| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:10] | *Now you’re looking at a man that’s getting kinda mad* | *小炯最近很抓狂* |
| [00:15] | *I had lots of luck but it’s all been bad* | *天天霉运一箩筐* |
| [00:19] | *No matter how I struggle and strive,* | *发奋努力白劳碌* |
| [00:23] | *I’ll never get out of this world alive* | *老天从来不赏光* |
| [00:33] | Oh, Amy, this is gonna be fun. | 小美 会很有意思的 |
| [00:35] | – I think so. – A nice quiet night together. | -我也觉得 -共度安静美好的夜晚 |
| [00:37] | – Yeah, it’s gonna be good. – Movie night. | -是啊 会很不错 -电影之夜 |
| [00:38] | – Uh, sir? – Yeah? | -不好意思先生 -咋了 |
| [00:40] | Um, you have some late charges here | 您租借的电影《放荡的妓女》 |
| [00:42] | on the movie “Whores on the Loose.” | 需要交一些延期罚金 |
| [00:44] | – What? – No no. No no no. | -什么 -不不 不可能 |
| [00:47] | – Stop right there. – Tim! | -别说了 -小炯 |
| [00:48] | – I did not rent that. – You sure did. | -我没租过那片子 -你确实租了 |
| [00:50] | You’ve had it out for 56 days. | 您已经租借56天了 |
| [00:53] | – Tim! – That’s crazy. | -小炯 -太疯狂了 |
| [00:54] | – I can’t even afford that. – I can’t believe this. | -我根本租不起 -真不敢相信 |
| [00:56] | No, what’s the plot? What happens? | 什么剧情啊 讲的是啥 |
| [00:58] | Okay, a bunch of whores go into a dance club | 一群妓女走进一个舞厅 |
| [01:02] | and whore it up all night long. | 放荡了一整夜 |
| [01:05] | That’s the plot? That’s not even a good storyline. | 就这样啊 这剧情可不怎么样 |
| [01:07] | – I’m leaving. – You’re leaving? | -我要走了 -你要走吗 |
| [01:08] | – Yeah, forget it. – It’s movie night. | -对 算了吧 -今天是电影之夜啊 |
| [01:10] | Tim, have fun with the whores. | 小炯 和妓女们好好玩儿吧 |
| [01:13] | It’s movie night. | 明明是电影之夜的 |
| [01:15] | Ooh. Actually, sir, you were right. | 其实先生 你是对的 |
| [01:18] | It was “The Notebook” that was late. | 是《恋恋笔记本》这部影片延期没还 |
| [01:22] | Not “Whores on the Loose.” | 不是《放荡的妓女》 |
| [01:23] | Nope. “The Notebook.” | 不是 是《恋恋笔记本》 |
| [01:25] | My bad. | 我错了 |
| [01:31] | – Oh, Stu? – Yeah? | -司徒 -什么事 |
| [01:32] | – I got problems. – Really? | -我出了点问题 -是吗 |
| [01:33] | I need to impress Amy somehow. | 我得想办法在小美面前重塑形象 |
| [01:35] | – Okay. – She thinks I’m a screw-up. | -好吧 -她觉得我就是个烂人 |
| [01:37] | That’s a fair assessment. | 这评价很公正 |
| [01:38] | – What’s that? – Don’t listen to me. | -啥意思 -当我没说 |
| [01:40] | Ask for a promotion. | 去求晋升吧 |
| [01:42] | – A promotion? – Yeah. | -晋升 -对 |
| [01:43] | – You think he’ll give it to me? – Yeah. | -你觉得他会让我晋升吗 -会的 |
| [01:45] | Just storm in there and lay down the law. | 只要你闯进去发号施令 |
| [01:48] | – Storm in? – Mm-hmm. | -闯进去吗 -对 |
| [01:50] | I don’t storm in anywhere. | 我不会闯进任何地方 |
| [01:52] | – Okay, I have a solution. – Yeah? | -好吧还有个办法 -是啥 |
| [01:53] | Walk in there nervously and lay down the law | 紧张地走进去 然后用结结巴巴 |
| [01:57] | in a stuttering, insecure manner. | 又不安的方式发号施令 |
| [01:59] | I can handle that. | 这个我能行 |
| [02:01] | That’s more my speed. | 这更像我的作风 |
| [02:04] | So I hate to just storm in here | 我不喜欢闯进这儿 |
| [02:07] | and lay down the law like this… | 然后像这样发号施令 |
| [02:08] | – Mm-hmm? – … but there’s no two ways about it. | -所以呢 -但我没选择的余地 |
| [02:13] | I’m… I’m due for a promotion and I’m here to claim it. | 我来这儿是要求晋升的 我应该升职 |
| [02:16] | I’m sorry. How did you get in here? | 不好意思 你怎么进来的 |
| [02:20] | – How did I get in? – Who on earth are you? | -我怎么进来的 -你到底是谁啊 |
| [02:23] | – I’m Tim. – Tim. | -我是小炯啊 -小炯 |
| [02:25] | – Timothy. – Yeah. | -小炯 -对 |
| [02:27] | Terrible name. Very weak weak. | 这名字太差了 简直弱爆了 |
| [02:29] | It implies a weak will. | 它意味着意志薄弱 |
| [02:31] | Have you considered changing it? | 你想过改名字吗 |
| [02:33] | How does “Keith” strike you? | 你觉得吉斯怎么样 |
| [02:35] | – Keith? – I have a daschund named Keith. | -吉斯 -我有条腊肠狗叫吉斯 |
| [02:37] | – What? – It would make things very easy for me | -啥 -如果你也叫吉斯的话 |
| [02:39] | if your name was also Keith. | 事情就好办多了 |
| [02:41] | I don’t want to change my name to Keith. | 我不想把名字改成吉斯 |
| [02:43] | That’s… my license I’ve gotta change… | 我还得把驾照也给改了 |
| [02:45] | All right, all right, but anyway listen, | 好吧好吧好吧 但不管怎样 听着 |
| [02:47] | I’m gonna give you this promotion. | 我会让你升职的 |
| [02:48] | That’s amazing. I got the promotion. | 太棒了 我升职了 |
| [02:50] | Done. I just need you to do me one small little favor. | 好了 我只需要你帮我一个小忙 |
| [02:53] | – Anything. – Tomorrow night, | -什么都行 -明天晚上 |
| [02:55] | you will accompany my daughter to her senior prom. | 你要陪我女儿去参加她的毕业舞会 |
| [02:59] | – Prom? – Golden years. | -舞会 -流金岁月舞会 |
| [03:01] | That sounds like fun, but I can’t go to a prom. | 听着挺好玩儿的 但我不能去 |
| [03:03] | – Some punk canceled on her… – No. | -有个小流氓放了她的鸽子 -不 |
| [03:05] | …and she’s been bawling and weeping in the bathroom ever since. | 从那之后她就一直在洗手间里大哭大闹 |
| [03:08] | I’m sorry to hear that, but my girlfriend… | 很抱歉 但我女朋友… |
| [03:11] | she doesn’t like me doing things with teenage girls | 她不喜欢我和小姑娘搅和在一起 |
| [03:14] | – in general dancing with them or… – Really? | -不管是普通跳舞还是别的 -真的吗 |
| [03:16] | Listen, just go to the prom, you get your promotion. | 听着 去舞会你就能升职 |
| [03:18] | That’s the way the business world works. | 商界就是这么运作的 |
| [03:19] | Come on, Keith! | 给点儿力 吉斯 |
| [03:21] | All right, if that’s the way the business world works. | 好吧 既然商界是这样运作的 |
| [03:24] | Good boy. | 好孩子 |
| [03:28] | Tim, why are you all dressed up? | 小炯 你干嘛打扮得人模人样的 |
| [03:30] | – I got great news. – Tell me. | -我有好消息 -说来听听 |
| [03:32] | My boss invited me to a black-tie function. | 我老板邀请我参加一个正式晚宴 |
| [03:36] | Yeah, right. | 好吧 |
| [03:37] | I am going to a black-tie function at work. | 我要在工作的时候去参加正式晚宴 |
| [03:39] | – You’re lying. – I’m lying? No. I’m up for a promotion. | -你撒谎 -我没撒谎 我升职了 |
| [03:42] | And after they asked me, they said, | 之后他们问我 他们说 |
| [03:44] | “Why don’t you come to this black-tie function tonight?” | “今晚这个正式晚宴你一起来吧” |
| [03:46] | Why do you keep saying “Black-tie function”? | 你干嘛老强调是”正式晚宴” |
| [03:48] | – That’s what it is. – What does that even mean? | -因为事实就是这样 -这又说明什么 |
| [03:51] | I can’t get into the details of corporate events… | 我不能跟家里的爱人 |
| [03:54] | – Why? – …with loved ones at home. | -为什么 -透露公司的信息 |
| [03:56] | What is it, a dinner? | 什么活动 聚餐吗 |
| [03:57] | It’s a black-tie function. | 是一个正式的晚宴 |
| [03:59] | Okay, well, whatever it is, congratulations. | 随便是什么吧 恭喜你 |
| [04:02] | – Thank you. – But why are you carrying a corsage? | -谢谢 -不过你干嘛带胸花 |
| [04:05] | You don’t do that at business dinners? | 商务晚宴不该带吗 |
| [04:08] | – No… – You don’t pin a corsage on your boss? | -不… -不该给老板戴上吗 |
| [04:09] | – No, you don’t. – I’m gonna bring it just in case. | -不该 -我带着它只是为了以防万一 |
| [04:15] | Ah, finally a meeting of the two Keiths. | 两个吉斯终于见面了 |
| [04:18] | No, I’m Tim, remember? | 不 记得吗 我是小炯 |
| [04:20] | – I thought… – Remember, I didn’t switch it. | -我以为… -记住 我没换名字 |
| [04:22] | – I thought you did. – I’m still Tim. | -我以为你换了 -我还是小炯 |
| [04:23] | Hmm. So anyway, you horny son of a bitch, | 随便吧 你个龟儿子 |
| [04:26] | the ground rule for tonight is this… | 今晚的基本原则是这样的 |
| [04:27] | it’s simple: don’t touch my daughter. | 很简单 不许碰我女儿 |
| [04:30] | – That’s it? – Don’t hug her, don’t shake her hand, | -就这样 -不许抱她不许握她的手 |
| [04:32] | don’t dance any closer than three feet away, you understand? | 不许在她三英尺内跳舞 懂吗 |
| [04:35] | Those are all subsets of the same rule? | 这些都是同一原则的子集吗 |
| [04:36] | Don’t touch my daughter. | 不许碰我女儿 |
| [04:38] | – Hi, I’m Crystal. – Oh, hey. | -我是小水晶 -你好 |
| [04:40] | – You must be Tim. – I am. | -你一定是小炯 -是我 |
| [04:43] | – I got you this. – Oh, a corsage. | -我给你带了这个 -是胸花 |
| [04:46] | – That’s so sweet. – If you’ll allow me… | -真贴心 -如果你允许我… |
| [04:49] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [04:50] | – Ow, that’s my boob. – Whoops whoops, no touching. | -你弄到我胸了 -我不碰你 |
| [04:54] | Ouch. That’s my boob again. | 又碰到我胸了 |
| [04:55] | – No touching. Hold on. – Timothy… | -不碰你 等一下 -小炯 |
| [04:58] | Let me get around back. Let me do it from back here. | 让我绕到后面去 从后面给你戴 |
| [05:00] | That is not my boob. That’s my ass. | 那不是胸 是屁股 |
| [05:03] | What is it? No, I’m just trying to gain my footing. | 这是什么 不 我只想站住脚 |
| [05:05] | – Timothy! – One second. | -小炯 -马上好 |
| [05:07] | – Forget the corsage. – All right, no touching. | -别折腾胸花了 -好 我不乱碰 |
| [05:12] | Keith? | 吉斯 |
| [05:19] | Oh, Tim, have you ever seen “Girls Gone Wild”? | 小炯 看过《狂野女孩》吗 |
| [05:23] | – Uh, no. – I’m in four of them! | -没有 -我有在四集里出现哦 |
| [05:27] | – Really? – Yeah. | -真的 -是啊 |
| [05:28] | I’m in “Girls Gone Wild: High School,” | 我在《狂野女孩:高中》里 |
| [05:30] | “Girls Gone Wild: Spring Break,” | 《狂野女孩:春歇》 |
| [05:32] | “Girls Gone Wild on the D-Train,” | 《狂野女孩在动车上》 |
| [05:34] | and “Girls Gone Wild in Front of the Post Office.” | 还有《狂野女孩在邮局前》 |
| [05:40] | – That one just came out. – Really? | -那个是新出的 -是吗 |
| [05:41] | You should look for it around Christmas. | 圣诞节前后你可以去搜下 |
| [05:42] | I will. Your dad knows about this? | 我会的 你爸知道这事吗 |
| [05:44] | Oh yeah, he totally supports it. | 知道啊 他很支持我 |
| [05:46] | No! Duh! | 没有啦 |
| [05:53] | So, Tim, I know that you like work with my dad and all, | 小炯 我知道你跟我爸共事 |
| [05:57] | but I just think you’re totally hot. | 但你真是太帅了 |
| [06:01] | – Really? – Yeah. | -是吗 -对啊 |
| [06:03] | – Nice. – I mean, | -谢谢 -我是说 |
| [06:05] | that cute little way you stutter and everything– | 你可爱的口吃模样 |
| [06:07] | – Really? – –it, like, totally makes me horny. | -是吗 -让我很饥渴 |
| [06:11] | Stuttering makes you horny? | 口吃让你饥渴 |
| [06:12] | – It just does. – Wow, that’s– that’s easy. | -是吗 -这么容易 |
| [06:15] | Um, listen, you’re– you’re a great girl, | 你是个很棒的女生 |
| [06:19] | and I’m– I’m glad I’m making you horny, | 很高兴能让你饥渴 |
| [06:22] | I really am, | 真的 |
| [06:23] | but nothing can happen tonight, you know? | 但今晚你我之间不会发生什么的 |
| [06:27] | I promised your dad I’d watch after you. | 我答应过你爸会照顾你 |
| [06:30] | And I have a girlfriend, | 况且我有女友了 |
| [06:33] | who I’ve gotta say I think she’s the one. | 我想她就是命中注定的那位 |
| [06:37] | Oh my God, we are totally dancing! | 天呐 来跳舞吧 |
| [06:49] | Hold on a second. I gotta take this. | 等等 接个电话 |
| [06:52] | – Amy, is that you? – Hi! Hey, Tim, | -小美 是你吗 -嗨 小炯 |
| [06:54] | I just want to see how it’s going. | 你还好吗 |
| [06:55] | – It’s going good. – Oh good. | -还好 -那就行 |
| [06:57] | Pretty straightforward black-tie corporate function. | 绝对是很正式的公司晚宴 |
| [07:01] | Well, that music’s kind of loud, isn’t it? | 音乐有点吵 |
| [07:03] | It’s the corporate theme. | 这首是公司的主题曲 |
| [07:04] | They’re just getting ready to do a PowerPoint presentation. | 他们在为做幻灯片铺垫 |
| [07:08] | – Ah, okay. – Let’s slam some tequila, brother! | -是这样 -来杯龙舌兰吧伙计 |
| [07:11] | Whoo-hoo, yeah! South of the border! | 太棒了 南方人 |
| [07:14] | – Whoa, what was that? – That’s the CEO. | -那人是谁 -首席执行官 |
| [07:17] | Whip out your sombrero! Let’s tie one on, chief! | 甩起你的宽边帽 一醉方休吧长官 |
| [07:20] | Who’s he– is he talking to you? | 他在跟 是在跟你说话吗 |
| [07:22] | He was pretty pleased with the quarterly results. | 他对这季度的业绩非常满意 |
| [07:27] | Ah. Okay, well… have fun. | 好吧 那你好好玩 |
| [07:32] | Okay, come on, Tim, get into it. | 来吧 小炯 过来 |
| [07:35] | I’m not allowed to touch you. | 我不能碰你 |
| [07:36] | – I have to stay three feet away. – Come on! | -必须退避三舍 -快来 |
| [07:39] | Just spank my butt rap-video style. | 在我屁股上打说唱的节奏 |
| [07:42] | Your dad is not into rap-video style. | 你爸不喜欢说唱风格的 |
| [07:45] | Don’t be such a lame date. Spank me! | 别这么闷啦 快打我 |
| [07:48] | I guess I have no choice. | 那我就没得选了 |
| [07:53] | Ouch! | 嗷 |
| [07:54] | What? What happened? | 怎么了 怎么回事 |
| [07:56] | – Hey! Hey, you! – Me? | -那个人 你 -我 |
| [07:57] | – Old guy, yeah! – Me? | -那个老家伙 没错 -我 |
| [07:59] | – You spanked that girl! – Yeah, that was an agreement we had. | -你打了那女孩 -是她让我打的 |
| [08:02] | – She requested it. – I didn’t mean a real spank, you loser! | -她要求的 -我没说要真打 蠢货 |
| [08:07] | I meant a fun, you know– ooh ooh– | 只是玩玩而已 |
| [08:10] | dance-floor spank! | 舞池里的拍拍 |
| [08:12] | I don’t even know what that means. | 我不知道是什么意思 |
| [08:13] | Not cool, Jumpstreet. What are you, some kind of rat? | 你这就不对了 你是谁 过街老鼠吗 |
| [08:16] | Hold that fucker down, man. I’ll get the principal. | 制服那个混蛋 我去叫负责人来 |
| [08:21] | All right, you, Timbo, phone number now. | 好了 你小子 电话号码给我 |
| [08:24] | – I’m calling your parents. – No no. | -我要打给你爸妈 -别啊 |
| [08:26] | – What do you mean no? – My parents live in ltaly. | -你这是什么意思 -他们住意大利 |
| [08:27] | Italy? Shut up. This is a prom. | 意大利 少废话了 这可是正式舞会 |
| [08:30] | It’s not an orgy, son. | 不是什么浪荡活动 小子 |
| [08:32] | I’m aware that I’m not at an orgy. | 我知道这是个正式场合 |
| [08:34] | – Zip it. – That much I know. | -闭嘴 -了解了 |
| [08:35] | Crystal, how are you doing? | 小水晶 你还好吧 |
| [08:37] | – He got me pretty good. – Of course he got you good. | -被他打得痛死了 -当然很痛 |
| [08:39] | Look at the mitts on this creep. | 看看这五指山 |
| [08:43] | So, yeah, Tim’s finally getting promoted. | 是啊 小炯终于升职了 |
| [08:45] | – lsn’t that great? – Oh, that’s wonderful news, sweetheart. | -很棒吧 -那太好了 宝贝 |
| [08:48] | – Good for him. – Yeah, I’m really proud of him. | -他真不赖 -是啊 我真为他骄傲 |
| [08:51] | Oh, you should have seen it. | 你真该看看 |
| [08:51] | He looked so cute in his tuxedo when he left. | 他走时穿晚礼服的模样 帅呆了 |
| [08:54] | Hold on, Mom. | 别挂机 妈妈 |
| [08:55] | Let me grab this other call. | 我有个电话要接 |
| [08:57] | Hi, this is Principal McCreevy | 你好 我是经理马克里维 |
| [09:00] | You’ve got to come down to the prom and pick up your son. | 你得来舞会接你儿子了 |
| [09:02] | – My son? – Your son. | -我儿子 -是的 |
| [09:04] | I think you have the wrong number. | 你打错了吧 |
| [09:05] | You think– your son Timothy, he’s here at the prom. | 你儿子小炯在舞会这 |
| [09:08] | Caught him spanking a young girl– her ass looks like a tomato. | 他刚打了个小姐 屁股都红成西红柿了 |
| [09:10] | Oh, that son Timothy. | 那个儿子啊 |
| [09:13] | Yeah, why don’t you send him home? | 你把他送回家吧 |
| [09:14] | False alarm, Mom. No promotion for Tim. | 情报出错 老妈 小炯没升职 |
| [09:17] | I figured as much. | 猜到了 |
| [09:21] | – Okay, let me get this straight. – Yeah? | -咱们把事情捋捋 -好 |
| [09:23] | Instead of attending the business dinner | 你告诉我说是去公司晚宴 |
| [09:25] | you told me you were going to, you went to a high-school prom? | 其实是去参加高中舞会 |
| [09:29] | No, I told you I was going to a black-tie function. | 不是 我告诉你说要去正式晚宴 |
| [09:32] | I delivered on that promise. | 我没食言 |
| [09:34] | Tim, you went to a prom with an 18-year-old girl | 小炯 你跟一个18岁少女去舞会 |
| [09:37] | and you spanked her so hard she can hardly walk. | 还打得她路都没法走 |
| [09:40] | The spank got away from me. | 我出手有点重了 |
| [09:42] | – And you got sent home! – Yeah. | -然后你被遣送回家了 -是啊 |
| [09:43] | They send you home once you spank someone. | 你打了别人后马上就被送回家了 |
| [09:46] | I’ve learned that lesson. Listen, Amy, | 这个教训我记住了 听着 小美 |
| [09:49] | – I did it for you. – For me. | -我这么做是为你 -为我 |
| [09:51] | – All of this. – Thank you, Tim. | -所有一切 -谢了 小炯 |
| [09:52] | – I really appreciate it. – Don’t mention it. | -真感谢你 -别客气 |
| [09:55] | I wanted the promotion. I was gonna spank my way to the top. | 我想升职 想一路晋升到顶 |
| [09:58] | That’s all I’m trying to do here. | 我就是朝这努力来着 |
| [10:00] | You know, I don’t ever want to talk about this again. | 我不想再谈这事了 |
| [10:02] | I like that plan. I like that a lot. | 我喜欢这计划 喜欢爆了 |
| [10:18] | – What a day. – Mm-hmm. | -今天真累人 -是啊 |
| [10:19] | – Any big plans tonight? – Nothing. How about you? | -晚上有什么计划 -没有 你呢 |
| [10:23] | Yeah, I’m actually having dinner with Amy and her friends. | 我就是跟小美和她朋友一起吃饭 |
| [10:25] | Well, let’s see, i’ve got my MetroCard. | 让我想想看 幸好带了一卡通 |
| [10:28] | I’ve got–. No seats available. That’s typical. | 还有… 又没座 老是这样 |
| [10:32] | Man, I feel bad for that old guy. | 伙计 我觉得那个老人很可怜 |
| [10:34] | Why don’t you give him your seat? | 那你怎么不给他让座 |
| [10:36] | You know, I might just do that. | 是哦 我不如就给他让个座吧 |
| [10:39] | – Excuse me, sir? – Hello. | -先生 打扰一下 -你好 |
| [10:40] | I couldn’t help but notice you looking for a seat, | 我看到你在找座位 |
| [10:42] | and I’d like to offer you mine. | 我想把我的座位让给你 |
| [10:46] | What the hell is that supposed to mean? | 你他妈的什么意思 |
| [10:47] | What does it mean? Are you not understanding me? | 什么意思 你不懂吗 |
| [10:49] | I was offering you my seat. | 我要把我的座位让给你 |
| [10:50] | You can sit, sir. | 你可以过去坐 先生 |
| [10:52] | Do you think I’m some kind of feeble old man? | 你觉得我是那种年老体衰的家伙吗 |
| [10:54] | – Oh, no. – Is that what’s spinning in your skull right now? | -不是 -你现在就是这么想的对吗 |
| [10:57] | Oh no, I was just being nice. | 不是 我只是想做好事 |
| [10:59] | I swim 10 laps every day. | 我每天游十个来回 |
| [11:01] | I can do push-ups with my John Thomas. | 我能用我的大屌做俯卧撑 |
| [11:04] | – Did you know that? – What’s a John Thomas? | -你懂吗 -大屌是什么东西 |
| [11:06] | – I think it’s a penis. – No, that’s not possible. | -我觉得就是阴茎 -不 不可能 |
| [11:08] | No, it’s very possible. I’ve seen it on YouTube. | 真的 非常有可能 我在优酷上见过 |
| [11:11] | – No, that’s too much weight. – You’ve got some nerve, | -不可能 哪能承受得起啊 -你怕了吧 |
| [11:14] | you condescending son of a bitch! | 狗娘养的还自以为了不起 |
| [11:16] | I didn’t mean to offend you. I’m sorry. | 我没想冒犯你 对不起 |
| [11:17] | – Well, too late, pal. – Too late. | -太晚了 老兄 -太晚了 |
| [11:19] | Yeah, sit down, you dick! | 给我坐下 猪头三 |
| [11:21] | What? What’s going on here? | 什么 到底发生什么事了 |
| [11:22] | I was being nice. | 我只是想做好事 |
| [11:23] | Just leave the guy alone, dude. | 你就别管他了 哥们儿 |
| [11:25] | This is not the reaction I was expecting. | 我没想到会是这种反应 |
| [11:26] | – It offends the hell out of me. – Why don’t we just drop it? | -妈的你就是惹到我了 -算了吧 |
| [11:30] | The only thing I want to drop is you. | 我就是想跟你算算账 |
| [11:32] | – You want to drop me. – I want to fight you. | -你想跟我算帐 -我要跟你决斗 |
| [11:34] | – You want to fight me. – I want to fight you. | -你想跟我决斗 -我要跟你决斗 |
| [11:36] | Come on, mano y mano, dude! | 上啊 单挑啊 哥们儿 |
| [11:37] | I’m not fighting anybody. | 我不会跟任何人打架的 |
| [11:38] | Everyone, relax. What was that? | 各位 冷静点 怎么回事 |
| [11:40] | You just got bitch-slapped. | 你被贱人扇了个巴掌 |
| [11:42] | I’m not fighting you. | 我不会打你的 |
| [11:44] | You can slap me all day, | 你可以整天扇我巴掌 |
| [11:45] | I’m not gonna fight an elderly– stop. | 我不会打一个老年人… 停 |
| [11:50] | How does this happen? Stop. | 怎么会这样 停 |
| [11:53] | Ouchie! | 哎哟喂 |
| [11:55] | You know what? Now we’re fighting. | 我答应你 我们决斗吧 |
| [11:57] | – Good. – All right. | -很好 -不错 |
| [11:58] | You pick the place. Hell, I’ll pick it for you. | 你挑地方 见鬼 还是我来挑地方 |
| [12:01] | Gleason’s Gym in Brooklyn, you chickenshit. | 布鲁克林区的格里森体育馆 胆小鬼 |
| [12:04] | Ah– okay. He’s not stopping. | 啊… 好吧 他还要打 |
| [12:08] | Stop. Stop slapping. | 停 停 别打了 |
| [12:14] | So I spent the summer in Slovakia | 所以我夏天都在斯洛伐克 |
| [12:17] | helping to build a school in a town | 在镇上帮忙创办学校 |
| [12:19] | where no real education system existed before. | 在此之前那里连正规点的教育系统都没有 |
| [12:22] | – Wow. – The look on those kids’ faces, | -哇塞 -看着那些小孩子的脸 |
| [12:25] | it’s just hard to put into words. | 真的很难用语言来形容那种心情 |
| [12:26] | That’s amazing. | 太神奇了 |
| [12:28] | Oh, honey, | 亲爱的 |
| [12:28] | tell them what you’re doing with the animals. | 跟他们说说你是怎么和动物相处的 |
| [12:31] | – Oh, um– – You wanna order something? | -哦… -你们想吃什么吗 |
| [12:32] | Well, now that you’ve asked, | 既然你们问起 那我就说两句 |
| [12:34] | I work with an animal shelter | 我跟动物收容所的人一起工作 |
| [12:36] | for ferrets and gerbils. | 照顾雪貂和沙鼠 |
| [12:37] | I drive them up to Westchester each weekend | 我负责每周末开车把它们送到韦斯切斯特 |
| [12:40] | and I’ll let them run free. | 让它们自由地奔跑 |
| [12:42] | You know, the looks on their little faces when I turn them loose, | 我把它们放掉的时候 看着它们的小脸 |
| [12:45] | they’re– now I’m doing it– | 它们真的… 我又忍不住了… |
| [12:47] | – they’re just so happy. – That’s incredible. | -它们真的非常开心 -不可思议 |
| [12:50] | I mean, I don’t know how you find the time for all of this. | 我想知道你哪来那么多时间做这些事 |
| [12:53] | Well, Amy, you know, you just make the time. | 小美 你知道 时间是挤出来的 |
| [12:56] | That’s right, sweetie. | 说得对 亲爱的 |
| [12:57] | – You just make the time. -Just make the time. | -时间是挤出来的 -是挤出来的 |
| [13:00] | Well, enough about me. | 我说得够多了 |
| [13:02] | Tim, do you do any charity work? | 小炯 你有参与什么慈善事业吗 |
| [13:05] | Not a lot. I’m just too busy. | 不太多 我很忙的 |
| [13:08] | Well, why don’t you join me Friday night? | 要不你周五晚上跟我一起去吧 |
| [13:10] | Come to the animal shelter. | 去动物收容所 |
| [13:12] | – l, uh– – We’ll bake treats for the gerbils. | -呃… -我们给沙鼠烤东西吃 |
| [13:14] | – No, Friday’s bad for me. – Aw, why? | -周五我没空 -是有什么事吗 |
| [13:17] | Yeah, what are you so busy with on Friday? | 你周五还要忙什么 |
| [13:20] | I’m boxing an old man. | 我要跟一个老人打拳击 |
| [13:27] | Oh, that was a fun dinner. | 这顿饭吃得挺开心的 |
| [13:28] | You’re boxing an old man. | 你要跟一个老人打拳击 |
| [13:30] | – Uh… – What is wrong with you, Tim? | -呃… -小炯 你哪根筋不对了 |
| [13:32] | – That’s a good question. – You and George are the same age, | -这个问题问得好 -你跟乔治同龄 |
| [13:35] | and he’s out there making a difference in the world. | 他在奋斗 在改变这个世界 |
| [13:37] | Hey, at least I’m out there fighting. | 嘿 至少我在搏斗 |
| [13:39] | It’s not like I’m sitting at home on the couch. | 我又没蹲在家里靠着沙发看电视 |
| [13:41] | That was so embarrassing. George does all these things. | 你真让我丢脸 乔治所做的一切 |
| [13:44] | – No. – He gives so much. | -不 -他付出那么多 |
| [13:46] | – You don’t do anything. – He gives too much. | -你却什么也不做 -他付出那么多 |
| [13:49] | When you’re flying to Slovakia, I think you’ve got a problem. | 如果你飞去斯洛伐克 我猜会有麻烦的 |
| [13:51] | I just think you have some serious soul-searching to do. | 我想你需要好好自我反省一下 |
| [13:54] | All right, I’ll go down and I’ll cancel the fight | 好吧 我认输 我会取消决斗 |
| [13:57] | and soul-searching– | 然后自我反省… |
| [13:59] | soul-searching might have to wait till the weekend. | 还是等到周末再自我反省吧 |
| [14:06] | Hey, Stu, thanks for coming down, | 嗨 司徒 谢谢你专程过来 |
| [14:08] | but I decided to forfeit the fight. | 但我决定放弃这场决斗了 |
| [14:10] | What possible reason do you have | 有什么理由让你 |
| [14:12] | to not want to fight an old man | 要放弃跟一个老人决斗 |
| [14:14] | in a weird old gym | 还是在一个诡异的旧体育馆 |
| [14:17] | with old men all over the place? | 被那么多老年人围观的形势下 |
| [14:22] | I get it. I guess I understand. | 我懂了 我想我明白了 |
| [14:23] | Yeah, Amy’s mad at me. | 小美生我的气了 |
| [14:24] | She wants me to start doing more charity work. | 她要我多多参与慈善事业 |
| [14:26] | – Excuse me. – Yes? | -打扰一下 -什么事 |
| [14:28] | – I’m Henry’s daughter. – Oh. | -我是亨利的女儿 -哦 |
| [14:30] | – Are you the young man from the bus? – I am. | -你是地铁上那个年轻人吗 -是的 |
| [14:32] | Listen, there’s no way I’m fighting your father. | 听着 我没想要跟你爸爸打架 |
| [14:35] | I just came to forfeit and apologize to him | 我只是想过来认输然后向他道歉 |
| [14:38] | – in case I hurt his feelings. – Oh. | -如果我伤害了他的感情 -哦 |
| [14:40] | I just want this to go away. | 我想就让这件事烟消云散吧 |
| [14:41] | Please, please don’t do that. | 拜托 请不要那么做 |
| [14:44] | Please don’t forfeit? | 不要认输吗 |
| [14:45] | It makes him feel young again. | 这让他有种回到年轻时候的感觉 |
| [14:47] | Won’t you fight him, please? | 你不会打他的 对吗 |
| [14:49] | I can’t fight an elderly– | 我不会打一个老年人… |
| [14:51] | Look, just take a dive and let him win. | 听着 你只要假装被他击倒 让他赢 |
| [14:55] | – Take a dive. – Yeah. | -假装被他击倒 -对 |
| [14:57] | This’ll be his last hurrah. | 这是他最后的心愿了 |
| [14:58] | You can look at it as charity work. | 你可以把这场比赛当作是种慈善事业 |
| [15:01] | It is like charity work, I guess. | 我觉得很像慈善事业 |
| [15:04] | – Right? – Yeah, it’s a lot like charity work, | -是吗 -是的 非常像慈善事业 |
| [15:06] | but instead of building a bridge | 不过与其在一个贫困的小乡村里 |
| [15:09] | in a needy village, | 建一座桥 |
| [15:11] | you’re gonna break the bridge of an old man’s nose. | 你会打断一个老人的鼻子 |
| [15:18] | – You look fantastic, champ. – The glory days. | -你看起来棒极了 勇士 -光荣日 |
| [15:20] | – You’re gonna take him, I can feel it. – Back to the glory days. | -你能拿下他 我知道 -重获荣光 |
| [15:22] | Just remember we’ll be with you every swing. | 记住你挥出每一拳时 我们都在你身边 |
| [15:26] | I gotta say this actually feels nice. | 我得说这感觉还不错 |
| [15:29] | – Mm-hmm. – I can see why people volunteer. | -嗯 -我明白人们为什么做自愿者了 |
| [15:31] | Let’s make it real fun for him. | 我们来让他真正开心一下 |
| [15:33] | If he used to be a boxer, then he probably loves to trash talk. | 如果他曾是个拳击手 那他就爱放狠话 |
| [15:36] | – I’m not gonna trash talk. – Come on, Timbo. | -我才不要放狠话 -来嘛 炯宝 |
| [15:38] | Step it up. This guy’s having the time of his life | 加把劲 现在是这家伙最开心的时刻 |
| [15:41] | and yelling vulgar obscenities is the only way to top it. | 只有喊出些粗鲁的下流话能锦上添花了 |
| [15:44] | What would I say? | 我该说什么 |
| [15:45] | “I’m gonna knock you out real good”? | “我要狠狠地把你揍一顿” |
| [15:49] | Wow, you’re like Hemmingway. | 哇 你就像海明威一样 |
| [15:50] | You’ve got to really lay into him | 你得真正地咒骂他 |
| [15:52] | – if you want to make it seem realistic. – Okay. | -要是你想让这看上去是真的 -好 |
| [15:55] | You say to him, “Hey, old man, I’m gonna knock you out. | 你得说”老头子 我要把你打趴在地” |
| [15:58] | And when I’m done with this, | “到那个时候” |
| [15:59] | I’m gonna go home and hump your wife from behind | “我就上你家爆你老婆的菊花” |
| [16:01] | – like a rabid dog.” – You think stuff like that | -“就像疯狗一样” -你觉得说这些 |
| [16:04] | – would help him enjoy it? – I think he’ll have a great time | -会让他高兴 -他听到这些话后 |
| [16:07] | when he hears that kind of stuff. | 一定会超开心的 |
| [16:12] | Okay, gentlemen, I want a good clean fight. | 先生们 你们得文明公正的打斗 |
| [16:14] | – Understood? – Understood. | -明白吗 -明白 |
| [16:16] | Oh, I’ll keep it clean | 我会打的很干净的 |
| [16:18] | by mopping the floor with this old man’s ass. | 就用这老头子的屁股来擦地板 |
| [16:21] | – How’s that sound? – Excuse me? | -听上去怎么样 -你说什么 |
| [16:24] | Let’s get it on! | 让我们嗨起来吧 |
| [16:26] | I am here to kill an old man. | 我来此杀一个老头 |
| [16:28] | – Good. – That is my goal for the evening. | -很好 -这就是我今晚的目的 |
| [16:31] | Tell him you want to cut off his skin and wear it as a coat. | 跟他说你想把他皮剥下来当衣服穿 |
| [16:33] | I’m gonna cut off your skin and wear it as a coat. | 我要把你的皮剥下来当衣服穿 |
| [16:36] | What an awful thing to say. | 说的真恐怖 |
| [16:38] | Oh, I’m gonna pound your face until you shit your pants. | 我要狠揍你的脸 直到你屁滚尿流 |
| [16:41] | – Good. – Who knows? | -很好 -说不定 |
| [16:43] | I might just go hump your wife afterwards back at the condo… | 我会去你家 从后面爆你老婆的菊花 |
| [16:46] | – What? -…after I knock the shit out of you. | -什么 -在我把你海扁一顿以后 |
| [16:48] | So you’re gonna pound me | 你是说你要打得我 |
| [16:50] | until there’s shit all over the floor… | 屎尿流了一地 |
| [16:54] | – Exactly. -…then go violate my wife? | -没错 -然后去强奸我的老婆吗 |
| [16:56] | I will be humping your wife within the hour. | 在一小时之内我就要去干你老婆了 |
| [16:59] | – Oh my God! – I’m gonna go into your cabinet | -天呐 -我会去翻你的柜子 |
| [17:01] | and switch your medications with my fist. | 用我的拳头把你的药弄乱 |
| [17:03] | Don’t you dare touch my medication. | 你敢碰我的药 |
| [17:05] | – I’m gonna switch ’em. – Don’t you dare! | -我要弄乱它们 -你敢 |
| [17:08] | – I’m gonna switch ’em. – You’re out of your mind! | -你要弄乱它们 -你疯了 |
| [17:10] | – I can’t breathe. – You ever feel a fist down your throat? | -我不能呼吸 -感受过拳头进喉咙吗 |
| [17:13] | I can’t breathe– | 我不能呼吸了 |
| [17:15] | – What happened? – Down goes the old man! | -怎么回事 -这个老人倒下了 |
| [17:20] | You sick bastard! | 你这个无耻的混蛋 |
| [17:22] | What? | 什么 |
| [17:23] | – Get out of the ring! – One, two, three… | -滚下台来 -一二三 |
| [17:26] | I never hit him. | 我没有打他 |
| [17:27] | -…eight, nine… – It’s only charity if I lose. | -八九 -如果我输了也是为了慈善 |
| [17:30] | …10! We have a winner, | 十 我们有了赢家 |
| [17:33] | – and his name is Tim! – No no. | -他就是小炯 -别别 |
| [17:35] | – Don’t hold my hand up. – Tim! | -别把我手举起来 -小炯 |
| [17:37] | – Tim! – Please stop doing that. | -小炯 -请你别再举了 |
| [17:40] | You monster! | 你这个混蛋 |
| [17:43] | Good news, gentlemen. | 有好消息 先生们 |
| [17:44] | Yeah? – He is eating solid foods and he knows exactly where he is. | -什么 -他能吃饭了 意识也清醒 |
| [17:47] | Now, could you help me out and tell me exactly what happened? | 你们能帮个忙 告诉我到底发生了什么 |
| [17:50] | – What happened? – Mm-hmm. | -发生了什么 -嗯 |
| [17:51] | Um, we were at a charity event… | 我们在做一个慈善活动 |
| [17:55] | – Okay. -…and there was a mishap, | -好的 -发生了一个意外 |
| [17:59] | – a minor mishap. – Charity mishap. | -一个小意外 -慈善意外 |
| [18:02] | – That’s kind of broad. – What sort of mishap– | -范围有点广 -怎样的意外 |
| [18:05] | Let me just clarify. Tim got in a fight with an old man, | 让我来说清楚 小炯要和一个老人打架 |
| [18:09] | – and threatened to hump his wife. – No. | -并威胁去睡他的老婆 -不 |
| [18:12] | And then he also said he was gonna beat him | 还说会把他打到 |
| [18:14] | until he lost control of his bowels | 大小便失禁 |
| [18:16] | and crapped on himself. | 拉到自己身上 |
| [18:19] | – I see. – Just put down “Charity event mishap.” | -明白了 -写上慈善活动事故 |
| [18:22] | That sums it up, no? | 就能概括了 |
| [18:23] | Could you wait here for one minute? | 你能在此稍等一会吗 |
| [18:25] | I have some paperwork for you to fill out. | 我得让你填一些表格 |
| [18:28] | Amy is so gonna find out about this. | 小美一定会知道这事的 |
| [18:30] | – How would she find out? – She always finds out. | -她怎会知道 -她总是能知道 |
| [18:32] | – Hey, Tim? – See? | -嘿 小炯 -看见没 |
| [18:34] | – Hey! – Hey, George. | -嘿 -嘿 乔治 |
| [18:35] | – Hi! – Why are you possibly here? | -嗨 -你怎么会在这里 |
| [18:37] | Well, I finished up early with the gerbils, | 我沙鼠那的事提早完成了 |
| [18:39] | so I thought I’d come down and help out with some retarded kids. | 就想过来帮帮弱智儿童 |
| [18:43] | – You don’t say. – I help mentally-challenged children | -真的啊 -我帮助智障的儿童 |
| [18:46] | set up their own MySpace pages. | 建立他们自己的QQ空间 |
| [18:47] | Incredibly thoughtful. | 无比的贴心啊 |
| [18:48] | You should see the looks on their faces when they log in. | 你该看看他们登陆时的表情 |
| [18:51] | I can only imagine how rewarding it is. | 我只能想到那是多么的珍贵 |
| [18:52] | – What are you doing here? – Uh, same thing actually. | -你在这做什么 -和你一样 |
| [18:55] | – Charity work. – Charity work. | -做慈善活动 -慈善活动 |
| [18:57] | Your words inspired me to get involved. | 你说的那些话鼓舞了我 |
| [19:00] | – Oh really? – Yeah yeah. Elderly. | -真的吗 -没错 帮助老人 |
| [19:01] | – Aw, that’s terrific. – Yeah, giving back. | -太了不起了 -回报社会 |
| [19:04] | Okay, son, if you could just fill this form out for us? | 好了 小伙 能把这表填一下吗 |
| [19:06] | Explain exactly how and why you were fighting an elderly man. | 解释你是如何并为何与一个老人打架 |
| [19:11] | It’ll just save some time for us when the police get here. | 等警察来了后 能节省点时间 |
| [19:17] | So before you say anything, | 在你说话之前 |
| [19:19] | I just want to thank you and your friend George | 我想谢谢你和你的朋友乔治 |
| [19:22] | for getting me into the world of charity. | 让我进入了慈善的世界 |
| [19:24] | Tim, what happened to forfeiting the fight? | 小炯 不是要你取消打架吗 |
| [19:26] | What are you talking about? | 你在说什么 |
| [19:28] | We never fought. He had the heart attack | 我们没打架 他心脏病犯了 |
| [19:30] | before any– before I landed any punches. | 就在我动手之前 |
| [19:33] | Tim, I just read the police report. | 小炯 我看了警察报告 |
| [19:34] | – Yeah? – “Hey, old man, you’re gonna shit | -是吗 -“老头子 我把你打到” |
| [19:36] | your pants after I open this can of whupass on you.” | “七窍流血后 你会拉在裤子上的” |
| [19:39] | – No. – What is that? | -不 -这是些什么鬼话 |
| [19:41] | – I don’t know. I didn’t say that. – It’s in the report, Tim. | -不是我说的 -报告上是这么写的 |
| [19:43] | – Who talks like that? – Saying you were gonna fuck his wife? | -谁会这么说 -写道你会去操他老婆 |
| [19:46] | That’s awful, hearing it back out of context. | 太可怕了 你不知道当时的语境 |
| [19:49] | – What kind of charity is that? – It’s not a great one. | -这算是什么慈善 -是不太好 |
| [19:53] | It’s not exactly Meals on Wheels. | 不像是送饭上门的那种慈善 |
| [19:56] | *These shabby shoes I’m wearing all the time* | *麻衣破鞋伴着我* |
| [20:00] | *is full of holes and nails* | *走过风雨许多年* |
| [20:04] | *and, brother, if I stepped on a worn-out dime* | *倘若踩到五角币* |
| [20:08] | *I bet a nickel I could tell you if it was heads or tails. * | *五分赌它正或反* |
| [20:13] | *I’m not gonna worry wrinkles in my brow* | *满脸褶子不用愁* |
| [20:17] | *’cause nothing’s ever gonna be all right nohow. * | *天掉馅饼是空想* |
| [20:21] | *No matter how I struggle and strive* | *发愤努力白劳碌* |
| [20:25] | *I’ll never get out of this world alive. * | *老天从来不赏光* |