| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | So, what happened between you and your girl? | 你和你女朋友怎么了 |
| [00:04] | She wanted to get married, and I’m just not sure I’m ready. | 她想结婚 而我却不确定我是否准备好了 |
| [00:07] | That’s the same reason I lost Lyndsey. | 我跟林赛分手也是因为这个 |
| [00:08] | You got to get her back. | 那你得把她追回来 |
| [00:09] | Don’t make the same mistake I did. | 不要犯跟我一样的错误 |
| [00:11] | I am gonna ask Lyndsey to marry me. | 我要向林赛求婚 |
| [00:14] | Yeah, I just have to get a ring. | 对 我买枚戒指就成 |
| [00:15] | I got a ring you could have. | 我有枚戒指你可以用 |
| [00:16] | You must be here to see your friend Larry, | 你一定是来这里找你朋友拉里的 |
| [00:18] | who is also here. | 因为他也在这里 |
| [00:21] | Lyndsey MacElroy, will you marry me? | 林赛·麦克罗伊 你愿意嫁给我吗 |
| [00:24] | Yes, I will marry you! | 愿意愿意 我愿意嫁给你 |
| [00:32] | What’s going on down here? | 你在楼下干什么呢 |
| [00:34] | I got up to pee and I heard moaning. | 我起来撒尿 却听到了呻吟声 |
| [00:36] | No, you heard crying. | 你听到的是哭泣声 |
| [00:41] | And moaning. | 以及呻吟声 |
| [00:42] | You’re watching porn at 3:00 in the morning? | 你凌晨3点还在看黄片吗 |
| [00:45] | No, it’s that soft-core flick | 不 这只是林赛在90年代 |
| [00:47] | that Lyndsey made back in the ’90s, | 拍摄的轻口味色情片 |
| [00:49] | Cinnamon’s Buns. | 《肉桂小骚包》 |
| [00:52] | Nothing brings me back like hearing her fake an orgasm. | 她假装高潮的呻吟 真是引起我无限回忆 |
| [00:55] | Oh, listen, I know that breakups are hard, but… | 我知道最难过的事莫过于分手 可是 |
| [00:58] | Uh, please tell me those were for crying. | 求你告诉我纸巾是你擦眼泪用的 |
| [01:01] | Oh, yes, yes, uh, yes. | 是的是的 |
| [01:02] | Uh, uh, crying, yes, very upset, very upset, yes. | 擦的都是眼泪 我好伤心 好难过哦 |
| [01:06] | Wow, you know, you’re a classy guy, Alan. | 你真实个”上档次”的好男人 艾伦 |
| [01:08] | It’s hard to understand why she accepted | 我真想不通为什么她接受了 |
| [01:10] | Larry’s proposal and not yours. | 拉里的求婚 而拒绝了你 |
| [01:12] | Technically, I never actually proposed. | 老实说 其实我没有真的求婚 |
| [01:15] | What? | 什么 |
| [01:16] | Well, when I got there he was already doing it, | 我到她家时 拉里已经求婚了 |
| [01:18] | so I just figured I’d chalk this one up as another loss | 所以我想就把它当成又一次的失败 |
| [01:21] | and move on. | 忘掉就好 |
| [01:22] | Universe 82,223; | 老天爷得了82223分 |
| [01:25] | Alan 12. | 艾伦十二分 |
| [01:27] | Come on, you’re exaggerating. | 拜托 你也太夸张了 |
| [01:29] | You have not had 12 victories. | 你不可能有十二次胜利 |
| [01:32] | Yes, I have. Uh, my son, | 真的有 我的儿子算一次 |
| [01:34] | plus the number of years I’ve lived here rent-free. | 再加上我在这里白住的年数 |
| [01:38] | I can’t believe you just stood there | 真不敢相信你就这么眼睁睁 |
| [01:40] | while another guy proposed to your girl | 看着别的男人向你的女友求婚 |
| [01:41] | and you didn’t say anything. | 你却一言不发 |
| [01:42] | There’s nothing I can do about it. | 我无能为力啊 |
| [01:44] | Larry’s the one frosting her muffins now. | 现在轮到拉里在她的小蛋糕[阴道]上”抹糖霜”了 |
| [01:47] | Have we learned nothing from Cinnamon’s Buns? | 《肉桂小骚包》对我们一点启迪都没有吗 |
| [01:51] | She told Master Baker no five times! | 剧中她拒绝了”烘焙大湿”整整五次 |
| [01:56] | Did he listen? No! | 他有就此罢休吗 没有 |
| [01:59] | No, the only reason Lyndsey settled for Larry | 林赛答应和拉里在一起的原因 |
| [02:02] | is ’cause she didn’t know she could settle for you! | 就是因为她不知道还可以和你在一起 |
| [02:06] | You’re right. I mean, you’re a handsome billionaire, | 你说得对 你这么高富帅的人 |
| [02:07] | and you settled for me. | 最后也和我在一起了 |
| [02:09] | She’s just a-a-a divorced, | 她不过是个离了婚的 |
| [02:11] | middle-aged lush… | 中年醉妇 |
| [02:13] | …of my dreams. | 也是我的梦中情人 |
| [02:16] | That’s the spirit! Now, get up and… | 这才像话 现在你站起来 |
| [02:18] | wash your hands and… | 把手洗干净 |
| [02:20] | burn this couch, and go get your… | 烧掉这张沙发 然后去抢回 |
| [02:22] | surprisingly flexible girlfriend back. | 你那个柔软度超乎想象的女友吧 |
| [02:24] | You’re right, you’re right. Thanks, Walden. | 你说得对 谢谢了沃顿 |
| [02:26] | Oh, Master Baker, | 烘焙大湿 |
| [02:28] | would you like to watch while I train this lovely young maiden | 你想看看我如何训练这位可爱的小女仆 |
| [02:31] | to churn your butter? | “搅拌”你的黄油吗 |
| [02:33] | Maybe one more scene. | 再看一段好了 |
| [02:36] | This is a pivotal part of the film. | 这是全剧最关键的地方 |
| [02:40] | You might need this. | 你也许会用到这个 |
| [02:43] | This scene’s a real tear… jerker. | 这一段尤其催人”泪”下 |
| [03:00] | Hey, Berta, how about a cup of coffee? | 波塔 来杯咖啡吧 |
| [03:03] | No, thanks, I just had a cup. | 不用了 我刚才喝过 |
| [03:07] | I don’t know why you keep her on payroll. | 我不懂你干嘛还付薪水给她 |
| [03:09] | Says the guy I pay to be my assistant. | 我也付钱给你当我助理了啊 |
| [03:12] | Oh, oh, that’s still a thing? | 这段雇佣关系还存在吗 |
| [03:14] | Oh, oh, cup of joe coming right up, boss. | 您咖啡马上就来 老板 |
| [03:18] | Hey, what are you doing there? | 你在这里干什么呢 |
| [03:20] | I’m making breakfast in bed for Brooke. | 我在为布鲁克做早餐 |
| [03:22] | Hey, what tastes good on boobs? | 什么东西放在胸部上吃起来味道最好 |
| [03:24] | – Pineapple rings are always fun. – Yeah. | -菠萝圈吃起来最有趣 -没错 |
| [03:27] | You get the room nice and cold, and you play ring toss. | 把房间温度调低 就可以玩投圈的游戏 |
| [03:29] | Yeah, and with Brooke’s bad boys, you could… | 没错 以布鲁克那对宝贝来说 你可以 |
| [03:32] | Omaha! Omaha! | 奥马哈 奥马哈 |
| [03:37] | – What? – Nothing. | -你说什么 -没什么 |
| [03:39] | We weren’t talking about your boobs. | 我们绝对没在讨论你的胸部 |
| [03:41] | Why not? You stare at ’em enough. | 为什么不讨论呢 反正你也看得够多了 |
| [03:43] | What? | 你说什么 |
| [03:46] | I don’t… I never… | 我没有…我才不会… |
| [03:48] | I’m sorry. | 好吧我有 |
| [03:50] | Where are you going? | 你要去哪里 |
| [03:51] | I got to get to work. | 我得去上班了 |
| [03:53] | You can’t leave– breakfast sex | 你不能走啊 早餐性爱 |
| [03:54] | – is the most important meal of the day. – Sorry. | -是每天最重要的一餐呢 -抱歉 |
| [03:57] | I’ll call you later, okay, babe? | 我晚点打给你 好吗 宝贝 |
| [04:00] | No worries. | 别担心 |
| [04:01] | Call me whenever you can. | 你有空时再打 |
| [04:02] | Oh, God, she’s dumping me. | 死了 她要和我分手了 |
| [04:05] | What are you talking about? | 你说什么呢 |
| [04:05] | Didn’t you just hear that? | 你没听见吗 |
| [04:07] | She’s “Going to work.” | 她要去”上班”了 |
| [04:09] | Okay, I know no one in this house is familiar with it, | 我知道这屋里的人对这事都不熟悉 |
| [04:12] | but “Going to work” is an actual thing. | 可”上班”是真实存在的事 |
| [04:17] | It’s kind of like “Paying rent”. | 就和”付房租”一样真实 |
| [04:22] | It’s not just that, it’s… | 不止这样而已 |
| [04:24] | it’s been forever since we’ve had sex. | 我们已经好久没爱爱了 |
| [04:26] | Well, how long is forever? | 你所谓的好久是多久 |
| [04:27] | Two days! | 整整两天了 |
| [04:29] | I hate you. | 我讨厌你 |
| [04:32] | Come on, you and Brooke are great together. | 拜托 你和布鲁克很配 |
| [04:33] | She’s not breaking up with you. | 她才不会跟你分手 |
| [04:35] | Uh, then again, maybe she is slipping away, | 但也有可能 她想要慢慢脱身了 |
| [04:37] | and you’re just gonna have to face the possibility | 你也只好面对下半生 |
| [04:38] | of being alone for the rest of your life. | 孤独终老的可能性 |
| [04:42] | Oh, my God! | 我的天 |
| [04:45] | What the hell’s the matter with you? | 你脑子有毛病啊 |
| [04:47] | Why would you say that to her? | 你干嘛要对她说那些话 |
| [04:48] | I’m just trying to prepare her | 我只不过是想让她 |
| [04:49] | for-for the harsh realities of real life. | 做好面对人生中的残酷现实的准备而已 |
| [04:52] | I mean, who else is gonna do it, her father? | 不然还有谁能告诉她 她爸吗 |
| [04:54] | He’s dead, Walden! | 他都死了 沃顿 |
| [04:56] | Why are you even here? I thought you were | 你怎么还在家 不是要去 |
| [04:57] | gonna go win Lyndsey back. | 把林赛追回来吗 |
| [04:59] | It’s early. I want to win her back, | 还早呢 我是想把她追回来 |
| [05:01] | but I don’t want to spend the whole day with her. | 但我可不想一整天都跟她腻在一起 |
| [05:10] | Alan. | 艾伦 |
| [05:11] | Lyndsey MacElroy, I love you. | 林赛·麦克罗伊 我爱你 |
| [05:14] | You are my world. | 你就是我的全世界 |
| [05:16] | I want you to spend the rest of your life with me. | 我想你跟我厮守终身 |
| [05:20] | And Walden. | 以及沃顿 |
| [05:22] | You’re-you’re kidding, right? | 你 你在开玩笑吧 |
| [05:23] | – I’m engaged to Larry. – That’s not fair. | -我已经跟拉里订婚了 -这不公平 |
| [05:26] | I mean, if I hadn’t stopped at that gas station to poop, | 要不是我在加油站停车拉屎去了 |
| [05:28] | I would have been here first. | 我肯定比他先到 |
| [05:31] | Alan, don’t. | 艾伦 别这样 |
| [05:32] | Maybe this will change your mind. | 也许这个会让你改变心意 |
| [05:34] | Oh, Alan, it doesn’t matter what kind of ring… | 艾伦 不管你拿出什么样的戒指… |
| [05:36] | Holy crap, that thing’s huge! | 我靠 那”玩意”真大 |
| [05:40] | That’s what she said. | 别的妞也是这么说 |
| [05:43] | I know, not the right time. What do you say? | 我知道 时候不对 你觉得怎么样 |
| [05:45] | I say I’m marrying Larry. | 我还是要嫁给拉里 |
| [05:47] | – But why? – He loves me. | -为什么 -他爱我 |
| [05:49] | Not as much as I do. | 我更爱你 |
| [05:51] | He has his own house. | 他有自己的房子 |
| [05:52] | I… | 我 |
| [05:53] | love you. | 爱你啊 |
| [05:55] | I’m sorry, Alan. | 对不起 艾伦 |
| [05:57] | You-you really think Larry can make you happier than I can? | 你真认为拉里比我更能让你幸福吗 |
| [06:00] | I think I made the right decision. | 我认为我做出的决定是正确的 |
| [06:03] | You made your bed. | 你还铺了床呢 |
| [06:04] | – Now let’s have sex in it. – Alan. | -咱们去滚一滚吧 -艾伦 |
| [06:08] | Good-bye. | 再见 |
| [06:15] | All right. | 好吧 |
| [06:17] | Universe 82,224. | 老天爷得了82224分 |
| [06:27] | Twenty-five. | 82225分 |
| [06:42] | Alan. | 艾伦 |
| [06:43] | Hi, Judith. | 朱蒂丝 |
| [06:44] | What are you doing here? | 你怎么来了 |
| [06:46] | Oh, God, what did Jake do? | 天哪 是杰克闯祸了吗 |
| [06:48] | Please tell me the Army didn’t let him drive a tank again. | 军队不会又让他开坦克了吧 |
| [06:50] | No, no, nothing’s wrong with Jake. | 不不 杰克没惹麻烦 |
| [06:52] | Well, nothing new wrong. | 没惹新麻烦 |
| [06:54] | Then what’s going on? Is everything okay? | 那你干什么 没事吧 |
| [06:56] | Uh, it’s just that I’ve been having a really rough day, | 我今天过得很不顺 |
| [06:59] | and I needed to see a friendly face. | 需要见见友好的脸庞 |
| [07:01] | And you picked me? | 而你选了我 |
| [07:03] | There’s that friendly face. | 就是这友好的表情 |
| [07:05] | I’m sorry. Why don’t you come on in. | 抱歉 进来坐吧 |
| [07:07] | I just opened a bottle of wine. | 我刚开了一瓶红酒 |
| [07:08] | – Thanks. – Wait. | -谢了 -慢着 |
| [07:10] | You don’t need money, do you? | 你不是来借钱的吧 |
| [07:11] | – No, not at all. – Okay, good. | -不是 -那就好 |
| [07:13] | Wait, are you offering? | 等下 你要给吗 |
| [07:22] | Whoa, nice blanket. | 毛毯真不错 |
| [07:24] | What’s with the cat lady starter kit? | 你这套猫痴老太婆的装备是怎么回事 |
| [07:27] | It’s my bad-news blanket. | 这是我的坏消息毛毯 |
| [07:28] | My mom gave it to me when I was a kid. | 我小时候妈妈给的 |
| [07:30] | I know what you’re saying. | 我懂你的意思 |
| [07:31] | I have a bad-news bong. | 我也有个坏消息大麻烟筒 |
| [07:34] | And a good-news bong. | 好消息也有一个 |
| [07:37] | And a watching-the-news bong. | 还有个听消息间用的烟筒 |
| [07:39] | I guess what I’m saying is, I like to get high. | 我的意思是 我喜欢抽大麻 |
| [07:43] | – This about Brooke? – She blew me off again. | -是因为布鲁克吗 -她又放我鸽子了 |
| [07:46] | She was supposed to come over after work, | 她本来下班后要过来的 |
| [07:47] | but she said she was tired. | 但她说她太累了 |
| [07:50] | Not having sex with me must be exhausting. | 不跟我做爱一定累极了 |
| [07:54] | Look… Jenny, | 珍妮 |
| [07:55] | in any relationship, | 双方交往 |
| [07:57] | it’s normal for there to be | 一段时间以后 |
| [07:59] | a lull in the bedroom after a while. | 有性爱低潮期是很正常的 |
| [08:01] | Does the sex come back? | 那以后还会有吗 |
| [08:03] | You’re cute. | 你真是傻得可爱 |
| [08:06] | But it does help if you do romantic stuff. | 但是做些浪漫的事会有所帮助 |
| [08:09] | – Like what? – Surprise her. Be spontaneous. | -什么样的事 -主动为她制造惊喜 |
| [08:11] | Let her know that you appreciate her. | 让她知道你很爱她 |
| [08:13] | I guess I could send flowers to her work. | 我可以送花到她公司 |
| [08:16] | That’s so gay. | 太基了 |
| [08:19] | Well, these are the kinds of things we have to do | 随着感情发展 我们就得去做 |
| [08:22] | as a relationship evolves. | 这些事情 |
| [08:24] | See, sex becomes companionship, | 性爱变成陪伴 |
| [08:27] | and companionship becomes commitment. | 陪伴变成承诺 |
| [08:31] | Commitment… becomes complacency, which… | 承诺就变成 满足 |
| [08:35] | gives way to contempt. | 最后则化作鄙视 |
| [08:38] | Until you find yourself longing | 直到你开始渴望 |
| [08:40] | for the sweet release of death. | 死亡的甜蜜解脱 |
| [08:43] | Yikes. | 真棒 |
| [08:44] | I’m gonna go get my bad-news bong. | 我要去拿我的坏消息烟筒 |
| [08:50] | Oh, my God, oh, my God. Uh, you remember, uh, | 对了对了 你记得 |
| [08:52] | Jake’s seventh grade science project? | 杰克七年级的科学项目吗 |
| [08:55] | – Wait, which seventh grade? – Second time. | -哪年七年级 -重读那年 |
| [08:57] | Oh, oh, oh, yeah, yeah. | 对对 记得 |
| [08:58] | Um, he wanted to study | 他想研究 |
| [09:00] | how different foods would make his farts smell. | 不同的食物会让他的屁变成什么味道 |
| [09:03] | Oh, yeah! He’d rip one in Tupperware, | 没错 他往保鲜盒里放屁 |
| [09:05] | seal it and label it. | 接着封口贴标签 |
| [09:08] | To this day, I still remember | 直至今日 我还记得 |
| [09:10] | – Brussels sprouts. – Yes. Oh, Brussels sprouts. | -球芽甘蓝的屁味 -对 球芽甘蓝 |
| [09:12] | Most parents make their kids eat vegetables. | 多数家长逼孩子们吃蔬菜 |
| [09:14] | – We made ours stop. – Yeah. Right. | -我们却不让他吃 -是啊 |
| [09:16] | And then he got rickets. | 然后他就得了软骨病 |
| [09:21] | Oh… oh, it’s been a crazy ride, hasn’t it? | 那段日子真是太疯狂了 是吧 |
| [09:24] | Yeah. Mm. | 是啊 |
| [09:27] | Hey… can I ask you something? | 我能问你一件事吗 |
| [09:29] | Oh, here we go. How much? | 终于说出口了 要多少 |
| [09:31] | No, no, not that. | 不是啦 |
| [09:33] | What’s wrong with me? | 我到底有啥问题 |
| [09:35] | Oh, Alan. I don’t carry around a list of your faults. | 艾伦 我可没随身带你的缺点表 |
| [09:38] | My therapist said it’s no longer healthy. | 我的心理治疗师说这样不利身心健康 |
| [09:41] | I’m-I’m serious. I mean, it seems like | 我认真的 我的每段恋情 |
| [09:43] | every relationship I’ve ever been in I’ve screwed up. | 好像都被我搞砸了 |
| [09:47] | Oh. Look, a marriage doesn’t fail | 婚姻失败 |
| [09:48] | because of one person screwing up. | 不是一个人的错 |
| [09:50] | – I screwed up two marriages. – Oh, yeah, | -我还失败了两次呢 -是啊 |
| [09:52] | yeah, you’re right– you’re a two-time loser. | 你说得对 你是二婚废柴 |
| [09:55] | Uh, but at least I have Walden; | 至少我还有沃顿 |
| [09:57] | I mean, you’ve got nobody. | 你却孤身一人 |
| [09:58] | Oh, we’re being honest now? | 现在是要玩说实话了是吗 |
| [10:01] | Herb’s penis is bigger than yours. | 赫伯的鸡鸡比你的大 |
| [10:05] | I’d forgotten how good you are at this. | 我都忘了你的毒舌功力了 |
| [10:09] | I have missed you. | 我真的有想你 |
| [10:11] | I mean, you know, not the constant verbal abuse | 当然我想的肯定不是你那无止尽的毒舌 |
| [10:13] | that left me a crippled shell of a man. | 让我的男性自尊消失殆尽 |
| [10:15] | But we could always make each other laugh. | 但我们总是能让对方开心 |
| [10:18] | You could never find my G-spot, | 你从没找到过我的高潮点 |
| [10:19] | but you could always find my funny bone. | 但你总是能找到我笑点 |
| [10:22] | I’m just kidding. | 我开玩笑啦 |
| [10:24] | I’ve missed you, too. | 我也很想你 |
| [10:32] | Oh, yeah, this is, uh… | 这样有点… |
| [10:34] | This is probably a bad idea. | 我们这样不太好 |
| [10:36] | – Definitely. – Yeah, yeah. | -绝对不好 -是的 |
| [10:49] | Let’s look for that G-spot. | 来找高潮点吧 |
| [10:50] | Or… how about you look for mine? | 或者你来找我的呢 |
| [11:06] | Oh, God. | 天啊 |
| [11:08] | What did we do? | 我们干嘛了 |
| [11:15] | Oh, God, what did I do? | 天啊 我干嘛了 |
| [11:36] | Come on. | 快下来啊 |
| [11:44] | God. | 天啊 |
| [11:45] | What did we do last night? | 我们昨晚都干啥了 |
| [11:54] | More! | 再来 |
| [11:57] | Oh, God. | 我的老天 |
| [12:40] | Well, well, well, someone never made it home last night. | 哟哟哟 昨晚有人彻夜不归哦 |
| [12:45] | Am I speaking with an engaged man? | 现在跟我说话的是订了婚的男人吗 |
| [12:48] | I think you might be. | 你有可能是哦 |
| [12:50] | That’s great. | 很好 |
| [12:51] | Hey, what’d Lyndsey say when you showed her the ring? | 林赛看到戒指的时候怎么说的 |
| [12:54] | That thing is huge. | 那”玩意”真大 |
| [12:55] | That’s what she said. | 别女人看到我那里也那么说 |
| [12:57] | That’s what I said! | 我也说了这笑话啊 |
| [12:59] | She also said she’s staying with Larry. | 她也说了她要跟拉里在一起 |
| [13:01] | What? I thought you said you were engaged. | 什么 你不是说你订婚了吗 |
| [13:03] | I am. To Judith. | 是啊 跟朱蒂丝 |
| [13:07] | What, your ex-wife? | 什么 你前妻吗 |
| [13:09] | What the hell happened? | 怎么会变这样 |
| [13:18] | Well, it’s all kind of sketchy. | 我记忆很模糊了 |
| [13:19] | We had a lot to drink. | 昨晚我跟她喝太多酒 |
| [13:20] | Well, I-I’ve had a lot to drink before, | 我以前也喝太多过 |
| [13:21] | but I’ve never got engaged to my ex-wife. | 但我也从来没跟我前妻订婚过啊 |
| [13:24] | Okay, maybe I’m being selfish, | 我可能很自私 |
| [13:25] | but I’d like to talk about me right now. | 但我现在想谈的是我的问题 |
| [13:28] | Jindsey? Hmm? | 朱赛 |
| [13:30] | Ludith. | 林蒂丝 |
| [13:32] | Will you Larry me? | 你愿意拉里[嫁给]我吗 |
| [13:36] | Let me ask you something. | 我想问你个问题 |
| [13:37] | Um, do you think Judith would be more upset, | 你觉得朱蒂丝是 |
| [13:39] | uh, to wake up and find she’s engaged to me, | 起床发现跟我订婚比较不爽 |
| [13:42] | or to wake up and find she’s missing a finger? | 还是起床发现少了手指比较不爽 |
| [13:45] | Okay, look, I’m sure that she got tipsy | 我相信她也只是一时喝多 |
| [13:48] | and caught up in the moment, too, | 一时之间忘情了而已 |
| [13:49] | and if you’re just honest with her, | 如果你老实跟她谈 |
| [13:51] | she’ll probably be relieved. | 她应该也会松一口气 |
| [13:53] | What if she isn’t? | 如果她不愿意呢 |
| [13:54] | I mean, how do I get her to want out of marrying me? | 那到时候我怎么让她不愿跟我结婚啊 |
| [13:56] | Be yourself? | 就当平常的你就行了 |
| [13:58] | Worked before. | 以前是管用过 |
| [14:06] | Hey, you. | 小帅哥 |
| [14:09] | Um, uh, listen, uh, we should… | 我想跟你谈谈… |
| [14:10] | we should really talk about last night. | 我想跟你谈谈昨晚的事 |
| [14:12] | Absolutely, but I need to say something first. | 当然 但我有些话想说 |
| [14:14] | Things are going to be different this time. | 这一次一切都会不一样 |
| [14:16] | I’m not going to make the same mistakes I made before. | 我不会再犯我以前犯过的错误 |
| [14:19] | And I’m going to start by showing you | 我也会开始每天都向你 |
| [14:20] | how much I appreciate you every single day. | 展露我有多珍惜这段感情 |
| [14:23] | Oh, that’s really sweet, but we really should talk about… | 你这话真甜 但我们真的应该谈谈… |
| [14:27] | Who we should invite to the wedding! | 我们要邀请谁来参加婚礼 |
| [14:36] | Guess what. I’m taking your advice, | 我打算要听你的建议 |
| [14:37] | and I’m surprising Brooke with a romantic evening. | 今晚要去布鲁克家给她个惊喜 |
| [14:41] | Good. You know, I know that’s not easy for you. | 很好 我知道这对你来说不容易 |
| [14:43] | Your dad was the same way. | 你老爸以前也这样 |
| [14:45] | His idea of romance was a warm washcloth, | 他对浪漫的定义就是一块温毛巾 |
| [14:49] | cab fare and a bottle of penicillin. | 出租车费与一瓶青霉素 |
| [14:53] | So my dad wasn’t just a drunken, diseased man-whore. | 所以我老爸不单纯只是个浑身病的醉淫虫 |
| [14:57] | He was a gentleman. | 他还是个绅士 |
| [15:00] | Charlie would be so happy to see his little girl now. | 查理如果见到他女儿这样 他一定很开心 |
| [15:04] | Of course, he’d be even more happy | 当然 他会对自己女儿的 |
| [15:06] | to see the rack on his little girl’s girlfriend. | 女友胸前那对胸器更感到开心 |
| [15:09] | Does she have nice boobs? | 她的胸部很赞吗 |
| [15:10] | I’ve never noticed. | 我从来没注意过 |
| [15:16] | How’d it go with Judith? She take it okay? | 跟朱蒂丝的事怎么样了 她接受得了吗 |
| [15:19] | Uh, well, uh, you know, she… uh, she… | 她 她… |
| [15:21] | It was a… a little hard for her to swallow. | 后来让她”有点难吞下” |
| [15:26] | Well, I’m just glad you talked to her. | 我还是很庆幸你跟她谈了 |
| [15:28] | Can I get my ring back? | 能把我的戒指还我吗 |
| [15:29] | Uh, funny story. | 这事说来好笑 |
| [15:30] | Um… she kind of kept it, | 她貌似收起来了 |
| [15:32] | and we’re kind of getting married. | 我们貌似要结婚了 |
| [15:36] | Alan, I thought you were gonna talk to her. | 你不是说要跟她谈吗 |
| [15:38] | Uh, I did. | 我们谈了啊 |
| [15:39] | Uh, we came to an… oral agreement. | 我们有个口头[口交]上的协议了 |
| [15:44] | Alan! | 艾伦 |
| [15:45] | It’s my weakness. | 那是我的弱点嘛 |
| [15:46] | That and red velvet anything. | 那件事以及红丝绒的任何东西 |
| [15:48] | This is the same woman | 她就是你曾形容过 |
| [15:50] | that you said was so evil | 无恶不作 恶贯满盈 |
| [15:52] | that her image didn’t show up in your wedding pictures. | 邪恶到结婚照里都显示不出的女人啊 |
| [15:56] | I only said that because, at the time, | 我会说那些话是因为 当时嘛 |
| [15:58] | I thought she was the worst person I’d ever met, | 我觉得她是我这辈子碰过最差劲的人 |
| [16:00] | and she made my life a living hell. | 而且日日夜夜折磨我 |
| [16:02] | But, you know, people change. | 但人是会变的嘛 |
| [16:03] | It’s gonna be great. | 一切都会很顺利的 |
| [16:07] | So, Zippy’s moving out, and he’s going to be miserable. | 废柴要搬走了 而且下场凄惨 |
| [16:11] | So you have been listening. | 神原来你有在听我的祈祷啊 |
| [16:17] | Oh, I have to say, | 我得说 |
| [16:18] | dinner was great, Judith. | 晚餐太美味了 朱蒂丝 |
| [16:19] | Thank you for inviting me over. | 多谢你请我过来 |
| [16:20] | Of course. You’re Alan’s best friend. | 客气什么 你是艾伦最好的朋友 |
| [16:22] | Actually, you’re Alan’s only friend. | 事实上 你是艾伦唯一的朋友 |
| [16:26] | It’s funny ’cause it’s true. | 真好笑 因为这是事实 |
| [16:29] | Oh, honey, uh, could you pass the potatoes, please? | 亲爱的 麻烦把土豆递我一下 |
| [16:31] | Oh, I think you’ve already had plenty, doughboy. | 我想你已经吃的够多了 小肚腩 |
| [16:38] | Well, I have to say, I was shocked | 我得说当艾伦说 |
| [16:40] | when Alan told me you were getting married again. | 你们要复婚时 我大吃一惊 |
| [16:42] | Oh, you were shocked? | 何止你大吃一惊啊 |
| [16:44] | There was a time when just the thought | 曾几何时 只要想到 |
| [16:45] | of being touched by his tiny, clammy hands again | 他那小小粘粘的手指再碰我 |
| [16:48] | made me throw up in my mouth a little. | 就令我想吐 |
| [16:51] | That’s all ancient history. | 那是陈年旧事了 |
| [16:52] | Yeah, if ancient history was last Thursday. | 对 如果上周四算是陈年旧事的话 |
| [16:59] | – Oh, isn’t she great? – No! | -她是不是好棒 -不是 |
| [17:04] | She’s treating you like crap. | 她根本不把你当人 |
| [17:06] | The only people that get to do that | 唯一能这样做的人 |
| [17:07] | are people that do it out of love, | 是爱你并出于一番好意的人 |
| [17:08] | like me and Berta and your mom. | 比如说我 波塔 还有你妈 |
| [17:11] | Okay, fine. Me and Berta. | 好吧 我和波塔 |
| [17:13] | Okay. Me. | 好吧 我 |
| [17:15] | It’s harmless. | 没关系的 |
| [17:16] | It’s just Judith being funny. | 朱蒂丝只是说些笑话 |
| [17:19] | Did… did you just twitch? | 你刚刚抽筋了吗 |
| [17:21] | No, I was just talking about how funny Judith is. | 没 我只是说朱蒂丝有多搞笑 |
| [17:25] | Okay, look me in the eye | 看着我的眼睛 |
| [17:26] | and tell me how much you love Judith without twitching. | 告诉我你有多爱朱蒂丝 不准抽筋 |
| [17:29] | Fine. I love Judith. | 好吧 我爱朱蒂丝 |
| [17:32] | There, I said it. | 瞧 我说了 |
| [17:34] | Alan. | 艾伦 |
| [17:36] | You cannot marry this woman. | 你不能娶这个女人 |
| [17:37] | You deserve better. | 你值得拥有更好的女人 |
| [17:39] | I mean, not much better, but better. | 不是说好太多 总之更好 |
| [17:41] | You know who I deserve? | 你知道我值得拥有谁吗 |
| [17:42] | I deserve Lyndsey, but I can’t have her. | 我值得拥有林赛 但我无法拥有她 |
| [17:44] | She’s marrying somebody else, | 她要嫁给别人了 |
| [17:45] | so I’m taking what I can get. | 所以我只能要我能要到的 |
| [17:46] | That’s what I do. I’m a love scavenger. | 我就是这样的人 我是爱情收破烂儿的 |
| [17:48] | You’re also a house scavenger and a money scavenger | 你还是房子收破烂儿的 钞票收破烂儿的 |
| [17:51] | and an underwear scavenger. | 内裤收破烂儿的 |
| [17:53] | But that doesn’t mean you have to settle. | 但这并不代表你要委身相许 |
| [17:55] | Yes, it does. I don’t want to die alone. | 代表了 我不想孤独终老 |
| [17:57] | Maybe you don’t realize it, but there aren’t a lot of people | 也许你没有意识到 但愿意 |
| [17:59] | who want to spend the rest of their lives with me. | 和我过一辈子的人并不多 |
| [18:01] | Oh, no, I realize it! | 不 我绝对有意识到 |
| [18:07] | Brooke, really, we can get a hotel for the night. | 布鲁克 我们晚上可以住酒店 |
| [18:09] | No, no, no, Dad. It’s fine. | 没事 爸 没关系 |
| [18:10] | I’ll sleep on the couch, and you guys stay in my room. | 我睡沙发 你们睡我的房间 |
| [18:13] | Surprise! | 惊喜 |
| [18:16] | Who’s this? | 这是哪位 |
| [18:18] | Uh, Mom, Dad, this is, um… | 妈 爸 这位是 |
| [18:21] | my girlfriend, Jenny. | 我的女友 珍妮 |
| [18:23] | It’s a pleasure to meet you! | 很高兴认识你们 |
| [18:26] | I like her. | 我喜欢她 |
| [18:32] | Oh, hey, I was thinking, now that Jake’s gone… | 我在想 现在杰克离开家了 |
| [18:34] | …I can turn his room into my man-cave. | 我可以把他的房间变成我的男人基地 |
| [18:37] | You know, a pinball machine, flat-screen TV, potter’s wheel. | 弄个弹球机 平板电视 制陶旋盘 |
| [18:40] | No, that’s not going to happen. | 不 这不可能 |
| [18:42] | Oh, you have plans for it? | 你有计划吗 |
| [18:43] | No, I’m just not letting you get another potter’s wheel. | 没 我只是不能让你再弄一个制陶旋盘 |
| [18:49] | Judith, I have to say, | 朱蒂丝 我得说 |
| [18:50] | I cannot take my eyes off of that ring. | 我的眼光无法从那枚戒指上移开 |
| [18:52] | I know. When I first saw it, | 是啊 我第一次看到时 |
| [18:54] | I thought it was as fake as the orgasms | 我以为这和我们还是夫妻时 |
| [18:55] | I used to have when we were married. | 我的那些假高潮一样假 |
| [18:58] | That’s true. | 没错 |
| [18:59] | Very unsatisfactory lover. | 我是非常不能让人满足的爱人 |
| [19:03] | But I mean, | 我意思是 |
| [19:03] | what woman could say no to this? | 什么样的女人会拒绝这个呀 |
| [19:05] | I can think of one. | 我可以想到一个 |
| [19:08] | Can you think of one, Alan? | 你能想到一个吗 艾伦 |
| [19:12] | Uh, what’s going on? | 什么事 |
| [19:13] | Oh, nothing. I’m just glad | 没什么 我只是很开心 |
| [19:15] | that you were there to pick up the pieces | 在林赛拒绝艾伦的求婚后 |
| [19:17] | after Lyndsey turned down Alan’s proposal. | 有你收拾残局 |
| [19:19] | What?! You proposed to her before me? | 什么 你先向她求婚的吗 |
| [19:21] | Uh, well, technically, uh, what I… | 确切来说 我… |
| [19:23] | Oh, you didn’t know? | 你不知道吗 |
| [19:26] | This is awkward. | 这下尴尬了 |
| [19:29] | Open mouth, remove pie, insert foot. | 真是祸从口出啊 |
| [19:33] | So, I’m your second choice?! | 我是你的第二选择吗 |
| [19:35] | No, d-doesn’t matter who was second. | 谁是第二有什么关系啊 |
| [19:37] | Uh, y-you were the first to say yes! | 你是第一个说”愿意”的 |
| [19:40] | I will be the first to say yes | 我将是第一个对这种派的 |
| [19:41] | to seconds of this pie. | 次品说”愿意”的人 |
| [19:44] | You are unbelievable! | 你真是难以置信 |
| [19:45] | No, the important thing is | 不 重要的是 |
| [19:46] | that we found each other again. | 我们又找到了彼此 |
| [19:48] | And you’re willing to settle for me, | 你愿意委身于我 |
| [19:49] | and I’m willing to settle for you. | 我也愿意委身于你 |
| [19:51] | Settle for this. | 委身于这个吧 |
| [19:52] | Oh! God! | 老天 |
| [19:57] | I’m a good friend. | 我真是一个好朋友 |
| [20:08] | Hey. How’s it going? | 怎么样了 |
| [20:10] | Good. Thanks again for the potter’s wheel. | 很好 再次感谢这个制陶旋盘 |
| [20:13] | It’s the least I could do. | 这是我最起码能做的 |
| [20:14] | I cost you a wife. | 我让你没了老婆 |
| [20:16] | I’m just glad you, uh, | 我只是很开心 |
| [20:17] | came to your senses. | 你恢复了理智 |
| [20:18] | Yeah, I was just scared. | 我只是害怕了 |
| [20:19] | Didn’t want to spend the rest of my life alone. | 不想下半辈子孤单一个人 |
| [20:21] | Hey, as long as I’m around, you’ll never be alone. | 只要有我在 你就不会孤单 |
| [20:25] | Ah, thanks, buddy. | 谢谢 兄弟 |
| [20:27] | Oh, shoot. | 见鬼 |
| [20:28] | Oh, here. Let me help you out with that. | 来 我来帮你 |
| [20:53] | Thank God, it was just a dream. | 谢天谢地 只是做梦 |
| [20:57] | Are you okay, baby? Did you have a nightmare? | 你还好吗 宝贝 做恶梦了吗 |
| [21:05] | I got to get him out of here. | 我得把他弄走 |