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囧男窘事(The Life & Times of Tim)第3季第9集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计

Posted on 2024年7月13日 By jubentaici_movie_user 囧男窘事(The Life & Times of Tim)第3季第9集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计无评论
目录
S01E01
S01E02
S01E03
S01E04
S01E05
S01E06
S01E07
S01E08
S01E09
S01E10
S02E01
S02E02
S02E03
S02E04
S02E05
S02E06
S02E07
S02E08
S02E09
S02E10
S03E01
S03E02
S03E03
S03E04
S03E05
S03E06
S03E07
S03E08
S03E09
S03E10
时间 英文 中文
[00:10] *Now you’re looking at a man that’s getting kinda mad.* *小炯最近很抓狂*
[00:15] *I had lots of luck but it’s all been bad* *天天霉运一箩筐*
[00:19] *No matter how I struggle and strive,* *发奋努力白劳碌*
[00:23] *I’ll never get out of this world alive* *老天从来不赏光*
[00:27] *My fishing pole’s broke, the creek is full of sand,* *鞋儿破来帽儿破*
[00:31] *My woman run away with another man.* *女朋友都不要我*
[00:35] *No matter how I struggle and strive,* *发愤努力白劳碌*
[00:39] *I’ll never get out of this world alive* *老天从来不赏光*
[00:51] Look who brought a bottle of wine. 看看谁拿酒来了
[00:53] Hey! Yay, you made it. 好耶 你来了
[00:55] Hey. Everything looks great. 这真太漂亮
[00:57] – Oh, thank you. – Give me a hug, little lady. -谢谢啦 -来抱一个 小美女
[00:59] Oh, Tim. Seriously? 小炯 搞什么
[01:02] Seriously? What’s wrong? You don’t want a hug? 怎么搞了 怎么了 你不想抱一下
[01:04] My invite said semi-formal. 我请柬上明明说了要半正式着装
[01:07] Is that semi-formal? 这叫半正式
[01:07] Of course. I’m wearing my jacket. 当然是 我穿着夹克呢
[01:09] You’re wearing it over jeans and a T-shirt. 你穿了条破牛仔和T恤
[01:11] – Look around at everyone else. – That’s the look. -你看看别人都穿什么 -就要这范儿
[01:13] The look of what? Corey Feldman? 范儿毛啊 科里·费尔德曼样儿
[01:15] Didn’t you see the invite, bro? Semi-formal. 你没看请柬吗 老兄 半正式着装
[01:17] I saw it. I bought this jacket for the event. 我看见了 所以我才买了件夹克来派对
[01:20] – When? In 2003? – Yeah. -哪年代的派对 零三年的 -是呢
[01:22] Oh my God. 我天啊
[01:25] Nailed it. 吐槽成功
[01:26] I’ve seen you wear this outfit before, by the way. 顺便说一下 我以前见你穿过这个外套
[01:28] – Holy shit. – You wore this at my barbecue last year. -我靠 -我去年办的烧烤聚你穿得它
[01:30] You played wiffle ball in this outfit. 你还穿着这个玩过威浮球呢
[01:32] – Buddy, I remember that. – Julie. -兄弟 我记起来了 -朱莉
[01:34] You slid into home and did a poop in your shorts. 你溜进人家然后拉在裤裆里了
[01:38] Does anyone have a pair of pants I can borrow? 有没有人有多余的裤子可以借我穿穿
[01:40] Nobody has pants to lend me? 没人有多余的吗
[01:42] Why would people bring two pairs of pants to a party? 怎么会有人拿一条多余的裤子来参加派对
[01:45] I try. I try attend these things. 我努力了 我努力参加你们的活动
[01:48] I try to have fun. 我努力能找到乐子
[01:49] But you don’t try, Tim. 但你没努力 小炯
[01:50] I put the jacket on. I do the whole thing. 我穿了夹克了 我所有事情都做了
[01:52] Honestly, when I saw this pretty girl walk in, 说实话 我看见那位美女进来时
[01:55] I thought the taxi guy that brought her here was walking her in. 我以为她的的士司机陪她进来的呢
[01:58] Wearing an amazing blazer. 那司机还穿了个超帅的上衣哈
[02:02] Oh, Julie, you can suck my cock. 朱莉你个死贱货
[02:05] – What? – Oh hey. Sorry. -什么 -抱歉
[02:07] – What a party. – Yeah. -这派对真够呛 -没错
[02:08] – Hey, I’m Garvey. – Hey, Tim. -我叫加维 -我是小炯
[02:10] I’m on your side. A sharp jacket dresses up… 我站你这边 俗话说只要夹克帅
[02:12] …Any outfit. – It’s a bold choice to make. -全身都不衰 -这是个值得冒险一试的选择
[02:15] Without the jacket you’re just another homeless guy. 要是没穿这夹克 你就跟个要饭似的
[02:17] – But you know how to put it together… – Thank you. -但是你懂怎么搭配啊 -谢谢
[02:19] – …And look nice with it. – Thank you. -而且搭配的真好 -谢谢
[02:24] Yeah, I do. I’m a junior V.P., actually. 是 没错 我还是初级副总裁呢
[02:27] How old are you? Like 21? 你多大啊 有二十一
[02:29] – 25. – Are you like one of those geniuses or something? -二十五了 -你是不是那种天才之类
[02:32] – Similar. – Are you like a mensa genius? -差不多吧 -你是门萨俱乐部天才吗
[02:34] – Similar. – Wow, I didn’t -差不多吧 -我还真不知道
[02:35] know this was gonna be this kind of party. 这派对还能有你这种人
[02:37] Look, this might be presumptuous but, 听着 这可能有点唐突 但是
[02:39] would you be interested in doing a photo shoot for “GQ”? 你有兴趣让GQ拍套写真吗
[02:42] – You joking? – I am putting together a piece on the face -你开玩笑吗 -我正在收集年轻美国
[02:45] of young corporate America. 企业家的肖像
[02:47] Regular guys looking sharp, redefining business wear. 大众脸 犀利装 重新定义商业正装
[02:50] Just exactly like you are 就是你这个样子哟
[02:52] Right standing in front of me right now. 就是站在我面前的你哟
[02:54] It’s amazing. The best night of my life. 太好了 这是我这辈子最棒的一晚了
[02:56] Let me get your details and I’m out of here. 给我你的联系方式 然后我就闪人
[02:58] That’s fantastic. Here’s a card. 太好了 我名片
[03:01] Wow. People still have cards. 这年头人们还用名片啊
[03:03] – So cute too. – Hey, there you are. -确实挺可爱 -你在这啊
[03:06] Guess what? Yous truly here was just asked to pose for “Gq.” 猜怎么着 我被邀去给《绅士季刊》拍照呢
[03:10] Why-What? 为什么 什么
[03:11] – What do you mean? – Surprising turn of events, no? -你什么意思 -峰回路转 是吧
[03:14] Yeah, I’ll believe it when I see it. 是 等我看见杂志的时候我就信
[03:16] You will see it and you will believe it. 你会看见的 而且你也会相信的
[03:18] If you say so. 你要硬这么说也没办法
[03:19] Hate to say suck on that, 我不想说你去死吧
[03:22] But why don’t you suck on that? 但是为什么你不去死啊
[03:26] I just can’t understand why they’d be more interested 我真是不明白为什么偏偏选中了你
[03:28] in you than someone like me– handsome, accomplished. 而不是像我这样的 又帅气 又成熟
[03:31] They’re in for me this time. 这次他们对我比较感兴趣
[03:33] But you’re not “Good to look at.” 但你也不是什么五官端正的主
[03:35] A lot of people– a lot of people think I’m great looking. 很多人 很多人觉得我很帅呢
[03:38] Like who? List a couple. 谁觉得 列个名单
[03:40] I don’t have names off the top of my head. 人太多了我想不起来
[03:42] Just throw out a name. 随便说一个
[03:44] – Janet. – Who’s Janet? -简 -谁是简
[03:46] – Sue. – That name just kind of– -苏 -这名字有点
[03:48] People think I’m good looking. That’s the bottom line. 人们都觉得我很帅 这是底线
[03:52] Listen, it’s not to knock you. 听着 这不是打击你
[03:53] It’s just that the gist of the article 这只是文章需要的是
[03:55] is the face of young corporate America. 美国年轻职工而已
[03:57] They want guys who are skyrocketing to the top. 他们想拍的是蒸蒸日上的年轻人
[03:59] So you’re trying to suggest that I’m not young. 你意思我老了呗
[04:02] I mean I’m younger than you, wouldn’t you think? 我可比你显年轻哎 你不觉得么
[04:04] Can I just have permission? 我说头 你赶紧批准好不
[04:06] Yes, go. Do it. 好 批准啦 拍吧
[04:07] But listen, if they change their minds 但我说 要是他们不让你拍了
[04:08] I’ll be lurking awkwardly near the shoot at all times. 别忘了我 拍摄中途我会一直潜藏在周围哦
[04:11] I would expect nothing less. 早猜到了 你不这样都有鬼了
[04:15] This is happening. 真要拍了
[04:15] You’re gonna be in good hands. 放心吧 俺们摄影师很专业的
[04:17] This is Maxie right here. He’s gonna photograph you. 这位是马克西 他负责给你拍照
[04:20] And I’ll be around if you need me. 我就在周围 有需要叫我
[04:22] – Sounds good. – Yeah, break a leg. -很好很好 -是啊 祝你好运
[04:24] – So you’re Max? – Hey, shut it! -你叫马克思是吧 -我去 瞎叫什么呢
[04:27] It’s Maxie. You heard him say Maxie, right? 是马克西 他刚才说我叫马克西 你没听到么
[04:29] – Oh, I’m sorry. – Okay, so don’t call me Max. -哎呀不好意思 -没事 记住就行了
[04:31] Max is a name for, like, butchers. 一般来说屠夫才叫马克思呢
[04:33] – Oh. – Or like a dog you see on the street -这样 -要不就是那些随地大小便
[04:35] that somebody’s yelling at for taking a shit all over the place. 人见人厌的狗
[04:38] Wow. Maxie it is. 天 那必须叫马克西了
[04:39] So which one of these outfits is speaking to you, Tim? 那么 这几身衣服里你中意哪件呢 小炯
[04:42] I was gonna say something. 我正要说呢
[04:43] None of these are really my style. 这几件其实都不是我的风格
[04:45] Oh, I’m sorry. Oh my god, did I mess up? 真对不起 我是不是搞砸了
[04:48] – Are you gonna insult me? – No. -你是想侮辱我么 -不是
[04:50] – I can see it coming. – It’s just I didn’t realize when you came in here -我都感觉到了 -我就是没想到 你竟然觉得
[04:53] in, like, dollar a pound clothes 你进来时穿的这一身廉价品
[04:56] that that was something you thought was style. 还和风格这词沾边
[04:58] I’m just saying I can’t pull off some of these looks. 我不过是说 我这形象一时也转变不了
[05:00] Tim, I’m about to do you 小炯 我要帮你个大忙
[05:01] the biggest favor in your whole life. 你就好好感谢我吧
[05:02] – Oh really? – Yup. – What are you doing? -真的吗 -必须的 -你要作甚
[05:04] – Trust me. – Hey, no no. Please. -相信我喽 -喂 别这样 拜托
[05:05] Say goodbye to the old you, Tim. 和过去的你说再见吧 小炯
[05:07] – Oh no! – Boom! -别啊 -我冲
[05:12] It would have been better 要是被厕所水冲下去
[05:13] if the clothes had gone down the toilet. 就更给力了哎
[05:15] – You get the point. – Do I? -总之你明白了 -我明白了么
[05:16] Here we go, Tim. This is the new secret weapon 好了 小炯 今后的时尚大战中
[05:19] of your fashion arsenal– a chunky scarf. 你将拥有一件新的秘密武器 厚围巾
[05:22] Chunky scarf? I can’t wear a chunky scarf. 厚围巾 我可不戴
[05:25] – Chunky scarf. – They’re gonna make fun of me. -听我的 -要被别人笑话的
[05:27] Shut your stupid face hole and put this chunky scarf on. 闭上你的臭嘴 把厚围巾给我戴上
[05:32] All right, guys. You look a little bit more 好了 大伙 我知道你们
[05:34] confused than normal. Let me explain. 都很困惑 我来解释一下
[05:36] “GQ” Is here. There’s a photo shoot. 《绅士季刊》要来这里拍照
[05:38] – Everybody cooperate. – What are they photographing? -还请大家配合 -他们要拍什么呢
[05:41] There’s really no better way to say this– 可能大家都不会相信
[05:43] – Tim. – Tim? -拍的是小炯 -小炯么
[05:45] – Tim. – That’s bullshit. -小炯 -这不瞎扯淡呢
[05:46] – I know. – He’s the worst dressed person here. -是啊 -咱公司最邋遢的就是他了
[05:48] Stan, I have it duly noted. 司徒 这点咱都心知肚明了
[05:51] Seriously. I mean I’m friends with the guy, 说真的 虽然我是他的朋友
[05:52] but “GQ”? Come on. 可让他拍《绅士季刊》 快算了吧
[05:54] Hey. 嘿
[05:56] – Wow. – Whoa. -哇塞 -哇
[05:57] Wow good or wow bad? 是好看不好看咩
[05:59] Tim, you look great. 小炯 你这身超赞啊
[06:01] Nice. You’re not gonna make fun of the scarf? 那就好 你是想拿我这围巾打趣么
[06:04] No, I was actually going to the pants. 没有啊 我是想说说你的裤子
[06:06] Your butt looks really good in those. 衬得你臀型很好嘛
[06:07] – Looks nice? – Super flattering. -不错么 -那是相当衬了
[06:09] – Nice curve to it? – Yeah, I like the way it cups. -很有曲线喽 -是啊 提臀效果很好
[06:11] I’d cook muffins for you. 迷死我了 真想给你做松饼
[06:13] Is that a euphemism? 这是委婉语么
[06:14] I would do Reverse Asian Cowgirl 我真想就地和你用
[06:15] with you right now. 日本AV里的背叠式爽一把
[06:18] Took it a little far, but this is exciting. 虽然过火了点 但这么说我这身不错喽
[06:19] All right, let’s shoot this. 好喽 我们拍吧
[06:23] How’s this? How’s this? 这样摆吗 还是这样
[06:24] – Tim, okay. Look… – You getting what you need? -小炯 我说 -是不要拍完了
[06:27] – No, Tim, I’m not. – You like this? -不 小炯 没完呢 -这个动作怎样
[06:28] Because every time I take a 我每次一按动快板
[06:29] picture of you it looks like you just had a fart 相片里的你就像刚放完屁
[06:31] and you think something wet came out. Okay? 整得小便失禁一样 知道不
[06:33] That’s the face you’re making. 你的表情就给我这感觉
[06:35] You don’t like the hands-in-the-pockets pose? 不喜欢我手插兜么
[06:36] I don’t like the hands in the pockets, 我不喜欢你手插兜
[06:37] I don’t like the clenched butt, 不喜欢你的紧臀
[06:39] I don’t like how much you’re sweating. 也不喜欢你汗流不止
[06:40] I’m gonna be honest with you, Tim. 咱就跟你老实讲了 小炯
[06:41] – Where is your confidence? – What do you mean? -你的信心都哪儿去了 -啥意思
[06:43] Right now you look like you’re 你现在的样子就跟正在目睹
[06:44] watching your girlfriend fuck the drummer from Bon Jovi. 你的女友与邦乔维乐队的鼓手翻云覆雨一样
[06:47] – Tico Torres? – Yes. -你说蒂科·托里斯么 -对
[06:48] Why him in particular? 为啥一定是他呢
[06:50] Excuse me. I’m really sorry to interject here, 不好意思 我打断一下
[06:52] but I’m a confident, handsome, very young man. 我可是个自信 英俊 年轻无比的男人哦
[06:55] – You, sir, are perfect. – Excuse me? -太完美了 先生 就是你了 -干吗啊
[06:57] Take off that jacket and you sit in the chair. 请你把夹克脱掉 坐在椅子上
[07:00] All right, why not? I mean I like modeling. 好 有啥呢 我很喜欢当模特的
[07:02] What’s going on here? 怎么回事咩
[07:03] This is the scenario, okay, Tim? 我们来模拟个情景 知道了吧 小炯
[07:05] Sir, you are the incompetent employee. 先生 你是位不称职的员工
[07:06] Tim, I want you to scream at him, okay? 小炯 你冲他吼叫 好不
[07:09] – Right into his stupid face. – Okay. -对着他这张蠢脸吼 -好嘞
[07:12] I don’t think anybody necessarily would believe 没有人会相信
[07:14] that this face is stupid. 这张脸看起来很蠢
[07:15] Everything that comes out of it sounds stupid. 反正顶着这张脸的人说的话都很蠢
[07:18] – What am I– – Wow, met his match. -我怎么… -头儿遇上对手了
[07:20] Okay, so here we go. 好吧 现在开始
[07:21] Just roll with it, Tim. 跟着感觉走就行 小炯
[07:23] Just let whatever comes out come out. 想怎么骂就怎么骂
[07:25] Hey, you incompetent buffoon. 你这无能的跳梁小丑
[07:27] Yeah, this is good. This is good. 就是这样 很好 说得很好
[07:29] I ought to bend you over and ream you from behind. 我要让你弯下腰 在你身后攻城略地
[07:32] – Okay, that’s– – No? Too much? -这个嘛 -不好吗 过头了吗
[07:34] That’s taking it in a direction that’s a little weird. 这听起来就有点诡异了
[07:36] – Seems a bit excessive and derogatory. – Okay. -感觉有点过分 太侮辱人 -好吧
[07:38] Tim, I just want to say you’re doing great. 小炯 我只想说 你做得很棒
[07:40] Thank you very much. I feel confident. 非常感谢 我感觉很自信
[07:42] You look confident. 你看上去就很自信
[07:43] – The scarf looks good? – The scarf is amazing. -围巾很漂亮是吗 -围巾棒极了
[07:45] You know who wears a scarf like that? 你知道谁喜欢戴这种围巾吗
[07:46] – Who? – Tico Torres. -谁 -蒂科·托里斯
[07:48] Wow, Tim. 神啊 小炯
[07:50] He says you did a great job. You got past 他说你做得不错 你超越了那个
[07:52] looking awkward and ugly and came out of your shell eventually. 样子又蠢又丑的自己 不再固步自封
[07:55] That’s– I’m glad you came around, man. 那可真…我很高兴你能有此转变
[07:57] I honestly feel like a new man altogether. 我的确觉得自己由内到外焕然一新
[08:00] I can’t wait for my girlfriend to see me like this. 我迫不及待想让女朋友看看现在的我
[08:02] Well, you can’t keep the clothes. 这些衣服你不能占为己有
[08:04] Oh no, I’ve got to keep the clothes. 不 我需要它们
[08:06] – Those are expensive clothes. – Come on, Garv. -这些衣服都很贵 -拜托了 加维
[08:08] – Just come on, pal. – No. -高抬贵手吧 老兄 -不行
[08:10] Shortening my name doesn’t make it happen. 喊得再亲昵也没用
[08:12] Listen, can we just go over there and maybe take one more shot? 这样吧 我们能不能去她那再拍摄一次
[08:14] – At her office? – Yeah. -去她办公室吗 -是的
[08:15] It’s like an executive hailing a cab, 概念就是经理叫了辆计程车
[08:17] ducking into another office. 乘车直闯另一个办公楼这种
[08:19] Maxie, I believe I have you the whole day. 马克西 我想我得占用你一整天的时间
[08:21] No problem. Then let’s make this happen. 没关系 我们着手工作吧
[08:24] Tim, take your victory lap, champ. 小炯 胜利在望 再加把劲
[08:26] All right. Here we go, Max. 好吧 出发吧 马克思
[08:28] Do not call me Max. 别叫我马克思
[08:29] – I totally forgot. – I have asked you. -我给忘了 -我跟你强调过的
[08:33] All right, let’s get a shot over here for “GQ”. 好吧 让我们在这为《绅士季刊》拍摄吧
[08:35] And let’s get a few in the lobby for the “GQ” shoot with me. 我们先在大厅里拍几张
[08:38] – Tim? – Oh hey, Amy. -小炯 -嗨 小美
[08:40] – Oh, is this your office? – What are you doing here? -这是你办公室吗 -你在这干吗呢
[08:43] We’re shooting in different buildings around town. 我们在找不同的地方取景
[08:44] – Tim? – Oh, Julie. You’re here? -小炯 -朱莉 你也在这
[08:47] Yeah, I work with Amy. 是啊 我和小美是同事
[08:49] I forgot. I’m just so caught up in the fashion world. 我忘了 我正忙着跟时尚接轨呢
[08:52] – What are you doing? – Just shooting for “GQ.” -你在干嘛 -为《绅士季刊》拍照
[08:54] That’s happening? I thought you were kidding. 还真有这事 我以为你在开玩笑呢
[08:56] Do I look like I’m kidding with this chunky scarf around my neck? 瞧瞧我脖子上这厚围巾 像是开玩笑吗
[08:59] Tim, for once in your life, 小炯 你这辈子总算有一回
[09:01] you don’t look like a complete imbecile. 看着不像是彻头彻尾的傻子了
[09:03] Nicer ways to phrase a compliment, but thank you. 赞美的话也说这么难听 但还是谢了
[09:06] – What a great day. – Was it? -今天真是个好日子 -是吗
[09:08] – Yes. – I’m gonna need those clothes back now. -是的 -现在该把衣服还给我了
[09:11] I’ve got to go home and change, I guess. 恐怕我得回家换衣服
[09:13] – You flushed my clothes. – Was that you? -你拿我的衣服冲马桶了 -那是你吗
[09:15] – That was me. – Feels like forever ago, right? -是我 -感觉已经是历史了 对吧
[09:17] – I can just bring them back tomorrow. – Okay, fine. -我明天就还你衣服 -好吧 也行
[09:19] Here’s the card. Give them to Garvey yourself, all right? 这是名片 你还给加维就行了 好吗
[09:21] – Oh cool, just go to “GQ”? – Yeah. -酷 直接去《绅士季刊》总部 -是的
[09:23] Nice. That’d be fun to see the place. 太好了 在那肯定能大开眼界
[09:25] All right, don’t get weird. 好吧 别说这么诡异的话
[09:29] “GQ” is in a studio apartment above a deli? 《绅士季刊》竟设在熟食店楼上的单间公寓
[09:36] Garvey? Where am I? 加维 这是什么地方
[09:38] Oh, Tim. What are you doing here? 小炯 你来这干吗
[09:40] What am I doing here? I thought I was going to “GQ.” 我来这干吗 我以为《绅士季刊》在这里
[09:43] Here you are. 确实是
[09:44] Here I am? This isn’t “GQ.” 是吗 《绅士季刊》不可能在这
[09:47] I’m G.Q. Garvey Quantelbaum. 我就是GQ 全名加维·祖安特堡
[09:50] This isn’t happening. 这不是真的
[09:52] You told me I was doing a shoot for “GQ” Magazine. 你跟我说我是给《绅士季刊》杂志拍摄
[09:55] “GQ” What? 绅士啥
[09:56] – “GQ” Magazine. – “GQ” Magazine. -《绅士季刊》 -《绅士季刊》
[09:59] You thought I was talking about the magazine? 你以为我说的是杂志
[10:02] – Oh my god. – Oh my god. -神啊 -神啊
[10:04] Oh my god. This is not good. 神啊 这可不妙
[10:05] Why would you think I am a magazine? 你为啥觉得我是本杂志
[10:08] Why would you do this to me? Why would you ruin my life? 你为啥这样对我 为啥要糟蹋我的人生
[10:10] – I didn’t do anything. – Holy fuck. -我啥都没做啊 -他妈的
[10:12] You assume weird things. 是你自己想多了
[10:15] Wait, what is that? What is that? 等等 那是啥 那是啥玩意
[10:17] – Tim, I’m gonna be straight with you. – Okay. -小炯 我就直说了吧 -好吧
[10:21] – Okay. – But those files I stole are useless. -好吧 -但我窃取的文件毫无用处
[10:24] If you’ll give me an interview 如果你接受我的采访
[10:27] I’ll try to get you into 我就全力助你
[10:29] the hallowed pages of “GQ” magazine. 登上《绅士季刊》的封面
[10:33] See how I said that? 绝对说话算话
[10:35] I appreciate the clarity, but could you even do that? 不胜感激 但你有这能耐吗
[10:37] I have a lot of friends over there. 在那儿有我很多朋友
[10:39] – I used to work there. – Oh, really? -我在那儿工作过 -真的吗
[10:41] Yes, I worked there for a quarter. 是的 上了三个月班
[10:43] For a quarter of a year? 上了一个季度班吗
[10:45] Yeah. They break it up into quarters over there. 没错 他们是季刊
[10:49] So he says my picture could still possibly 他说 如果我跟他合作的话
[10:51] get in “GQ” If I cooperate with him. 我的照片仍有希望刊在《绅士季刊》上
[10:53] – What do you think? – Go for it. -你觉得咋样 -尽力而为吧
[10:55] – Really? – You don’t owe omnicorp anything. -真的吗 -你又不欠公司什么
[10:58] If I talk they’ll find out. They’ll kill me. 如果真相大白的话 他们会杀了我的
[11:00] They’ll never find out. You’re an anonymous source. 你是匿名参与的 他们永远也查不出你
[11:03] – You think? – Yeah, rule number one of journalism: -真的吗 -新闻界有个第一潜规则
[11:05] You can’t reveal your anonymous sources. 据一位不愿透露姓名的内幕人士说
[11:07] – I like that. – Do it. -我喜欢这个 -这就对了
[11:09] And plus, I’ve got to say, from where I’m standing, 还有我想说 从我的角度来讲
[11:11] it’s the socially responsible thing to do. 要做一个具有社会责任感的人
[11:13] Don’t pretend, okay, that you’re trying to do something good. 别装了 好吧 你在试着做些好事
[11:15] I’m part of the solution. I’m not part of the problem. 我喜欢雪中送炭 而不是落井下石
[11:17] – Tim. – And I look good doing it. -小炯 -我看上去是在做好事
[11:23] – Tim, is that you? – Hey, shh. -是你吗 小炯 -没错 别出声
[11:25] Tim, what are you doing? 小炯 你在干嘛
[11:26] Why are we in a parking garage in Brooklyn? 为毛我们要在布鲁克林的某个停车场接头
[11:28] I could have come to your apartment. 不是可以去你家吗
[11:30] What is this, amateur hour? 那这算什么 余兴节目吗
[11:31] Yeah it is. Why aren’t we in an apartment? 是的 为什么不去你家呢
[11:34] Lower your voice. Lean against something and let’s do this. 小声点 像这样斜靠着说话
[11:37] Oh boy. You want to dive into this? 孩子 我们来研究研究这个
[11:39] Let’s do it. You’re a very loud talker. 让你小声点 你声音太大了
[11:42] Omnicorp is closing the San Francisco office. 听说你们公司要关掉在旧金山的分部
[11:44] Are they outsourcing jobs? 那里是外购部门吗
[11:47] San Francisco? 旧金山
[11:49] I didn’t know we had an office there. 不知道在那儿公司还有个分部
[11:51] Where did you think the office was on the west coast? 那你觉得公司西海岸分部会建在哪儿
[11:55] Phoenix. 凤凰城
[11:57] I didn’t know we had one. I’m sorry. 我对此事毫不知情 抱歉
[11:58] – I’m making things up. – Phoenix isn’t on the coast. -我会弥补过失的 -凤凰城没在沿海
[12:00] Let’s go to the next question. Omnicorp stock– 下个问题 尽管你们公司错误地
[12:03] why does it keep rising even after failing 预测了季度收入
[12:05] to meet quarterly earning forecasts? 股价却持续上涨的原因是什么呢
[12:09] Why are the stocks rising? 为什么股价会上涨呢
[12:12] – I… – say it. -我… -说吧
[12:13] It’s the… didn’t know you 是因为… 老实说
[12:15] could buy stock in Omnicorp to be honest. 我不知道公司的股票还上市了
[12:17] Is this your way of getting out of the answer? 你是在转移话题吗
[12:19] I thought we were owned by Pizza Hut. 我觉得我们是必胜客的子公司
[12:22] You did not think that. You think Pizza Hut… 你说谎 你觉得必胜客…
[12:24] Omnicorp sounds like something smaller than Pizza Hut? 难道你们公司会听起来比必胜客规模小吗
[12:27] I could have sworn I read it on something. 我发誓我在哪儿读到过
[12:28] I saw it on some paper. 我在一些文件上看到过
[12:29] I think you ordered Pizza Hut one day 大概你是某天定了必胜客
[12:32] and it was sitting on top of one of your papers. 恰好必胜客的广告摊在了你文件上
[12:34] – That might have been it. – Hey, you know what, tim? -有这种可能 -小炯 你知道吗
[12:36] I think I’ve got everything that I need. 我们的谈话就到此结束吧
[12:38] – Everything? Really? – Yeah. -谈完了 真的吗 -没错
[12:39] I think I’ve got the full picture here. 我觉得我已经了解的八九不离十了
[12:41] So I’m gonna leave now. I’m gonna leave you 所以我就先走一步了
[12:44] to your Humphrey Bogart scenario 留你在这 独自享受
[12:47] you got going with yourself here. 亨弗莱·鲍嘉式的情节
[12:51] You want a sleek, slimming look. 你得穿得整洁点
[12:53] – No more pleats, okay? – No pleats. -衣服别那么皱行吗 -不穿皱的
[12:55] – No pleats. – Porque no pleats? -没错 -因为它不是皱的吗
[12:57] – Just don’t wear the pleats. – A sleek and slimming look. -就别穿这么皱的东西 -要穿整洁
[12:59] Yo, Timbo, you’d better come downstairs. 小炯孩子 你来楼下一趟
[13:01] – Yeah? What’s up? – Dude, your magazine is out. -什么事 -伙计 你的杂志出刊了
[13:04] He got me in “GQ”? That’s amazing. 刊在《绅士季刊》上了吗 太神奇了
[13:06] Uh no, bro. Not “GQ”. 不 兄弟 不是那个
[13:08] It’s some kind of corporate magazine with an article about you. 是本刊登了你的公司类杂志
[13:10] I was supposed to be anonymous. 我应该是匿名受采访的啊
[13:12] Yeah, Stan brought a whole stack and he’s passing them out. 没错 斯坦拿着一大堆杂志在发
[13:14] Unbelievable. I got to get down there. 难以置信 我确实得下去看看
[13:16] Dude, are you wearing mascara? 伙计 你涂睫毛膏了吗
[13:18] Mascara, no. 不是睫毛膏
[13:20] What is that shit under your eyes then? 那你涂什么鬼东西在眼睛上了
[13:22] Some people call it guyliner in certain circles. 某些圈内人士把它叫做男士眼线液
[13:26] It’s just… don’t even ask. 这只是… 当我没说过
[13:28] I don’t know what I’m doing anymore. 我也不知道我在干嘛了
[13:30] All right, hold on. 好的 各位等下
[13:31] Everyone put the magazines down. Stan, what are you doing? 都把杂志放下 斯坦 你在干嘛
[13:34] Looky here. It’s the douchebag of the hour. 看这儿 混蛋来了
[13:36] – Welcome, Tim. – That’s not who it is. -欢迎你 小炯 -那不是别人
[13:38] – You’re just in time. – I just want to apologize, first of all, -你来得刚刚好 -我要给上层领导
[13:40] – to upper management. – Hmm, that’s me. -道个歉先 -是的 给我
[13:43] I talked to the press. I hope there was nothing too sensitive. 我在新闻界发了话 话题不会太敏感
[13:46] I did not mean for the company to look bad. 不想让公司难堪
[13:48] Truth is, the company looks pretty good. 事实上 公司深受好评
[13:50] – Take it away, Stan. – What? -念出来 斯坦 -什么
[13:52] “The American corporate structure is fraught with corruption. 美国公司充斥着腐败的气息
[13:55] but during a recent investigation 但是最近我调查发现
[13:57] I discovered a more insidious problem… 暗藏着更为阴暗的问题…
[13:59] – Idiocy.” – is that the same as idiot? -愚蠢 -是和傻瓜一个意思吗
[14:01] “Meet Tim, a young V.P. Whose lack of loyalty 小炯 一位年轻的副总 他的不忠
[14:04] drove him to rat out his own company, 让他背叛了自己的公司
[14:06] but whose ignorance rendered him unable to accomplish even that. 可他无知到他连背叛也做不好
[14:09] I would, however, like to apologize in advance 不管怎样 如果结果证明这人
[14:12] if it turns out that this man is mentally retarded.” 是弱智的话 我愿提前表示歉意
[14:15] Mentally retarded. 弱智
[14:18] – Wow. – Disloyal and a simpleton. -哇 -不忠并且愚蠢
[14:20] It’s not a strong– it’s not a winning combo. 而不是强壮 这两个词不搭
[14:23] Can someone just give me some kind of compliment? 有人愿意夸夸我吗
[14:26] You look good in a scarf. 这围巾你戴的不错
[14:28] It detracts from the guyliner. 可是让你的眼线失色了
[14:40] I’ve got to say, these are great seats. 我得说 这座位太好了
[14:42] I’ve never sat in a part of the stadium 我从来没在体育场里
[14:43] where fat guys actually wear shirts. 坐在穿了衣服的肥佬周围
[14:46] They wear shirts, they don’t paint themselves, 他们穿了衣服 没在身上涂颜料
[14:48] they don’t spit on you. 不会朝人吐口水
[14:49] – Nobody’s hurling gay insults at us. – It’s amazing. -没人骂我们是基佬 -太棒了
[14:52] Don’t thank me, though. Thank the priest. 可别感谢我 感谢神父吧
[14:54] – He set this all up. – The priest hooked us up with these? -都是他安排的 -他安排的吗
[14:57] – These are free tickets from the priest. – Really? -这些票是神父送的 -真的吗
[15:00] Oh wait, hold on. This is him now. 等等 他发信息来了
[15:03] What does that mean? 这是什么意思
[15:04] “Come to locker room, bitches.” 来更衣室 小贱人
[15:07] Oh. You’re very good 你很擅长
[15:09] at text abbreviation deciphering. 破译文字缩写
[15:11] I spend a lot of time texting high school girls. 我花了很多时间给学生妹发短信
[15:14] Wow, we’re really in the bowels of the stadium. 我们真的进入了体育场的核心所在了
[15:17] This is like the underground railroad except everybody’s free. 像在地下铁路般 除了不用买票
[15:20] All right, perverts. That’s far enough. 好了 变态 不能再往前走了
[15:22] Pervert? No, we’re invited in. 变态 不 我们是受邀进来的
[15:23] You’re invited into the locker room? Yeah, right. 你们受邀进入更衣室 没错没错
[15:26] You guys are here to see a naked football player’s ass. 你们是来这看橄榄队员的光屁股的
[15:28] – What? – Why would we want to do that? -什么 -我们为什么要这么做
[15:30] You’re telling me you don’t want to lay ur eyes 你是在跟我说你不想瞧瞧
[15:32] – On the most perfect asses on the planet? – Both: No. -这世界上最完美的屁股吗 -不想
[15:35] Well-toned, fresh out of the shower and greased up with aloe? 新鲜出浴 具有芦荟水润质感的美臀
[15:38] Okay, this is an inner monologue for you. 这是你内心的独白
[15:40] – Look at that ass over there. – Oh wow. -看看那边的屁股 -哇
[15:42] Just look at it for another minute. 好好地看上一分钟
[15:46] Sounds like you want to see that. 貌似是你想要看
[15:49] Yeah, it’s more your thing. 没错 你更想要看
[15:50] I see it every week. 我每周都能看
[15:52] Don’t need to see it again. 不需要再看了
[15:54] – Hey, Timbo. – Can we come in? -嗨 炯宝 -我们能进去吗
[15:56] – Absolutely. – Do you mind if I come in, priest? -当然了 -介意我进去吗 神父
[15:58] – Oh no, Joe. – I could check the shower. -不行 老乔 -我可以检查下蓬头
[16:00] I know you really love to do that, but no. 我知道你很爱做这事 还是不行
[16:05] Lord, we know there are many atrocities in the world– 主啊 我们知道这世上还有许多暴行
[16:09] Children starving, poor people who have been 孩子在挨饿 破碎的酒瓶
[16:12] stabbed in the neck with a broken beer bottle. 刺进穷人的脖子
[16:15] But we ask, lord, that you put that out of your mind right now 但是主啊 我们请你把这些都抛之脑后
[16:17] and turn your attention to these wealthy millionaire athletes, 目光集中到这些身家百万的运动员身上
[16:21] the forgotten ones. 这些被遗忘的人
[16:23] Lord, in your name. Amen. 以主的名义 阿门
[16:27] All right, boys, go get ’em. 好了 小伙们 搞定他们
[16:28] Let’s go. Come on, hop to. 走 快点 跑起来
[16:30] Pretty sweet, huh fellas? 很贴心吧 伙计
[16:31] What are you doing exactly here? 你到底是在这做什么
[16:33] You’re looking at the 站在你面前的是
[16:34] team chaplain for the New York freaking jets. 纽约超级喷射机队的随队牧师
[16:36] – Suck on that. – Suck on it? -他们被我搞定了 -搞定了
[16:38] – Suck the big one. – They pay you to pray for the team to win? -搞定了这块肥肉 -为祷告而付钱吗
[16:41] No, I do it for the love of it. 不 我是因为爱才干这个的
[16:44] ’cause, you know, football is god’s favorite sport. 因为橄榄球是上帝最爱的运动
[16:46] – Really? I didn’t know that. – Yeah. -真的吗 我不知道耶 -没错
[16:47] – Pro or collegiate? – Both. -职业球赛还是大学生球赛 -都喜欢
[16:49] Anything where big money is involved. 只要有油水的都喜欢
[16:51] So what did you want to talk about? 你想和我们说什么
[16:52] Um, I need you to place a little wager for me. 我需要你们帮我下个小赌注
[16:56] – What do you think about that, boys? – What? -觉得怎么样 孩子 -什么
[16:58] – On what? – On football. Jets. -赌什么 -橄榄球 喷射机队
[17:00] Why don’t you just do it yourself? 你为什么不自己下
[17:02] Uh, hello. Team chaplain. 我是随队牧师啊
[17:04] – Insider information. – ’cause you know how they’re praying? -有内幕消息 -因为你知道他们的祈祷吗
[17:07] I know the prayers we’re coming up with. 我知道祷告词的内容
[17:09] Trust me on this, it’s not inside information. 相信我吧 这不是内幕消息
[17:10] No, trust me on this. Who’s the priest? 不 相信我吧 到底谁是神父
[17:13] – You. – Me. Thank you. -你 -我 谢谢
[17:16] – Can I say something? – Sure, talk. -我能说点什么吗 -当然 说吧
[17:17] You end way too many conversations with “Who’s the priest?” 你用”到底谁是神父”结束了很多对话
[17:21] Do you know that was the original title 你知道康熙来了
[17:22] for the Tony Danza show “Who’s the boss?” 本来叫做”到底谁是老大”吗
[17:24] – Who’s the priest? – He was a priest -谁才是神父 -他是
[17:26] and he cleaned Angela’s house. 他帮忙打扫安琪拉的家
[17:32] Are you– I’m confused. 我有点困惑了
[17:33] Is this a ticket store or are you the bookie? 这里是买票还的是赌钱的
[17:34] I was told you’re a bookie. There’s no sign that says bookie. 我以为你是买赌注的 标志上没说
[17:37] – What are you coming in here… – I’m here to gamble. -你来这儿干嘛 -我来赌博
[17:39] …And taking 20 minutes to say a sentence? 赌博的人会这么慢吞吞地说话吗
[17:41] – Are you the bookie? – Yeah, I’m both, okay? -你是卖赌注的吗 -两个都是
[17:43] Yeah, I took down the sign that said “Illegal bookie operation.” 我把那个”非法赌博”标志撤下了
[17:48] – Is that sarcasm? – Yeah, it’s sarcasm. -你在讽刺我吗 -正是
[17:50] I just want to place this bet 我想用这笔钱
[17:52] on the jets to win on Sunday. 赌喷射机队赢下周日的比赛
[17:54] Hey, Danny, shut the fucking door. 丹尼 把门关了
[17:57] You want me to leave it ajar or completely close the door? 留条缝还是全关
[17:59] – No, don’t close it. What’s going on? – Danny. -别关门 怎么了 -丹尼
[18:02] – What are we doing here with the door? – Shut it. -我们要关什么门 -关上
[18:03] – Okay. – What’s happening? -好吧 -什么情况
[18:06] The priest put you up to this, didn’t he? 是神父让你来赌的 是吗
[18:08] No, no priest. 不 没有神父这回事
[18:09] The envelope has church letterhead on it. 信封上有教堂的抬头
[18:12] Oh. There might be a priest involved. 也许是有这么个神父
[18:14] Listen, I honestly don’t think 我真的不觉得
[18:15] his prayer stuff counts as inside information. 祷告什么的算内部消息
[18:18] – Yeah, tell me about it. – He’s just praying he wins. -怎么说 -他祷告他能赢
[18:19] That guy’s been losing money to me 这家伙一直输钱给我
[18:21] Faster that a canadian in las vegas. 比加拿大人在赌城输的还快
[18:24] Canadian in vegas? Is that a reference? 加拿大人在赌城 这是出自什么地方吗
[18:27] Yeah, there’s been a whole movie about it. 有个关于它的电影
[18:29] “Owning mahoney.” Not a popular film. 《坐拥马哈尼》 不出名的小电影
[18:31] Understandable you would not get that. 你听不懂是可以理解的
[18:32] Listen, your priest buddy owes me 你的神父朋友
[18:34] a shitload of cash and I want it. 欠我一大笔钱 我想要回来
[18:37] All right, well, I’ll tell him you inquired. 我会帮你问一下
[18:39] We’re past the inquiring stage. 已经过了温和期讨债期了
[18:41] What stage are we at? 现在是什么状况
[18:42] We’re at the stage where danny cuts your cock off, 现在是让丹尼把你的鸟割下来
[18:46] cuts it in half and stuffs it in both your ears. 切成两半塞在耳朵里的时候
[18:49] – You’re gonna do that to me? – Not literally. -你真的想这么做 -不是真的
[18:51] – But I will treat you very badly. – Danny. -但我会残忍地对待你 -丹尼
[18:53] – Come on, I’m not gonna cut a guy’s dick off. – Danny, shut up. -我不会把他的鸟割下来的 -丹尼闭嘴
[18:56] Listen, we’re just the messengers here. 我们只是中间人
[18:57] Don’t shoot the messenger. 别伤害中间人
[18:59] – I’m telling you– – that is an expression. People say that. -我告诉你 -这只是个警告
[19:01] – Right, Danny, it is? – Yeah. -丹尼是吗 -对
[19:03] Just tell the priest I want all my money. 帮我转告神父我想要回所有的钱
[19:06] If it takes more than a week I’m gonna track you down 超过一个星期的话 我会找到你
[19:08] and beat you up in front of your girlfriend. 在你女朋友面前痛扁你
[19:11] Me? Why me? Why not Stu? 为啥打我 不打司徒
[19:12] Because there’s no way in hell he’s got a girlfriend. 因为他不可能有女友
[19:15] Look, I’m both hurt and relieved. 我感到又宽心又伤心
[19:19] Now if everyone will turn to page three 所有人翻到
[19:21] of their disposable prayer pamphlets, 可丢弃版祷告手册第三页
[19:25] you’ll notice I scribbled 你会发现
[19:26] a little something in there with a red sharpie. 我用红笔划了些什么
[19:29] Excuse me. 打断一下
[19:30] – What happened to the Bibles? – I’m sorry? -《圣经》去哪儿了 -什么
[19:33] – The Bibles. – Oh, the leather– black leather? – 《圣经》 -你说包着黑皮革的书
[19:37] – Yes. – Good question. -对 -好问题
[19:39] – Budget cuts mostly. – What? -经费缩减 -什么
[19:41] There are no more Bibles and 没有更多《圣经》
[19:42] no more starbucks in the kitchen. I’m sorry. 厨房里也没有星巴克了 抱歉
[19:45] What happened to the Jesus? 耶稣怎么了
[19:47] Did you sell the Jesus? 你把耶稣卖了吗
[19:48] Did I sell the Jesus to a Mexican pawnshop? 问我有没有把耶稣卖给墨西哥当铺
[19:52] What sort of ungodly question is that? 真是一个非常不虔诚的问题
[19:56] Well, it sounds like you sold the Jesus to a mexican pawnshop. 听起来你就是把耶稣卖去墨西哥当铺了
[19:59] People, you need to relax. 教徒们 放轻松
[20:01] Let’s– let’s– let’s pass around the collection plate. 我们现在来传递募捐盘
[20:03] That’s everyone’s favorite part of church. 这是大家最喜欢的部分
[20:04] Mary, hit me with some collection music. 玛丽 弹点募捐音乐
[20:07] Something upbeat, Mary. 欢快点的 玛丽
[20:13] So what’s the word, Tim? 你要传什么话 小炯
[20:15] The guy would not let me place the bet for you. 那家伙不让我下赌注
[20:16] Oh, you are kidding me. 你开什么玩笑
[20:18] Sounds like you’re in some kind of trouble. 你似乎卷进了什么麻烦
[20:19] Sounds like it? I’m in a cockload of trouble, tim. 似乎 我在麻烦的漩涡中呐
[20:22] – What’s going on? – God’s been testing me. -发生了什么 -上帝在考验我
[20:24] – Really? – Yes, like Job. -是吗 -像他考验约伯一样
[20:26] I bet and I lose. Then I keep betting 我赌钱我输钱 我继续赌
[20:29] and I keep losing just like Job. 我继续向约伯一样输
[20:30] Bet it all on black. Bet it all on black. 全压在输球的一方 全压在输球的一方
[20:32] Keep losing. Keep losing. 继续输 继续输
[20:33] I don’t think the Job story happened at a casino. 我不认为约伯是在赌场里接受考验
[20:36] Betting on black? 压在输球的一方
[20:38] – In Job there was casinos. – There was casinos in that story? -约伯传里有赌场 -故事里提到了吗
[20:40] Well, they would have rock pushing contests 他们有推石头比赛
[20:43] in the bible days. It’s really irrelevant, Tim. 在圣经的年代 这不算什么 小炯
[20:45] Listen, I just think you need 听着 我只是觉得你应该
[20:46] to pay this guy off and knock off the gambling. 还清债务 不要再赌了
[20:48] Oh, that sounds like a great idea, Tim. 听上去是个好主意 小炯
[20:50] – So do it. – Except that I can’t -那就别赌了啊 -可我是逼不得已啊
[20:51] ’cause I only have $8640, man. 我只有八千六百四十美元了 老兄
[20:54] Only? How much do you owe the guy? 只有那么点 那你欠他多少钱
[20:56] – More than eight grand. – Holy shit. -八千以上 -见鬼
[20:58] And a bit less than $39,428. 差不多三万九千四百二十八块
[21:00] What? 什么
[21:01] So here’s what I need you to do. 所以这就是我想让你做的
[21:02] No you don’t. 不行 别找我麻烦
[21:03] – I need you to take this money… – No no. -我想要你拿着这些钱 -别 别
[21:05] – …this Sunday… – Please. -…这个礼拜天 -拜托
[21:06] …and I need you to bet it all on the jets baby. …亲 我要你把钱全都押喷射机队
[21:08] – You’re not betting on– – j-e-t-s. Jets jets jets. -别都押 -喷 射 机 射射射
[21:12] – Say it with me. – I’m not gonna say that with you. -跟着我说一遍 -我才不要说这个
[21:14] – Say it. – Is this some kind of sin? -说嘛 -罪过啊罪过
[21:16] There must be something wrong with doing this. 这么做肯定是错的
[21:17] – Oh no no no. – So it’s okay? -不不不 -难道没错吗
[21:19] The lord says throw it down, man. 老兄 上帝都说了 扔了它
[21:21] – J-e-t-s. Jets jets jets. – There he is. -喷 射 机 射射射 -说得好
[21:27] I can’t believe you had jets tickets 真不敢相信你有喷射机队的赠票
[21:30] and didn’t invite me. 居然还不邀请我
[21:31] We thought you’d be busy. 我们以为你会很忙
[21:33] Yeah, you got that baby. 是啊 你还有宝宝要照顾呢
[21:34] The baby? Come on, I feed that thing like twice a day, 宝宝 我差不多每天都要喂它两次
[21:37] it crawls around the apartment. It’s like a cat. 它绕着房子爬来爬去 就像猫一样
[21:39] Babies aren’t like cats, Rodney. 大鲁 宝宝可长得不像猫
[21:41] Bro, this thing is basically a cat. 老兄 这东西本质上就是只猫啊
[21:43] Shoving its ass in my face all day, 整天拿屁股挤我脸
[21:44] Scratching my neck up– it’s a fucking cat. 拿爪子刨我脖子 就是只该死的猫
[21:47] What kind of baby is that? 那宝宝是何方神圣啊
[21:48] All I know is we need to keep the priest on our good side 我只知道如果我们还想要免费赠票
[21:50] if we want to keep these free tickets coming. 最好还是站在神父这一边
[21:52] I’m a little more concerned with getting beaten up. 我更担心的是会不会被毒打一顿
[21:55] The guy said he was gonna remove my penis 那家伙说他要切了我的老二
[21:58] and place it in my ear. 再把它插我耳朵里
[21:59] The way you phrase that is so much less impactful. 你的措辞一点也没冲击力啊
[22:02] – You guys want my advice? – Yeah. -你们想听听我的建议吗 -想啊
[22:04] No, fuck you both. Not giving it. 你们去死吧 不会给你们的
[22:06] Look, one thing is for sure: 听着 有一点是可以肯定的
[22:07] We cannot bet on the jets. 我们不能把所有的钱都押在喷射机队上
[22:09] – What do you mean? – The priest is on a losing streak. -你什么意思 -神父现在厄运连连
[22:11] We need to find a better bet. 我们得换个更有希望的队伍下注
[22:12] You know, something with better odds. 就是要找个赢面再大点的
[22:14] How do you find that? 你怎么找呢
[22:15] Well, Tim, you do have another in with the sports world. 小炯 体育赛事都有两支队伍的啊
[22:21] Oh no. 不
[22:22] Timmy! Timmy-do. 小炯炯啊 小炯炯呆
[22:25] Oh, I knew you’d come crawling back. 我就知道你用爬的也会给我爬回来的
[22:27] – I’m not crawling. – You about to. -我没爬 -你就要爬了
[22:29] Now shut your mouth and watch my fucking face. 现在给我闭嘴 你他妈好好看着我的脸
[22:32] Oh, it’s great to see you again. It really is. 很高兴又和你见面了 真的很高兴
[22:34] Timmy timmy-do-do. 小炯炯啊 小炯炯呆呆
[22:36] I missed these conversations. 我很怀念这样的对话
[22:38] Oh, oh wow. 哇哦
[22:40] Athletes are really comfortable getting naked, aren’t they? 运动员是不是真的都觉得赤膊很爽啊
[22:42] Oh come on, Timmy. We like family. 来吧 小炯炯 我们就像一家人
[22:44] If I toss pee in your girl’s face, 要是我把尿撒你女朋友脸上
[22:46] you can see my junk. 你就能看见我的阴道了
[22:47] That makes sense. I’ve got an issue here I need help with. 合情合理 但我有个事情想找你帮忙
[22:51] This may sound unethical, but I need to place a bet. 听上去可能是不太道德 但我要下注
[22:54] Oh, I’ll throw my next game. 下场球我会放水
[22:56] What? 什么
[22:57] You just give me a cut, Timmy. 小炯炯 你只要分我点钱就行了
[22:58] That wasn’t even a small dilemma for you, was it? 这一点也不会给你造成困扰吗
[23:00] Oh, trust me, little man, no one cares about these games. 相信我 小鬼 没人在乎这种比赛的
[23:03] – That’s– so you’re fine doing it? – Absolutely. -那 你答应了咯 -当然
[23:06] It’s like I always say, Tim, 小炯 就像我经常说的
[23:08] whoopee-doopee-doopee-damn-do. 傻人有傻福
[23:10] – You always say that? – It’s my catchphrase. -你总那么说吗 -那可是我的名言
[23:14] Thanks so much, Helen. This is great. 太感谢你了 海婶 真是太棒了
[23:15] You know what you’re gonna do? 你知道你该怎么做了吗
[23:17] Tell the man I’d like to bet $8640 跟那男的说 我要投注八千六百四十元
[23:21] against the Newark Wild Hogs. 赌纽瓦克野猪队输
[23:23] Exactly. And then what do you do? 非常正确 然后你再怎么做
[23:25] Then I get the fuck out of there. 然后我只要他妈的滚出来就行了
[23:27] You don’t have to phrase it like that, 你没必要那样子讲话
[23:28] but yeah, you leave quick. 不过你说的对 就是快点走掉
[23:30] Hello. I’d like to bet $8640 你好 我想要下注八千六百四十美元
[23:35] against the Newark Wild Hogs, please. 赌纽瓦克野猪队输
[23:38] – A woman’s basketball team? – Mm-hmm. -那个女篮 -是啊
[23:41] Why would you bet that much money? 你为什么要投那么多钱
[23:42] That’s a lot of money. What do you know? 那可是一大笔钱啊 你知道什么内幕吗
[23:44] – They are having a pretty good season. – Danny. -她们这个赛季表现非常好 -丹尼
[23:46] – Yeah? – Shut up. -怎么了 -闭嘴
[23:47] – Okay. – I’m gonna match your bet. -好吧 -我要跟你赌一把
[23:50] I’m taking my own money and guess what? 我会拿我自己的钱干嘛呢
[23:52] If the Newark Wild Hogs win 如果纽瓦克野猪队赢了
[23:55] and I lose the money 我就会输钱
[23:57] I’m gonna rip that shirt off you 我要把你那件衣服撕个稀巴烂
[23:59] and tie your tits together. 再把你的乳头打个结
[24:00] Holy moly. Imagine that. 我的天 想象一下
[24:04] I’m just asking everybody to take a moment and imagine that. 我要让每个人都来想象一下这个画面
[24:07] – Don’t ever say holy moly to me again. – Sorry. -别再跟我说什么我的天 -不好意思
[24:11] Oh, timbo, we did it. We did it, tim. 炯宝 我们成功了 成功了 小炯
[24:14] The game hasn’t started yet. 比赛还没开始呢
[24:15] – No, but god has performed a miracle, Tim. – Oh. -不是 不过上帝已显神迹了 -是吗
[24:17] The opposing quarterback is being brought up 对方四分卫受到
[24:20] on sexual harassment charges. 性骚扰指控
[24:22] He’s out of today’s game, Tim. 今晚比赛他要缺席了 小炯
[24:24] – It’s not a miracle. – It’s a miracle. -这不是什么神迹 -就是神迹
[24:26] – The sexual harassment miracle. – It’s a miracle. -性骚扰神迹吗 -反正是神迹
[24:28] -I have some bad news. – Oh. -我得告诉你个坏消息 -别吓我
[24:30] I didn’t bet the money on the Jets. 我没把钱押给喷射机队
[24:33] What? 什么
[24:33] I slapped it down on a women’s basketball game. 我全押给女子篮赛了
[24:38] I need to pray. 让我祷个告先
[24:38] – Dear lord… – Oh boy. -主啊… -别玩了
[24:40] …What has this fuck face done? …这傻帽做了些什么呀
[24:41] Don’t say fuck face in a prayer. 祷告用语文明点成不
[24:43] I know he’s one of your little children. A simpleton. 虽说这个傻叉也是您的孩儿…
[24:47] – No, listen, – But seriously, lord, -停 听我说先 -但我真心…
[24:48] I’m gonna cut off the prayer. 你祷告先停会
[24:49] I want to crush his skull. 想把他挫骨扬灰 主啊
[24:50] You’re gonna be very happy with me. 待会你就乐开花了
[24:52] I’m gonna be happy right now? 让我立马乐开花吧
[24:53] This is a sure thing if anything in life is. 不用急 这事十拿九稳
[24:55] Explain to me how it’s a sure thing, Tim. 那你说说怎么个十拿九稳啊 小炯
[24:57] I can’t explain. 无可奉告
[24:58] Just trust me. 你就放开了心相信我吧
[25:00] I’m gonna puke. 切 让我吐会先
[25:03] All right, let me put on channel 433. 好啦 转到433频道
[25:05] Do it. Do it. Let’s get to the game. 转吧转吧 赶紧看比赛吧
[25:06] Whoa whoa whoa. What the fuck? 诶诶诶 你他妈的怎么回事
[25:09] – Hey, sorry. – What are you doing? -抱歉哈 -干毛啊你
[25:10] What do you mean? It’s women’s basketball. 不干毛啊 就是看看女篮
[25:12] Yeah, exactly. 废话 我当然知道
[25:13] That’s the fucking New York Jets. 我们正看着纽约喷射机队比赛呢
[25:14] Give it a chance. Get to know the players. 就看一眼 这比赛可精彩了
[25:16] You’ll like it. 你一定会喜欢的
[25:17] Crazy night tonight in Newark, 纽瓦克今晚真疯狂
[25:18] a standing-room crowd of lesbians and sweatband fetishists 一群蕾丝边和汗巾控的拥趸
[25:21] to see the wild hogs cruise to an easy victory… 有幸见证了一场压倒性胜利
[25:24] – Oh no. – …In spite of the fact the fifth best player -天哪 -虽然这支队伍的
[25:27] on the team Tanya Miller opened the game 第五最佳球员谭雅开场便采用五个连续
[25:28] with five consecutive dunks on her own basket 乌龙灌篮自破家门
[25:30] before being benched and tested for drugs. 这名队员之后被罚下场并进行药检
[25:33] – Oh no no no. – Oh, this is not good. -怎么会这样 -糟了
[25:35] I’ve never seen anything like it. 本人生平 闻所未闻见所未见
[25:37] It’s unbelievable. 太不可思议了
[25:38] You’ve really got to buy tickets. 你们真得要来看看
[25:39] We need crowds for these games. 如此精彩 不容错过
[25:41] – Oh god. – She was supposed to throw the game. -天呐 -看样子她没比成赛
[25:43] We’re gonna lose the bet, huh, Timbo? 我们要当穷光蛋了 是吧 小炯炯
[25:45] It’s not looking great. I’m sorry. 貌似是 真不好意思
[25:47] I think I’m gonna go check into a motel. 我得去找家汽车旅馆住
[25:49] Yeah, we should all hide. 对 我们都得躲躲风头
[25:50] Good seeing you though, Timbo. 还是很高兴见到你 小炯
[25:52] – You know, as always. – What’s my name? -一如既往 -我呢
[25:54] – Bye, you. – Stu. -那你也 回见 -司徒
[25:56] – Okay. Good for you, friend. – The name is Stu. -知道了 朋友 -我叫司徒
[25:59] – That was a great brunch. – That was good. -这顿早午餐棒极了 -可不是
[26:01] – Western omelet. – It’s your favorite. -西式煎蛋卷 -你的最爱
[26:03] Not really, but I liked it there. 最爱谈不上 不过也还可以
[26:06] Oh my god, it’s him! 天呐 是他
[26:07] Amy, run! 小美快跑
[26:08] Shit, don’t do it. 求求你
[26:09] Don’t kill me. Don’t stab– 别杀我 别捅死我
[26:11] don’t cut my dick off. 别切掉我小鸡鸡
[26:12] I’ll get the money. 我会弄到钱的
[26:13] I’ll sell Amy’s jewelry. 我可以卖了小美的珠宝
[26:14] I’ll steal from her family. 再从她家偷点
[26:16] I know the passwords. 密码啥的我都有
[26:17] I found them once. 我以前弄到手过
[26:20] What are you doing up there? 你在那干嘛
[26:21] – Just waiting for you to finish. – Oh. -打算等你说完 -是吗
[26:23] – Are you gonna hurt me? – Oh, jeez, no no no. -你要弄残我吗 -天哪 不是
[26:26] I guess you haven’t heard the word then, huh? 我想你还没听到那些风声
[26:28] What’s the word? 什么风声
[26:29] – Yeah, the bookie’s dead. – He’s dead? -就是店主死了 -死了
[26:30] Yeah, a disgruntled customer stabbed him in the neck 有个顾客不爽就刺穿了他的脖子
[26:32] – and he bled out on the floor. – That’s horrible. -然后他就流血身亡了 -真恐怖
[26:34] It’s not so bad. He was pretty mean. 还好吧 他确实很卑鄙
[26:36] And all your debts have been forgiven. 你们的债务已经免除了
[26:38] I guess the big guy upstairs was looking out for you. 我想上面那老大一直在留意你
[26:40] – Are you saying god took part in the stabbing? – Yeah, god. -你是说上帝参与刺杀案了吗 -就是上帝
[26:43] I mean I’m not a theological expert by any means, 虽说我并不是个神学家
[26:45] But yeah, god made a stabbing happen. 但的确 上帝酝酿了一起刺杀案
[26:46] Wow, thank you for the– for the drop by. 真意外 多谢你…你顺道来访
[26:50] Have a nice Sunday. 周日愉快
[26:55] Does that require explanation 需要我给你解释下不
[26:57] or are you cool with what just happened? 还是你觉得这事无所谓
[26:59] *These shabby shoes I’m wearing all the time* *麻衣破鞋伴着我*
[27:03] *is full of holes and nails* *走过风雨许多年*
[27:08] *and, brother, if I stepped on a worn-out dime* *倘若踩到五角币*
[27:11] *I bet a nickel I could tell you if it was heads or tails. * *五分赌它正或反*
[27:16] *I’m not gonna worry wrinkles in my brow* *满脸褶子不用愁*
[27:20] *’cause nothing’s ever gonna be all right nohow. * *天掉馅饼是空想*
[27:24] *No matter how I struggle and strive* *发愤努力白劳碌*
[27:28] *I’ll never get out of this world alive. * *老天从来不赏光*
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囧男窘事(The Life & Times of Tim)剧集台词目录:

在线阅读
S01E01
S01E02
S01E03
S01E04
S01E05
S01E06
S01E07
S01E08
S01E09
S01E10

在线阅读
S02E01
S02E02
S02E03
S02E04
S02E05
S02E06
S02E07
S02E08
S02E09
S02E10

在线阅读
S03E01
S03E02
S03E03
S03E04
S03E05
S03E06
S03E07
S03E08
S03E09
S03E10

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