呢 |
| [08:50] | The better ad is Simon’s ad. | 更出色的广告是萨蒙的广告 |
| [08:54] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [08:56] | Which is “Savor the Moment.” | 也就是”品味美好时刻” |
| [08:57] | That’s the best one. | 那是最棒的 |
| [08:58] | So obviously his work. | 显然是他的作品 |
| [09:01] | – Opposite day! – Lies! | -才怪 -刚刚是撒谎 |
| [09:02] | – Through my teeth! – “Nice” Is nicer! | -每个字都在撒谎 -美丽”冻”人要好得多 |
| [09:04] | I like that one. | 我喜欢那一个 |
| [09:05] | – is the “Nice.” – I like that one. | -就是美丽”冻”人那个 -我喜欢那个 |
| [09:05] | Too late. In your face, humans. | 太迟了 汗颜吧 愚蠢的人类 |
| [09:08] | Yes. | 太爽了 |
| [09:11] | Congratulations, Colin. | 恭喜啊 科林 |
| [09:23] | Okay, fine. | 好了 行吧 |
| [09:24] | I’ll go to freaking Lake Tahoe for her stupid wedding, | 我答应去太浩湖参加她该死的婚礼 |
| [09:26] | but then she expects me to dress up | 但她竟然让我穿上这 |
| [09:28] | in this purple Grape Ape dress | 紫色的紫金钢般的裙子[动画人物] |
| [09:30] | to be one of her six bridesmaids. | 去当她的6名伴娘之一 |
| [09:32] | Six bridesmaids? | 6名伴娘 搞什么啊 |
| [09:33] | How do you have six friends? | 怎么会有6个朋友啊 |
| [09:34] | I only have two, and only like one of them. | 我只有2个朋友 而且我只喜欢其中一个 |
| [09:38] | She said to a cat like he’s a person. | 我对着猫唠叨 好像他是个人一样 |
| [09:41] | Okay, Sydney, | 好了 希德妮 |
| [09:42] | you’re going to be late to the Maytag meeting. | 你快来不及参加美泰克公司的会议了 |
| [09:47] | Oh, I forgot my Maytag file. | 噢 我忘了带美泰克客户的档案 |
| [09:51] | Did you just remind me? | 你刚刚是提醒我了吗 |
| [09:54] | Oh, and my lip gloss. | 以及我的唇彩 |
| [09:58] | Less is more. | 淡妆更美 |
| [09:59] | Got it. | 我懂了 |
| [10:01] | Cat. | 猫先生 |
| [10:10] | I feel awful. | 我感觉糟透了 |
| [10:11] | I just hope Simon’s not taking his loss too hard. | 我希望萨蒙不要被这次失败打击得一蹶不振 |
| [10:13] | Hey, Number Three, Number 14. I’ve given everyone numbers | 嘿 3号 14号 我现在给每个人编了个号 |
| [10:16] | so I can quantify their values. | 好把每个人的价值进行量化 |
| [10:17] | I’m One, Sydney’s Two, Zach’s Three. | 我是1号 希德妮是2号 扎克是3号 |
| [10:19] | – And I’m 14. – Don’t read into it. | -我是14号呢 -别曲解我的意思 |
| [10:20] | Hey, Six. | 你好啊 6号 |
| [10:22] | I get that. Water’s the most important meal of the day. | 我懂的 水是一天中最重要的饮食 |
| [10:24] | – Simon, you okay? – Never been better. | -萨蒙 你没事吧 -好得不能再好了 |
| [10:26] | I’m embracing this brave new world. | 我正拥抱这全新的世界呢 |
| [10:28] | Hey, uh, Simon, | 那个 萨蒙 |
| [10:28] | your lightbulb’s been replaced with a math-type thingy. | 你头上的电灯泡被一个数学表格取代了 |
| [10:31] | Math-type thingies are the wave of the future. | 数学模型图是未来的浪潮 |
| [10:33] | Creativity is on its way out. Follow me. | 创意已经滚出广告界了 跟我来 |
| [10:35] | I’m not sure I like Numbers Simon. | 我觉得我好像不太喜欢萨蒙号 |
| [10:37] | Ah, shut it, Number Three. | 闭嘴吧 3号 |
| [10:39] | It’s beautiful, isn’t it? | 真漂亮 不是吗 |
| [10:40] | – Rockwellesque. – Yeah. | -洛克威尔式的插画 -是啊 |
| [10:42] | You know, I’m getting a subtle denial vibe | 其实 我感受到你那个方向传来一种 |
| [10:43] | from that general direction. | 微微的否认的情绪 |
| [10:45] | I am not in denial. | 我没有在否认 |
| [10:45] | And I’m not upset. | 我也没有生气 |
| [10:46] | You don’t see me playing my sad bagpipes, do you? | 你们没见到我演奏悲伤风笛 对吧 |
| [10:48] | What… Dad, I just got a memo. | 怎么回事 老爸 我刚收到一张便签 |
| [10:50] | Did you promote the copier machine | 你刚刚是把一台复印机 |
| [10:52] | – to Head of Communications? – Yes. | -提拔为通讯部主管了吗 -正是 |
| [10:53] | It’s very efficient, doesn’t take breaks, | 它工作效率高 全天无休 |
| [10:54] | and doesn’t complain when I sit on it with no pants. | 我光着屁股坐它身上 它也不会抱怨 |
| [10:56] | In my defense, | 我得为自己辩解一下 |
| [10:57] | you’re heavier than you look. | 我抱怨是因为你可比你看上去重多了 |
| [10:58] | Really? | 真的吗 |
| [10:59] | Dad, I think you’re taking this a little far, okay? | 爸 我觉得你做得有点太过了 |
| [11:01] | I just wanted you to be open to what Colin had to say. | 我只是希望你能坦然听一听来自科林的建议 |
| [11:03] | I don’t want you to stop being you. | 我不希望你彻底改变原来的自己 |
| [11:04] | Colin’s ad was clearly better. | 科林的广告显然要好多了 |
| [11:05] | You guys chose it yourselves. | 你们自己都选了他的 |
| [11:07] | Look, the kid got lucky. | 听着 那家伙恰好走运罢了 |
| [11:08] | No, he got quant-y. | 不 他是靠量化获胜的 |
| [11:09] | He targeted each of you with specific triggers. | 他用明确的元素把你们每个人都俘获了 |
| [11:11] | But I used his own technology against him. | 但我打算以彼之道还施彼身 |
| [11:13] | I downloaded this print out from his computer. | 我从他的电脑里下载了这个 |
| [11:15] | Actually, Dale in IT pressed the buttons | 实际上 是IT部门的戴尔按了下载键 |
| [11:17] | so there’s plausible deniability. | 我可以进行合理的否认 |
| [11:18] | What I’m saying is | 我的意思就是 |
| [11:19] | the quant created a profile for each of you | 那个宽客为你们每个人创建了一份档案 |
| [11:21] | based on your personal Web histories. | 资料来源于你们每个人的网络浏览历史 |
| [11:23] | E-Even sites that we visited in “Private browsing” mode? | 包括那些我们用”无痕浏览”模式访问的网站吗 |
| [11:26] | Yes, Mr. “I visited the Goop web site | 是啊 某人访问”格”调网 |
| [11:27] | eight times in one day.” | 一天达到8次呢 |
| [11:28] | Isn’t that Gwyneth Paltrow’s lifestyle blog? | 那不是格温妮丝·帕特洛的生活方式博客吗 |
| [11:30] | I-I find it useful to know what women are thinking, | 我觉得搞清楚女人在想些什么是很有用的 |
| [11:32] | to get inside their minds. | 要深入她们的大脑中 |
| [11:34] | Also, her avocado hair mask recipe is out of this world. | 而且 她的鳄梨发膜配方简直赞翻了 |
| [11:36] | Hold on. You’re saying that he used this information | 等等 你是说他利用这些信息 |
| [11:38] | to trick us into picking his ad? How? | 来引诱我们选择他的广告 怎么做到的 |
| [11:40] | Let me show you. | 我来给你们展示一下 |
| [11:42] | Notice the melting ice sculpture. | 注意一下这个正在融化的冰雕 |
| [11:44] | So what? It’s just a swan. | 那也没什么啊 就一个天鹅而已 |
| [11:46] | But if I do this… | 但如果我这样盖住呢 |
| [11:49] | The Millennium Falcon. It’s a trap. | 千年隼号 这是个陷阱 |
| [11:50] | Yesterday you posted a file on | 昨天你在星战迷的粉丝网站上 |
| [11:52] | the Star Wars fan fic Web site | 建了一份个人档案 |
| [11:53] | entitled “The Continuing Adventures of Andrew Skywalker”” | 名为”安德鲁·天行者的持续探险” |
| [11:57] | A lesser-known but pivotal character | 那是星球大战众神当中 |
| [11:58] | in the Star Wars pantheon. | 一个不为人熟知但却很关键的角色 |
| [11:59] | And, Zach, you Googled yourself 20 times in three days. | 扎克 你3天内谷歌了自己20次 |
| [12:04] | What do you notice about this couple? | 你注意到这对小情侣有什么特别之处吗 |
| [12:06] | – They both kind of look like me. – Bingo. | -他们长得都有点像我 -答对了 |
| [12:09] | I-I knew that there was a reason I liked them. | 我就知道我很喜欢他们是有什么原因的 |
| [12:11] | And, Sydney… | 希德妮 |
| [12:12] | notice the woman is wearing a wedding ring on her left hand? | 你注意到这位女士左手上戴了一枚婚戒吗 |
| [12:15] | That’s because on the night of the 17th, | 那是因为在17号那天晚上 |
| [12:17] | you went online and subscribed to Older Bride magazine. | 你上网订了《大龄新娘》杂志 |
| [12:21] | The-the night of the 17th was the night | 17号那天晚上就是 |
| [12:23] | that we all stayed late for Stacy’s bachelorette. | 我们在斯黛希的单身派对上玩到很晚的那晚 |
| [12:25] | I-I got drunk and I called her a lucky bitch | 我喝醉了 想说她是幸运的小贱人 |
| [12:27] | and then I just shortened it to bitch. | 然后说出口的只有”贱人”二字 |
| [12:28] | And then you ordered the magazine | 然后你订阅了杂志 |
| [12:29] | you accused us of ordering for you. | 你还指责是我们帮你订的呢 |
| [12:31] | Well, I was drunk! I don’t remember! | 我当时喝醉了 人家不记得了啦 |
| [12:32] | How’s it feel to be cleared of all charges, butch? | 所有的指控都被洗白了 感觉如何 汉子 |
| [12:34] | I gotta tell you, Sundance, it feels pretty darn good. | 我告诉你 帅哥 感觉爽极了 |
| [12:37] | – What else does this thing say? – No, no! | -那上面还说了什么 -不 不 |
| [12:38] | Just a lot of boring stuff… | 就很多无聊的东西 |
| [12:39] | No, want to know what Colin had to say. | 不 我想知道科林到底总结出了什么 |
| [12:41] | “Short term analysis: female customer | “短期分析: 女性客户 |
| [12:43] | is likely to own a cat”” | 很可能会养猫” |
| [12:45] | Well, I guess I’ve taken a liking to Mr. Princess. | 我觉得我是有点开始喜欢公主先生了 |
| [12:47] | – Sydney, you don’t want to… – No, I want | -希德妮 你不会想… -不 我想 |
| [12:48] | – to read this. – Okeydokey. | -看看这个 -那好吧 |
| [12:49] | “Long term analysis: female customer’s | “长期分析 女性客户 |
| [12:52] | devotion to career will | 对事业的全力以赴 |
| [12:53] | likely keep her from having offspring | 可能会阻碍她生儿育女 |
| [12:54] | “or forming lasting romantic partnerships. | 或拥有长期的恋爱关系 |
| [12:56] | She will likely remain single until death”? | 她很可能会孤独终老” |
| [12:59] | Don’t blame me. Blame the data. | 别怪我 怪数据去吧 |
| [13:01] | These are just statistics based upon your behaviors. | 那些都是根据你行为做出的统计数据 |
| [13:03] | But this doesn’t have to be your future. | 但你的未来不一定是这样的 |
| [13:04] | You can affect change. | 你可以引入改变 |
| [13:06] | – How? – First of all, | -怎么做 -首先 |
| [13:07] | I’d consider giving up this whole cat ownership idea. | 我劝你放弃养猫的念头吧 |
| [13:10] | I don’t own a cat. What makes you think that? | 我才没有猫呢 你怎么会这么想 |
| [13:11] | The fanny pack full of cat treats | 你腰包里装满的猫食 |
| [13:13] | and the feather tied to a tiny fishing pole | 以及你后面口袋里伸出的 |
| [13:14] | sticking out of your back pocket. | 微型钓竿上的羽毛就是证据 |
| [13:15] | I may have been considering it. | 我或许确实考虑过 |
| [13:18] | What you’re about to see | 你们即将看到的 |
| [13:19] | is 100% computer generated. | 是百分百的电脑产物 |
| [13:21] | Oh, I love computers. | 我爱电脑 |
| [13:23] | Now show me the future of advertising! | 现在就向我展示广告业的未来吧 |
| [13:26] | *Regal Kitty has an easy-open can* | *御猫猫粮有轻松易拉罐* |
| [13:28] | *The can that’s easy to open* | *罐头轻松拉* |
| [13:30] | *Easy-open can* | *轻松易拉罐* |
| [13:32] | *The can that’s easy to open* | *罐头轻松拉* |
| [13:34] | *Easy-open can* | *轻松易拉罐* |
| [13:35] | *You can open it easily* | *轻松打开易拉罐* |
| [13:42] | What do you say to that, huh? | 该如何评价这广告呢 |
| [13:44] | What do you say? | 该如何评价呢 |
| [13:45] | Tell him how you really feel, Simon. | 告诉他你的真实想法 萨蒙 |
| [13:47] | Come back from the dark side, old Skywalker. | 从暗黑边界回来吧 老天行者 |
| [13:49] | I’ll say this: | 我要说 |
| [13:50] | What I just saw is not leaving this brain anytime soon, | 我刚刚看到的视频 简直余音绕脑三日不绝 |
| [13:52] | that’s for damn sure. | 那是肯定的 |
| [13:53] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [13:54] | No, no, no! Thank you! | 不不不 谢谢你 |
| [13:56] | That piece of… work is going to be so effective | 这则…作品将会有效促进 |
| [13:58] | at selling a lot of cat food. | 卖出大量猫粮 |
| [14:00] | Hell of a job, Quanty! | 干得好 宽哥 |
| [14:01] | Mission accomplished. | 任务完成 |
| [14:02] | George W. Bush! | 乔治·W·布什 |
| [14:06] | Wait for it… | 等着吧 |
| [14:08] | Wait for it. | 等着吧 |
| [14:11] | And there it is. | 开始了 |
| [15:19] | You see? She’s dating that cat. | 你看 她在跟那只猫约会 |
| [15:22] | You got me. | 你赢了 |
| [15:43] | Thank you, boys. | 谢谢 小伙子们 |
| [15:45] | 让你的头脑充满星光 萨蒙·罗伯茨曾在这里 | |
| [15:48] | I did that. | 那是我做的 |
| [15:50] | You did that? | 你做的 |
| [15:51] | Yes, I did. | 没错 是我 |
| [15:53] | You’re Simon Roberts? | 你是萨蒙·罗伯茨 |
| [15:55] | I’m Simon Roberts. | 我是萨蒙·罗伯茨 |
| [15:57] | Simon Roberts, you’re under arrest. | 萨蒙·罗伯茨 你被捕了 |
| [16:00] | Oh, you’re a cop. | 你是警察呀 |
| [16:01] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [16:01] | – And you’re a graffiti artist. – Yeah. | -你是个涂鸦艺术家 -没错 |
| [16:16] | Hey, you. | 早啊 |
| [16:19] | I didn’t order coffee. | 我没要咖啡啊 |
| [16:20] | I just wanted to brighten up your morning. | 我只是想让你早上高兴点 |
| [16:22] | You know it might be a tough one | 我怕你今天早上会难过 |
| [16:23] | with it being Mr. Princess’ last day and all. | 毕竟今天是公主先生在这里的最后一天 |
| [16:27] | I like the cat, | 我喜欢那猫 |
| [16:28] | but it’s just a cat. | 但它终归只是一只猫 |
| [16:30] | I’ll be okay. | 我会没事的 |
| [16:30] | Oh, no, sure. I know. | 对啊 当然了 我知道 |
| [16:33] | It’s just… I’m friends with the security guard | 我跟保安是朋友 |
| [16:36] | and he e-mailed me the footage from your date last night. | 他昨晚把你约会的视频电邮给我了 |
| [16:38] | At first I thought it was funny, | 刚开始我觉得很有趣 |
| [16:39] | which is why I cut in some Barry White | 所以我插入了一些巴里·怀特的音乐 |
| [16:40] | and sent it around the office. | 然后发给全办公室的人看了 |
| [16:42] | Excuse me? | 你说什么 |
| [16:43] | But I just watched it again with the guys in accounting. | 但我刚刚跟会计部的人又看了一遍 |
| [16:46] | It’s actually really touching. | 那情景其实非常令人同情 |
| [16:47] | So I’m here if you need to talk about anything. | 所以如果你想聊聊 我随时奉陪 |
| [16:49] | Lauren, you’re being absolutely ridiculous. | 劳伦 你实在太荒唐了 |
| [16:50] | Hey, you. | 早啊 |
| [16:51] | Brought you something. | 给你带了些东西 |
| [16:53] | Oh, my God, you people! | 天呐 你们这些人 |
| [16:56] | *Easy-open can* | *轻松易拉罐* |
| [16:57] | *You can open it easily* | *轻松打开易拉罐* |
| [17:05] | Ooh, it’s so, uh, ooh… | 真是非常… |
| [17:08] | on the nose. | 直击要点 |
| [17:09] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [17:10] | All right. Where is Simon? | 好吧 萨蒙在哪里 |
| [17:12] | He… couldn’t be here. | 他来不了 |
| [17:15] | Something very important came up. | 出了点很重要的事 |
| [17:17] | I was in jail! | 我被关起来了 |
| [17:18] | I was busted for graffiti. | 因为涂鸦被捕了 |
| [17:19] | I swear I was innocent. | 我发誓我是无辜的 |
| [17:21] | – We are so sorry. – Sorry… | -我们很抱歉 -对不起啊 |
| [17:22] | Don’t be. | 千万别 |
| [17:23] | It was a beautiful gesture. | 你们画的很漂亮 |
| [17:25] | – Learn your parts, okay? – Okay. | -快速学一下你们那段好吗 -好 |
| [17:27] | Anastasia! | 安娜斯塔莎 |
| [17:28] | Yes, honey. | 在 亲爱的 |
| [17:28] | This is my cell mate, | 这是我的狱友 |
| [17:30] | Anastasia. | 安娜斯塔莎 |
| [17:31] | We share a probation officer | 我们的假释官是同一人 |
| [17:32] | and a love of high heels. | 我们还都很喜欢高跟鞋 |
| [17:34] | She’s a gifted graphic artist. | 她是一个天赋异禀的平面设计师 |
| [17:36] | I have degrees from two different art schools. | 我有两所不同的艺术院校颁发的学位 |
| [17:38] | And only one felony conviction. | 只有一项重罪指控 |
| [17:39] | Simon, where is this going? | 萨蒙 这是要干什么 |
| [17:41] | Last night, when I was in jail, | 昨晚 我在监狱里 |
| [17:43] | Anastasia showed me a lot of things. | 安娜斯塔莎向我展示了很多东西 |
| [17:44] | – Like…? – Like how easy it is to forge a check. | -比如 -比如伪造支票是多么简单 |
| [17:47] | Also, when you combine two things that don’t go together– | 还有 将两个风马牛不相及的东西结合起来 |
| [17:48] | like boobs and a bulge, | 比如咪咪和鸡鸡 |
| [17:50] | or creativity and research– | 以及创意和调研 |
| [17:51] | you get something special. Hit it. | 你会创造出特别的东西 开始吧 |
| [17:57] | Regal Kitty cat food has an easy-open can. | 御猫猫粮有种轻松易拉罐 |
| [17:59] | You can open them. | 你能打开罐头 |
| [18:00] | Can. | 能[罐头] |
| [18:01] | The other brand’s? Not so easy to open. | 其他牌子呢 就没这么容易打开了 |
| [18:03] | Can’t. | 不能 |
| [18:04] | Can. | 能 |
| [18:06] | Can’t. | 不能 |
| [18:07] | Can. | 能 |
| [18:09] | Can’t. | 不能 |
| [18:10] | Can. | 能 |
| [18:12] | Can’t. | 不能 |
| [18:13] | Can. | 能 |
| [18:14] | Can’t. | 不能 |
| [18:16] | *Re-gal Ki-tty* | *御猫猫粮* |
| [18:18] | *Has an easy-open can* | *有种轻松易拉罐* |
| [18:19] | *Re-gal Ki-tty* | *御猫猫粮* |
| [18:20] | *Easy-open can* | *轻松易拉罐* |
| [18:21] | *Can, can, can, can, can, can* | *能 能 能 能 能 能* |
| [18:24] | Cut to a chorus line of cats doing the cancan! | 切换到一群猫排成合唱队形跳康康舞 |
| [18:32] | Quanty, get in there. You’re part of the team, buddy. | 宽哥 过去 你也是团队一员 伙计 |
| [18:37] | The Dancing Cats, mes amis! | 跳舞的猫咪 我的朋友们 |
| [18:39] | – I love it. – Aren’t they amazing, people? | -我喜欢 -是不是很棒啊 各位 |
| [18:41] | – Fabuleux, eh? – I love it! | -棒极了 -我喜欢 |
| [18:47] | I “Can-can’t” wait to see the finished commercial. | 我简直”迫不能待”地想看到成品广告 |
| [18:50] | Judy. | 朱迪 |
| [18:52] | There you go. | 给您 |
| [18:55] | You fell in love with this little guy, didn’t you? | 你爱上这个小家伙了 是吧 |
| [18:58] | Love’s kind of strong. I mean, he’s okay. | “爱”这个词太过了 不过他是挺好的 |
| [19:00] | Hey, there’s no shame in admitting how you “Feline”” | 嘿 承认自己的”爱猫之感”并没有什么丢人的 |
| [19:03] | Yeah. Got it in twice. | 哎呀 我又用了谐音词 |
| [19:05] | Boom. | 好赞 |
| [19:09] | Good-bye, you. | 再见啦 |
| [19:13] | You wanted to keep him. | 你想养它吧 |
| [19:15] | You know it. | 你知道的 |
| [19:17] | But you also saw the data. | 但你也看到数据了 |
| [19:18] | Owning a cat was my first step | 养猫是我迈向孤独老死 |
| [19:20] | toward dying alone and unloved. | 无人爱的第一步 |
| [19:22] | Some things in life aren’t quantifiable. | 生活中有些事情是不能量化的 |
| [19:24] | The future is one of them. | 未来就是其中之一 |
| [19:26] | You really think I’ll beat the odds? | 你真的认为我成功的机会比较大吗 |
| [19:28] | Yeah, if you follow your heart. | 当然 如果你遵从内心想法 |
| [19:29] | Now go get your fur-ball. | 去找你的毛球吧 |
| [19:33] | Thanks, Dad. | 谢谢 老爸 |
| [19:34] | Excuse me… | 稍等一下 |
| [19:45] | This is your new hallway. | 这是你的新走廊 |
| [19:47] | And this is your new forever home. | 这是你新的永远的家 |
| [19:50] | Who knows, might just be mine, too. | 谁知道呢 也可能是我的 |
| [19:53] | Just the two of us. | 就我们俩相依为命 |
| [19:55] | I’m, uh, your new neighbor. | 我是你的新邻居 |
| [19:57] | Hi. I’m Sydney. | 你好 我叫希德妮 |
| [19:59] | I work in advertising. | 我从事广告业 |
| [19:59] | I work a lot, and I own a cat. | 工作狂 还养了只猫 |
| [20:02] | I’m Dylan. I’m a vet. | 我叫迪伦 是个兽医[老兵] |
| [20:04] | Oh, thank you for your service. | 噢 感谢你为国奉献 |
| [20:06] | No, I’m a veterinarian. | 不 我是个兽医师 |
| [20:08] | God, that keeps happening. | 天呐 经常这样 |
| [20:08] | I gotta start saying the whole word. | 看来我得开始说完整了 |
| [20:11] | Well, in that case, | 这样的话 |
| [20:11] | this is, um, Mr. Princess. | 这是 公主先生 |
| [20:14] | Hello, big guy. | 你好啊 大家伙 |
| [20:18] | It’s nice to meet you. | 很高兴认识你 |
| [20:20] | Nice to meet you, too. | 我也是 |
| [20:37] | Okay, let’s do this. | 好了 来吧 |
| [20:39] | Jimmy has to button up his shirt, | 吉米得把他的衬衫扣起来 |
| [20:41] | ’cause he unbuttoned it. | 因为他刚刚解开了 |
| [20:42] | “Oh, let me just take all this off.” | 让我全脱了吧 |
| [20:43] | “Hold on, let me get out off these… | 等等 让我脱了这条 |
| [20:44] | these damn pants.” | 这条该死的裤子 |
| [20:45] | I seem to need this underwear to be gone | 我好像得把内裤脱了 |
| [20:47] | to get myself room to pee. | 这样才能撒尿 |
| [20:52] | Yeah, that was good. | 就这样 刚刚挺不错 |
| [20:53] | – Ice… – Ice… | -冰 -冰 |
| [20:56] | Ice… Ice… | 冰 冰 |
| [20:58] | Ice is here to stay, yay, yay! | 冰要在这里留下来 耶耶 |
| [20:59] | Don’t know it, so be bold! | 不知情的话 大胆跳起来 |
| [21:02] | Come on now, work away from the cold! | 一起来吧 甩掉冰冷的感觉 |
| [21:05] | That was good. | 真不错 |