| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:00] | Back in the day, trick-or-treating was my jam. | 想当年 不给糖就捣蛋是我的最爱 |
| [00:03] | I’d spend months making the most epic Holloween costumes | 我会花上数月时间做八十年代流行的 |
| [00:05] | the ’80s had ever seen. | 万圣节装扮服 |
| [00:07] | I was a master of tape and glue-gunning. | 我是胶带和胶水枪大师 |
| [00:09] | My costumes were not only awesome, | 我的装扮服不仅很棒 |
| [00:11] | but they were also topical. | 更是紧跟时代潮流 |
| [00:13] | I’m the coolest E.T. ever. | 我是最酷的外星人 |
| [00:15] | And I’m Elliot, E.T.’s owner! | 我是埃利奥特 外星人的主人 |
| [00:17] | …Until my mom turned them into couples costumes. | 直到我妈将之变成配对装扮服 |
| [00:20] | Look out, Jenkintown. | 小心了 珍金镇 |
| [00:21] | Here comes a ghostbuster! | 捉鬼敢死队来了 |
| [00:23] | It was embarrassing. | 真是令人觉得尴尬 |
| [00:25] | And I’m his stay puft marshmallow mom. | 我是他的棉花糖人妈妈 |
| [00:27] | And every year, it got worse. | 一年比一年糟糕 |
| [00:29] | Freeze, creep. I’m Robocop. | 不许动 变态 我是机械战警 |
| [00:32] | And I’m ED-209, omnicorp’s first foray into robotic policing. | 我是ED209 奥米集团对机器人警察的第一次突袭 |
| [00:37] | I’m Indy! | 我是印第安纳·琼斯 |
| [00:38] | …And it got more frustrating. | 越发的令人无语 |
| [00:40] | And I’m Mork. | 我是默克 |
| [00:41] | I thought you said you were going as Mindy. | 我以为你说你会扮成明蒂 |
| [00:43] | Why would I be going as Mindy? | 我为什么要扮成明蒂 |
| [00:45] | Well, I guess we’re Mork and Indy. | 那我们就是默克与印第 |
| [00:48] | But not this year. | 但今年别想 |
| [00:49] | My girl was in town, and she’d be the Ripley to my Alien. | 我的女友回来了 她是里普利我是异形 |
| [00:52] | I love us. | 我爱我们 |
| [00:53] | Me too. | 我也是 |
| [00:54] | Which I why I want you to have this. | 所以我要把这个给你 |
| [00:57] | Oh, my god. | 我的天 |
| [00:59] | Our promise ring. | 我们的承诺戒指 |
| [01:00] | I know you gave it back when you moved, | 你搬走时还给我了 |
| [01:02] | but I think we’ve proved nothing can stand between us. | 但我想我们证明了没什么可以插在我们之间 |
| [01:07] | Hey, boopie. | 宝贝儿 |
| [01:08] | What the hell?! | 搞什么 |
| [01:08] | It’s me. It’s mama. I’m the Predator. | 是我 妈妈 我是掠夺者 |
| [01:13] | Stop it. | 停下 |
| [01:14] | The predator doesn’t talk with smooches. | 掠夺者不会发出亲亲的声音 |
| [01:16] | He clicks. | 他发出滴答的声音 |
| [01:17] | Well, this predator kisses instead of kills. | 这个掠夺者只亲亲不杀人 |
| [01:20] | You’re ruining the property. | 你把角色全毁了 |
| [01:21] | Or is preda-mom making it better? | “掠夺妈”会不会更好一些 |
| [01:24] | I told you, this year, I’m doing a couples costume | 我跟你说过了 今年我要和 |
| [01:26] | with the person I’m actually in a couple with. | 实际与我是一对的人 穿配对装扮服 |
| [01:29] | Hi, Mrs. Goldberg. | 你好 金伯格太太 |
| [01:30] | Dana. Look. | 戴娜 听我说 |
| [01:32] | Your alien movie has nothing to do with my costume, | 你的异形电影和我的装扮服没关系 |
| [01:35] | at least not that I know of. | 反正我不知道 |
| [01:37] | God. | 老天 |
| [01:38] | What? | 什么 |
| [01:39] | Oh, my god. What is — | 老天 这是什么 |
| [01:40] | It’s your favorite comic book, “Alien versus Predator”? | 这是你最喜欢的漫画书 《异形大战掠夺者》 |
| [01:44] | Now, when did these two get to know each other? | 这两个家伙什么时候碰到一起的 |
| [01:46] | You said our costume was mom-proof. | 你说过我们的装扮服是”防妈的” |
| [01:48] | I forgot about the crossover. | 我忘了跨电影的 |
| [01:50] | This is a very happy coincidence. | 这个巧合太令人高兴了 |
| [01:52] | We’re gonna make quite the trio. | 我们三个一起太棒了 |
| [01:54] | No. You are not following us around tonight in that costume. | 不 今晚不允许你穿这身跟着我们 |
| [01:57] | You want me to follow you around without a costume? | 你要我不穿装扮服跟着你们吗 |
| [01:59] | Come on. I’m gonna look crazy. | 拜托 我会看起来像疯子一样 |
| [02:01] | I don’t need my mom’s help to go trick-or-treating. | 我不需要妈妈帮忙玩不给糖就捣蛋 |
| [02:04] | I’m going with Dana. | 我和戴娜一起去 |
| [02:05] | Not you. | 不是你 |
| [02:06] | Oh. Okay. | 那好吧 |
| [02:08] | I guess I’ll just go. | 我想我走人好了 |
| [02:11] | Have a good time without me. | 祝你们在没我的情况下玩得愉快 |
| [02:14] | If you need me, just call my name… | 如果需要我 叫我的名字 |
| [02:16] | For anything. | 任何需要 |
| [02:19] | Or I could just stay if you want. | 你想的话我可以留下 |
| [02:22] | Did someone call me? | 有人叫我了吗 |
| [02:23] | I thought I heard, “please don’t go.” | 我想我听到了 “请别走” |
| [02:25] | No? | 没说吗 |
| [02:27] | Is there another way out of here? | 这里还有别的出口吗 |
| [02:29] | Nope. | 没 |
| [02:32] | Call if you need me. | 有需要就叫我 |
| [02:47] | It was October 31, 1980-something, | 那是一九八几年的10月31日 |
| [02:50] | and my siblings were hard at work | 我的哥哥姐姐正努力制定 |
| [02:52] | strategizing how to beat Halloween. | 玩转万圣节的战略 |
| [02:54] | Okay, here’s our path through Jenkintown. | 好的 这是我们玩遍珍金镇的路线 |
| [02:56] | First, we hit Tom Mcfadden’s kegger, | 首先 去汤姆·麦克法登的啤酒派对 |
| [02:58] | then we head north and hit these three parties. | 然后向北参加这三场派对 |
| [03:01] | Ooh, are you planning a candy route? | 你们在计划糖果路线吗 |
| [03:02] | We should combine our data. | 应该和我们的结合在一起 |
| [03:04] | – May I? – You may. | -我可以吗 -可以 |
| [03:05] | Nerd punch! | 呆子拳 |
| [03:07] | What was that for? | 为什么呀 |
| [03:08] | Dude! Your girlfriend came across the ocean to be with you. | 小弟 你女友跨过大洋来见你 |
| [03:11] | Dana lives in Seattle. | 戴娜住在西雅图 |
| [03:12] | Exactly. Do you really think | 就是 你真觉得 |
| [03:14] | she wants to spend her one night in America | 她愿意把待在美国的一晚时间 |
| [03:16] | collecting candy like a little toddler? | 用来像小宝宝一样要糖果吗 |
| [03:17] | But that’s w-what we always do. | 但我们一直是这样玩的 |
| [03:19] | It’s what you did. You’re adults now. | 那是以前 你现在是成年人了 |
| [03:22] | Just listen to your deep, yet still high weird voice. | 听听你这深沉又尖锐的奇怪声音吧 |
| [03:24] | Hurtful, but continue. | 伤人 但继续说 |
| [03:26] | It’s Halloween, dude — a night for romance. | 这是万圣节 小弟 浪漫之夜 |
| [03:29] | This holiday’s all about girls getting scared | 这个节日的精髓就是女生害怕了 |
| [03:31] | and running to a big, strong man for protection. | 奔向高大强壮的男生寻求保护 |
| [03:33] | It’s evolution. | 这是进化 |
| [03:35] | Idiot punch. | 白痴拳 |
| [03:36] | But he’s got a point. | 但他说的有道理 |
| [03:38] | We do pretend to be scared to make it easy for boys | 我们的确假装害怕 令男生们好做一些 |
| [03:40] | because we feel bad for them. | 因为我们挺同情他们的 |
| [03:41] | Wow. Okay. | 那好吧 |
| [03:42] | So I should take her someplace scary. | 我应该带她到吓人的地方去 |
| [03:44] | Like Jcpenney? | 彭尼百货行吗 |
| [03:45] | What? | 什么 |
| [03:46] | They put a bunch of spider webs up in their mattress display. | 他们在床垫展示区挂了不少蜘蛛网 |
| [03:49] | You know they’re fake, but they make you think, | 你知道那是假的 但令你浮想联翩 |
| [03:51] | “What if my bed had spiders?” | “万一我的床上有蜘蛛呢” |
| [03:53] | Oh, my god, no. | 老天 不行 |
| [03:55] | There’s a frat at Villanova | 维拉诺瓦大学的兄弟会 |
| [03:56] | that runs an awesome haunted house. | 搞了一个不错的鬼屋 |
| [03:57] | Take her there. | 带她过去 |
| [03:58] | What? You want me to pay money to get tortured | 什么 你要我在糖果免费的情况下 |
| [04:01] | when candy is free? | 付钱找虐吗 |
| [04:02] | Nut up, bro. | 疯狂一下 小弟 |
| [04:03] | It’s just a stupid haunted house. | 只是愚蠢的鬼屋而已 |
| [04:05] | You’ll be fine. | 你不会有事的 |
| [04:06] | Hey. Ready to head out? | 准备好出发了吗 |
| [04:08] | Uh, yeah. Question. | 是的 问一下 |
| [04:10] | What would you rather do tonight — | 你今晚想做什么 |
| [04:11] | Get unlimited free nougaty candy… | 去拿无限量的免费糖果 |
| [04:14] | …or go to a haunted house? | 还是去鬼屋 |
| [04:16] | What? | 什么 |
| [04:16] | Or go to a haunted house? | 还是去鬼屋 |
| [04:17] | What? | 什么 |
| [04:18] | Free candy? | 免费糖果 |
| [04:20] | Or go to a lame haunted house — super-boring? | 还是去什么差劲的鬼屋 很没劲的 |
| [04:23] | A haunted house does sound cool, | 鬼屋听起来挺酷的 |
| [04:25] | although, I might need you to protect me. | 不过 我可能需要你保护我 |
| [04:27] | Told you. | 跟你说过啦 |
| [04:28] | Haunted house it is. | 那就去鬼屋 |
| [04:30] | Hopefully they have friendly ghosts like Casper. | 希望那里有鬼马小精灵一样友善的鬼 |
| [04:32] | Actually, Casper weirds me out, too. | 其实鬼马小精灵也让我害怕 |
| [04:34] | Nerd punch! | 呆子拳 |
| [04:37] | As I was facing my first grown-up Halloween, | 我面对第一个成年人万圣节时 |
| [04:39] | my mom was facing her first one alone. | 我妈正面对她第一个孤单的万圣节 |
| [04:42] | What are you up to? | 你在做什么 |
| [04:43] | Hiding a deadly razor in some candy. | 在糖果里藏致命的剃刀 |
| [04:47] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [04:47] | Don’t you judge me. | 不要评判我 |
| [04:49] | I’m just creating a visual aid | 我只是在创造视觉效果 |
| [04:50] | to show Adam the dangers of getting candy from strangers | 让亚当看到没有妈妈的情况下 向陌生人拿糖果 |
| [04:54] | without his mother. | 有多危险 |
| [04:54] | See? This used to be fun-size. | 瞧 这个本来是小糖果条 |
| [04:57] | Now it’s terror-size. | 现在是吓人糖果条 |
| [04:59] | You know what’s terrifying? | 你知道什么吓人吗 |
| [05:01] | The fact that you still want to go trick-or-treating | 你依然想穿着配对装扮服 |
| [05:03] | in matching costumes with your almost-adult son. | 和你快成年的儿子一起去玩不给糖就捣蛋 |
| [05:06] | I don’t want to. | 我也不想 |
| [05:08] | I have to for his safety. | 但为了他的安全我必须这样做 |
| [05:10] | Halloween is a night where gangs of street toughs | 万圣节的晚上 街头恶霸会在 |
| [05:13] | roam the sidewalks looking to rough up children | 人行道上晃悠 准备对孩子们动粗 |
| [05:16] | and take their candy. | 抢走他们的糖果 |
| [05:18] | Street toughs? | 街头恶霸 |
| [05:19] | In Jenkintown? | 在珍金镇 |
| [05:20] | They drive in. | 他们开车来的 |
| [05:22] | And don’t even get me started on the kidnappers. | 我还没说那些绑匪呢 |
| [05:24] | They hitch a ride with the street toughs. | 他们搭街头恶霸的顺风车来的 |
| [05:25] | So they’re all carpooling. | 他们还是拼车来的 |
| [05:26] | Maybe they’re taking the bus. | 也许他们坐大巴来的 |
| [05:28] | What kind of bus is this? | 这是哪门子的大巴 |
| [05:29] | The point is, I don’t do this for me. | 重点是 我这样做不是为自己 |
| [05:31] | Trick-or-treating is a nightmare, | 不给糖就捣蛋是场噩梦 |
| [05:33] | and I can’t wait for Adam to give it up. | 我等不及亚当放弃的那天 |
| [05:35] | Hey, ma, me and Dana decided | 妈 戴娜和我决定 |
| [05:37] | to go to a haunted house this year. | 今年去鬼屋 |
| [05:39] | We’ll be back by 9:00. | 我们9点回来 |
| [05:40] | But what about trick-or-treating? | 那不给糖就捣蛋呢 |
| [05:42] | I have a visual aid to prove a point | 我还做了视觉教具来证明我的观点 |
| [05:43] | that now doesn’t matter. | 现在根本不重要了 |
| [05:45] | Yeah, we’re over it. | 我们不想玩了 |
| [05:46] | But — we always — | 但 我们一直 |
| [05:50] | We al– we always — | 我们一 我们一直 |
| [05:53] | Candy. | 糖果 |
| [05:54] | Just go. | 去吧 |
| [05:57] | Well, there you go, Bevy. | 这下好了 贝弗 |
| [05:59] | Nightmare’s over. | 噩梦结束了 |
| [06:00] | Yeah. This is just what I wanted. | 对 这正是我想要的 |
| [06:04] | Maybe I’ll make myself useful by dusting | 也许我给自己找点事做 比如说打扫 |
| [06:06] | or by…sitting in my room in the dark | 或是关灯坐在我的房间里 |
| [06:10] | to save on electricity. | 省电 |
| [06:12] | I’ll figure something out. | 我会想到的 |
| [06:16] | Could I eat that? | 我可以吃这个吗 |
| [06:19] | Well, that’s never stopped me before. | 反正以前这样也吃过 |
| [06:21] | Moron! | 白痴 |
| [06:22] | There’s a razor in it. | 里面有剃刀 |
| [06:24] | You win this round, old man. | 这回合你赢了 老头子 |
| [06:28] | While my mom’s Halloween was falling apart, | 我妈妈的万圣节支离破碎时 |
| [06:30] | mine was coming together. | 我的开始走上正轨 |
| [06:33] | I love this ring. | 我好喜欢这个戒指 |
| [06:34] | I’ll never take it off again. | 我再也不会取下来了 |
| [06:36] | Besides being a beautiful symbol of our love, | 它除了是我们爱的美好象征以外 |
| [06:38] | that bad boy really makes your eyes pop. | 更能衬得你眼睛漂亮 |
| [06:44] | I didn’t think this was gonna be so scary. | 我觉得不会太可怕的 |
| [06:47] | Don’t worry, girl. Ad-rock’s here to protect you. | 别担心 姑娘 有我亚当保护你 |
| [06:50] | Yep, I was the man. | 没错 我是男子汉 |
| [06:52] | In that moment, I couldn’t believe | 在那一刻 我不敢相信 |
| [06:53] | I ever doubted Barry and Erica. | 我居然怀疑巴瑞和爱丽卡 |
| [06:56] | And then a moment later, I remembered why I did. | 过了片刻 我记起了怀疑的原因 |
| [07:01] | But since this was all for love, | 但既然这是为了爱 |
| [07:03] | I knew I could handle some cobwebs and fog… | 我想我可以应对一些蛛网和雾 |
| [07:08] | …but not a werewolf… | 但狼人不行 |
| [07:09] | …or a dude with a chainsaw. | 或是拿电锯的家伙 |
| [07:11] | And so I used Dana as a human shield… | 于是我把戴娜当作人肉盾牌 |
| [07:13] | Balls, balls, balls, balls! | 该死的 该死的 |
| [07:15] | …and then ditched her and ran for my life. | 然后抛下她逃命去了 |
| [07:20] | Oh. Hey. Lost you in there. Sup? | 在里面和你走散了 还好吗 |
| [07:22] | Hopefully she didn’t notice. | 只希望她没注意到 |
| [07:23] | You used me as a human shield. | 你把我当作人肉盾牌 |
| [07:25] | She noticed. | 她注意到了 |
| [07:26] | Babe, it — it was just a goof. | 宝贝 那只是好玩 |
| [07:27] | As you ran out, you screamed “kill her, not me!” | 你逃命的时候大叫 “杀她 别杀我” |
| [07:30] | You got to commit hard to the bit, right? | 做戏做全套嘛 |
| [07:33] | Oh, god. | 我的天 |
| [07:34] | My ring’s gone. | 我的戒指不见了 |
| [07:35] | I must have lost it back there. | 肯定是掉在里面了 |
| [07:37] | You got to go get it for me. | 你得为我找回来 |
| [07:39] | Can I just get you a new one? | 我送你一枚新的好吗 |
| [07:42] | I lied about it making your eyes pop. | 我说衬得你眼睛漂亮是骗你的 |
| [07:43] | It makes them look gross. | 其实看起来好恶心 |
| [07:45] | Whatever. | 随便吧 |
| [07:47] | Are you mad? | 你生气了吗 |
| [07:48] | No. | 不 |
| [07:49] | I’m just tired. | 我只是累了 |
| [07:51] | I actually think I’m gonna go. | 我想走了 |
| [07:53] | Happy Halloween. | 万圣节快乐 |
| [07:58] | She’s not tired, bro. | 她不累 伙计 |
| [07:59] | It can taaaalk! | 它会说话 |
| [08:02] | While my Halloween had turned sour, | 我的万圣节令人失望时 |
| [08:04] | pops was busy handing out sweets. | 老爷子正忙着派糖果 |
| [08:06] | Ooh! Look at you! | 瞧你们 |
| [08:08] | It’s spider-guy, strawberry flapjacks, and hey! | 蜘蛛人 草莓煎饼 瞧 |
| [08:12] | It’s Herman the frog. | 还有青蛙赫尔曼 |
| [08:14] | Wokkity! Wokkity! | 呱呱 呱呱 |
| [08:16] | Everything you’re saying is wrong. | 你说的全错了 |
| [08:18] | Enjoy! | 慢慢吃 |
| [08:21] | Oh, there she is. Happy Halloween, pumpkin! | 她在这里啊 万圣节快乐 小南瓜 |
| [08:25] | There will be no more happy Halloweens, | 万圣节不再快乐了 |
| [08:27] | not if I can’t be out there with my little nub-nub. | 我不能和我的小包包出去就不快乐了 |
| [08:29] | I assume that’s Adam. | 我想你指的是亚当 |
| [08:31] | Adam is my nub-nub, yes. | 亚当是我的小包包 没错 |
| [08:32] | I don’t care for nub-nub. | 我不关心什么小包包 |
| [08:34] | It — it sounds wrong to the ear. | 听起来不太对劲 |
| [08:36] | It’s just… Adam was the last one. | 只是 亚当是最后一个了 |
| [08:38] | Now what’s the point to Halloween? | 现在万圣节的意义是什么 |
| [08:39] | Hey. You still got me. | 你还有我啊 |
| [08:42] | Come on, hand out some candy. | 来吧 派糖果 |
| [08:44] | Dad, have you been handing out this candy the whole time? | 爸 你一直在派这种糖果吗 |
| [08:46] | Yeah, why? | 是的 怎么了 |
| [08:48] | Uh, where is my deadly candy bar? | 我的致命糖果条在哪里 |
| [08:51] | What’s happening? | 什么情况 |
| [08:52] | Where’s my deadly razor candy bar? | 我的致命剃刀糖果条在哪里 |
| [08:54] | What’s happening? | 什么情况 |
| [08:55] | I jammed a lady razor into a delicious treat | 我把女士剃刀塞进了美味糖果中 |
| [08:57] | to show Adam any crazy person could do it. | 让亚当看到任何疯子都会这样做 |
| [09:00] | Why would you do that? | 你为什么这样做 |
| [09:01] | You know what a safety nut I am! | 你知道我是个重视安全的疯子 |
| [09:03] | I did it for safety! | 我这样做是为了安全 |
| [09:04] | That is the opposite of safety! | 这样做恰恰是危险的 |
| [09:06] | I know! | 我知道 |
| [09:08] | Oh, god. I got to go find it! | 老天 我得找到才行 |
| [09:10] | I must save the children! | 我必须拯救孩子 |
| [09:12] | And save them she would. | 她要救他们 |
| [09:14] | Safety check! | 安全检查 |
| [09:16] | Give me your candy. | 把你的糖果给我 |
| [09:16] | No. | 不 |
| [09:17] | I’m not asking, I’m taking. | 我不是请求 我是拿走 |
| [09:19] | – Give it. – No! | -给我 -不 |
| [09:20] | Give it! | 给我 |
| [09:22] | Young man! | 小家伙 |
| [09:22] | Young man. | 小家伙 |
| [09:24] | I’m not a street tough, I’m a concerned mama. | 我不是街头恶霸 我是担心的妈妈 |
| [09:27] | I’m here for safety. | 我为安全而来 |
| [09:28] | Run towards safety. | 跑向安全 |
| [09:30] | Run towards safety and away from the razors. | 跑向安全 远离剃刀 |
| [09:33] | Spider-man, give me your candy! | 蜘蛛侠 糖果给我 |
| [09:34] | I’m saving lives. | 我在救命 |
| [09:36] | I’m saving lives! | 我在救命 |
| [09:39] | Halloween was in full swing | 万圣节的节日气氛正浓 |
| [09:40] | and the night would be more trick than treat. | 今晚比起甜头 更多是捣蛋 |
| [09:42] | Yo! Guess who I am. | 嗨 猜我是谁 |
| [09:47] | Bruce Lee? | 李小龙 |
| [09:48] | What? No! | 什么 不 |
| [09:49] | I’m Chuck Norris! | 我是查克·诺里斯 |
| [09:50] | Oh, yeah. | 是哦 |
| [09:51] | It’s kind of hard to read. Can I fix it? | 看不太清楚 我帮你改下好吗 |
| [09:53] | Please do. | 请便 |
| [09:56] | Perfect. | 完美 |
| [09:57] | You’re a good person. | 你是个好人 |
| [09:59] | Thanks for nothing, jerks! | 都怪你们 混蛋 |
| [10:01] | You ruined my Halloween, you ruined my relationship, | 你们毁了我的万圣节 毁了我的爱情 |
| [10:04] | and you ruined my underpants. | 还毁了我的内裤 |
| [10:06] | I haven’t actually checked yet, but I know what I’m in for! | 我还没检查 但我知道是什么情况 |
| [10:09] | Can we do this later? | 可以稍后再说吗 |
| [10:10] | Suck Norris and I have several parties to hit. | 差劲·诺里斯和我还要参加几个派对呢 |
| [10:12] | What? | 什么 |
| [10:13] | No, you can’t go. | 不 你们不能走 |
| [10:14] | I took your stupid advice, and I freaked out | 我听从了你们的建议 结果在鬼屋里 |
| [10:16] | in that haunted house like a scared little baby. | 像个胆小的小孩子一样吓坏了 |
| [10:18] | Dude, it’s not our fault you’re a nervous, jumpy, wuss-bag. | 小弟 你是个神经质的胆小鬼又不是我们的错 |
| [10:21] | Dana dropped her promise ring in that haunted house. | 戴娜把承诺戒指掉在鬼屋了 |
| [10:23] | Barry, you got to go in there and get it. | 巴瑞 你得进去找 |
| [10:24] | No way. We have six parties to hit. | 不可能 我们要参加六场派对 |
| [10:27] | Come on, just help me. | 拜托 帮帮我 |
| [10:28] | You’re always bragging | 你总是吹嘘 |
| [10:29] | that you’re literally not scared of anything on earth. | 不怕地球上的任何东西 |
| [10:32] | Or stuff in the sky, like birds or meteors. | 也不怕天上的 比如说鸟或流星 |
| [10:34] | And you’ve said many times | 你说过很多次 |
| [10:35] | that you have the strength of 10 men. | 你的力量比得上10个男人 |
| [10:36] | And 44 medium-sized children. | 或是44个中等身材的孩子 |
| [10:38] | And you have claimed you’re an unstoppable killing force. | 你还宣称你是无人能挡的杀手 |
| [10:40] | I did karate kick a jellyfish at the beach that one time. | 我的确有次在海滩用空手道招数踢飞了水母 |
| [10:44] | It stung pretty bad, but he floated away lifeless. | 刺得很痛 但它漂走时已经死了 |
| [10:47] | My god! Just go and do it already. | 我的天 快去找吧 |
| [10:49] | Oh, fine. | 好吧 |
| [10:50] | I guess this is my burden to bear | 我想这是我必须承受的负担 |
| [10:52] | since I’m the one born with extra testosterone and no fear. | 谁叫我生来男性荷尔蒙超多 而且无所畏惧 |
| [10:55] | You’ll really help me? | 你真的会帮我吗 |
| [10:56] | Dude, if anyone can find that ring, it’s this guy. | 小弟 如果有人能找到戒指 肯定是这家伙 |
| [11:00] | As I was in search of my ring, | 我去找戒指时 |
| [11:01] | my mom was hunting down her razor candy. | 我妈正在找她的剃刀糖果 |
| [11:04] | I’m home! Come quick, I need your help. | 我回来了 快来 我需要帮助 |
| [11:12] | Holy crap! | 老天爷 |
| [11:14] | Did you take all that | 这些都是你从 |
| [11:16] | from the tiny hands of little children? | 小孩子的小手中抢的吗 |
| [11:18] | And this. | 还有这个 |
| [11:20] | Bevy, the razor’s not in there. | 贝弗 剃刀不在这里面 |
| [11:23] | But it might be in here. | 可能在这里 |
| [11:26] | I threw it away! | 我扔掉了 |
| [11:28] | You power-walked out of here like a panther! | 你像豹子一样竞走冲了出去 |
| [11:30] | We couldn’t find you! | 我们找不到你 |
| [11:31] | Well, this is…concerning. | 有心了 |
| [11:35] | You — you have another bag, don’t you? | 你还有一包 对吗 |
| [11:37] | She did. | 是的 |
| [11:42] | She also had three more in the car. | 她还有三包在车上 |
| [11:45] | Heavy. I got it. | 好重 我可以的 |
| [11:48] | How far did you walk?! | 你走了多远 |
| [11:49] | Well, I didn’t know if that razor made it to the next town. | 我不知道剃刀是否到了别的镇 |
| [11:52] | I had to be sure. | 我得确定 |
| [11:54] | And all those kids she stole candy from | 那些被她抢走糖果的孩子 |
| [11:57] | were for sure gonna get their revenge… | 当然会来复仇 |
| [11:59] | With a few dozen eggs. | 用几打鸡蛋作为武器 |
| [12:00] | What are they doing? | 他们在做什么 |
| [12:01] | Egging our house! | 蛋洗咱家 |
| [12:03] | Which we deserve. | 我们活该 |
| [12:04] | This is gonna stain our aluminum siding! | 咱们的铝墙板会留下污迹的 |
| [12:06] | Again, well-deserved! | 再说一遍 我们活该 |
| [12:08] | Just give them the candy back. | 把糖果还给他们 |
| [12:12] | The only thing they’re getting is a lecture. | 他们唯一会得到的是训诫 |
| [12:15] | My mom stormed into the dark night | 我妈冲进夜色中 |
| [12:17] | to defend our home against Kermit the Frog | 对抗青蛙卡米特以及草莓娃娃 |
| [12:19] | and Strawberry Shortcake. | 保护咱们的家 |
| [12:20] | This…is a waste… of groceries! | 你们这是浪费食物 |
| [12:25] | But it became an alien standoff — | 但随之变成了外星人对峙 |
| [12:28] | Predator versus Alf. | 掠夺者大战阿福 |
| [12:32] | Look both ways when you cross the street! | 过街时要看左右 |
| [12:36] | Turns out, years of power-walking | 结果 数年的竞走 |
| [12:38] | made her a power-runner, | 令她成为跑步健将 |
| [12:39] | and Alf’s little legs were no match | 阿福的小短腿根本不是我那 |
| [12:41] | for my angry smother. | 生气老妈的对手 |
| [12:45] | Hey, Bar, we don’t say this stuff much, | 巴瑞 这话并不经常说 |
| [12:47] | but you’re a good brother for going in there for me. | 但你为我进去 你是个好哥哥 |
| [12:50] | Yeah, yeah. | 是的 是的 |
| [12:51] | Thanks, I’m just gonna — yeah, yeah. | 谢谢 我只要… 是的是的 |
| [12:54] | – Are you okay, man? – Of course I’m okay. | -你还好吗 伙计 -当然还好 |
| [12:55] | Why wouldn’t I be okay? I’m an adult. | 我为什么不好 我是成年人 |
| [12:57] | Aah! What was that? | 怎么回事 |
| [12:59] | Are you okay, man?! | 你还好吗 伙计 |
| [13:00] | Yeah! I just had the bravery shakes, god. | 我只是勇敢地哆嗦了一下 |
| [13:02] | What’s happening with you right now? | 你现在是怎么了 |
| [13:04] | Look, I know for some reason | 我知道出于某种原因 |
| [13:06] | you think I have extra testosterone and no fear. | 你觉得我男性荷尔蒙超多 而且无所畏惧 |
| [13:09] | Yeah, ’cause you’ve said those exact words | 对 因为这是你的原话 |
| [13:11] | for the last 10 years. | 你已经说了十年了 |
| [13:12] | Right, but the truth is, | 对 但事实是 |
| [13:15] | I actually have a normal amount of testosterone | 我其实有着正常数量的男性荷尔蒙 |
| [13:17] | and a tremendous amount of fear. | 以及非常多的恐惧 |
| [13:19] | Then why would you say it? | 那你为什么要这样说 |
| [13:21] | I say it ’cause people finding out about my fear | 我这样说是因为我最大的恐惧就是 |
| [13:24] | is my greatest fear. | 别人发现我的恐惧 |
| [13:25] | Fine! Erica, you go in. | 好吧 爱丽卡 你进去 |
| [13:28] | Pass. | 才不 |
| [13:29] | Seriously? You’re scared of haunted houses, too? | 不是吧 你也害怕鬼屋吗 |
| [13:31] | Hell, no. | 当然不 |
| [13:32] | But there’s a frat guy I made out with in there, | 但里面有个我曾经亲过的兄弟会男生 |
| [13:34] | and if I see him, I know I’ll fall right back into it. | 如果我看到他 我知道我又会看上他 |
| [13:38] | And that’s my greatest fear… | 而这是我最大的恐惧 |
| [13:40] | Or at least something I would like to avoid. | 或者至少这是我想避开的 |
| [13:42] | Come on! Safety in numbers! | 拜托 人多就安全 |
| [13:43] | We just have to stick together. | 我们只须在一起 |
| [13:45] | Okay, let’s do this. | 好的 我们进去 |
| [13:46] | But, wait! | 等等 |
| [13:48] | How’s my hair? | 我的头发怎么样 |
| [13:51] | Good. | 很好 |
| [13:52] | Yeah. | 很好 |
| [13:54] | And with that, the three of us faced our fears. | 就这样 我们三个面对了我们的恐惧 |
| [13:56] | The plan was simple — stick together at all costs. | 计划很简单 无论如何待在一起 |
| [14:12] | Yo, pretty, pretty. | 美女你好 |
| [14:14] | Hey, Anton! | 安东 |
| [14:15] | Go, just go. Leave me. | 走 快走 别烦我 |
| [14:17] | But what about sticking together? | 不是说好在一起吗 |
| [14:18] | So, Anton, did you like, um, | 安东 你是不是 |
| [14:20] | lose my number or something? | 弄丢了我的电话号码 |
| [14:26] | The ring’s got to be around here somewhere. | 戒指肯定就在这附近 |
| [14:31] | My ankle! | 我的脚踝 |
| [14:32] | Adam, help me! | 亚当 救我 |
| [14:34] | I can’t hear you through the fog! | 我在雾中听不到你在说什么 |
| [14:35] | That’s not how fog works! | 雾又不会影响听力 |
| [14:37] | Goodbye, Barry! | 再见 巴瑞 |
| [14:38] | You were a terrible brother, but I love you! | 你是一个糟糕的哥哥 但我爱你 |
| [14:42] | That night, I wasn’t the only one | 那一晚 我并不是唯一一个 |
| [14:43] | facing an angry monster. | 面对发怒的怪物的人 |
| [14:45] | Shame on you kids. | 你们这些孩子真应该感到羞愧 |
| [14:47] | Running around like hooligans in the night, egging my house. | 在晚上像小流氓一样乱跑 蛋洗我家 |
| [14:52] | Your mothers have failed as mothers, | 你们的妈妈太失败了 |
| [14:54] | and they are gonna be livid when I call them. | 我打电话过去 她们会非常生气的 |
| [14:58] | Hello. | 你们好 |
| [14:59] | May I give you another take on this situation? | 交给我处理行吗 |
| [15:01] | Not now. I’m on a roll. | 不是时候 我正训得起劲 |
| [15:02] | Has it occurred to you that these children’s parents | 你有没想过 鉴于事实 这些孩子的家长 |
| [15:05] | might think differently, given all the facts? | 可能想法会和你的不同 |
| [15:08] | It has not occurred to me | 我没想过 |
| [15:09] | and will continue to not occur to me. | 我也继续不会这样想 |
| [15:11] | Well, it occurs to me | 我觉得 |
| [15:12] | you’ve become everything you fear on Halloween. | 万圣节你所惧怕的事 你全做了 |
| [15:14] | Please. I have not. | 拜托 我才没有 |
| [15:15] | You hid a razor in a chocolate bar. | 你在巧克力条里藏了一把剃刀 |
| [15:17] | To prove a point. | 是为了证明我的观点 |
| [15:18] | You stole candy from children like a street tough. | 你像街头恶霸一样从孩子手里抢糖果 |
| [15:21] | To protect them. | 是为了保护他们 |
| [15:23] | And then there’s the kidnappings. | 然后还有绑架 |
| [15:26] | All I did was round them up | 我只是追赶他们 |
| [15:28] | and force them into my house and — | 强迫他们来我的家 |
| [15:29] | Oh, my god, that is bad. | 我的天 太糟糕了 |
| [15:32] | Hiya, guys. | 你们好 |
| [15:33] | On your way out, you’ll each find a bag of candy | 你们出去的时候 每人会找到一包 |
| [15:36] | that I put a $5 bill in, | 我放了五块钱的糖果包 |
| [15:38] | so maybe you shouldn’t mention this to your parents. | 这事就别跟你们爸妈提起了 |
| [15:41] | And by the way, have a Happy Halloween. | 顺便说下 万圣节快乐 |
| [15:43] | Your wife’s nuts, dude. | 你老婆是个疯子 伙计 |
| [15:45] | Oh, yeah. | 是的 |
| [15:50] | Kermit’s right. | 青蛙卡米特说得对 |
| [15:51] | I really did lose it tonight. | 我今晚真是疯了 |
| [15:53] | It’s just Halloween. Who cares? | 只是万圣节而已 谁在乎啊 |
| [15:55] | Don’t you understand what this night means to me? | 你不明白这晚对我来说有什么意义吗 |
| [16:00] | No matter how old Adam got, | 无论亚当多大 |
| [16:01] | he was always so happy when we would go out and get candy. | 我们出去要糖果时他总是那么高兴 |
| [16:05] | His smile, the excitement, | 他的笑 那个兴奋劲儿 |
| [16:08] | his sweaty little hand reaching up to grab mine, | 他流汗的小手抓住我的手 |
| [16:11] | and now his sweaty little hand is grabbing someone else’s. | 现在他流汗的小手抓着别人的手 |
| [16:16] | He’ll never need me again. | 他不再需要我了 |
| [16:21] | You got anything savory? | 有没有薄荷味的 |
| [16:24] | Please leave. | 请离开 |
| [16:28] | That night, my mom realized | 那晚 我妈意识到 |
| [16:30] | it was time to let go of her kids on Halloween, | 是时候在万圣节时对孩子们放手了 |
| [16:32] | and my dad realized he could help her through it. | 我爸意识到他可以帮她度过难关 |
| [16:36] | Look at me. | 看我 |
| [16:37] | I’m an alien man just like you. Na-nu, na-nu. | 我是和你一样的外星人 布拉布拉 |
| [16:41] | What are you doing? What is this? | 你做什么 这是什么 |
| [16:42] | I thought, “well, if you’re in a couples costume, | 我想 如果要穿配对装扮服 |
| [16:44] | you might as well be with someone | 还是和实际上 |
| [16:46] | you’re in an actual couple with.” | 是一对的人穿得好 |
| [16:49] | You put together this stupid thing for me? | 你为我穿的这身傻傻的装扮服吗 |
| [16:51] | Yeah, you know, I’m not one for sentimental crap. | 你知道 我这人不太会说安慰的话 |
| [16:54] | God! Son of a bitch! | 老天 该死的 |
| [16:56] | Just take it off. | 取下来 |
| [16:57] | I can’t! | 取不下来 |
| [16:58] | This is a child’s helmet. | 这是孩子的头盔 |
| [16:59] | It’s like sucking on my head. | 好像在吸我的头 |
| [17:00] | My head’s in a vacuum. | 我的头在吸尘器里 |
| [17:02] | Why would you just jam it on? | 使劲拉 |
| [17:03] | The more you pull it off, the more it clamps! | 越拉越夹得紧 |
| [17:05] | Why would you do this?! | 你为什么这样做 |
| [17:07] | I just thought, you know, | 我只是想 |
| [17:08] | you can’t have halloween with the kids anymore, | 你不能再和孩子们一起过万圣节了 |
| [17:11] | and maybe you could have Halloween with me. | 也许你可以和我一起过 |
| [17:14] | That is so sweet. | 你真好 |
| [17:16] | And I would love that. | 我非常愿意 |
| [17:17] | Mama, I need you! | 妈妈 我需要你 |
| [17:18] | Move! | 走开 |
| [17:19] | Boopie, what’s wrong?! | 宝贝 出什么事了 |
| [17:21] | It’s Barry! | 巴瑞出事了 |
| [17:21] | He twisted his ankle in the haunted house. | 他在鬼屋扭了脚踝 |
| [17:23] | Oh, no. Where’s Erica? | 不 爱丽卡在哪里 |
| [17:24] | She’s in there, too, with a frat boy named Anton. | 她也在那里 和叫安东的兄弟会男生一起 |
| [17:26] | Oh, hell, no! | 当然不行 |
| [17:31] | All right, so we’ll put a pin in the couples costume. | 配对装扮服的事以后再说 |
| [17:33] | Maybe after Adam goes to college. | 也许在亚当上大学之后 |
| [17:49] | Turns out, that night, | 结果那晚 |
| [17:50] | the scariest thing in that haunted house was my mom. | 鬼屋里最可怕的是我的妈妈 |
| [17:53] | What the…? | 搞什么 |
| [17:54] | Move it! | 走开 |
| [17:56] | Out of my way! | 别挡道 |
| [17:57] | Back off, punk! | 一边去 小阿飞 |
| [18:00] | Mom kick! | 妈妈踢 |
| [18:04] | Mom slap! | 妈妈扇 |
| [18:05] | You! Out! | 你 出去 |
| [18:06] | Damn it! Call me? | 见鬼 打我电话 |
| [18:09] | Do not call her! | 不准打电话给她 |
| [18:13] | Dana’s ring wasn’t the only thing I found that night. | 戴娜的戒指不是那晚我唯一发现的东西 |
| [18:15] | I also discovered | 我还发现 |
| [18:17] | that my mom and I made quite the team. | 我妈妈和我是不错的团队 |
| [18:19] | I found the ring. | 我找到戒指了 |
| [18:20] | Then go. | 快走 |
| [18:21] | I’ll stay and find your brother. | 我留在这里找你哥 |
| [18:23] | Thanks, mama. | 谢谢你 妈妈 |
| [18:25] | You got it, my little alien. | 不客气 我的小异形 |
| [18:29] | And even though that was our last couples costue, | 尽管那是我们最后一次穿配对装扮服 |
| [18:31] | it turned out to be the best one ever. | 却是最好的 |
| [18:35] | As much as my mom savored | 我妈对我小时候的 |
| [18:37] | every single Halloween when I was little, | 每一个万圣节都意犹未尽 |
| [18:39] | this was the one she’d remember forever. | 这一个她更是终生难忘 |
| [18:41] | Aah! My ankle. | 我的脚踝 |
| [18:44] | It’s all right, love bug. | 没事 小宝贝 |
| [18:46] | You’re safe now. | 你现在安全了 |
| [18:47] | You hear that, Bar? Mom saved us. | 你听到了吗 巴瑞 妈妈救了我们 |
| [18:49] | We are the luckiest kids in the world. | 我们是全世界最幸运的孩子 |
| [18:51] | You’re grounded for a month. | 禁足你一个月 |
| [18:52] | For sure. | 当然 |
| [19:04] | That’s the thing about love. | 爱情就是这样 |
| [19:05] | When you face your fears, | 当你面对恐惧时 |
| [19:07] | you can finally take off your mask | 最终你可以摘下面具 |
| [19:09] | and show people who you really are. | 让别人看到你本来的样子 |
| [19:17] | Sorry for using you as a human shield and all. | 抱歉用你当人肉盾牌什么的 |
| [19:20] | Well, you went back in. | 你又回去了 |
| [19:23] | It was so scary in there. | 里面好吓人 |
| [19:25] | It was, but losing you was even scarier. | 是的 但失去你更吓人 |
| [19:28] | You know, Halloween isn’t over. | 万圣节还没有结束 |
| [19:30] | It — it’s not too late to get some candy. | 去要糖果还不算迟 |
| [19:33] | Candy sounds great. | 要糖果听起来不错 |
| [19:35] | So my first adult Halloween ended the way it always did — | 我的第一个成年人万圣节的结局和以前一样 |
| [19:38] | With me and Dana getting candy. | 我和戴娜去要糖果 |
| [19:40] | And it couldn’t have been more perfect. | 不可能更完美了 |
| [19:42] | You gonna go keep him safe? | 你要去确保他的安全吗 |
| [19:45] | Actually, I think he’ll be all right without me. | 我想他没我也不会有事的 |
| [19:51] | But watching from a distance can’t hurt. | 但从远处看着他不会有什么坏处的 |
| [19:57] | Growing up, there’s a lot to be afraid of, | 成长过程中 有许多害怕的事 |
| [19:59] | but when you know in your heart your family has your back, | 但当你明白有家人支持你时 |
| [20:02] | nothing in life is scary. | 生活中没有什么是可怕的 |
| [20:13] | Yo, man, this place is really crazy. | 老天 这地方好吓人 |
| [20:16] | I know. God, it looks scary in the dark. | 我知道 老天 黑暗里好可怕 |
| [20:19] | Oh, this is so creepy. | 令人毛骨悚然 |
| [20:21] | Look at the cobwebs. | 看这些蜘蛛网 |
| [20:24] | What’s that? | 那是什么 |
| [20:25] | What was that?! | 那是什么 |
| [20:31] | Who wants waffles? | 谁要华夫饼 |
| [20:34] | Kids, come on down! | 孩子们 快下来 |
| [20:36] | Here you go, Murray. | 给你 默里 |
| [20:38] | Oops. I almost forgot — | 哎呀 我差点忘了 |
| [20:40] | I need to get the kids’ lunch money. | 我得给孩子们午餐钱 |
| [20:42] | Mom’s got to stop wearing her old Halloween costume. | 妈不能再穿她的旧万圣节装扮服了 |
| [20:45] | She won’t. | 她不会脱的 |
| [20:46] | Whoever’s standing there, let go of my purse. | 无论是谁站在这里 放开我的包 |
| [20:48] | Her new perm didn’t settle right. | 她新烫的头发没烫好 |
| [20:50] | She doesn’t want anyone to see what’s going on under there. | 她不想任何人看到面具里面的样子 |
| [20:52] | Still getting the hang of this thing. | 还在熟悉这身打扮 |
| [20:55] | Yeah, we should go. | 我们该走了 |
| [20:57] | Help your mother. | 帮助你们的妈妈 |
| [20:59] | You have 30 seconds to comply. | 给你们30秒照我说的做 |