| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:06] | Previously on The West Wing: | |
| [00:07] | I made a deal with Abbey because of my thing. | 因为我的病 我跟艾碧达成了协议 |
| [00:10] | One term. | 一个条件 |
| [00:12] | The energy secretary’s gonna respond… | 能源部长将会做出回应 |
| [00:13] | …and I’d like to mention that to the vice president. | 我想跟副总统提这件事 |
| [00:15] | – Shouldn’t have Bill Trotter do it. – Who would you send? | -比尔特罗特不该那么做的 -你要派谁去？ |
| [00:17] | To punch back? | 你是指反击吗？ |
| [00:19] | – Me. – I’m sure you know I was curious… | -我 -我相信你知道我很好奇 |
| [00:21] | …about why you’d volunteer for something like that. | 你为什么会自愿做那种事 |
| [00:23] | Mr. Vice President, what do you know that I don’t? | 副总统先生 你知道什么我不知道的事吗？ |
| [00:26] | Toby, the total tonnage of what I know that you don’t… | 托比，我知道 而你不知道的那件事 |
| [00:29] | …could stun a team of oxen in its tracks. | 可是会把一堆人给吓破胆 17个人 |
| [00:38] | That’s an incredible one in 500 Americans afflicted with this disease. | 那真的很不可思议 五百分之一的美国人罹患这项疾病 <同一晚> |
| [00:44] | Which leads me to part two of my question. | 那让我的问题分成了两个部份 |
| [00:48] | Senator, how is it that despite the prevalence of this disorder… | 参议员，为什么 即使罹患这项疾病的人不在少数 |
| [00:52] | …autism has received less than 15 percent…? | 自闭症的治疗率 低于百分之十五 <两天后的晚上> <再两天后的晚上> |
| [01:43] | – Leo? – Hey. I didn’t know you were still here. | -里奥 -我不知道你还没有下班 |
| [01:46] | What’s going on? | 发生了什么事？ |
| [01:48] | I’ve been thinking. About why Hoynes volunteered to slap down big oil. | 我一直在想为什么何尼斯 要自愿去对抗大型石油公司 |
| [01:52] | – It was his polling information. – Yeah, but why did he put the poll… | -因为民调结果的关系 -对，但我好奇的是 |
| [01:55] | …in the field at all, is what I’m saying. | 他为什么要做那次民调 |
| [01:57] | John Hoynes is an egomaniac who needs to be told what people think of him. | 约翰何尼斯是个自大狂 他想知道别人对他的看法 |
| [02:02] | That’s pretty unusual for Washington. | 在华盛顿那是很奇怪的 |
| [02:05] | Leo, has there been a discussion in some room, someplace… | 里奥，有任何人在任何地方 |
| [02:10] | …anywhere, on any level, about Hoynes being dropped from the ticket in 2002? | 不论是用何种形式，讨论过让何尼斯 在2002年出局吗？ |
| [02:15] | No. | 没有 |
| [02:17] | You sure? | 你确定？ |
| [02:18] | Because I thought maybe it was… | 因为我想或许它是 |
| [02:20] | – … an Eisenhower-Nixon… – No. I wouldn’t give it a lot of thought. | -艾森豪跟尼克森 -不，我想应该没有 |
| [02:25] | Okay. | 好吧 <隔天晚上> <隔天早上> |
| [03:03] | Hey. | 嘿 |
| [03:06] | – You scared the hell out of me. – The poll Hoynes put in the field… | -你差点没把我吓死 -何尼斯做的民调 |
| [03:09] | He’s gonna run for president one day, why shouldn’t he do his own polling? | 有一天他会竞选总统 他为什么不该自己做民调？ |
| [03:12] | He’s gonna run in six years, what good does last week’s do? | 他在六年内一定会参选 他上星期做的会帮到他什么？ |
| [03:15] | I really don’t know. | 我真的不知道 |
| [03:21] | Okay. | 好吧 <当天晚上> |
| [03:25] | – It’s never happened before, right? – No. | -这是前所未见的事，对吧？ -没错 |
| [03:28] | A vice president would never challenge a sitting president for the nomination. | 从来就没有副总统 跟现任总统角逐提名 |
| [03:31] | – Of course not. – You see his itinerary? | -当然没有 -你看过他的行程表吗？ |
| [03:33] | – Who? – The vice president. | -谁？ -副总统 |
| [03:35] | – I don’t keep tabs on John. – Speech at a semiconductor plant. | -我不负责约翰的事 -在半导体工厂发表演说 |
| [03:38] | The title of the speech is: | 演讲的题目是： |
| [03:40] | ” Clean Air Industry in the High-Tech Corridor of the Industrial Northeast. “ | “东北部工业走廊的 高科技清新空气工业” |
| [03:46] | – Where? – Nashua. New Hampshire. | -在哪里？ -新罕布夏纳许华 |
| [03:55] | Toby, nobody, and particularly not Hoynes, would be naive enough… | 托比，没有人，特别是何尼斯 会天真到 |
| [03:59] | What I mean is, if he’s going to New Hampshire for the reason… | 我的意思是，如果他真的 为了你想的那个理由 |
| [04:02] | …you’re thinking, he would mask it with something. It wouldn’t be an official trip. | 到新罕布夏去，他得找个借口 这不可能是正式行程 |
| [04:07] | He’d make up a benign excuse to be up there. | 他会编个借口到那里去 |
| [04:09] | I know. | 我知道 |
| [04:11] | So why are you concerned about the speech? | 你为什么那么担心那场演说？ |
| [04:13] | Because it comes in the middle of a three-day camping trip to Killington. | 因为这是他到奇林顿 三天访问行程中的一个节目 |
| [04:22] | Why does Hoynes think the president isn’t gonna run again? | 为什么何尼斯认为 总统不会竞选连任？ |
| [04:33] | What’s going on, Leo? | 究竟是什么事？里奥 罗伯洛 杜希尔 艾莉森詹尼 珍妮尔摩隆奈 里察薛福 约翰史宾赛 布雷迪威佛德 马丁辛 西厢 晚上十一点三十五分 |
| [05:41] | Excuse me, Mr. President. | 对不起，总统先生 |
| [05:43] | I closed the embassies in Tanzania and Brussels. | 我关闭了坦尚尼亚 跟布鲁塞尔的大使馆 |
| [05:45] | – What about domestic? – I don’t have to make that call yet. | -在内政部份呢？ -我还不必打电话 |
| [05:49] | – How much time do you have? – About an hour. | -你有多少时间？ -大约一小时 |
| [05:51] | Mr. President, I’ve got Toby waiting in his office right now. | 总统先生 托比在他的办公室等我 |
| [05:54] | – Why? – We’ve gotta tell him. | -为什么？ -我们得告诉他 |
| [05:57] | Tell him what? | 告诉他什么？ 制片：麦可希斯瑞区 |
| [06:02] | We’ve gotta tell him. | 我们得告诉他 制片：劳伦斯欧唐尼尔二世 |
| [06:07] | – What happened? – He got curious… | -发生了什么事？ -他很好奇 |
| [06:08] | …when Hoynes volunteered to step in for Bill Trotter. And then more curious… | 何尼斯自愿负责特罗特法案 让他更好奇的是 |
| [06:13] | …when he found out it was because Hoynes put a poll in the field. | 他发现那是因为 何尼斯做了一项民调 |
| [06:15] | Now he’s camping in… | 现在他要到 |
| [06:17] | …Killington, Vermont, with a stop in New Hampshire and Toby’s not an idiot. | 佛蒙特奇林顿参加活动 在新罕布夏演说，托比不是白痴 |
| [06:21] | – He… – None of them are. | 制片：克里斯汀哈姆斯 -他 -他们都不知道 |
| [06:24] | – He scheduled a trip to New Hampshire? – High-tech corridor of the Northeast. | -他要到新罕布夏？ -东北部的高科技走廊 |
| [06:28] | – Yeah, thanks to who? – What does that matter right now? | -对，这都是谁的功劳？ -那到底有什么重要的？ |
| [06:34] | I think you gotta see this as an opportunity. | 我想你可以把它 当成是一个机会 |
| [06:38] | – To do what? – To gauge reaction. | -什么机会？ -知道大家的反应 |
| [06:40] | You think Toby’s reaction is gonna be the same as the public’s? | 你觉得托比的反应 会跟民众的反应一样？ |
| [06:42] | – I meant the staff. – Which will be? | -我是指幕僚 -他们会有什么反应？ 制片：李维林威尔斯 |
| [06:46] | – I’m sorry, sir? – The staff’s reaction will be what? | -你说什么？长官 -幕僚会有什么反应？ |
| [06:48] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
| [06:50] | Shock. Betrayal. Confusion. | 震惊 编剧：艾伦索金 背叛，迷惑 |
| [06:54] | Concern about our future. | 导演：亚力克葛拉夫斯 担心我们的未来 |
| [06:57] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
| [06:59] | What do I tell him? | 我跟他说什么？ |
| [07:01] | Everything. | 一切 |
| [07:06] | – Go get him. – Yes, sir. | -叫他过来 -是的，长官 |
| [07:19] | Now it starts. | 开始了 |
| [07:27] | – Yes. – Well. | -对 -好吧 |
| [07:29] | – You know what the problem with this is? – Yes. | -你知道它有什么问题吗？ -是的 |
| [07:31] | – It’s supposed to be funny. – And yet? | -它应该很好笑 -所以呢？ |
| [07:33] | – It’s not. – No. | -它不好笑 -没错 |
| [07:34] | – Who worked on this? – Jay Breech. Janet Lippman. | -这是谁写的？ -杰布利奇，珍妮李普曼 |
| [07:37] | – Andy Kyle worked on it a little. – You know what they did? | -安迪凯尔都帮了点忙 -你知道他们做了什么吗？ |
| [07:41] | They forgot to bring the funny. | 他们忘了想些笑点 |
| [07:44] | How much time do we have? | 我们有多少时间？ |
| [07:45] | I wanna to show it to him within the hour. | 我想在一小时内拿给他看 |
| [07:51] | Toby. | 托比 |
| [07:52] | Sam and I are gonna punch up the jokes for the Correspondents’ Dinner. | 山姆跟我要帮 媒体晚宴讲稿想些笑点 |
| [07:55] | – Yeah, I read it. – They forgot the funny. | -对，我看过它了 -他们忘记要放入笑点 |
| [07:57] | – Yeah. – You want to stay? | -对 -你要留下来吗？ |
| [07:58] | – Where you gonna be? – We’ll find a place. | -你们要去哪里？ -我们会找个地方 |
| [08:00] | – I’ll hook up with you in a bit. – What’s going on? | -我待会再去找你们 -发生了什么事？ |
| [08:03] | Nothing. | 没事 |
| [08:06] | Hello. | 哈�� |
| [08:08] | – How you doing? – I’m doing fine. | -你好吗？ -我很好 |
| [08:10] | – Did you get the flowers? – Yes, I did. | -你收到花了吗？ -我收到了 |
| [08:12] | – Did you like them? – They were very pretty. | -你喜欢吗？ -它们非常漂亮 |
| [08:14] | – Know why I sent them? – I know why you think you did. | -你知道为什么我要送你花吗？ -我知道为什么你觉得你知道 |
| [08:16] | – It’s our anniversary. – No, it’s not. | -今天是我们的周年纪念日 -才怪 |
| [08:18] | I’m the sort of guy who remembers those things. | 我是会记得 那种事的男人 |
| [08:20] | No, you send a woman flowers to be mean. | 不，你送女人花 是为了羞辱她 |
| [08:22] | You’re the only person I’ve met who can do that. | 你是我认识的人当中 唯一会这么做的人 |
| [08:24] | – I’m quite something. – Yes. | -我真的很特别 -没错 |
| [08:25] | – I sent them to mark an occasion. – We gonna do this every year? | -我送花给你是为了庆祝纪念日 -我们每年都得这么做吗？ |
| [08:28] | For I am a man of occasion. | 因为我是个重视纪念日的人 |
| [08:30] | I started working for you in February, this is April. You’re an idiot. | 我在二月开始为你工作 现在是四月，你是个白痴 |
| [08:32] | You started working for me once in February, then you stopped for a while. | 你曾经是在二月开始为我工作 但后来你离开了一阵子 |
| [08:35] | Then you started again in April. | 然后你在四月又跑回来上班 |
| [08:37] | That’s the one I celebrate, because it’s the only one where you started… | 我要庆祝的是那个日子 因为自从那一天开始 |
| [08:40] | …and it wasn’t followed by not working but rather going back to your boyfriend. | 你就没有为了跟男朋友复合 而辞掉工作 |
| [08:44] | And how, in comparison to that and him you can call me mean… | 相较于那件事跟他 你会说我要羞辱你 |
| [08:48] | …is simply another in a long series… | 那可是另一个漫长的故事 |
| [08:50] | Oh, shut up. Do you ever get tired of your own voice? | 闭嘴 你难道不讨厌自己的声音吗？ |
| [08:53] | No. No, no, no. | 不 |
| [08:57] | Where are you going now? | 你要去哪里？ |
| [08:59] | Sam and I are gonna punch up the thing for tomorrow. We need funny people. | 山姆跟我要写明天的讲稿 我们需要有幽默感的人 |
| [09:03] | Know any? Right there was a joke. Oldest joke in the book. | 你认识那样的人吗？那是个笑话 最老掉牙的笑话 |
| [09:06] | – I’ll say. – You know what, Ado Annie? | -一点都没错 -你知道吗？艾朵安妮 |
| [09:08] | I sent you flowers. I think what you’re trying to say is: | 我送你花 我想你的意思是： |
| [09:11] | “Why, thank you, Josh. They’re beautiful. How very thoughtful of you. | “喔，谢谢你，乔西，它们很漂亮 你真的是太细心了 |
| [09:14] | Not many bosses would’ve been that thoughtful. “ | 不是每一个老板 都是那么细心的” |
| [09:16] | Really? Because I think what I was trying to say was shove it. | 真的吗？我想我的意思是去你的 |
| [09:18] | – Then I guessed wrong. – Want me to help with the thing? | -那么我猜错了 -你要我帮忙吗？ |
| [09:20] | Yes, I do. Because you are such an hysterically funny person. | 没错，因为你是一个超级爆笑的人 |
| [09:25] | Did you notice how I used “an” there properly? | 你注意到 我刚刚把“一个”念得很标准吗？ |
| [09:27] | – Yes, I did. – You crack me up. | -我注意到了 -我快被你笑死了 |
| [09:29] | You know, there are times when, to put it simply, I hate your breathing guts. | 简单地来说有些时候 我恨死你的无颜了 |
| [09:33] | – So the flowers really did the trick? – Oh, yeah. | -那些花真的感动了你？ -是的 |
| [09:37] | Ainsley? | 艾金丝莉 <艾金丝莉> <白宫顾问助理> |
| [09:43] | Ainsley. | 艾金丝莉 |
| [09:48] | – Ainsley. – Hello, Sam. | -艾金丝莉 -嗨，山姆 |
| [09:49] | – Didn’t you hear me shouting? – Yes. | -你没有听到我在叫你？ -我听到了 |
| [09:51] | – And? – I chose to ignore it. | -所以呢？ -我选择不理会你 |
| [09:52] | – Because? – You were shouting. | -为什么？ -你在大叫 |
| [09:54] | – You’re adorable. – Yet ill-adored. | -你真的很可爱 -但你恨死我了 |
| [09:55] | – Go figure. What are you doing? – I’m going up to Smith College tomorrow. | -没错，你在做什么？ -明天我要到史密斯学院 |
| [09:59] | – Why? – It’s my alma mater. | -为什么？ -它是我的母校 |
| [10:01] | – Reunion? – No, the women’s studies department… | -同学会？ -不，女性研究系 |
| [10:03] | …is having a panel on resurrecting the ERA. | 要举行一个座谈会 重新讨论权利平等修正案 |
| [10:05] | – Who else is on the panel? – Rebecca Walker, Gloria Steinem… | -参加座谈会的人还有谁？ -萝贝卡渥克，葛萝丽雅史坦能 |
| [10:08] | …Ann Coulter, Naomi Wolf. | 安柯特，纳欧蜜沃夫 |
| [10:10] | You know, something like 40% of all women oppose the ERA and in my life… | 有人说四成的女人反对 权利平等修正案，我这辈子 |
| [10:14] | – … I’ve never met one of them. – Ainsley Hayes. Nice to meet you. | -从来没有认识过那样的人 -艾金丝莉海耶斯，很高兴认识你 |
| [10:18] | – You’re not. – Yes. | -你才不是 -我就是 |
| [10:20] | – You’re not. – Yes. | -你才不是 -我就是 |
| [10:22] | You’re not, you’re not, you’re not one of those people. | 你不是，你不会是那样的人 |
| [10:26] | If by “those people” you’re referring to Episcopalians… | 如果你指的“那些人” 是圣公会教徒 |
| [10:29] | You’re going to the cradle of feminism to argue in opposition of the ERA? | 你要到女性主义的发源地 抗议反对权利平等修正案？ |
| [10:33] | – And get some decent pizza, yeah. – They’re gonna hate you. | -还要吃些好吃的披萨 -他们会恨你 |
| [10:36] | I’m a straight Republican from North Carolina. | 我是来自北卡罗莱纳州的 忠诚共和党员 |
| [10:38] | You don’t think they hated me the first time around? | 你不觉得 他们从一开始就恨我吗？ |
| [10:41] | What are you doing? | 你在做什么？ |
| [10:42] | I wanna punch up the jokes for the Correspondents’ Dinner… | 我要为媒体晚宴讲稿想些笑点 |
| [10:45] | …and I’m looking for people left in the building who are funny. | 我想找些有幽默感的人 |
| [10:47] | I can’t find any so I came to you. | 我找不到那样的人，所以我来找你 |
| [10:50] | I would think with your infectious sense of humor, you would have no trouble. | 我想因为你有变态的幽默感 所以你应该想得出笑点 |
| [10:53] | – You wanna help me or not? – I need to do this. | -你要不要帮我？ -我得把这个弄完 |
| [10:56] | – We’ve ordered Chinese food. – Okay. | -我们叫了中国菜 -好吧 |
| [11:00] | …and Australia announced today they’re holding the 18th Annual Nude Olympics. | 今天澳洲宣布 他们要举办第十八届裸体奥运 |
| [11:04] | The Nude Olympics in Australia. | 裸体奥运在澳洲 |
| [11:06] | You thought it was exciting to win a race by a nose. Oh, you gotta watch this. | 你认为以些许差距获胜很刺耳 你得看看这个 |
| [11:16] | Did you see the draft for the Correspondents’ Dinner? | 你看过媒体晚宴 的演讲草稿了吗？ |
| [11:20] | It’s not funny. | 它一点都不好笑 |
| [11:23] | Sam’s gonna work on it. | 山姆会想出办法的 |
| [11:37] | Toby, take it easy in there, okay? | 托比，在里面放轻松一点，好吗？ |
| [11:45] | You can go in. | 你可以进去了 |
| [11:49] | – Good evening, Mr. President. – You want a drink? | -晚安，总统先生 -你要喝一杯吗？ |
| [11:51] | – No, thank you, sir, I’m fine. – Have a drink with me. | -不，谢谢你，我不想喝 -跟我喝一杯吧 |
| [11:54] | – Sure. – Bourbon, no ice. | -好吧 -不加冰的波本酒 |
| [11:56] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [11:58] | You know what I found out recently? | 你知道最近我发现了什么吗？ |
| [12:00] | To be called ” bourbon, ” it has to come from Kentucky. Otherwise it’s sour mash. | 真正的“波本酒”来自卡塔基州 其他地方的叫酸麦芽酒 |
| [12:04] | An Algerian-born terrorist named Reda Nessam was arrested… | 一位阿尔及利亚籍 名叫雷达纳森的恐怖份子 |
| [12:08] | …at the Canadian border yesterday with a U-Haul containing 10 two-ounce jars… | 昨天在加拿大边境被捕 他的拖车里有十个两盎司的罐子 |
| [12:12] | …filled with nitroglycerin. | 里面装满了硝酸甘油 |
| [12:14] | And they don’t allow that at Yosemite? | 优胜美地当局不允许这样吗？ |
| [12:16] | No. Anyway, on advice from State and Intelligence… | 不，根据国务院 跟中情局的建议 |
| [12:20] | …I closed the embassies in Tanzania and Brussels. | 我关闭了坦尚尼亚 跟布鲁塞尔的大使馆 |
| [12:23] | What about the FAA? | 联邦航空总署呢？ |
| [12:24] | They want me to order the airports to heighten security… | 他们要我下命 机场提高警戒 |
| [12:28] | …but it’s a holiday weekend. I don’t know. | 但这是连假周末 我不知道 |
| [12:31] | – Toby, I gotta tell you something. – Does the FAA have to present… | -托比，我得告诉你一件事 -联邦航空总署能提出证据 |
| [12:34] | …evidence of a credible threat? | 证明真的有恐怖威胁吗？ |
| [12:36] | – How do they do that? – I don’t know, they do it. | -他们怎么能那么做？ -我不知道，但他们做到了 |
| [12:39] | – Excuse me, sir, is there a time frame? – About an hour. | -对不起，这有时间限制吗？ -还有一个小时 |
| [12:42] | Toby, around 10 years ago, for a period of a few months… | 托比，大概在十年前 有几个月 |
| [12:45] | …I was feeling rundown, and I had a pain in my leg. | 我觉得疲倦 腿感到疼痛 |
| [12:48] | They both eventually subsided. But then eight years ago the pain came back. | 最后这些症状都消失了 但八年前我又感到疼痛 |
| [12:53] | As well as numbness. My vision would be blurry sometimes and I’d get dizzy. | 同时我还有麻木感 有时候我的视力模糊，我觉得头晕 |
| [12:59] | During an eye exam, the doctor detected abnormal pupil responses… | 做过眼睛检查后 医生发现我的瞳孔反应异常 |
| [13:03] | …and ordered an MRI. | 于是帮我安排做核磁共振扫描 |
| [13:05] | The radiologist found plaque on my brain and spine. | 放射科医生在我脑部及脊椎 发现了溶菌斑 |
| [13:09] | I have a relapsing-remitting course of MS. | 我罹患了 复发型多发性硬化症 |
| [13:20] | I’m sorry, sir? | 你说什么？ |
| [13:25] | I have multiple sclerosis, Toby. | 我得了多发性硬化症，托比 |
| [13:58] | – What does ” relapsing-remitting ” mean? – I’m sorry? | -“复发型”是什么意思？ -你说什么？ |
| [14:01] | What does ” relapsing-remitting ” mean? | “复发型”是什么意思？ |
| [14:03] | It’s… I don’t know… It’s the good kind of MS. | 它我不知道 它是良性的多发性硬化症 |
| [14:07] | – It’s the good kind. – As opposed to secondary progressive. | -它是良性的 -跟后续恶化型不同 |
| [14:11] | Which is the bad kind. | 它是恶性的 |
| [14:12] | MS is a chronic disease of the central nervous system. | 多发性硬化症是 中央神经系统的慢性疾病 |
| [14:16] | Symptoms can be as mild as numbness or as severe as paralysis. | 症状可以很温和，像是麻木 但严重时会瘫喝 |
| [14:20] | And loss of vision. | 还有丧失视力 |
| [14:25] | Cognitive function. | 认知能力退化 |
| [14:27] | – Is it…? I’m sorry, is it fatal? – No. That’s the good news. | -它抱歉，它会致命吗？ -不，那是个好消息 |
| [14:33] | – Bad news is there’s no cure. – Yeah, that I knew. | -坏消息是它无药可医 -对，我知道 |
| [14:41] | – Does relapsing…? – Ever turn into secondary progressive? | -复发型 -会变成后续恶化型吗？ |
| [14:45] | Sure. | 当然会 有任何方法 能预知它会不会恶化吗？ |
| [14:46] | Is there any way of telling if it’s going to? | 有任何方法 能预知它会不会恶化吗？ |
| [14:48] | No. | 没有 |
| [14:56] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [15:01] | I’d like to stand up. Can I stand? | 我想站起来，可以吗？ |
| [15:14] | I’m sorry, sir…. | 抱歉，长官 |
| [15:18] | I need to… | 我需要 |
| [15:20] | Can I…? Excuse me. | 我是否可以抱歉 |
| [15:30] | Mr. President? | 总统先生 |
| [15:32] | You wanted the call from Mr. Garreth at the FAA. | 我已经帮你跟联邦航空总署的 盖瑞斯先生连络上了 |
| [15:35] | – Could you put it through to my office? – Yes, sir. | -麻烦你把电话接到我的办公室 -是的 |
| [15:41] | Go take it in my office. | 到我办公室接电话 |
| [15:53] | See? | 你看到了吗？ |
| [15:54] | – Larry? See the problem? – Well, they didn’t bring the funny, Josh. | -赖瑞，你知道问题在哪里吗？ -他们没有带进笑点，乔西 |
| [15:57] | No, they didn’t. What are you doing? | 没错，你说的对，你在做什么？ |
| [15:58] | Jotting down go-tos in case a joke doesn’t work. | 记下我的一些想法 免得笑话不好笑 |
| [16:01] | ” I haven’t seen an audience this dead since, ” that kind of thing. | “我没有看过 这么安静的观众”等等 |
| [16:03] | – The president’s gonna get heckled? – No, but I’ve read the speech… | -总统会被质问？ -不，但我念过这篇稿子 |
| [16:06] | …and I think you’d be wise to have some dead-audience metaphors. | 我想你应该好好利用 安静的观众这一点 |
| [16:08] | Here we go. | 开始了 |
| [16:10] | ” Ladies and gentlemen, I’m very happy to be here and I want to thank… | “各位先生女士 我很高兴来到这里，我要谢谢 |
| [16:13] | …the White House Correspondents’ Association for inviting me. | 白宫记者协会邀请我来 |
| [16:16] | I expect I’ll be stuck here tonight with my fair share of verbal harpoons. | 我期待今天也能在这里 展露我的伶牙俐齿 |
| [16:19] | I don’t mind, just don’t stick me with the dinner check. “ | 我不介意，今晚别叫我买单” |
| [16:25] | And then it says “allow for laughter. “ | 下面写着： “可以笑了” |
| [16:27] | Unless we tell the audience, it won’t be a problem. | 只要不告诉观众 那应该不会是问题 |
| [16:30] | – Hey. – ” Don’t stick me with the dinner check”? | -嘿 -“今晚别叫我买单”？ |
| [16:33] | I know, it’s like he’s playing Grossingers. | 我知道，那像是他在学葛辛杰斯 |
| [16:35] | ” I know some of you are troubled by my frequent use of Latin references. | “我知道你们之中有些人 不喜欢我常常引述拉丁文 |
| [16:38] | All I can say is, no te preocupes. “ | 我只能说别担心” |
| [16:40] | – The joke is that it’s in Spanish. – It’s that kind of Latin. | -笑点在于那是西班牙文 -它有点像是拉丁文 |
| [16:43] | That’s where you’ll want your first dead-audience joke. | 那就是你希望让观众 笑不出来的第一个笑话 |
| [16:45] | We’re not gonna need one. | 我们不需要那样的笑话 |
| [16:46] | Donna, who gave you those beautiful flowers? | 唐娜，谁送你那么漂亮的花？ |
| [16:48] | – I did. Those are from me. – What’s the occasion? | -那是我送的 -为什么？ |
| [16:50] | – Nothing. – Our anniversary. | -没事 -庆祝我们的周年纪念日 |
| [16:52] | – Our not anniversary. – Donna doesn’t like to talk about it. | -今天才不是我们的周年纪念日 -她不想谈这件事 |
| [16:54] | – I really don’t. – Okay. | -我真的不想 -好吧 |
| [16:55] | A few years ago Donna’s boyfriend broke up with her… | 几年前 唐娜的男友跟她分手 |
| [16:58] | …so she started working for Josh… | 所以她开始为乔西工作 |
| [17:00] | …then the boyfriend told her to come back, she did, then they broke up… | 然后她男友来求她复合，她答应了 后来他们又分手 |
| [17:03] | …and she came back to work. | 她又跑回来工作 |
| [17:05] | I thought you meant you didn’t want to talk about it. | 我以为你说 你不想谈这件事 |
| [17:07] | – I’m a spokesman. It’s in my blood. – They’re nice flowers. | -我是发言人，这是我的天性 -那些花很漂亮 |
| [17:09] | “And I’d also like to thank our host, Bill Maher. “ | “我还要谢谢今天的主人 比尔马赫” |
| [17:12] | – We’re not making fun of the host. – Who are we making fun of? | -我们不能开主人玩笑 -那要开谁玩笑？ |
| [17:14] | – Republicans. | – Republicans. -共和党 -共和党 |
| [17:15] | I only wish the Speaker were here tonight… | 我很遗憾今晚 议长没办法到这里来 |
| [17:17] | …but he’s held up in negotiations on the Hill. | 他忙着在国会山庄进行协商 |
| [17:20] | He’s demanding his latest prenup include a line-item veto. | 他要求他最新的婚前协议书 包括单一否决权 |
| [17:23] | – There it is. – All right, two groups. | -就是这个 -好吧，大家分成两边 |
| [17:25] | – You guys there, we stay here. – I wanna be in the other group. | -你们在那边，我们在这边 -我想在另一边 |
| [17:27] | – Why? – The Kung Pao chicken. | -为什么？ -宫保鸡丁 |
| [17:29] | Get the Kung Pao chicken and come back here. Let’s go. | 去拿宫保鸡丁，然后回这里来 来吧 |
| [17:50] | So I found out about a year ago. | 我是在一年前发现的 |
| [17:54] | Two nights before the State of the Union… | 在发表国情咨文 前两天晚上 |
| [17:58] | …he had an attack. | 他的病复发 |
| [18:02] | He did? | 真的吗？ |
| [18:04] | When he passed out in the Oval Office. | 当时他在椭圆形办公室昏了过去 |
| [18:08] | That was an attack? | 因为他的病发作了？ |
| [18:14] | I thought it was the flu. | 我以为他感冒了 |
| [18:18] | It wasn’t. | 结果不是的 |
| [18:30] | How is it poss…? | 这怎么 |
| [18:32] | How is it possible that this was kept a secret? First of all, who else knows? | 这怎么可能一直没有人知道？ 首先，还有谁知道这件事？ |
| [18:38] | – You’re the 16th person. – Who else? | -你是第十六个人 -还有谁？ |
| [18:41] | I’ll tell you some of them, I won’t tell you all of them. | 我会告诉你哪些人知情 但我不会把全部人名都说出来 |
| [18:44] | Why not? | 为什么？ |
| [18:46] | Because it’s not entirely my business. I’m not sure of my footing here. | 因为这不完全是我的事 我不确定我的立场 |
| [18:50] | The president will be off the phone in a minute and in the meantime… | 总统很快就会讲完电话 同时 |
| [18:53] | – … you’ll take what I give you. – It’s not entirely your business? | -你得听我说 -这不完全是你的事？ |
| [18:57] | The first lady. The doctor, radiologist, the specialist, the kids. | 第一夫人，医生，放射科医生 专科医生，孩子们 |
| [19:03] | – Who else? – That’s it for now. | -还有谁知道？ -就这样 |
| [19:05] | He took a physical. Those doctors were from eight years… | 他做过体检 那些医生八年前 |
| [19:08] | – He took a physical… – It’s in remission. | -他做过体检 -他的病情减轻 |
| [19:10] | It doesn’t show up during a physical. It’s in remission, nobody lied. | 体检时医生没有发现这件事 他的病情减轻，没有人说谎 |
| [19:14] | – Nobody lied? – Nobody. | -没有人说谎？ -没错 |
| [19:16] | Nobody lied? | 没有人说谎？ |
| [19:17] | Is that what you’ve been saying to yourself over and over for a year? | 一年来 你就是这样跟自己说的吗？ |
| [19:20] | Leo, a deception of massive proportion… I can’t even… | 里奥，这是大规模的 欺骗行为我甚至无法 |
| [19:24] | He gets a physical twice a year at Bethesda. His doctors are Naval officers. | 他每年得在贝塞斯达做两次体检 他的医生是海军军官 |
| [19:28] | Are you telling me officers are involved in this? | 你要告诉我 军官涉及这件事吗？ |
| [19:30] | – These guys will be court-martialed. – Nobody… Listen to me. | -那些家伙会被军法审判 -没有人听我说 |
| [19:34] | Nobody lied. | 没有人说谎 |
| [19:37] | Nobody was asked to lie. | 没有人被要求说谎 |
| [19:39] | – Coercion. – Nobody was asked to lie. | -这是高压统治 -没有人被要求说谎 |
| [19:42] | Officers, the first lady, surgeons. Surgeon generals, for all I know. | 军官，第一夫人，医生 卫生部长们，就我所知就是这样了 |
| [19:47] | The plural of “surgeon general ” isn’t surgeon generals… | 你不该说 “卫生部长们” |
| [19:50] | …it’s surgeons general. Like attorneys general or courts-martial. | 应该是卫生署长们 像是检察长或军法庭长 |
| [19:56] | Nobody was asked to lie. | 没有人被要求说谎 |
| [19:58] | That was Garreth from the FAA. | 联邦航空总署的盖瑞斯在线上 |
| [20:01] | Upon interrogating Reda Nessam, they believe it’s possible… | 跟雷达纳森沟通后 他们相信 |
| [20:05] | …that another rental car crossed the border yesterday. | 昨天可能有另一辆 租来的车子越过了边界 |
| [20:08] | They believe it’s headed to a safe house in Paterson, New Jersey… | 他们相信它前往 位于新泽西州派特森的避难处 |
| [20:11] | …and the FBI thinks they can apprehend him in 24 hours. | 联邦调查局认为 他们能在二十四小时内逮捕他 |
| [20:14] | Of course, the only way all of this will happen… | 当然 这一切都不可能发生 |
| [20:17] | …is if Reda Nessam is telling the truth, so who wants odds? | 除非雷达纳森说的是实话 谁想冒这个险？ |
| [20:21] | They’re still looking at forensic evidence and we’re gonna talk again… | 他们还在找法医证据 几分钟后 |
| [20:25] | …in a few minutes to decide if there’s a credible threat. | 我们会再谈一下 决定这到底是不是恐怖威胁 |
| [20:34] | I’m sorry, sir, I didn’t hear that. | 抱歉，长官 我没有听到 |
| [20:36] | I said, we’re gonna decide if there’s a credible threat. | 我说我们要决定 这到底是不是恐怖威胁 |
| [20:40] | Why? What are you guys talking about? | 为什么？你们到底在说什么？ |
| [20:54] | Hey. | 嘿 |
| [20:55] | – How you doing? – Have any idea… | -你好吗？ -你知道 |
| [20:57] | – … how much longer Toby’s gonna be? – I don’t. | -托比还要多久吗？ -我不知道 |
| [21:01] | Let me ask you. You think this joke’s funny? | 我想问你 你觉得这个笑话好笑吗？ |
| [21:03] | ” I’m sorry the Speaker isn’t here, he’s up on the Hill in last-minute negotiations. | “很遗憾议长不在这里 他在国会山庄做最后的沟通 |
| [21:07] | He’s going over his prenup and he wants a line-item veto. “ | 他正在看他的婚前协议书 他希望能有单一否决权” |
| [21:11] | – Well, I think it’s pretty funny, but… – What? | -我觉得很好笑，但是 -什么？ |
| [21:13] | – I wouldn’t do it. – Why? | -我不会那么说 -为什么？ |
| [21:15] | I think it’s gonna call attention to the first lady not being there. | 我想那会让大家注意到 第一夫人不在场 |
| [21:18] | – Where’s Mrs. Bartlet gonna be? – She went back up to Manchester. | -巴特勒太太会在哪里？ -她回曼彻斯特了 |
| [21:21] | She’s not coming to the Correspondents’ Dinner? | 她不参加媒体晚宴？ |
| [21:23] | Probably not. | 或许不会 |
| [21:26] | Charlie, what’s going on? | 查理，发生了什么事？ |
| [21:31] | Sorry. | 抱歉 |
| [21:34] | All right. You don’t know when Toby’s out? | 好吧 你不知道托比什么时候会出来？ |
| [21:38] | No. | 不 |
| [21:44] | All right, here we go! | 好吧，我们开始了 |
| [21:45] | ” Equality of rights under the law shall not be denied or abridged… | “法律保障权利平等 不该因为性别的不同 |
| [21:51] | …by the United States or any state on account of sex. “ | 在美国或任何一州 遭到否认或剥夺” |
| [21:56] | – What’s the joke? – It’s not a joke. | -笑点在哪里？ -这不是笑话 |
| [21:58] | – It’s the Equal Rights Amendment. – When did that come back? | -这是权利平等修正案 -什么时候我们又扯上这件事了？ |
| [22:00] | – Read what these guys have. – “Shall not be abridged or denied… | -看看这些家伙写的稿子 -“因为性别的不同 |
| [22:03] | …on account of sex. “ | 遭到否认或剥夺” |
| [22:05] | Very dangerous language. This must be stopped. | 这样的措词非常危险 我们不该这么做 |
| [22:08] | What could possibly be your problem with the ERA? | 你对权利平等修正案 到底有什么问题？ |
| [22:10] | – It’s redundant. – Why are we talking about the ERA? | -它是重复的 -我们为什么要谈权利平等修正案？ |
| [22:13] | She’s doing a thing. | 她说的对 |
| [22:14] | But it’s not back or anything, is it? | 但这不是老调重弹吗？ |
| [22:16] | Certainly not if Phyllis Schlafly over here has her way. | 当然不是 除非菲丽丝辛拉菲在场阐述她的理论 |
| [22:18] | – Look. – It’s redundant? | -听着 -它是重复的？ |
| [22:20] | I’m a low-maintenance lady. I got the 14th Amendment, I’m fine. | 我是个自给自足的女性，我得到 第十四号修正案的保护，我没有问题 |
| [22:23] | – How about…? – The 14th Amendment, which says… | -我们何不 -第十四号修正案说 |
| [22:26] | …that a citizen of the United States is anyone that’s born here, that’s me… | 美国公民的定义是 任何在美国出生的人，我就是 |
| [22:29] | …and that no citizen can be denied due process. I’m covered. | 任何一位公民都不该 被剥夺权利，我也包括在内 |
| [22:33] | Make a law for somebody else. | 为其他人制定法律吧 |
| [22:34] | Here’s a joke based on the premise that the party afterward… | 这个笑话的笑点 在于要参加这个派对 |
| [22:37] | …is hard to get into and that the president is the commander in chief. | 真的很难 总统是三军统帅 |
| [22:41] | ” I hear the Bloomberg party’s gonna be hard to get into this year. | “我听说今年要参加 布鲁明伯格的派对真的很难 |
| [22:44] | But I’m not worried. I’m going to the party with the 82nd Airborne. “ | 但我不担心，我要跟 第八十二空降师参加派对” |
| [22:48] | Then says, ” I haven’t heard a room this quiet since we lost the signal on Galileo. “ | 然后是“自从失去伽利略号的讯号后 我没有看过这么安静的观众” |
| [22:52] | Or, ” I haven’t seen my staff update their résumés this quickly… | 或是“我从来没看过我的幕僚 这么快地更新好他们的履历表 |
| [22:56] | …since the last time I tanked at the Correspondents’ Dinner! “ | 自从我上次在媒体晚宴喝醉了之后” |
| [23:00] | When you yell, you make it harder for people to find the funny. | 当你大叫时 大家就会觉得不好笑 |
| [23:02] | – Hey, who gave you those flowers? – A mean man who can’t read a calendar. | -谁送你花？ -一个看不懂日历的残忍男人 |
| [23:05] | Sam. | 山姆 |
| [23:11] | We’re doing fine. Toby’s gonna come in and nail it. This is his thing. | 一切都很顺利，托比会来做检查 这是他的工作 |
| [23:14] | Yeah. Cut the Speaker joke, okay? Mrs. Bartlet might not be there. | 对，别开议长的玩笑，好吗？ 巴特勒太太不会出席 |
| [23:18] | – Okay. – All right, so we’re gonna be fine here. | -好吧 -好了，我们一定会把稿子写完的 |
| [23:22] | Yeah, we’re doing great. We’re doing great, everybody, right? | 对，我们表现的很好 大伙们，我们表现的很好吧？ |
| [23:25] | Sam, we’ve got one here, but it involves a John Wayne impersonation… | 山姆，我们想到一个笑话 但它需要模仿约翰韦恩 |
| [23:28] | – … and a sock puppet. – Yeah. We’re eating it. | -跟一个袜子布偶 -好吧，我们接受 |
| [23:31] | Leo said you had an attack last year. | 里奥说你去年发病过 |
| [23:35] | Leo said you had an attack last year. | 里奥说你去年发病过 |
| [23:40] | Couple of nights before the State of the Union. | 就在发表国情咨文 前两天晚上 |
| [23:43] | Wasn’t that also the night you saw satellite pictures… | 那天晚上你不是看了 印度军队挺进喀什米尔的 |
| [23:46] | …of India moving on Kashmir? | 卫星照片吗？ |
| [23:48] | India and Pakistan… | 印度跟巴基斯坦 |
| [23:50] | …were staring each other down, control of some nuclear weapons… | 彼此监视 他们握有核子武器 |
| [23:53] | …had been put into field. | 也做过试爆 |
| [23:55] | So in the middle of a… I don’t know what you call it. | 所以在最 我不知道你会怎么说 |
| [23:58] | An episode. | 最紧急的时候 |
| [24:00] | You were in the Situation Room as commander in chief. | 你以三军统帅的身份 坐在战情室 |
| [24:03] | I know. I can’t believe we’re all still here. | 我知道 我不敢相信我们都还在这里 |
| [24:08] | – Mr. President… – The episode was over. | -总统先生 -紧急状况结束了 |
| [24:10] | Leo was with me, the chairman of the Joint Chiefs was with me… | 当时里奥跟我在一起 参谋首长联席会议主席跟我在一起 |
| [24:13] | …as were the secretaries of State and Defense. | 国防部长也跟我在一起 |
| [24:16] | – Do you receive medication? – I’m sorry? | -你有在服用药物吗？ -你说什么？ |
| [24:19] | – Do you receive medication? – I get injections of Betaseron. | -你有在服用药物吗？ -我在注射贝它干扰素 |
| [24:25] | From whom? | 谁帮你开的药？ |
| [24:27] | From a doctor. | 一个医生 |
| [24:31] | None of your current doctors are aware of your condition. | 你现在的医生 都不知道你的状况 |
| [24:35] | Mr. President… | 总统先生 |
| [24:38] | …is your wife medicating you? | 你太太在帮你开药吗？ |
| [24:42] | I think it would be best while temperatures are running a little high… | 我想因为气氛有点僵 |
| [24:46] | …that you refer to my wife as Mrs. Bartlet or the first lady. | 你最好叫我太太 巴特勒太太或第一夫人 |
| [24:51] | – Yes, sir. – What do you got, Leo? | -是的，长官 -情况如何？里奥 |
| [24:53] | – They’d like a few more minutes. – The FAA? | -他们还需要一些时间 -联邦航空总署呢？ |
| [24:58] | Talk me through what ” heightened security” means. | 告诉我 提高警戒是什么意思 |
| [25:01] | Well, they deploy more uniformed police and the dogs… | 他们会派出 更多制服警员跟警犬 |
| [25:04] | …they hand search luggage. | 将行李一个个打开来检查 |
| [25:06] | – And they discontinue…. – Curbside check-in, yeah. | -他们取消 -简易登机手续 |
| [25:08] | Eliminate the first two rows of short-term parking. | 临时停车区 前两排都不准停车 |
| [25:12] | Okay. They want a few minutes? | 好吧，他们还得再研究一下？ |
| [25:14] | Toby’s concerned that the peaceful solution I brokered in Kashmir last year… | 托比担心去年我提出的 喀什米尔和平方案 |
| [25:18] | …was the result of a drug-induced haze. | 是因为我吃药吃昏了头 |
| [25:21] | I was there with him. So was Fitz. So was Cashman, Hutchinson, Berryhill… | 当时我跟他在一起，费兹也在 凯许曼，何奇森，贝利希尔都在 |
| [25:26] | – Well, that’s fantastic. – Toby. | -那真的是太棒了 -托比 |
| [25:27] | – None of you were elected! – I was elected, they were appointed. | -你们都不是人民选出来的 -我是人民选出来的，我任命了他们 |
| [25:30] | Vice president was elected. He has the constitutional authority… | 副总统也是人民选出来的 他在宪法上有权利 |
| [25:34] | – … to assume my… – He didn’t last May… | -代替我 -去年五月他没有那么做 |
| [25:36] | …when you were under general anesthesia. | 当时你接受了全身麻醉 |
| [25:38] | That’s because I never signed the letter. I don’t think I got shot because I got MS. | 那是因为我没有签署文件 我不是因为得了多发性硬化症而中弹的 |
| [25:42] | No, I don’t think you did either, sir. I meant that during a night of extreme… | 不，我也那么认为，长官 我是说在那个 |
| [25:45] | …chaos and fear when we didn’t yet know if we’d been the victims… | 充满极端恐惧跟混乱的夜晚 当时我们不知道这是 |
| [25:51] | …of domestic or foreign terrorism, or even an act of war… | 国内或国外的恐怖份子所为 或是战争行为 |
| [25:54] | …there was uncertainty as to who was giving the national security orders… | 我们不知道该由谁 来负责国家安全 |
| [25:57] | …and it was because you never signed a letter. | 只因为你没有签署文件 |
| [26:01] | So I’m led to wonder, given your condition and its lack of predictability… | 所以我想考虑到你的状况 加上它的难以预测性 |
| [26:05] | …why there isn’t simply a signed letter sitting in a file someplace. | 你为什么不签好文件 把它放在档案里 |
| [26:10] | And the answer, of course, is that… | 当然，答案是 |
| [26:11] | …if there was a signed letter sitting in a file someplace… | 如果事先签好文件 把它放在档案里 |
| [26:15] | …somebody would ask why. | 有人会问为什么 |
| [26:17] | The commander in chief had just been attacked… | 三军统帅 遭到暗杀攻击 |
| [26:20] | …he was under a general anesthetic… | 他做了全身麻醉 |
| [26:23] | …a fugitive was at large, the manhunt included every federal… | 嫌犯在逃，参与缉捕行动的单位 包括联邦 |
| [26:27] | …state and local law enforcement agency. | 州政府跟当地的执法机关 |
| [26:29] | The Virginia, Maryland, New Jersey, Pennsylvania and Delaware… | 维吉尼亚州，马里兰州，新泽西州 宾州跟德拉瓦州 |
| [26:33] | …National Guard units were federalized. | 国民兵都接受联邦政府征召 |
| [26:35] | The KH-1 Os showed Republican Guard movement in southern Iraq. | KH-10卫星显示 共和卫队在伊拉克南部有所行动 |
| [26:40] | And 12 hours earlier an F-117 was shot down in the no-fly… | 十二个小时前，一架F-117 在禁航区被击落 |
| [26:44] | …and the vice president’s authority was murky at best. | 副总统的职权却浑沌不清 |
| [26:48] | The national security advisor and the secretary of state… | 国家安全顾问跟国务�搿K |
| [26:53] | …didn’t know who they were taking their orders from. | 不知道他们要听谁的命令 |
| [26:57] | I wasn’t in the Situation Room that night, but I’ll bet all the money in my pockets… | 那晚我不在战情室里 但我愿意拿我所有的钱来下注 |
| [27:02] | …against all the money in your pockets that it was Leo. | 跟你赌你所有的财产 发号施令的人是里奥 |
| [27:06] | Who no one elected! | 他不是人民选出来的人 |
| [27:11] | For 90 minutes that night there was a coup d’état in this country. | 那晚有九十分钟 这个国家发生了军事政变 |
| [27:25] | And the walls came tumbling down. | 天地为之变色 |
| [27:28] | I feel fine, by the way, thanks for asking. | 还有一件事，我很好 谢谢你的关心 |
| [27:30] | – Sir… – No, Leo. | -长官 -不，里奥 |
| [27:32] | Toby’s concern for my health is moving me in ways… | 托比担心我的健康 会让我在很多事上 |
| [27:34] | – Mr. President… – Shut up! | -总统先生 -闭嘴 |
| [27:48] | You know, your indignation would be a lot more interesting to me… | 我对你的愤怒 非常有兴趣 |
| [27:51] | – … if it weren’t quite so covered in crap. – Sir. | -但我不相信你的胡言乱语 -长官 |
| [27:54] | Mr. Garreth. | 盖瑞斯先生 |
| [27:56] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [27:57] | Are you pissed because I didn’t say anything or are you pissed… | 你很生气是因为 我什么都没说或是 |
| [28:00] | …because there were 15 people who knew before you did? | 因为有十五个人比你先知道？ |
| [28:04] | I feel fine, by the way, thanks for asking. | 还有一件事，我很好 谢谢你的关心 |
| [28:19] | Take the call in here. | 在这里接电话 |
| [28:22] | We’ll step outside for a minute. | 我们会到外面等 |
| [28:45] | Yeah, this is the president. | 是的，我是总统 |
| [28:49] | – Self-deprecation. – Yes. | -自我贬低 |
| [28:51] | – Self-deprecation is what we need. – Yes. | -对 |
| [28:54] | Self-deprecation is the appetizer of charm. | -我们需要自我贬低 |
| [28:56] | – We need jokes about the staff. – Yes. | -对 自我贬低也是一种魅力 |
| [28:58] | Let’s start with you. | -我们得开幕僚玩笑 -对 |
| [29:00] | Problem is, there aren’t many jokes you can make about me. | 从你开始吧 |
| [29:02] | How about this: ” Knock, knock. Who’s there? Sam and his prostitute friend. “ | 我可以让你开玩笑的事不多 这个怎么样？“扣，扣，是谁啊？ |
| [29:07] | See, I think that was a bit of misdirected anger. | 是山姆跟他的妓女朋友” 我想那是被误导的愤怒 |
| [29:09] | – I’m okay with that. – Well, in that case. | -我可以接受 -鬼才相信 |
| [29:11] | “Ainsley, you know why I got you flowers in April instead of February? | “艾金丝莉，你知道为什么 我要在四月，而不是二月送你花吗？ |
| [29:15] | Because you ditched me the first time around to go back to the guy… | 因为你第一次抛弃我 |
| [29:17] | …who ditched you the first time, only to have him ditch you… | 跑回第一次抛弃你的 那个家伙身边 |
| [29:20] | – … the second time around. ” – The hell? That was him. | 但是他还是 |
| [29:23] | He was being you. | -再度地抛弃了你” -搞什么？那是他说的 |
| [29:25] | Well, in fairness, I think everybody should have a turn. Sam… | 他在模仿你 为了公平我想大家都该有机会的 山姆 有什么以前发生过的事 我们可以再拿出来开玩笑吗？ 对，就拿我写过的一篇叫做： “政府奖励制度原则的信任度” 的稿子吧 那真的很逊，对吧？ 我知道我回来时 他把我骂得有多惨吗？ -多惨？ -他什么都没说，我走了进去 他说： “谢天谢地，桌上有 一堆公文” ，这就是他的风格 每年四月他一定要羞辱我一次 消极攻击行为王子 -“羞辱”是什么意思？ -我不知道，但他就是会那么做 -还有咖啡吗？ -在厨房 -有人要吃东西吗？ -有没有起司蛋糕？ 现在是十二点十五分 面包师父通常会熬夜到天亮 |
| [29:28] | …is there anything we can pull, anything funny we can recycle? | |
| [29:31] | Yeah, pull something I wrote called: | |
| [29:33] | “Government-wide Accountability for Merit System Principles. “ | |
| [29:36] | That one was a barnburner, was it? | |
| [29:44] | Do you have any idea how much grief I took from him when I came back? | |
| [29:47] | – How much? – None. I walked in the door… | |
| [29:50] | …he said, “Thank God. There’s a pile of stuff on the desk. ” This is his way. | |
| [29:55] | He’s just gonna snark me every April. Prince of passive-aggressive behavior. | |
| [29:59] | – What does “snark” mean? – I don’t know, but he’s doing it. | |
| [30:03] | – There any coffee left? – In the mess. | |
| [30:06] | – Anybody want anything? – Think they have cheesecake there? | |
| [30:08] | It’s quarter after midnight, the pastry chef usually stays on until dawn. | |
| [30:11] | I’ll go see what there is. | 我去看看还有什么 |
| [30:14] | You know, we should make a joke about women… | 我们应该开女人的玩笑 |
| [30:16] | …because there’s no law against that or paying them less money than men. | 因为那么做并不违法 或让她们领的薪水比男人少 |
| [30:20] | Well, there is a law against that, the Pay Equity Act. | 根据公平薪资法 那么做是违法的 |
| [30:22] | It was passed in 1964 when women were making 59 cents to the dollar. | 这项法令在1964年通过的 那时女人赚五角九分，男人赚一块 |
| [30:26] | – What are you making now? – 79 cents. | -现在你赚多少？ -七角九分 |
| [30:28] | – So everything’s fine. – No, there are still some problems… | -一切都非常完美 -不，还是有一些问题 |
| [30:30] | …but I’m not worried because the federal government’s coming to the rescue. | 但我不担心 因为联邦政府会来解决问题 |
| [30:33] | – Look… – You think pay disparity is because… | -听着 -你认为薪资不公平是因为 |
| [30:36] | …some sexist in human resources hired two people for equal positions… | 在人事部有些性别歧视者 雇用两个人担任相同的职位 |
| [30:39] | – … and paid the man more? – Oftentimes women… | -但男人领的薪水比较多？ -通常女人 |
| [30:41] | And oftentimes women make less money over their lifetime… | 通常女人一辈子 赚的钱比较少 |
| [30:44] | – … because they choose to. – Oh, good night, nurse. | -因为她们选择要那么做 -晚安，护士 |
| [30:47] | They don’t choose to make less, they’re financially punished for having kids. | 她们没有选择要赚得比较少 她们因为有孩子在经济上遭到制裁 |
| [30:50] | – They made a choice to have kids. – Well, not necessarily… | -她们选择要生孩子 -我们可以不要那么做 |
| [30:53] | …if you guys have your way, but that’s a different can of tuna. | 如果男人可以生出孩子来 但那是不一样的故事 |
| [30:56] | I flat out guarantee you that if men were biologically responsible for procreation… | 我跟你保证如果男人 在生理上得负起生孩子的责任 |
| [31:00] | …there’d be paid family leave in every Fortune 500. | 所有财星五百的公司 都会付钱让员工休育婴假 |
| [31:03] | If men were biologically responsible for procreation, they’d fall down… | 如果男人得负责生孩子 他们第一次照超音波 |
| [31:07] | – … and die at the first sonogram. – If the amendment’s redundant… | -就会昏倒死掉 -如果修正案是重复的 |
| [31:10] | …what’s your problem if it’s passed or not? | 它通不通过 对你来说有什么关系？ |
| [31:11] | Because I’m a Republican. Have we met? I believe every time… | 因为我是共和党员，我们认识吗？ 我相信每一次 |
| [31:15] | …the federal government hands down a law, it leaves… | 联邦政府制定法律 都会让 |
| [31:17] | …for the rest of us a little less freedom. | 我们少了一点自由 |
| [31:19] | So I say, let’s just stick to the ones we absolutely need… | 所以我说我们应该 坚持不可或缺的法律 |
| [31:23] | …in order to have water come out of the faucet and our cars not stolen. | 像是让水龙头可以流出自来水 车子不会被偷 |
| [31:27] | That is my problem with passing a redundant law. Sam? | 那就是我不想让重复的法律 通过的原因，山姆 |
| [31:31] | The all-night pastry chef… | 你说有面包师父值夜班 |
| [31:33] | …you were just kidding, right? | 是在开玩笑吧？ |
| [31:49] | He’s still on with State in the residence. | 他仍在官邸跟国务院通电话 |
| [31:56] | So Hoynes knows. | 何尼斯知道 |
| [32:00] | Hoynes is one of the 16? | 何尼斯是知情的十六个人之一？ |
| [32:05] | And he thinks the president won’t run again. | 他认为总统不会竞选连任 |
| [32:09] | – He thinks there’s a chance. – Will he? | -他觉得他有机会 -是吗？ |
| [32:12] | – Will the president run? – Where’s the first lady? | -总统会参选吗？ -第一夫人在哪里？ |
| [32:15] | Up in Manchester. | 她在曼彻斯特 |
| [32:17] | Why did she come to me after the State of the Union? | 发表国情咨文后 她为什么会找上我？ |
| [32:20] | Why’s she mad at the president? | 她为什么要生总统的气？ |
| [32:24] | Because the State of the Union set up the re-election run and somehow… | 因为国情咨文为他的竞选连任铺路 但是 |
| [32:27] | …she’s under the impression that’s not supposed to happen. | 她认为不该发生那种事 |
| [32:30] | – The first lady… – I have no investigative mind. Zero. | -第一夫人 -我不是当侦探的料，真的 |
| [32:34] | Took me six days and 23 minutes to figure it out. | 我花了六天又二十三分钟 才想出个所以然来 |
| [32:41] | He’ll run. | 他会参选的 |
| [32:44] | Yeah, because we stood in that office a couple months ago, you and I… | 对，因为几个月前 我们站在那个办公室里，你跟我 |
| [32:48] | …and you said, “Take my hand. We just… “ | 你说： “握住我的手，我们刚刚” |
| [32:54] | Never mind. | 算了 |
| [32:57] | He’ll run. | 他会参选的 |
| [33:01] | Hoynes was 14, who was 15? | 何尼斯是第十四个，第十五个是谁？ |
| [33:05] | Dr. David Lee. The anesthesiologist at GW. | 大卫李医生 乔治华盛顿医生的麻醉医生 |
| [33:10] | He had to know about the Betaseron. | 他得知道贝它干扰素的事 |
| [33:13] | – Getting back to Hoynes… – Leo, I need you to look at me… | -说到何尼斯 -里奥，我要你看着我 |
| [33:16] | …and tell me the doctor’s not under any kind of surveillance. | 告诉我医生没有遭到监视 |
| [33:21] | The doctor’s free to talk to whomever he likes. | 医生想跟谁说话都没有问题 |
| [33:26] | I’m sure we’re gonna find that out soon enough. | 我相信我们很快就会知道 |
| [33:28] | – He’s not gonna leak it. – Someone will. | -他不会泄露的 -有人会 |
| [33:30] | – Toby… – Leo, Hoynes left bread crumbs. | -托比 -里奥，何尼斯留下蛛丝马迹 |
| [33:33] | He wanted me to find out. A camping trip to Killington? | 他要我查出事实 到奇林顿参加活动？ |
| [33:36] | – That was a jackass move. – I don’t think it was. | -那是愚蠢的行为 -我可不那么认为 |
| [33:38] | He may be the only one who’s acting responsibly. | 或许他是唯一负责任的人 |
| [33:40] | – To who? – The Democratic Party. | -对谁负责任？ -民主党 |
| [33:43] | Seven and a half months till the Iowa caucus and no one’s been told… | 在过七个半月爱荷华州要办初选 没有人知道 |
| [33:46] | …the president might not be the nominee. | 总统可能不会是被提名人 |
| [33:48] | – He’s gonna run. – He may not have that option, Leo. | -他会参选的 -或许他没有选择权，里奥 |
| [33:54] | When this story breaks, it’ll be because we broke it. | 消息曝光后 也会是因为我们公布了消息 |
| [33:58] | And we’ll control it. And the public will accept it. | 我们会控制状况，民众会接受的 |
| [34:02] | It’s not like it’s unprecedented that a president conceal health issues. | 这不是第一次 总统隐瞒健康问题 |
| [34:10] | What do you think is gonna happen? | 你觉得会发生什么事？ |
| [34:14] | I mean it. What do you think is gonna happen? | 我是认真的 你觉得会发生什么事？ |
| [34:20] | Well… | 嗯 |
| [34:23] | …I suppose one of five things. | 我想有五个可能性 |
| [34:30] | The president can decide not to run. | 总统会决定不参选 |
| [34:34] | He can run and not win. He can run and win. | 他会参选但是落选 他会参选顺利连任 |
| [34:37] | – And what are the other two? – Leo… | -其他两个可能性呢？ -里奥 |
| [34:42] | – You think he’s gonna need to resign? – There’s gonna be hearing… | -你觉得他需要辞职吗？ -他得参加 |
| [34:45] | – … upon hearing upon hearing. – He hasn’t broken a law. | -数不完的听证会 -他没有犯法 |
| [34:51] | – The president’s on his way back. – Thanks. | -总统在回来的路上 -谢谢 |
| [34:57] | Says you. | 那是你说的 |
| [34:59] | And you don’t have to break the law to get served with Articles of Impeachment. | 总统不一定要犯法 才会遭到弹劾 |
| [35:06] | Toby, it is never gonna get that far. | 托比，不会那么严重的 |
| [35:15] | Write down the exact date and time you said that. | 请写下 你说下那句话的日期跟时间 |
| [35:27] | See, the thing about me is that mine is a dry wit. | 听着，现在我是肠枯思很 |
| [35:31] | And a dry wit, like a fine martini, is best enjoyed…. | 肠枯思很就跟好喝的马丁尼一样 最好是 |
| [35:40] | – Yeah, nowhere to go there. – What the hell took so long? | -对，这没什么帮助 -你们为什么这么久？ |
| [35:43] | We got the coffee, but then I spilled it coming up the stairs… | 我们煮了咖啡 后来我在楼梯打翻了它 |
| [35:46] | – … the first couple times. Where’s Josh? – You sent him to get the thing. | -而且不只一次，乔西在哪里？ -你派他去找资料 |
| [35:49] | For how long? I’ve had time to spill coffee, you know, a lot. | 怎么会那么久？ 我打翻了很多次咖啡 |
| [35:52] | – I’ll find him. – So, guys? | -我去找他 -大家听我说 |
| [35:55] | I made a decision downstairs. | 我在楼下做了决定 |
| [35:57] | I’m gonna register with the Republican Party. If you’re curious, it’s because… | 我要加入共和党 如果你们很好奇，那是因为 |
| [36:00] | – … they are a freedom-loving people. – We also like beef. | -他们是热爱自由的人 -我们也喜欢牛肉 |
| [36:03] | You insist the government is depraved for not legislating against… | 你坚持政府很腐败 因为他们没有立法限制 |
| [36:06] | …what we can see on newsstands or what we can see in an art exhibit… | 我们在报上看到的资料 或是我们在艺展上看到的东西 |
| [36:09] | …what we can burn in protest, which sex we’re allowed to have sex with… | 我们在示威时可以焚烧的东西 我们该跟那些性别做爱 |
| [36:12] | …or a woman’s right to choose, but don’t you dare try and regulate… | 或是女人有权利可以选择 但你不该限制 |
| [36:15] | …this deadly weapon I have concealed. That would encroach on my freedom. | 我隐藏的这项致命武器 那侵犯了我的自由 |
| [36:19] | And Democrats believe in free speech as long as it isn’t prayer in school… | 民主党相信言论自由 只要那不涉及资讯自由法案的 |
| [36:23] | …in the Freedom of Information Act except if you want to find out… | 学校祷告规定 除非你想发现 |
| [36:26] | – … if your 14-year-old’s had an abortion… – We believe in the ERA. | -你十四岁大的孩子有没有��胎 -我们相信平等权利法 |
| [36:29] | – Well, go get them. – How can you have an objection…? | -去打倒他们吧 -你怎么会反对 |
| [36:31] | Because it’s humiliating. | 因为那太侮辱人了 |
| [36:33] | A new amendment we vote on declaring that I’m equal under the law to a man? | 我们支持的新修正案 宣布我在法律下跟男人平等？ |
| [36:38] | I am mortified to discover there’s reason to believe I wasn’t before. | 我觉得很受侮辱 因为我发现以前我跟男人是不平等的 |
| [36:42] | I am a citizen of this country. I am not a special subset… | 我是美国公民 我不是在你保护下 |
| [36:45] | …in need of your protection. I do not need my rights handed down to me… | 的附属品 我不需要一群年老的白人 |
| [36:50] | …by a bunch of old white men. | 来告诉我我有什么权利 |
| [36:53] | The same Article 14 that protects you protects me… | 第十四号修正案 保护了你、我 |
| [36:57] | …and I went to law school just to make sure. | 我念法学院 就是为了确定这一点 |
| [37:00] | And with that, I am going back down to the mess. | 所以我要回到厨房去 |
| [37:03] | Because I thought I may have seen there a peach. | 因为我想我刚刚 看到了那里有桃子 |
| [37:12] | I could’ve countered that, but I’d already moved on to other things in my head. | 我可以反击她 但我心里在想别的事 |
| [37:25] | Josh. | 乔西 |
| [37:30] | – Well, that was predictable. – Yes. | -我就知道 -对 |
| [37:33] | – I’m trying to find that speech Sam said. – You know, we keep them on computer. | -我想找出山姆说的那篇演讲稿 -我们把资料存在电脑里 |
| [37:38] | – Well, yeah, sure, I suppose… – You don’t know how to use a computer. | -对，我以为 -你不会用电脑 |
| [37:41] | – Right. – Josh, Josh, Josh. | -对 -乔西 |
| [37:44] | – Yes? – Joshua, Josh, Josh. | -什么事？ -乔西 |
| [37:49] | What the hell is happening now? | 到底是怎么了？ |
| [37:51] | You feel, I believe, that this job was my second choice. | 你相信这份工作是我的第二选择 |
| [37:55] | Hey, I’m just grateful we were your last choice. | 我很感激 我们是你最后的选择 |
| [37:58] | I’m gonna give you a little gift right now which you don’t deserve. | 我要给你一份 你没有资格拥有的礼物 |
| [38:01] | If you’ve got your old Catholic school uniform on under there… | 如果你里面穿了 以前天主教学校的制服 |
| [38:04] | …don’t get me wrong, I applaud the thought, but… | 别误会我的意思 我很高兴你那么做，但是 |
| [38:06] | Okay, what I need is for you to stop being, like, you for a second. | 好吧，我要你暂时不要做你自己 |
| [38:09] | – Okay. – When I came back… | -好吧 -我回来帮你工作时 |
| [38:11] | …remember I had a bandage on my ankle? | 你还记得 我膝盖上缠着绷带吗？ |
| [38:13] | I told you I slipped on the ice… | 我跟你说我在走道上 |
| [38:15] | – … on the front walk? – Because you didn’t put down Kitty Litter. | 我跟你说我在走道上 -踩到冰块滑倒了？ -因为你忘记铺沙子 |
| [38:18] | – I was actually in a car accident. – You were in a car accident? | -事实上我出了车祸 -你出了车祸？ |
| [38:21] | – It was… – Seriously, you were in an accident? | -那 -你出了车祸？ |
| [38:23] | – It was no big deal. – You told me it was a late thaw. | -那没有什么大不了的 -你跟我说是地面结冰的关系 |
| [38:25] | Yes. I did. | 没错 |
| [38:30] | Anyway, they took me to the hospital… | 总之，他们送我去医院 |
| [38:32] | …and I called him and he came down to get me… | 我打电话给他，他来接我 |
| [38:34] | …and on the way he stopped and met some friends of his for a beer. | 他半路停车 跟他的朋友见面喝一杯 |
| [38:39] | He stopped on the way to the hospital for a beer? | 他在到医院的路上 半路停车去喝一杯？ |
| [38:41] | Yes. And so I left him. | 对，所以我离开了他 |
| [38:44] | Which was the point of my telling you this. | 那就是我要告诉你的事 |
| [38:47] | I left him. | 我离开了他 |
| [38:49] | So stop remembering that. | 所以请你忘记那件事 |
| [38:52] | What I remember is you took me back… | 我只记得 你又接纳了我 |
| [38:54] | …when you had no reason to trust me again. | 你根本没有理由 要再相信我一次 |
| [38:57] | You didn’t make fun of me or him… | 你没有取笑我或他 |
| [38:59] | …and you had every reason to. You’re gonna make fun of him now, aren’t you? | 你有理由那么做 现在你要取笑他，对吧？ |
| [39:03] | – No. – That’s why I didn’t tell you… | -不 -那就是我一开始 |
| [39:05] | – … in the first place. – I’m not gonna make fun of him. | -没有告诉你的原因 -我不会取笑他 |
| [39:08] | But just, what kind of a dumpkiss were you…? | 但你怎么傻到？ |
| [39:10] | He was supposed to meet his friends, he stopped to tell them he couldn’t. | 他本来就跟他的朋友约好 他只是要过去告诉他们他无法赴约 |
| [39:13] | – And had a beer? – Does this make you feel superior? | -所以他喝了一杯？ -这让你觉得自己高人一等？ |
| [39:16] | Yes. You are better than my old boyfriend. | 对，你比我前男友棒 |
| [39:23] | I’m just saying, if you were in an accident, I wouldn’t stop for a beer. | 我只是要说如果你出了车祸 我不会半路停车去喝一杯 |
| [39:28] | If you were in an accident, I wouldn’t stop for red lights. | 如果你出了车祸 我会闯红灯去看你 |
| [39:32] | Thanks for taking me back. | 谢谢你再度接纳我 |
| [39:35] | Oh, and the flowers are beautiful. | 还有那些花很漂亮 |
| [39:48] | Why not heighten security? | 为什么不加强警戒？ |
| [39:52] | At the airports. Why not heighten security, what’s the downside? | 为什么不在机场加强警戒？ 那么做有什么缺点？ |
| [39:57] | – Sorry about that. – What’s going on? | -对不起 -发生了什么事？ |
| [39:59] | – Charlie? I gotta make the call. – Yes, sir. | -查理，我得打通电话 -是的，长官 |
| [40:01] | Let’s get Garreth back. | 联络盖瑞斯 |
| [40:13] | Toby was just asking what the downside of going to a security condition was. | 托比问加强警戒有什么缺点 |
| [40:19] | The scanners they use take an hour to search the luggage of 250 passengers. | 他们使用的扫瞄器 一小时只能检查250位旅客的行李 |
| [40:25] | The condition requires two photo Ids, most people only have one. | 旅客同时需要两种身份证 大部份的旅客只有一种 |
| [40:29] | Delays. Delays are the downside. | 缺点是班机会误点 |
| [40:40] | – Mr. Garreth. – That timed out well. | -盖瑞斯先生 -时间刚刚好 |
| [40:44] | Hal. Okay, let’s do it. I’m ordering the airports to a two-condition. | 赫尔，好吧，就那么办 我会下令机场提高两级警戒程度 |
| [40:49] | You’ll have it in writing in about five minutes. Thanks. | 你会在五分钟内接到书面命令 谢谢 |
| [40:53] | – I didn’t know enough. – I know the feeling. | -我知道的还不够多 -我了解你的感觉 |
| [40:58] | I have no intention of apologizing to you, Toby. | 我无意跟你道歉，托比 |
| [41:01] | – Would you mind if I ask why not? – Because you’re not the one with MS… | -你介意我问你为什么吗？ -因为你没有得多发性硬化症 |
| [41:04] | …a wife, three kids and airports to close. | 你没有太太，三个孩子 还得关闭机场 |
| [41:07] | Not every part of me belongs to you. This was personal. | 我并不是完全属于你 这是个人隐私 |
| [41:11] | I’m not willing to relinquish that right. | 我不愿意放弃那样的权利 |
| [41:18] | It will appear to many, if not most, as fraud. | 就算大部份的人不这么想 很多人也会觉得这是欺骗 |
| [41:22] | It will appear as if you denied the voters an opportunity to decide for themselves. | 看来你没给选民机会 自己去做决定 |
| [41:28] | They’re generally not willing to relinquish that right, either. | 他们也不愿意 放弃那样的权利 |
| [41:40] | Mr. President, at some point in the near future… | 总统先生，在不久的未来 |
| [41:43] | …we’re gonna have to speak to some lawyers. | 我们得跟律师谈一谈 |
| [41:46] | Well, that’s what usually brings on the episodes, but if you say so. | 通常那会引起大骚动 但你觉得有必要的话就那么办吧 |
| [41:53] | – It’s 17 people, by the way. – I’m sorry? | -对了，一共是十七个人 -你说什么？ |
| [41:57] | You knew. We weren’t counting you. It’s 17 people. | 你知道的，我们没有把你算进去 一共是十七个人 |
| [42:11] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
| [42:15] | It may have been unbelievably stupid. | 那真的是太蠢了 |
| [42:19] | It may have been unthinkably stupid, I don’t know. | 那真的很蠢，我不知道 |
| [42:26] | I’m sorry, I really am. | 我真的很抱歉 |
| [42:35] | – I’ve gotta go in the other room and…. – Yeah. I’ll see you tomorrow, thanks. | -我得到别的房间 -对，明天见，谢谢 |
| [42:40] | Thank you, Mr. President. | 谢谢总统先生 |
| [42:54] | Okay, that was… I think that’s a good one. | 好吧，那是 我觉得那很好笑 |
| [42:57] | – Toby! – What do you got? | -托比 -你想到什么？ |
| [43:01] | Okay. So the president was asked to pick tonight’s menu. | 好吧，总统被要求挑选今晚的菜单 |
| [43:04] | And he says, “Just serve anything you want except lame duck. “ | 他说： “除了跛脚鸭 什么菜都可以” |
| [43:07] | – Toby, listen to this. – Okay. | -托比，你听听看 -好吧 |
| [43:09] | The president says, ” I know times are tough… | 总统说： “我知道景气不好 |
| [43:11] | …the NASDAQ just filed for not-for-profit status. “ | 那斯达克刚刚申请 成为非营利组织” |
| [43:14] | Toby. | 托比 |
| [43:16] | What about the one about the Pentagon? | 五角大厦的那个笑话呢？ |
| [43:18] | Okay, you have to try and imagine that the president is saying it. | 好吧，你得试着想像 总统说话的样子 |
| [43:22] | Tell me if you think this is funny. | 告诉我你觉得好不好笑 |