| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:04] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [00:06] | – Wow. She’s cute. – She sure is. | -她挺可爱啊 -的确 |
| [00:09] | She sucks in bed. | 她床技很差[床上口交] |
| [00:11] | And not in a good way. | 我是指技术很差 |
| [00:14] | Her, too? | 她也是拉拉吗 |
| [00:15] | I-I didn’t even know she was gay. | 我都不知道她是个拉拉 |
| [00:16] | Neither did she, till last Thursday. | 她也是到了上周四才知道的 |
| [00:19] | You’re like some kind of lesbian zombie | 你就像是拉拉僵尸似的 |
| [00:22] | infecting all the women of Malibu. | 感染所有马里布女人 |
| [00:25] | I like that. | 我喜欢 |
| [00:26] | Must have vagina. | 一定要洞洞 |
| [00:29] | Must have vagina. | 一定要洞洞 |
| [00:32] | Sounds like some kind of weird help wanted ad | 听起来像是艾伦会去贴的某种奇怪 |
| [00:34] | Alan would place. | 征求帮助的帖子 |
| [00:38] | So when did you realize that you were gay? | 你是什么时候发现自己是拉拉的 |
| [00:40] | What’s that I hear? | 我刚听到了啥 |
| [00:41] | Is that your own closet door finally swinging open? | 是你的某人出柜的柜门打开了吗 |
| [00:44] | Trust me, if I was gay | 相信我 如果我是基 |
| [00:46] | you’d be the first one to know. | 你一定会第一个”知道” |
| [00:49] | You know, I think I was in high school | 我发现的时候 |
| [00:51] | when I figured it out. | 好像是高中吧 |
| [00:52] | A bunch of my friends were having a sleepover | 我跟一群朋友一起去朋友家过夜 |
| [00:54] | and we started talking about | 然后大家开始聊 |
| [00:56] | what it would be like to kiss a boy | 跟男人接吻是什么感觉 |
| [00:57] | and who was the best kisser. | 谁的吻技最好 |
| [00:58] | So me and my friend Kimberly, | 所以我跟我朋友金伯莉 |
| [01:00] | who was a cheerleader, | 她还是拉拉队员哦 |
| [01:01] | decided to settle it by making out. | 决定接吻分高下 |
| [01:04] | A-a cheerleader? | 拉拉队员吗 |
| [01:05] | Let the woman talk. | 女人说话别插嘴 |
| [01:07] | Kimberly was so hot. | 金伯莉长得超性感 |
| [01:09] | I still remember how soft her lips felt | 我还记得她的香唇有多柔软 |
| [01:12] | as she slipped her hand under my shirt | 她当时一边把手伸进我的衣服 |
| [01:15] | and kissed her way down my body. | 一边慢慢吻下我的身躯 |
| [01:20] | Must’ve been a strange and confusing time for you. | 当时你一定感觉很奇怪又迷茫 |
| [01:25] | Please continue. | 请继续说 |
| [01:27] | She closed her eyes. | 她闭上了双眼 |
| [01:30] | She parted her lips. | 双唇微开 |
| [01:31] | She arched her back | 弓起了背部 |
| [01:34] | and I whispered in her ear, | 我轻声在她耳畔道 |
| [01:38] | “Oh, my God, | “我的老天爷啊 |
| [01:40] | Kimberly, | 金伯莉 |
| [01:42] | I can’t believe | 我真不敢相信 |
| [01:43] | these two idiots actually believe this story.” | 这两个傻逼真的相信这个故事” |
| [01:51] | And then what happe… Aw! | 然后呢… |
| [01:53] | Damn it! | 我靠 |
| [01:54] | It’s not that complicated. | 哪有这么复杂啊 |
| [01:56] | The first time you masturbate thinking about the school nurse | 你第一次自慰的时候意淫了学校的护士 |
| [01:59] | you pretty much know. | 就大概知道了吧 |
| [02:00] | Oh, my God, I’m a lesbian. | 天啊 我也是拉拉 |
| [02:06] | We need to start hanging out with girls who aren’t gay. | 我们不应该继续跟拉拉一起玩了 |
| [02:08] | Or related to us. | 或没有血缘关系的 |
| [02:10] | How ’bout her? | 她怎么样 |
| [02:13] | Oh, I suppose I could go talk to her. | 我愿意去跟她聊聊啦 |
| [02:15] | I think Jenny was talking about me. | 珍妮是在跟我说吧 |
| [02:17] | Oh, really? | 是吗 |
| [02:18] | And you assume that just because you’re rich and good-looking? | 就凭你又富又帅 她就是在叫你上吗 |
| [02:20] | No, I was going to say smart and charming, | 没 我本来是打算说聪明 帅气 |
| [02:22] | but if you mix all those ingredients together, | 不过再加上我的富裕等等的 |
| [02:24] | you make one delicious hot guy pie. | 不就形成了我这可口的性感帅哥吗 |
| [02:28] | Well, your “hot guy pie” is no match for my system. | 你的”可口性感帅哥”也没我的招式好使 |
| [02:31] | No, hold on. | 不 等等 |
| [02:31] | Going on Craigslist and looking up “escorts” | 上综合信息网搜妓女 |
| [02:33] | isn’t a system. | 不算是个招 |
| [02:34] | That is not my system, | 那才不是我的招 |
| [02:35] | that is my backup plan. | 那是我的后备计划 |
| [02:37] | My system consists of the three “C”s: | 我的招里有三个小招 |
| [02:40] | connect, charm and cry. | 情感连接 讨人喜欢 泪流满面 |
| [02:43] | Works every time. | 百试不爽 |
| [02:44] | Uh, okay… | 好吧 |
| [02:45] | “Hi, my name’s Alan. | “你好 我叫艾伦 |
| [02:47] | that is a beautiful blouse you’re wearing. | 你身上穿的美丽上衣 |
| [02:49] | My dead wife was buried in one just like it.” | 跟我死去的妻子的寿衣是一模一样” |
| [02:54] | Yeah, my system’s a lot simpler. | 我的招就很简单了 |
| [02:55] | I wait for you to finish talking | 等到你跟人家说完屁话 |
| [02:56] | and then I take them home. | 我就直接上前把妞带回家 |
| [02:58] | Oh, oh, big words coming from somebody sitting alone next to me. | 哎哟 吹风风大也不怕闪了舌头 |
| [03:01] | Okay, fine. Well, let’s just go see who she likes better. | 行 那我们就去试试 看她比较喜欢谁 |
| [03:08] | Oh, my God. | 我的天啊 |
| [03:09] | No one is safe. | 谁都会被她撬走啊 |
| [03:30] | Hey, do you think all women are potentially lesbians? | 你觉得每个女人都有变拉拉的可能吗 |
| [03:33] | Um, I have 30 years | 以我30年来 |
| [03:35] | of masturbating to porn that say yes. | 对拉拉黄片自慰的丰富经验 有可能 |
| [03:39] | You know, you brag more about your masturbating prowess | 你是我所有认识的人里最爱吹嘘自己 |
| [03:42] | than any person I know. | 打飞机事迹的人 |
| [03:44] | It ain’t bragging if it’s true. | 都是事实 何来吹嘘之有 |
| [03:46] | Ooh. Alpha bravo, two bogeys on your six. | AB队 六点钟方向有敌踪 |
| [03:50] | Why are you talking like that? | 你干嘛这么说话 |
| [03:51] | Oh, my… Did you have a stroke? | 不是吧 你中风了吗 |
| [03:54] | It’s airplane talk. | 这是飞行用语啦 |
| [03:55] | I’m your wingman. | 我是你的僚机驾驶员 |
| [03:56] | It… it just means two cute girls just walked in. | 我的意思是有两个可爱妞走进来了 |
| [03:59] | Why didn’t you just say two cute girls just walked in? | 那你就直说不就行了吗 |
| [04:01] | Roger that. | 收到 |
| [04:02] | – Will you stop that? – Over and out. | -别这么说话了 -通话完毕 |
| [04:09] | They are cute. | 她们很可爱啊 |
| [04:09] | So, uh… so what’s the play here? | 所以我们怎么下手 |
| [04:11] | Um, uh… how about something like, uh… | 要不要来个… |
| [04:13] | “Hey, uh, those seats are taken, | “你们好 你们的位置有人坐了 |
| [04:15] | but our faces aren’t”? | 但我们的俏脸还有空哦” |
| [04:19] | How about, “I’m Walden, | 不如这样吧 “我叫沃顿 |
| [04:20] | and this is my mute friend Alan”? | 这位是我的哑巴朋友艾伦” |
| [04:24] | Fine. | 行 |
| [04:25] | You think you’ve got such great game, lead the way, | 你觉得自己这么行 都听你的吧 |
| [04:27] | Mr. “I’m too good for Craigslist and masturbating.” | “老子不屑招妓与自慰”先生 |
| [04:33] | Hi. | 你们好 |
| [04:34] | Hi. | 你好 |
| [04:41] | That’s all I got. | 我就这一招 |
| [04:44] | Uh, ladies, uh, uh, how much does a polar bear weigh? | 女士们 一只北极熊有多重呢 |
| [04:47] | Oh, I don’t know. | 不知道 |
| [04:48] | Enough to break the ice. I’m Dr. Alan Harper. | 够为我们的友谊破冰了 我是艾伦·哈波医师 |
| [04:51] | Uh, this is my associate Walden Schmidt. | 他是我的同事 沃顿·施密特 |
| [04:53] | Google him, he’s rich. | 上网查他 他超有钱 |
| [04:55] | If you Google me, you can see my boobs. | 如果你上网搜我 可以搜到我的咪咪 |
| [04:59] | Also if you do this. | 这么做也看得到 |
| [05:01] | Hi. | 你们好啊 |
| [05:03] | Oh, oh, uh, take another look, | 再看一遍 |
| [05:04] | but this time spell “Attic.” | 但这次一遍拼出”阁楼” |
| [05:07] | A-t-t-I-c. | a t t i c[我看见咪咪] |
| [05:10] | Oh! I get it. | 我懂了 |
| [05:13] | Because these are my tee-tees | 因为这是我的咪咪 |
| [05:14] | and I see them. | 而我看见它们了 |
| [05:17] | I’m sorry about my friend. | 抱歉 我朋友太失礼了 |
| [05:21] | – Walden. – Jill. | -我叫沃顿 -我叫吉儿 |
| [05:23] | So, Alan, what kind of doctor are you? | 艾伦 你是哪一科的医生 |
| [05:25] | Oh, I’m a…a chiropractor… | 我是脊椎按摩师 |
| [05:27] | slash brain surgeon. | 兼脑外科医生 |
| [05:30] | So, uh, w-what do you guys do? | 你们是干什么的 |
| [05:32] | We’re princesses at a theme park. | 我们是主题公园的公主 |
| [05:34] | Really? | 真的吗 |
| [05:35] | Yeah, I play Cinderella | 是的 我扮演灰姑娘 |
| [05:37] | and she’s the Little Mermaid. | 她扮演小美人鱼 |
| [05:38] | Oh, well, that certainly makes sense | 这分配当然合理啊 |
| [05:40] | because, uh, you “swept” my friend off his feet | 因为我的朋友拜倒在你的公主裙下 |
| [05:43] | and-and I’m “hooked” On you. | 而我把你”勾”上了 |
| [05:46] | Oh, my God, that’s funny | 天啊 说得太好了 |
| [05:47] | – because I’m a fish. – Yes. | -因为我就是一条鱼 -是啊 |
| [05:50] | The answer to the question you’re not asking is: | 你没问出口那个问题的答案是 |
| [05:52] | because she makes me look smart. | 跟她一起显得我聪明 |
| [05:55] | Well, the answer to the question you’re not asking is: | 你没问出口那个问题的答案是 |
| [05:57] | because he won’t move out. | 他在我家死赖着不走 |
| [06:04] | Morning. | 早安 |
| [06:05] | How great was last night? | 昨晚是不是很棒呀 |
| [06:06] | It was pretty good. | 是蛮不错的 |
| [06:08] | Those girls didn’t know what hit ’em. | 那俩妞都不知道把她们迷晕的是谁 |
| [06:09] | What’d you use, chloroform or Tasers? | 你用了什么 是麻醉要还是电击枪 |
| [06:13] | I will have you know | 我告诉你吧 |
| [06:14] | that Walden and I have dates tonight | 我和沃顿昨晚跟 |
| [06:15] | with two theme park princesses. | 两个主题公园的公主约会 |
| [06:17] | Mine’s Cinderella. | 我的是灰姑娘 |
| [06:19] | Perfect for you. | 绝配啊 |
| [06:21] | Storybook beauty. | 童话书美女 |
| [06:23] | And mine is the Little Mermaid. | 我的是小美人鱼 |
| [06:25] | Perfect for you. | 绝配啊 |
| [06:26] | No legs to run away. | 没有腿 不用怕她会跑 |
| [06:31] | I’m telling you, if we play our cards right, | 如果我们今晚好好表现 |
| [06:33] | we’re gonna get ourselves some fairy-tail. | 没准我们能给自己来点”童话”[式性交] |
| [06:37] | “Fairy-tail”? | “童话” |
| [06:38] | Because, you know, “tail” has two meanings. | 对啊 “话”有两个意思 |
| [06:41] | Yeah, so does “fairy.” | 那个”童”字也有”同[性恋]”的意思 |
| [06:45] | Hey, guys. | 各位早啊 |
| [06:47] | This is Maria. | 这位是玛利亚 |
| [06:48] | Maria, this is Walden and Alan. | 玛利亚 这是沃顿和艾伦 |
| [06:49] | Oh, that’s so cool. | 你家太酷了 |
| [06:50] | You didn’t tell me your parents were gay. | 你都不告诉我你的父母也是同性恋 |
| [06:55] | Didn’t I? | 我没说吗 |
| [06:56] | Dad and Mom. | 这是爸爸 那是妈妈 |
| [06:59] | – Hi. – It’s nice to meet you. | -你好 -很高兴认识你 |
| [07:00] | Uh, listen, I gotta go. | 我得走了 |
| [07:01] | But you are going to call me, right? | 但你会打给我的 对吧 |
| [07:03] | – Absolutely. – You sure? | -当然 -你保证吗 |
| [07:05] | Yes. | 当然 |
| [07:06] | I would not lie to you in front of my parents. | 我可不会当着父母的面骗你 |
| [07:10] | Bye, it was nice meeting you. | 再见 很高兴认识你们 |
| [07:12] | Don’t be a stranger, dear. | 别那么见外嘛 宝贝 |
| [07:16] | That’s not the girl you picked up in the bar last night. | 那不是你昨晚在酒吧勾搭的妞啊 |
| [07:18] | No, she delivered the pizza to me | 对 她是送披萨的 |
| [07:20] | and the girl I picked up at the bar last night. | 送给我和酒吧的那个妞 |
| [07:25] | Well, I hope you gave her a good tip. | 希望你给她的”小费”能让她满意 |
| [07:27] | Nah, she didn’t come in 30 minutes or less. | 没给 她半个小时之后才送达[高潮] |
| [07:38] | Fashion Police. Pull over. | 时尚警察出动 请靠边停 |
| [07:42] | What? | 干嘛 |
| [07:42] | The reason I stopped you | 我拦下你的原因是 |
| [07:44] | is it appears your style has expired. | 你的衣着风格已经过时了 |
| [07:49] | You don’t like this sweater? I thought it looked good. | 你不喜欢这件毛衣吗 我觉得还行啊 |
| [07:51] | Have you been drinking, sir? | 你刚喝酒喝傻了吗 先生 |
| [07:54] | This coming from a man | 一个穿着灭白蚁 |
| [07:55] | who looks like he’s been tented for termites. | 用的帐篷的人也好意思说我 |
| [08:04] | – Lyndsey. – Hi, Alan. | -林赛 -艾伦 |
| [08:06] | Uh, did we have plans for tonight? | 我们今晚有安排吗 |
| [08:08] | No, I was in the area | 没有 我只是刚好来这边 |
| [08:09] | and I thought I’d surprise you with a booty call. | 想给你来一个”惊喜快炮” |
| [08:12] | – Well, normally that would be delightful, but… – Wait. | -通常我会很高兴 但 -慢着 |
| [08:16] | You’re wearing cologne and your one good shirt. | 你喷了古龙水 还穿上你唯一一件好衣裳 |
| [08:21] | You have a date. | 你今晚有约会 |
| [08:23] | Oh, no, I-I wouldn’t call it a date, you know, uh, um… | 不 我不会称其为约会 |
| [08:27] | Walden met this woman, | 沃顿要跟一个女人见面 |
| [08:28] | and she’s got a friend, really ugly. | 她碰巧有个朋友 超级丑的 |
| [08:32] | You know how they say, you know, | 常言道 |
| [08:33] | people were beaten with the ugly stick? | 有种人是被丑棍打过的 |
| [08:35] | Well… well, you know, | 意思就是 |
| [08:37] | if you took a bunch of the ugly sticks | 如果你用一堆丑棍 |
| [08:39] | and built an ugly house, | 建造一座丑房子 |
| [08:40] | when this girl walked by, | 当这个女人经过的时候 |
| [08:42] | the house would call her ugly. | 就连房子都会说她丑 |
| [08:47] | Alan, relax. | 艾伦 别紧张 |
| [08:49] | – You’re allowed to date. – Oh, really? | -你可以跟人约会 -真的吗 |
| [08:52] | Of course. I mean, I have a boyfriend. | 当然 我自己也有男朋友啊 |
| [08:53] | Oh, thank God, ’cause this girl is actually way hot. | 谢天谢地 这妞其实超性感的 |
| [08:57] | I mean, you know, not as hot as you, | 我是说 当然没有你性感 |
| [08:59] | but, you know, young-hot. | 但她是年轻那种性感 |
| [09:03] | You’ve been hot a lot longer. | 你性感的时候 她还没出生呢 |
| [09:09] | I’m gonna go. | 我要走了 |
| [09:11] | You sure you’re okay with this? | 你确定你没意见吗 |
| [09:12] | I’m sure. Go have fun. | 当然 好好玩吧 |
| [09:17] | Oh, that’s my good old Lyndsey. | 这才是我旧时[老]的好宝贝 |
| [09:19] | I didn’t mean “old”! | 我不是说你老啊 |
| [09:25] | Idiot Police. Pull over. | 蠢货警察出动 请靠边停 |
| [09:33] | God, it’s great out here. | 天啊 这里真棒 |
| [09:35] | The stars look amazing. | 星星看起来真美 |
| [09:37] | Yeah, without the lights from the city, they really pop. | 是啊 没有城市的灯光 星星更加闪耀 |
| [09:39] | That’s why you can see Orion’s Belt so clearly. | 怪不得能清楚看到猎户座的腰带区 |
| [09:42] | Uh, you know, if you look under Orion’s Belt, | 如果你往下看 |
| [09:45] | uh, you can see his Little Dipper. | 你可以看见他的小熊[鸡鸡]星 |
| [09:48] | Oh, my God, you are so bad. | 天啊 你太坏了 |
| [09:50] | You’re into astronomy? | 你喜欢天文学吗 |
| [09:51] | ‘Cause I’ve been into astronomy | 因为我参加了太空营后 |
| [09:53] | since I went to space camp. | 就迷上了天文学 |
| [09:54] | Also about the same time I got into | 同一时间 我也被 |
| [09:56] | getting my ass kicked at school. | 学校里的人欺负 |
| [09:59] | I always wanted to go to space camp. | 我一直想参加太空营 |
| [10:02] | Nerd! | 书呆 |
| [10:04] | I prefer “Geek.” | 我更喜欢”极客”这个称呼 |
| [10:07] | Wh-What about you, Laurie? | 那你呢 劳里 |
| [10:08] | Are you into astronomy? | 你喜欢天文学吗 |
| [10:10] | Yep, I’m a Virgo. | 喜欢 我是处女座的 |
| [10:12] | But I’m not a virgin. | 但我不是处女了哦 |
| [10:16] | Both good signs for me. | 这两者对我来说都是好事 |
| [10:18] | So, uh, how did you become a princess, anyway? | 话说你们俩怎么会去干公主这一行的 |
| [10:21] | Oh, I get that a lot. | 我经常被问到这个问题 |
| [10:24] | I’m not a real princess. | 我不是真的公主 |
| [10:27] | I’m also not a real redhead. | 也不是真的红发妞 |
| [10:29] | You’ll find that out later. | 等会儿你就知道啦[体毛] |
| [10:33] | No way, it must be great being a princess. | 怎么会 扮演公主一定很不错吧 |
| [10:35] | Yeah, for the most part. | 是啊 多数情况下挺好的 |
| [10:37] | What’s not so great are the pervy dads | 除了有时一些变态大叔 |
| [10:39] | who are trying to cop a feel. | 会偷偷过来摸一把 |
| [10:41] | The other day I was like, | 前几天我还说呢 |
| [10:42] | “do that again, you’re gonna find out | “再敢过来 就让你知道 |
| [10:44] | where else my glass slipper fits.” | 我的水晶鞋还能塞进哪里” |
| [10:46] | Is it weird that that turns me on? | 听得我都”蠢蠢欲动”了 奇怪吧 |
| [10:48] | Is it weird that’s why I told you? | 所以我才说给你听的 奇怪吧 |
| [10:51] | So, hey, would you girls like a little more champagne? | 两位美女要不要添点香槟 |
| [10:53] | Oh, I would! | 我要 |
| [10:54] | I love champagne. | 我喜欢香槟 |
| [10:55] | And puppies! | 还有小狗狗 |
| [10:57] | Um, what’s the magic word? | 咒语是什么来着 |
| [11:00] | Oh… boobs! | 咪咪 |
| [11:02] | Ah, the kids must love you. | 孩子们一定很喜欢你 |
| [11:10] | I really like Jill. | 我真的好喜欢吉儿 |
| [11:11] | I mean, she’s fun, she’s beautiful, she’s smart. | 她风趣 漂亮 又聪明 |
| [11:14] | And I really like Laurie– | 我真的好喜欢劳里 |
| [11:15] | she’s fun, she’s beautiful, she’s stupid. | 她风趣 漂亮 又白痴 |
| [11:18] | So, uh, what’s the next move? | 那接下来怎么做 |
| [11:20] | I’m gonna take Jill up to my room and show her my telescope. | 我要带吉儿去我房间看天文望远镜 |
| [11:23] | What am I gonna do? | 我怎么办 |
| [11:24] | There’s nothing in my room to show Laurie. | 我房里没有劳里可看的东西 |
| [11:25] | Yes, there is. | 你有啊 |
| [11:26] | You have a couch that turns into a bed. | 你有一个能变成床的沙发 |
| [11:28] | She’ll be amazed. | 她一定会超惊讶 |
| [11:33] | Okay, open your eyes. | 好啦 睁开眼睛 |
| [11:36] | Oh, my God! | 我的天啊 |
| [11:37] | Where’d the couch go? | 那个沙发去哪了 |
| [11:41] | A magician never reveals his secrets. | 魔术师从不透露秘诀的 |
| [11:44] | That’s amazing. | 真是太棒了 |
| [11:45] | And for my next trick, | 下一个魔术节目 |
| [11:47] | I’m going to make my penis disappear. | 我要把老二变消失 |
| [11:50] | I’ll need a volunteer from the audience. | 我要从现场观众中选一位搭档 |
| [11:52] | Ooh, pick me, pick me! | 选我吧 选我吧 |
| [12:01] | Oh, sorry, um… | 抱歉 |
| [12:03] | Uh, my mom. | 我妈打来的 |
| [12:05] | No problem. | 没关系 |
| [12:06] | I’ll go put in a condom. | 我去塞个安全套 |
| [12:09] | Uh, uh, that’s not how… | 其实不是… |
| [12:11] | You know what? Great. | 你猜怎么着 太好了 |
| [12:15] | Lyndsey? | 林赛 |
| [12:16] | Alan? Thanks for calling. | 艾伦 谢谢你打电话来 |
| [12:19] | You called me. | 是你在打给我 |
| [12:20] | Oh, that’s good ’cause I was just gonna call you. | 那太好了 因为我正想给你打电话 |
| [12:22] | Lyndsey, you’re drunk. | 林赛 你喝多了 |
| [12:24] | Alan, you’re boring. | 艾伦 你真没劲 |
| [12:26] | – Okay, I’m gonna go. – Whoa, whoa, wait! | -好吧 我要挂了 -等下 |
| [12:28] | Just one thing. | 还有一件事 |
| [12:30] | Remember when I told you I was okay | 记得我说你和别人约会 |
| [12:31] | with you dating other people? | 我不介意吗 |
| [12:34] | Well, I’m not. | 其实我介意 |
| [12:35] | You’re not? | 你介意吗 |
| [12:38] | I’m ready for your next trick. | 我准备好看你下个魔术啦 |
| [12:42] | Can I call you back? I’m… | 我等会打给你好吗 我… |
| [12:44] | going into a tunnel. | 要进隧道[阴道]了 |
| [12:55] | So, what do you think of your princess? | 你觉得你的公主如何啊 |
| [12:58] | I think I am enchanted. | 我想我被她迷住了 |
| [13:00] | And engorged. | 也被她吃掉了 |
| [13:02] | Well, let’s see about giving this story a happy ending. | 接下来 我们给故事一个”美满的结局”吧 |
| [13:07] | Uh, can you hold on for a second? | 等[握]一会好吗 |
| [13:10] | Uh, not what I meant. | 我不是这个意思 |
| [13:11] | But… big thumbs-up. | 但是给你竖大拇指哦 |
| [13:15] | It was a… | 这是… |
| [13:17] | It was a metaphorical thumbs-up. | 我是指比喻意义上的大拇指 |
| [13:19] | Uh, and-and you work with children. | 你的工作不是陪小孩子吗 |
| [13:22] | Is everything all right? | 有什么问题吗 |
| [13:23] | Uh, yeah, yeah, uh, uh, can you just, uh, hang on a minute? | 没有问题 稍微等一下好吗 |
| [13:26] | I’ve got to freshen up. | 我要去梳洗一下 |
| [13:27] | Oh, the bathroom’s right there. | 浴室在这边 |
| [13:29] | Yeah, no, I have to… | 是啊 不过我要 |
| [13:31] | poop. | 大便 |
| [13:37] | Check out this star. | 看看这个星星[明星] |
| [13:39] | Is that the guy from Survivor? | 这是《幸存者》的主持人吗 |
| [13:41] | Yeah, Jeff Probst. | 对 杰夫·普罗斯特 |
| [13:44] | He’s naked and cooking… | 他光着身子在做… |
| [13:46] | bacon? | 培根吗 |
| [13:47] | Yeah, he does it every night. | 是的 他每天晚上都这样 |
| [13:48] | It’s a regular bacon and sausage fest. | 每日的培根香肠大餐 |
| [13:51] | And why do you watch? | 那你为什么要看他呢 |
| [13:54] | Uh, there’s not much on TV. | 电视上没什么好看的 |
| [13:55] | But… more importantly… | 但是 更重要的是 |
| [13:57] | I think he wants me to. | 我觉得他想让我看 |
| [13:59] | Well, maybe if there was something better | 如果还有更好看的东西 |
| [14:02] | for you to look at? | 可以看呢 |
| [14:06] | Walden! Walden! | 沃顿 沃顿 |
| [14:08] | I know! Probst is cooking. | 我知道 普罗斯特在做饭 |
| [14:12] | No, no! It-it’s an emergency. | 不是的 我有急事 |
| [14:15] | I’m sorry, it’s… | 抱歉 |
| [14:20] | – What? – Lyndsey called me. | -什么事 -林赛刚打给我 |
| [14:22] | – Oh, my God. – Yeah. | -天啊 -是真的 |
| [14:23] | Why didn’t you say that from the beginning? | 你一开始怎么不说 |
| [14:32] | She told me she is not okay with me dating someone else. | 她说她介意我跟别人约会 |
| [14:35] | She has a boyfriend, okay? | 她都有男朋友了 好吗 |
| [14:37] | What she’s doing to you is not fair. | 她这样对你不公平 |
| [14:38] | So what should I do? | 那我该怎么办 |
| [14:39] | You should do what every boy in America has dreamed about doing, | 你应该去做每个美国男人做梦都想做的事 |
| [14:41] | and go downstairs and bang the Little Mermaid. | 下楼上了那个小美人鱼 |
| [14:46] | You’re right. | 你说得对 |
| [14:47] | A bush in the hand and all that. | 一林在手 不能放走 |
| [14:49] | Well, I’d tell you to go screw her brains out, | 我建议你赶快大干一场 |
| [14:51] | but somebody already beat you to it. | 虽然早有人捷足先登了 |
| [14:57] | Aw, great. | 好吧 |
| [15:00] | Hi, Lynds. | 你好啊 林赛 |
| [15:02] | No, no, you have, uh, nothing to apologize for. | 不不 你不用向我道歉 |
| [15:05] | I-I sent her home. | 我把她送回去了 |
| [15:08] | You left a surprise for me? | 你给我准备了一个惊喜吗 |
| [15:11] | Oh… you didn’t have to do that. | 你不用这么客气的 |
| [15:14] | Surprise! | 惊喜 |
| [15:17] | – Lyndsey? – Yeah. | -林赛 -是我 |
| [15:19] | I felt bad about ruining your date | 搅了你的约会我过意不去 |
| [15:21] | so I wanted to make it up to you. | 所以我想补偿你 |
| [15:23] | Alan, where are you? | 艾伦 你在哪儿 |
| [15:26] | Who was that? | 谁在说话 |
| [15:27] | Oh, uh, that’s just a TV show I’m watching. | 是我在看的一个电视节目 |
| [15:28] | It’s called… | 叫做… |
| [15:30] | Alan, Where Are You? | 艾伦 你在哪里 |
| [15:32] | Um, well. You know what? | 好吧 听我说 |
| [15:33] | Thanks for dropping by, | 多谢你过来看我 |
| [15:34] | but I’m gonna have to take a rain check. | 但我们改天再约吧 |
| [15:35] | So I will see you soon. | 咱们过两天再见吧 |
| [15:37] | Are you done pooping? | 你拉完便便了吗 |
| [15:42] | Who the hell is this? | 这货是谁啊 |
| [15:44] | Ooh, I’m so sorry. | 真是对不起 |
| [15:46] | Is this your mom? | 这是你妈妈吗 |
| [15:49] | Bitch, you are gonna die! | 小贱人 你死定了 |
| [15:51] | Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. | 别这样 冷静 冷静 |
| [15:52] | I thought you said you sent the slut home. | 你不是说已经送这个荡妇回家了吗 |
| [15:55] | How does she know I’m a slut? | 她怎么知道我是荡妇 |
| [15:57] | Okay, okay, this-this is just a classic misunderstanding. | 好啦 这是很常见的误会啦 |
| [16:00] | It-it’s like a bad episode of Alan, Where Are You? | 很像《艾伦 你在哪里》中剧本很烂的一集 |
| [16:04] | You lied to me! | 你骗了我 |
| [16:05] | I was just about to kick her out. | 我正准备赶走她 |
| [16:07] | You were about to kick me out? | 你准备赶走我吗 |
| [16:09] | I wasn’t. I was. | 我没有 我有 |
| [16:10] | I wasn’t. | 我没有 |
| [16:12] | What is going on? | 出什么事了 |
| [16:14] | Alan’s mom thinks I’m a slut. | 艾伦的妈妈觉得我是荡妇 |
| [16:17] | Alan’s cheating on me. | 艾伦背着我偷人 |
| [16:18] | Uh, you have a boyfriend! | 你有男友的好吧 |
| [16:20] | Now who’s the slut? | 谁才是真正的荡妇呀 |
| [16:22] | Okay, maybe… | 好啦 也许 |
| [16:24] | we should just get our things and go. | 我们还是拿上东西走人吧 |
| [16:25] | No, no, no, no, no, no! | 别这样别这样 |
| [16:26] | Don’t-don’t get your things. | 别拿上你的东西 |
| [16:27] | I like your things. | 我喜欢你的”东西” |
| [16:28] | I haven’t even seen your things. | 我还没机会看到你的”东西”呢 |
| [16:31] | I really think we should call it a night. | 我真的觉得今晚就到这里吧 |
| [16:33] | No, Alan, do something! | 艾伦 快想办法 |
| [16:35] | Uh, o-okay, what we’re gonna do is… | 好吧 我们这么办 |
| [16:47] | Must have vagina! | 一定要洞洞 |
| [16:56] | Morning. | 早上好 |
| [16:56] | Hey, sorry for puking in the living room last night. | 抱歉昨晚我吐在了客厅 |
| [16:59] | What? | 什么 |
| [17:01] | I think I just drank a little too much. | 我想我喝得有点多了 |
| [17:03] | Oh, th-that wasn’t you. That was Lyndsey. | 不是你 是林赛吐的 |
| [17:05] | Oh, awesome! | 太棒了 |
| [17:07] | Guess who doesn’t have a drinking problem. | 猜猜谁没有酗酒的问题 |
| [17:11] | – Morning. – Morning. | -早上好 -早上好 |
| [17:14] | Sorry again about last night. | 对于昨晚的事 我再次道歉 |
| [17:15] | You know what? I really liked Jill. | 知道吗 我真的喜欢吉儿 |
| [17:18] | What happened was out of my control. | 但事情超出了我的控制范围 |
| [17:20] | No, it wasn’t! | 不 没有 |
| [17:21] | This whole non-relationship relationship thing | 你和林赛之间这种 |
| [17:24] | you have going on with Lyndsey is ridiculous. | 非恋爱的恋爱关系 实在是太荒谬了 |
| [17:26] | And now it’s affecting me. | 现在居然影响到我了 |
| [17:27] | You owe me a princess and an area rug. | 你欠我一位公主 还有一块小地毯 |
| [17:31] | – What happened? – I’ll tell you what happened. | -出什么事了 -我告诉你什么事 |
| [17:33] | Nothing. | 屁事没有 |
| [17:34] | The only person who got hot, drunk sex last night | 昨晚唯一享受热辣醉酒性爱的人 |
| [17:36] | was Lyndsey’s boyfriend. | 是林赛的男友 |
| [17:38] | Actually… | 事实上… |
| [17:39] | Okay, fine. Him and you. | 好吧 他和你两个 |
| [17:41] | – Well… – Aw, damn it! | -不是显摆… -我操 |
| [17:54] | Lyndsey, can we talk? | 林赛 可以谈谈吗 |
| [17:55] | Sure, I’ve been puking at 20-minute intervals. | 当然 我的呕吐间隔是20分钟 |
| [17:57] | So… you got eight minutes. | 所以 你有8分钟时间 |
| [18:01] | Look, a-about last night… | 昨晚的事 |
| [18:03] | I-I am really sorry. | 真是对不起 |
| [18:05] | I-I was totally out of line. | 我实在是越界了 |
| [18:07] | It’s just… I started picturing you | 只是我开始想象 |
| [18:09] | with some other girl and I got so jealous. | 你和别的女人在一起的样子 我好妒忌 |
| [18:11] | I mean… | 我意思是 |
| [18:13] | isn’t that crazy? | 这是不是太离谱了 |
| [18:14] | It’s you. | 我居然为你吃醋 |
| [18:17] | Ouch, there was an iron fist in that velvet glove. | 太伤了 夸我夸出了损我的感觉 |
| [18:21] | Um, look. | 听着 |
| [18:24] | I want to be with you. | 我想和你在一起 |
| [18:25] | And this whole thing with me, | 你和我还有莱瑞之间 |
| [18:27] | you and Larry just isn’t working anymore. | 复杂的关系不能再继续下去了 |
| [18:31] | So what are you saying? | 你想说什么 |
| [18:33] | I’m saying it’s-it’s either me or him. | 我想说 要么选我 要么选他 |
| [18:36] | Well, it’s not that simple. | 没这么简单 |
| [18:38] | I can’t just choose. | 我不能随便选一个 |
| [18:40] | I guess you already did. | 我想你已经选了 |
| [18:43] | Good-bye, Lyndsey. | 再见 林赛 |
| [18:45] | – Alan, wait. – Yeah? | -艾伦 等等 -什么事 |
| [18:49] | I-I choose you. | 我选你 |
| [18:52] | – Really? – Yeah. | -真的吗 -是的 |
| [18:54] | -Oh, you make me so happy. – You make me happy, too. | -你让我好开心 -你也让我好开心 |
| [18:57] | So, you gonna break up with Larry? | 你会和莱瑞分手吗 |
| [18:59] | – Yes. – Aw, great. | -是的 -太好了 |
| [19:01] | It feels so good to be back in your arms. | 能重回你的怀抱感觉太好了 |
| [19:03] | Yeah… | 是啊 |
| [19:04] | Hold on. | 等等 |
| [19:09] | Oh, hold my hair! | 帮我把头发拨上去 |
| [19:14] | Oh, it’s just like old times. | 重温美好回忆 |
| [19:32] | Yeah, wow. | 是啊 没想到 |
| [19:35] | That was, uh… | 刚才真是 |
| [19:36] | – Boring. – Very. | -好无趣 -非常无趣 |
| [19:39] | What was missing? | 少了什么 |
| [19:42] | – Larry. – Larry. | -莱瑞 -莱瑞 |
| [19:46] | Knowing we’re not supposed to have sex made it way hotter. | 禁忌性爱的感觉太美妙了 |
| [19:48] | It really did. | 的确是的 |
| [19:50] | You think maybe Larry would take you back? | 你觉得莱瑞会和你复合吗 |
| [19:53] | – I haven’t told him yet. – Smart. | -我还没跟他说 -太聪明了 |
| [19:57] | Now that we both know that Larry’s still in the picture, | 现在我们都知道莱瑞没有出局 |
| [20:01] | maybe we should try again. | 也许我们应该再试一次 |
| [20:02] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [20:04] | I promise this time I won’t fake my orgasm. | 我保证这次不会假装到了高潮 |
| [20:06] | Oh, then neither will I. | 那我也不会 |
| [20:16] | Walden. | 沃顿 |
| [20:17] | Can you help me, miss? | 能帮我一个忙吗 女士 |
| [20:18] | A beautiful woman fled my house last night | 一位漂亮的姑娘昨晚从我家匆匆离开 能确定 |
| [20:21] | and the only clue I have to her identity | 她身份的唯一线索 |
| [20:24] | is this shoe she left behind. | 就是她留下的鞋子 |
| [20:27] | Oh, that’s very sweet, but this isn’t a good time. | 你真是太浪漫了 但现在不太方便 |
| [20:31] | Why, is it…? | 为什么 这是… |
| [20:34] | Do I smell bacon? | 我闻到了培根味道吗 |
| [20:36] | You should go. | 你走吧 |
| [20:38] | Everything okay, babe? | 没事吧 宝贝 |
| [20:42] | I just need a second. | 我需要点时间 |
| [20:44] | All right. | 好的 |
| [20:45] | Bacon’s ready. | 培根好了哦 |
| [20:50] | I’m sorry. | 对不起 |
| [20:53] | Damn you, Probst. | 去你的 普罗斯特 |