| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:01] | Number five is number one. Number seven is number two. | 五是第一 七是第二 |
| [00:05] | Number three and number four are tied for number three. | 三和四 是并列第三 |
| [00:07] | What are you talking about? | 你在说什么啊 |
| [00:09] | I’m ranking my favorite “Fast and the Furious” movies. | 按喜爱程度 给《速度与激情》系列排序 |
| [00:11] | You said you wanted to know who I am, | 你说你想知道我究竟是谁 |
| [00:13] | and this is the best way to get to know me. | 这就是最好的方式 |
| [00:14] | No, it isn’t. | 并不是 |
| [00:16] | You could tell me your real name, for starters. | 你应该先说自己的真名 |
| [00:19] | My name is Jason Mendoza. | 我真名叫杰森·门多萨 |
| [00:21] | I’m from Florida. | 来自佛罗里达 |
| [00:22] | And I’m a professional amateur DJ. | 我是全职型业余DJ |
| [00:24] | And is, that a family member? | 她是你的家人吗 |
| [00:26] | I wish. That’s Ariana Grande, | 是就好了 她是爱莉安娜·格兰德 |
| [00:29] | the sexiest woman alive. | 世上最性感火辣的女子 |
| [00:31] | You wish that you were related to a woman you want to have sex with. | 你希望你跟你想上床的女人是亲戚 |
| [00:36] | You know what? It’d be one thing if you just weren’t a Buddhist monk, | 你不是佛教弟子 我就不说什么了 |
| [00:39] | but you’re barely even a regular, functioning person. | 结果你智商还不在线 |
| [00:43] | How did you get here? | 你怎么能进入「善地」呢 |
| [00:44] | I don’t know, but, please, dawg, | 不清楚 但求你 大妹子 |
| [00:46] | you can’t tell Michael about me. | 你不能跟迈克尔说 |
| [00:47] | You have some nerve asking me for favors | 你还有脸让我帮忙 |
| [00:50] | when you have spent weeks deceiving me, | 你都骗了我好几周了 |
| [00:52] | making a fool out of me, | 把我耍得团团转 |
| [00:53] | and bringing snack food into my house. | 还把零食带到我家了 |
| [00:56] | Disgusting. | 不要脸 |
| [01:00] | Ariana, we’re really in it now. | 爱莉安娜 我们摊上事了 |
| [01:12] | Shawn, the judge, could show up at any moment, | 肖恩 法官大人 马上就来了 |
| [01:14] | so we need to have a rock-solid argument for why | 所以我们要提出强有力的论据 |
| [01:17] | fake Eleanor should not be sent to the bad place. | 支持「冒牌埃莉诺」不该去「恶地」的论点 |
| [01:20] | – Should be fun. – That’s the spirit! | -肯定很有趣 -这样想就对了 |
| [01:22] | Don’t even think about the fact that | 谁都别去想 |
| [01:23] | our slightest misstep could cause fake Eleanor | 任何小失误都可能会害「冒牌埃莉诺」 |
| [01:26] | to suffer for eternity. | 永受折磨 |
| [01:27] | That’s all I’m thinking about now. | 满脑子都是这事了 |
| [01:29] | Yep, shouldn’t have said that. Regretted it immediately. | 也是 我不该说 张口就后悔了 |
| [01:32] | Bambadjan was a human rights advocate, | 巴姆酱生前是人权辩护律师 |
| [01:34] | so he and real Eleanor will build a sort of legal argument. | 所以他和「正牌埃莉诺」会立据 |
| [01:39] | Could you please just say “Eleanor,” | 不能就只叫「埃莉诺」吗 |
| [01:41] | and maybe point to whichever one of us you’re addressing? | 想说谁时 就指一下呗 |
| [01:44] | Well, actually, the fake/real distinction helps me. | 事实上 用「正牌」和「冒牌」让我更容易区分 |
| [01:47] | Does it, Bambadjan? | 是吗 巴姆酱 |
| [01:50] | Now, I know a fair amount about your time on earth. | 我已经了解你生前的种种了 |
| [01:53] | Why don’t you tell me about your time here? | 不如聊聊你在「善地」的生活吧 |
| [01:55] | Anything that might help your case. | 说些有利本案之事 |
| [01:56] | Well, in the first 24 hours, | 第一天来时 |
| [01:58] | I caused the world to erupt into chaos, | 我给「善地」带来了混乱 |
| [02:01] | and then I caused a garbage storm. | 然后又招致了一场垃圾风暴 |
| [02:02] | It was kind of a rough start, | 开端不是很美好 |
| [02:04] | but things calmed down after Chidi started helping me learn about ethics. | 但奇迪教我学伦理学以后 风波就平息了 |
| [02:08] | Okay, tell me about that. | 那就说说这事吧 |
| [02:09] | Well, I studied with Chidi every day, | 奇迪每天都教我 |
| [02:11] | and then Chidi got sick of me, | 然后奇迪受不了我了 |
| [02:13] | so I did some nice stuff to make him feel better. | 所以为了哄他开心 我做了些暖心的事 |
| [02:15] | And later, I confessed because Chidi was being tortured by guilt, | 奇迪因良心难安而备受折磨 于是我说出了真相 |
| [02:19] | and I just felt awful seeing his little, nerdy face all contorted. | 因为见他一副受摧残的样子 我很心疼 |
| [02:25] | Eleanor, I have a stomachache because of what you did. | 埃莉诺 你的所为 让我胃疼 |
| [02:31] | He is such a dork. | 他呆萌死了 |
| [02:34] | You know, a lot of death row inmates feel regret | 很多死囚犯 都会后悔 |
| [02:38] | about things they never said… | 自己当初没说出口的话 |
| [02:39] | admissions of guilt or anger… or love. | 比如认罪 表达出愤怒 或是爱意 |
| [02:46] | Are you making a move on me? | 你这是泡我吗 |
| [02:48] | It’s fine… I just didn’t see it coming. | 没事 我就是没预料到 |
| [02:51] | Well, hooking up with someone with the exact same name, | 不过跟一个同名同姓的妹子搞百合 |
| [02:54] | it is kind of a fun, narcissistic fantasy… | 是既好玩儿又自恋的性幻想 |
| [02:57] | – No, no, Eleanor, I… I’m talking… – I could be into it. | -不 埃莉诺 我说的是… -有点小心动呢 |
| [02:59] | No, I’m talking about you and Chidi. | 不 我说的是你和奇迪 |
| [03:02] | Now, ordinarily, you having feelings for my soul mate would be | 一般来说 你喜欢我的灵魂伴侣 |
| [03:05] | a conflict of interest… | 我们属于利益冲突 |
| [03:07] | You think I’m into Chidi? | 你觉得我喜欢奇迪吗 |
| [03:09] | Yes, Eleanor, I do. | 是 埃莉诺 没错 |
| [03:12] | Because you are. | 因为你确实喜欢 |
| [03:13] | You mentioned his name nine times in the last ten minutes. | 过去十分钟内 你提了他九次 |
| [03:17] | Nobody asked you, Bambadjan. | 我有问你意见吗 巴姆酱 |
| [03:20] | I’m not sure what will work with Shawn, | 我不知道怎么应付肖恩 |
| [03:22] | but we should have all our bases covered. | 但我们必须面面俱到 |
| [03:24] | Shall we start with the Greeks | 我们是从希腊哲学开始 |
| [03:26] | or would you prefer the modern British masters? | 还是从英国当代大师开始 |
| [03:32] | Chidi? | 奇迪 |
| [03:33] | I’m sorry, choices are hard for me when I’m under pressure. | 抱歉 压力之下 我做不出选择 |
| [03:35] | I know that, buddy, but we’re short of time here, | 我了解 但我们现在没时间了 |
| [03:37] | and it’s kind of important for Eleanor. | 这件事对埃莉诺很重要 |
| [03:39] | Right, which is why I can’t take this lightly. | 对 所以我要慎重对待啊 |
| [03:42] | What if I screw up? | 万一我搞砸了呢 |
| [03:43] | Listen, I don’t need the Chidi who once had a panic attack | 现在不需要玩剪刀石头布 |
| [03:46] | during Rock-Paper-Scissors because there were, and I quote, | 就恐慌发作的奇迪 你当时怎么说来着 |
| [03:49] | “Just too many variables.” | 「这个游戏变数太多」 |
| [03:51] | I need the Chidi who stormed in here and told me | 现在需要的那个是不顾后果 冲进我办公室 |
| [03:54] | to stop Eleanor’s train without thinking of consequences. | 让我拦下埃莉诺火车的奇迪 |
| [03:59] | Boy, now I’m nervous about that decision. | 天呐 现在我对那个决定也焦虑不安了 |
| [04:01] | Retroactively? I mean, h… how do you even… ? | 才想起来不安 这怎么… |
| [04:04] | I don’t know. | 不知道 |
| [04:05] | Okay, we have so many big choices to make. | 好了 我要做出太多抉择了 |
| [04:08] | Let’s… let’s start small. | 先从小事开始吧 |
| [04:09] | Do you want to use a dry erase board | 你是想用白板笔 |
| [04:11] | or the regular pen and paper? | 还是普通纸笔 |
| [04:15] | Just pick. | 就选一个吧 |
| [04:17] | Chidi, just pick! | 奇迪 就选一个吧 |
| [04:19] | Come on, Chidi, pick someone. | 快啊 奇迪 选一个人 |
| [04:21] | Don’t pressure me, Uzo. | 别催我 乌左 |
| [04:23] | I have to consider all the factors. | 我得考虑一下所有因素 |
| [04:24] | Athletic strategies, | 体育策略 |
| [04:26] | the fragile egos of my classmates, | 同学们的玻璃心 |
| [04:28] | and gender politics. | 以及性别政治 |
| [04:29] | Should I pick a girl as a gesture towards women’s equality, | 为表示男女平等 我是不是该选个女生 |
| [04:32] | or… or is that pandering? | 还是说 这是迎合大众 |
| [04:34] | Or do I think it’s pandering | 抑或我觉得是迎合大众 |
| [04:35] | because of my limited male point of view? | 仅由于我局限的男性视角呢 |
| [04:37] | I’m vexed, Uzo, vexed. | 太伤脑筋了 乌左 太伤了 |
| [04:39] | You’re always vexed. Just pick. | 你总是爱伤脑筋 就选一个吧 |
| [04:42] | Okay, fine, I choose Tokunbo. | 好好 我选特康伯 |
| [04:46] | You can’t draft the teacher. Pick a kid. | 你不可以选老师 选个学生 |
| [04:49] | Come on, Chidi. Just pick someone. | 快选吧 奇迪 就选一个吧 |
| [04:55] | Congratulations, Chidi. | 「真是好样的」 奇迪 |
| [04:57] | You filibustered recess. | 课间休息都泡汤了 |
| [05:01] | No, no, no, you’re wrong. | 不不不 你错了 |
| [05:03] | There are way more things I hate about Chidi than like about him. | 我对奇迪 讨厌要大于喜欢 |
| [05:07] | Like what? | 举个例子 |
| [05:08] | His stupid Clark Kent glasses, | 文质彬彬的眼镜 |
| [05:10] | his extensive turtleneck collection, | 全是高领的衣服 |
| [05:12] | and he loves ethics so much. | 还钟情于伦理学 |
| [05:14] | He once talked about John Rawls for two hours… I timed it. | 他有次谈了俩小时的约翰·罗尔斯「伦理学家」 我计时了 |
| [05:17] | And he only stopped because he saw me timing him. | 他看见我计时 才停下来 |
| [05:20] | Granted, he laughed, and kind of made fun of himself, | 当然 他大笑了 笑自己 |
| [05:22] | it was a nice moment, but still. | 还挺温馨呢 但你懂我意思 |
| [05:24] | He always twitches his eyebrows when he says “absolutism”. | 他每次说「绝对论」 眉毛就会跳一下 |
| [05:27] | And he tilts his head whenever I say anything ignorant, | 我每次表现没文化时 他就会侧头 |
| [05:29] | but he never makes fun of me, which is nice. | 但他从没瞧不起我 这挺暖心 |
| [05:32] | He’s also incredibly patient, and kind, | 他还特别有耐心 心地善良 |
| [05:35] | and surprisingly jacked, and, fork, | 身材还很好 还有 我喵 |
| [05:37] | I’m in love with Chidi. | 我喜欢上奇迪了 |
| [05:41] | Let’s take a little break. | 稍事休息吧 |
| [05:43] | I know this is awkward, | 我知道这很别扭 |
| [05:44] | but as your advocate, | 但作为你的辩护律师 |
| [05:46] | and, I hope, friend, | 以及你的朋友 希望是 |
| [05:48] | I think you should tell Chidi how you feel. | 你该跟奇迪告白 |
| [05:53] | Would a hug make you feel better? | 要不要来个安慰的抱抱啊 |
| [05:55] | No, I don’t think that it would… | 不 我不觉得抱抱… |
| [05:56] | Too late, you’re getting one. | 来不及了 抱一下吧 |
| [05:58] | Thanks, Bambadjan, that does make me feel better. | 谢谢 巴姆酱 真有安慰的效果 |
| [06:04] | Yet another lie. | 这也是个谎言 |
| [06:06] | You didn’t paint this. | 这不是你画的 |
| [06:07] | You got Janet to do it. | 你让珍妮特画的 |
| [06:08] | No, no, no, Chidi did it. | 不不 是奇迪画的 |
| [06:09] | I got you an awesome painting, | 我本来想送你一副超赞的画 |
| [06:11] | but then he switched it to this one | 却被他换成了这幅 |
| [06:12] | because he said you’d like it more, | 他说你会更喜欢这幅画 |
| [06:13] | and he made me memorize stuff to say to you | 他还让我死记硬背了一堆话 |
| [06:15] | so you wouldn’t be so sad. | 为了哄你开心 |
| [06:17] | This is all his fault. | 这都是他的错 |
| [06:18] | You should yell at him. | 你该朝他发脾气 |
| [06:20] | Chidi helped you make me happy. | 奇迪帮你逗我开心 |
| [06:22] | It’s almost as if he was trying to… | 这就感觉他想… |
| [06:27] | My. | 天呐 |
| [06:30] | Of course. | 当然如此了 |
| [06:33] | This is the cool painting I made. | 我要送的是这幅画 |
| [06:35] | This guy’s famous. | 这家伙老有名了 |
| [06:36] | I mean, who even are those ladies? | 你瞧那幅画 画中都是谁啊 |
| [06:40] | It would be easier to | 只要我写下 |
| [06:41] | sort out the issue of dry erase versus paper | 白板笔和普通纸笔的优缺点 |
| [06:44] | if I could write down the pros and cons for each, | 就能更容易选择到底用哪一个了 |
| [06:46] | but, of course, I would have to use one of them | 但当然了 写之前 |
| [06:48] | to write down the pros and cons for them, | 还是得选一下用哪一个写 |
| [06:50] | which is problematic. | 也就是问题所在 |
| [06:54] | Ethics team, how’s it going? | 伦理组 进展如何 |
| [06:56] | – Terribly. – Cool. | -很糟 -了解 |
| [06:57] | Well, you guys are kind of my last hope, so that’s not great. | 你们是我最后的希望了 这样下去不妙啊 |
| [07:01] | Hey, do you mind if I borrow | 我能不能 |
| [07:02] | professor stomachache here for a second? | 跟「胃疼教授」聊几句啊 |
| [07:04] | Please, take him for an hour, take all the time you want. | 赶紧带走 聊一个小时吧 聊多久都没问题 |
| [07:10] | Okay, sit down, maybe. | 好了 坐吧 |
| [07:15] | I dated many annoying guys, okay? | 我交往过很多招人烦的男生 |
| [07:18] | They would call me all times of the day | 总不分时候给我打电话 |
| [07:20] | “Just to talk” | 「就想聊几句」 |
| [07:21] | Or ask me if I’d taken cash out of their wallets, stupid stuff. | 或问我偷没偷他们的钱 这种破事 |
| [07:25] | And when I stopped having fun with them, I’d leave. | 我跟他们玩腻了 就会离去 |
| [07:28] | Usually wouldn’t even call or anything. I’d just bounce. | 通常都是不告而别 直接玩消失 |
| [07:32] | Gotta go spend that money you stole. | 要去挥霍你偷来的钱嘛 |
| [07:33] | Point is, you are way more of a buzzkill | 重点是 你比那些男人 |
| [07:37] | than any of those dudes. | 都更扫兴 |
| [07:39] | Okay, thanks for this conversation. | 行 多谢相告 |
| [07:41] | But, somehow, I never want to leave you. | 但不知为何 我却不想离开你 |
| [07:46] | I want to stay in the good place because of you. | 因为你 我才想留在「善地」 |
| [07:50] | Because I love you. | 因为我爱你 |
| [07:53] | I think. | 好像是 |
| [07:54] | No, I’m pretty sure. Yeah, I love you. | 不 我确定 我是爱你 |
| [07:58] | That’s embarrassing. | 好没面子 |
| [07:59] | I feel so itchy. Sorry. | 怎么这么痒 不好意思 |
| [08:02] | Don’t say anything. I just needed to get that off my chest. | 你不用说话 我就是想表达出这份情 |
| [08:05] | Okay, I’m gonna go. | 好了 我得走了 |
| [08:07] | Catch you later, Silly Billy. | 回见啦 「小萌萌」 |
| [08:10] | Love has made me a nerd. | 爱情让我变傻了 |
| [08:12] | Bye. | 再见 |
| [08:15] | Jianyu’s a fake. | 建宇是个冒牌货 |
| [08:17] | He’s not supposed to be here. Just like your “Soul mate.” | 他不属于「善地」 跟你的灵魂伴侣一样 |
| [08:20] | More importantly, you did the ballerina painting | 更重要的是 你画了那幅芭蕾舞者 |
| [08:24] | ’cause you were trying to protect my feelings, | 因为你不想让我受伤害 |
| [08:26] | because you love me. | 因为你爱我 |
| [08:28] | Chidi, don’t you see? | 奇迪 你还不明白吗 |
| [08:30] | This is the real mistake that was made in our neighborhood. | 这才是「善地」之中真正的错误 |
| [08:32] | You and I are soul mates. It makes so much sense. | 我们俩才是灵魂伴侣 这才科学啊 |
| [08:36] | – But… – No, Chidi, true love is rare, | -但… -奇迪 真爱难求 |
| [08:40] | like a desert flower betwixt two oases, | 如同两片绿洲之间的沙漠之花 |
| [08:42] | but true love’s also very simple. | 但真爱也非常简单 |
| [08:45] | And right now, I’m just a girl… | 就如此刻 我只是个平凡的女人 |
| [08:48] | towering over a boy… | 倾心于一个男人… |
| [08:50] | Asking him to admit he loves me. | 让他也表达对我的爱意 |
| [08:54] | I feel like her confession of love was a lot better than mine. | 我感觉她的告白比我更高端 |
| [08:57] | Can I get a do-over? | 我能再来一次吗 |
| [09:02] | I need to step outside… for some air, | 我得出去… 透透气 |
| [09:05] | and I will not be back for many days. | 最近都不会再回来了 |
| [09:10] | Dude, you can’t just run away. | 你不能就这么离开 |
| [09:12] | You have to… | 你得… |
| [09:16] | It looks calm now, but the storm is imminent. | 暂时风平浪静 但风暴即将来临 |
| [09:19] | – We’re… – What’s up, Carson Daly? | -我们… -你好啊 卡森·戴利 |
| [09:20] | My name is Jason. | 我叫杰森 |
| [09:22] | I wanna give a shout-out to all my homies up in Jacksonville. | 杰克逊维尔的乡亲们 大家好啊 |
| [09:25] | I am not Carson Daly. I’m a weather reporter. | 我不是卡森·戴利 我只是个天气预报员 |
| [09:27] | A hurricane is coming. You need seek shelter. | 飓风即将来袭 你得找个地方躲一下 |
| [09:29] | – I’m on TV! – Okay. | -我上电视了啊 -别闹了 |
| [09:32] | Hey, Janet? | 珍妮特 |
| [09:34] | Hi, there. What are you watching? | 你好 你看什么呢 |
| [09:37] | My greatest accomplishment ever. | 我这辈子有出息的一次 |
| [09:39] | I’m trying to cheer myself up because I’m sad. | 我很难过 所以我想逗自己开心 |
| [09:42] | I think I might be in big trouble. | 我好像摊上事了 |
| [09:43] | Can you bring me something that will make me not-sad? | 你能给我弄点哄我开心的东西吗 |
| [09:46] | Let me think. | 我想一想 |
| [09:49] | Sorry that took so long. | 抱歉 让你久等了 |
| [09:50] | Here you go. | 给你 |
| [09:52] | Dang. Are these from my favorite restaurant, | 棒哎 这是从我最爱的「傻尼克烤翅店」 |
| [09:55] | stupid Nick’s wing dump? | 买来的吗 |
| [09:56] | Stupid Nick’s closed down because a pelican fell in the flash fryer, | 「傻尼克」关门了 因为一只鹈鹕掉进了油锅 |
| [09:59] | but he opened a new place | 但他开了一家新店 |
| [10:01] | called Ugly Nick’s Meat Trench. | 叫「丑尼克烤肉店」 |
| [10:03] | These are an exact replica of that recipe. | 还是老的配方 |
| [10:07] | Why are you so nice to me? | 你怎么对我这么好 |
| [10:10] | Well, you were very nice to me while I was rebooting. | 你在我重启后 对我也很好啊 |
| [10:14] | Also, I’m programmed to be nice to everyone. | 另外 我程序设定为对人人友好 |
| [10:18] | Janet? | 珍妮特 |
| [10:20] | I just realized something. | 我刚意识到一事 |
| [10:22] | I love you. | 我爱你 |
| [10:24] | Okay. | 知道了 |
| [10:26] | I have one more question for you. | 我还要问一个问题 |
| [10:30] | So you also love Chidi, and you… you just told him, | 这么说 你也爱奇迪 你刚跟他告白了 |
| [10:34] | just now, right before I did? | 就在我之前吗 |
| [10:36] | Technically, you told him that he loves you, but yes. | 严格来说 你说的是「他爱你」 但确实如此 |
| [10:40] | This isn’t ideal. | 情况不太理想 |
| [10:42] | We must remain civil. | 大家都是文明人 |
| [10:43] | He’s simply going to have to pick one of us, | 他会从我们两人中选一个 |
| [10:45] | and the loser will just have to accept her fate | 输的人要认命 |
| [10:48] | with grace and equanimity. | 从容地接受 |
| [10:49] | Maybe if you lose. | 你输了就那样吧 |
| [10:51] | If he doesn’t pick me, | 他要是不选我 |
| [10:52] | I’ma start throwing stuff. | 我就砸东西 |
| [10:54] | Classy as always. | 「没家教就是没家教」 |
| [10:55] | I suppose you knew that Jianyu was a fake, didn’t you? | 你肯定知道建宇是冒牌货吧 |
| [10:58] | Yes, I did. | 没错 |
| [10:59] | Figured you two charlatans would sniff each other out | 就猜到你们这两大个骗子会识破对方 |
| [11:02] | like two mangy rats sharing a pizza crust in a sewer… | 就像下水道里同享一块披萨屑的两只臭老鼠 |
| [11:06] | Okay… no. | 不行 |
| [11:09] | We’re not gonna do this. | 不能这样 |
| [11:10] | We are not gonna be those women who fight over a guy | 我们不能为了一个男人而大打出手 |
| [11:13] | and find any excuse to rip each other apart. | 想方设法毁掉对方 |
| [11:16] | I am not going to apologize for being angry. | 我不会为生气而道歉 |
| [11:18] | You knew that my soul mate was lying to me. | 你明知我的灵魂伴侣骗我 |
| [11:21] | Yes, I did, and I’m very sorry. | 是 我知道 我很抱歉 |
| [11:23] | Listen, you and I have a weird, complicated, | 我们之间的友谊很别扭 很复杂 |
| [11:28] | forked-up friendship, | 剪不断理还乱 |
| [11:30] | but it’s our friendship, | 但情谊是真 |
| [11:31] | and I care about it. | 我很重视 |
| [11:33] | Let’s do something fun. | 我们玩点什么吧 |
| [11:34] | What would make you feel happy, right now? | 此刻做什么能让你开心 |
| [11:37] | You have a fine home, Deirdre… | 你家真漂亮 迪尔德丽 |
| [11:39] | I absolutely adore your shares. | 我真喜欢你家的小屋 |
| [11:42] | I don’t know bugger all about a shares… | 你说什么小屋啊 |
| [11:45] | I been using this as a bloody toilet, I have. | 我一直当卫生间用呢 |
| [11:48] | What’s this show called, again? | 这是什么电视剧来着 |
| [11:50] | It’s “Deirdre and Margaret.” | 《迪尔德丽与玛格丽特》 |
| [11:51] | It ran for 16 years on the BBC. | BBC电视台都播了十六年了 |
| [11:53] | They did nearly 30 episodes. | 大概有三十集吧 |
| [11:55] | It’s about two women from very different worlds | 讲述了两个来自不同世界的女人 |
| [11:58] | who become friends, sort of like us. | 成为了好友 跟我们有点像 |
| [12:00] | Deirdre, no! That’s priceless art! | 迪尔德丽 别这样 这是价值连城的画作 |
| [12:03] | I thought it was fruit, innit? | 还以为是水果呢 像吧 |
| [12:05] | Deirdre. | 迪尔德丽 |
| [12:07] | I take it the moron is me? | 里面那个蠢妞儿是我吧 |
| [12:08] | Well, it’s not a direct parallel. | 也不是完全是啦 |
| [12:11] | Okay, we did your thing. Now it’s my turn. | 做完了你喜欢做的事 该换我了 |
| [12:13] | Are you ready to take our bonding to the next level? | 你准备好加深我们之间的友谊了吗 |
| [12:20] | Good, you’re back. | 「真好」 你回来了 |
| [12:21] | Yeah, I, I know we’re short on time, | 我知道时间有限 |
| [12:23] | but I need your help with a personal dilemma. | 但你得帮我解决一件私事 |
| [12:26] | This is about fake Eleanor and real Eleanor. | 是「冒牌埃莉诺」和「正牌埃莉诺」的事 |
| [12:29] | Yes, which person is my soul mate? | 是 谁才是我的灵魂伴侣 |
| [12:32] | Real Eleanor, that’s what the system determined. | 「正牌埃莉诺」 这是官配 |
| [12:35] | – Okay. – Of course, | -知道了 -当然 |
| [12:37] | the system did screw up by letting fake Eleanor in. | 系统出错 「冒牌埃莉诺」才会误入「善地」 |
| [12:40] | You know, it’s interesting. | 说来很有意思 |
| [12:42] | Fake Eleanor being selected accidentally | 「冒牌埃莉诺」意外被选中 |
| [12:44] | and then you bonding with her | 而你与她又培养出了感情 |
| [12:46] | could have shifted the formula. | 可能已经改变了筛选模式 |
| [12:49] | Right, it’s one of those two people. | 但就是她们俩其中一个吧 |
| [12:51] | Well, I d… I don’t know. | 我也不知道 |
| [12:52] | I mean, the system might be so screwed up at this point that | 也系统这时候已经不靠谱了 |
| [12:55] | maybe you don’t belong to either Eleanor. | 两个埃莉诺都不是你的官配 |
| [13:00] | – You is spreading… – What? | -你在感染我… -什么 |
| [13:04] | Your indecisiveness is infecting me like a virus. | 你举棋不定像病毒一样「感染」了我 |
| [13:07] | Chidi, this could send us down a very dangerous path. | 奇迪 这可能至我们于险境啊 |
| [13:11] | If you can’t make a choice, | 如果做不了选择 |
| [13:12] | this whole neighborhood could fall apart. | 「善地」有可能毁于一旦 |
| [13:15] | Okay, getting close here. | 好了 就快选完了 |
| [13:17] | Just mulling the ethical ramifications of various soups. | 就是要考虑一下不同的汤会带来什么伦理后果 |
| [13:20] | Same old Chidi. | 还是老样子啊 奇迪 |
| [13:22] | I can come back for a fifth time. | 要不我稍后再来第五趟吧 |
| [13:24] | Yeah, you know, maybe that’s smart. | 行 这样更好 |
| [13:27] | How are you? Uzo, it’s been too long. | 最近好吗 乌左 太久没见了啊 |
| [13:29] | It has, it has. Look, as you know, | 没错 是太久了 你知道 |
| [13:31] | Ellen and I are engaged. | 我和艾伦订婚了 |
| [13:33] | You’re my oldest friend, and I love you like a brother, | 咱俩又是一块长大 我把你当亲兄弟 |
| [13:35] | and that’s why I’d like you to not be my best man. | 所以我就不请当伴郎了 |
| [13:39] | – Sorry? – Look, if you were my best man, | -你说什么 -如果你来当伴郎 |
| [13:41] | you’d have to plan the bachelor party, | 你就得去给我办单身派对 |
| [13:42] | decide what to say in your toast, | 还要想出致酒词 |
| [13:44] | handle problems that pop up the day of. | 解决婚宴当天出现的问题 |
| [13:46] | It would drive you up the wall. | 你肯定会崩溃的 |
| [13:47] | Well, Uzo, this isn’t choosing soccer teams on a playground. | 乌左 这又不是在操场选队员 |
| [13:50] | When something’s important to me, I can make a decision. | 如果是要事 我能够做决定 |
| [13:53] | Watch. Excuse me, excuse me. | 你瞧 请过来一下 |
| [13:55] | I have decided I would like to | 我要明确地 |
| [13:57] | unequivocally order the pumpkin soup. | 点一道南瓜汤 |
| [13:59] | Perfect. | 很好 |
| [14:03] | You kind of want to change your order. | 感觉你想改一下 |
| [14:04] | Yeah, I don’t know what I was thinking. | 没错 我刚才脑子进水了 |
| [14:06] | Excuse me, Risotto. Risotto? | 失陪一下 洛索托 洛索托 |
| [14:09] | As much as I’m enjoying this, | 尽管我很喜欢这样 |
| [14:10] | shouldn’t we be working on your case to try and stay here? | 但我们不该想办法把你留下来吗 |
| [14:13] | Honestly, how am I gonna help them? | 老实说 我能帮上什么忙呢 |
| [14:15] | They are much smarter than me. Now, hair extensions? | 他们智商比我高多了 而接发呢 |
| [14:18] | This is where I shine. | 才是我的绝活儿 |
| [14:19] | You were already at almost-maximum hotness, | 你之前差一点就算倾国倾城了 |
| [14:22] | but now you look like a sexy, tan rapunzel. | 而此刻你就是撩人的棕长发公主 |
| [14:27] | The dream. | 我的梦啊 |
| [14:28] | And how exactly did you learn how to do this? | 你怎么学会编头发的啊 |
| [14:32] | When I was 14, I had to make myself look older to get a job. | 我十四岁时 为了找工作 要打扮得成熟些 |
| [14:36] | These were the ones I used, and they are real cheap. | 这些都是我曾用过的 特别便宜 |
| [14:40] | You’re gonna want to stay away from open flames | 你得离明火远一点 |
| [14:42] | and altercations at outlet malls. | 还有 别跟人在商场发生口角 |
| [14:49] | I’m really sorry that I didn’t tell you about Jianyu | 我很抱歉 没跟你说建宇的事 |
| [14:53] | and that you got saddled with him. | 结果让你跟他凑合过了 |
| [14:55] | Yes, that is regrettable, but… | 是 很遗憾 但… |
| [15:00] | I forgive you. | 我原谅你了 |
| [15:03] | Maybe you two are soul mates. | 也许你俩是灵魂伴侣呢 |
| [15:07] | Holy shirt. | 我个喵啊 |
| [15:09] | Maybe we are. | 也许真是呢 |
| [15:11] | I know it seems crazy, but… but think about it: | 听着是很扯 但你想一下 |
| [15:13] | Jianyu is a hot dummy, definitely my type. | 建宇够帅够二 绝对是我的菜 |
| [15:16] | We both love to dance, | 我们都爱跳舞 |
| [15:17] | we were both banned from public transit systems in our cities. | 都被勒令禁止乘坐市内公交寓地铁 |
| [15:20] | I think this is the answer. | 这就是答案了 |
| [15:22] | People come in pairs here, | 人们成对来「善地」 |
| [15:23] | and if the system paired us up, | 如果系统将我们配对 |
| [15:25] | then maybe somehow i do belong here with him. | 那我就应该跟他待在一起 留在「善地」 |
| [15:28] | Hi, there. | 你们好 |
| [15:29] | Jason and I are getting married in ten minutes, | 我和杰森十分钟后 就结婚了 |
| [15:32] | and you’re invited. | 邀请你们去婚礼 |
| [15:38] | Here, we’ve got your soul mate options: | 这些是你的灵魂伴侣 |
| [15:41] | Eleanor, | 埃莉诺 |
| [15:42] | real Eleanor, | 「正牌埃莉诺」 |
| [15:43] | and a theoretical third person. | 以及理论上的第三人 |
| [15:46] | Let’s call her… Strawberry mango twist. | 暂且称其为「草莓香芒」吧 |
| [15:48] | Okay, close your eyes. | 好 闭上双眼 |
| [15:50] | Think about each of the women. | 想一下这三个女人 |
| [15:54] | Open your eyes. | 睁开双眼 |
| [15:55] | The answer is real Eleanor. | 答案就是 「正牌埃莉诺」 |
| [15:57] | – How do you know? – I don’t, but the minute I said that, | -你怎么知道 -我不知道 但我说出一个人名时 |
| [16:00] | you knew instinctively whether it felt right. | 你会本能感觉到对不对 |
| [16:02] | Well, hang on, let me think about that. | 等下 让我想一想 |
| [16:04] | – No, no. – Because it… | -不 不 -因为… |
| [16:05] | No more thinking, Chidi. Just do something. | 别再思考了 奇迪 行动吧 |
| [16:08] | Indecision caused you so much agony in your life, | 犹豫不决已经让你生前很痛苦了 |
| [16:11] | right up to the very end. | 甚至让你断送了性命 |
| [16:14] | I had a little trouble writing my speech. | 我准备演讲词时 不太顺利 |
| [16:16] | I wrote 11 different versions. | 我写了十一个版本 |
| [16:19] | Wedding’s in 20 minutes, buddy. | 还有二十分钟 婚礼就开始了 |
| [16:20] | Boy, I mean, these run about 55 minutes a piece. | 天呐 每一篇都有55分钟那么长 |
| [16:24] | I’m really hot. | 我好热啊 |
| [16:25] | Is this air conditioner even working? | 空调是不是坏了 |
| [16:27] | Yes, it is. You’re just having a literal meltdown. | 空调好用 只是你自己崩溃了 |
| [16:30] | Also, you’re not dressed yet, | 你还没换好衣服 |
| [16:31] | and we haven’t picked up the rings. | 我们还没把婚戒取回来 |
| [16:33] | Okay, well, there’s an issue there | 好了 这里有问题 |
| [16:35] | involving what I consider to be unfair labor practices | 我认为对珠宝商而言 |
| [16:39] | on the part of the jeweler. | 这种作业方式不公平 |
| [16:40] | And we never had a bachelor party | 我们还没举行单身派对 |
| [16:41] | because you could never settle on a location or time. | 因为你无法选出地点或时间 |
| [16:46] | I’m sorry, you were right. | 对不起 你说得对 |
| [16:48] | This is too much for me. | 我处理不了这些事 |
| [16:50] | You should just leave me here and go get married. | 不用管我了 你去结婚吧 |
| [16:53] | Yeah, here’s the thing, bud: | 嗯 然而实情是 |
| [16:54] | My wedding isn’t for another month. | 我还有一个月才结婚呢 |
| [16:56] | This was a test to see | 这只是个测试 |
| [16:58] | if you could handle being my best man, | 看你到底能不能当伴郎 |
| [16:59] | and, just as I predicted, you failed, miserably. | 结果不出我所料 你惨败啊 |
| [17:02] | No. No, I mean, I’m… I’m relieved, | 不是吧 我倒是如释重负了 |
| [17:05] | but this is embarrassing. | 但这挺丢脸的 |
| [17:07] | It’s okay, bud. | 没关系 兄弟 |
| [17:09] | Obviously, I prepared for this. | 显然 都在我计划之中 |
| [17:10] | Let’s just go have a nice night. | 我们出去玩一晚吧 |
| [17:12] | I’ll buy you a beer. | 我请你喝酒 |
| [17:14] | 30 minutes, Chidi? | 三十分钟了 奇迪 |
| [17:15] | We have been trying to pick a bar for 30 minutes. | 选一家酒吧 就选了三十分钟 |
| [17:17] | It is literally impossible to be your friend. | 跟你做朋友简直是下凡历劫啊 |
| [17:19] | You’re incapable of making a single decision. | 你连一个简单的决定都做不了 |
| [17:21] | Look, I know I can be indecisive, | 我知道我这人总是犹豫不决 |
| [17:23] | but what’s the harm in taking a few extra minutes | 但多花几分钟 找一家最棒的酒吧 |
| [17:25] | to find the perfect… | 又不会死人… |
| [17:30] | Chidi? | 奇迪 |
| [17:32] | You’re right. I just need to make a decision. | 你说得对 我必须作出选择 |
| [17:35] | I’m gonna look each of these women in the eye, trust my gut, | 我要看三个女人的眼睛 凭直觉选 |
| [17:39] | and figure out how I feel. | 找到心之所向 |
| [17:40] | You’re kidding. That worked? | 不是吧 真有用了吗 |
| [17:42] | Great! Go do it! | 太好了 去吧 |
| [17:48] | Ladies and gentlemen, | 女士们 先生们 |
| [17:49] | let’s get ready to married. | 我们结婚吧 |
| [18:01] | Yo, check it. | 给你露一手 |
| [18:06] | This is great. | 太棒了 |
| [18:07] | At different moments during our time here, | 我们俩竟然曾经 |
| [18:09] | we both thought that tragic Mike over here was our one true love, | 都以为这个「缺心眼舞男」是我们的真爱 |
| [18:13] | and now he is marrying whatever Janet is. | 结果他现在跟一个机器人结婚了 |
| [18:17] | I suppose you’re right. It is a bit strange. | 你说得没错 确实有些奇怪 |
| [18:20] | I’d like to read a poem. | 我想读一首诗 |
| [18:22] | “Janet, my digital queen. | 「珍妮特 我的数码皇后」 |
| [18:24] | “Janet, we can dare to dream. | 「珍妮特 我们敢于追梦 |
| [18:27] | Send nude pics of your heart to me.” | 发一张你内心的裸照给我」 |
| [18:29] | “Jacksonville jaguars rule!” | 「杰克逊维尔美洲虎队 地上最强」 |
| [18:32] | Jason, when I was rebooted, and I lost all my knowledge, | 杰森 我重启后 丧失了知识库 |
| [18:35] | I was confused and disoriented, | 我很迷茫 很无助 |
| [18:39] | but you were always kind to me. | 但你一直都待我很好 |
| [18:40] | And according to the central theme of 231,600 songs, movies, | 根据我在三秒内搜索到的231600首歌曲 电影 |
| [18:46] | poems, and novels that I researched | 诗歌以及小说的主题而言 |
| [18:48] | for these vows in the last three seconds, | 我要说的这份誓言就是 |
| [18:50] | that’s what love’s all about. | 爱就是如此 |
| [18:51] | Does anybody here object to this marriage? | 有人反对这桩婚姻吗 |
| [18:54] | Yes, it is a terrible idea. | 完全是馊主意 |
| [18:55] | – Of course we do… how could we not object? – Overruled. | -当然反对啊… 必须反对 -驳回 |
| [18:57] | Jason. Do you want me to be your wife? | 杰森 你愿意娶我为妻吗 |
| [18:59] | – Yeah. – I want you to be my husband. | -愿意 -我也愿意嫁给你 |
| [19:01] | – Tight. – So, by the power vested in me, | -棒哎 -我赋予自己权力 |
| [19:03] | by me, I now pronounce us husband and wife. | 我宣布 我们结为夫妻 |
| [19:07] | We did it! | 我们结婚了 |
| [19:08] | Can I kiss you, or will I be electrocuted? | 可以亲你了吗 不会触电吧 |
| [19:11] | Only one way to find out. | 只有亲了才知道 |
| [19:13] | Get some! Got get it, girl! | 尽情亲吧 棒哎 妹子 |
| [19:17] | I’m just going with it now. | 我就配合演出了 |
| [19:26] | It’s funny… I was devastated when I found out | 有趣 发现他不是我的伴侣时 |
| [19:29] | that he wasn’t my soul mate, | 我心灰意冷 |
| [19:30] | but now I think I’ve dodged a bullet. | 但现在觉得逃过一劫啊 |
| [19:34] | He’s a simple man. | 他是「绵羊兴」啊 |
| [19:36] | I once watched him eat electrical tape right off the roll. | 我有次看他吃完了一整卷绝缘胶布 |
| [19:40] | He thought it was a fruit by the foot that had gone bad. | 他还以为那是变质了的水果糖卷儿呢 |
| [19:43] | Thank you for being such a great friend to me today. | 谢谢你今天对我这么贴心 |
| [19:46] | ‘Course, hot stuff. I got your back. | 客气啥 辣妹 我挺你 |
| [19:50] | Eleanor, hey, I just wanted to see if you’d talked to Chidi. | 埃莉诺 我就是想知道你跟奇迪谈过了吗 |
| [19:54] | Yeah, I did. | 谈过了 |
| [19:55] | I mean, you don’t have to tell me what you said. | 你不用说具体谈了什么 |
| [19:57] | I just wanted to see if you’re okay. | 我就是想知道你还好吗 |
| [19:59] | Man, you are a good person. | 天 你真是个好人 |
| [20:01] | I swear, if I had known you and tahani and Chidi on earth, | 说真的 我生前要是认识你和塔哈妮 奇迪 |
| [20:05] | I might have for real gotten into the good place. | 我说不定死后真能来「善地」呢 |
| [20:09] | it’s my three favorite yogurts. | 我最爱的三杯酸奶啊 |
| [20:12] | Hey, about what happened earlier… | 我们之前说的话呢 |
| [20:15] | I’ve been kind of all over the place today. | 我今天不是正常的自己 |
| [20:18] | An hour ago, I thought Jianyu was my soul mate, | 我一小时前还觉得建宇是我的灵魂伴侣 |
| [20:21] | and the fact that that kind of made sense | 而这也很科学 |
| [20:22] | means you and I could never be meant for each other. | 这就表明我们永远都不会是灵魂伴侣 |
| [20:25] | Plus, Jianyu’s married to Janet now. | 而且 建宇和珍妮特结婚了 |
| [20:27] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [20:30] | What? | 啥 |
| [20:30] | I do love you, | 我确实爱你 |
| [20:31] | but I think more in a best friend afterlife savior kind of way. | 但是把你当成救星那样喜欢 |
| [20:37] | I’m not so much “Hot for teacher” as I am | 我其实不是喜欢「师生恋」 |
| [20:39] | “Eternally grateful for semi-cute, | 只是很感激有些呆萌 |
| [20:43] | surprisingly ripped teacher.” | 身材却超棒的老师 |
| [20:44] | Chidi, I also have to apologize. | 奇迪 我也得要和道歉 |
| [20:47] | It’s just that when I found out that Jianyu wasn’t my soul mate, | 我得知建宇不是我的灵魂伴侣时 |
| [20:50] | I-I desperately needed something to keep me afloat, | 我只是想抓住一根救命稻草 |
| [20:52] | and, well, you were the nearest lifeboat, as it were. | 而你刚好就是那根稻草 |
| [20:56] | And yes, we do have the sort of connection | 我们之间的感情确实很特别 |
| [20:58] | that only two highly educated, sophisticates could have, | 但那是高智商之间惺惺相惜的感觉 |
| [21:00] | but it’s not true love. | 但这不是真爱 |
| [21:03] | True love is what Janet and Jianyu have. | 珍妮特和建宇 那才是真爱 |
| [21:05] | Yeah. What? | 是啊 啥 |
| [21:07] | We would love to stay and chat, | 我们也想跟你继续聊 |
| [21:09] | but we need to find Michael. | 但我们得去找迈克尔 |
| [21:10] | Eleanor, I think I figured out a way for you to stay. | 埃莉诺 我好像想到怎么让你留下来了 |
| [21:15] | Really? | 是吗 |
| [21:15] | I… I’ll come too. | 我也一起来 |
| [21:22] | What? | 啥啊 |