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囧男窘事(The Life & Times of Tim)第2季第8集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计

Posted on 2024年7月13日 By jubentaici_movie_user 囧男窘事(The Life & Times of Tim)第2季第8集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计无评论
目录
S01E01
S01E02
S01E03
S01E04
S01E05
S01E06
S01E07
S01E08
S01E09
S01E10
S02E01
S02E02
S02E03
S02E04
S02E05
S02E06
S02E07
S02E08
S02E09
S02E10
S03E01
S03E02
S03E03
S03E04
S03E05
S03E06
S03E07
S03E08
S03E09
S03E10
时间 英文 中文
[00:10] Now you’re looking at a man that’s getting kinda mad. *小炯最近很抓狂*
[00:14] I had lots of luck but it’s all been bad *天天霉运一箩筐*
[00:19] No matter how I struggle and strive, *发奋努力白劳碌*
[00:23] I’ll never get out of this world alive *老天从来不赏光*
[00:27] My fishing pole’s broke, the creek is full of sand, *鞋儿破来帽儿破*
[00:31] My woman run away with another man. *女朋友都不要我*
[00:35] No matter how I struggle and strive, *发愤努力白劳碌*
[00:39] I’ll never get out of this world alive. *老天从来不赏光*
[00:51] Oh, man, it’s too hot. 天呐 太热了
[00:53] It’s got to be almost 25 celsius. 得有25摄氏度
[00:55] – Don’t give me celsius. – Too hot to handle. -别说摄氏度 -热的不知所措
[00:58] You gotta kill the rats, by the way. 顺便说一句 你把耗子整死吧
[00:59] They’re fucking all over the place. 操蛋的耗子到处都是
[01:00] These rats keep the cats away. 这些耗子连猫都不敢靠近
[01:02] Oh, what a day. 真是糟糕的一天
[01:03] – Tim. – Oh, Debbie. -小炯 -黛比
[01:05] How’s it going? Where’ve you been? 还好吗 你去哪了
[01:08] Oh, you know me. I’m a working girl. 你了解我的 我是个职业女郎
[01:10] Well, how’ve you been? How’s that girlfriend of yours? 你最近好吗 你女朋友还好不
[01:13] – Amy? Amy’s doing great. – Oh, good. -小美 小美很好 -真好
[01:15] You guys weren’t exactly friends, were you? 你俩并不是朋友 是吗
[01:17] No, we didn’t rent a rowboat together. 是的 我们没一起租过小船
[01:19] – That’s true. – But things are in the past and… -对滴 -但是往事…
[01:23] – Agh, damn! – What happened? -奶奶的 -怎么了
[01:24] – Something stuck me in the butt. – Don’t look at me. -啥玩意儿叮了我的屁屁 -别看我
[01:27] No, that was a Bumblebee right in my apple butt. 不 一只大黄蜂叮在我的翘臀上
[01:31] – You got stung by a bee? – They’re attracted to my scent. -你被蜜蜂叮了 -它们被我的香味所吸引
[01:33] – Your perfume? – Well, I’ve been spritzing -你的香水吗 -我在身上喷了香水
[01:35] my body and my lady parts with Sprite lately. 然后在女性部位喷了雪碧
[01:38] Do you drink the Sprite? 你喝雪碧吗
[01:39] Between that and the assless pants, 喷在那和这漏屁股的裤子之间
[01:41] I gotta say, you’re kind of asking for this. 我得说 你这是自找的
[01:43] Will you put your Frappuccino on my butt? 你要把你的发布奇诺放到我屁屁上吗
[01:46] Why are you talking like that? 你为啥这么说
[01:47] Well, my throat is getting… 我的嗓子开始
[01:49] Oh my God, your neck is thick. 偶滴神啊 你的脖子粗了
[01:51] – Oh, crap. – Let’s get you in a cab. -妈的 -咱们得叫个车
[01:53] Oh, no. We need some help over here. 不 我们需要帮助
[01:55] Thank you. We need to get her to a hospital. 谢谢 得把她送到医院
[01:58] – Get in there, Debbie. – Whoa whoa whoa. -上车 黛比 -停 停 等等
[02:00] No no no, I don’t want any prostitute O.D.-ing in my cab, all right? 不 不行 我不想让吸毒的妓女坐我的车
[02:04] – What? Who? – If she dies, it’s a paperwork nightmare. -啥 谁 -如果她死了 我没好果子吃
[02:06] She’s not O.D.-ing. It’s a bee sting. 她不是吸毒过量 是被蜜蜂叮了
[02:08] – Oh, it’s a bee sting. Oh, I see. – A bee sting. -原来是蜜蜂叮的啊 -我明白了 蜜蜂叮的
[02:10] That’s what they all say. Come on. 都这么说 糊弄鬼呐
[02:13] I can’t imagine that’s what they all say. 我想不出为什么他们都这么说
[02:17] I can’t breathe. 我不能呼吸了
[02:22] Just for the record, she’s been stung by a bee. 正式声明 她被蜜蜂螫了
[02:24] That’s my affiliation with the… the woman. 我和这个女人是朋友
[02:28] White people. 白人
[02:31] Debbie, you have a very serious bee allergy 黛比 你有非常严重的蜜蜂过敏症
[02:34] And you could die next time. 下次可能会死掉
[02:36] – Oh my goodness, could die. – Could die? -我滴神呐 死掉 -会死吗
[02:39] So no more Sprite on any body parts, okay? 别再往身上喷雪碧了 知道吗
[02:40] – That’s fair. – What about mountain dew? -这才对嘛 -喷私酿的威士忌酒成么
[02:43] Debbie, take care. 黛比 请珍重
[02:45] I don’t know if that guy knows what he’s talking about. 我不知道那个人是否知道自己在说啥
[02:47] You know doctors… they’re always having new theories 医生么 总会冒出像杂草一样的
[02:50] – pop up like weeds. – Yeah yeah. -新理论 -有哲理
[02:52] Whoo, where’s my little baby? 我滴亲亲小宝贝儿在哪呢
[02:55] – That’s my mom. – Your mom? -那是我妈妈 -你妈
[02:59] – This is emotional. – I was so worried about you, Debbie, -感人涕零啊 -我担心死你了 黛比
[03:02] And I ran all the way from queens in my rubber shoes. 我穿着胶鞋 从皇后区一路狂飙过来
[03:05] – Wow. – Did you put my Debbie in a hospital? -天呐 -我的黛比是因为你进医院的吗
[03:07] – No. – Did you bash in my Debbie? -不是 -是你打坏了我的小黛比吗
[03:09] Mom, I just got a bee sting. 妈妈 我被蜜蜂蜇了
[03:11] – Oh, thank the God. – Yeah, it was just a bee sting. -谢天谢地 -只是个蜂蜇伤
[03:14] – Why are you so skinny? – Her or me? -为何你骨瘦如柴 -是她还是我
[03:16] You. You got such a skinny body. 你 瘦得像小鸡一样
[03:18] Oh, no, it’s a normal physique. 不是吧 俺是标准体格
[03:20] No, ma, he’s the sweetest nervous man you’ll ever meet. 妈 他是你见过的最健壮最贴心的男人
[03:23] – Yeah. – How do you know my daughter? -没错 -你怎么认识我女儿的
[03:25] Uh, we… we’re friends, just… 我们 我们是朋友
[03:27] You’re doing my Debbie, and that’s all… 你在搞我的黛比 真是
[03:29] – No, I’m not. – No, I know what’s going on. -没 我没有 -不用说了 我知道怎么回事
[03:31] You two probably met in a subway toilet. 你俩可能在地铁的厕所相遇
[03:34] We really should not talk like this in the lobby. 我们真不该在走廊说这些
[03:36] I didn’t know the entrance of a hospital was called a lobby. 我不知道医院入口叫走廊
[03:40] I really see the resemblance, I gotta admit. 我得承认 我真看到了相似之处
[03:43] I really see it… in the eyes. 在我看来 我真这么觉得的
[03:48] Amy, you mind getting that? 小美 你介意去开下门吗
[03:50] I’m… I’m sitting. 我在 我在坐着呢
[03:53] – Hello, Amy. – Tell me this is a bad dream. -好啊 小美 -告诉我这是个噩梦
[03:56] – Oh, boy. – Mind if I let myself in? -妈呀 -介意我进来一下下吗
[03:58] I think you’re just gonna go ahead and do it anyway. 不管我说什么你还不是一样会进来
[04:01] – What are you doing here? – Yeah. -你有何贵干啊 -是呀
[04:03] I came over to say thanks. Your man here saved my life. 我是过来道谢的 你的猛男救了我的命
[04:06] – Really? – I thought I told you that. -真的吗 -我以为告诉你了呢
[04:08] You did not tell me. 你没告诉我
[04:09] That I was with Debbie for five hours yesterday. 昨天我和黛比待了五小时
[04:10] – Nothing. – Anywhoo anywhoo. -啥都没说 -不管怎样 总之
[04:13] Anywhoo, my mom and I had a talk… 总之 我和我妈谈了
[04:16] Mm-hmm, that’s nice. 那样很好
[04:17] And she said a woman with my medical condition 她说像我这样身体状况的女人
[04:19] should not be walking the streets, 不该在大街上招摇
[04:21] especially with assless pants. 尤其是穿着漏屁屁的裤子
[04:23] True. Anyway, it’s great seeing you. See you around. 没错 很高兴见到你 回见
[04:25] But, well, here’s the fun news. 我带来条趣闻
[04:27] – Ready for fun news? – Yeah. -想听趣闻吗 -好的
[04:29] I’m gonna be joining the family business with my mom. 我要加入我妈妈的家族企业
[04:32] I’m a palm reader now. 现在 我是个看手相的
[04:33] – Really? – A palm reader? -真的假的 -手掌识别大师
[04:35] Hey, would you two like to come by for a reading? 你俩愿意过来看看吗
[04:37] I would, but I actually have this regular person that I go to. 愿意 但实际上我有大师定期给我看
[04:41] Excuse me? 啥玩意
[04:42] Well, maybe I don’t tell you everything either. 也许我也没告诉你所有事
[04:44] More secrets. I’ll come by, Debbie. 秘密比我多 我会去的 黛比
[04:45] I’m really happy for you. This is great. 真替你高兴 太好了
[04:47] You’re so sweet. 你真好
[04:48] I’ll tell you what… how about 我会告诉你 看在往昔的份上
[04:50] a quick stick in the old Berry bush for old times’ sake? 让你的小鸡鸡在姐的蜜丛中爽两下
[04:53] Uh, I can’t picture that going over well. 我想象不出来
[04:56] Amy, it was a joke. 小美 这是个笑话
[04:59] Come on, smile. 快点 给姐笑一个
[05:00] At some point we have to be able to laugh about that incident. 某一时刻 我们必须要打哈哈
[05:04] – Oh, hello. – Hey. -你们来啦 -好啊
[05:07] – Yo. – This is a nice place. -好 -这地方不错
[05:09] – Mystical, very mystical. – Oh, thank you. -神秘 非常神秘 -谢谢
[05:11] I would like to welcome you to my salon. 欢迎你们来到我的客厅
[05:13] – Rodney, you’re first. – Yes. -大鲁 你先来 -好的
[05:15] Rodney, I see here you’re going to have a long life 大鲁 从这看出 你会长命百岁
[05:19] and financial prosperity. 财运亨通
[05:21] Bam! Perfect fortune. 砰 完美的命运
[05:23] – Bam! – Thank you, Debbie. -砰 -谢谢 黛比
[05:24] Mm-hmm. Stu. Where’s Stu? 司徒 司徒哪去了
[05:26] Debbie, I’m over here. 黛比 我在这呢
[05:29] – Stu, you are going to find inner peace… – Nice. -司徒 你将找到内心的平静 -太好了
[05:32] and true happiness. 还有真正的幸福
[05:34] That’s gotta make you feel good. 这会让你感觉很好
[05:35] I was hoping to be a tennis champion, but I’ll take it. 我曾希望做一名网球冠军 我会拿下的
[05:37] – Debbie’s two for two. – All right, let’s get me going here. -黛比 二试二中 -好了 该到我了
[05:39] – Okay. – Try that on for size. -好 -给我看看
[05:42] Okay, Tim, looks like you’re gonna get molested on Staten Island. 小炯 看来你会在斯塔顿岛遭到骚扰
[05:46] – What? – Two for three. -啥 -三试二中
[05:48] Can I just say I wish I’d gotten something that specific? 我能听些特殊的解释吗
[05:50] Read it again. Read the left hand. Read the left hand. 再看一遍 看我的左手
[05:52] Oh, well, you won’t like this one at all. 好吧 你不会喜欢这个的
[05:54] I’m afraid you’re gonna get really molested on Staten Island. 恐怕你真要在斯塔顿岛上遭骚扰
[05:59] No, my palm couldn’t possibly say that. 不 我的手掌不可能显示这个的
[06:01] I didn’t believe it, but then she said… 我刚才也不信 但她之后说
[06:02] when she looked at the left hand, 当她看你的左手时
[06:03] she said he was gonna be really molested. 她说小炯真的会被骚扰
[06:05] Right, that’s what sold me. 对 就是它把我出卖了
[06:07] That’s where I was like, 那是我喜欢的
[06:07] – “oh, that’s a good detail.” – Come on. -“这详情真棒” -算了吧
[06:09] Tim, if you’re skeptical, 小炯 如果你对此怀疑
[06:11] why don’t you go for a definite 为啥不多花50块
[06:12] – for another $50? – What does that mean? -确定一下 -什么意思
[06:14] Well, definite, when you know for sure. 明确 当你想确认的时候
[06:16] I can read the Tarot Cards. 我能读塔罗牌
[06:17] Here’s $30. Shuffle half the deck. 这有30块 在桌子上洗一半的牌吧
[06:20] Oh, look here. 看这张
[06:22] We got an island… 有一个岛
[06:23] A Staten Island card. 一张带有斯塔顿岛的牌
[06:24] No. 不是吧
[06:26] A man holding a sickle. 一个男人拿着一把镰刀
[06:29] That doesn’t mean anything. 那没什么意义
[06:30] – No, I never knew what that meant. – Yeah, moving on. -是 我不知道那是啥意思 -继续
[06:33] This one says so blatantly “hooters restaurant.” 显然这张是”猫头鹰餐馆”的意思
[06:33] 美国的一个快餐店 被人称为”成人麦当劳” 里面的服务生都是大胸部 罩杯在32C以上 黄色短裤.
[06:36] – Nice. – Wings. -漂亮 -翅膀
[06:38] What are you looking at? What are you seeing? 你看的是啥 你在看什么
[06:40] And look at this. That’s the butt card. 看看这张 是张有屁股的牌
[06:43] – The butt card? – It’s a giant butt. -有屁股的牌 -超级大屁股
[06:46] You sold the tarot card thing 你把塔罗牌
[06:48] as a much more legitimate science. 弄得像是更合理的科学鉴定似的
[06:50] The butt is the molestation card. 这张屁股牌 是骚扰牌
[06:52] – Clear as day, my friend. – Island, hooters, butt. -如此清楚 老兄 -岛 餐厅和屁股
[06:55] Butt. My palm doesn’t say that. 屁股 我的手掌可没显示这个
[06:57] Well, it’s a pretty fucked up palm. 你的手掌可真贱
[07:04] Oh, Tim, you never told me what happened with Debbie. 小炯 你从未跟我说过你和黛比的事
[07:07] Oh, that? According to Debbie, 那件事吗 据黛比所说
[07:09] I’m gonna get molested in Staten Island in the butt. 我的屁屁将会在斯塔顿岛上被骚扰
[07:12] Tim, that’s awful. 小炯 太恶心了
[07:14] Are you joking? 你开玩笑吗
[07:15] I told you, I take this stuff really seriously. 我说过 我很认真的看待这些东西
[07:18] When did you become like this? 你啥时候变成这样了
[07:19] Since I was a little girl. 小时候就这样
[07:20] – Since you were a little girl. – What are we gonna do? -你小时候 -我们该怎么办
[07:22] For starters, I’ll just avoid Staten Island. 首先 我不会去斯塔顿岛
[07:25] You can’t do that, Tim. 你不能那样 小炯
[07:26] I can’t avoid Staten Island? 我不能避免去斯塔顿岛吗
[07:27] I’m pretty sure I can. 我相当肯定我能
[07:28] Okay, what if we have to go to a wedding there? 如果我们要在那举行婚礼呢
[07:30] Go by yourself. 你自己去呗
[07:31] What if it becomes the next Brooklyn 如果那变成下一个布鲁克林
[07:32] and it’s the place we want to move? 还是我们想搬去的地方 怎么办
[07:34] – Have you seen Staten Island? – What if some day -你有见过斯塔顿岛吗 -如果某天
[07:36] my car breaks down on Staten Island? 我的车在斯塔顿岛上出故障了呢
[07:38] What the fuck are you doing out there? 你他妈的上那晃荡啥
[07:39] What if they open an IKEA there? 万一在那开一家宜家家居呢
[07:41] – What do you want me to do about this? – I don’t know. -你到底想让我咋整 -不知道
[07:43] I’ll tell you what I’m gonna do… I’m gonna talk to Susan. 我告诉你我将怎么做 我要告诉苏珊
[07:45] Your palm reader’s name is Susan? 手掌识别师叫苏珊
[07:47] Yes, and I’m gonna ask her what we should do about this. 是的 我会问她该怎么处理这事
[07:49] Not a very mystical or enchanting name. 名字一点也不神秘妩媚
[07:51] She knows what she’s doing. 她知道自己在干嘛
[07:53] “Susan” doesn’t make me feel good. “苏珊”让我很不爽
[07:55] Well, neither will getting molested in the butt, Tim. 谁都不会被骚扰的 小炯
[08:00] I don’t understand. Amy’s freaked out? 小美被吓坏了 我不明白
[08:02] She says she believes in this stuff. Can you even picture that? 他说他相信这些东西 你能想象出来吗
[08:05] I have imagined a lot of things about Amy, 我已想象过好多关于小美的事情
[08:07] That’s not one of ’em. 但那不在其中
[08:08] One is that she’s a nurse and I’ve been injured… 想像过她是名护士 我受伤了
[08:10] All right, this is not gonna go away. 哎呀 这事儿没完了
[08:13] She’s not gonna forget about this. 她不会忘了这事的
[08:14] Amy’s worried the prediction is hanging over your head. 小美担心这个预言将威胁到你
[08:17] – Just force it to come true. – There you go. -你就想办法让它发生吧 -给你
[08:19] I don’t want it to come true. What do you mean? 我可不想让预言成真 你啥意思
[08:21] Right, but look, it means we go to a hooters in Staten Island; 就是说 我们去斯塔顿岛找一个猫头鹰餐馆
[08:24] One of us will pretend to molest you. 我们其中一人假装骚扰你
[08:27] – Right. – Then technically -没错 -技术上来说
[08:28] the prediction has been fulfilled. 预言实现了
[08:30] Sounds dubious. 听着不太靠谱
[08:32] Best case scenario… it calms Amy down; 最好的情况是 能稳住小美
[08:34] Worst case scenario… we hang out at a hooters all night 最坏的情况 咱们能在猫头鹰餐馆逍遥一晚
[08:37] drinking beer and looking at tits. 喝着小酒 欣赏着美胸
[08:38] It’s a win-win. 双赢计划
[08:43] I don’t know about you guys, 我不知你们怎么想
[08:44] but my knife has body glitter all over it. 我的刀可是闪闪发光
[08:46] This place seems a little low-rent. 这地方看着有点不正规啊
[08:48] It really is, isn’t it? 真是这样 是吗
[08:51] And we are not men of refined taste. 咱们又不是什么高品位的人
[08:51] Honk honk, honk honk. Welcome to honkers. 哔哔 哔哔 欢迎来到红客之家
[08:54] – What? – I’m sorry, what did you just say? -什么 -抱歉 你刚才说什么
[08:56] – Honkers? – What part of -红客之家 -哪部分
[08:58] “honk honk, welcome to honkers” did you not understand? “哔哔 哔哔 欢迎来到红客之家”你没听懂
[09:00] I think we understood it… 我们刚才理解成
[09:02] I said “honk” on one boob and then “honk” on the other. 我按住乳房左右开工 一边一个哔哔
[09:04] Clarity was not the issue. 我们不是想要知道这个
[09:05] We just thought that this was a hooters. 我们只是以为这是个猫头鹰餐馆
[09:07] Well, it used to be, but there was a bit of a dispute, 曾经是的 后来发生了一些纠纷
[09:09] – a franchise thing, I don’t know. – No! -经营权什么的 我不知道 -不
[09:11] – I’m just a waitress, okay? – We came out here for nothing. -我只是个服务员 -我们白来了
[09:13] How are we doing, fellas? Everything okay? 怎么样 伙计们 一切还好不
[09:15] We’re just a little disappointed that this isn’t a hooters. 这不是猫头鹰餐馆 我们有点失望
[09:18] That’s ridiculous. Look around ya. 真好笑 看看你周围
[09:20] We got hooters-quality wings. 我们有猫头鹰特质的翅膀
[09:22] We got the boobs-and-burger bargain. 有便宜的乳房表演和汉堡
[09:24] And don’t forget the honkers hook. 还有猫头鹰的哔哔
[09:27] – The honkers hook? – Our waitresses -猫头鹰的哔哔 -我们的服务员
[09:29] Will lick the barbecue sauce off your fingers. 会舔走你手上的烤肉调味酱
[09:31] Tiffany, do a little something. 蒂芙尼 给他们看看
[09:35] Ooh, you got barbecue sauce on your wedding ring. Mm. 你的婚戒上沾到烤肉调味酱了
[09:39] – I’m onboard. – Sold. -我待定了 -同上
[09:40] I just gotta speak up… you don’t find this demeaning? 我必须要说 你不觉得这有损人格吗
[09:44] I don’t know. It’s either here or Starbucks, you know? 不觉得 这在星巴克也很常见
[09:46] And I cannot stand those green aprons that they make you wear 我受不了非要穿上的绿裙子
[09:48] drawing attention to your crotch. It’s like, come on, what am I? 盯着你的胯部 拜托 姐是什么人啊
[09:51] Look, the deal is, fellas, this is the place for boobs and food. 伙计们 主要是这是个乳房与食物并存之地
[09:54] And as we like to say… 就像我们常说的
[09:56] There’s no place like honkers. 红客之家绝无第二家
[09:59] What happened to the honking? 咋不鸣笛了
[10:01] Oh, I’m sorry. Honk honk, vroom! 抱歉 忘了 哔哔 哔哔
[10:03] Oh, you’re terrific, baby. You have food up. 太给力了 宝贝 去端盘子
[10:06] Listen, guys, I think we gotta get out of here and go to hooters. 同志们 咱得离开这找猫头鹰餐馆
[10:08] No, but I think they’ve proven us that this is better than hooters. 不 他们已经证明了 这比猫头鹰好
[10:11] Let’s just get it going. And then we’ll watch the game. 咱就继续呆着 然后看节目
[10:13] – Fine. – Okay, who’s gonna do the molesting? -好吧 -谁来性骚扰
[10:15] – I don’t have a preference. – I am a big guy with meaty hands. -我不好这口 -我这猛男有着结实的双手
[10:18] But I have just a much more molesty vibe to me. 但对我来说 你只是营造了淫秽的气氛而已
[10:22] Fine. You win. 好吧 你赢了
[10:23] I don’t think “you win” is the right phrase. 我不觉得”你赢了”是个正确的短语
[10:26] How graphic do you want to get here? 你想要多逼真的骚扰啊
[10:28] You want a little hand-on-butt contact? 你想来点手摸屁股吗
[10:30] Just the bare minimum that would technically count. 意思一下 就算过关了
[10:32] Why don’t you, like, lick my arm or something? 为什么你不舔舔我的胳膊或是别的地方
[10:35] What is that? That’s not molesting. 那是啥 那不算性骚扰
[10:37] If you do it the right way. Just make it quick. 如果你方法正确 快点来吧
[10:39] Okay, we’ll do in and out, literally. 咱们就进进出出 字面意思
[10:41] – I didn’t mean that. – Yeah. -但不是那个意思 -我知道
[10:43] – Let me get into character real quick. – Okay. -咱快点入戏吧 -好吧
[10:45] And action. 开始
[10:48] You want a ride home from uncle Stu? 你想从司徒大叔那骑回家吗
[10:50] Stu, why are you molesting me? 司徒 为啥你在骚扰我
[10:52] I’m molesting you ’cause you’ve been bad. 我骚扰你是因为你坏掉渣了
[10:54] Oh, the prediction is coming true. 哎呀 预言真的实现了
[10:56] Yeah, you’re a bad boy. Uh-oh, where’s my hand going? 你这个坏小子 我的手到哪了
[10:58] – Stu, what are you doing? Stop. – That’s right. -司徒 你在干嘛 住手 -这就对了
[11:00] – Stop. – Ooh, Tim’s been a bad boy -住手 -小炯是个混球
[11:02] And Stu has got to show little Timmy 司徒要展示一下小炯炯
[11:04] What bad things he does and what happens with his body. 看看他干了什么坏事 他的身体怎么了
[11:07] Stop stop. It’s over. We did it. 停 行了 完事了 做完了
[11:09] I got lost in the character. I don’t know what I said. 我太入戏了 不知道自己说了什么
[11:11] Was it good? 我演的真吧
[11:11] Just for the record, I think that counted. 正式声明 我觉得那算数了
[11:14] Wanna shake on it? 想要握手吗
[11:15] I feel like you’re gonna do something weird if I do. 感觉我要是和你握手 你会做点啥
[11:17] – Boy humping went smooth? – Went as smooth as Tim’s butt. -小伙性交还顺利不 -像小炯屁屁一样顺滑
[11:20] – Nice. – At least it’s over. Thank you. -漂亮 -总算完事了 谢谢你
[11:23] Look, what are friends for if not to molest one another? 如果不互相骚扰 朋友是干什么的
[11:25] Hopefully Amy will let this drop now. 这回 希望小美能放下这件事
[11:27] Now let’s watch the game. Let’s get some beers. Let’s have fun. 现在 咱看节目 来点啤酒逍遥起来吧
[11:30] All right, all right, which one of you freakin’ Smurfs 好吧 好吧 哪个怪异的蓝精灵
[11:33] said the word “demeaning” to my girlfriend? 对我女朋友说”有损人格”这个词
[11:36] – Who are you? The FONZ? – I’m sorry, what did you say? -你是谁 方茨吗 -抱歉 你刚才说啥
[11:39] The way you talk… I’m sorry, I was just making… 你说话的方式 抱歉 我只是
[11:41] Did you just call me the fonz, bro? 你刚才是叫我方茨吗 老兄
[11:43] I found… I found it funny. 我觉得 觉得好玩
[11:45] What’s demeaning about her job? 她的工作怎么有损人格了
[11:46] She licks the fingers of everyone and… 她舔所有人的手指
[11:49] So what? You don’t enjoy that? 那又怎样 你不也很享受吗
[11:51] On her behalf I was saying “girl power,” right? 从她的立场讲我说的是”妇女权利”
[11:54] No glass ceiling. Hillary Clinton. 没有所谓的玻璃天花板 希拉里·克林顿
[11:54] 玻璃天花是指 虽然公司高层的职位对某个群体来说并非遥不可及 却无法真正接近 看似前途光明远大 实则被透明玻璃阻隔
[11:56] All right, you said your piece, you piece of shit. 你直言不讳 你这一堆大粪
[11:58] – You know what’s demeaning? – No. -你知道什么叫有损人格吗 -不知道
[12:00] Me shoving your face into a toilet bowl. 我把你的大脸塞进抽水马桶里
[12:02] Is that just a rhetorical statement 你那是夸张的陈述
[12:04] or is that what’s about to happen? 还是将要发生的事
[12:06] You know, that would actually not be a bad experience 你知道吗 那真不算是一次糟糕的经历
[12:08] ’cause we’re very clean at honkers, unlike hooters. 因为我们这很干净 不像猫头鹰餐馆
[12:11] And as we like to say, 正如我们喜欢说的
[12:13] There’s no place like honkers! 红客之家绝无第二家
[12:18] Honk honk. 哔哔 哔哔
[12:27] – This is exciting, huh? – This is gonna be fun. -好激动啊 -会很有趣
[12:30] A weekend in Orlando. We are going to go to Epcot Center. 在奥兰多过周末 我们会去艾波卡特中心
[12:34] And then we are gonna go to Kissimmee-St. Cloud. 之后我们会去基米西街
[12:36] And then we’re gonna go to, um, a bar. 再去个酒吧
[12:41] Field trip. Field trip. 实地考察 实地考察
[12:43] Boo-boo-boo doo-doo! All right! 好了
[12:44] God, these bus fumes are killing me. 天呐 我要被这些汽车尾气整死了
[12:47] Glad to see everyone packed and ready to go. 看到大家都打好包准备上路 真好
[12:49] One little change… this year’s corporate retreat 一点小变动 预先宣布今年的的拓展活动
[12:51] will not be held in Orlando as previously announced. Thank you. 不会在奥兰多举办 谢谢
[12:54] Not held in Orlando. 不在奥兰多举行
[12:56] Hey, wait, it’s canceled? 等一下 取消了吗
[12:58] Oh, we’re going somewhere, but just not Orlando. 我们打算去别的地方 但不是奥兰多
[13:00] – So where are we going? – Let me give you some hints… -那我们去哪 -给你点提示吧
[13:02] Cold, filthy, coated in borscht, end of the “f” line. 寒冷 肮脏 罗宋汤 以”f”结尾
[13:05] Come on, lemmings, on the buses. Boop boop! 加油 旅鼠们 上车
[13:09] I have a bad feeling we’re going to Coney Island. 有种不祥的预感 我们要去康尼岛
[13:12] So cold out here. 这真冷啊
[13:15] Holy shit. 天啊
[13:17] My balls are touching my kidneys. 我的睾丸都缩起来了
[13:19] All right, everybody, now I’m sure you’re wondering 大伙 现在 我确信你们都在想
[13:21] why you’re not in Orlando. 为什么你们不在奥兰多
[13:22] – Am I right? – Yes. -我说的对吗 -对
[13:24] Well, that initial betrayal kicks off the theme of this year’s retreat… 今年的拓展活动的主题以背叛开始
[13:27] Distrust building. 怀疑的建立
[13:29] – That’s the theme? – People don’t work hard -这是主题吗 -当人们信任自己的同事
[13:31] when they trust their coworkers. 他们就不努力工作了
[13:33] You just sit around and talk about your weekends 只是坐成一圈 谈论各自的周末
[13:35] and share photos of your horrible-looking 分享你们那长相寒碜
[13:37] buck-toothed children 长有兔子牙的孩子的照片
[13:38] and your obese, horrible, ugly wives. 还有你那肥胖 讨厌还丑陋的妻子
[13:40] That’s not an issue for me ’cause I don’t have a wife or a child. 我不会有这些问题 因为我没有妻儿
[13:43] Everyone knows that. You don’t need to interject. 众人皆知 你不需要插嘴
[13:45] What’s wrong with being friends with your coworkers? 和同事成为朋友怎么了
[13:47] People work hard when they hate their coworkers, 当他们憎恨同事时 当认为周围所有人
[13:50] When they think everyone around them 都在工作上故意惹麻烦
[13:51] is gunning for their jobs 时不时在背后捅你一刀时
[13:53] and looking to stab them in the back. 他们就会努力工作
[13:54] So we’re gonna build suspicion and hurt some feelings. 所以我们将建立你们之间的猜疑并伤害他人
[13:57] And we’re gonna go in the order of the shortest first name first. 我们会按照顺序 名字最短的人开始
[14:00] T-I-M, Tim, that’s you. Go. T-I-M 小炯 就是你了 开始
[14:01] I’m not following. What do I do? I make people hate me? 我不说 我该怎么办 让大家恨我吗
[14:05] No, who’s your top dog here? 不 这里谁是你的上司
[14:06] Who’s your best friend? 谁是你最好的好朋友
[14:07] – Please say me. Please say me. – Stu. -说我 说我 -司徒
[14:09] – Yes. – God, Timmy. -是的 -天呐 小炯
[14:11] Good start… a division between your top dogs. 好的开始 你跟上司的意见有了分离
[14:13] Now tell us something horribly embarrassing about Stu. 现在告诉我们一下让司徒极度难堪的事情
[14:18] I want a breach of trust, Tim. 我想听到违反信托的事 小炯
[14:20] Tell him how much I can bench. 告诉他我能举多重
[14:21] Something awful about him. 说些他不好的事情
[14:22] – I only bench 250 pounds. – Nobody’s discussing benching. -我只能举起250磅 -没人关心这个
[14:26] – Stu… – Do what you gotta do, Tim. -司徒 -做你该做的 小炯
[14:28] He kind of jerks off in his cubicle early in the morning. 他一大早会在他小隔间里手淫一下
[14:32] Oh, I know that. I’ve walked by. 我知道 我正好经过
[14:34] – I haven’t made that a secret. – Everybody knows that. -我没把那当做秘密 -所有人都知道
[14:36] Oh, really? You’re comfortable with everyone knowing that? 真的吗 所有人知道你也没事吗
[14:38] That’s all I’ve got. 我只知道这些
[14:39] Okay, then you’ve got to pick two people and fire them. 好吧 那你就选俩人解雇他们
[14:41] – Oh, no. – Pick two. -不是吧 -选两个人
[14:43] All right, how about Stan and…? 好吧 选斯坦和
[14:46] – What? Fuck you, man. – Gladys doesn’t do… -啥 去你的 -格拉迪斯没做什么
[14:48] – What? – What? What happened? -什么 -什么 怎么回事
[14:49] – Fuck you, Tim. Fuck off. – This is good. -去你的 小炯 滚蛋 -很好
[14:51] – More more more. Do it, give it. – I’m just saying. -再来 再来 吵起来 -我说着呢
[14:54] Why don’t you fire Stu? He sucks at his job. 你为啥不解雇司徒 他工作很差劲
[14:56] I resent that, even though it’s a fairly accurate statement. 即使这个叙述相当准确 我还是很愤恨
[14:59] – If it’s survival of the fittest… – Yeah, with what I’m benching. -如果适者生存的话… -我可是举重高手
[15:02] You want to see who’s fit, skinny Tim? 你想看看谁适合吗 皮包骨的小炯
[15:04] Let’s go down a little bit closer to the water. I’ll drown you. 咱离水近点 我要淹死你
[15:07] – You’re gonna drown me? – This has been so good, everybody. -你要淹死我 -这真是太好了 大家
[15:09] – This is awful. – Nobody’s fired. -太可怕了 -没有人被解雇
[15:11] – What? – Why did you make me do that? -什么 -为什么非得让我做
[15:14] I just wanted you to see what somebody’s capable of, 我只想看看一些人的能力
[15:16] so maybe you’ll look over your shoulder 也许你们会审视一下自己
[15:18] and you’ll work a little harder. 工作更努力一点
[15:19] Watch your backs, right? 都小心点
[15:21] You define douchebag. 你绝对是个讨厌鬼
[15:25] I hope you all enjoyed yourselves today. 希望你们今天都玩得开心
[15:29] We have some entertainment for your tonight. 今晚 我们为大家准备了一些娱乐活动
[15:31] Let’s give a big omnicorp welcome 让我们以最热烈的掌声欢迎
[15:32] to Kyle Zander the master of escape! 逃脱大师 凯尔·赞德
[15:35] All right! All right! 好了 好了
[15:37] Silence. 安静
[15:39] Welcome 欢迎
[15:41] to the most mind-blowing night 来到你们愚蠢人生中
[15:43] of your stupid lives. 最令人兴奋的夜晚
[15:44] As you’re about to witness, 正如你们将要目睹的
[15:46] Kyle Zander can escape any situation, 凯尔·赞德能在任何情况下逃脱
[15:49] just like you can escape any situation in business 就像你们在经商重通过撒谎或是责怪他人
[15:51] by lying or blaming others. 而逃脱一样
[15:54] Note the corporate tie-in. 记下公司的搭卖广告
[15:56] Yes, Kyle Zander can fulfill a contract. 是的 凯尔·赞德能执行这个合同
[15:59] Observe! 请注意
[16:00] There’s nothing up my sleeves, 我袖子里啥都没有吧
[16:02] Only… see that? 只有… 看到了吗
[16:04] I had something up my sleeve. 我袖子里有东西出现了
[16:06] There were two fucking doves up there… 有两只操蛋的鸽子飞出来了
[16:09] Birds! I just stood there 一群傻B 我就站在这儿
[16:11] and I lied to your fat faces. 在你们的大脸面前 把你们骗了
[16:14] – I don’t find him to be very inspirational. – No. -我并不觉得表演很鼓舞人心 -是的
[16:16] Never trust anyone… that’s the moral. 别相信任何人 这是教训
[16:19] – In business. – And in life. -在工作中 -在生活中
[16:21] – Well, we have a business. – No, I understand. -我们有笔交易 -不 我懂
[16:23] I get the business aspect of it and why I’m here. 我深受这方面的迫害 所以我站在这里
[16:25] – I’m just reiterating. – Oh, I see. I’m sorry. -我只想重申 -我知道 抱歉
[16:27] and now for my first escape… 现在 上演我的第一次逃脱
[16:32] The death-defying tank of terror! 挑战死神 恐怖水箱
[16:35] I defy you, death, with my terror tank! 死神 我用”恐怖水箱’挑战你
[16:38] – All right.- Thank you. I accept your adoration. -好吧 -谢谢 我接受你的崇拜
[16:43] Thank you, young man, for joining me on the stage. 年轻人 谢谢你来到台上加入表演
[16:46] – What is your name? – Tim. -你叫什么名字 -小炯
[16:48] Tim is going to check the straps on my straitjacket 小炯将检查我紧身衣上的带子
[16:51] to ensure it’s on tight. 确保它是绑紧的
[16:52] Yeah, it’s pretty tight. He’s not getting out of this crazy thing. 是 非常紧 他不会逃出这疯狂的东西的
[16:55] – Pretty tight, Tim? – Very tight. -真的很紧吗 小炯 -非常紧
[16:57] – Is there any chance of escape? – Marginal. -我有机会逃出来吗 -几乎没有
[16:59] Would you say I will surely perish? 你是说我肯定会死吗
[17:01] Yeah, you’re gonna die in a few minutes. 是的 几分钟内你就会死
[17:03] Am I? Or am I going to blow your fucking minds? 我会死吗 或是让你们大吃一惊
[17:07] I’m betting on two. 我赌两块
[17:09] I’m going with the latter one. 我会相信后者
[17:10] I will now lower myself into the tank of terror. 现在 我会慢慢进入”恐怖水箱”
[17:13] Tim here will then lock me in 然后小炯将把我锁在里面
[17:16] – and swallow the key. – Oh, no. -并吞下钥匙 -不
[17:18] – You must swallow the key. – I’ve got a very narrow throat. -你必须吞下它 -我的喉咙很窄
[17:20] The key is wood, easily digestible. 钥匙是木制的 容易消化
[17:23] Just picture it as, like, a dude’s dong. Uh-oh, nailed it. 就把它想象成花花公子的鸡鸡 抓住它
[17:26] Inappropriate! Into the tank I go! 比喻很不恰当 我扎进水箱
[17:28] No, come on, I don’t want to… 拜托 别下去 我不想…
[17:30] – He’s in the tank. – Swallow the key, Tim. -他在水箱里 -吞了钥匙 小炯
[17:32] – Oh, no. – Swallow the key. Swallow the key. -不 -吞掉 吞掉
[17:36] Trying to get a chant going? 想要听首赞美诗吗
[17:37] Swallow swallow swallow. 吞掉 吞掉 吞掉
[17:40] All right. 好吧
[17:42] – That was more of a slurp. – Elegant. -听着真是吞咽声 -很优雅
[17:44] What’s this guy doing? 那家伙在干嘛
[17:45] Is he supposed to thrash like that? 他想像那样一直摇晃吗
[17:47] Help me! 救命
[17:48] That can’t be part of the act. Hey, Kyle. 那不是表演的一部分 凯尔
[17:50] Tim, get him out of there. It’s your responsibility. 小炯 把他弄出来 那是你的责任
[17:53] – Me? – You’re the one with the key. Where is the key? -我的责任 -只有你有钥匙 钥匙呢
[17:55] – The key’s in my stomach, Becky. – Take it out of there. -钥匙已下肚 贝基 -那就取出来
[17:57] – Shit out the key, man. – Shit out the key? -把钥匙拉出来 老兄 -拉出来
[17:59] – Shit it out. – I’m not… Stan, that’s gross. -拉出来 -我又不是 斯坦 太恶心了
[18:01] Shit it out in your pants and fish it out and unlock it. 拉在你内裤里 捞出来 然后把锁打开
[18:04] I’m not gonna take a dump on the stage. 我是不会在舞台上拉屎的
[18:06] Then break the glass. Do something, man. Shatter it. 那就把玻璃砸碎 做点啥
[18:08] All right, that’s a better idea. 好吧 这个建议更有可行性
[18:10] – That was it? – I punched the tank. -就这样 -我敲过水箱了
[18:12] No, you just slapped the tank. 不 你只是拍了一下
[18:13] I’m not slapping it, stan. I struck the tank. 我那不是拍 我重击了水箱
[18:15] – That was a bop at best. – A bop? -顶多算是打了一下 -打了一下
[18:17] This conversation is going on a little too long. 这个对话进行的有点太长了
[18:20] Here we go. All right, everyone back. 这样吧 所有人离远点
[18:21] Everyone back. 所有人退后
[18:25] Ohh, air! 空气
[18:33] Ohh, boy. 俺滴娘啊
[18:41] I’m just happy it worked out, you know? 问题解决了 我很开心
[18:43] You saved a guy’s life. And that, my friend, 你救了那人一命 而且我的朋友
[18:45] is a big bull’s-eye on the karma wheel. 是宿命之轮上的大船舵
[18:47] – The beginning of a new era. – Exactly. -新纪元的开端 -太对了
[18:49] What’s that? 这是个神马东东
[18:50] Hello! 你好啊
[18:52] – What’s he doing? – I am here -他在做甚 -我在这儿
[18:55] to serve you. 为您服务
[18:57] You are being sued 你正被
[18:59] by Kyle Zander, 逃脱大师
[19:01] Master of escape! 凯尔·赞德起诉
[19:04] Being sued? I thought he said everything’s good. 被起诉 我想他说过一切都好的
[19:06] I think you got the wrong guy. 你找错人了吧
[19:08] You are Tim. 你是小炯
[19:10] – Why are you talking like that? – You gotta stop the voice. -你为啥那么说 -别用这声音说话行吗
[19:12] I am being paid 他多花65块
[19:15] $65 extra 让我
[19:18] to use a magical voice. 用个魔法之声说话
[19:22] I wouldn’t call that a magical voice. 我可不叫它魔法之声
[19:23] Yeah, it’s really more of a vampire thing you’re going. 是的 这更像是吸血鬼之类的声音
[19:26] You have any vocal training? 你接受过什么声音训练吗
[19:27] Where does this guy work? I want to go talk to him. 这个人在哪工作 我想和他谈谈
[19:29] – He works… – No, just in a normal voice. -他在 -别 正常声音就行啦
[19:30] down in Chelsea. 切尔西工作
[19:34] It’s probably written down in the papers. 可能写在文件上了
[19:36] All right, I gotta pick up my kid from soccer practice. 好吧 我得去接我那上足球训练课的孩子
[19:39] And now I am gone! 现在 我要 走了
[19:45] I only had the one smoke balloon, so… 我只有一只烟雾气球 所以
[19:47] Yeah, the entrance was much more dramatic. 是啊 来的时候更加喜剧化
[19:59] Did you open the door with your mouth? 你用嘴开的门吗
[20:01] Yeah, I did. Do you want to ask if it was easy to do? 是的 你是想问这个简单吗
[20:04] – Was it easy to do? – No, it wasn’t. -简单吗 -不 简单个屁
[20:06] Do you have any follow-up questions, Helen Thomas? 你还有什么问题吗 海伦·托马斯
[20:10] You really need to get better at freeing yourself from those. 你真的需要让自己更容易逃脱
[20:13] So help me understand… why are you suing me? 我不明白 为什么你要控诉我
[20:16] I saved your life. 我救了你
[20:16] Well, because you also destroyed my career. 因为你也毁掉了我得事业
[20:19] My audience knows that when I enter a death-defying situation, 我的观众知道 当我进入生死两难的境地时
[20:22] I’m either going to escape or die trying. 不成功便成仁
[20:25] – So? – Now everybody knows -那又怎样呢 -现在所有人都知道
[20:26] that if I can’t escape, there’s no danger. 如果我不能逃脱 危险也不存在
[20:28] Some idiot on stage is just going to pull a lever and save me . 舞台上的某个傻瓜只会拉杠杆救我
[20:31] With all due respect, is the word really spreading? 恕我直言 真有流言在传吗
[20:34] I mean, you seem like 我是说 你看着像
[20:34] you do a lot of bar mitzvahs and corporate retreats. 做了许多受戒仪式和公司拓展活动
[20:37] I don’t see the buzz, really. 可我并未看到啥热闹的活动
[20:39] That didn’t even seem like some due respect. 这根本不像是什么冒昧
[20:41] Listen, I would love to talk to you more, 我愿意和你多说
[20:42] But I’m not really serious about loving to talk to you more. 但我和你说的愿意多说 并不是认真的
[20:45] And I’m gonna get in this trunk right now. 现在 我要进入这个箱子了
[20:46] What? Hey, get out of the trunk. 什么 从箱子里出来
[20:49] – Nope. – This conversation is not over. -不 -咱们的谈话还没结束
[20:51] It is. 结束了
[20:53] It’s a little passive-aggressive. 这有点被动性进攻
[20:55] A little? I was hoping for a lot. 一点吗 我曾希望是很多呢
[20:59] Are you still there? 你还在吗
[21:01] Please don’t sue me. All right, good talking to you. 请不要控告我 好吧 和你谈话很愉快
[21:03] – “Good talking to you”? – Just trying to be polite. -“谈话很愉快” -只是想礼貌点
[21:06] Don’t. Get out. I’ll see you in court. 不需要 出去 咱法庭上见
[21:11] Tim, this lawsuit is frivolous at best. 小炯 这起诉讼案件微不足道
[21:14] – It should be easy to win. – That’s great. -应该容易胜诉 -那太好了
[21:16] – Should be but won’t be. – What? Won’t or will? -应该但不会赢 -神马 会还是不会
[21:18] This Kyle Zander guy is a really compelling performer. 这位凯尔·赞德真是个引人注目的表演者
[21:22] – Eh, I wouldn’t say that. – Oh, I would. -我不那么想 -我是这么认为的
[21:24] And audiences all across America would. 全美的观众也都会这么认为
[21:26] I think he may actually be magic. 我觉得他可能真会魔法
[21:28] Are you a fan of his? You’re defending me, you realize. 你是他的粉丝吗 你要知道 你在为我辩护
[21:30] I’m just telling you like it is, buddy. 我正要告诉你 老兄
[21:32] I’m gonna take the wife to see this guy. 我要带我老婆去见他
[21:33] Look, having met you face to face… 和你面对面的
[21:36] – Yeah? – I’m concerned about… -怎么 -我在考虑
[21:38] How shall we say? The charisma gap. 我该怎么说呢 人格魅力的差距
[21:40] – What was the expression? – I simply cannot picture -什么意思 -我只是无法想象
[21:43] a jury liking you more than they like him. 陪审团会更喜欢你
[21:46] No, trust me, I’ll charm the pants off a jury. 不 信炯哥 我会把陪审团的裤子迷掉
[21:49] Ooh, I think you would charm the pants back on the prostitute. 我觉得妓女见了你都要从良了
[21:53] I can be charming. It’s no problem. Cool beans. 我可以迷人的 没问题 酷毙了
[21:56] Cool beans? Is that you trying to be charismatic? 酷毙 那就是你想做到的魅力超凡吗
[21:58] I can’t believe we’re talking about this. 真不敢相信我们在谈论这个
[22:00] The guy was screaming for help. That’s why I did what I did. 他在呼救 所以我才那样做
[22:03] – He screamed for help? – He screamed, “help!” -他呼救了 -他喊”救命”
[22:05] Did anyone else hear the guy? 还有其他人听到了吗
[22:06] Someone must have heard him. He was screaming for his life. 一定有人听到了 他在为自己的生命呼喊
[22:09] Okay, well, you find me a witness that heard it, 好吧 你给我找个听到呼救的证人
[22:12] and this is an open-and-shut case. 这个案子就简单了
[22:13] Cool beans. 酷毙
[22:15] No. 饶了俺吧
[22:18] All right, everybody, we have to try… 大家听好 我们必须努力
[22:20] Actually, boss, before we get into this meeting, 实际上 老板 在我们开会之前
[22:23] can I just address the group? 我能跟小组说点啥吗
[22:24] – You want to talk to everybody? – I have a favor to ask, yeah. -你想发言 -想请大家帮个忙
[22:27] – This is unusual. – Listen, guys, I was wondering… -真是少见 -各位 我想知道
[22:29] Okay, you’re doing it. You’re just doing it. 好的 你就说吧 大胆的说吧
[22:31] Some of you guys were sitting up close. 那天 你们有的人坐得很近
[22:32] Did you hear that escape artist yell for help? 有谁听到那个逃脱艺术家喊救命了吗
[22:34] – Why? – Yeah, why? -为什么 -是啊 为什么啊
[22:36] He’s suing me, if you must know. 如果你非要知道 他控告我
[22:37] And I need witnesses to back up my story. 我需要证人来支持我说的话
[22:40] – Fuck you, man. – Yeah, fuck you. -去你的 -去死吧
[22:41] You guys aren’t still mad at the beach thing, are you? 你们不是还在为沙滩上的事生气吧 是吗
[22:44] – We were all chuckling about that. – Nobody’s chuckling, Tim. -当时大家都在窃笑 -没人窃笑 小炯
[22:47] Yeah, number one… you have no friends; 是啊 第一 你没有朋友
[22:49] And number two… we’re all competing with each other; 第二 我们都在互相竞争
[22:51] And number three… I think you’re a b-hole. 第三 我觉得你是个屁眼
[22:54] You can say “butt,” if that’s what it’s short for. 你可以说”屁股” 如果屁眼是屁股的简称
[22:56] Let’s do it this way… I’ll give $200 这样吧 如果有人说
[22:58] to anyone who will say they heard the guy scream for help. 自己也听到那人呼救 我会给他两百块
[23:00] Oh, you know he’s not gonna pay the money. 得了吧 你们知道他不会给钱的
[23:02] – You can’t trust him. – Oh, enough. -不能相信他 -够了
[23:04] Please, I don’t know why everyone’s being so awful here. 拜托了 我不知道为啥这的人都这么可怕
[23:08] That retreat just brought out the worst in you people. 拓展活动把你们最糟糕的一面全部显露了
[23:10] What? It brought out the best in us, 什么 那选出了我们中最优秀的
[23:12] you wrinkled bag of crap. 你个满脸褶子的话痨
[23:13] – Perfect. – Sit down and shut up. -很好 -坐下 闭嘴
[23:15] Tim only fired you two bozo clowns 小炯解雇你们两个笨蛋小丑
[23:17] because he was forced to, that’s why. 因为他是被逼的
[23:19] Finally a voice of reason here. 原来理性的呼声在这啊
[23:21] – I heard that escape artist call for help. – Are you serious? -我听到那个逃脱艺术家呼救了 -真的吗
[23:24] I’d be happy to say so in court, sure. 在法庭上这么说我会很高兴
[23:26] Oh, Helen, you made my day. 海伦 你给了我美好的一天
[23:27] Give me a hug. 抱一个
[23:29] Sold your soul for a hug, Helen. 你为了一个拥抱出卖了灵魂 海伦
[23:31] Learned nothing from the beach. 在海滩上什么也没学到
[23:35] – Do I look okay? – Eh, you know. -我看着帅吗 -你知道吗
[23:38] You don’t build confidence 你没有树立信心
[23:40] Lladies and gentlemen of the court! 在座的女士们先生们
[23:43] I do apologize for being a little tardy. 我为自己迟到一小下而道歉
[23:45] – Inappropriate. – And I apologize for the way I’m dressed. -不合时宜 -并且为我的着装而道歉
[23:48] I just threw on the first thing that I had on the pile, 一堆衣服中 我只匆匆穿了一件
[23:50] including these shackles. What? 包括这个手铐 什么
[23:52] And I am myself. 我又回归了
[23:56] Don’t clap. Don’t clap. 别鼓掌 别鼓掌
[23:59] That’s the charisma gap I was talking about. 这就是我说的魅力差距
[24:01] All right, enough of that. 够了
[24:02] Oh, somebody knows about the charisma gap. 看来某人知道魅力差距了
[24:04] – I’m trying to teach him. – Can we do some deposing here? -我正努力教他 -我们能作证了吗
[24:07] Sure, yes. Mr. Zander… most entertaining… 当然 赞德先生 娱乐够了
[24:09] Why are you bringing this lawsuit? 你为什么要提起诉讼
[24:12] Well, this man Tim has caused 小炯这个人
[24:14] irreparable harm to my illustrious career. 给我辉煌的事业造成无可挽回的损害
[24:16] Mm, there was one other thing. What was it? 还有件事 是啥来着
[24:19] Oh, he also tried to bribe people 他还贿赂别人
[24:20] to testify against me in court. 在法庭上作出对我不利的证据
[24:22] – Wait. – That seems important, right? -等等 -很重要 对吗
[24:24] Tim, is he telling the truth? 小炯 他说的是事实吗
[24:26] The only person I tried to encourage a little was Helen. 我试图鼓励一下的人 只有海伦
[24:29] But she’s here for me, so… 但她是为我而来的 所以
[24:32] – Oh, Tim. – Yeah? -小炯 -怎么
[24:34] Actually, I’m here to screw you. 实际上 我来这是为了毁掉你的
[24:37] – What? – Did you really trust me? -什么 -你真的信任我吗
[24:40] It’s like you didn’t pay attention to those exercises we did at all. 你好像一点都没注意我们做过的练习
[24:44] You’re an awful woman. 你这个可怕的女人
[24:45] Another situation I’ve gotten myself out of. 又一情况下让自己脱身了
[24:47] Thank you. 谢谢
[24:49] – Thank you. – Oh, amazing. -谢谢 -太棒了
囧男窘事

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囧男窘事(The Life & Times of Tim)剧集台词目录:

在线阅读
S01E01
S01E02
S01E03
S01E04
S01E05
S01E06
S01E07
S01E08
S01E09
S01E10

在线阅读
S02E01
S02E02
S02E03
S02E04
S02E05
S02E06
S02E07
S02E08
S02E09
S02E10

在线阅读
S03E01
S03E02
S03E03
S03E04
S03E05
S03E06
S03E07
S03E08
S03E09
S03E10

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