时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:00] | I still believe that they would have become good people | 我还是相信他们会成为好人 |
[00:03] | if they’d just gotten a push in the right direction. | 前提是把他们往正确的方向上推一把 |
[00:09] | No! | 不行 |
[00:11] | – What are they talking about? – No idea. | -他们说什么呢 -不知道 |
[00:12] | It’s only four people, | 就只有四个人 |
[00:14] | and it’s clearly the best way to see | 而也只有这样才能看清 |
[00:15] | if bad people can become good without knowing anything about | 如果坏人不知道自己死后会有什么结果 |
[00:19] | what’s waiting for them in the afterlife. | 还能不能转变成为一个好人 |
[00:23] | – Okay, let’s do it. – Yes! | -好吧 那就这么办了 -太棒了 |
[00:24] | But there have to be strict rules. | 但必须要有严格的规矩 |
[00:26] | Otherwise, the results will be tainted, | 否则 结果就会不公正 |
[00:28] | and I reserve the right to change my mind at any point. | 我保留随时改变主意的权利 |
[00:32] | Would someone who’s not an eternal being | 有没有哪位不是神仙 |
[00:34] | please explain to me what the f– | 跟我解释一下… |
[01:07] | Hi, I’m Michael. | 我是迈克尔 |
[01:09] | You must be the Doorman. | 你就是”看门人”吧 |
[01:15] | This is wild. | 太刺激了 |
[01:16] | I had no idea this was even here. | 我之前都不知道真有这么个地方 |
[01:19] | So I have this ruling from the Judge. | 这是法官的判决书 |
[01:22] | Heading on down to Earth to reverse the deaths of these four people. | 派我去地球拯救这四个人类 |
[01:26] | It’s kind of tricky, you know? | 是挺棘手 |
[01:27] | It starts up a new timeline, | 这会开启新的时间线 |
[01:29] | so there might be some ripple effects. | 可能会引发连锁反应 |
[01:31] | But it’s necessary for the experiment that we’re doing there. | 但为了我们的实验 必须如此 |
[01:36] | So, how long’s this trip take? Hope I don’t get a middle seat. | 多久能到地球 希望别给我一个中间的座椅 |
[01:42] | I haven’t heard a joke in 8,000 years. | 我八千年没听人讲笑话了 |
[01:46] | And I still haven’t. | 你这个梗真是太冷了 |
[01:48] | That’s the door to Earth. | 那扇门就通往地球 |
[01:50] | You go through there, you’ll be wherever you need to be. | 能带你穿越到任何地方 |
[01:52] | You won’t have any other powers, though. | 但你到达之后 法力就没了 |
[01:54] | You want to get around, you’re just going to have to take a bus or something. | 你想去哪里只能搭乘公交车了 |
[01:56] | A bus? | 公交车 |
[01:59] | Boy, man! | 天啦噜 |
[02:00] | I’m going to sit in a front-facing seat. | 我一定要试试看面向前的座椅 |
[02:02] | Or–or no, maybe a sideways-facing seat. | 也要试试能看两边风景的座椅 |
[02:05] | I’m–I’m going to get so motion sick! | 我要体验一把晕车的感觉 |
[02:07] | Man! | 天啦噜 |
[02:09] | What do I do, just grab that key here– | 要怎么做 拿上这把钥匙… |
[02:11] | This key is made of the very first atoms that came into existence in the universe. | 这把钥匙由宇宙中出现的第一个原子所打造 |
[02:17] | It is one of a kind and cannot be duplicated. | 独一无二 不可复制 |
[02:21] | See? | 瞧见没 |
[02:22] | “Do Not Duplicate.” | 写着呢 “不可复制” |
[02:25] | Only I touch this key. | 只有我能碰这把钥匙 |
[02:27] | And what’s the significance of the keychain? | 那这个钥匙链有啥牛叉闪闪的背景 |
[02:29] | Nothing, I just like frogs. I’m a frog guy. | 没有 我是个青蛙控而已 |
[02:33] | When you need to get back here, make sure you’re alone. | 你想回来时 务必确保身边没人 |
[02:36] | Press this button. | 按下这个按钮就行了 |
[02:38] | Any questions? No? Great. | 有问题吗 没有 很好 |
[02:42] | Knock yourself out. | 好走不送 |
[03:00] | I-I’m sorry, but this is an important moment– | 抱歉 但这会儿非常重要… |
[03:01] | – On your right, mate! – Jeez, watch it, man! | -往右靠 -天呐 能不能看看路 |
[03:08] | Come down! Come down where you belong. | 下来 给我落到凡间来 |
[03:14] | Buongiorno. Buongiorno. | 早 上 好[意大利语] |
[03:24] | I was just on Earth. | 我刚刚去了地球耶 |
[03:26] | It was incredible. | 真是太赞了 |
[03:28] | The–the traffic, the pigeons. | 车水马龙 就连鸽子都好可爱 |
[03:31] | And I saw this place that was, at once, a Pizza Hut and a Taco Bell! | 而且有个地方 既有必胜客 又有塔可钟 |
[03:37] | I mean… The mind reels. | 真是大开眼界 |
[03:41] | A Pizza Hut and a Taco Bell! | 既有必胜客 又有塔可钟 |
[03:53] | Janet, it was everything I ever imagined. | 珍妮特 简直和我想象中一毛一样 |
[03:55] | I got to ride a bike. | 我骑了自行车 |
[03:56] | I put a coin in a thing and got a gumball. | 还往一个机器里投了币 买了一块口香糖 |
[03:59] | And then someone came up to me and said, | 还有人主动跟我搭话 |
[04:01] | “Hot enough for ya?” And you know what I said? | 他说 “天儿真热啊” 你猜我怎么回的 |
[04:03] | I said, “Tell me about it.” | 我回他 “可不是咋地” |
[04:05] | Well, I am glad that you got to chew a gumball. | 好棒啊 你还嚼到了口香糖 |
[04:08] | Damn. | 我去 |
[04:10] | I didn’t even think to chew it. Missed opportunity, shoot. | 我没嚼就吞下去了 失策了 哎呀呀 |
[04:14] | Did you also save their lives? | 你把他们救回来了吗 |
[04:16] | Yes, of course. Everyone is safe. | 当然啦 大家都没事 |
[04:19] | Including Jason. | 杰森也活蹦乱跳 |
[04:21] | Now we just sit back and watch as they become better people. | 我们只管坐等他们弃恶从善吧 |
[04:27] | Being good is for suckers. What do you even get out of it? | 脑子有病才会当好人 你做这些能得到什么好处 |
[04:29] | I quit. Eat my farts, Benedict Cumberbatch. | 我不干了 吃屁吧 瘦小版”卷福” |
[04:35] | Morning, Chidi. Blueberry muffin for ya? | 早上好 奇迪 来个蓝莓松饼吗 |
[04:37] | I don’t know, maybe. I can’t decide. | 让我想想 我有选择困难 |
[04:39] | – You all right there, mate? – Okay, I’ve made my decision. | -你没事吧 -我选好了 |
[04:43] | I want to… | 我想要… |
[04:44] | start crying. | 大哭一场 |
[04:54] | Hey, Tahani Al-Jamil. | 塔哈妮·阿贾米尔 |
[04:55] | I’m from “International Sophisticate Magazine.” | 我是”国际名流杂志”的记者 |
[04:57] | Mind if we ask you 582 questions? | 能问你582个问题吗 |
[05:00] | – Sounds delightful. – Where are we, exactly? | -我的荣幸 -这是哪里呀 |
[05:02] | My pied-a-terre, just off the coast of “Barthelona.” | 我临时落脚的地方 巴塞罗那的海景房 |
[05:05] | What’s one thing people don’t know about you? | 你有什么不为人知的一面 |
[05:08] | That I was such a tomboy in high school. | 我高中时是个野丫头 |
[05:11] | – See? – Looking good. | -你瞧 -不错啊 |
[05:13] | Okay, next question. | 下一个问题 |
[05:15] | Who would you say is the most famous person in your phone? | 你手机通讯录中最有名的人是谁 |
[05:17] | It’s not about who you know. | 认识谁不重要 |
[05:20] | Enlightenment comes from within. | 启蒙源于自身 |
[05:24] | The Dalai Lama texted me that. | 达赖喇嘛发短信告诉我的 |
[05:29] | K, will you make me the happiest man in the world, | K 你愿意成全我 |
[05:32] | and agree to be my wife? | 做我的妻子吗 |
[05:35] | No. | 不要 |
[05:36] | Do you think my name is the letter K? | 你真觉得我叫”K”吗 |
[05:39] | Just say yes. | 你就答应吧 |
[05:39] | If we’re married, legally you can’t arrest me. | 如果你嫁给我 按说就不能逮捕我了 |
[05:41] | Plus, bonus–you get half the stuff I stole. | 而且 我偷的东西还可以分你一半 |
[05:45] | Yep, he just confessed to the robbery. | 搞定 他刚承认抢劫了 |
[05:47] | Damn it. | 该死 |
[05:52] | You realize what the problem is, right? | 你看出问题所在了吧 |
[05:53] | Yes, but there’s no way to help. | 嗯 但我们也帮不上忙 |
[06:00] | Maybe there is. | 也许可以 |
[06:01] | In the afterlife, they all got better | 他们在死后世界都变好了 |
[06:03] | because they helped each other. | 是因为大家互相帮助 |
[06:05] | And the key to that was Chidi and Eleanor’s connection. | 而要实现这一点 就得让奇迪和埃莉诺相遇 |
[06:08] | If I get the two of them together, | 如果我能让他们俩相遇 |
[06:09] | – everything else will follow. – Michael, no. | -事情就水到渠成了 -迈克尔 不行 |
[06:11] | I’m going to meet Eleanor someplace | 我得去地球偶遇一下埃莉诺 |
[06:13] | and plant the idea in her mind that she needs to find Chidi. | 暗示她去找奇迪 |
[06:17] | and then maybe I’ll visit Chidi | 然后再去见见奇迪 |
[06:19] | and make sure that he helps her when she shows up. | 确保埃莉诺出现时 他会给予帮助 |
[06:21] | I’m just going to nudge the two of them together. | 我就是去帮他们一把 |
[06:23] | Just nudge-y nudge nudge. | 就小小地推一把 |
[06:24] | The Judge was pretty clear in her instructions, | 法官当初说得很明确 |
[06:26] | and the Judge is, you know, the Judge of, you know, the universe. | 而且她可是对宇宙之事了如指掌 |
[06:33] | She’ll never find out. | 不会被她察觉的 |
[06:34] | She spends all her time in her chambers bingeing TV shows. | 她一直在办公室刷剧呢 |
[06:38] | She’s watching all of “NCIS” right now. | 她正在追《海军罪案调查处》 |
[06:42] | Hey, there. | 你好啊 |
[06:44] | – Need to head on back to Earth. – Travel papers. | -我得去地球一趟 -通关文书 |
[06:48] | Yeah. You know, the Judge said to use the same ones. | 给你 法官说用之前那个就行 |
[06:52] | Because I’m, you know, visiting the same people. | 因为还是去帮同一拨人 |
[06:55] | Yeah, I almost forgot. | 差点忘了 |
[06:56] | I brought you a nice hot cup of antimatter. | 我给你带了杯美味的”反物质”饮料 |
[06:59] | I usually only drink decaf antimatter. | 我通常只喝低咖”反物质”饮料 |
[07:02] | I’ll take it. | 给我吧 |
[07:03] | It’s only 4:30. | 现在才四点半 |
[07:04] | My shift doesn’t end until 9 billion. | 我还有近九十亿年才下班呢 |
[07:09] | – What do I owe ya? – The real question, Eleanor, | -我欠你什么 -真正的问题是 埃莉诺 |
[07:13] | is what do we owe to each other? | 我们互相有何亏欠 |
[07:15] | What do we owe to each other? | 我们互相有何亏欠 |
[07:18] | That is the question Tim Scanlon asked decades ago, | 这个问题是数十年前蒂姆·史康龙[美国哲学家]提出来的 |
[07:22] | and it is the question I will try to answer over the next three hours. | 接下来三小时 我会尽力解答这一问题 |
[07:26] | Are you Chidi Anna… Kendrick? | 你是”奇迪·阿纳不知道怎么读”吗 |
[07:29] | Anagonye, and yes. | 读作”阿纳贡耶” 是我 |
[07:31] | Great, hi. My name is Eleanor Shellstrop. | 太好了 我叫埃莉诺·谢尔斯卓普 |
[07:35] | – Can we talk? – Sure. | -能跟你谈谈吗 -没问题 |
[07:38] | Okay, where do I start? | 怎么说呢 |
[07:40] | I’m not, like, the best person in the world. | 我不是世上最好的人 |
[07:44] | I’m a trash bag from Arizona, which is saying something. | 我是个来自亚利桑那的人渣 毕竟穷山恶水出刁民 |
[07:47] | Our biggest exports are racist sheriffs and HPV. | 我们那儿盛产种族歧视的警长和人乳头瘤病毒 |
[07:51] | But about a year ago, something crazy happened– | 但大约一年前 发生了一件很疯狂的事情 |
[07:54] | And I– | 我… |
[08:01] | Sorry. I’ve been flying for like, 40 hours. | 抱歉 我飞了四十来个小时才到这儿 |
[08:03] | This is Australia, right? | 这里是澳大利亚吧 |
[08:05] | Yes. I grew up in Senegal, so my native language is French. | 没错 我在塞内加尔长大 法语是我的母语 |
[08:09] | But I went to American schools, so I also speak English. | 但我在美国上的学 所以也会说英语 |
[08:12] | And German and Greek. | 还精通德语和希腊语 |
[08:14] | And Latin, just in case it ever comes back. | 以防万一 还学了拉丁文 |
[08:17] | Cool. I once got 12 out of 12 on a Buzzfeed quiz called | 厉害 我曾经在一个八卦问答中拿了满分 |
[08:20] | “Do you know all the slang words the Kardashians invented?” | 测试主题是”卡戴珊创造的热词” |
[08:23] | – Congratulations? – Thank you. | -恭喜了 -谢谢 |
[08:25] | I’m going to be honest. I did cheat. | 说实话 我作弊了 |
[08:27] | But you were saying something crazy happened to you? | 你刚才说 发生了一件很疯狂的事 |
[08:29] | Yes, I almost died. | 对 我差点死掉 |
[08:32] | And it made me want to become a better person, | 从那以后 我就想做个好人 |
[08:34] | which I did for a while. | 我也确实努力尝试过 |
[08:36] | But then I fell back into my old trash bag ways. | 但后来又变回了人渣 |
[08:39] | Yesterday, I saw your lecture, and something just clicked. | 昨天 我看到了你的讲座 突然开窍了 |
[08:43] | Wait, you flew all the way here from Arizona just to see me? | 等下 你大老远从亚利桑那过来是为了见我 |
[08:47] | You know what, don’t flatter yourself, pal. | 别太自恋 哥们 |
[08:50] | Sorry, that’s a knee-jerk reaction. | 抱歉 我是习惯性抬杠 |
[08:51] | Yes, that’s exactly what I did. | 没错 就是专门来见你 |
[08:53] | And I know that seems zonk-atronic– | 虽然听起来很”脑残” |
[08:56] | that’s Khloe’s word for crazy– | 我朋友经常这么说 |
[08:58] | but I need someone to help guide me, morally speaking. | 但我需要道德指引 |
[09:03] | And I think I need it to be you. What do you say? | 而你就是最合适的人选 你觉得怎么样 |
[09:08] | Will you help me become a good person? | 你愿帮我成为一个好人吗 |
[09:15] | Yes. | 没问题 |
[09:24] | I’ll start you off with some introductory philosophy books, | 我会先给你介绍一些哲学入门书籍 |
[09:27] | and then we’ll meet herehy. Once a week. | 我们以后每周在这儿上一次课 |
[09:29] | Great. | 好的 |
[09:30] | Ideally, some of those books will have been made into a movie or maybe a funny GIF. | 那些哲学书最好是拍成电影或是制成有趣动图了 |
[09:33] | But anything’s good with me, man. | 我一切听你安排 |
[09:36] | Can I ask you something? | 能问你个问题吗 |
[09:39] | Why are you helping me? | 你为什么愿意帮我 |
[09:42] | I’m a teacher. That’s my job. | 我是个老师 教书育人是我的天职 |
[09:44] | Yeah, but I’m not your student. | 可我不是你的学生 |
[09:45] | I’m just some hot rando who walked in off the street. | 我就是个不请自来的陌生疯女人 |
[09:49] | There’s got to be another reason. | 你帮我肯定有原因 |
[09:51] | Yes, there is. | 确实 |
[09:54] | I also had a near-death experience. | 我之前也差点死掉 |
[09:57] | Well, I mean, I don’t know for sure that I would have died, | 虽然我不知道当时到底是什么情况 |
[09:58] | but it was pretty nuts. | 但确实挺惊险的 |
[10:01] | I’m sorry, but this is an important moment | 抱歉 但现在这一刻 |
[10:03] | – in our friendship… – On your right, mate! | -对我们的友情至关重要 -往右靠 |
[10:04] | Jeez. Watch it, man! | 天呐 能不能看看路 |
[10:08] | My God. Are you okay? | 天呐 你没事吧 |
[10:11] | That–that is right where I was standing. | 我刚才就站在那儿 |
[10:13] | I was frozen here, unable to make a single decision, | 我刚才因选择困难愣在那儿 |
[10:16] | and I almost got crushed by an air conditioner. | 差点被空调砸死 |
[10:19] | This is a sign. | 这是上天给我的指示 |
[10:21] | I shouldn’t be using air conditioners. | 我不会再用空调了 |
[10:23] | The freon is awful for the environment. | 氟利昂对环境有害 |
[10:25] | That’s the lesson you take from this? | 差点被砸死 你居然还在想环境问题 |
[10:28] | Chidi, your brain is broken. You need to fix your brain. | 奇迪 你脑子坏掉了 找个医生看看吧 |
[10:35] | So in a nutshell, I have a 3,600-page thesis | 简而言之 我写了一篇长达3600页的论文 |
[10:38] | that I am nowhere near finishing, | 至今还没写完 |
[10:39] | I am absolutely paralyzed by decision-making, | 每当面临选择 我都会呆住 |
[10:42] | and it is destroying my life. | 选择困难使我过得很悲惨 |
[10:45] | Yeah, I sort of got that when you couldn’t choose a chair to sit on. | 刚才你不知道要坐哪把椅子时 我就看出来了 |
[10:48] | Well, I didn’t want to offend you | 我是不想冒犯到你 |
[10:49] | in case you had a favorite. | 万一有一把是你的专属座椅呢 |
[10:51] | Look, I know I just kind of–nope–walked in here, | 我确实是不请自来 |
[10:55] | and you don’t know me at all, | 我们俩素不相识 |
[10:57] | but is there any way to tell if my indecision is due to a brain thing? | 但你能不能检测出我的优柔寡断是否是大脑的问题 |
[11:02] | Yeah, sure. | 没问题啊 |
[11:03] | Now what we do is we make a lengthy incision | 我可以在你脸上划一刀 |
[11:06] | from your eyebrows to the nape of your neck, | 大概是从眉毛到后颈 |
[11:08] | and we peel your face back, right, | 然后把你的脸皮剥下来 |
[11:10] | then slice your skull open. | 切开你的头骨 |
[11:12] | And I just randomly stab at your brain with an electrified needle. | 用电针胡乱戳一戳你的大脑 |
[11:16] | The fun part is you’re awake the whole time. | 而且你全程都是清醒的 好玩吧 |
[11:22] | I’m kidding! I’ll just give you an MRI | 我开玩笑呢 只是给你做个核磁共振 |
[11:24] | and look at the part of your brain that controls decision-making. | 查看一下你大脑中负责决断的部分 |
[11:27] | I want that. | 太好了 |
[11:29] | I need to learn about my brain, please. | 我一定得查查脑子有没有病 |
[11:31] | Well, so you just march into my office unannounced, | 你就这么不请自来 |
[11:35] | tell me your brain is broken, | 告诉我 你脑子有病 |
[11:36] | then demand I drop everything | 让我先别忙别的事情了 |
[11:38] | and just put you in the university’s $3 million MRI machine? | 先用价值三百万的仪器给你做个核磁共振 |
[11:42] | I’m sorry, I just– | 抱歉 我只是… |
[11:43] | I freaking love it. | 真是太合我口味了 |
[11:45] | You’re so weird! Let’s go. | 你真是个怪胎 我们走吧 |
[11:48] | – Right now? – Yeah, come on. | -现在吗 -对啊 来吧 |
[11:50] | Okay. | 好 |
[11:53] | This is your hippocampus. It regulates memory. | 这里是负责记忆的海马体 |
[11:56] | Yours looks great, very strong. Gorgeous hippocampus here! | 你的看起来不错 很强大 记性很好嘛 |
[12:00] | This is your ventromedial prefrontal cortex, | 这里是正中内测前额叶皮层 |
[12:03] | the center of decision-making. | 负责决断的部位 |
[12:05] | This is where the magic happens. | 接下来就是见证奇迹的时刻 |
[12:07] | Do you see how it’s all lit up? | 看到这块都亮起了吗 |
[12:09] | That’s a flurry of activity that occurred | 刚才我让你在蓝色和红色中间做出选择 |
[12:11] | when I asked you to choose between red and blue, | 你的大脑中呈现出了这种场景 |
[12:12] | and you almost passed out. | 而且你差点晕过去 |
[12:14] | Is it too late to pick blue instead? | 现在选蓝色 是不是太晚了 |
[12:16] | It is, yeah. | 当然了 |
[12:18] | The point is, at first glance, your brain is very healthy. | 关键是 乍一看 你的大脑很健康 |
[12:22] | There are actual answers here, | 来这里真的能找到答案 |
[12:24] | data you can observe and learn from. | 可以提供观察数据 并加以研究 |
[12:26] | Yeah, man, science is all about getting answers. | 是啊 科学就是给人提供答案的 |
[12:29] | You philosophers can spend your entire life mulling over a single questions. | 你们哲学家一生都纠结于一个问题 |
[12:33] | That’s why everyone hates moral philosophy professors. | 这正是大家都讨厌道德哲学教授的原因 |
[12:36] | No offense. | 无意冒犯 |
[12:37] | – None taken. We suck. – Yeah. | -没问题 这是实话 -知道就好 |
[12:46] | – Chidi. – One blueberry muffin, please. | -奇迪 -要一个蓝莓松饼 |
[12:51] | Why choose to be good every day? | 为何选择日日行善 |
[12:54] | I argue that we choose to be good | 我认为 我们选择做个好人 |
[12:56] | because of our bonds with other people. | 是因为大家是一个不可分割的整体 |
[12:58] | Simply put, we are not in this alone. | 简而言之 没有人是一座孤岛 |
[13:02] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
[13:06] | Chidi. | 奇迪 |
[13:07] | You chose that muffin in less than a minute. | 你不到一分钟 就选好了要松饼 |
[13:09] | That beats your old record by 59 minutes. | 你之前最好的记录可是59分钟 |
[13:12] | Henry, I feel amazing. | 亨利 我感觉棒呆了 |
[13:15] | I am 100 pages into my new thesis, | 我的新论文已经写了一百页 |
[13:17] | and it is some of the best writing that I have ever done. | 这简直是我写作的巅峰 |
[13:19] | I haven’t been this happy since… | 我很久没有这么开心过了… |
[13:24] | I’ve never been happy. | 不对 我从来没有开心过 |
[13:27] | Bad! | 真悲剧 |
[13:28] | I’m proud of you, mate. | 我为你骄傲 兄弟 |
[13:29] | It must be really nice to live that way. | 你现在一定过得很爽吧 |
[13:31] | Well, that’s the beauty of it. | 这正是奇妙之处 |
[13:32] | Anyone can live this way. | 大家都能快意人生 |
[13:33] | Just decide to be more decisive. | 只需当机立决即可 |
[13:36] | Like, what’s something that you’ve always wanted to do? | 你有没有一直想做的事情 |
[13:37] | I mean, I have been putting off getting in shape. | 我一直想锻炼成型男 但没付诸行动 |
[13:40] | Then make the decision to wake up tomorrow morning and get in shape. | 那就下定决心 明天早起去锻炼 |
[13:44] | It is that easy. | 就这么简单 |
[13:46] | Okay. Maybe I will! | 好的 那我试试看 |
[13:48] | – What have you got to lose? – Nothing! | -反正也没啥坏处 -没错 |
[13:52] | Henry, what happened to you? | 亨利 你这是怎么了 |
[13:53] | Well, I was using the leg press at the gym, | 我刚才在健身房做腿部推举 |
[13:56] | and you know how your legs bend a certain way? | 你知道人腿能弯到什么程度吗 |
[13:59] | – My legs bend the other way now. – No. | -我的腿都扭成花了 -天呐 |
[14:02] | All the tendons in my legs snapped like violin strings, | 我腿部的肌腱像琴弦一样噼里啪啦地断了 |
[14:06] | and then, my foot flew forwards, | 我的脚也转了个方向 |
[14:07] | and I kicked myself in the face, | 我还自己踢了自己的脸一脚 |
[14:09] | which gave me a concussion. | 于是就脑震荡了 |
[14:10] | But on the bright side, I lost control of my bladder. | 但也因祸得福 我尿裤子了 |
[14:13] | Someone got it on video, | 被人拍下来传到了网上 |
[14:15] | and now “Leg Press Whizzer” has 62,000 views on Youtube. | 现在”推举哥”都有六万两千观看量了 |
[14:22] | – I’m famous. – This is all my fault. | -我出名了 -都怪我 |
[14:25] | I did this to you. | 是我怂恿你去健身的 |
[14:27] | Muffins! I brought blueberry muffins. | 松饼 我给你带了蓝莓松饼 |
[14:29] | No, you shouldn’t eat blueberries anymore. | 不行 别再吃蓝莓了 |
[14:32] | Read an article. The migrant workers who pick them are horribly mistreated. | 看点新闻吧 摘蓝莓的移民工待遇可惨了 |
[14:37] | Yaaaaaaah! | 惨了 |
[14:42] | Good morning, Chidi. Blueberry muffin for ya? | 早上好 奇迪 来一个蓝莓松饼吗 |
[14:45] | I don’t know, maybe. I can’t decide. | 让我想想 我有选择困难 |
[14:47] | – You all right there, mate? – Okay, I’ve made my decision. | -你没事吧 -我选好了 |
[14:50] | I want to… | 我想要… |
[14:52] | start crying. | 大哭一场 |
[14:58] | Excuse me? | 打扰一下 |
[15:00] | What is the maximum number of books that I can check out? | 我最多可以借几本书 |
[15:01] | – Is it 12,000? – Got a wild weekend planned? | -一万两千本吗 -周末想大干一场 |
[15:04] | Well, I need to find a new topic for my thesis, | 我要为论文想个新主题 |
[15:06] | and I had this thing happen that made me more decisive, | 之前发生了一件事 我因此不再优柔寡断 |
[15:09] | and a few months ago, my friend broke both of his legs, | 几个月前 我朋友断了腿 |
[15:10] | and it’s my fault, and blueberries, and I need help. | 都是我和蓝莓松饼的错 我需要帮助 |
[15:13] | Maybe that help will come from Tay Zonday’s autobiography, “Chocolate Book.” | 也许黑人小伙的成功自传能有所帮助 |
[15:18] | I mean, who’s to say? | 谁知道呢 |
[15:20] | Mate, I’ve worked in this library a long time, | 我在图书馆工作很多年了 |
[15:22] | and I’ve seen a lot of academic types | 我见过很多学者 |
[15:25] | with that same helpless look on their faces. | 脸上都曾出现过你现在这样无助的表情 |
[15:28] | They all made it through okay. | 他们都挺过来了 |
[15:31] | Once they learned the secret. | 前提是找到秘诀 |
[15:33] | What’s the secret? There’s a secret? | 秘诀是什么 还有秘诀吗 |
[15:34] | Is the secret more books? How many more books do I need? | 是要看很多书吗 要看多少本才行 |
[15:36] | It’s not about books, mate. It’s about perspective. | 与书无关 而是要转换角度 |
[15:40] | Sometimes, when you’re feeling helpless, | 当你感觉无助时 |
[15:42] | the secret is to help someone else. | 秘诀就是 去帮助其他人 |
[15:44] | Get out of your own head. Trust me. | 别纠结于自身 信我吧 |
[15:46] | The next time someone asks for help, say yes. | 下次有人向你求助 只管答应 |
[15:53] | A few hours later, you walked in and asked for help. | 几小时后 你就来求助了 |
[15:56] | Now, I don’t know if this is going to solve all of my problems, | 我不知道帮你能不能解决我自己的问题 |
[15:59] | but it’s worth a try, right?. | 但至少值得一试 |
[16:02] | Well, thank you, sexy librarian guy. | 感谢你 性感的图书管理员 |
[16:05] | I didn’t say he was sexy. | 我没说他很性感啊 |
[16:07] | I know, but whenever anyone tells me a story about their life, | 我知道 但每当别人跟我讲述他们自己的事情时 |
[16:10] | I always imagine all the people as being super hot. | 我都把所有人想象成超级大帅哥 |
[16:12] | Otherwise, I quickly lose interest. | 否则 很快就会听烦 |
[16:14] | Do you not do that? You can do it for free. | 你不这样吗 你可以试试看 |
[16:18] | I got to say, | 老实讲 |
[16:19] | I enjoyed playing the role of mysterious librarian, | 扮演神秘图书馆员太爽了 |
[16:22] | and I really nailed the Australian accent. | 我的澳大利亚口音简直完美 |
[16:26] | – Flawless. – Thank you. | -完美无缺 -谢谢夸奖 |
[16:28] | But the point is, Eleanor and Chidi are together, | 关键是 埃莉诺和奇迪相遇了 |
[16:31] | and now we can relax. Everything is finally on track. | 我们可以放心了 事情终于走上正轨了 |
[16:41] | – Status report. – They’re plugging away, | -汇报情况 -大家都在玩命工作 |
[16:43] | but we still can’t hack into the Judge’s system. | 但还是没能黑入法官的系统 |
[16:45] | Damn it, those four humans have been on Earth for over a year. | 该死 那四个人类都回归地球一年多了 |
[16:49] | I need to know if they’re getting better. | 我要知道他们有没有变好 |
[16:52] | Can I just ask? | 我能问个问题吗 |
[16:53] | We torture, like, 30 billion humans. | 有三百亿人类供我们折磨 |
[16:56] | Why do you care so much about these four? | 你怎么那么在意这四个人 |
[17:01] | Never mind. Forget I asked. | 算了 当我没问 |
[17:04] | Serves him right for questioning you, boss. | 质疑你就该被罚 老大 |
[17:07] | I think you’re doing a great job. | 我觉得你做得对 |
[17:08] | Thank you, Todd. | 谢谢 托德 |
[17:10] | No, no, no, no. | 别别别 |
[17:11] | – Why did you do that? – I’m a demon. It’s fun. | -你干什么呀 -我是恶魔 以折磨人为乐 |
[17:15] | No one leaves this room | 没黑入法官的系统之前 |
[17:16] | until we’ve accessed the Judge’s system. | 谁也不准离开 |
[17:18] | Would music help? Should I play some music? | 要不放点音乐 也许会有用 |
[17:21] | Good idea. | 好主意 |
[17:22] | Choose something deeply terrible to inspire us. | 放首巨难听的歌鼓励一下大家 |
[17:31] | Yeah. That’s the stuff. | 优秀 甚合我意 |
[17:35] | So for Aristotle, virtue is practical. | 亚里士多德认为美德需要后天习得 |
[17:38] | Goodness isn’t something that a person just inherently has. | 良善并非与生俱来 |
[17:41] | It’s something that she achieves through her actions. | 而是需要通过后天习得 |
[17:45] | – Questions? – Yeah, a few. | -有问题吗 -嗯 有几个 |
[17:47] | I wrote down “What?” “Huh?” | 我没听懂 觉得很扯 |
[17:50] | And then this doodle of a burrito | 还差点以为你在聊美食 |
[17:52] | because when I first read Aristotle, | 因为你刚开始提到亚里士多德时 |
[17:54] | I thought it was pronounced like Chipotle. | 我听成了某种墨西哥卷的名字 |
[17:56] | Wait a minute, is it “Chip-o-tottle”? | 等下 我把自己搞蒙了 |
[17:59] | These are all great questions. | 问得好 |
[18:01] | But I have to meet my thesis adviser across campus. | 但我得去学校那边跟我的论文指导老师谈一谈 |
[18:05] | Well, I’m headed that way, too. I’ll walk with you. | 我也要去那边 我跟你一起 |
[18:07] | Hey, so, I’ve been trying to figure out how to pay you back for helping me. | 我一直在想该如何回报你 |
[18:13] | I told you, you don’t owe me anything. | 我说过 没必要跟我客气 |
[18:15] | At home, when I want to get something nice for one of my friends, | 在亚利桑那 每当我想向朋友表达感谢 |
[18:18] | it usually comes in the form of something edible. | 通常会给他们送点”吃的” |
[18:22] | You get what I’m saying? An “edible” thing? | 你懂我意思吗 可以吸食的那种 |
[18:24] | – Please don’t buy me drugs. – Okay, copy that. | -千万别送我毒品 -好哒 |
[18:27] | I had no choice, | 我当时别无选择 |
[18:28] | I was in his driveway taking pictures when he walked out, | 他出门时 我正在他家车道上自拍 |
[18:30] | so I said | 所以我只好说 |
[18:31] | “Hey, Mr. Crowe, I’m from the gas company. I loved you in ‘Gladiator.'” | “克罗先生 我是油气公司员工 你的座驾实在酷毙了” |
[18:34] | Chidi, hey! | 奇迪 |
[18:36] | I got a question. | 我想问你个问题 |
[18:37] | Is it “What’s my thesis topic?” | 是要问我的论文题目吗 |
[18:38] | – Because I still don’t know. – No, it’s not that. | -我还没决定好呢 -不 与论文无关 |
[18:43] | I’m sorry. You guys haven’t met yet. | 抱歉 给你们介绍一下 |
[18:44] | – Simone, this is Eleanor. – The famous Simone. | -西蒙妮 这位是埃莉诺 -久仰大名 |
[18:47] | – Nice to meet you. – You too. | -幸会 -幸会 |
[18:49] | So I’ve got to do some MRI scans | 我需要一些核磁共振的数据 |
[18:51] | as a control for an experiment. | 来做对比实验 |
[18:52] | And since you loved it so much last time, | 我记得你上次很兴奋 |
[18:54] | I was wondering if you could just pop back in there and help me out? | 所以就想问问看 你愿意来帮个忙吗 |
[18:57] | – Absolutely. – Cool, okay. | -没问题 -好的 |
[18:58] | Well, just come by my lab at 6:00 | 那就六点来我的实验室 |
[19:00] | and then afterwards, I can buy you dinner as a thank you. | 做完实验我请你吃饭以示感谢 |
[19:02] | No, no, you don’t have to do that. | 不不 不用这么客气 |
[19:05] | Okay. Well, I’ll see you later. | 好 那就到时见了 |
[19:07] | – Nice to meet you. – You, too. | -幸会 -我也是 |
[19:12] | – What? – You and Simone had some real professor dork vibes flowing. | -怎么了 -你和西蒙妮的互动简直甜到齁死人 |
[19:17] | You’re both teachers who are hot for teacher. | 你们都是老师 而且互相喜欢 |
[19:21] | How have you not asked her out yet? | 你怎么还不约她出去 |
[19:22] | Are you scared? | 你害怕了吗 |
[19:24] | Well, it’s not impressive to guess that I’m scared, Eleanor. | 大家都知道我很胆小 埃莉诺 |
[19:26] | I’m scared of everything, and I can’t just do things like that. | 我胆小如鼠 更别提约妹子出去了 |
[19:31] | – Just drop it, okay? – Well– | -你就放过我吧 -可是… |
[19:32] | Okay, just promise me you’ll drop it. | 你保证不插手 |
[19:36] | Okay. I promise. | 好吧 我保证 |
[19:39] | So you’re into Chidi, right? | 你喜欢奇迪 对吧 |
[19:41] | I mean, forgive my bluntness, but I’m usually right about these things. | 虽然有点唐突 但我的直觉一向很准 |
[19:44] | Well, yeah, but I made it pretty clear a bunch of times, | 没错 但我都明示过很多次了 |
[19:47] | and he’s never responded, | 他从不回应 |
[19:48] | so I just assumed he wasn’t interested. | 他大概是不喜欢我吧 |
[19:50] | Okay, I’m all set. | 我准备好了 |
[19:52] | I’m just going to ask you some basic questions, Chidi. | 我会问你一些很简单的问题 奇迪 |
[19:54] | – What is one plus one? – Two. | -一加一等于几 -二 |
[19:57] | – What color is the sky? – Blue. | -天空是什么颜色 -蓝色 |
[19:59] | What color are Simone’s eyes? | 西蒙妮的眼睛是什么颜色 |
[20:01] | Brown. What? | 棕色 不按套路出牌啊 |
[20:05] | If you could take Simone anywhere on a date, | 如果你和西蒙妮出去约会 |
[20:07] | where would you take her? | 你会带她去哪儿 |
[20:09] | Sorry, is this part of the experiment? | 不好意思 这也是实验的一部分吗 |
[20:11] | It is now, yes. Please answer the question. | 现在是了 回答问题 |
[20:13] | And keep in mind, we can see your brain. | 记住哦 我们能看到你的脑部活动 |
[20:16] | Next question. You are into Simone. | 下一个问题 你喜欢西蒙妮 |
[20:18] | – That’s not a question. – So you agree it’s a fact. | -这不是个问句啊 -那你承认喜欢她了 |
[20:21] | Next question’s for Simone. | 下一个问题是问西蒙妮的 |
[20:22] | Simone, are you annoyed at Chidi for waiting so long to ask you out? | 西蒙妮 你是不是很生气奇迪一直不约你出去 |
[20:25] | Yes, I am. | 简直气到变形 |
[20:27] | Chidi, same question for you. | 奇迪 你也来回答一下 |
[20:28] | Are you annoyed at yourself for waiting so long to ask out Simone? | 你一直不约西蒙妮出去 是不是快被自己气死了 |
[20:31] | I mean, I’m annoyed with you, | 我都快被你气死了 |
[20:33] | and I’ve only known you three weeks. | 我才只认识你三周 |
[20:34] | Yes, I am obviously very annoyed with myself. | 没错 我觉得自己很没用 |
[20:37] | Can I get out now? | 我能出去了吗 |
[20:38] | No, you can’t. It’ll ruin the science. | 不能 这样实验就没效果了 |
[20:40] | There’s only one question left, and you got to ask it, bud. | 还剩最后一个问题 由你来提问 |
[20:47] | Simone, would you like to have dinner with me? | 西蒙妮 你愿意和我共进晚餐吗 |
[20:50] | That is highly inappropriate. | 这时候约妹子真不合适 |
[20:53] | I’m just kidding. Yes, I would. Thank you for asking. | 开玩笑的 我当然愿意了 谢谢你约我 |
[20:57] | – Cute. – This is a disaster. | -好有爱 -简直是个灾难 |
[21:00] | Michael, relax. | 迈克尔 淡定 |
[21:01] | How are the two of them going to bond? | 这样他们俩还怎么在一起 |
[21:03] | There were plenty of reboots where Eleanor and Chidi weren’t even soul mates, | 之前重启时 埃莉诺和奇迪也不总是一对啊 |
[21:06] | and he still always helped her. | 但他总会帮助她 |
[21:08] | Simone and Chidi are good together. | 西蒙妮和奇迪很配 |
[21:10] | I’ve been running simulations on what their kids will be like. | 我模拟了好多次他们孩子将来的模样 |
[21:13] | One of them is hot enough to be on “The Bachelor” | 有一个帅到没朋友 |
[21:16] | and smart enough to never go on “The Bachelor.” | 明明可以靠颜值 偏偏要靠才华 |
[21:19] | This is not just about Chidi. I’ve left too much to chance. | 这事不仅关乎奇迪 我已经冒不起险了 |
[21:23] | Until our group is back together again, | 我们还没团聚 |
[21:25] | this whole thing is hanging by a thread. | 事情就永远充满变数 |
[21:27] | – I’m going back down. – You’re pressing your luck. | -我要去地球 -你是在冒险 |
[21:30] | If you keep disobeying Mommy, something bad is going to happen. | 你再继续违背”老妈”行事 肯定要玩完 |
[21:33] | – What? – I don’t have a mom, | -你说啥 -我没有妈妈 |
[21:35] | so I’ve been experimenting with thinking of the Judge as my mom. | 所以我一直把法官视作母亲 |
[21:39] | – It’s weird, forget it. – Okay. | -是很奇葩 当我没说 -好吧 |
[21:41] | How are you even going to get Jason and Tahani to Australia? | 你怎么把塔哈妮和杰森弄到澳大利亚去 |
[21:43] | I have no idea, but I have to try. | 我没想好 但总要一试 |
[21:45] | Well, good luck, Dad. | 祝好运 “老爸” |
[21:48] | Nope, also weird. Just go. | 也很奇怪 你快去吧 |
[21:51] | Hey, bud. | 哥们 |
[21:52] | Brought you some decaf hazelnut antimatter. | 我给你带了一杯低咖榛子”反物质”饮料 |
[21:56] | Just a little treat for my old pal, the Doorman. | 给我的看门人兄弟带点小礼物 |
[21:59] | Heading back down, by the way. | 对了 我还得再去地球一次 |
[22:02] | You sure the Judge is okay with you going back to Earth so many times? | 法官真的同意你三番两次去地球吗 |
[22:06] | Yeah, yeah, all good. See, still got the papers. | 当然了 你瞧 我有文书 |
[22:09] | Shouldn’t be long. | 去去就回 |
[22:20] | How are we doing, Steve? | 怎么样了 史蒂夫 |
[22:21] | I’m trying. I’m getting close. | 我还在研究 就快好了 |
[22:23] | Good. No pressure. | 很好 别紧张 |
[22:29] | Someone just went down to Earth, | 有人刚去了地球 |
[22:31] | and that gave me a back door into the Judge’s system. | 利用这个后门 我就能黑入法官的系统了 |
[22:34] | Now we can see everything that’s happening with all four humans. | 这样就能看到四个地球人的所作所为了 |
[22:39] | Excellent work, Steve. | 干得漂亮 史蒂夫 |
[22:44] | Looks like someone’s been cocooning again. | 又有人被封入茧中了 |
[22:46] | You know, it would be a real help | 你下次再把人封入茧中 |
[22:47] | if you let me know the next time you were about to– | 能不能提前说一声… |
[22:54] | Well, well, well. | 哎呀呀 |
[22:57] | Looks like Michael’s been caught with his hand in the human jar. | 小迈迈帮人类作弊[去人间]被我抓到了 |
[22:59] | – Good one, boss. – Shut up, Glenn. | -这个双关用得好 -闭嘴 格伦 |
[23:03] | Morning, teach. Ready to discuss philosophy. | 早上好 老师 快来跟我讨论哲学呀 |
[23:06] | Obviously, I’m kidding. | 别误会 开个玩笑 |
[23:07] | How was your date with Simone? Spill it, sweetheart. | 你和西蒙妮的约会怎么样 快跟大姐说说 小弟 |
[23:10] | We had a great time. | 我们昨晚很愉快 |
[23:11] | Thank you again for bullying me into asking her out. | 再次感谢你逼我约她出去 |
[23:15] | Well, I owed it to you. | 我是还你人情 |
[23:17] | And bonus, I realized I was practicing virtue ethics | 我同时还意识到撮合你俩滚床单 |
[23:21] | by helping the two of you bone down. | 是在做好事 |
[23:23] | Okay, not appropriate. | 这么说不太准确 |
[23:24] | Also, not a great understanding of virtue ethics. | 而且 这就叫做好事 你的觉悟不太高啊 |
[23:26] | We can agree to disagree. | 求同存异嘛 |
[23:27] | But if you must know, it was very chaste. | 但说清楚 我们俩的关系很纯洁 |
[23:30] | We didn’t even kiss. | 都没亲亲 |
[23:32] | – Because you chickened out? – I did! | -因为你怯场了 -是啊 |
[23:35] | Yeah, I totally chickened out, and I am so mad at myself. | 我怕得腿都软了 真是拿自己没辙 |
[23:38] | Well, hey, maybe it wasn’t the right moment. | 也许昨晚时机不成熟 |
[23:42] | Knowing the two of you nerds, | 以我对你们两学霸的了解 |
[23:43] | your first kiss is going to be while reading Plato in an MRI machine. | 你们可能在核磁共振机里读柏拉图时才初次接吻 |
[23:50] | Hang on. Come with me. | 等下 跟我来 |
[23:53] | Simone, what’s the one thing Eleanor and I have in common? | 西蒙妮 我和埃莉诺有什么共同点 |
[23:56] | You both have a complete disregard for my office hours. | 你们俩都在我办公时间突然闯入 |
[23:58] | – Sorry, Reginald. – No worries. | -抱歉 雷杰纳德 -没事 |
[24:00] | – Look, listen, Eleanor is an Arizona trash bag. – Yep. | -埃莉诺是个来自亚利桑那的人渣 -没错 |
[24:02] | – Her words, not mine. – Totally. | -这是她的原话 -没毛病 |
[24:04] | Who once told me that | 她之前告诉我 |
[24:04] | her greatest accomplishment was breaking into Charles Barkley’s house. | 她生平最大的成就就是闯入篮球明星家里 |
[24:08] | He was on the road. | 他当时不在家 |
[24:09] | I snuck in through the doggy door. | 我从他家狗洞钻进去了 |
[24:11] | Tried on all his giant shoes. | 试遍了他的球鞋 |
[24:13] | One of my top five Christmases. | 那是我最美妙的五个圣诞节之一 |
[24:15] | Listen, the point is, | 重点是 |
[24:17] | Eleanor and I have nothing in common | 我和埃莉诺之间只有一个共同点 |
[24:19] | except that we both almost died, | 我们都差点死掉 |
[24:21] | and it made us want to be better people. | 并因此想要改变提升自己 |
[24:24] | This is my thesis idea. | 我想好论文主题了 |
[24:25] | I will explore the effect of near-death experiences on ethical decision-making. | 我要研究濒死经历对人道德判断的影响 |
[24:30] | I will get a group of people together | 我们找一组实验对象 |
[24:32] | who have had near-death experiences, | 他们都曾有过濒死经历 |
[24:33] | ask them ethical questions, | 问他们一些道德方面的问题 |
[24:35] | and see if there’s any commonalities! | 研究他们之间的共同点 |
[24:37] | That’s great! Why are you yelling it at me? | 太棒了 你这么大声干什么 |
[24:39] | Because I need your help! | 因为我需要你帮忙 |
[24:41] | You and your magic brain scan machine. | 你和你的核磁共振仪都能派上用场 |
[24:45] | Of course! | 你说得对 |
[24:46] | A joint study with the neuroscience department. | 和神经科学系联合研究 |
[24:48] | We can use MRI mapping to see if a near-death experience alters brain function. | 我们可以用核磁共振成像研究濒死经历对脑功能的影响 |
[24:52] | There’s something there, right? | 是个很好的研究课题吧 |
[24:53] | Definitely, I love this. | 你太天才了 太棒了 |
[24:54] | Great. | 太好了 |
[24:55] | Also, I wanted to kiss you last night, but I chickened out, | 对了 我昨晚本想吻你 但怯场了 |
[24:57] | so I’m going to kiss you now. | 所以我现在要补回来 |
[24:57] | Good, yes. I want that, please. | 很好 来吧 |
[25:05] | Sorry, Reginald. What were you saying? | 抱歉 雷杰纳德 你刚才说什么 |
[25:08] | That I can’t come to class tomorrow ’cause my grandma died. | 我外婆去世了 明天要请假 |
[25:12] | Real mood ruiner. Read the room, dude. | 真破坏气氛 一点眼力见也没有啊 哥们 |
[25:24] | Bingo. Okay. | 很好 好了 |
[25:27] | Good, you’re here. | 你来了 太好了 |
[25:28] | Eleanor, meet the newest member of our ethical neuro-scientific study, | 埃莉诺 见见我们道德与神经科学联合研究的新成员 |
[25:32] | Tahani Al-Jamil. | 塔哈妮·阿贾米尔 |
[25:33] | Hello, Eleanor. Delighted to meet you. | 你好 埃莉诺 幸会 |
[25:36] | Al-Jamil. You’re Kamilah’s sister. | 姓阿贾米尔 你是卡米拉的妹妹 |
[25:39] | I am, yes. | 没错 |
[25:41] | If you want an autograph or something, I can probably arrange it. | 我可以帮你要签名 |
[25:45] | I was never really that into her–no offense. | 我不是很喜欢她 你别生气 |
[25:48] | I assure you, there is none taken. | 不生气不生气 完全不生气 |
[25:52] | So how did you come to join our team? | 你怎么会想加入我们的研究 |
[25:54] | Well, it’s a bit of a story, I suppose. | 说来话长 |
[25:58] | It, began about a year ago. | 事情始于一年前 |
[26:02] | Come down! Come down where you belong. | 下来 给我落到凡间来 |
[26:11] | – Well done, Tahani. – Who saved me? | -厉害啊 塔哈妮 -谁救了我 |
[26:14] | Did anyone see who just saved my life? | 有人看到刚才是谁救了我吗 |
[26:16] | – It was Kamilah! – No, it was a man, I think. | -是卡米拉 -不 是个男人 |
[26:19] | – It was Kamilah! – It was Kamilah! | -是卡米拉 -是卡米拉 |
[26:21] | No, it wasn’t Kamilah! It was someone over there. | 不 不是卡米拉 是刚才那边一个男人救了我 |
[26:24] | Kamilah, Kamilah, Kamilah, Kamilah, Kamilah! | 就是卡米拉 卡米拉 卡米拉… |
[26:30] | I had almost died. | 我差点死掉 |
[26:33] | And in that very moment, I decided to change my life. | 那一刻 我决定改变生活方式 |
[26:37] | First, I cleansed myself of all the worldly possessions | 我先是抛弃了一切凡尘俗物 |
[26:40] | that had been weighing me down like anchors– the dresses, the jewels. | 清理了那些限制我衣物和珠宝 |
[26:44] | I gave them all to Good Will. | 我都捐给”老好人威尔”了 |
[26:46] | That’s what I call Prince William. | 就是威廉王子 |
[26:48] | Since he’d married a commoner, | 他既然娶了个平民王妃 |
[26:50] | I assumed he’d know some needy people they could go to. | 想必认识很多需要那些东西的穷人 |
[26:54] | Sure. | 好吧 |
[26:56] | Then I deleted all my celebrity contacts from my mobile. | 然后我删除了手机中所有名人的联系方式 |
[26:59] | Good-bye, Bono. Good-bye, The Edge. | 再见 博诺[歌手] 再见 “边缘”[歌手] |
[27:04] | Good-bye, The Edge’s real phone number that even Bono doesn’t have. | 再见 博诺也不知道的”边缘”电话号码 |
[27:07] | And most importantly, I put physical distance between me and my old life. | 更重要的是 我逃离了以前的生活 |
[27:12] | Book me a flight to Tibet. | 给我订张去西藏的机票 |
[27:14] | I’m going to live in a Buddhist monastery. | 我要住进寺庙 |
[27:15] | I need to get out of the spotlight. | 我得远离聚光灯 |
[27:17] | Copy that, I’ll see what jets are available. | 好的 我查查看哪架飞机可用 |
[27:20] | – No, I’m flying commercial. – Okay. | -不行 我要坐商用客机 -好 |
[27:23] | – First class, I assume? – No. I’m a woman of the people now. | -头等舱吧 -不行 我要深入群众 |
[27:29] | Comfort Plus. | 舒适经济舱 |
[27:33] | And there, in that humble monastery, | 在那个寒酸的寺庙 |
[27:37] | thousands of miles from the meaningless concerns of high society, | 远离上层社会的无端困扰 |
[27:41] | I embarked upon a quest for enlightenment. | 我开始了启蒙之旅 |
[27:44] | I learned to embrace a life of simplicity. | 我学会了过简单朴素的生活 |
[27:48] | I meditated. | 沉思打坐 |
[27:50] | I worked. | 整日劳作 |
[27:52] | I gave back to Mother Earth. | 回馈地球 |
[27:55] | And I slept. | 香甜入睡 |
[27:58] | My soul had never felt so nourished, | 我的灵魂得到了滋养 |
[28:01] | until one day, my former life came knocking at the open space | 直到有一天 以前的生活不请自来 |
[28:04] | where a door would have been if we were given any privacy. | 寺庙没有门 他们一眼就发现了我 |
[28:08] | Yo, is that Tahani Al-Jamil? Man, it totes is you! | 那是塔哈妮·阿贾米尔吗 天 还真是你 |
[28:13] | What up? I’m Colby, “Squalor News.” | 你好啊 我是”下层新闻”的科尔比 |
[28:17] | What are you doing in this monastery? | 你们来寺庙干什么 |
[28:18] | We’re doing a new show | 我们在制作新节目 |
[28:20] | about poverty, drug lords, gun running, | 介绍贫穷 贩毒 军火走私 |
[28:21] | weird-ass restaurants, skateboarding, and also genocide. | 奇葩餐厅 滑板 种族屠杀 |
[28:25] | It’s called “Society is F’ed.” | 节目名叫”操蛋的社会” |
[28:27] | What are you doing here, though? | 话说 你在这里干什么 |
[28:28] | Is this where you came after your sister saved your life? | 你妹救了你之后 你就来了这里吗 |
[28:31] | I am living here as a way to shed my desire for attention. | 我来这里是想改掉博取关注的坏习惯 |
[28:36] | Toigh, that’s what’s up! You got to shed that, right? | 这样啊 是得改改 |
[28:38] | But listen, if you ever want us to do | 如果你想找我们帮忙 |
[28:40] | like a monster profile on you and your monk junk, | 为你树立一个清修悟道的人设 |
[28:43] | we would be honored AF. | 我们简直求之不得 |
[28:45] | I think people would be supes interested in what you’re doing here, for real. | 大家一定会对你这段经历很感兴趣 |
[28:49] | Look, here’s my card. Think about it. | 这是我的名片 你考虑一下吧 |
[28:52] | Of course, I never called him to do that profile | 当然了 我没找他帮我立人设 |
[28:55] | because I didn’t pursue a life of tranquility | 因为我追求宁静的生活 |
[28:57] | to get in front of a camera. | 并不是为了有朝一日大肆宣扬 |
[29:00] | I did it to get out of the spotlight. | 我的初衷是想远离聚光灯 |
[29:03] | 这本书实在太棒了 我决定弃笔了 因为我永远写不出这么好的书 ——书评 | |
[29:03] | And that’s what my book is about– | 以上就是这本书的主要内容 |
[29:05] | shedding your need for validation from others. | 不再寻求别人的肯定 |
[29:15] | Publisher says you’ll hit 2 million copies sold by next week. | 出版商说下周销量就能达到两百万 |
[29:18] | – Your “582 Questions With” video was nominated for a BAFTA. – That’s fun. | -你的”582问”视频获得了英国电影学院奖提名 -有点意思 |
[29:23] | – Also, they want you for “Oprah.” – “Oprah” Is off the air. | -他们还想请你上《奥普拉脱口秀》 -不是已经停播了吗 |
[29:26] | No, they want you to take over for Oprah. | 不是 他们想让你取代奥普拉 |
[29:28] | Also, this investor wants to meet you. | 还有个投资人想见见你 |
[29:30] | I checked him out, he’s legit. | 我查过了 此人靠谱 |
[29:33] | Tahani. Gordon Indigo. | 塔哈妮 你好 我是戈登·因迭戈[金蓝色] |
[29:36] | I just have to say you are so inspiring. | 你的演讲实在是太鼓舞人心了 |
[29:41] | Namaste. | 祝你平安 |
[29:42] | I mean, you really have all these idiots fooled. | 你真把那些笨蛋唬住了 |
[29:44] | – Excuse me? – Listen. | -你说什么 -听着 |
[29:46] | I’m sure you’re already rolling in dough from this incredible scam, | 你肯定利用这场骗局赚得盆满钵满了 |
[29:50] | but have you thought about merch? | 你想过要商业化吗 |
[29:51] | Because we could, we could partner here. | 我们可以搭伙大发财 |
[29:53] | I made a fortune selling Nirvana Orbs, | 我通过卖”涅槃灵球”发了大财 |
[29:56] | which is to say, | 老实说 |
[29:58] | driving range golf balls that I painted silver. | 其实只是涂成银色的高尔夫球 |
[30:01] | – That’s awful. – No, it’s healing. | -太缺德了 -不 人们觉得有用 |
[30:05] | Wink. | 机智吧 |
[30:07] | You should be selling whatever crap you can think of, | 你想卖什么都可以 |
[30:09] | because these people will buy it. | 因为那些笨蛋一定会乖乖掏钱 |
[30:10] | That is quite enough. | 真是够了 |
[30:12] | And how dare you insinuate that I’m not authentic? | 你凭什么污蔑我是造假骗人 |
[30:14] | I finished signing your headshots. | 你的大头照我都签好了 |
[30:15] | – Not now. – Ms. Al-Jamil, it’s okay. | -一边去 -阿贾米尔女士 没事的 |
[30:19] | You and I are the same. I love what you’re doing here. | 我们俩是一类人 我很欣赏你的行为 |
[30:22] | You get to be rich and famous | 你不用帮助任何人 |
[30:24] | and not have to do any of the work of helping people. | 就能名利双收 |
[30:28] | But I am helping people. You need to go right now. | 但我确实在帮助大家 你快走吧 |
[30:31] | Suit yourself. | 随便你吧 |
[30:32] | Look, if you change your mind, I’m online. | 如果改变主意 网上一搜就能找到我 |
[30:34] | Just Google “Crystals that prevent erectile dysfunction.” | 关键词是 “避免勃起障碍的水晶球” |
[30:40] | I’m sorry, | 抱歉 |
[30:40] | but Ms. Al-Jamil doesn’t have time | 阿贾米尔女士很忙 |
[30:42] | to participate in an ethical study at some random university. | 没空参加野鸡大学的道德研究 |
[30:47] | If you want to meet her, | 如果想约见她 |
[30:48] | you can sign up for the “Get Out of the Spotlight” cruise, | 可以报名参加”远离聚光灯”巡游活动 |
[30:51] | with special guests Deepak Chopra and will.I.Am. | 还能见到一些特别来宾 |
[30:56] | Hello? This is Tahani Al-Jamil. | 你好 我是塔哈妮·阿贾米尔 |
[31:00] | I didn’t think I’d actually get you. | 我没想到真能联系到你 |
[31:02] | My name is Chidi Anagonye, and I’m doing an academic study | 我叫奇迪·阿纳贡耶 我在进行一个学术研究 |
[31:06] | on near-death experiences and ethical decision-making. | 主题是濒死经历对道德决断的影响 |
[31:09] | – I read an article about you – Will it help people? | -我读到了一篇关于你的报道 -能帮助大家吗 |
[31:12] | That’s all I want to know. Will this help people? | 我只想知道 你的研究能帮到别人吗 |
[31:14] | Yes, I–I think so. I–I mean, that’s the goal. | 应该能 我们的目标就是帮助别人 |
[31:19] | Send me the info. I’ll be there tomorrow morning. | 把具体细节发给我 我明早就到 |
[31:26] | But how had you learned about me, I wonder? | 但你怎么知道我的事情 |
[31:28] | A professor I’d never heard of named Charles Brainman | 一个我从没听说过的教授发给了我一篇关于你的报道 |
[31:31] | sent me an article about you. | 他叫”查尔斯·布莱曼” |
[31:33] | Said you’d be perfect for our study. | 他说你很适合我们的研究 |
[31:35] | Well, welcome to Australia. | 欢迎来到澳大利亚 |
[31:37] | if you need a place to crash while you get settled, | 如果你找房子期间需要地方借住 |
[31:40] | my motel has a pull-out sofa. | 我的旅馆有个折叠沙发 |
[31:42] | Although, as I say that, and I look at you and your whole thing, | 但是 看你的模样 高贵得像个公主 |
[31:45] | I realize that’s absurd, | 住旅馆沙发太委屈你了 |
[31:47] | and you should probably just get your own place. | 你还是自己找地方吧 |
[31:49] | Yes, I–I think that’s best. | 嗯 还是这样比较好 |
[31:53] | But–but thank you. | 但还是谢谢你的好意 |
[31:57] | Three down, one to go. | 解决了三个 还差一个 |
[32:05] | Sup, bud? I’ve been looking for you. | 兄弟 我一直在找你 |
[32:08] | Sorry. Are these your rocks? | 抱歉 这些是你的石头吗 |
[32:10] | No, look. My name is Zach Pizazz. | 不是 我叫扎克·皮亚兹 |
[32:13] | International talent scout. | 来自国际星探公司 |
[32:14] | I’ve been tracking your dance troupe, man. | 我一直在关注你的舞团 |
[32:17] | I think you really got the goods. | 我觉得你真的很有才 |
[32:19] | I want you to come on down to Australia and start a new crew, all right? | 我希望你能去澳大利亚 组建一支新团队 |
[32:23] | I’ll pay for everything. | 费用全包 |
[32:24] | You may have a few other obligations, but basically– | 你可能还得做一些额外的工作 但总的来说… |
[32:26] | Thanks, but no thanks, man. | 谢谢你的好意 还是算了吧 |
[32:29] | – I’m done with dancing. – But wait. | -我不想再跳舞了 -慢着 |
[32:31] | You heard what my name was, right? | 你知道我是谁吧 |
[32:34] | Zach Pizazz? | 扎克·皮亚兹啊 |
[32:35] | My life is just kind of messed up right now. | 我的生活真是一团糟 |
[32:38] | I had a really tough year. | 我去年过得很糟心 |
[32:41] | I’m sorry. | 我很遗憾 |
[32:43] | Want to talk about it? I’m a pretty good listener. | 你想倾诉吗 我善于聆听 |
[32:47] | Well, my year started about a year ago. | 事情始于一年前 |
[32:53] | Pillboi, I can’t breathe, and I’m freaking out, | “药哥” 我喘不上气了 我好怕 |
[32:55] | and I’m almost out of whip-its! Pillboi! | 我要不行了 “药哥” |
[32:58] | Buongiorno. | 早上好[意大利语] |
[33:00] | Buongiorno. | 早上好[意大利语] |
[33:04] | – Yo, what happened? – I couldn’t breathe. | -怎么了 -我刚才喘不上气了 |
[33:07] | The snorkel must have been broken. | 一定是呼吸管坏了 |
[33:09] | Yo, that sucks. | 太惨了 |
[33:11] | – You ready to get back in there? – No, man. | -你准备好进去了吗 -不行 |
[33:15] | We’re not doing this no more. | 我们不能再这样下去了 |
[33:17] | I almost died trying to rob a Mexican restaurant. | 为了抢劫这个墨西哥餐馆 我差点死掉 |
[33:21] | I have to change my life. | 我得改变生活方式了 |
[33:25] | 改变 生活 方式 | |
[33:27] | I know what I’m going to do. | 我知道要怎么做了 |
[33:32] | I’m going to win this dance competition. | 我要赢得这个舞蹈比赛 |
[33:36] | So you didn’t see any other posters there? | 你当时没看见别的海报吗 |
[33:39] | No, don’t think so. Why? | 应该没有 怎么了 |
[33:41] | Doesn’t matter. Continue. | 没事 你继续说 |
[33:43] | Homies, I almost died yesterday. | 朋友们 我昨天差点死掉 |
[33:46] | But we’ve been given a second chance. | 但我们有一个重新来过的机会 |
[33:49] | Three months from today, | 三个月以后 |
[33:50] | on this very stage in the Carmen Electra auditori | 在史密斯威尔森表演艺术中心兼电视台 |
[33:54] | right here at the Smith & Wesson Performing Arts Center and ATV Repair Shop, | 就是现在我们所在的这个卡门礼堂有场比赛 |
[33:59] | we are going to win this dance competition. | 我们要赢下这场舞蹈比赛 |
[34:03] | How, you ask? By working. | 要怎么做呢 努力练舞 |
[34:06] | We are going to eat, breathe, and vape dance. | 我们吃饭 睡觉 抽烟时都要想着舞蹈 |
[34:10] | I want you thinking about dance 24/7. | 你们要20×7的时间里都想着舞蹈 |
[34:13] | That means every day, you think 20 thoughts about dance for seven minutes. | 也就是说 每天 你们要想20次 每次7分钟 |
[34:18] | And if you can’t promise me | 如果你们无法保证 |
[34:19] | that you’ll give this dance crew everything that you’ve got, | 全心投入舞团训练 |
[34:22] | then you can walk out that door. | 那你大可以离开 |
[34:25] | Right now. | 现在就走 |
[34:28] | Yeah, okay. I’m out. | 好吧 我退出 |
[34:29] | What? Come on, Donkey Doug. | 不是吧 “傻强” |
[34:32] | After all we’ve been through? | 我们可是共患难的兄弟啊 |
[34:33] | Listen, you know you’re my boy, | 我们是兄弟 |
[34:35] | but this sounds like a lot of work. Good luck. | 但这太难了 祝你们好运 |
[34:42] | Donkey Doug out! | “傻强”出局 |
[34:47] | Damn, that’s a tough blow. | 天啦噜 扎心了 |
[34:48] | But now that those guys are no longer members of our crew, | 不过 既然这些人退团了 |
[34:51] | we can legally rob their houses. | 我们就可以正大光明抢劫他们了 |
[34:53] | No, Little Peanut. | 不行 “小花生” |
[34:55] | We’re going to do this the right way. No more crime, | 我们要通过合法方式挣钱 不再犯罪 |
[34:57] | and if you don’t like that, you can walk out that door. Right now. | 如果你们不同意 现在就可以离开 |
[35:05] | What? Co-come on– | 不是吧 大家… |
[35:08] | We still got like 35 people, so let’s get to work. | 我们还有35人 开始吧 |
[35:14] | Quick announcement. | 先宣布一个消息 |
[35:15] | Will the owner of a 1998 Toyota Tercel | 车牌号为GOTMILF |
[35:18] | with golden pythons painted on both sides, | 两侧印有巨蟒的丰田雄鹰车主 |
[35:21] | license plate GOT-MILF please see an usher. | 有一个很不幸消息要告诉你 |
[35:25] | Your car has exploded. | 你的车爆炸了 |
[35:27] | All right, ya’ll ready for the next act? | 准备好欣赏下一场表演了吗 |
[35:29] | Please give it up right now for Dance Dance Resolution! | 掌声欢迎”舞动决心” |
[35:53] | In the six-year history of this competition, | 这个比赛开办的六年来 |
[35:55] | no crew has ever received a perfect score from our judges. | 从没有一个舞团拿到满分 |
[35:59] | That changed tonight. | 今晚 实现了突破 |
[36:01] | But before we get to that, | 但宣布结果之前 |
[36:02] | Dance Dance Resolution has been disqualified. | “舞动决心”出局了 |
[36:06] | What? No, why? | 什么 不要啊 为什么 |
[36:08] | Because you have 40 people onstage. | 因为你们舞团有40人 |
[36:11] | The limit is eight. | 比赛规定最多八人 |
[36:13] | Also, one of your members tried to carjack me on my way in here. | 而且你们的团员在来的路上还想抢我的车 |
[36:16] | No, that was Donkey Doug, | 没有啊 是”傻强” |
[36:18] | and he’s not a part of our crew anymore. | 他已经不是我们的团员了 |
[36:19] | We win! We win! | 我们赢了 我们赢了 |
[36:21] | We win, we win, we win! | 我们才是冠军 |
[36:23] | No, again, you are disqualified. | 不 再说一遍 你们出局了 |
[36:28] | And the winner is… | 冠军是… |
[36:30] | Panther Blood! | “血豹” |
[36:32] | And the winner is… | 冠军是… |
[36:34] | Suck Monsters! | “丑丑怪” |
[36:37] | And the winner is… | 冠军是… |
[36:39] | Nobody. | 没有冠军 |
[36:40] | All teams are disqualified due to violence. | 所有舞团都因打架出局了 |
[36:44] | Okay, well, we’re out of rent money. | 我们没钱租彩排场地了 |
[36:47] | So remember that thing I said about no more crime? | 记得我之前说不再犯罪吗 |
[36:51] | That’s over now. Go do crime. | 我收回 还是去做坏事吧 |
[36:54] | Yep, he just confessed to the robbery. | 搞定 他刚承认抢劫了 |
[36:57] | – Damn it! – That was easy. | -该死 -这个笨贼 |
[36:58] | Look, please let me go. | 拜托 放我走吧 |
[37:00] | I only did it to pay rent for my dance crew’s rehearsal space. | 我只是想抢点钱租彩排场地 |
[37:03] | Well then, you’re in luck. | 哎呀 算你走运 |
[37:04] | We only arrest people for robbery if they don’t have a reason. | 我们只逮捕那些无端抢劫的人 |
[37:08] | Sorry it took me so long to bail you out. | 抱歉这么久才保释你出来 |
[37:11] | No, it was my fault. | 没事 是我的错 |
[37:13] | I shouldn’t have used my one phone call to prank the police department. | 我就不该用自己的手机往警察局打骚扰电话 |
[37:17] | Man, a year ago, I almost died, | 一年前 我差点死掉 |
[37:19] | and I’m exactly the same as I was before. A failure. | 一年过去了 我还是老样子 一事无成 |
[37:23] | You’re not a failure. | 你不是一事无成 |
[37:24] | You’re a dreamer. | 你怀揣梦想 |
[37:26] | Look, I like my job at the old folk’s home. | 我很喜欢在敬老院的工作 |
[37:29] | Those old biddies are sweet, | 那些老太太人很好 |
[37:31] | and sometimes they give me what they think are candy | 有时会给我一些”糖果” |
[37:34] | but are really loose Vicodin. | 但其实是她们的止痛药 |
[37:37] | But when I’m with you, | 但我和你在一起时 |
[37:38] | I feel like the sky’s the limit. | 我觉得无拘无束 |
[37:41] | I feel like someday, I’ll be able to buy my own Vicodin. | 我觉得我有天能自己买得起糖果 |
[37:45] | And it’ll never turn out to actually be laxatives. | 是真正的糖果 而不是长得像糖的泻药 |
[37:50] | Thanks, dog, | 谢了 兄弟 |
[37:51] | but if my life ended today, what would my legacy be? | 但如果我今天死了 我能留下什么 |
[37:56] | Sure, I did a wheelie on a dirt bike through an entire Waffle House, | 我确实曾经翘着摩托车前轮横穿松饼屋 |
[38:00] | and I was once interviewed on the news for finding a foot on the beach. | 还因为在沙滩上发现了一只脚上了新闻 |
[38:04] | But yo, other than that, I have no truly great accomplishments. | 但除了这些 我一事无成 |
[38:08] | Bro. | 兄弟 |
[38:10] | I’m only saying this because I love you. | 我是爱你才这么说 |
[38:14] | Do you want a Vicodin right now? | 你想来块糖吗 |
[38:17] | So I walked out of that bar, | 于是我走出了那件酒吧 |
[38:19] | came down to this wharf, threw a rock at a snake, | 来到了这个码头 朝一条蛇扔石子 |
[38:22] | met a guy named Zach Pizazz, | 遇见了一个叫”扎克·皮亚兹”的人 |
[38:24] | talked to him about my crazy year that I’ve had | 跟他讲述我糟心的一年 |
[38:26] | which started when I was locked in a safe. | 故事始于我被锁在保险柜里 |
[38:29] | No, that was me. I’m Zach Pizazz. | 不是 我才是扎克·皮亚兹 |
[38:32] | – We’re caught up now. – Yeah. | -故事讲完了 -对 |
[38:34] | Yeah. | 嗯 |
[38:35] | – A year ago, if you had asked me to run a dance crew in Atlantis – Australia. | -一年前 如果你让我去亚特兰蒂斯组建舞团 -澳大利亚 |
[38:39] | I would have said yes for sure. | 我一定会答应 |
[38:41] | But now, and I know this sounds crazy, | 但现在 我知道听起来很疯狂 |
[38:47] | but I’m starting to think there might be more to life | 我觉得应该去过更有意义的生活 |
[38:49] | than amateur street dancing competitions. | 而不是只参加业余街舞比赛 |
[38:53] | It’s funny, but I know exactly what you mean. | 虽然荒唐 但我理解你的意思 |
[38:57] | My goal in life used to be completely different, too. | 我以前的人生目标也跟现在完全不同 |
[39:01] | I used to, rep this crew called the Demons. | 我曾经是一群恶魔的代表 |
[39:07] | I remember you guys! | 我知道你们 |
[39:09] | Didn’t you all die when someone brought a hammerhead shark into your hot tub? | 你们不是被人放鲨鱼咬死了吗 |
[39:12] | Different Demons. | 被咬死的那是另一群”恶魔” |
[39:14] | The point is, I had to leave my old crew behind, you know? | 重点是 我不得不离开老队员 |
[39:18] | But I met new friends who helped me become a better… person. | 但我遇见了新朋友 他们帮助我变成了更好的人 |
[39:24] | Look, I know this group of people who are also searching for meaning. | 我认识一群同样在找寻人生真谛的人 |
[39:28] | They might be able to help you find what you’re looking for. | 他们也许能帮你达成所愿 |
[39:31] | What do you think? You want to go meet them? | 你意下如何 想去见见他们吗 |
[39:34] | Yeah, that sounds great. | 好 听起来不错 |
[39:37] | Do we have to leave right now? | 现在就得走吗 |
[39:39] | My friend gave me a pill | 我朋友刚给我了一片药 |
[39:40] | that I realized one second ago was definitely a laxative. | 我现在才意识是泻药 |
[39:43] | No, go, go. | 快去解决生理需要吧 |
[39:47] | Well, that is the last time I’ll need to head back down there. | 这是我最后一次去地球 |
[39:50] | So to thank you for your help, | 感谢你的帮忙 |
[39:52] | I brought you back something from Earth. | 我给你从地球带了礼物 |
[39:54] | A little token of my appreciation. | 表达对你的谢意 |
[39:56] | It keeps your antimatter warmer for longer. | 能让你的”反物质”饮料保温更长久 |
[40:06] | – It’s a frog. – Yeah. | -是青蛙耶 -对 |
[40:08] | – There’s a frog on it! – Yeah. | -杯子上有青蛙耶 -没错 |
[40:10] | Right there, it’s a frog! | 杯子上有青蛙耶 |
[40:12] | Man, it’s green. It’s classic. | 天呐 还是绿色的 太经典了 |
[40:14] | This guy’s a jumper. You can tell. | 这个小可爱肯定很能跳 |
[40:16] | – Thank you! – You’re welcome. | -谢谢你 -不客气 |
[40:20] | That really went over big! | 还真是个青蛙控 |
[40:27] | How’s Jason? Is he still cute? | 杰森怎么样 颜值没崩吧 |
[40:28] | – He looks about the same. – That sounds cute. | -还是当年那样 -听得我小鹿乱撞 |
[40:31] | – Hey, guys. – Hey, Judge. | -两位 -法官好 |
[40:33] | – Long time no see. – Yeah. | -好久不见 -是呀 |
[40:35] | – How’s it going? – So good. | -怎么样了 -进展顺利 |
[40:36] | I mean, everything is going according to plan, | 一切按原计划进行 |
[40:38] | and nothing is going differently from the plan. | 没有事情不按计划走 |
[40:41] | Yes, that’s a very not weird way to put it. | 嗯 这么说一点也”不反常”呢 |
[40:44] | I’m just stretching my legs. | 我只是活动活动腿脚 |
[40:46] | Just binged like 300 episodes of “NCIS.” | 刚狂刷了300集《海军罪案调查处》 |
[40:50] | You know, I’m not a human woman, but that Mark Harmon can get it. | 虽然我不是人类 但马克·哈蒙简直把我迷得腿软 |
[40:55] | You know what I’m saying? | 你懂我意思吧 |
[40:57] | Speaking of human cutiepies, how’s that Chidi doing? | 说到人类小可爱 奇迪怎么样了 |
[41:00] | Sorry, Judge. Let me just– | 抱歉 法官 我拿一下… |
[41:01] | – Hey, you know what you would love f you like Mark Harmon? – Yeah? | -既然你喜欢马克·哈蒙 有部电影推荐给你 -说说看 |
[41:05] | “Stealing Home.” | 《重振雄风》 |
[41:05] | He is very sexy in “Stealing Home” | 他在里面超级帅 |
[41:08] | according to the private thoughts of more than 7 million Caucasian women. | 反正七百万白人女性心里都偷偷这么想 |
[41:12] | Hot tip. Thanks, girl. | 好建议 谢了 小姐妹 |
[41:13] | You guys want to come with? | 你们要一起吗 |
[41:15] | We can watch together. | 我们可以一起看 |
[41:16] | I can whip up some nachos. | 我可以做些墨西哥玉米片 |
[41:18] | – I am incapable of eating, so. – Suit yourselves. | -我没有进食功能… -随便你吧 |
[41:21] | Party poopers. party poopers! | 真扫兴 没意思 |
[41:24] | I guess it’ll just be me and Mark, then. | 看来只好我和马克过二人世界了 |
[41:26] | Naughty, naughty. | 哎哟 有人春心荡漾了 |
[41:29] | Boy. | 天呐 |
[41:30] | Michael, we almost just got busted. | 迈克尔 我们刚才差点被抓包 |
[41:33] | Yeah, but we didn’t, and more importantly, | 差点而已 重要的是 |
[41:35] | Jason just arrived in Australia. | 杰森刚到澳大利亚了 |
[41:38] | The four of them are finally together. | 他们四人终于聚齐了 |
[41:40] | we did it, Janet! We got away with it. | 我们成功了 珍妮特 法官也毫无察觉 |
[41:45] | So this is our MRI machine. Don’t–don’t touch that. | 这就是核磁共振机 别碰那里 |
[41:49] | Each of you will get a chance in here eventually. | 大家都有机会体验一把 |
[41:51] | Hopefully, none of you is claustrophobic. | 希望大家都没有幽闭空间恐惧症 |
[41:53] | Clausterphobic? | 圣诞恐惧症 |
[41:55] | Who would ever be scared of Santa Claus? | 哪有人会害怕圣诞老人呀 |
[41:58] | The Jewish. | 犹太人 |
[42:00] | Are you from Florida? | 你是佛罗里达人吗 |
[42:02] | – Jacksonville. – Yeah. | -杰克逊维尔 -我猜也是 |
[42:03] | That should be fine for me. | 我没问题 |
[42:04] | It’s roughly the same size as Nicole Kidman’s cryogenic anti-aging chamber, | 这和妮可·基德曼那个低温防衰老箱差不多大 |
[42:08] | and I’ve never had a problem in there. | 我在里面可从没感到过不适 |
[42:10] | I’ll be okay, too. | 我也不介意 |
[42:11] | Kinda of reminds me of the home tanning booth | 很像我家之前那个日光棚 |
[42:13] | I lost my virginity in. | 我就是在里面破的处 |
[42:15] | I cannot wait to take a look at these three brains. | 我迫不及待扫描他们三个的大脑了 |
[42:18] | Forgot to mention. | 忘了告诉大家 |
[42:19] | There’s one more person who will be joining us. | 还有一个人要加入 |
[42:22] | Seems like a really interesting guy. | 这人挺有意思的 |
[42:24] | He was almost run over by a train a few months ago. | 他几个月前差点被火车压死 |
[42:26] | Heard about the study, emailed me last night. | 听说了这个研究 昨晚给我发了邮件 |
[42:29] | This doesn’t make any sense. | 这讲不通啊 |
[42:33] | They’re all there. What’s going on? | 他们四个已经聚齐了啊 怎么回事 |
[42:37] | – No. – What is it? | -糟了 -怎么了 |
[42:40] | Something bad, Janet. | 出事了 珍妮特 |
[42:42] | Something very dark… and evil. | 恶魔出现了 |
[42:48] | Yes. Come on in. | 快请进 |
[42:49] | – Everyone, this is Trevor. – Hey, guys. | -各位 这位是特雷弗 -大家好 |
[42:52] | It is so great to meet you. | 各位 幸会啊 |