| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | I miss you, too, but what are you doing up? | 我也想你啊 你在做什么 |
| [00:04] | Isn’t it, like, 3:00 in the morning in London? | 早晨三点在伦敦干什么 |
| [00:07] | Yeah, I’ve been having trouble sleeping, too. | 我也有失眠的问题 |
| [00:10] | Alan suggested warm milk and masturbation, | 艾伦推荐热牛奶和打飞机 |
| [00:14] | but that’s his answer for pretty much everything. | 这两样对他而言可以解决大多数问题了 |
| [00:18] | No, don’t worry. | 不用担心我 |
| [00:19] | He’s not gonna live here forever. | 他又不打算在这里住一辈子 |
| [00:21] | More importantly, uh, when are you coming back? | 你什么时候回来啊 |
| [00:25] | Ugh! Really, another week? | 不是吧 还要一个星期 |
| [00:29] | All right, that settles it. | 好吧决定了 |
| [00:30] | I’m gonna heat up some milk. | 我打算热点牛奶 |
| [00:32] | Okay, all right. | 好的 |
| [00:34] | Try to get some sleep. | 你也试着睡一会 |
| [00:37] | I love you. | 我爱你 |
| [00:38] | No, I love you more. | 不 是我更爱你 |
| [00:42] | No, uh-uh, I love you more. | 不不 是我更爱你哦 |
| [00:49] | You got a problem with love? | 你们对爱情有意见吗 |
| [00:51] | Uh-uh. No, no. | 没有 |
| [00:55] | Sorry. | 对不起 |
| [00:56] | Oh, it’s Jake and his friend. | 是杰克和他的朋友 |
| [00:59] | No, he’s not gonna stay here forever, either. | 他也不会在这里住一辈子的 |
| [01:03] | All right, bye-bye. Sweet dreams. | 再见 做个好梦 |
| [01:06] | Sorry, we’ll get out of your way. | 不好意思 我们会回避一下 |
| [01:08] | Nah, that’s okay. | 没什么大不了 |
| [01:10] | What are you guys doing? | 你们小哥俩干什么呢 |
| [01:11] | Well, we were gonna play a video game | 我们想用大屏幕电视玩游戏 |
| [01:13] | on the big screen, but if you’re busy… | 不过你在忙 |
| [01:15] | No, no, come on. | 没关系 |
| [01:16] | Nice. Awesome. | 谢谢太好了 |
| [01:18] | Where’s your dad? | 你爸爸呢 |
| [01:20] | Oh, he’s out with this guy’s mom. | 他和我小兄弟的老妈出去了 |
| [01:21] | Yeah, they’re picking my grandma up | 他们去国际老年人养老院 |
| [01:23] | at the International House of Old People. | 接我祖母去了 |
| [01:27] | I-Hoop. | 国老养 |
| [01:30] | She’s in a rest home? | 你祖母在养老院住吗 |
| [01:31] | I guess they’re resting. | 我猜他们在休息 |
| [01:33] | They don’t move very much. | 那些老人都不怎么动 |
| [01:35] | Oh, except on pudding day. | 除了吃布丁那天 |
| [01:37] | Uh, then you could get trampled. | 否则会被踩死 |
| [01:39] | Wow. Your dad’s meeting his girlfriend’s mother. | 你爹去见女朋友的家长了 |
| [01:43] | That’s a big step. | 看来走到很重要的一步了 |
| [01:44] | What’s bigger than boning each other? | 总比他们滚床单重要些 |
| [01:46] | Shut up! | 闭嘴 |
| [01:47] | Come on. We both know they’re doing it. | 我们都晓得他们在做什么 |
| [01:49] | – We’ve heard them. – Dude! | -我们也没少听到 -哥们 |
| [01:51] | Oh, Alan! Oh, Lyndsey! | 哦 艾伦 哦 林赛 |
| [01:54] | Okay, quit it, or I’m leaving. | 再不打住我就走了 |
| [01:56] | Okay, fine. | 至于么 |
| [01:57] | And I’m taking my game. | 我要带我的游戏走 |
| [01:58] | I apologize. Accepted. | -我道歉 -我接受了 |
| [02:00] | It’s nice you guys have a sense of humor about that stuff. | 我觉得你们对这件事还是很看得开 |
| [02:03] | So many kids of divorce are, like, so angry all the time. | 好多离婚家庭的孩子 都会很愤怒的 |
| [02:06] | Yeah, well, it’s kind of hard to stay angry | 如果他们也和我们一样多抽点大麻 |
| [02:08] | when you smoke as much pot as we do. | 也就气不起来了 |
| [02:10] | Truth. | 真理 |
| [02:12] | When my dad left, I was, like, really angry. | 我爸离开的时候 我心里充满了愤怒 |
| [02:17] | What did you do? | 你做了什么 |
| [02:18] | Just channeled my energy | 就是化愤怒 |
| [02:19] | into learning how to program computers. | 为学习计算机的动力了 |
| [02:21] | Made my first million by the time I was 20. | 在我二十岁的时候赚到了100万 |
| [02:23] | – Oh, that’s our plan, too. – Totally. | -我们也是这么计划的 -绝对的 |
| [02:26] | Really? What language do you guys code in? | 你们学习的什么计算机语言 |
| [02:28] | Java? Perl? C-Plus-Plus? | Java语言 Perl语言还是C++语言 |
| [02:32] | Okay, maybe not a million. | 也许不用赚一百万那么多 |
| [02:44] | You’re in a good mood. | 你心情不错啊 |
| [02:46] | I am. | 的确是的 |
| [02:47] | Looking forward to seeing your mother? | 很想去看你妈妈 |
| [02:49] | Not at all. | 才不是呢 |
| [02:50] | I’m high as a kite. | 我嗑嗨了 |
| [02:53] | If I’m looking forward to anything, | 如果说我在期望什么的话 |
| [02:55] | it’s for that second muscle relaxer to kick in. | 那就是再来一剂肌肉松弛剂 |
| [02:58] | I hear you. Unfortunately, I can’t do that with my mom. | 不幸的是我不能在看我妈的时候抽大麻 |
| [03:01] | I have to stay alert. | 我要随时保持警惕 |
| [03:02] | Dinner with her is like being trapped in a box with a snake. | 和她吃饭就像被关进装了蛇的箱子里 |
| [03:06] | My mom’s more like a hamster. | 我妈更像一个仓鼠 |
| [03:08] | They seem cuddly, but they eat their young. | 看起来很可爱 但是会吃掉自己的孩子 |
| [03:10] | Can’t wait to meet her. | 我真的想看看她 |
| [03:12] | Oh, you’ll love her. | 你会爱上她 |
| [03:13] | Everybody loves her. | 人人都爱她 |
| [03:15] | She’s sweet, shy and charming. | 她对人又甜蜜又迷人 |
| [03:17] | Unless you happened to come out of her uterus, | 但是对自己的孩子例外 |
| [03:20] | then you’re part of a balanced breakfast. | 她把自己的孩子当健康早餐吃掉 |
| [03:22] | That bad, huh? | 真不咋样啊 |
| [03:24] | Yeah, and it’s gotten worse since my dad died. | 我爸死后就更糟糕了 |
| [03:26] | Oh, she must have loved him very much. | 她一定很爱他 |
| [03:28] | Nah, hated his guts. | 她恨我爸恨到骨头里了 |
| [03:30] | She tried to kill him once. | 有一次差点杀了我爸 |
| [03:31] | You’re kidding. | 真的吗 |
| [03:33] | Yeah, they were playing golf. | 他们在玩高尔夫 |
| [03:34] | He gave her a swing tip. | 他告诉她一个挥杆的窍门 |
| [03:35] | She hit him on the head with a pitching wedge. | 她用劈杆直接敲了他的头 |
| [03:37] | A-a pitching wedge? | 劈杆 |
| [03:38] | It was the right club. | 他们在一个不错的俱乐部 |
| [03:40] | They were about 90 yards out. | 离球洞90码左右的地方 |
| [03:43] | Anyway, when he finally died years later, | 总之在他终于死后 |
| [03:45] | she decided he was the love of her life, | 她认识到我爸是她一生最爱 |
| [03:47] | moved into a retirement community, | 然后住进了老年社区 |
| [03:49] | and put a “gone fishing sign” on her hoo-ha. | 然后在她的私处放了一个去钓鱼的标记 |
| [03:51] | Okay, guess I shouldn’t mention golf during dinner. | 吃饭的时候我是不会提起高尔夫的 |
| [03:57] | Or fishing. | 或者钓鱼 |
| [03:59] | Yeah. You might also want to stay away from politics, | 还有你不用提起政治 |
| [04:02] | religion or The Price Is Right. | 宗教以及猜猜多少钱那节目 |
| [04:04] | The Price Is Right? | 猜猜多少钱 |
| [04:05] | She misses Bob Barker. | 她很想念鲍勃巴克 |
| [04:06] | Hates Drew Carey. | 不喜欢德鲁凯利 |
| [04:07] | Oh, really? | 这样啊 |
| [04:08] | I think he’s a wonderful breath of fresh air. | 我还以为德鲁凯利带来一股新的风尚呢 |
| [04:10] | Do not say that. | 别说那个 |
| [04:16] | See, he’s right behind you! | 他就在你后面 |
| [04:17] | Ah! He’s right behind you! | 看见了吗 就在你吼， |
| [04:19] | Move! Move! Duck! | 躲开 躲开 |
| [04:20] | Ah, ah, don’t worry, Junior. I got this! | 别担心小屁孩 我搞的定 |
| [04:23] | Aah, crap. | 该死的 |
| [04:25] | Watch and learn. | 学着点儿 |
| [04:27] | Man, I used to be a lot better at this. | 我过去可是很厉害的 |
| [04:30] | I guess I’m just out of practice. | 只是很久没复习的原因 |
| [04:32] | That’s ’cause you got a girlfriend now. | 是因为你有女朋友了 |
| [04:34] | Yeah. Your thumbs have gotten weak. | 你的拇指已经退化了 |
| [04:37] | That’s why I choose to be a bachelor. | 所以我才宁愿单身 |
| [04:39] | Yeah, that’s why. | 好吧这就是你单身的原因 |
| [04:43] | So, what’s the deal with you and Zoey? | 你和佐伊是什么关系 |
| [04:45] | Are you gonna marry her? | 你要娶她吗 |
| [04:46] | I don’t know. I mean, I love her and all, | 我也不知道 我爱她的一切 |
| [04:49] | but I just got out of a marriage. | 但是我刚走出一段婚姻 |
| [04:51] | Do I really want to be back in one? | 这围城我到底是再进去呢还是不进呢 |
| [04:53] | Hell, yeah. She’s hot. | 必须进啊 她身材那么辣 |
| [04:54] | It’s not about how hot she is. | 这和她身材有多辣没关系 |
| [04:56] | Oh, thank you, Jake. | 感谢理解 杰克 |
| [04:58] | It’s about whether she stays hot. | 这和她身体能否保持这种辣度有关系 |
| [05:04] | I mean, plus, there’s some serious stuff to consider. | 再说 我还要考虑其他一些重要的因素 |
| [05:07] | She has a daughter, so I’d be a stepdad. | 她有个女儿 以后我就是个继父了 |
| [05:10] | My stepdad’s a pretty cool guy. | 当继父也可以很酷的 |
| [05:12] | I mean, he’s always slipping me money. | 我的继父就经常塞钱给我花 |
| [05:14] | I think he feels bad about replacing my dad. | 可能取代了我亲爹他心存愧疚吧 |
| [05:16] | Or about banging your mom. | 或者是因为他上了你亲妈 |
| [05:19] | Shut up! | 闭嘴 |
| [05:20] | Mm, doesn’t feel so good, does it? | 这感觉不好受 对吧 |
| [05:23] | That’s what your mom said. | 你亲妈就这么跟你说的吧 |
| [05:27] | All right, can we please talk about something other than sex? | 打住 咱能别总揪着性这个话题不放吗 |
| [05:30] | – Yes. – Okay. | -行 -好的 |
| [05:32] | But for the record, I’m not a virgin. | 不过事先申明 我不是处了 |
| [05:34] | Good to know. | 很高兴知道 |
| [05:36] | Neither am I. | 我也不是处了 |
| [05:39] | At least I think I’m not. | 至少我是这么认为的 |
| [05:41] | It was dark. | 暗得伸手不见五指 |
| [05:43] | Could have been just leg. | 可能只是腿吧 |
| [05:47] | But that still counts. | 不过这处应该算是破了 |
| [05:48] | No, it doesn’t. | 当然不算 |
| [05:50] | Right? | 你说呢 |
| [05:51] | Listen, if he thinks he got laid, | 要是他都觉得自己干了一炮 |
| [05:52] | what difference does it make? | 那我们跟这儿闹什么闹 |
| [05:53] | Thank you. | 谢谢支持 |
| [05:58] | Mom, this is Alan. | 妈 这是艾伦 |
| [05:59] | Alan, this is my mom Jean. | 艾伦 这是我妈 珍 |
| [06:01] | Hi. Nice to meet you. | 嗨 幸会 |
| [06:02] | How are you? | 你怎么样 |
| [06:03] | Uh, good, good. | 好得很 好得很 |
| [06:04] | Although I-I got to admit, I’m-I’m a little nervous. | 不过我得承认 我有点小紧张 |
| [06:07] | You know, I hope Mom likes me, you know? | 丑女婿见岳母 是吧 |
| [06:09] | Relax, Alan. | 放轻松 艾伦 |
| [06:10] | When it comes to men, | 只要是和男人有关的事 |
| [06:11] | Lyndsey has never set the bar very high. | 林赛是从来都不挑肥拣瘦的 |
| [06:14] | What’s that supposed to mean? | 你说这话是什么意思 |
| [06:16] | I’m just saying that you’ve always gone | 我就是想说 你从来是 |
| [06:18] | for quantity over quality. | 重量不重质的 |
| [06:20] | It’s a choice. I’m not judging. | 萝卜青菜 各有所爱 |
| [06:23] | Come on, muscle relaxers. | 赶紧的 肌肉松弛剂 |
| [06:26] | So, Alan, do you have children? | 艾伦 你有孩子吗 |
| [06:29] | Uh, I do. I have a son. Mm. | 恩我有 我有个儿子 |
| [06:31] | That’s good, | 那敢情好 |
| [06:32] | ’cause even if Lyndsey could bear another child, | 就算林赛能和这拖油瓶和睦相处 |
| [06:35] | I’m not sure that would be the smartest move. | 我也不觉得这是一个明智之举 |
| [06:38] | Mom! | 妈 |
| [06:40] | Tell the truth. | 那你实话告诉我 |
| [06:42] | Do you want another one like Eldridge? | 艾尔德里奇这样的娃再来一个你要吗 |
| [06:43] | Let’s just change the subject. | 我们还是换一个话题吧 |
| [06:46] | Does anybody want another Eldridge? | 艾尔德里奇这样的娃有人会要吗 |
| [06:50] | How are things at Sunset Village? | 日落村那怎么样了 |
| [06:53] | Same old, same old. | 老样子 老住户 |
| [06:55] | Well, actually, some of the same old died, | 其实有些老住户安息了 |
| [06:57] | so we got some new old. | 然后又来了些新住户 |
| [06:59] | Oh, th’s awful. | 哦 那太糟糕了 |
| [07:01] | Not really. | 也不尽然 |
| [07:02] | If you get to their condo before the relatives, | 如果你比他们的亲戚先到那空公寓 |
| [07:05] | you can score some great stuff. | 你总能淘到一些好东西 |
| [07:07] | Oh, Mom, you’re not saying… | 妈 你不是吧… |
| [07:09] | How do you think I got this lovely sweater? | 要不然我这件漂亮的毛衣从哪来的 |
| [07:11] | It certainly wasn’t a Mother’s Day gift. | 母亲节可没见谁送我这个啊 |
| [07:16] | if it comes up, I’m a 40 regular. | 如果有的话 我平常穿40码中号的 |
| [07:23] | So, Mom, do you want to do anything special this weekend? | 妈 这周末有什么特别想干的吗 |
| [07:27] | I’ll be happy doing whatever you want. | 随便干什么我都乐意啊 |
| [07:29] | Oh, well, I-I thought maybe tomorrow we could have lunch | 那好 明天我们或许可以去 |
| [07:32] | at the Santa Monica Pier, then go for a walk on the beach. | 圣莫尼卡码头吃顿饭 然后沙滩上走走 |
| [07:35] | Oh, okay. | 哦 那好吧 |
| [07:38] | We don’t have to. | 我们也不是非要去啦 |
| [07:40] | No, that’s fine. | 不 没事 |
| [07:42] | I’m not afraid of homeless people. | 那些流浪汉是吓不倒我的 |
| [07:46] | You know, your daughter’s a good lady. | 令千金是个好女人啊 |
| [07:48] | You did a great job with her, Jean. | 都是你抚养教育得好 珍 |
| [07:51] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [07:52] | But it was touch and go for a while. | 有段时间咱母女关系还是挺紧张的 |
| [07:56] | She told you about her show business career, right? | 她跟你说她的娱乐圈生涯了吧 |
| [07:58] | Seriously, Mom? Really? | 我去 妈 当真要提 |
| [08:00] | What? It was a very nice movie– | 怎么了 那是一部不错的影片啊 |
| [08:03] | if you like pornography. | 如果你喜欢看黄片的话 |
| [08:05] | Okay, I-I saw it, and-and it wasn’t pornography. | 我看过了 也算不上什么黄片啦 |
| [08:09] | Well, it wasn’t Mary Poppins. | 那也不能当《欢乐满人间》来看啊 |
| [08:15] | So, | 那么 |
| [08:17] | you guys graduate this year, right? | 你俩今年就要毕业了 是吧 |
| [08:19] | I do. | 我要毕业了 |
| [08:20] | I do, too. | 我也要毕业了 |
| [08:21] | Well, that’s what you said last year. | 你去年就这么说过 |
| [08:23] | Yeah, but now, they’re one more year sicker of me. | 是啊 不过今年老师们更盼望我早点毕业了 |
| [08:27] | So what are you gonna do now? | 那你们未来有什么打算 |
| [08:30] | Well, we were hoping we could work for you. | 我们想替你干活 |
| [08:36] | Doing what? | 干什么活 |
| [08:38] | We’d be, like, consultants. | 我们会像个 顾问 |
| [08:41] | And what would you be consulting about? | 那你们具体提供什么咨询服务 |
| [08:45] | Well, that would be our first consultation. | 这会是我们的第一个议题 |
| [08:51] | How about this? | 不如这样 |
| [08:52] | We could tell you what kids these days are into | 我们可以告诉你如今的娃都疯什么 |
| [08:54] | and then develop killer apps to target that geographic. | 你来开发针对这”地理区域”的牛叉应用 |
| [08:58] | Demographic. | 年龄区域[音同Democratic民主党] |
| [09:00] | No, Republican kids, too. | 不 共和党的孩子也要照顾到 |
| [09:07] | All right, Consultants, | 那好 顾问们 |
| [09:09] | tell me some of your app ideas. | 多说点关于这种应用的想法 |
| [09:12] | Okay, well, you know, uh, | 行 那什么 呃 |
| [09:14] | when you take a picture of your junk and send it to a girl? | 当你想给你那话儿拍张照传给个妞时 |
| [09:19] | Um… no. | 这种想法我倒是没有过 |
| [09:23] | But I understand the concept. | 不过这神韵我是领会了 |
| [09:24] | Okay, okay, well, this app makes your junk look bigger. | 很好 这应用能让家伙事儿显得更雄伟 |
| [09:28] | And you can customize it. | 你还可以专属订制哦亲 |
| [09:33] | You can customize your junk? | 你还能订制你的那话儿? |
| [09:34] | Yeah, you know, like silly hats, | 对啊 比如戴个傻兮兮的帽子啦 |
| [09:37] | glasses, little messages. | 戴副眼镜啦 添加文字啦 |
| [09:39] | “Wish you were here.” | “希望你能在这里” |
| [09:42] | Get it? Get it? | 懂了没 懂了没 |
| [09:45] | Yeah, I get it. | 好 我懂了 |
| [09:46] | So, it’s like Photoshop, but for your junk. | 就像图片作坊 不过是为了小弟特制的 |
| [09:49] | We call it Junkshop. | 我们管它叫”大屌作坊” |
| [09:54] | It’s a good name. | 是个好名字 |
| [09:55] | What do you do if you already got big junk? | 那如果你那话儿已经够大了怎么办 |
| [09:58] | Oh, way ahead of you. Tell him about Boobshop. | 早想到了 跟他说说咱的”美乳作坊” |
| [10:00] | All right, you know how girls always complain | 你知道那些妞常常抱怨自己 |
| [10:03] | about one boob being bigger than the other? | 一边咪咪大一边咪咪小 |
| [10:10] | Oh, thank God, she’s asleep. | 谢天谢地 她总算睡着了 |
| [10:13] | I don’t think I can last four days. | 我觉得我忍不了四天这么久 |
| [10:15] | Every word out of her mouth pushes my buttons. | 她一张口我火就往上窜啊 |
| [10:17] | Yeah, I saw. She’s like a ninja mom. | 是啊 她就像个忍者老妈 |
| [10:19] | She sneaks in, destroys your will to live, | 她悄悄潜入 摧毁你的生存意志 |
| [10:21] | and then, disappears without a trace. | 然后消失无影踪 |
| [10:22] | So I’m not crazy? | 所以我没发疯 |
| [10:24] | Oh, no, not at all. Oh. | 当然没 |
| [10:25] | In fact, it kind of makes me grateful for my mom. | 事实上 这让我对我妈心存感激之情 |
| [10:27] | What do you mean? | 什么意思 |
| [10:28] | Well, there’s no sneaking | 她不跟我玩潜入 |
| [10:29] | and stabbing in the back. | 或者背后捅刀 |
| [10:30] | She just walks right up to you, | 她直接走到你跟前 |
| [10:31] | and hits you in the face with a lead pipe. | 用铁管直接打你脑袋 |
| [10:34] | I wonder what would happen | 很难想象她们俩 |
| [10:35] | if we put them in the same room together. | 要是凑一块儿会怎样 |
| [10:38] | Uh. Momageddon. | 嗯 老妈末日 |
| [10:40] | Although… it wouldn’t be the worst idea in the world. | 不过…这主意也许不算糟 |
| [10:44] | What?! | 什么 |
| [10:45] | Well, think about it. | 你想想呢 |
| [10:46] | They’re around the same age, they’re single, | 她们差不多一个年纪 她们都是单身 |
| [10:48] | they’re both deeply disappointed in their children | 她们都对自己的孩子非常失望 |
| [10:51] | and their children’s children. | 还有孙辈 |
| [10:53] | They might hit it off. | 说不定会合得来 |
| [10:55] | And if they did, it might give us a break. | 要是真合得来 说不定能让我们喘口气 |
| [10:58] | You know what? Tell you what– | 你猜咋的 跟你说 |
| [10:59] | I will call my mom and try to set up a dinner. | 我要给我妈打电话约她吃晚饭 |
| [11:02] | Oh, Alan, | 哦 艾伦 |
| [11:03] | -that would be wonderful. -Mm. | -那就太好了 -唔 |
| [11:05] | I owe you one. | 我欠你个人情 |
| [11:06] | You still owe me one from my birthday. | 我生日那次还欠我呢 |
| [11:09] | Well… | 嗯 |
| [11:11] | if she wasn’t here, I’d be steering this car | 要是她不在 我就要用我的后脑勺 |
| [11:13] | with the back of my head right now. | 来驾驶方向盘了 |
| [11:19] | Looks like she’s sleeping pretty good. | 她看上去睡得挺沉啊 |
| [11:23] | Oh, what the hell? Scoot your seat back. | 管他呢 把你座椅往后调 |
| [11:26] | Yay! | 耶 |
| [11:38] | Hey, what you doing? | 嘿 你在干嘛 |
| [11:39] | Absolutely nothing. | 啥都不干 |
| [11:41] | I’m bored out of my mind. | 我都快闲死了 |
| [11:42] | Oh, well, Lyndsey and I are having dinner with our moms. | 我和林赛要和我们的妈妈一起共进晚餐 |
| [11:44] | You’re welcome to join us. | 有兴趣吗 |
| [11:45] | A two-mom dinner? | 两妈晚餐 |
| [11:47] | You can say no. | 你可以拒绝 |
| [11:48] | No. God, no. | 不了 绝对的不要 |
| [11:50] | I get you. | 明白你 |
| [11:51] | I don’t want to go, either. | 我也不想去 |
| [11:52] | Why are you doing it? | 那你何必呢 |
| [11:55] | Are you thinking about getting married? | 你是要准备结婚吗 |
| [11:56] | Um, to answer your questions in reverse order: | 按倒序回答你的问题 |
| [11:59] | not at the moment and oral sex. | 这会儿不想 口交 |
| [12:01] | Night. | 晚安 |
| [12:05] | Oral sex. | 口交 |
| [12:08] | Time to warm up the old milk. | 得热下牛奶了 |
| [12:11] | Oh, great, Amy. | 哦 太好了 艾米 |
| [12:13] | We’ll be there. | 我们马上到 |
| [12:14] | What’s going on? | 怎么了 |
| [12:15] | Just got invited | 有人邀请我们 |
| [12:16] | to a slammin’ party in the Valley. | 去参加郊区的一个派对 |
| [12:18] | Cool. | 不错啊 |
| [12:19] | Can we borrow your car? | 能借下你的车 |
| [12:24] | Uh, all right, let me think. | 让我想想 |
| [12:26] | Two potheads want to borrow my $100,000 car | 两个瘾君子想借我价值10万美元的豪车 |
| [12:30] | to go to a slammin’ party in the Valley. | 参加郊区的派对 |
| [12:34] | Sounds like a no. | 听起来是拒绝 |
| [12:35] | Wait, wait, wait. | 慢着慢着 |
| [12:36] | Let’s hear him out. | 听他讲 |
| [12:38] | It’s a no! | 绝对的不 |
| [12:41] | I’ll give you guys a ride. | 给你们当司机吧 |
| [12:43] | – Oh, sweet. – Thanks. | -太好了 -谢谢 |
| [12:45] | What you got going on with the water? | 你们在放水干嘛 |
| [12:46] | Oh, we had another idea for an app. | 我们又有个开发应用的主意 |
| [12:49] | Let me guess– Sinkshop. | 我猜猜 水槽店 |
| [12:51] | Oh, no, no. | 不不 |
| [12:52] | Okay, imagine the app is on my phone. | 想象下你手机上有那个应用 |
| [12:55] | – All right. – Go ahead. | -行啊 -来 |
| [12:57] | Now, all I do | 现在只要我 |
| [12:59] | is press this button, and our app will tell you | 按下按钮 我们的应用就能告诉你 |
| [13:02] | exactly how long you can hold your breath underwater. | 你能在水里憋多久 |
| [13:10] | That’s clever. | 真聪明 |
| [13:12] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [13:13] | How is it different than the stopwatch | 这跟你手机上早就有的码表功能 |
| [13:15] | that’s already on your phone? | 到底有啥区别 |
| [13:16] | The what? | 什么功能 |
| [13:17] | See this little clock? | 看见这个小钟么 |
| [13:21] | Oh. | 哦 |
| [13:23] | Damn. | 该死 |
| [13:25] | How long? | 多久 |
| [13:31] | So this is nice, huh? | 不错吧 |
| [13:33] | Lovely. | 很好 |
| [13:34] | I can’t remember how long it’s been | 我都不记得上次 |
| [13:35] | since the last time you called me to have dinner. | 你约我吃晚饭都是什么时候的事了 |
| [13:37] | Oh, come on. It hasn’t been that long. | 拜托 哪有那么久 |
| [13:39] | Oh, please. Jake was still cute. | 拉倒吧 那时候杰克还很可爱呢 |
| [13:42] | Guess it has been awhile. | 看来是有一阵子了 |
| [13:44] | So what’s up with this dinner? | 那这顿饭是咋回事 |
| [13:46] | Why are you finally allowing me to meet your girlfriend? | 你为什么突然允许我会会你的女朋友了呢 |
| [13:48] | First of all, I wasn’t disallowing you | 首先 我从没不允许 |
| [13:49] | from meeting her; I was just, uh… | 你见她 我只是 |
| [13:51] | avoiding it as long as possible. | 尽可能的避免 |
| [13:55] | Uh, but things are more serious between us now, | 不过现在我们俩比较认真起来了 |
| [13:57] | and I thought it might be nice | 我觉得你们俩见一下 |
| [13:58] | for you two to get to know each other. | 会比较好 |
| [14:00] | – All right. – And her mother might come along. | -好吧 -还有她妈妈也会来 |
| [14:03] | Her mother? | 她妈? |
| [14:04] | Yeah, she’s, uh, in town visiting. | 她来城里玩几天 |
| [14:05] | I thought you two might hit it off. | 我觉得你们俩也许合得来 |
| [14:07] | Alan, you know I don’t like old people. | 艾伦 你知道我不喜欢老人家 |
| [14:13] | I do know, but you’ll like her. | 我知道 不过你会喜欢她的 |
| [14:15] | She’s young at heart, like you. | 她有着一颗年轻的心 就跟你一样 |
| [14:16] | I’m young everywhere– all the parts. | 我浑身上下哪儿都很年轻 |
| [14:19] | Sure. | 当然 |
| [14:20] | What I haven’t replaced, | 只要我还没换过的 |
| [14:21] | I’ve had tightened, bleached or trimmed. | 我都拉紧 漂白 修整过 |
| [14:24] | Got it. | 明白 |
| [14:26] | So where’s the old biddy live? | 这老人家住哪儿 |
| [14:28] | Palmdale. | 棕榈谷 |
| [14:29] | Palmdale, ech. | 棕榈谷 厄 |
| [14:32] | Is she married? | 她结婚了吗 |
| [14:34] | Uh, widow. | 丧偶 |
| [14:35] | How’d her husband die? | 她老公怎么死的 |
| [14:36] | Heart attack. | 心脏病 |
| [14:37] | Boring. | 无聊 |
| [14:39] | She did actually try to kill him once. | 她也曾想亲手杀掉的来着 |
| [14:42] | Oh. | 哦 |
| [14:43] | Well, at least we have something in common. | 嗯 至少我们有点共同语言了 |
| [14:48] | Sure you gave me the right address? | 你给的地址对吗 |
| [14:50] | Yeah. | 对啊 |
| [14:52] | 1478 Amy Lane. | 艾米道1478号 |
| [14:55] | Wait a sec. | 慢着 |
| [14:57] | Isn’t Amy Lane the name of the chick having the party? | 艾米·道不就是举办派对那妞的名字吗 |
| [15:03] | It may not be Amy Lane. | 那可能不是艾米·道吧 |
| [15:08] | But we’re on Amy Lane. | 但我们就在艾米道上 |
| [15:12] | An amazing coincidence, huh? | 真是个奇妙的巧合呀 对不 |
| [15:17] | Is there somebody you guys can call? | 你们可以打电话问人吗 |
| [15:18] | I mean, I can call Amy Lane. | 我可以打给艾米·道 |
| [15:20] | If that is, in fact, her real name. | 如果那是她的真名的话 |
| [15:29] | Evelyn, Alan tells me you do a lot of traveling. | 艾芙琳 艾伦告诉我你经常四处旅行 |
| [15:31] | Yes. I love it. | 没错 我喜欢旅行 |
| [15:33] | The classical architecture, the exotic cuisine, | 让我尽情享受古典建筑 异国佳肴 |
| [15:36] | the uncircumcised men. | 以及没有接受过割礼的男子 |
| [15:40] | Although one could make a case | 尽管最后这点也可以 |
| [15:41] | that falls under “exotic cuisine.” | 被归类到”异国佳肴” |
| [15:45] | Just like you and Alan in the car. | 就好比你和艾伦在车里干的 |
| [15:53] | Do you guys travel much? | 你们经常旅行吗 |
| [15:54] | Not anymore. | 现在不去了 |
| [15:56] | But when my husband was alive, we went everywhere. | 我丈夫在世的时候 我们无处不去 |
| [15:59] | Six Flags, Epcot, Dollywood. | 六旗游乐园 迪斯尼未来世界 多莉主题公园 |
| [16:02] | Charming. | 真了不起 |
| [16:04] | Real globe-trotter. | “名副其实”的环球玩家 |
| [16:06] | Speaking of which, I once slept with Meadowlark Lemon. | 说到这 我还睡过梅多拉克·莱蒙呢 |
| [16:10] | Let me tell you, | 我跟你说哦 |
| [16:12] | basketballs weren’t the only thing he could spin. | 他会转的”球”不只是篮球哦 |
| [16:18] | I’m so sorry. | 我对不起你 |
| [16:21] | I hope this is it. | 希望是这里 |
| [16:22] | They have a balloon on the mailbox that says party. | 在邮箱上挂气球就代表这有派对 |
| [16:29] | Yeah? | 有事吗 |
| [16:32] | Uh, is this where the party is? | 请问您这里是开派对吗 |
| [16:34] | Oh, you saw the balloon, huh? | 你们看见气球了 对吧 |
| [16:38] | Come on in. | 快进来 |
| [16:39] | – Okay. – Oh, hang on. | -好的 -等下 |
| [16:40] | Hang on. Excuse us. | 等下 容我们单独说句话 |
| [16:42] | Don’t you pay attention in health class? | 你上健康教育课的时候没认真听吗 |
| [16:45] | What are you talking about? | 你想说什么啊 |
| [16:46] | Stranger danger. | 生人勿近 |
| [16:50] | No, he seems okay. | 不 他看起来还行呀 |
| [16:52] | You guys like to wrestle? | 你们俩喜欢玩摔角吗 |
| [16:55] | – Let’s book it, dude.- Yeah. | -还是听课本的话吧 伙计 -好 |
| [16:57] | – Walden! – Don’t go! | -对 沃顿 -别走 |
| [17:01] | Always a bridesmaid. | 我永远不被大家接受 |
| [17:12] | Really, Alan? | 真好意思呀 艾伦 |
| [17:16] | Why don’t I get this? | 这顿还是我来请吧 |
| [17:19] | Well, you got to admit my plan worked. | 不得不说我的计划成功了 |
| [17:21] | They hit it off and left us pretty much unscathed. | 她俩十分投缘 对咱俩也没啥坏处 |
| [17:23] | Plus, thanks to your mom, | 再说了 多亏了你妈 |
| [17:25] | my mom can now go back to her retirement community | 我妈可以回退休安养院 |
| [17:27] | and show all her girlfriends what happens when you Google “Santorum.” | 跟她所有老太太展示 搜索”肛液”时会出现什么画面 |
| [17:27] | Santorum指肛交过后肛门里会流出的润滑剂和粪便的混合液体 状如浓稠的咖啡 | |
| [17:33] | Lyndsey, will you take me to get a tramp stamp? | 琳赛 你能带我去弄个”婊子印章”吗 |
| [17:36] | What? | 什么 |
| [17:38] | It’s a cute little tattoo right here. | 是在腰下方挨着屁股的纹身 |
| [17:40] | Evelyn has one. | 艾芙琳就有一个 |
| [17:41] | You do? | 真的吗 |
| [17:42] | I got it in Singapore. | 我在新加坡时纹的 |
| [17:44] | The Chinese characters for: “Thank you. Come again.” | 中文字的意思是”谢谢 欢迎再次光临” |
| [17:49] | All right, well, we’re done here. | 好吧 晚餐吃完了 |
| [17:51] | Why don’t we head home? | 也该回家了吧 |
| [17:52] | I don’t want to go home. | 我还不想回家 |
| [17:53] | Evelyn says there’s a place right down the street | 艾芙琳说街尾有一家店 |
| [17:56] | where they have music and dancing. | 既可以享受音乐还能跳舞 |
| [17:58] | Oh, I don’t think so. It’s getting kind of late. | 算了吧 现在有点晚了 |
| [18:00] | Yeah, we both have to work in the morning. | 对啊 我们俩明天一早还要上班呢 |
| [18:01] | I don’t. | 我不用呀 |
| [18:03] | Neither do I. | 我也不用 |
| [18:04] | Why don’t you two fuddy-duddies run along | 你俩老古董何不先回家 |
| [18:06] | and let Jean and I have some fun? | 让我和简好好玩玩 |
| [18:08] | How will you get home? | 那你们俩怎么回家呀 |
| [18:09] | Alan, I made it from Brunei to Morocco with nothing | 艾伦 我就背着一袋衣服和一管润滑剂 |
| [18:12] | but the clothes on my back and a tube of lubricant. | 身无分文地从文莱去到摩洛哥 |
| [18:15] | I think I can get us from Tarzana to Sherman Oaks. | 我也有办法让我们从这里回家 |
| [18:18] | Isn’t she a hoot? | 她是不是很妙呀 |
| [18:22] | All right, if you’re sure. | 好吧 如果你确定的话 |
| [18:23] | Let’s go. | 走吧 |
| [18:26] | You think we’ll find some cute fellas to dance with? | 你觉得我们可以找俩老帅哥共舞吗 |
| [18:29] | Oh, Jean, Jean, Jean. | 简呀 简呀 单纯的小简呀 |
| [18:31] | We’re not going to dance. | 我们才不是去跳舞呢 |
| [18:38] | Should have written the address down, dude. | 伙计 你应该把地址写下来 |
| [18:40] | I did write it down. | 我是有写下来啊 |
| [18:41] | She must have told it to me wrong. | 她肯定把地址说错了 |
| [18:42] | Or maybe you heard it wrong. | 或者你听错了 |
| [18:44] | If only there was an app that could capture the spoken word. | 如果有能记录人说的话的应用程序就好了 |
| [18:49] | If only there was an app that could capture the spoken word. | 如果有能记录人说的话的应用程序就好了 |
| [18:55] | Don’t mock us, man. | 别嘲笑我们了 伙计 |
| [18:57] | Don’t mock us, man. | 别嘲笑我们了 伙计 |
| [19:03] | Hi, Jake. | 你好 杰克 |
| [19:04] | Hi, Eldridge. | 你好 艾尔德里奇 |
| [19:08] | I bet they were at the party. | 我猜她们肯定去那个派对了 |
| [19:10] | Yeah, maybe they can tell us where it is. | 对 或许她们可以告诉我地点 |
| [19:13] | Oh, good thinking. | 好主意 |
| [19:13] | I’ll text ’em. | 我发短信问她们 |
| [19:17] | Wait, I don’t have their numbers. | 完了 我没她们电话 |
| [19:19] | Man, we’re never going to find this party. | 天啊 我们永远也找不到那个派对了 |
| [19:25] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [19:28] | Let me ask you a question. | 我问你们个问题 |
| [19:30] | If you had made it to the party, what would you have done there? | 如果你们去了派对 你们会在那干嘛 |
| [19:33] | Try to hook up with some chicks. | 努力把妹呀 |
| [19:45] | Why don’t you hook up with them? | 为什么你们不直接去把她们呢 |
| [19:49] | Right there– that’s why you’re rich. | 就是 怪不得你那么有钱 |
| [19:54] | Would you mind very much if we, you know, blew you off? | 你不介意我们扔你一个人在这儿吧 |
| [19:57] | I would worry about you if you didn’t. | 如果你们不这么做 我才介意呢 |
| [19:59] | – Bye. – Later. | -走啦 -晚点见 |
| [20:02] | Hello, ladies. | 女士们 |
| [20:04] | Mind if we hook up with you? | 介意我们把你们呢 |
| [20:12] | – Morning. – Morning. | -早安 -早安 |
| [20:13] | You and Evelyn have a good time last night? | 你和艾芙琳昨晚玩得开心吗 |
| [20:15] | Fantastic. | 棒极了 |
| [20:17] | I adore your mother. | 我爱死你母亲了 |
| [20:18] | That’s only because you just met her. | 那是因为你还不够了解她 |
| [20:21] | I don’t know, I think I got to know her pretty well. | 不好说 我觉得我对她了解得很”深入” |
| [20:24] | Good morning, darling. | 早安 亲爱的 |
| [20:28] | Hi, Peaches. | 早安 小蜜桃 |
| [20:36] | Once again, I’m so, so sorry. | 我只能说 我非常 非常对不起你 |