| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:03] | So you’re not paying any rent at all? | 这么说 你就白住在这里? |
| [00:06] | Walden doesn’t want my money, we’re friends. | 沃顿不收我的钱 我们是朋友 |
| [00:09] | Wow. I can’t wait till I grow up and find a friend | 我太期盼长大后 |
| [00:11] | of my own to live off of. | 能找个可以蹭住的朋友 |
| [00:14] | That’s my dream for you. | 我对你的期盼不过如斯 |
| [00:17] | Mail’s here. | 有包裹 |
| [00:21] | Hey! | 嗨 |
| [00:26] | Uh, Walden, are you feeling okay? | 沃顿你还好吧 |
| [00:29] | Yeah, fine. Why? | 挺好的 咋啦 |
| [00:31] | Your junk’s all over the couch, dude. | 哥们 你的小弟弟在沙发上蹭呢 |
| [00:34] | Yeah, so? | 晓得 咋啦 |
| [00:35] | It’s my house, my couch, my junk. | 咱的房子 咱的沙发 咱的小弟弟 |
| [00:39] | Fair point. | 理由充分 |
| [00:41] | Remember, we’re guests. | 记得我们只是客人 |
| [00:43] | I thought we were friends. | 我以为大家是朋友 |
| [00:45] | What is this? | 包裹里什么 |
| [00:47] | Package for “Alan Smith” From “Penis Pump Industries.” | 阴茎充气泵公司寄给艾伦·斯密斯的包裹 |
| [00:52] | Nobody here by that name. | 没人叫这名字啊 |
| [00:54] | I’ll just… I’ll take this back to the post office. | 我退给邮局就是了 |
| [01:00] | Oh boy, perfect. | 该死的 |
| [01:02] | What? | 咋啦 |
| [01:05] | It’s my divorce papers from Bridget. | 布里奇特给我邮来了离婚协议 |
| [01:07] | Oh, oh, I’m sorry, man. | 真为你难过 哥们 |
| [01:08] | I remember getting my divorce papers. | 我还记得我收到离婚协议的时候 |
| [01:11] | That was a sad, sad day. | 真是个伤心欲绝的日子 |
| [01:13] | Remember, Jake? | 杰克 你记得吗 |
| [01:14] | I wasn’t with you, I was with Mom. | 我当时和妈在一起 不是和你 |
| [01:15] | She had a party on a boat. | 她在船上开了个派对 |
| [01:19] | You gonna be okay? | 你会好起来的吧 |
| [01:21] | Yeah, I’m fine. | 没事 挺得住 |
| [01:23] | I guess I knew it was coming. | 我就知道有这一天 |
| [01:24] | Well, that’s a very healthy attitude. | 你这种态度很健康啊 |
| [01:26] | Of course, I was hoping she’d change her mind. | 当然 我曾希望她改变主意 |
| [01:28] | But if I had hope in one hand and poop in the other, | 但是当你一手握着希望 一手抓着便便的时候 |
| [01:31] | guess which hand would be full? | 到底哪只手才握住命运呢 |
| [01:34] | The poop hand? | 抓住便便那只 |
| [01:36] | Bingo. | 答对了 |
| [01:37] | Yes. | 人才啊 |
| [01:39] | Well, my marriage is over. | 我的婚姻结束了 |
| [01:43] | Big deal. | 没什么大不了 |
| [01:44] | It’s only the final death knell | 这只是我生命中最有意义的一段感情 |
| [01:46] | of the most meaningful relationship of my life. | 敲响的最后的丧钟 |
| [01:50] | Bong. | 咣当 |
| [01:52] | That was a knell. | 这就是丧钟 |
| [01:55] | But you’re young. | 但是你还年轻啊 |
| [01:55] | I’m sure you’ll find someone else eventually. | 你总会和别人相爱的 |
| [01:58] | Yeah, yeah, I mean, sure. | 好吧 就是的 |
| [02:00] | It’s easy to find a soul mate. | 找到一个灵魂伴侣也不是那么难 |
| [02:01] | Heck, you practically trip over them everywhere you turn. | 反正只要你转下身就能遇到一个 |
| [02:04] | Oh, look, a soul mate! | 看啊 你的灵魂伴侣 |
| [02:06] | Oh, jeepers, there’s another soul mate! | 哦耶 又一个灵魂伴侣 |
| [02:09] | Everywhere I look it’s another soul mate. | 到处都是啊 又看到一个 |
| [02:12] | No, it’s a great day. | 真是个好日子啊 |
| [02:14] | It’s just another fabulous day in the life of Walden Schmidt. | 沃顿·施密特生命中美好的一天 |
| [02:26] | Dad? | 老爸 |
| [02:27] | Yeah? | 咋啦 |
| [02:28] | Please tell me I’m not done growing. | 我那儿还会长的吧 |
| [02:33] | Knock yourself out. | 这个送你了 |
| [03:11] | -Walden? -Yeah? | -沃顿 -咋啦 |
| [03:15] | What you doing? | 你做啥呢 |
| [03:17] | If I’m going to forget Bridget and start a new life, | 我要忘记布里奇特并开始新的生活 |
| [03:20] | I got to get rid of the old one. | 我要忘记过去 |
| [03:22] | Uh-huh. So, uh, so this is all… | 那这些是什么 |
| [03:25] | Wedding photos and love letters. | 结婚照和情书 |
| [03:28] | Right, right. | 了解 |
| [03:30] | Oh, this is from our second date. | 这是我们第二次约会买的 |
| [03:33] | “I am bananas over you.” | 我就是你的香蕉 |
| [03:35] | Isn’t that adorable? | 可爱不 |
| [03:38] | Burn in Hell, little monkey. | 去死吧 小猴子 |
| [03:41] | This– wedding video. | 这个是结婚的视频 |
| [03:45] | Honeymoon video. | 蜜月的视频 |
| [03:47] | Oh, maybe I’ll keep that one. | 这个我还是留着 |
| [03:49] | Listen, I understand that you’re very upset right now, | 我知道你现在很郁闷 |
| [03:53] | but there may come a time | 但是也许过一阵子 |
| [03:55] | when you’ll regret not having some of this stuff. | 你会后悔扔了这些东西 |
| [03:57] | You still have your wedding photos? | 你还留着你的结婚照 |
| [03:59] | Well, the half that she gave me. | 我老婆给了我一半 |
| [04:01] | And by half, I mean half of each picture. | 就是她剪开那一半给我了 |
| [04:05] | Yeah, well, I don’t want any mementos. | 算了 我不想要了 |
| [04:08] | In fact, I don’t even want to think about Bridget anymore. | 我一点都不愿意想起她 |
| [04:10] | I am wiping the hard drive. | 我要格式化硬盘 |
| [04:13] | Okay. I’m rebooting the system. | 我要重启系统 |
| [04:15] | -Whatever makes you happy. -And to really get a clean start, | -只要你开心就好 -我要一个新的开始 |
| [04:17] | I’m going to sell this place and move to New York. | 我要卖掉这房子 搬去纽约 |
| [04:19] | With the possible exception of that. | 这可就不行了 |
| [04:23] | Why? | 为啥 |
| [04:23] | What do you mean why? | 什么为啥 |
| [04:25] | If you sell the place, I wouldn’t be able to live… | 如果你卖了房子 我就不能 |
| [04:29] | …with myself. | 和我住在一起了 |
| [04:32] | If I didn’t encourage you to reconsider, | 我想你最好和专业人士谈谈 |
| [04:35] | and maybe talk to a professional. | 也许你会重新考虑一下 |
| [04:37] | Like a shrink? | 像心理医生那样吗 |
| [04:39] | This could all be a sign of clinical depression. | 你现在很可能是忧郁症的症状 |
| [04:42] | I guess you would know. | 你好专业啊 |
| [04:45] | If you’re interested, I could recommend a good psychiatrist. | 如果你有兴趣 我可以介绍一个心理医生给你 |
| [04:47] | The one that my brother used to go to. | 我哥以前总去那咨询 |
| [04:49] | Uh, your brother ended up dead. | 你哥可是挂了 |
| [04:52] | Well, yeah, that’s ’cause a crazy woman | 那是个疯女子搞的 |
| [04:54] | pushed him in front of a train. | 把他推下地铁站台 |
| [04:55] | You can’t blame his shrink for that. | 你也不能为此责怪心理医生啊 |
| [04:57] | If anything, blame the crazy woman’s shrink. | 要怪就怪那个疯女人的心理医生 |
| [05:01] | I guess I got nothing to lose, huh? | 那就死马当活马医吧 |
| [05:04] | I’m in. | 我去看看 |
| [05:05] | Okay. Well, I’ll go get her number. | 我去拿电话号码 |
| [05:08] | Geez, being a parasitic leech is exhausting. | 这年头蹭房住不容易啊 |
| [05:15] | I’m sure you’re aware that depression | 我确定你的忧郁 |
| [05:17] | is often the result of repressed anger. | 来自你压抑的怒火 |
| [05:20] | I’m not angry. | 我不愤怒啊 |
| [05:23] | Well, I got to tell you, Walden, | 沃顿 你听我说 |
| [05:24] | burning all the mementos and photographs from your marriage | 你烧了你婚姻中所有的纪念物和照片 |
| [05:28] | can be construed as an angry gesture. | 就是你愤怒的表现 |
| [05:31] | That’s not an angry gesture. This is an angry gesture. | 那不是我愤怒的表现 这才是 |
| [05:36] | That’s a good one, too. | 这个也算 |
| [05:39] | Why don’t we put your marriage on the back burner for now. | 让我们先不谈你的婚姻 |
| [05:41] | Let’s talk about your childhood. | 先聊聊你的童年吧 |
| [05:44] | I had a very happy childhood. | 我童年很欢乐 |
| [05:45] | Fillededith wonderful memories. | 充满了美好回忆 |
| [05:47] | Your parents still together? | 你父母还在一起吗 |
| [05:48] | No, and I don’t want to talk about it. | 离了 我不想谈这个 |
| [05:54] | All right, fine. | 好吧 谈就谈 |
| [05:56] | My first childhood memory | 我童年的第一个记忆就是 |
| [05:59] | was my father disappearing when I was three. | 我父亲在我三岁的时候消失了 |
| [06:02] | He abandoned you and your mother? | 他遗弃了你和你妈妈 |
| [06:04] | No, he disappeared. | 不是 他就是消失了 |
| [06:05] | He was an amateur magician and it was his signature trick. | 他是个魔术师 这是他的拿手好戏 |
| [06:09] | Oh. | 哦 |
| [06:10] | And then when I was four, | 我四岁的时候 |
| [06:14] | he ran off with a lady sword swallower. | 他和一个练吞剑的妞跑了 |
| [06:18] | At least that’s what my mother called her. | 这些都是我妈告诉我的 |
| [06:20] | In retrospect, it might have been a euphemism. | 现在看来 怎么都像是委婉的说法 |
| [06:25] | So what was your mother like? | 你怎么看你妈妈 |
| [06:26] | Well, after Dad left, she raised me by herself. | 我爸走后 她一个人支撑这个家 |
| [06:29] | And how was that? | 你感觉如何 |
| [06:30] | It was great. | 非常好 |
| [06:32] | She did everything for me. | 她什么都为我做 |
| [06:34] | And I always felt safe with her. | 和她在一起我很有安全感 |
| [06:36] | That sounds wonderful. | 听起来真不错 |
| [06:38] | It was. | 的确 |
| [06:40] | And the saddest day of my life was when it ended. | 我一生最伤心的日子就是这种感觉结束的时候 |
| [06:42] | Why, what happened? | 怎么了 |
| [06:43] | I got married. | 我结婚了 |
| [06:47] | Hello. | 成了 |
| [06:50] | How did your wife and your mother get along? | 你妈和你前妻相处的如何 |
| [06:52] | Not very well. I don’t know why, though. | 不太好 我不清楚为什么 |
| [06:54] | Maybe it was just ’cause they were so different. | 也许是因为她们是不同类型的人 |
| [06:57] | I see. | 了解了 |
| [06:58] | Tell me more about your wife. | 再谈谈你前妻 |
| [07:00] | Bridget? | 布里奇特 |
| [07:02] | She’s great. | 她很棒 |
| [07:04] | She did everything for me. | 她什么都为我做 |
| [07:05] | And I always felt very safe with her. | 和她在一起我感觉很有安全感 |
| [07:08] | Oh, isn’t that what I said about my mother? | 我刚才也是这样说我妈的 |
| [07:10] | Oh, Walden, you went and beat me to it. | 沃顿 你正中下怀 |
| [07:14] | I wonder if when we get right down to it, | 我觉得我们就要找到问题症结了 |
| [07:15] | I married my mother. | 我娶了我妈 |
| [07:16] | And we’re off. | 完事了 |
| [07:19] | What are we saying here? | 这是什么意思 |
| [07:21] | That Bridget’s right and I am emotionally immature? | 难道布里奇特说得对 我的确心智不成熟 |
| [07:24] | And all those years | 这么多年来 |
| [07:26] | I was treating her more like a mother than a wife? | 我没把她当老婆看 而是当成了老妈 |
| [07:28] | And how would that make you feel if that were true? | 如果这是真的 你会感觉怎么样 |
| [07:31] | That would make me feel very angry. | 我会感觉非常生气 |
| [07:33] | And repressed anger is sometimes the cause of… | 而抑止怒气有时会导致… |
| [07:36] | Depression. | 抑郁 |
| [07:37] | Ta-da. | 这就对了 |
| [07:40] | Ta-da. | 这就对了 |
| [07:41] | That’s the last thing my dad said before he disappeared. | 我爸消失前说的最后一句话也是这句 |
| [07:47] | Is that it? Am I cured? | 就这样吗 我这就治愈了? |
| [07:49] | Well, “Cured” Is one of those laymen’s terms | 只有门外汉才会说”治愈”这种话 |
| [07:51] | that we psychiatrists try to avoid. | 我们精神医师会避免这么说 |
| [07:55] | It hurts repeat business. | 影响回头生意 |
| [07:57] | Do I need to come back? | 那我还要回来吗 |
| [07:58] | I’m thinking three times a week. | 每周来三次吧 |
| [08:00] | Well, I was going to leave town. | 我还打算搬走呢 |
| [08:02] | Well, then you have a choice to make. | 那你就得做出选择了 |
| [08:03] | You can stay here and make your problems go away, | 你可以留下来 解决你的问题 |
| [08:06] | or you can go away with your problems. | 或者你可以带着你的问题离开 |
| [08:09] | Well, that is going in my book. | 这句话要写进我的书里 |
| [08:13] | Okay, I need to know one more thing. | 好 我还想弄清一件事 |
| [08:16] | When I was having sex with my wife, | 我跟我老婆滚床单的时候 |
| [08:17] | was I really having sex with my mother? | 其实我是在跟我妈滚床单吗 |
| [08:19] | I’m thinking double sessions. | 再加一个会诊时长 |
| [08:21] | Monday, Wednesday, Thursday? | 星期一 三 四 |
| [08:24] | What… You… Um, you don’t work on Fridays? | 你星期五不出诊吗 |
| [08:25] | Not anymore. | 以后不用了 |
| [08:27] | I’ll see you next week. | 下周见 |
| [08:28] | – Thank you, Dr. Freeman. – You’re welcome. | -谢谢你 弗里曼医生 -不客气 |
| [08:31] | Oh, gosh. Okay, that’s fine. | 老天 好吧 没关系 |
| [08:34] | Bye-bye now. | 拜拜 |
| [08:37] | Bye. | 拜 |
| [08:40] | Hmm, maybe I’m not gay. | 说不定我不是同性恋 |
| [08:46] | It turns out all these years, I’ve been trying to duplicate | 原来这么多年来 我一直利用我老婆 |
| [08:48] | the good feelings I have for my mother with my wife. | 获取我对我妈的那种感情 |
| [08:51] | Oh, see, you lose me at good feelings toward my mother. | 那啥 说到对你妈的感情那里我就听不懂了 |
| [08:55] | Uh, I would like a jumbo hot dog, | 我要一个大份的热狗 |
| [08:56] | an extra large nachos and a super slushee. | 超大份的干酪辣玉米 大杯冰沙 |
| [08:59] | Um… you want anything? | 你想吃什么 |
| [09:00] | – No, I’m good. – Oh, come on, you treated me to the movie, | -不用了 -点嘛 你请我看电影 |
| [09:03] | let me treat you to a snack. | 我请你吃小吃 |
| [09:04] | Give my friend a small popcorn. | 给我朋友来份小桶的爆米花 |
| [09:11] | Oh, God! | 我晕 |
| [09:12] | What? | 干嘛 |
| [09:13] | It’s my wife. | 是我老婆 |
| [09:15] | Oh… Wow! | 哦…哇 |
| [09:16] | That is one handsome man she’s with. | 她身边站着个大帅哥呢 |
| [09:22] | You think? | 你觉得他帅? |
| [09:23] | Oh, yeah. He’s gorgeous. | 是啊 帅呆了 |
| [09:27] | He’s better looking than me? | 他比我还帅? |
| [09:28] | Well, it’s apples and oranges. | 你们俩是不同类型 |
| [09:29] | I mean, you’re prettier, but he’s more… | 你比较奶油小生 他比较男人气概 |
| [09:35] | What do I do here? | 那我该咋办 |
| [09:36] | Well, the adult thing | 成年人的做法是 |
| [09:37] | would be to say hello and meet her new fella, | 过去打个招呼 认识她的新情人 |
| [09:39] | but I’m a big believer in | 但我觉得大喊着火了 |
| [09:40] | yelling fire and escaping in the confusion. | 趁乱逃跑的方法更好用 |
| [09:44] | No, no. I’m going to be a grownup. | 不行 我要做个成年人 |
| [09:47] | Bridget! | 布里奇特 |
| [09:47] | Hiya! Over here! | 喂 这里 |
| [09:52] | Oh, Lord. | 老天 |
| [09:53] | The closer he gets, the better he looks. | 他走得越近 我越觉得他帅 |
| [09:56] | Uh, Walden, this is Alex. Alex, Walden. | 沃顿 这是亚历克斯 亚历克斯 这是沃顿 |
| [09:59] | Heard a lot about you. | 久仰您的大名 |
| [10:00] | Yeah? Did you hear about my giant penis? | 是吗 那也久仰过我的大”炮”吧 |
| [10:07] | I smell smoke. Does anybody else smell smoke? | 我好像闻到有烟味 有没有人闻到有烟味 |
| [10:10] | Hey, Alan, Hi. | 艾伦 你好 |
| [10:11] | Hey. | 你好 |
| [10:12] | Alan lives with Walden. | 艾伦跟沃顿住在一起 |
| [10:14] | So, Alex… | 那么 亚历克斯 |
| [10:18] | What do you do? | 你是干啥的 |
| [10:21] | I’m a cosmetic surgeon. | 我是整容医生 |
| [10:23] | Really? Beverly Hills, Botox, boobies? | 是嘛 就像在贝弗利山? 打肉毒杆菌 隆胸? |
| [10:27] | More like Mogadishu, cleft palates and burn victims. | 更多是像在摩加迪沙 治疗兔唇和烧伤病人 |
| [10:31] | He travels around the world helping children in war zones. | 他经常去世界各地 帮助战区的儿童 |
| [10:36] | Oh. | 哦 |
| [10:40] | What are you guys, like, on a date? | 你们俩这是在…约会? |
| [10:41] | Walden, you knew eventually I’d start seeing other people. | 沃顿 你明知道我迟早会跟其他人约会 |
| [10:44] | Nuh-uh. | 我不知道 |
| [10:45] | Whatever. | 随你怎么想 |
| [10:46] | Um, we should go. | 我们走吧 |
| [10:49] | Nice to meet you. | 很高兴认识你 |
| [10:50] | Really? What about this was nice? | 是吗 有啥值得高兴的? |
| [10:56] | You didn’t tell me he turned gay. | 你没告诉我他变同性恋了 |
| [10:59] | He’s gonna split that little guy in half. | 那小子非被他搞得半身不遂不可 |
| [11:05] | What a loser. | 真是个窝囊废 |
| [11:08] | That’ll be $47.28. | 一共是47块2毛8 |
| [11:10] | Oh, oh, damn. | 哦晕 |
| [11:12] | I-I left my wallet in the car. | 我把钱包落在车里了 |
| [11:14] | Uh, do you mind? | 你能先垫着吗 |
| [11:17] | Oh, yeah, sure. | 哦 当然可以 |
| [11:18] | Oh, and throw in some Twizzlers. | 再加点扭扭糖 |
| [11:21] | No, no, the big one. | 不是 要大的 |
| [11:27] | I think you handled that very well, | 我觉得你处理得很好 |
| [11:29] | seeing Bridget with another guy. | 看到布里奇特和其他男人在一起 |
| [11:31] | Another guy? | 其他男人? |
| [11:32] | She’s dating Conan the Humanitarian. | 她简直是在跟人道主义版的野蛮人柯南约会 |
| [11:37] | Yeah, she kinda is. | 这么说倒也是 |
| [11:39] | It’s like evolution, you know? | 就有点像进化论 |
| [11:40] | He is to you as you are to me as I am to a howler monkey. | 吼猴进化成我 我进化成你 你进化成他 |
| [11:45] | That doesn’t make me feel better. | 你这是安慰我的话嘛 |
| [11:46] | How do you think it makes me feel? | 那你应该能想象我的感受 |
| [11:49] | You think she’s sleeping with him? | 你觉得她会和他上床吗 |
| [11:51] | You kidding? | 开什么玩笑 |
| [11:51] | I’m surprised they made it to the movies. | 他们都到看电影的程度了 |
| [11:54] | Oh, God. | 老天 |
| [11:56] | Well, which raises a certain question. | 这倒引出了一个问题 |
| [11:59] | Um, your wife clearly attracts some extraordinary men. | 你老婆显然能吸引一些非常杰出的男士 |
| [12:04] | Of course she does. | 她当然可以 |
| [12:05] | Look at her. | 瞧她那姿色 |
| [12:06] | I have. | 我见识过 |
| [12:10] | Which brings me to the question. | 这让我想到一个问题 |
| [12:12] | Uh, does she have some sort of special powers? | 她是不是有某种特殊的功力 |
| [12:16] | You know, sexually? | 那个 在性方面 |
| [12:18] | What do you mean? | 你什么意思 |
| [12:19] | All right, I’ll just come straight out and say it. | 好 我开门见山地说吧 |
| [12:22] | Does she have a magic vagina? | 她的下面是不是很神奇 |
| [12:25] | Like, can you pull a rabbit out of it? | 能变出个兔子那种? |
| [12:30] | Never mind. | 当我没问 |
| [12:33] | In retrospect, maybe that wasn’t the best movie | 回想起来 你现在这种情况 |
| [12:35] | to see under the circumstances. | 不太适合看这种电影 |
| [12:36] | Are you kidding me? It was perfect. | 开什么玩笑 再适合不过了 |
| [12:38] | Boy meets girl, boy loses girl to a better guy, | 男人邂逅女人 女的抛弃男的 投靠更好的 |
| [12:41] | boy kills himself. | 男的为情自杀 |
| [12:43] | Stil you got to love Sandra Bullock. | 但桑德拉·布洛克的演技还是没的说 |
| [12:46] | – Here, take my keys. – Why? | -我的车钥匙给你 -为啥 |
| [12:47] | ‘Cause I’m going to get dirty, stinking drunk. | 因为哥要醉他个一塌糊涂 |
| [12:50] | Appletini. | 苹果马丁尼 |
| [12:51] | Twice. | 两杯 |
| [12:53] | Two beers. | 两瓶啤酒 |
| [12:57] | Whoa. | 哇 |
| [12:59] | Check it out. | 瞧瞧 |
| [13:01] | What? | 瞧啥 |
| [13:05] | Who’s that remind you of? | 她让你想到谁 |
| [13:08] | Harry Potter? | 哈利·波特 |
| [13:12] | Bridget. | 布里奇特 |
| [13:15] | Maybe a little. So? | 有点吧 那又怎样 |
| [13:16] | So it’s a sign. | 说明这是个征兆啊 |
| [13:17] | Of what? | 什么征兆 |
| [13:18] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
| [13:20] | But I’m going to find out. | 但我要探个明白 |
| [13:21] | Hi, I’m Walden. | 你好 我是沃顿 |
| [13:24] | Danny. | 丹尼 |
| [13:25] | Danny? | 丹尼 |
| [13:27] | Short for Danielle. | 丹尼尔的简称 |
| [13:29] | My father wanted a girl. | 我爸爸想要个女孩儿 |
| [13:31] | It’s nice to meet you, Danny. | 很高兴认识你 丹尼 |
| [13:33] | Let me save you some trouble. | 我还是替你省点时间吧 |
| [13:34] | I’m here with somebody. | 我跟别人一起来的 |
| [13:36] | Oh, yeah, of course. | 哦 这是自然 |
| [13:38] | A beautiful girl like you. | 像你这么漂亮的姑娘 |
| [13:40] | Bathroom’s disgusting. | 这里的厕所恶心死了 |
| [13:42] | I had to do the squat and hover. | 我还得扎马步 |
| [13:46] | At least you’re not peeing in a trough | 至少你不是蹲在水沟上 |
| [13:47] | with looky-loos on either side. | 两边还有人在观望 |
| [13:49] | I’m Alan. | 我是艾伦 |
| [13:51] | Kiki. | 琪琪 |
| [13:52] | Oh, Kiki. | 哦 琪琪 |
| [13:53] | Short for… | 琪琪琪琪 |
| [13:54] | K-Ki-Ki-Ki-Ki. | 的简称 |
| [13:58] | Obviously, I’m gonna have to spell it out for you guys. | 显然 我得给你们挑明了 |
| [14:03] | Oh. Yeah, that certainly clears things up. | 这显然省掉不少麻烦 |
| [14:05] | What, you thought we were hitting on you? | 怎么 你以为我们在挑逗你吗 |
| [14:08] | Maybe I have to spell it out for you. | 也许我也得给你们挑明了 |
| [14:15] | See? | 瞧见没 |
| [14:17] | My apologies. | 我很抱歉 |
| [14:18] | I should’ve known by looking at… him. | 看见他的时候我就该明白了 |
| [14:23] | Uh, what was that about? | 这是什么意思 |
| [14:24] | Just work with me. | 跟我配合下 |
| [14:25] | Still want to buy our drinks? | 还想请咱喝酒吗 |
| [14:27] | Uh, sure. | 当然 |
| [14:28] | Cheers. | 干杯 |
| [14:29] | Cheers. Cheers. | -干杯 -干杯 |
| [14:30] | We’re here, we’re queer, get used to it. | 我们在这儿 我们是同志 慢慢习惯吧[著名同性恋运动口号] |
| [14:38] | Oh, man, check this out. | 瞧瞧这地方 |
| [14:42] | Did you buy it together? | 你们俩一块买的? |
| [14:43] | Oh, I wish. | 我也想呢 |
| [14:44] | Mr. Moneybags bought it. | 钱袋子先生买的 |
| [14:46] | I just make it a home. | 我布置出来的 |
| [14:49] | Come on, Alan, let’s go get our guests a cocktail. | 来啊 艾伦 咱给客人调两杯鸡尾酒 |
| [14:51] | No offense. | 无心冒犯 |
| [14:57] | Oh, cocktail. | 哦 鸡尾巴 |
| [15:01] | All right, what’s the plan? | 好吧 什么计划 |
| [15:03] | We gonna try and get them blind drunk | 把她们俩灌醉了 |
| [15:04] | and then flip them over to our team? | 然后一人一个? |
| [15:06] | What? No. | 什么 不 |
| [15:07] | Don’t worry, I’ll take Danny. | 别担心 我要丹尼好了 |
| [15:08] | You can have the hot one. | 你可以要那个美女 |
| [15:09] | Well, first of all, Danny is the hot one. | 首先 丹尼就是美女 |
| [15:14] | And second of all, I’m not trying to flip anybody. | 第二 我也没想拿下谁 |
| [15:16] | So what was kissing me about? | 那你亲我干嘛 |
| [15:18] | I like her. | 我喜欢她 |
| [15:19] | And I want her to feel comfortable | 我想让她在跟我们在一起时 |
| [15:21] | being around us. | 能觉得自在点 |
| [15:22] | So you used me. | 这么说你利用了我 |
| [15:26] | Oh, come on, Alan. | 拜托 艾伦 |
| [15:27] | She reminds me of Bridget. | 她让我想起布里奇特 |
| [15:28] | Just help me out here. | 你就帮帮我吧 |
| [15:29] | Fine. | 行 |
| [15:31] | Oh, and I’m sorry about kissing you. | 亲你那事我很抱歉 |
| [15:33] | No, it’s all right. | 也没啥 |
| [15:34] | If a man’s gonna kiss me, | 如果非让男人亲我 |
| [15:36] | I prefer he looks like the Son of God. | 我宁可让长得像耶稣的人亲 |
| [15:39] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [15:41] | Now, are we gonna do this? | 一起开始干吧 |
| [15:45] | I can’t quit you. | 不离不弃 |
| [15:52] | So when did you realize you were gay? | 你什么时候意识到自己是同性恋的 |
| [15:54] | Oh, boy, that’s a toughie. | 这话说来话长了 |
| [15:57] | Uh… I guess my first hint | 我猜我第一次意识到 |
| [16:01] | was when I was, like, five or six years old. | 是我五六岁的时候 |
| [16:04] | I used to make my G.I. Joe dolls | 我喜欢让我的玩具兵人 |
| [16:06] | touch each other inappropriately. | 互相亲密接触 |
| [16:09] | I used the horn from my toy unicorn | 我曾经把我的玩具独角兽头上的角拿下来 |
| [16:11] | to make a strap-on for my Barbie. | 当作假阳具装在芭比娃娃身上 |
| [16:15] | Mom was not happy. | 妈妈很不高兴 |
| [16:18] | So when did you come out? | 你什么时候出柜的 |
| [16:20] | It was later. | 很久以后 |
| [16:22] | Uh, I was actually married. | 事实上我结婚了 |
| [16:24] | Ooh, I bet that didn’t end well. | 我敢打赌结局不太妙 |
| [16:26] | No. | 是的 |
| [16:28] | But I still love her. | 可我依然爱她 |
| [16:30] | Even though, you know, I’m playing for Team Penis now. | 虽然 你知道 我现在跟带把的玩 |
| [16:35] | I am. | 没错 |
| [16:38] | So, girlfriend, scale of one to ten, | 女朋友 从1到10打分 |
| [16:42] | exactly how gay are you? | 你有多同性恋? |
| [16:45] | I don’t understand. | 我不明白 |
| [16:47] | Well, you know, one being “Love the one you’re with,” | 1分是”无差别的爱” |
| [16:49] | and ten being “Touch me with that thing and I’ll cut it off.” | 10分是”敢用那玩意儿碰我就给你切了” |
| [16:53] | Oh. | 哦 |
| [16:55] | I still don’t understand. | 我还是不明白 |
| [16:57] | Are you exclusively with girls? | 你是不是只喜欢女的 |
| [16:59] | Oh, no. I like guys, too, sometimes. | 我有时也喜欢男的 |
| [17:02] | Oh. | 哦 |
| [17:03] | What a coincidence. | 多巧啊 |
| [17:04] | I happen to swing both ways as well. | 我也是两性通吃的 |
| [17:06] | Really? | 真的? |
| [17:07] | You don’t look like it. | 你看起来不像啊 |
| [17:12] | So how’d your wife react when you told her you were gay? | 话说当你老婆得知你是同性恋有何反应 |
| [17:14] | She was very understanding. | 她很理解 |
| [17:17] | Very supportive. | 很支持我 |
| [17:18] | That’s nice. | 真不错 |
| [17:20] | Did I tell you we were | 我告诉过你 |
| [17:21] | high school sweethearts? | 我们是高中恋人没? |
| [17:22] | Couple of times. | 好几次了 |
| [17:27] | She was the love of my life. | 她是我此生挚爱啊 |
| [17:28] | What about Alan? | 那艾伦呢 |
| [17:30] | Oh. | 哦 |
| [17:31] | Yeah, you know, I-I… love him. | 对 我爱他 |
| [17:39] | Ah, God, I can’t do this anymore. | 天哪 我演不下去了 |
| [17:41] | I’m on Team Vagina. | 我喜欢没把的 |
| [17:43] | What? | 什么 |
| [17:44] | I miss my wife, and I wanted to hang out with you | 我想我的老婆 我之所以想跟你在一起 |
| [17:47] | because you remind me of her. | 是因为看到你我就想起了她 |
| [17:50] | Really? | 真的? |
| [17:52] | I’m sorry I lied to you. | 我很抱歉骗了你 |
| [17:58] | It’s okay. | 没事 |
| [18:02] | Come here, you poor baby. | 过来 你个可怜的孩子 |
| [18:05] | Don’t even think about it, slick. | 想都不要想 |
| [18:08] | Sorry. I’m sorry. | 我很抱歉 |
| [18:11] | So, if you’re not gay, what’s the deal with Alan? | 如果你不是同性恋 那艾伦是咋回事 |
| [18:16] | I’m not sure. | 我也不知道 |
| [18:17] | He claims to be straight, | 他声称他是直男 |
| [18:19] | but his lips opened a little when I kissed him. | 可当我亲他的时候他嘴唇有点欲拒还迎 |
| [18:24] | Look at me, I’m kissing a girl. | 瞧瞧我 我在亲女人 |
| [18:26] | You’re kissing my girl! | 你是在亲我的女人 |
| [18:28] | Oh! | 哦 |
| [18:29] | Oh, yeah, yuck. | 是啊 恶心 |
| [18:33] | All right, calm down. | 行了 冷静一下 |
| [18:34] | You can tell him he can stop acting gay. | 你告诉他不用演同性恋了 |
| [18:36] | I’m not acting! | 我没演戏 |
| [18:36] | You really hit me hard. | 你真打疼我了 |
| [18:39] | I’m sorry. Let me see. | 我很抱歉 让我瞧瞧 |
| [18:42] | Okay, that was uncalled for. | 这拳打得厉害 |
| [18:43] | How could you?! I’m sorry. | -你怎么能这样 -我很抱歉 |
| [18:44] | Don’t blame her. I mean, it was really… | 别怪她 真的 |
| [18:47] | Come on. | 拜托 |
| [18:49] | Bye, Walden. | 拜 沃顿 |
| [18:51] | Bye, Danny. Bye, Kiki. | 拜 丹尼 拜 琪琪 |
| [18:53] | You have a really lovely home. | 你这家真的很温馨 |
| [18:58] | Are you okay? | 你还好吗 |
| [18:59] | Well, I think she broke my nose, | 我想她打断了我鼻子 |
| [19:02] | but I almost turned a lesbian, so… | 不过我差点就让个女同志变直 所以 |
| [19:06] | I’m gonna count it as a win. | 这次算我赢 |
| [19:09] | Attaboy. | 好样的 |
| [19:20] | This was a nice idea. | 真是个好主意 |
| [19:23] | I’m just trying to cheer you up. | 我就想给你打打气 |
| [19:25] | After all, you did get your ass kicked by a girl. | 毕竟你被一个娘们给狠揍了 |
| [19:29] | Well, jury’s out that it was a “Girl.” | 基本上不能算是个娘们了 |
| [19:32] | Uh, Walden, I-I’ve got a confession to make. | 沃顿 我得向你坦白个事 |
| [19:36] | Listen, I know you didn’t really forget your wallet. | 听着 我知道你不是真的忘带钱包 |
| [19:40] | Oh. | 哦 |
| [19:41] | Okay, then I guess I have two confessions to make. | 那我想我有两件事要向你坦白 |
| [19:45] | Um, the other one is that I-I’ve been a very selfish man. | 另外一件事是我这人很自私 |
| [19:49] | How so? | 怎么说 |
| [19:50] | Well, when you told me you wanted to move to New York, | 当你说你要搬到纽约去时 |
| [19:52] | the only thing I could think about | 我想到的唯一一件事就是 |
| [19:53] | was me losing a great place to live. | 我又要无家可归了 |
| [19:55] | I was totally oblivious to your feelings. | 我完全没有考虑到你的感受 |
| [19:59] | Don’t worry about it. | 别担心了 |
| [19:59] | No, no, no, I need to say this. | 不不 我得说 |
| [20:01] | You know, you’re a great guy and you deserve to be happy. | 你是个好人 你应该得到幸福 |
| [20:04] | And if you have to move, I’d understand. | 如果你非得搬家 我能理解 |
| [20:08] | But, uh, I want you to know | 我想让你知道 |
| [20:11] | I-I’d really, really miss you. | 我会真的很想你 |
| [20:14] | I’d miss you, too. | 我也会想你的 |
| [20:18] | But I’m not going anywhere. | 可我哪儿也不会去的 |
| [20:19] | Oh, you’re not? | 你不搬? |
| [20:21] | Nah, the shrink’s right. | 是啊 心理医生说得对 |
| [20:23] | My problems are gonna follow me wherever I go. | 无论我走到哪儿我的问题都会跟着我 |
| [20:27] | Besides… how could I leave my best friend? | 再说了 我怎么能离开我的好朋友 |
| [20:33] | Aw… | 啊 |
| [20:40] | I’m the luckiest guy in the world. | 我是世界上最幸福的男人 |
| [20:46] | Told you. | 早告诉你了 |