| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | -You know what I’ve been thinking about? -What? | -知道我正在思考什么吗? -什么? |
| [00:05] | The death penalty. | 死刑 |
| [00:08] | Really? That’s a very complex issue. | 真的 那事情可非常复杂 |
| [00:11] | So what are your thoughts? | 那你在思考什么 |
| [00:14] | Well,if you’re going to the chair, | 上电椅行刑前 |
| [00:15] | they got to give you whatever | 最后一餐无论你想吃什么 |
| [00:16] | you want for your last meal,right? | 他们都会满足你 对吗 |
| [00:18] | I guess. | 我想是的 |
| [00:19] | I’m gonna order cereal. | 那我会要 麦片圈泡牛奶 |
| [00:23] | Why? | 为什么 |
| [00:24] | ‘Cause if you keep adding milk, | 因为只喝牛奶 |
| [00:25] | you can make it last forever. | 剩下麦片圈再加入牛奶 就能一直吃下去 |
| [00:28] | And they just got to wait. | 他们也只能继续等 |
| [00:32] | Okay,let’s go back a bit. | 好吧 我们倒回去一点 |
| [00:33] | Why would you be going to the chair in the first place? | 为什么刚开始你就假设上电椅 |
| [00:37] | I don’t know. My DNA shows up at a murder scene. | 不知道 谋杀现场有我DNA残留 |
| [00:41] | Because it’s planted by a crooked cop or maybe one of my teachers. | 一个坏警察 或我某个老师故意栽赃的 |
| [00:46] | So you’d be wrongly accused. | 所以你被陷害了 |
| [00:47] | Story of my life,Dad. | 我总是命犯小人 老爸 |
| [00:51] | Remember that water pistol incident at school? | 还记得学校的水枪事件吗 |
| [00:53] | But that was your water pistol. | 但那确实是你的水枪 |
| [00:55] | Yes,but it wasn’t my pee. | 是的 但不是我的尿 |
| [01:01] | Morning. | 早安 |
| [01:02] | Oh,hey,how was your run? | 嗨 晨跑顺利吗? |
| [01:04] | Great.We made it all the way to the pier and back. | 好极了 这里到码头跑了一个来回 |
| [01:06] | Didn’t we,honey? | 是吧 宝贝 |
| [01:10] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [01:12] | Pier…back. | 码头…来回… |
| [01:15] | Hey,Jake, you ever seen anybody cough up blood? | 杰克 见过人咳血吗 |
| [01:18] | -No. -Then pay attention. | -没有 -那就注意看 |
| [01:21] | Ass. | 屁股… |
| [01:23] | Ass? | 屁股 |
| [01:25] | Kiss… | 吻… |
| [01:27] | my… | 我的… |
| [01:29] | sweaty… | 汗臭的… |
| [01:34] | I think I’ll jump in the shower. | 我要去淋浴了 |
| [01:35] | Do you want to join me? | 想和我一起吗 |
| [01:38] | Can’t. | 不能… |
| [01:40] | Later… | 过会儿… |
| [01:41] | maybe. | 也许… |
| [01:44] | All right. | 好吧 |
| [01:45] | Well,you drink your health shake, all right? | 那你把健康混合饮料喝了 |
| [01:47] | -You’ll feel better. -Doubt it. | -会感觉好点 -难说… |
| [01:54] | What’s in that? | 里面都有什么 |
| [01:56] | I don’t know. | 不知道 |
| [01:57] | Vitamins,minerals,protein… | 维他命 矿物质 蛋白质 |
| [02:00] | Whatever it is,it’s flushing out stuff I ate in high school. | 不管有啥 高中时吃的东西 都快吐出来了 |
| [02:06] | Hey,do you think they let you have | 嗨 你觉得 在你吃完最后一餐后 |
| [02:07] | a last poop after your last meal? | 他们还会让你最后拉一次屎吗 |
| [02:13] | what? | 啥玩意儿 |
| [02:15] | ‘Cause as long as you’re sitting on the can | 因为 只要你还是坐在马桶上 |
| [02:17] | technically,you’re still pooping. | 从技术上讲 你还是在拉屎中 |
| [02:21] | And they got to wait. | 他们也只能继续等 |
| [02:23] | Go get dressed. | 换衣服去 |
| [02:25] | If they made you hold one in, | 若不让你拉完就行刑 |
| [02:26] | that’d be cruel and unusual punishment. | 那也太残忍离奇了 |
| [02:33] | You know,I am impressed with what you’re doing here | 知道吗?我很佩服你现在的样子 |
| [02:35] | exercising,eating right, | 坚持锻炼 健康饮食 |
| [02:37] | laying off the cigars and the booze… | 远离烟酒 |
| [02:40] | I mean,Mia has really done wonders with you. | 米亚在你身上真是创造了奇迹 |
| [02:42] | -Yeah,she’s an incredible woman. -She is. | -是啊 她是个神奇的女人 -是的 |
| [02:44] | -And I’m a lucky guy. -You are. | -我也是个幸运的男人 -确实 |
| [02:46] | So why is there this little voice in my head | 那为什么我脑袋里老有个声音 |
| [02:48] | that keeps whispering, “Kill yourself! Do it now!”? | 一直在低呼”快自杀吧 就现在” |
| [02:53] | Don’t worry about that. It’s very common. | 不用担心 这很常见 |
| [02:55] | -Really? -Oh,yeah. | -真的 -是啊 |
| [02:56] | Every man who gets into a long-term, | 所有身处长期忠贞关系中的男人 |
| [02:57] | committed relationship hears that voice. | 都会听到那声音 |
| [02:59] | Mine sounded a little like Alec Baldwin. | 我听到的就好像亚历克·鲍尔温在说话 |
| [03:02] | I don’t know why. | 不知道为什么 |
| [03:04] | Maybe it’s ’cause I enjoyed him so much in that submarine movie. | 也许是我 太喜欢他那部潜艇电影了 |
| [03:07] | -What was that called? -Would you get to the point? | -叫什么来着的 -能不能只说重点 |
| [03:10] | you have to remember that over time | 要知道 随着时间的流逝 |
| [03:11] | that voice will fade, | 那声音会慢慢消失 |
| [03:12] | when you realize that | 当你认识到 |
| [03:13] | what you’re giving up is nothing compared to what you’re gaining. | 失去的东西和得到的相比 根本不值一提 |
| [03:16] | What exactly am I gaining? | 那我到底会得到什么 |
| [03:18] | Are you kidding? You’re gaining a soul mate, | 开玩笑吧 你得到了一个红颜知己 |
| [03:21] | someone to walk down life’s path with you,someone who’ll | 一个伴你走完一生的人 一个 |
| [03:24] | always be there sharing your hopes,your joys and your sorrows. | 永远陪着你一起分享希望 快乐 悲伤 |
| [03:28] | You got nothing. | 你可是一个也没得到 |
| [03:31] | It’s what the minister said at my wedding. | 这话是我婚礼上的牧师说的 |
| [03:37] | Hunt for Red October! | 《猎杀红色十月》[前面提到的潜艇电影] |
| [03:48] | Back in a while,honey. | 一会儿就回来 宝贝 |
| [03:49] | I’m going for a power walk. | 我去快走几圈 |
| [03:50] | Pace yourself. | 怎么舒服怎么走哦 |
| [03:52] | Don’t worry. | 放心吧 |
| [04:50] | This is a good pace. | 这才是彻底的”舒服” |
| [04:55] | Hey. | 嘿 |
| [04:59] | Whatcha doing? | 你在做什么 |
| [05:01] | Nothing.Close the damn door. | 没什么 先关了那该死的门 |
| [05:06] | You told Mia you weren’t gonna smoke or drink anymore. | 你和米亚说过 不再抽烟喝酒的 |
| [05:10] | Yeah,well,you told your father | 是啊 你也和你爸说过 |
| [05:11] | you weren’t gonna watch dirty movies on cable anymore. | 不再看有线频道的A片的 |
| [05:14] | Don’t change the subject. | 別转移话题 |
| [05:19] | Mia’s gonna be really pissed at you. | 米亚会很生气的 |
| [05:21] | Only if she finds out. | 她知道了才会 |
| [05:23] | And she doesn’t have to find out. | 她也没必要知道 |
| [05:25] | Well,I guess that depends. | 是吗?我想 这得看情况了 |
| [05:30] | What,are you blackmailing me? | 什么 你在敲诈我 |
| [05:32] | No.I’m just saying if you don’t give me 20 bucks, | 没有 我只是说 如果你不给我20块 |
| [05:34] | I’m gonna tell on you. | 我就告发你 |
| [05:38] | -That’s blackmail. -Oh. | -这就是敲诈 -啊 |
| [05:40] | Well,then,yeah. | 那就是了 |
| [05:49] | Hi,Mom,how are you? | 嗨妈妈 你还好吗 |
| [05:50] | Deeply hurt. | 伤透了心 |
| [05:52] | Is this about me or Charlie? | 你是指我 还是查理 |
| [05:54] | -Charlie. -Great. Come on in. | -查理 -太棒了 进来吧 |
| [05:59] | Can you explain to me | 你能否给我解释一下 |
| [06:01] | how your brother can be in a serious relationship, | 怎么你兄弟就开始玩真感情了 |
| [06:04] | and not only have I not met the woman, | 而且 我不但没见过那个女人 |
| [06:06] | he hasn’t even bothered to tell me her name? | 他甚至懒得告诉我她的名字 |
| [06:09] | Do you really need an explanation for that? | 你就真需要一个解释吗 |
| [06:11] | Do you want it to be about you? | 想我枪口掉转向你吗 |
| [06:13] | Her name’s Mia. She’s in the kitchen. | 她叫米亚 在厨房里 |
| [06:15] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [06:18] | Thank God I didn’t know Anne Frank. | 感谢上帝 幸好不认识安妮·弗兰克 |
| [06:24] | Hello. | 你好 |
| [06:27] | Hello. | 你好 |
| [06:33] | I’m Evelyn,Charlie’s mother. | 我是伊夫琳 查理的妈妈 |
| [06:35] | I’m Mia,Charlie’s girlfriend. | 我是米亚 查理的女友 |
| [06:37] | So we finally meet. | 终于见面了 |
| [06:39] | So we do. | 确实如此 |
| [06:42] | One question. | 一个问题 |
| [06:44] | I’m listening. | 我在听 |
| [06:45] | Can you fix him? | 你能帮他改邪归正吗 |
| [06:48] | I’m trying. | 一直在努力唉 |
| [06:55] | Jake.How about a hug for your grandmommy? | 想和奶奶拥抱一下吗 |
| [06:59] | No,thank you. | 不了 谢谢 |
| [07:13] | What the hell are you doing?! | 你小子在搞什么飞机 |
| [07:15] | Hey,hey,keep it down,keep it down. | 嗨 小声点 小声点 |
| [07:18] | Mia thinks I’m taking a power walk. | 米亚以为我出去快走了 |
| [07:21] | This is a sad,sad day. | 真是悲惨 悲惨的一天 |
| [07:26] | I always figured you’d be the last guy | 本以为”妻管严”三个字 |
| [07:29] | in the world to end up whipped. | 怎么轮都轮不到你头上 |
| [07:32] | I’m not whipped. I’m… | 我不是妻管严 我是 |
| [07:34] | considerate. | 考虑周到. |
| [07:35] | Considerate? | 考虑周到 |
| [07:37] | Yeah.See,I love Mia and I want her to be happy. | 是啊 我爱米亚 想让她开心 |
| [07:39] | And I happen to know she’s not happy when I | 但我碰巧知道 她会不开心 如果我 |
| [07:41] | smoke cigars & drink & gamble & stay out all nigh | 抽雪茄 喝酒 赌博 彻夜不归 |
| [07:45] | eat meat and sugar and grease and fat and… | 吃肉 高糖 高脂 重油 |
| [07:48] | nap and swear and wear shorts and bowling shirts… | 嗜睡 粗口 穿短裤和球衫 |
| [07:52] | Oh,Charlie,you ain’t just whipped, | 查理 你不止是妻管严 |
| [07:54] | you’re roped,saddled and gelded. | 你还套了嚼铁 架了马鞍 阉了小弟弟 |
| [07:56] | They could use you to give rides at kids’ birthday parties. | 可以去儿童生日派对 给人当马骑了 |
| [08:00] | I am not whipped. | 我不是妻管严 |
| [08:01] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [08:03] | Here,you might as well take one of | 既然你”卵袋”都没了 |
| [08:04] | these sacks since yours is empty. | 这儿许多”袋袋”你最好先拿一个 |
| [08:07] | Hang on a second. | 等一下 |
| [08:10] | That ain’t gonna do it,Alice. | 那没多大用的 爱丽丝 |
| [08:13] | What? | 什么 |
| [08:13] | You smell like a beer bottle that just fell out of Joe Camel’s ass. | 你闻着就像”骆驼乔”刚拉出来的啤酒瓶 |
| [08:18] | Well,what am I supposed to do? | 那我该怎么办 |
| [08:19] | Hang on, | 等等 |
| [08:21] | let’s see if I got anything in here that might mask your stench. | 看看有啥玩意儿 能盖住你的恶臭 |
| [08:25] | Oven cleaner? No. | 烤炉清洁剂 不行 |
| [08:28] | Tidy Bowl? No. | 马桶清洁剂 不行 |
| [08:30] | How do you feel about taking a whore’s | 要不来块臭奶酪 |
| [08:32] | bath with a hunk of bleu cheese? | 擦擦腋下和老二 |
| [08:35] | I’m so proud of him.He hasn’t had a drop of alcohol in weeks. | 真为他骄傲 几礼拜都没沾一滴酒了 |
| [08:39] | Well,that’s one way to go. | 嗯 是个办法 |
| [08:41] | But I’ve found that men who drink tend to talk less and sleep more. | 但我发现 男人喝了酒会变得少说多睡 |
| [08:46] | Which,frankly,becomes increasingly desirable as the years go by. | 老实讲 相处时间越长 你越希望他那样 |
| [08:54] | Oh,this can’t be good. | 噢 情况不妙 |
| [08:57] | Hello,darling.Wonderful to see you. | 亲爱的 见到你真好 |
| [08:59] | Hi,Mom. | 嗨 妈妈 |
| [09:03] | Have you been dusting? | 你刚打扫卫生了? |
| [09:05] | No,why? | 没有 为什么 |
| [09:07] | You reek of Lemon Pledge. | 你一身柠檬”碧丽珠”的气味 |
| [09:10] | You’re welcome. | 不用谢 |
| [09:17] | I’ll be downstairs. | 我在楼下 |
| [09:19] | No snacking,Charlie. | 不许偷嘴 查理 |
| [09:21] | We’re going to the best vegetarian restaurant in town. | 一会儿就去镇上最好的素菜馆了 |
| [09:25] | Oh,boy! | 喔 好哇 |
| [09:39] | Oh,thank God,meat! | 噢 感谢上帝 肉啊 |
| [09:41] | I love you,Rose. | 我爱你 萝丝 |
| [09:43] | I love you,too,Charlie. | 我也爱你 查理 |
| [09:45] | And may I say, | 同时我想说 |
| [09:46] | I would never try to change you the way she has. | 我永远不会像她那样改变你 |
| [09:49] | Her name’s Mia. | 她叫米亚 |
| [09:50] | I know what her name is. | 我知道她叫什么 |
| [09:51] | I also know where she lives, her employment history, | 我还知道她的住址 她的工作经历 |
| [09:54] | and if you want, I can get you photographs | 而且 如果你想要 我还可以给你 |
| [09:57] | of a wet T-shirt contest she entered during spring break,1995, | 1995年春假 她在校外”绅士蛙”酒吧 |
| [10:00] | at a college bar called Senor Frogs. | 参加凸点湿衫选美的照片 |
| [10:04] | I forgot who I’m dealing with. | 都忘了我面前的是谁了 |
| [10:06] | I also know you have to hide from her | 我还知道 你被迫躲 |
| [10:07] | just to smoke a cigar and slam back a warm beer. | 著她抽雪茄灌热啤 |
| [10:10] | What’d you do,bug my garage? | 你都做什么了 在我车库里装窃听器 |
| [10:12] | Don’t be paranoid. | 別乱想了 |
| [10:13] | I have a long-standing arrangement with Jake. | 我和杰克有个长期合作协议 |
| [10:16] | Charlie,I’m ready. | 查理 我好了 |
| [10:22] | I’m out here! | 我在阳台这儿 |
| [10:23] | Go,go,go,go,go. | 快走 |
| [10:26] | Okay,I’ll go. | 好吧 我走 |
| [10:27] | But I want you to remember one thing. | 但我要你记住一件事 |
| [10:29] | -What? -I’m not gonna wait for you forever. | -什么 -我不会永远等你的 |
| [10:37] | How do I look? | 我看起来怎样 |
| [10:52] | How’s your couscous? | “库斯库斯”好吃吗?[北非粗粒小麦粉 状如小米] |
| [10:54] | Yum yum. | 好吃 |
| [10:56] | You know,I had quite an interesting chat with your mom today. | 知道吗?今天和你妈妈的聊天很有趣 |
| [10:59] | Yeah,I’m sorry about that. | 是啊 让你受累了 |
| [11:01] | I know she comes on a little strong,but her heart’s in the right place. | 她是有点强势 但她也是出于好心 |
| [11:05] | If by the right place you mean in a cooler on its way to a dying man in Tennessee, | 如果你说的好心 是指雪中送”冰” |
| [11:08] | then we agree. | 那我同意 |
| [11:10] | You can’t possibly mean that. | 你不可以那么说 |
| [11:12] | I suppose not. | 我想我可以 |
| [11:14] | She’s too selfish to donate an organ. | 她自私得都不愿捐献器官 |
| [11:17] | Even one she doesn’t use. | 即使是她用不到的 |
| [11:19] | That’s so unfair,Charlie. You mother loves you. | 这不公平 查理 你妈妈是爱你的 |
| [11:22] | Really? | 真的? |
| [11:23] | Did she or did she not say I was a bitter disappointment? | 她有没有说 我让她失望至极 |
| [11:26] | -Well,she did,but… -And did she or did she not say | -她有说过 但… -那她还说没说 |
| [11:29] | that I’m a lazy-ass schlock jingle writer | 我是个懒惰蹩脚的广告音乐作家 |
| [11:32] | who wasted 13 years of piano lessons that she paid for | 把她和一群阳萎富豪结婚所挣的钱 |
| [11:35] | by marrying a series of men with large wallets and small penises? | 供我上了13年的钢琴课 都浪费了 |
| [11:39] | Yes,that was mentioned. | 是啊 她提到过 |
| [11:42] | But it’s only natural for someone | 但对一个爱你 |
| [11:44] | who loves you to want to | 并希望你有真才华的人来说 |
| [11:45] | see you live up to your potential. | 那是很自然的 |
| [11:47] | I mean,do you really want to be known as the guy who writes | 我是指 你真想成为一个 |
| [11:48] | songs about adult diapers? | 靠写成人尿片广告曲 而出名的人吗 |
| [11:51] | Hey,it’s better than being known as the guy who wears them. | 总比我把尿片穿在身上出名好 |
| [11:55] | Charlie,we both know you can do so much more with your life. | 我们都知道 你可以让自己过得更好 |
| [12:00] | Maybe, | 也许 |
| [12:01] | but you got to admire my restraint. | 但你得佩服我 一直隐忍不发 |
| [12:05] | Oh,come on, | 別瞎说了 |
| [12:06] | look how much you’ve accomplished just since we’ve been together. | 看看我们同居后 你生活质量提高了多少 |
| [12:09] | You’re exercising regularly, | 你坚持锻炼 |
| [12:10] | you’ve cut way down on the drinking and you’re eating right. | 不再喝酒 正确饮食 |
| [12:13] | Did you ever think you’d be able to change your life the way you have? | 你就从没想过 你可以改变现状吗 |
| [12:17] | Never. | 从没想过 |
| [12:20] | It just goes to show you can do anything you put your mind to. | 现状表明 只要你有心 万事皆可成 |
| [12:27] | I smell meat. | 我闻到肉味 |
| [12:30] | Excuse me? | 你说什么 |
| [12:32] | Your breath. | 你的呼吸 |
| [12:33] | It stinks of meat. | 有肉的气味 |
| [12:36] | Well,it-it-it could be my tongue. | 这个 可能是我的舌头 |
| [12:40] | My tongue is meat. | 舌头就是肉 |
| [12:42] | No,you’ve been eating meat. I can smell it. | 不 你吃过肉了 我能闻到 |
| [12:46] | Maybe it’s this breast of tofurkey you smell. | 也许是醬拌豆腐的味道 |
| [12:51] | No,I smell beef. | 不 我闻到了牛肉味 |
| [12:53] | -Where would I get beef? -You tell me. | -我哪儿来的牛肉 -你告诉我 |
| [12:56] | Well, | 好吧 |
| [12:57] | maybe it’s secondhand beef. | 也许是二手牛肉味 |
| [13:00] | What? | 什么 |
| [13:01] | You know,like secondhand smoke. | 你知道的 就像二手烟味一样 |
| [13:03] | Some thoughtless guy is sitting next to you eating a steak,and… | 一些无良的家伙 在你身边吃牛排 就会… |
| [13:10] | Ah,screw it. | 算了 越描越黑 |
| [13:13] | I paid a slightly disturbed woman | 我付钱给一个烦人的女人 |
| [13:16] | to toss a bag of bacon cheeseburgers onto | 在你换衣服的时候 |
| [13:17] | the deck while you were getting dressed. | 扔了一袋培根汉堡到阳台上 |
| [13:20] | Oh,Charlie. | 噢 查理 |
| [13:21] | Don’t “Oh,Charlie” me.I was starving. | 別说”噢查理” 我那会儿饿坏了 |
| [13:25] | And I’ll tell you another thing. My power walk | 还告诉你件事 我的快走 就是 |
| [13:27] | was two quick beers and a half a Cuban cigar | 缩在车库里 灌两瓶啤酒 |
| [13:30] | while cowering in my own garage. | 抽半根雪茄 |
| [13:32] | That’s why you smelled like Lemon Pledge. | 难怪你有柠檬”碧丽珠”的气味了 |
| [13:34] | Well,it certainly wasn’t to bring out the natural luster of my forehead. | 我当然不是用它给额头打蜡上光 |
| [13:37] | So you’ve been lying to me? | 那你一直在骗我 |
| [13:39] | If by lying you mean telling you | 如果”骗”是指 |
| [13:41] | I wasn’t going to do a bunch of things | 先告诉你我不会去做什么事 |
| [13:43] | and then doing them anyway and lying about it, | 然后都做了并瞒著你 |
| [13:44] | then yes,I’ve been lying to you. | 是的 我是骗了你 |
| [13:48] | Well,I suppose I can forgive you, | 好吧 我可以原谅你 |
| [13:50] | if you promise it’ll never happen again. | 但你得保证 绝不再发生这种事 |
| [13:52] | Oh,it’ll never happen again. You know why? | 当然不会再发生 知道为什么吗 |
| [13:55] | Because I am done with this whole charade. | 因为我不想再玩这种虚伪的游戏了 |
| [13:58] | I’m tired of you trying to make me over into something I’m not. | 我受够了你想要把我改造得 不像原来的自己 |
| [14:01] | I’m a grown man, not a work in progress. | 我是成年人 不是半成品 |
| [14:03] | -Charlie,people are staring. -Let ’em stare! | -查理 別人都在看我们 -让他们看 |
| [14:06] | You guys know what I mean. | 你们都知道我在说什么 |
| [14:08] | Why can’t women look at a guy | 为什么女人对男人 |
| [14:10] | for who he is instead of who they can turn him into? | 不是接受真实的他 而总想如何改变他 |
| [14:13] | -Please,you’re embarrassing me. -Well,good, | -请別说了 你让我难堪 -好啊 |
| [14:15] | maybe now you know how I feel | 也许现在 你知道我的感受了 |
| [14:16] | sitting in a restaurant eating medallions of | 坐在一家餐馆里 吃着 |
| [14:19] | bean curd with lawnmower sauce. | 一坨凹凸的豆子凝块 拌著杂草醬 |
| [14:22] | Am I right? | 我说的对吗 |
| [14:23] | No man should have to eat anything with the word “curd” in it. | 男人就不该吃”凝冻”状的食物 |
| [14:28] | Now,you’re turning into a real ass here. | 现在 你彻底变成一个真混蛋了 |
| [14:30] | Well,then I’m finally living up to my potential. | 好啊 那我终于展示出真才华了 |
| [14:33] | I’m a big ol’ bourbon-soaked, cigar-huffing ass, | 一个泡在酒里大吐烟圈的超级混蛋 |
| [14:37] | as God in His infinite wisdom meant me to be. | 就像贤明的上帝 希望我的那样 |
| [14:39] | As He meant all men to be. | 就像他希望所有男人的那样 |
| [14:51] | You guys are disappointing God. | 你们真让上帝失望 |
| [14:59] | Okay,what if a cannibal’s on death row? | 如果死牢里有个食人族怎么办 |
| [15:03] | I guess for being a cannibal. | 设想一下 作为一个吃人的人 |
| [15:05] | And he orders Chinese for his last meal. | 如果他最后一餐想吃一个中国人 |
| [15:07] | Does he get to eat a Chinese guy? | 他们会给他一个中国人吗 |
| [15:12] | No. | 不会 |
| [15:14] | What if they just electrocuted a Chinese guy | 如果他们刚电死了一个中国人 |
| [15:16] | and the cannibal was next? | 而食人族正好是下一个 |
| [15:20] | No. | 不会 |
| [15:22] | -He’d already be cooked. -Stop it! | -但那个中国人已经给电烤熟了 -够了 |
| [15:27] | -Hey. -Oh,hey. | -嗨 -嗨 |
| [15:28] | Where have you been? | 你去哪儿了 |
| [15:29] | I had a date with Mia. | 我和米亚去约会了 |
| [15:31] | That was two nights ago. | 那是前天晚上 |
| [15:33] | Yeah,well,I stopped off in Vegas on the way home. | 是啊 回来时在拉斯维加斯呆了几天 |
| [15:36] | Why? | 为什么 |
| [15:38] | Because that’s where you go after you destroy a relationship. | 因为那是结束感情后该去的地方 |
| [15:43] | Oh,now I understand why Mia’s been calling. | 喔 现在我明白为何米亚电话不断了 |
| [15:46] | She sounded pretty upset. | 她听着心烦意乱 |
| [15:48] | I didn’t tell her anything. | 我什么都没告诉她 |
| [15:50] | But you’d tell Rose,wouldn’t you? | 但你告诉萝丝了 是吧 |
| [15:53] | Hey,you just paid me once. | 嗨 你就给了我一次钱 |
| [15:54] | Rose has me on something called a retainer. | 萝丝请我当了她的资深顾问 |
| [15:59] | So what happened with Mia? | 那么你和米亚怎么了 |
| [16:01] | No big deal. | 没什么大不了的 |
| [16:02] | I just got tired of trying to be something I’m not. | 我只是厌倦了掩饰自己 |
| [16:05] | -A decent,healthy human being? -Pretty much. | -健康得体的男人 -差不多 |
| [16:11] | He’s back. | “他”回来了 |
| [16:13] | You’re damn right,I’m back. | 绝对正确 我回来了 |
| [16:15] | Mia and I are through. | 我和米亚结束了 |
| [16:17] | You schmuck. | 你这个蠢货 |
| [16:19] | She was the best thing that ever happened to you. | 她是你遇到的最好的妹纸 |
| [16:21] | But you said I was whipped. | 但你说我是妻管严 |
| [16:23] | I didn’t mean dump her. I meant grow a pair. | 我没让你甩了她啊 我让你强硬点 |
| [16:28] | What is “whipped.” | 什么是妻管严 |
| [16:30] | It’s when a man lets a woman take over his life and tell him what to do. | 是指男人一生 都被女人呼来喝去 |
| [16:33] | Oh,so like you and Mom. | 噢 就像你和妈妈 |
| [16:39] | No. | 不是的 |
| [16:45] | Oh,hi,Mother. | 嗨 妈妈 |
| [16:47] | Uh,no,no,Mia’s not here.He,uh, he broke up with her. | 不 米亚不在这儿 他们分手了 |
| [16:50] | Yeah,schmuck seems to be the general consensus. | 是的 骂他是蠢货 群众都意见一致 |
| [16:54] | What’s a schmuck? | 什么是蠢货 |
| [16:55] | Any guy who’s not whipped. | 任何不是妻管严的男人 |
| [16:57] | -She wants to talk to you. -Well,I don’t want to talk to her. | -她要和你说话 -我不想和她说话 |
| [17:01] | Nice catch,schmuck. | 接的好 蠢货 |
| [17:07] | Hey,Mom. | 嗨 妈妈 |
| [17:10] | Whoa,whoa,whoa, why am I the bad guy here? | 为什么这次我是恶人 |
| [17:14] | Well,did you ever stop to consider that maybe this wasn’t my fault? | 你就从没想过 错不在我 |
| [17:18] | I got to go,Mom. My meat connection’s here. | 不多聊了 妈妈 我的肉联厂长来了 |
| [17:24] | I just think if the guy’s got a front door,we should use it. | 我觉得如果有正门 就应该用它 |
| [17:28] | This is fine. | 这没关系 |
| [17:30] | -Hi,Charlie. -Hello,Rose. | -嗨 查理 -嗨 萝丝 |
| [17:32] | What’s going on? | 有事吗 |
| [17:34] | Well,I just wanted to introduce you to Gordon, | 嗯 我想给你介绍一下戈顿 |
| [17:37] | my new boyfriend. | 我的新男友 |
| [17:38] | Oh,no kidding? | 噢 真的? |
| [17:40] | -Hiya,Gordon. -Hello. | -嗨 戈顿 -你好 |
| [17:42] | Gordon and I are in a committed relationship. | 戈顿和我忠贞不渝 |
| [17:45] | Right,Gordon? | 是吗?戈顿 |
| [17:46] | Um,yeah,I guess.Look,see? There’s stairs right over there.Just… | 是啊 那边明明有楼梯的 就在… |
| [17:50] | Anyway,I was thinking that | 总之 我在想 |
| [17:53] | perhaps you and Mia would like to | 也许哪天你和米亚 |
| [17:54] | join us for dinner one night. | 可以与我们一起共进晚餐 |
| [17:55] | You know,double date. | 就像 双双赴约 |
| [17:58] | Oh,well,that’s nice,Rose,but I broke up with Mia. | 那很好 萝丝 但我和米亚已经分手了 |
| [18:01] | Oh,I see. | 噢 我明白了 |
| [18:04] | Well,then, good-bye Gordon. | 那么好吧 再见 戈顿 |
| [18:21] | I think I made a big mistake. | 我觉得 这次我犯了大错 |
| [18:23] | I know the feeling. | 我知道那种感受 |
| [18:25] | I once ate an egg salad sandwich | 有一回 我吃掉一个 |
| [18:27] | I left in my desk over the weekend. | 在课桌里放了一个周末的三明治 |
| [18:31] | Huge mistake. | 错大发了 |
| [18:34] | My relationship with Mia was the best thing | 我和米亚的感情 |
| [18:36] | that ever happened to me, | 是我遇到的最好的事物 |
| [18:37] | and I threw it away. | 但我 就这么扔了 |
| [18:39] | That’s what I should have done with the sandwich. | 就像 我应该扔了那个三明治 |
| [18:43] | I wonder if it’s too late to fix things. | 我不知道 是否还来得及挽回 |
| [18:45] | Call her and find out. | 打电话问她 |
| [18:47] | Yeah,but if I do, I’ll be right back where I started, | 是啊 但真打电话了 我又要重回到 |
| [18:50] | trying to be somebody I’m not. | 过去那种违心掩饰的生活 |
| [18:52] | Okay,then find another girlfriend. | 那么 再去找个新女友 |
| [18:54] | I don’t want another girlfriend. I want Mia. | 我不想要新女友 我想要米亚 |
| [18:57] | Then call her. | 那就打电话给她 |
| [19:00] | I can’t. | 我做不到 |
| [19:02] | I can’t live with her, | 有她 我活不下去 |
| [19:03] | I can’t live without her. | 没她 我也活不下去 |
| [19:05] | If your plane crashed in the Andes | 若你们飞机失事 坠落在安第斯山 |
| [19:06] | and she died,could you eat her? | 她遇难了 你能吃她吗 |
| [19:23] | Mia,it’s Charlie. | 米亚 我是查理 |
| [19:25] | Look,you win.I’ll change. No more meat.I promise. | 你赢了 我改 不吃肉了 我保证 |
| [19:32] | Come on,Mia,come out and smell me. | 来啊 米亚 你来闻闻 |
| [19:36] | Mia’s not here. | 米亚不在这儿 |
| [19:38] | Do I have to smell you? | 要我来闻吗 |
| [19:40] | -Who are you? -Ginger. | -你是谁 -简洁 |
| [19:42] | So,you’re Charlie. | 那么 你就是查理 |
| [19:44] | -Yeah.Where’s Mia? -Hang on a minute. | -是的 米亚在哪儿 -稍等 |
| [19:48] | She told me to give you this if you stopped by. | 她说如果你来了 就把这个给你 |
| [19:55] | She took a job in New York. | 她在纽约找了份工作 |
| [19:56] | -Why’d she do that? -Just read the note. | -她为什么那样 -你先看纸条 |
| [19:59] | “I love you too much to try to make you into something you’re not, | 我太爱你 不想再强迫你改变 |
| [20:02] | and I love me too much to settle for who you are.” | 我也太爱自己 不愿屈就於那样的你 |
| [20:06] | That’s the part that always makes me cry. | 这一段总让我感动得流泪 |
| [20:10] | I can change her mind. | 我能让她回心转意 |
| [20:12] | I’ll fly to New York tonight. Do you have her address? | 今晚我就飞纽约 有她的地址吗 |
| [20:14] | Come on in. | 进来再说 |
| [20:16] | -Can I get you something to drink? -No,thanks. | -想喝点什么吗 -不了 谢谢 |
| [20:19] | Yeah,hi.American Airlines reservations,please. | 嗨 请接美利坚航空订票处 |
| [20:21] | You sure? I got all my boys here. | 你确信 我的宝贝都在这儿 |
| [20:24] | Jack Johnny and Jose. | 杰克丹尼 尊尼获加 豪帅金快活 |
| [20:26] | Maybe a…poquito Jose. | 要不 来一点豪帅吧 |
| [20:31] | -Hey,are these actual baby back ribs? -Yeah,help yourself. | -嗨 这些真是烤猪排吗 -是 随便吃吧 |
| [20:34] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [20:37] | Yeah,I need to make a reservation for the red-eye to New York tonight. | 是的 订一张今晚去纽约的夜班机票 |
| [20:40] | Hey,do you mind if I turn on the TV? I got some money on the Lakers. | 能开电视吗?我在湖人队身上下注了 |
| [20:44] | You bet sports? | 你也赌球 |
| [20:45] | I’ll bet anything. | 赌任何能赌的东西 |
| [20:46] | I had 200 bucks on my sister’s pregnancy test. | 姐妹的怀孕检测结果 我都压了200块 |
| [20:50] | How exactly do you know Mia? | 你怎么认识米亚的 |
| [20:52] | Oh,we used to do the ballet thing together, | 以前我们一起跳芭蕾 |
| [20:55] | but I didn’t have the discipline. | 但我修为不够 |
| [20:57] | No kidding? | 开玩笑吧 |
| [20:57] | I still dance,but just for tips. | 如今我还在跳舞 但只为挣小费 |
| [21:01] | Huh. | 哦 |
| [21:03] | I’ll call you back. | 我过会儿再打来 |
| [21:08] | You know,I’m thinking | 知道吗?我在想 |
| [21:10] | -she probably needs her space. -Probably. | -可能她真需要自己的空间 -可能是 |
| [21:13] | Mind if I hang out and watch the game? | 我可以留下来一起看球吗 |
| [21:15] | Be my guest. | 请随意 |
| [21:22] | If you got cash, | 如果你有现金 |
| [21:22] | I could give you a lap dance at halftime. | 中场休息时 我可以给你来段”膝舞” |
| [21:28] | That’d be swell. | 那可太好了 |