| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | In the ’80s, gym class was not the politically correct, | 八十年代 体育课不是我们现在所知的 |
| [00:05] | supportive environment we know today. | 政治立场正确的支持性环境 |
| [00:06] | To say the least, was humiliating. | 退一步说 就是丢脸 |
| [00:09] | Using these state-sanctioned calipers, | 用这些国家批准的卡尺 |
| [00:11] | I will rank you by weight and girth. | 我会把你们按体重和周长排列 |
| [00:13] | Let’s grab that flab. | 看谁一身肥肉 |
| [00:14] | And it wasn’t just our awkward bodies being judged. | 接受鉴定的不仅是我们发育期的身体 |
| [00:16] | It was also our athletic skill — | 还有我们的运动技能 |
| [00:18] | or lack thereof. | 或是缺乏运动神经 |
| [00:19] | Didn’t make it to the wall in time. | 没有及时到达墙壁 |
| [00:22] | Assume the position. | 摆好姿势 |
| [00:23] | They don’t call it “Butts Up” for nothing. | “翘屁股球”的名字可不是白叫的 |
| [00:27] | How is this a sport? | 这怎么会是体育运动呢 |
| [00:29] | But the greatest indignity of all — | 但最伤尊严的 |
| [00:30] | the sadistic ritual of picking teams. | 是挑选队友的残忍惯例 |
| [00:33] | Sposato. | 斯波萨多 |
| [00:34] | In a public shaming, | 在众目睽睽的羞辱下 |
| [00:35] | the strong were separated from the weak. | 强者与弱者区分开来 |
| [00:37] | My friends and I were always chosen last | 我和朋友们总是最后被挑选的 |
| [00:38] | for obvious reasons. | 原因很明显 |
| [00:40] | I’ll take Sirota. | 我要西若塔 |
| [00:41] | Sweet! | 太棒了 |
| [00:42] | The kid picked third-to-last | 倒数第三个被选的 |
| [00:43] | was known as the “I don’t know.” | 是众所周知的”我不知道” |
| [00:45] | I don’t know. Dave Kim. | 我不知道 金戴夫 |
| [00:47] | Yes! I’m not the worst! | 太棒了 我不是最差的 |
| [00:48] | Second-to-last was the “I guess.” | 倒数第二个是”我想” |
| [00:51] | Goldberg, I guess. | 金伯格 我想 |
| [00:52] | A fine choice. | 明智的选择 |
| [00:53] | The only thing worse than being picked last were the games, | 唯一比最后被选更差劲的就是游戏本身 |
| [00:55] | where the athletic ruled | 体育尖子生主宰一切 |
| [00:56] | and the scrubs desperately wished to go under the radar. | 菜鸟们绝望地只希望没人发现 |
| [00:59] | Don’t pass to me! Don’t pass to me! | 别传给我 别传给我 |
| [01:00] | Don’t pass to me! | 别传给我 |
| [01:04] | What? | 怎么办 |
| [01:06] | Goldberg, you’re the worst. | 金伯格 你是最差劲的 |
| [01:08] | I welcome the feedback. | 欢迎反馈 |
| [01:09] | But luckily, for kids like me, | 好在 对我们这样的孩子来说 |
| [01:11] | there was another world where we were champions — | 有另一个我们是冠军的世界 |
| [01:14] | Dungeons & Dragons. | 龙与地下城 |
| [01:16] | Long before Xbox, | 在Xbox出现之前 |
| [01:17] | there was a role-playing game with 20-sided dice | 有一种使用20面骰子的角色扮演游戏 |
| [01:20] | and a Dungeon Master who led you on adventures using books | 地下城主用充满怪兽和宝藏的书 |
| [01:23] | filled with monsters and treasure. | 带领你去冒险 |
| [01:25] | The firenewt is coming for you, Gribald the Unreasonable. | 火蝾螈人过来了 无理格瑞伯德 |
| [01:28] | I use my potion of fire resistance. | 我用防火药水 |
| [01:30] | – It works. – Yes! | -管用 -太棒了 |
| [01:31] | Oh, no. Not this game. | 不行 不能玩这个游戏 |
| [01:34] | I heard all about it on “60 Minutes.” | 我在《60分钟》上看到了 |
| [01:36] | A stuffy Southern reverend said it’s the gateway to black magic. | 一个古板的南方教士说这是通往巫术的大门 |
| [01:39] | Don’t worry, guys. I got this. | 别担心 各位 我有办法 |
| [01:42] | Okay, mama, | 好的 妈妈 |
| [01:43] | I won’t play the thing that makes my heart happy. | 我不会玩这个令我的心快乐的游戏 |
| [01:45] | You bewitched me, you little devil. | 你对我施了魔法 你这个小恶魔 |
| [01:49] | Look away. I’m doing this for us. | 别看 我这是为了大家 |
| [01:51] | Dungeons & Snuggles! | 抱抱和地下城 |
| [01:54] | I’m a little devil, and I like kisses. | 我是小恶魔 我喜欢亲亲 |
| [02:10] | It was April 6, 1980-something, | 那是一九八几年的4月6日 |
| [02:11] | and my sister’s plan for her future | 我姐在计划她的未来 |
| [02:13] | was about to rock our mother to her very core. | 马上要彻底颠覆我妈的世界 |
| [02:16] | Mom, insanely great news. | 妈 疯狂好消息 |
| [02:18] | I’m gonna do what you want and stay in state for college. | 我会照你的心愿 在州里读大学 |
| [02:21] | In state? That’s where I live. | 州里 是我住的地方 |
| [02:24] | Yes. Good. | 太棒了 |
| [02:26] | CMU it is. | 卡内基梅隆大学 |
| [02:27] | Where in Philadelphia is CMU? | 卡内基梅隆大学在费城哪里 |
| [02:29] | Um, Carnegie Mellon’s only like a little bit west. | 卡内基梅隆大学稍微偏西一点 |
| [02:33] | How far west? | 向西多远 |
| [02:34] | Pittsburgh. | 匹兹堡 |
| [02:35] | Pittsburgh?! No. Too far. | 匹兹堡 不行 太远了 |
| [02:38] | You’re the worst daughter in the world. | 你是全世界最差劲的女儿 |
| [02:39] | Come on, Mom. | 拜托 妈 |
| [02:40] | It’s a great school with an amazing music program. | 这是所好学校 有非常棒的音乐课程 |
| [02:42] | No, you’re gonna go to JFA right here in town. | 不 你要读镇上的JFA |
| [02:45] | We discussed this. | 我们讨论过了 |
| [02:46] | I am not going to the Jenkintown Funk Academy. | 我不会去读珍金镇乡村爵士学院 |
| [02:48] | Oh, so now you’re too good for the Funk. | 现在乡村爵士学院配不上你了吗 |
| [02:51] | Yes, the Funk is in a mini-mall | 对 这间学校在小商场 |
| [02:53] | between a dry cleaner and a balloon shop. | 左右分别是干洗店和气球店 |
| [02:55] | Come on, Mom. | 拜托 妈 |
| [02:57] | Even Mr. Glascott said CMU is perfect for me. | 就连格拉斯科特老师也说这间学校太适合我了 |
| [03:00] | At least hear him out. | 至少听他说说吧 |
| [03:01] | And then undermine and overpower him. | 然后打击控制他 |
| [03:03] | Okay. Sure thing. Set that meeting. | 好 没问题 安排见面 |
| [03:07] | Dad, you need to come with us. | 爸 你要一起去 |
| [03:08] | Mom is in full sabotage mode. | 妈现在是全面破坏模式 |
| [03:10] | This is my dream. | 这是我的梦想 |
| [03:11] | And it’s my dream to have one less moron living in this house. | 我的梦想是少个白痴住在家里 |
| [03:14] | I’ll help you. | 我会帮你 |
| [03:15] | I’ll go, too. | 我也去 |
| [03:17] | College is a nonstop party. | 大学就是不间断的派对 |
| [03:19] | You never even went to college, Al. | 你从来没上过大学 老艾 |
| [03:21] | Yes, but I just watched “Back to School” | 对 但我刚看了《回到学堂》 |
| [03:23] | with Rodney Dangerfield. | 罗德尼·丹泽菲尔德主演的 |
| [03:25] | It’s about this delightful old scamp | 讲的是一个讨人喜欢的老家伙 |
| [03:27] | who goes back to school, and it’s hilarious, | 回去学校读书了 太搞笑了 |
| [03:29] | ’cause let’s face it — | 因为我们承认现实吧 |
| [03:30] | a guy that old doesn’t go back to school. | 那么老的家伙不会回去读书的 |
| [03:32] | But he does. | 但他去了 |
| [03:34] | He goes back to school but good. | 他回到了学校 而且棒极了 |
| [03:37] | Are you done? | 你讲完了吗 |
| [03:38] | I don’t have to be. | 不讲了也行啊 |
| [03:38] | While Erica and my dad were struggling to get my mom on board, | 爱丽卡和我爸努力想取得妈妈的一致意见时 |
| [03:42] | my friends were fighting their way through enemy territory. | 我的朋友们正拼命杀出敌方领域 |
| [03:45] | As you climb out of the pit, | 你爬出陷阱时 |
| [03:46] | a band of marauding orcs awaits you. | 一队捕食的半兽人正等着你 |
| [03:48] | Mondragor, your move. | 蒙德拉哥 到你了 |
| [03:50] | Earth to Mondragor. | 呼叫蒙德拉哥 |
| [03:52] | Sorry, guys. I can’t stop thinking about gym class. | 抱歉各位 我总是在想体育课的事 |
| [03:54] | We’ve been picked last for years. | 几年来我们一直是最后被选的 |
| [03:56] | – It’s bull crap. – Relax, dude. | -真是烦人 -放轻松 伙计 |
| [03:58] | The athletes rule now, but once we hit high school, | 现在是体育尖子生的天下 但只要上了高中 |
| [04:00] | our brains and elegance will be valued. | 我们的头脑和高雅就值钱了 |
| [04:02] | Really? | 真的吗 |
| [04:02] | For sure. | 当然 |
| [04:04] | Until then, back to the orc attack. | 在那之前 回到半兽人攻击上 |
| [04:06] | More like dork attack! Nice. | 呆子攻击还差不多 漂亮 |
| [04:08] | Oh, God. | 老天 |
| [04:09] | Face the facts, Un-Kool & the Gang, | 承认现实吧 酷不了小子们 |
| [04:11] | you guys are doomed. | 你们根本没戏 |
| [04:12] | When did you even sit down? | 你什么时候坐下的 |
| [04:13] | My point is, you guys got to figure out a way | 我想说的是 你们得想到办法 |
| [04:15] | to not get picked last before you’re in high school. | 在上高中前做到不最后被人选 |
| [04:18] | Otherwise, you’ll never date, | 否则 你们永远没约会 |
| [04:19] | you’ll never love, you’ll never have joy. | 永远没人爱 永远不会开心 |
| [04:21] | Later. | 回见 |
| [04:23] | What if your mean-spirited brother’s right? | 万一你卑鄙的哥哥说的是对的怎么办 |
| [04:25] | I can’t be bottom of the social chain in high school. | 我不能成为高中社交链的最底端 |
| [04:27] | And just because I’m the coolest one in our group | 在我们的小团伙里 我是最酷的一个 |
| [04:29] | doesn’t mean anything in the outside world. | 对外界来说这根本没意义 |
| [04:31] | Okay, that settles it. | 好的 就这么定了 |
| [04:33] | We’re gonna break the cycle of dorkdom. | 我们要打破呆子的怪圈 |
| [04:35] | – But how? – I’ll tell ya how! | -怎么做 -我来告诉你 |
| [04:37] | Tomorrow, I shall storm Mellor’s office | 明天 我会冲进梅勒的办公室 |
| [04:39] | and demand an end to our oppression! | 要求终结我们的痛苦 |
| [04:41] | – Huzzah! – Huzzah! | -好哇 -好哇 |
| [04:42] | Huzzah! | 好哇 |
| [04:43] | No! | 不 |
| [04:44] | Come on. Please. | 拜托 求你了 |
| [04:45] | Picking teams has been the same | 从有体育课开始 |
| [04:46] | since the dawn of physical education. | 就是这样选队友的 |
| [04:48] | The awesome jocks choose kids in descending order | 优秀的运动员按运动能力强弱 |
| [04:51] | of athletic ability. | 依次挑选队友 |
| [04:52] | What is the problem? | 有什么问题 |
| [04:53] | The problem is the rest of us suffer. | 问题是我们其他人很痛苦 |
| [04:55] | Turns out, gym class will determine | 原来 体育课会决定 |
| [04:57] | how society views us for the rest of our lives. | 我们这辈子社会对我们的看法 |
| [05:00] | People… really think that? | 人们 真的这样想吗 |
| [05:02] | Of course. | 当然 |
| [05:03] | Don’t you realize | 你没意识到 |
| [05:04] | gym is the most important class there is? | 体育课是最重要的课吗 |
| [05:06] | Well, I know that. | 我知道啊 |
| [05:08] | It’s just, when the English department | 只是英语系 |
| [05:10] | doesn’t invite you out for bowling night, | 在保龄球夜没邀请你时 |
| [05:12] | it really gets in your head. | 挺伤人的 |
| [05:14] | You hold the power, Coach. | 权力在你手中 教练 |
| [05:15] | Whatever you choose here today | 你今天的选择 |
| [05:17] | could change the course of our whole lives. | 可以改变我们一生的轨迹 |
| [05:21] | Let’s do it. | 就这么办 |
| [05:22] | Tomorrow, you’ll be the team captain, | 明天你可以做队长 |
| [05:24] | and you can choose all your nerd friends first. | 你可以先选择你所有的呆子朋友 |
| [05:26] | Sounds great, | 听起来真不错 |
| [05:27] | except for the part where you called us nerds. | 除了你管我们叫呆子 |
| [05:29] | Losers it is, then! | 那就叫失败者好了 |
| [05:30] | Tomorrow, the hierarchy of the physical-education world | 明天 体育教育世界的等级制 |
| [05:33] | will be turned upside down, | 会彻底颠覆 |
| [05:35] | and all you dregs, dipwads, and dweebs, rejoice! | 你们所有的糟粕笨蛋和呆瓜 庆祝吧 |
| [05:39] | I had won over Coach Mellor, | 我说服了梅勒教练 |
| [05:40] | but my mom was hoping to sway Mr. Glascott to her team. | 我妈则希望劝服格拉斯科特老师站到她这边 |
| [05:43] | Have to admit, I love it when an entire family comes together | 我得说 我很乐意看到全家人一起 |
| [05:46] | to discuss a young lady’s journey to college. | 来讨论年轻姑娘的大学之旅 |
| [05:49] | So any first thoughts? | 那么有什么想法 |
| [05:51] | Yes, uh that | 有的 |
| [05:53] | Okay, hot out of the gate. | 好的 开始就很激烈啊 |
| [05:55] | So you came to voice some concerns. | 你是来表达担心的 |
| [05:57] | I hope you’re here to keep this conversation civil. | 我希望你是来令这次谈话内容保持文明的 |
| [05:59] | I’ll do what I can. | 我会尽力 |
| [06:00] | Gotcha. | 明白 |
| [06:01] | Uh, I’m still not sure | 我依然不确定 |
| [06:02] | what the gentleman in the corner is doing here. | 角上这位先生是来做什么的 |
| [06:04] | I’m considering going back to school myself. | 我在考虑去上学 |
| [06:07] | Ignore him. He saw a movie. | 无视他 他看了部电影 |
| [06:09] | Can we talk about CMU now? | 现在可以说卡内基梅隆大学了吗 |
| [06:10] | Look, I know it’s scary sending your baby out into the world, | 我知道送自己的宝贝去外面的世界很可怕 |
| [06:13] | but this college can turn your little girl into a leader. | 但这间大学可以让你们的宝贝女儿成为领导者 |
| [06:17] | And in that moment, my mom saw more than just a brochure. | 在那一刻 我妈看到的不仅是宣传手册 |
| [06:20] | She saw the chance to make all of Erica’s dreams come true… | 她看到令爱丽卡梦想成真的机会 |
| [06:24] | It, uh…does look a bit nicer than the Funk Academy. | 这个 看起来是比乡村爵士学院好一点 |
| [06:28] | …while my dad saw the reality of a world without his princess. | 我爸却看到了没有他的小公主的现实世界 |
| [06:31] | Who are these guys? | 这些家伙是什么人 |
| [06:33] | Who are these guys? | 这些家伙是什么人 |
| [06:34] | Who are those guys? | 这些家伙是什么人 |
| [06:35] | And Pops just felt ripped off. | 老爷子则觉得被骗了 |
| [06:37] | I don’t see any hot tubs in the dorms. | 我没看到宿舍里有按摩浴缸 |
| [06:39] | Are there hot tubs in the dorms? | 宿舍里有按摩浴缸吗 |
| [06:41] | Look! You can study abroad. I could go to Paris! | 看 可以出国学习 我可以去巴黎 |
| [06:44] | I’ve always wanted to go to Paris. | 我一直想去巴黎 |
| [06:45] | Wait a minute. Now she’s going to a whole other country? | 慢着 现在她要去别的国家吗 |
| [06:48] | Erica, I…didn’t realize how wrong I’d been. | 爱丽卡 我之前没意识到自己有多错 |
| [06:53] | I want this for you, sweetie — all of it. | 我希望你能拥有这些 宝贝 全部的 |
| [06:55] | Oh, my God. Thank you so much. | 我的天 太感谢你了 |
| [06:57] | Let’s go sign up for a tour. | 我们报名参观学校 |
| [06:59] | Well, looks like my work here is over. | 看来我的工作结束了 |
| [07:02] | It is over, ’cause there’s no way | 是结束了 因为不可能 |
| [07:04] | I’m letting my pumpkin go to this hellhole. | 我让我的小南瓜去这个鬼地方 |
| [07:06] | But look at the girl in the pamphlet. | 但看宣传册上的姑娘 |
| [07:08] | She’s smiling under a tree with the boy in the wheelchair. | 她在树下微笑 旁边还有坐轮椅的男生 |
| [07:11] | Aww, look at him. He’s holding a book. | 看他 他拿着书 |
| [07:13] | Okay, compromise. | 好的 我妥协下 |
| [07:14] | The moron boys can get the hell out, | 两个白痴儿子可以滚蛋 |
| [07:17] | but my little peanut, she’s going to school in Philadelphia. | 但我的小花生 要读费城的学校 |
| [07:20] | I get it. | 我懂 |
| [07:21] | I got a bird. She’s my princess. | 我养了只鸟 也是我的公主 |
| [07:23] | If she flew away, I don’t know what I would do. | 如果她飞走了 我不知道我会怎么做 |
| [07:26] | Wait. Where are you going? | 等等 你去哪里 |
| [07:29] | What’s with the getup? | 你怎么这样打扮 |
| [07:30] | Is there, like, a sports musical you’re starring in? | 你在主演什么体育音乐剧吗 |
| [07:32] | Little production called gym class, | 一部叫做《体育课》的作品 |
| [07:34] | and Coach Mellor’s letting me be the leading man. | 梅勒教练让我做男主角 |
| [07:36] | He made you captain? | 他让你做队长吗 |
| [07:38] | This is a game changer. | 这改变了一切 |
| [07:39] | You got to pick smart. | 你得谨慎地选 |
| [07:40] | For sure. | 当然 |
| [07:41] | First my boy Sirota, then Dave Kim, Tiny Tyler, | 先是我哥们西若塔 然后是金戴夫 小泰勒 |
| [07:43] | Lanky Hank, and the foreign-exchange kid | 瘦汉克 外国交换生 |
| [07:45] | who knows nothing of our customs. | 他对我们的习俗一窍不通 |
| [07:47] | No! | 不 |
| [07:48] | This is the only time you’ll ever be captain. | 这是你唯一做队长的机会 |
| [07:50] | You can’t pick the wienies. | 你不能选没用的人 |
| [07:52] | You got to pick the winners, earn their respect. | 你得选胜者 赢得他们的尊重 |
| [07:55] | This is a defining moment for you, bro. | 这是你的决定性时刻 兄弟 |
| [07:58] | Barry made a convincing argument, | 巴瑞的话很有说服力 |
| [07:59] | but there was no way I’d pick the athletes | 但不可能我选体育尖子生 |
| [08:01] | over my best friends… | 而不选我最好的朋友 |
| [08:02] | I’ll take Corbett, Big Luke Schmidt, | 我选科比特 大个卢克·施密特 |
| [08:04] | Spink, and Taz Money. | 斯平克 还有塔兹哥 |
| [08:05] | …but I found a way. | 但我找到了办法 |
| [08:07] | Dude, what the hell did you just do to us? | 哥们 你怎么这样对待我们 |
| [08:09] | Don’t worry. | 别担心 |
| [08:10] | Good news is, I’m climbing the social ladder | 好消息 我踩在你们身上 |
| [08:13] | by stepping on you guys. | 爬上了社交阶梯的高处 |
| [08:14] | It’ll take a while, and I’ll have to be | 需要一段时间 我必须 |
| [08:16] | mean to you at first — super-mean — | 在一开始对你们很刻薄 超级刻薄 |
| [08:18] | but one day, we’ll all be cool. | 但有一天 我们都会很酷的 |
| [08:20] | Me first, though. | 不过我是第一个 |
| [08:21] | I don’t like your plan at all. | 我完全不喜欢你的计划 |
| [08:22] | Oh, please, Dave Kim, you’d do the exact same thing. | 得了 金戴夫 换你也会这样做 |
| [08:25] | No way. | 不可能 |
| [08:26] | My allegiance would always be | 我会永远 |
| [08:27] | to my friends and Sergei the exchange student. | 对我的朋友和交换生塞奇忠诚 |
| [08:30] | This betrayal will not stand. | 我们不会容忍你的背叛 |
| [08:32] | Much like “Revenge of the Nerds,” | 就像《菜鸟大反攻》一样 |
| [08:33] | we will dig deep and use our brains to defeat you | 我们会想办法 用头脑来击败你们 |
| [08:36] | once and for all. | 彻底击败 |
| [08:38] | But there would be no revenge. | 但是没有大反攻 |
| [08:54] | Nice assist, Goldie. | 助攻真漂亮 小金 |
| [08:57] | All you, Taz Money. | 全是你的功劳 塔兹哥 |
| [08:58] | Yes. Well done, Adam the Betrayer. | 做得好 背叛者亚当 |
| [09:01] | Come on, Dave Kim. I’ll make it up to you. | 得了 金戴夫 我会补偿你的 |
| [09:03] | – Switch teams. – That’s a no. | -换队 -不行 |
| [09:04] | After picking the best players, | 在选择了最佳队员后 |
| [09:06] | I was finally crushing at gym class. | 我终于在体育课上所向披靡 |
| [09:08] | Also crushed my friends spirits. | 也击垮了我朋友的精神 |
| [09:10] | Enough! This game has made a mockery of physical education. | 够了 这场比赛嘲弄了体育教育 |
| [09:13] | Now, I’m not gonna name names, but there’s a young man in here | 我不会公开点名 但这里有一位年轻人 |
| [09:16] | with big ideas and small conviction. | 想法不错 说服力却不够 |
| [09:19] | Adam. Is Adam. | 亚当 是亚当 |
| [09:21] | That’s right, foreign kid. | 对 外国小子 |
| [09:22] | Coach was sold a bill of goods on how to make this class fair, | 教练我既然说了要让体育课公平 |
| [09:24] | and he will deliver on that promise. | 就会信守诺言 |
| [09:27] | So, next class, we’ll have the same teams, | 所以下节课 队伍人员不变 |
| [09:30] | but, Dave Kim, you pick the game. | 但是 金戴夫 比什么你选 |
| [09:32] | It can be anything you want — | 想比什么都行 |
| [09:33] | chess, word puzzles, something with a calculator. | 国际象棋 字谜 用计算器的 |
| [09:37] | All right, then. I choose Dungeons & Dragons. | 好的 我选”龙与地下城”之 |
| [09:42] | “The Ghost Tower of Inverness.” | “因弗内斯幽灵塔” |
| [09:44] | What’s happening? Why is half the class gasping? | 出什么事了 为什么一半人在吸凉气 |
| [09:47] | Tournament module. | 联赛模组 |
| [09:49] | What he said, then. Okay. | 照他说的 好的 |
| [09:51] | Then — And the winners get free pizza and losers run laps. | 胜队吃免费披萨 输队跑圈 |
| [09:55] | I’m gonna eat so much pepperoni. | 我要吃好多的意式辣香肠 |
| [09:57] | One slice per kid. | 一人一小块 |
| [10:01] | After deciding Carnegie Mellon was too far for Erica, | 在决定卡内基梅隆大学对爱丽卡来说太远了后 |
| [10:03] | my dad had an idea for a different college choice — | 我爸想到了一个不同大学的选择 |
| [10:06] | one a lot closer to home. | 离家近得多的选择 |
| [10:07] | What the hell, Murray? | 你做什么 默里 |
| [10:08] | I know you’re exploring your many options for next year, | 我知道你在众多选择中挑选明年要去的学校 |
| [10:12] | but the way I see it, there’s just one. | 但在我看来 只有一个选择 |
| [10:14] | Yeah, CMU. | 对 卡内基梅隆大学 |
| [10:15] | Goldberg U. | 金伯格大学 |
| [10:16] | Why go to college hundreds of miles away | 为什么要去千里外的大学 |
| [10:19] | when you can enjoy the comforts of campus life | 你明明可以就在家里享受 |
| [10:21] | right here at home? | 舒适的校园生活 |
| [10:23] | And so began the worst college tour of all time. | 于是有史以来最糟糕的大学参观开始了 |
| [10:26] | The school cafeteria. | 这里是学校食堂 |
| [10:28] | It did not start out strong… | 开始就不吸引人 |
| [10:30] | Shrimp parm three times a week. | 一周吃三次虾卷 |
| [10:32] | …and then it got worse… | 然后就更差劲了 |
| [10:33] | Our state-of-the-art dorm room. | 我们条件最优越的宿舍 |
| [10:35] | …much worse… | 差劲死了 |
| [10:36] | And don’t forget our school mascot, | 别忘了我们的学校吉祥物 |
| [10:38] | the mighty Cockapoo. | 威猛卷毛狗 |
| [10:39] | …and finally downright stupid. | 最终彻底变成白痴之举 |
| [10:41] | Here’s our student lounge. | 这是我们的学生休闲室 |
| [10:43] | Oh, look! | 看 |
| [10:44] | One of our esteemed faculty has stopped by. | 我们一位受人尊敬的老师在这里 |
| [10:47] | I can’t get over it. | 我就是放不下这个 |
| [10:48] | He throws a party in his dorm room | 他在他的宿舍里开派对 |
| [10:51] | after specifically being told not to. | 在特别被告知不可以之后 |
| [10:54] | We can’t fire him. He’s got tenure. | 我们不能炒掉他 他获得了终身职位 |
| [10:56] | But the point is, you are going to Goldberg U. | 但重点是 你要上金伯格大学 |
| [10:58] | Wait, so you spent your whole life | 慢着 你这辈子 |
| [11:00] | saying you wanted your kids out of the house, | 都在说你要你的孩子离开家 |
| [11:02] | and now you want me to stay forever? | 现在你却要我永远住在这里吗 |
| [11:04] | Yes. | 是的 |
| [11:05] | Well, I didn’t apply, and also, this isn’t a school. | 我没申请 而且 这不是学校 |
| [11:08] | Murray, I’m usually the irrational one | 默里 通常我才是不理智的那个 |
| [11:11] | who keeps our children from enjoying their lives, not you. | 阻挠我们的孩子享受他们的生活 你不是 |
| [11:13] | All right, look at this movie. | 看这部电影 |
| [11:15] | That’s what college is. | 大学是这个样子的 |
| [11:17] | Do you want Erica to end up in a hot tub | 你要爱丽卡和商人老头子 |
| [11:19] | with an elderly businessman? | 一起泡按摩浴缸吗 |
| [11:21] | Okay, you’re kind of taking | 你把这部电影 |
| [11:23] | some of the tickle out of the movie for me. | 带给我的乐子全毁了 |
| [11:25] | Our daughter deserves a first-class education. | 我们的女儿应该获得一流的教育 |
| [11:28] | She needs to experience life. | 她需要体验生活 |
| [11:30] | She can experience it here where she’s safe | 她可以在这里体验 在这里她是安全的 |
| [11:33] | and we can protect her. | 我们可以保护她 |
| [11:34] | End of words! | 没得商量 |
| [11:36] | Good. Now I can finally hear “Back to School.” | 很好 我终于可以听到《回到学堂》了 |
| [11:39] | What is it with you and this movie? | 你和这部电影到底是怎么回事 |
| [11:40] | He’s living the dream. | 他的梦想成真了 |
| [11:42] | I mean, what parent wouldn’t want to go back to school with his kid? | 哪有家长不想和孩子一起上学的 |
| [11:45] | But a parent can’t really do that. | 但家长不能这样做 |
| [11:47] | But he does. | 但他做到了 |
| [11:49] | He does? | 他做到了吗 |
| [11:50] | At my mom was putting together a plan, | 我妈在想办法时 |
| [11:52] | I was planning a D&D victory. | 我在计划”龙与地下城”的胜利 |
| [11:54] | Okay, it’s been two hours, and there’s been a lot of wrestling | 已经两小时了 有很多的摔跤 |
| [11:58] | and confusion on why D&D is a thing, | 以及对”龙与地下城”是个东西的困惑 |
| [12:01] | but here we are, so let’s just continue. | 但既来之 就继续吧 |
| [12:04] | Zinethar the priest, your move. | 泽尼萨牧师 到你行动了 |
| [12:05] | My move is I change my name to Dick Biggens. | 我的行动是 将名字改成迪克·比根斯 |
| [12:11] | You can’t change your name. | 你不能改名字 |
| [12:13] | I meant you’re facing a deadly, gelatinous cube. | 你面对一个致命的黏胶立方怪 |
| [12:16] | How do you evade it? | 你怎么逃脱 |
| [12:17] | Evade it? Let’s kick that Jell-O’s ass. | 逃脱 我们让这个果冻尝尝厉害 |
| [12:19] | Yeah. | 对 |
| [12:20] | It’s a gelatinous cube. | 这是黏胶立方怪 |
| [12:21] | If you attack it, it’ll slurp you up and digest you alive. | 如果你攻击它 它会活活吃掉并消化你 |
| [12:25] | Sweet! Look at that busty hot chick. | 太棒了 看那个大咪咪美女 |
| [12:28] | That’s not a chick. | 这不是美女 |
| [12:29] | It’s a Dryad, a deadly tree sprite. | 这是卓雅 夺命树妖 |
| [12:31] | Can my guy make out with her? | 我的角色可以和她亲热吗 |
| [12:32] | I want to make out with her, too. | 我也要和她亲热 |
| [12:33] | What do I got to roll? | 我得掷多少点 |
| [12:34] | Fine. | 好吧 |
| [12:35] | A Dryad suddenly appears. | 卓雅突然出现 |
| [12:37] | If you roll a 20, you can kiss her. | 你掷出20就可以亲她 |
| [12:38] | If not, we move on. | 掷不出就继续走 |
| [12:45] | I take her back to my apartment, and we do stuff. | 我带她回公寓搞点什么 |
| [12:48] | There’s no apartment. | 根本没有公寓 |
| [12:49] | If you won’t let me get busy with the tree lady, | 如果你不让我和树妖亲热 |
| [12:51] | then I stab the Jell-O man in his face. | 那我就捅果冻人的脸 |
| [12:53] | And you’re paralyzed and slowly eaten alive. | 你麻痹了 被慢慢地生生吃掉了 |
| [12:57] | End of game. | 游戏结束 |
| [12:58] | I’ve heard enough. | 我受不了了 |
| [12:59] | Time for Barry to fix this. | 是时候巴瑞来救场了 |
| [13:01] | Where did he come from? | 他哪里冒出来的 |
| [13:02] | He does that. | 这是他的强项 |
| [13:03] | Just go away. This is hopeless. | 走吧 没救了 |
| [13:05] | That’s where you’re wrong. | 你错了 |
| [13:06] | The only problem is, you guys don’t speak the same language. | 唯一的问题是 你们语言不通 |
| [13:09] | You speak lazy-eyed nerd, | 你用的是斜眼呆子语言 |
| [13:11] | and, like me, you speak awesome, all-star athlete. | 和我一样 你们说的是超棒的全明星运动员语言 |
| [13:13] | Tater “T”? | 炸土豆泥走起 |
| [13:14] | – Score. – Yeah, man. | -漂亮 -好的 伙计 |
| [13:15] | I like this bro. | 我喜欢这哥们 |
| [13:16] | Of course you do. | 当然了 |
| [13:18] | Even though I’m ripped like you, my body has also been infected | 尽管我和你们一样是肌肉男 但我的身体 |
| [13:21] | by my brother’s crippling geekery. | 也被我弟严重的呆子气感染了 |
| [13:23] | I tried to fight it, but it’s too powerful. | 我想反抗 但力量太强大了 |
| [13:25] | And it’s led to this. | 结果就是这个 |
| [13:28] | Dude, you created a D&D character? | 兄弟 你创造了一个”龙与地下城”角色 |
| [13:30] | Lord Big of Tasty. | 大王甜甜 |
| [13:33] | I wanted one ready in case you asked me to play, | 我要准备好 以免你找我一起玩 |
| [13:35] | but… you never did. | 但你从来没问过我 |
| [13:37] | I just assumed you didn’t care. | 我以为你不喜欢这个 |
| [13:39] | Point is, if this crazy-jacked bro | 重点是 如果这个疯狂运动男哥们 |
| [13:42] | can learn how to play D&D, | 可以学会玩”龙与地下城” |
| [13:44] | other super-shredded bros can, too. | 其他超级肌肉男兄弟也一样可以 |
| [13:46] | I mean, sure, we’re shredded, but we suck at this game. | 没错 我们有肌肉 但我们玩不好这个游戏 |
| [13:49] | Adam keeps yelling at us and hurting our feelings. | 亚当一直吼我们 伤害我们的感情 |
| [13:51] | That’s ’cause you used a lightning-bolt spell | 那是因为你们在水下混战中 |
| [13:54] | in an underwater melee like a bunch of scrubs. | 用闪电咒语 像一帮菜鸟一样 |
| [13:56] | We’re trying our best. | 我们尽力了 |
| [13:58] | We’re just not good at it like you. | 我们只是没你那么厉害 |
| [13:59] | Do you have any idea how it feels to — to suck so bad? | 你知道这么差劲是什么感觉吗 |
| [14:02] | Actually, I do — when I play basketball. | 我知道 在我打篮球的时候 |
| [14:06] | I-I didn’t know that. | 我不知道这个 |
| [14:08] | Yeah, man. Sorry. | 对 伙计 抱歉 |
| [14:10] | All right. Lord Big of Tasty, teach us how to win. | 好的 大王甜甜 教我们怎么取胜 |
| [14:13] | I shall. | 我会的 |
| [14:14] | But first… | 但首先 |
| [14:15] | coming off the top rope! | 泰山压顶 |
| [14:22] | Hey, boopie. | 宝贝 |
| [14:23] | Go away. | 走开 |
| [14:24] | Look, I wanted to apologize for your dad. | 我是来为你父亲道歉的 |
| [14:27] | Some people just don’t understand | 有些人就是不懂 |
| [14:29] | the boundary between parent and child. | 家长与孩子间的界限 |
| [14:31] | Are you high on nail polish? | 你吸指甲油吸嗨了吗 |
| [14:33] | I never went to college. | 我没上过大学 |
| [14:35] | This whole thing has made me realize | 这件事让我意识到 |
| [14:37] | everything I missed out on, and at the end of the day, | 我错过的所有 毕竟 |
| [14:41] | I couldn’t bear it if you missed out on those things, too. | 我无法忍受你也错过这些 |
| [14:44] | Really? | 真的吗 |
| [14:45] | Trust me, college is gonna be amazing. | 相信我 大学生活会非常棒的 |
| [14:48] | We are gonna have so much fun. | 我们会非常开心的 |
| [14:50] | Oh, my God. Thank you s– | 我的天 太感… |
| [14:52] | Wait. “We”? | 慢着 “我们” |
| [14:53] | Yes. Crazy story. | 对 说来好笑 |
| [14:54] | I was watching this movie with Pops, and — | 我和老爷子一起看这部电影 |
| [14:56] | Please don’t say “Back to School.” | 拜托别说是《回到学堂》 |
| [14:58] | It was “Back to School,” And I realized that could be us. | 就是《回到学堂》 我意识到我们也可以这样 |
| [15:03] | No! Dad! | 不 爸 |
| [15:04] | Wherever you are sitting or eating in this house, | 不管你正在家里哪里坐着或吃东西 |
| [15:06] | come to my room immediately. | 马上到我房间来 |
| [15:07] | It’s an emergency. | 紧急事件 |
| [15:08] | I was both sitting and eating, so this better be worth it. | 我正坐着吃东西 你叫我来最好理由充分 |
| [15:11] | I’m going to Carnegie Mellon with Erica. | 我要和爱丽卡一起上卡内基梅隆大学 |
| [15:13] | – No. – We’re gonna be roommates. | -不 -我们会做室友 |
| [15:14] | – No! – We’re gonna sneak in | -不 -我们会偷偷带进 |
| [15:15] | a hot plate to cook ramen soup. | 电炉煮面条汤 |
| [15:18] | – Never! – And then we’re gonna | -别想 -然后我们 |
| [15:18] | rush the same sorority. | 加入同一个女生联谊会 |
| [15:19] | This is a nightmare. | 这是噩梦 |
| [15:20] | And I’ll be her mother and her sister. | 我会是她的母亲兼姐妹 |
| [15:22] | Kill me. | 杀了我 |
| [15:23] | She’s right, Beverly. | 她说得对 贝弗莉 |
| [15:24] | You’re acting nuts. | 你完全疯了 |
| [15:25] | Yes. Thank you. | 是 谢谢 |
| [15:26] | ‘Cause she’s obviously not going away at all. | 因为她显然不会去 |
| [15:28] | Erica’s staying here and being my little peanut. | 爱丽卡会留在家做我的小花生 |
| [15:31] | What is wrong with you people?! | 你们有什么毛病 |
| [15:32] | Seriously, I get no respect! | 说真的 完全不尊重我 |
| [15:35] | No respect. | 一点尊重也没有 |
| [15:36] | That’s exactly what Rodney Dangerzone says. | 罗德尼·丹泽祖也是这样说的 |
| [15:39] | See? We are on the same team. | 瞧 我们是同一队的 |
| [15:41] | No, we’re not. | 我们不是 |
| [15:42] | If either of you were on my team, | 你们中要是有谁和我一队 |
| [15:44] | you would actually hear my hopes and dreams | 就会听进去我的希望和梦想是什么 |
| [15:46] | and not try to take them away or make them about you. | 不会夺走我的希望和梦想 只考虑自己 |
| [15:49] | So just forget all of it. | 算了吧 |
| [15:51] | I won’t go to college at all. | 我不上大学了 |
| [15:56] | I guess we both really blew it here, huh? | 我想我们这次真的办砸了 |
| [15:59] | Mostly you. | 主要怪你 |
| [16:00] | As my parents were facing off against Erica, | 我父母面对爱丽卡时 |
| [16:02] | our school gym’s about to witness | 我们学校的体育馆将见证 |
| [16:04] | the face-off of a lifetime. | 一场千载难逢的对决 |
| [16:06] | Looks like Goldberg and his merry band of meatheads | 看来金伯格和他的笨蛋队友 |
| [16:08] | are a no show. | 没出现 |
| [16:09] | Congrats, boys. | 恭喜了 小伙子们 |
| [16:10] | You just earned yourself a cheese pizza. | 你们赢得了芝士披萨 |
| [16:11] | I have been in real dungeon. | 我曾经去过真正的地牢[地下城] |
| [16:16] | But we did show — ready to roll…some dice. | 但我们出现了 准备好掷骰子了 |
| [16:20] | Dungeons & Dragons, anyone? | 有人玩”龙与地下城”吗 |
| [16:22] | Whatever. By the end of this game, | 随便 游戏结束时 |
| [16:23] | you guys aren’t gonna know what end | 你们不会知道你们握着的 |
| [16:24] | of the Staff of the Magi you’re holding. | 是大法师之杖的哪一头 |
| [16:26] | Well, if you’re casting confusion, | 如果你施困惑术 |
| [16:28] | the Staff of the Magi gives the user a plus-two | 大法师之杖给使用者 |
| [16:30] | on saves versus magic, so, uh, good luck with that. | 在豁免对抗魔法时加两级 所以 祝你好运 |
| [16:34] | They’ve learned our ways. | 他们掌握了我们的方法 |
| [16:36] | Enough talk. Let the battle begin. | 废话少说 战斗开始 |
| [16:48] | Dude! | 伙计 |
| [16:51] | I cast cure light wounds. | 我施治疗轻伤术 |
| [16:53] | I draw my Staff of Striking. | 我拔出攻击之杖 |
| [16:54] | Lightning bolt! Lightning bolt! | 闪电术 闪电术 |
| [16:56] | Thank you, cloak of displacement. | 谢谢你 位移斗篷 |
| [16:58] | Corbett, you’re dead. | 科比特 你死了 |
| [17:00] | Taz Money, the basilisk turns you to stone. | 塔兹哥 蛇怪把你变成石头了 |
| [17:03] | Face! | 认栽吧 |
| [17:05] | Sirota, you’re out. | 西若塔 你出局了 |
| [17:06] | Come on, DM. | 拜托 城主 |
| [17:07] | What kind of call is that? | 这算什么裁决 |
| [17:09] | That day, the most amazing thing happened. | 那一天 最神奇的事发生了 |
| [17:11] | It was no longer jocks versus scrubs. | 不再是体育尖子生对抗菜鸟 |
| [17:13] | We were a class united in one belief — | 我们是团结起来的班级 因为我们有着同一信念 |
| [17:16] | D&D was awesome. | 那就是”龙与地下城”帅呆了 |
| [17:18] | It was the greatest game ever played in any gym class, | 这是所有体育课上举行过的最棒的比赛 |
| [17:21] | and we loved it. | 我们爱死了 |
| [17:22] | Except for Coach Mellor, | 除了梅勒教练 |
| [17:24] | who didn’t realize it would last four hours. | 他不知道游戏会持续四小时 |
| [17:26] | It’s 6:30 P.M. I just want my life back. | 现在是晚上6点半了 我只想过回正常的生活 |
| [17:29] | In the end, two were left standing — | 到最后 只剩两个人了 |
| [17:31] | me and the friend I betrayed. | 我和我背叛的朋友 |
| [17:34] | Our D&D game was ending, | 我们的”龙与地下城”游戏要结束了 |
| [17:35] | and with one last move, | 只差最后一步 |
| [17:36] | I would become a gym-class hero. | 我就会成为体育课英雄 |
| [17:38] | All right, Goldfarb, you reach the soul gem, | 好了 金巴巴 你把手伸向灵魂宝石 |
| [17:41] | you find a gelatinous cube slowly oozing towards you. | 你发现黏胶立方怪正慢慢渗向你 |
| [17:46] | Take the gem. | 拿走宝石 |
| [17:47] | Finish it up, Goldberg. | 结束战斗 金伯格 |
| [17:48] | Easy lay-up. | 简单得很 |
| [17:49] | Go ahead, Betrayer. End it. | 来吧 背叛者 结束吧 |
| [17:51] | Don’t act like that. | 别这个样子 |
| [17:52] | Me and my boys won this fair and square. | 我和兄弟们赢的光明正大 |
| [17:55] | It’s not about winning, man. | 胜利不是重点 |
| [17:57] | D&D was the one thing we were good at, | “龙与地下城”是我们擅长的 |
| [17:59] | and now… | 而现在 |
| [18:01] | you took that away, too. | 你把这个也夺走了 |
| [18:11] | Take the gem and win the game already. | 拿走宝石快点赢得比赛吧 |
| [18:13] | Please. | 拜托 |
| [18:16] | I raise my sword… | 我举起剑 |
| [18:19] | …and toss it aside | 扔到一边 |
| [18:21] | and swan-dive directly into the gelatinous cube. | 飞身跳向黏胶立方怪 |
| [18:24] | Adam, no! | 亚当 不 |
| [18:25] | – What? Are you crazy? – No, no. | -什么 你疯了吗 -不 |
| [18:26] | Everybody, shut up. | 所有人闭嘴 |
| [18:27] | You do realize you’ll die if you touch the Jell-O thing. | 你知道如果你碰到这个果冻玩意儿你就会死吧 |
| [18:35] | I touch the Jell-O. | 我碰到果冻 |
| [18:36] | – No! – Stop! | -不 -停下 |
| [18:37] | I touch the Jell-O! | 我碰到果冻 |
| [18:38] | I touch the Jell-O! | 我碰到果冻 |
| [18:42] | And you’re dead. Dave Kim’s team wins. | 你死了 金戴夫队胜 |
| [18:45] | Somebody clean this up. | 来人打扫干净 |
| [18:49] | Good game. | 精彩的比赛 |
| [18:50] | I don’t get it. | 我不明白 |
| [18:51] | You finally had their respect. Why give it up? | 你终于赢得了他们的尊重 为什么放弃 |
| [18:54] | I guess it’s not their respect I want. | 我想我要的不是他们的尊重 |
| [18:58] | And so, that day, I fell on my sword | 那天 我接受失败 |
| [19:01] | to save something much more important, | 来挽救更重要的东西 |
| [19:04] | and my parents realized letting go was more important | 而我父母意识到 放手比紧握不放 |
| [19:07] | than holding on. | 更重要 |
| [19:08] | Hey, squishy. Can we talk? | 宝贝 可以谈谈吗 |
| [19:11] | Oh, God, I’m gonna cry. Murray, you talk. | 老天 我要哭了 默里 你说 |
| [19:14] | Rough start. | 出师不利 |
| [19:16] | Look, you know how I sometimes say to you kids | 你知道有时候我会对你们这些孩子说 |
| [19:18] | that I want you out of the house? | 我希望你们离开这个家 |
| [19:20] | Only three to five times a day. | 一天说三到五次而已 |
| [19:21] | Yeah, well, the reason is it always seemed so far away. | 原因是这一天似乎太遥远了 |
| [19:24] | Then I blinked and here we are, and… | 而我眨眼间却已经面对这天了 |
| [19:29] | I guess I just wasn’t ready for it. | 我想我只是还没准备好 |
| [19:32] | And don’t worry. | 别担心 |
| [19:33] | I won’t go to college with you. Unless you want me to. | 我不会和你一起上大学的 除非你希望 |
| [19:36] | – Never. – You’ll sleep on it. | -别想 -你会考虑的 |
| [19:38] | That day, my parents started to let their peanut go, | 那天 我父母开始对他们的小花生放手 |
| [19:41] | and me and my new friends realized it didn’t matter | 而我和我的新朋友意识到 |
| [19:43] | if you’re picked first or last | 最先和最后被选并不重要 |
| [19:45] | ’cause we’re all on the same team. | 因为我们都是同一队的 |
| [19:47] | Should’ve cast a reverse gravity spell, holmes. | 应该施反重力术 哥们 |
| [19:51] | That’s pretty impressive. | 挺厉害的 |
| [19:52] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [19:56] | What? | 什么 |
| [19:57] | You got psionic powers | 你有超能力 |
| [19:59] | and you’re attacking with a dagger? | 你却用匕首攻击 |
| [20:01] | What a dork. | 真是个笨蛋 |
| [20:01] | Barry, this is the third time you’ve walked by. | 巴瑞 这是你第三次经过了 |
| [20:04] | Do you, like, want to join us? | 你想一起玩吗 |
| [20:08] | Let’s do this, boys. | 来吧 兄弟们 |
| [20:09] | That’s the thing about the adventure of life. | 人生历险就是这样 |
| [20:12] | It doesn’t matter if you win or lose. | 输赢并不重要 |
| [20:14] | It’s who you have along for the ride. | 重要的是陪着你一路走过的人 |
| [20:26] | Stop! I don’t want you filming me, all right? | 停下 不要拍我好吗 |
| [20:28] | Stop! | 停下 |
| [20:31] | Lord Big of Tasty, in the clearing, | 大王甜甜 在空地上 |
| [20:33] | you encounter a she-wolf. | 你碰到了狼女 |
| [20:35] | Fight or flee? | 战还是逃 |
| [20:36] | I do a few push-ups to get pumped up, and I ask her out. | 我做几个俯卧撑凸现肌肉 然后邀她约会 |
| [20:39] | – For sure. – Yeah, boy. | -当然 -好样的 伙计 |
| [20:40] | But then, suddenly, her smokin’ hot twin sister’s | 但突然间 她超火辣的双胞胎妹妹 |
| [20:43] | also there, and she’s like, “Hey, why don’t we all party?” | 也出现了 她说”不如我们一起开派对吧” |
| [20:46] | And then we hop into the wolf hot tub that’s also there. | 然后我们跳进那里的狼按摩浴缸 |
| [20:49] | There’s no wolf hot tub! | 根本没有狼按摩浴缸 |
| [20:50] | Come on, DM. | 拜托 城主 |
| [20:52] | Fine. If you roll a 20, | 好的 如果你掷出20 |
| [20:54] | it’s the best night of your life. | 就是你这辈子最幸福的夜晚 |
| [20:57] | One. Damn it! | 1 见鬼 |
| [20:59] | The she-wolves eat you. | 狼女把你吃了 |
| [21:00] | Anyone want to play Monopoly? | 有人想玩大富翁吗 |