| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | Hi. | 你好 |
| [00:03] | This is Jeff; Jeff Strongman. | 这位是杰夫·斯壮曼 |
| [00:07] | So what happened between you and your girl? | 你和你女朋友怎么了 |
| [00:08] | She wanted to get married and I’m just not sure I’m ready. | 她想结婚 而我却不确定我是否准备好了 |
| [00:11] | It’s the same reason I lost Lyndsey. | 我跟林赛分手也是因为这个 |
| [00:13] | It’s like we were dating the same woman. | 感觉就像我们在跟同一个女人约会 |
| [00:14] | I am gonna ask Lyndsey to marry me. | 我要向林赛求婚 |
| [00:18] | Lyndsey MacElroy… | 林赛·麦克罗伊 |
| [00:19] | will you marry me? | 你愿意嫁给我吗 |
| [00:21] | Yes! I will marry you! | 愿意 我愿意嫁给你 |
| [00:23] | Everything you need to know is right in here. | 你需要知道的一切都在里面 |
| [00:25] | Somebody gave me a billion dollar idea– | 有人给我一个价值亿万的点子 |
| [00:28] | thought controlled computing. | 意识控制处理 |
| [00:30] | We have so much work to do | 我们有这么多事要做 |
| [00:31] | and all I can think about is you and me– wow… | 我却只想到你和我 还有… 老天 |
| [00:33] | Gotta stop thinking about sex. | 不能再想着做爱了 |
| [00:35] | This is Walden Schmidt saying– | 沃顿·施密特说 |
| [00:37] | Pudding. | 布丁 |
| [00:38] | I think the computer just read his thoughts! | 我想电脑刚刚读出了他的想法 |
| [00:40] | It worked. | 成功了 |
| [00:42] | Yes! | 太棒了 |
| [00:42] | Someone’s not wearing a bra. | 某人没戴胸罩哦 |
| [00:47] | This is great! | 这样太棒了 |
| [00:48] | My best friend, my fiance | 我最好的朋友 我的未婚妻 |
| [00:49] | and a great bottle of French wine. | 还有一瓶法国好酒 |
| [00:51] | Uh, uh, technically it’s French Canadian. | 其实是法裔加拿大酒 |
| [00:53] | Uh, it’s called “Two-buck Canuck,” | 叫”双鹿法加”[两块也顶用] |
| [00:56] | and, uh, it’s not wine, it’s wine-ish. | 也不是酒是酒精饮品 |
| [00:58] | Um, but it still gets the panties on the floor, | 但要拐掉妹子的小裤裤还是没问题的 |
| [01:00] | if you know what I’m talking about. | 我的意思你懂的 |
| [01:03] | Maybe you should have another glass, Lyndsey. | 林赛 也许你也该再来一杯 |
| [01:04] | I’m good. | 我够了 |
| [01:06] | Hey, uh, how about you, Larry? | 那你呢 拉里 |
| [01:07] | No, I’m not wearing panties. | 人家没有穿小裤裤 |
| [01:10] | All righty, so, uh, guess we’re done with this. | 好吧 那看来这瓶酒不需要了 |
| [01:13] | So… | 所以 |
| [01:15] | how long of an engagement are you guys planning? | 你们打算维持订婚多久呢 |
| [01:17] | Uh, two years? Five years? | 两年吗 还是五年呢 |
| [01:18] | I mean, you know, there’s no rush to start a family. | 反正你们也不急着要组成家庭 |
| [01:21] | I mean, after all, uh, | 毕竟你想想 |
| [01:22] | Lyndsey’s well beyond her child-bearing age. | 林赛早已过了能生小孩的岁数了 |
| [01:26] | Well, we have talked about adopting a baby from China. | 我们有聊过要从中国领养个孩子 |
| [01:29] | Course, then we’d have to teach it English, | 但我们就得教他说英语 |
| [01:30] | which seems like a lot of work. | 感觉应该挺累人的 |
| [01:33] | Would you mind getting desert, sweetie? | 宝贝 能去拿个甜点吗 |
| [01:35] | – Sure. – Sure. | -行 -行 |
| [01:38] | Um, kidding. | 开个玩笑啦 |
| [01:40] | Uh, this one’s on you, sweetie. | 是你该去拿哦 宝贝 |
| [01:42] | All right, but no funny business while I’m gone. | 行 但我不在的时候你们不许胡来 |
| [01:44] | I’ll know, Jeff. | 我会发现的哦 杰夫 |
| [01:45] | You haven’t so far. | 你目前都还没发现啊 |
| [01:47] | I’ve been banging this one for months. | 我上了这妞好几个月咯 |
| [01:52] | I love this guy! | 我爱死这家伙了 |
| [01:53] | She does too! | 她也爱死了 |
| [01:57] | Isn’t this fun? | 这是不是很好玩啊 |
| [01:58] | Yeah. It’s great. | 是啊 真好玩 |
| [02:00] | Why the hell are you here? | 你他妈来吃饭干嘛 |
| [02:03] | Larry asked me to dinner. | 拉里邀请我来吃饭啊 |
| [02:04] | What was I supposed to say? | 不然我怎么回答他 |
| [02:05] | That you couldn’t come. That you had to work. | 你来不了 你得工作 |
| [02:06] | That you’re not really Jeff Strongman | 其实你不是杰夫·斯壮曼 |
| [02:08] | and your entire friendship is a lie. | 你们整段友谊都是谎言 |
| [02:10] | That I had to work– that’s a good one. | 你说”因为我得工作” 这理由够好笑 |
| [02:14] | Alan, this wedding is very important to me. | 艾伦 这婚礼对我很重要 |
| [02:17] | If you still have any feelings for me at all, | 如果你心中对我还有任何情谊 |
| [02:19] | you will let me have this day. | 你就会让我好好地拥有那一天 |
| [02:21] | Fine. | 好吧 |
| [02:23] | I shan’t go. | 我不应该去 |
| [02:26] | But good luck getting the Chicken Dance started without me. | 但没有我来领跳小鸡舞 你们会后悔的 |
| [02:31] | Hey, Jeff, you want a piece of Lyndsey’s pie? | 你要来一点林赛的派[私处]吗 |
| [02:33] | There’s no way I can eat it all myself. | 我自己一个人是吃不完的 |
| [02:35] | I don’t know. | 我也不知道 |
| [02:36] | Last time I had some, there was a hair in it. | 上次我吃的时候 里面还有根毛发呢 |
| [02:40] | Jeff was actually just saying that he’s got to get going. | 杰夫其实刚才在说他得走了 |
| [02:43] | Really? Oh. | 真的吗 |
| [02:44] | Well, then I’ll make this quick. | 那我得赶紧把话跟你说了 |
| [02:46] | I know we haven’t known each other for a long time, | 我知道我们才认识没有很久 |
| [02:48] | but I feel like we share a lot. | 但我觉得我们分享了各种事物 |
| [02:50] | M-More than you know. | 比你知道的还多哦 |
| [02:52] | So I was wondering if you’d do me the honor | 所以我在想你是否愿意赏脸 |
| [02:53] | of being my best man? | 来当我的伴郎 |
| [02:55] | – What?! – What?! | -什么 -什么 |
| [02:57] | What do you say? | 你意下如何 |
| [02:58] | I… say… | 我觉得… |
| [03:00] | …you’ve made me the happiest person in the world– | 你让我成为世上最开心的人啦 |
| [03:02] | Yes! | 我愿意 |
| [03:05] | You sure? Don’t you want to take a moment to think about it? | 你确定吗 你不需要花一点时间考虑吗 |
| [03:08] | What is there to think about? | 有什么好考虑的 |
| [03:09] | You know, you could change my name from | 你可以把我的名字从 |
| [03:10] | “Jeff Strongman”, to “Jeff Best Man.” | “杰夫·斯壮曼[壮男]”改到”杰夫·伴郎曼” |
| [03:13] | That’s the kind of stuff I want in your toast! | 你说祝酒词的时候 我就想听到这些 |
| [03:15] | And this is the kind of stuff | 这也是 |
| [03:16] | you’re gonna get on the dance floor: | 你在舞池上会见到的 |
| [03:40] | Oh. Wait. | 等等 |
| [03:45] | Hey, good lookin’. | 你好啊 靓女 |
| [03:46] | Whatcha got cookin’? | 你做了啥吃的啊 |
| [03:49] | Pot brownies. | 大麻巧克力蛋糕 |
| [03:50] | What the hell is that? | 那是什么玩意 |
| [03:52] | It’s a new project I’m working on. | 我最近在做的项目 |
| [03:54] | It enables a computer to read my mind | 它能让电脑读到我的心思 |
| [03:57] | and then talk to you. | 然后跟你说话 |
| [03:59] | Why can’t you just talk to me? | 你为啥不直接跟我说话就好了 |
| [04:02] | Because, I… | 因为… 我… |
| [04:05] | and this… shut up. | 这个… 你闭嘴啦 |
| [04:09] | Come on, try it. I think it’s big enough. | 来 你也试试 应该是够大 |
| [04:11] | I think it’ll fit. | 你也塞得进 |
| [04:11] | The last time someone said that, | 我上次听到这两句话时 |
| [04:13] | I ended up pregnant with my first daughter. | 我的下场就是怀了我的大女儿 |
| [04:18] | Hey… I got good news. | 我有好消息哦 |
| [04:20] | I’m paid to pick up your crap, not listen to it. | 薪水是付我打扫你的狗屁倒灶 不是听你说 |
| [04:24] | Guess who Larry asked to be his best man? | 猜猜拉里请谁当他的伴郎了 |
| [04:28] | One of his friends who’s actually real? | 他的某个真实朋友吗 |
| [04:30] | Jeff Strongman is like butter on movie theater popcorn. | 杰夫·斯壮曼就像是电影院爆米花上的黄油 |
| [04:33] | He may not be real, but he’s delicious nonetheless. | 不见得是真实存在 但还是好吃到爆 |
| [04:36] | So, let me get this straight: | 我来理清一下 |
| [04:38] | your alter ego, Mm-hmm. | 你的第二人格 |
| [04:40] | is going to be the best man | 将要在第一人格的爱人 |
| [04:42] | at the wedding of your lover… | 嫁给别的男人时的婚礼上 |
| [04:44] | and another guy? | 当那男人的伴郎吗 |
| [04:46] | When you put it like that, it sounds like | 被你这么一说 这简直是 |
| [04:47] | a soap opera on Telemundo. | 西语电视台的肥皂剧啊 |
| [04:50] | Senor Strongman, why do you make love to | 斯壮曼先生[西语] 为什么你要跟 |
| [04:51] | the woman of the man you love? | 你爱的男人的女人做爱呢 |
| [04:55] | – Lyndsey? – Are you insane? | -林赛 -你疯啦 |
| [04:56] | Oh, si, Senor Strongman es muy loco. | 没错 斯壮曼先生就是疯子[西语] |
| [05:01] | How could you say “yes”, to being Larry’s best man? | 你怎么能够答应当拉里的伴郎 |
| [05:04] | I don’t know. I got excited. | 我不知道 我当时太兴奋了 |
| [05:05] | And you and I both know when I get excited, I tend to… | 我们都知道我”兴奋”的时候容易… |
| [05:07] | react prematurely. | 过”早泄”露决定 |
| [05:10] | Why would you even want to go? | 你怎么会想去参加呢 |
| [05:11] | Are you kidding me?! | 你在开玩笑吗 |
| [05:13] | I mean, just ’cause you’re mad at me right now | 我是说 虽然你对我很生气 |
| [05:14] | doesn’t mean I’m going to miss the wedding of someone I love. | 但并不意味着我要错过我爱的人的婚礼 |
| [05:17] | Aw… that’s very sweet. | 你嘴真甜 |
| [05:19] | I was talking about Larry. | 我是说爱拉里 |
| [05:21] | Ah! Dios mio! | 我的上帝啊[西语] |
| [05:25] | Alan, I don’t care how you do it, | 艾伦 我不管你用什么办法 |
| [05:28] | fake Jeff Strongman’s death– | 制造杰夫·斯壮曼死掉的假象 |
| [05:29] | actually die. | 或者真去死吧 |
| [05:31] | You will not be at my wedding. | 你不许出现在我的婚礼上 |
| [05:39] | She will be back here in three seconds | 三秒钟后她会回来 |
| [05:41] | looking for make-up sex. | 跟我上床和好 |
| [05:45] | One… | 一 |
| [05:47] | Two… | 二 |
| [05:52] | Three. | 三 |
| [05:55] | Three. | 三 |
| [05:59] | You’re an idiot. | 你个傻逼 |
| [06:03] | I’m, um, I’m sorry. | 抱歉 |
| [06:04] | That was wrong. | 出故障了 |
| [06:06] | Tu eres una idiota. | 你个傻逼[西语] |
| [06:12] | All right, Bill Gates… | 比尔·盖茨[微软创始人] |
| [06:14] | Steve Wozniak… | 史蒂夫·沃兹尼亚克[苹果创始人之一] |
| [06:16] | and Mark Zuckerberg. | 还有马克·扎克伯格[脸书创始人] |
| [06:17] | – Ooh, that’s a tough one. – Yeah. | -这问题有难度啊 -对 |
| [06:19] | I’d definitely kill Mark Zuckerberg… | 我肯定会杀了马克·扎克伯格 |
| [06:22] | …bang Bill Gates, marry Steve Wozniak. | 上了比尔·盖茨 和史蒂夫·沃兹尼亚克结婚 |
| [06:25] | What?! That’s crazy. | 什么 这太离谱了 |
| [06:27] | I mean, yes, you have to kill Zuckerberg. | 没错 你是该杀掉扎克伯格 |
| [06:30] | But you gotta marry Bill. | 但是应该跟比尔结婚 |
| [06:31] | I mean, I’ve seen it before, | 我以前见过的 |
| [06:32] | he is gonna take those glasses off | 他会把眼镜摘下来 |
| [06:34] | and shake is hair loose and you’re gonna be like, | 甩开头发 你就会惊讶说 |
| [06:36] | “Where did this guy come from?” | “这个家伙是天神下凡吗?” |
| [06:39] | I hear you, but I’m still marrying Woz. | 我明白你意思了 但我还是要跟沃兹结婚 |
| [06:41] | I’m a boob man. | 我喜欢胸大的人[他是胖子] |
| [06:43] | Are you guys playing “Bang, Marry, Kill” Again? | 你们俩又在玩”上谁娶谁杀谁”吗 |
| [06:45] | ‘Cause if you are, I’ve got one for you: | 如果是的话 我也给你出个题 |
| [06:48] | Angelina Jolie, Mila Kunis and me. | 安吉丽娜·朱莉 米娜·古妮丝 还有我 |
| [06:48] | 安吉丽娜·朱莉 米娜·古妮丝两者都是知名好莱坞女星 外形都十分艳丽 | |
| [06:52] | I would kill you | 我会在我们的 |
| [06:53] | by banging you to death on our honeymoon. | “结婚”蜜月时把你”上”到”死” |
| [06:57] | And then after the funeral, Angelina Jolie. | 葬礼之后 再上安吉丽娜·朱莉 |
| [07:01] | I would love to bang Mila Kunis. | 我十分乐意上米娜·古妮丝 |
| [07:06] | Not gonna happen, Barry. | 下辈子吧 巴里 |
| [07:08] | All right. I’m out of here. | 好吧 我走了 |
| [07:10] | I thought we were gonna grab some dinner. | 我们不是约了要一起吃饭吗 |
| [07:11] | I can’t. I got a thing. | 不行 我要去弄点东西 |
| [07:14] | You got a thing. I got a thing. | 你有”东西” 我也有”东西” |
| [07:15] | We put our things together, we have some fun. | 把我们的”东西”放到一起 就有乐子了 |
| [07:18] | Hey, every time I say stuff like that, | 每次我说这种话 |
| [07:19] | I get pepper sprayed. | 都会被喷胡椒水 |
| [07:21] | That was one time, Barry | 就一次 巴里 |
| [07:22] | and my mom still feels bad about it. | 而且我妈一直感到很内疚 |
| [07:26] | I’ll make it up to you tomorrow, I promise. | 明天我会弥补给你 我保证 |
| [07:30] | What’s your mom up to these days? | 你妈最近忙什么呢 |
| [07:31] | Shut up, Barry. | 闭上你的嘴 巴里 |
| [07:33] | Better hope I don’t run into Mila Kunis. | 最好希望我不要遇见米娜·古妮丝 |
| [07:35] | Yeah, like that’s gonna happen. | 说得跟真的一样 |
| [07:42] | Hey! There’s my best man! | 我的伴郎来啦 |
| [07:44] | Groom goes the dynamite. | 霸气新郎屌炸天 |
| [07:47] | Come on in. | 快请进 |
| [07:48] | I’ve got some beer on ice and sports on ice. | 家里有冰镇啤酒还有冰上运动 |
| [07:51] | Oh, yeah! You’re right! | 没错 |
| [07:52] | Uh, tonight’s the finals of the pairs ice dancing. | 今晚是双人冰上舞蹈的总决赛 |
| [07:56] | You’re hilarious. | 你太搞笑了 |
| [07:57] | Hey, you got to do this gay character | 伴郎祝词的时候记得再装这基佬 |
| [07:59] | in your best man toast. | 还挺有”笑”果的 |
| [08:01] | Uh, about that, you know I’m-I’m-I’m not sure | 那个嘛 我不太确定 |
| [08:03] | that I’m the right person to be your best man. | 我是当你伴郎的最佳人选 |
| [08:05] | I’ll probably just end up drinking too much | 我可能会喝过了头 |
| [08:08] | and getting yelled at by the bride | 弄得新娘对我大喊大叫 |
| [08:10] | and singing a tearful, yet moving version of | 并且热泪盈眶唱一曲感天动地的 |
| [08:12] | “All by Myself.” | 《形单影只》 |
| [08:14] | At least, that’s what happened at my wedding. | 至少我的婚礼上是这样 |
| [08:17] | Well, you’re not getting cold feet, are you, buddy? | 你不会想临阵脱逃了吧 兄弟 |
| [08:18] | Well, no, it’s just that it’s your special day. | 不 只是这是你最重要的日子 |
| [08:20] | I mean, y-you sure that there isn’t somebody more deserving | 你确定没有人比我更适合 |
| [08:22] | to be your best man? | 当你的伴郎吗 |
| [08:24] | A-a-a brother? A college roommate? | 一个兄弟 或者大学室友 |
| [08:26] | Someone who knows your last name? | 知道你姓什么的人 |
| [08:28] | God, you’re a riot. | 天哪 你太搞笑了 |
| [08:30] | There’s nobody I’d rather stand with | 我最希望和我一起站在 |
| [08:31] | at that altar than you, Jeff. | 圣坛旁的人就是你 杰夫 |
| [08:33] | Why do you have to be so darn sweet? | 你为什么对我这么好 |
| [08:35] | Plus, I’m counting on you to help me out | 我还要靠你帮我搞定 |
| [08:36] | with the most important part of this wedding– | 婚礼上最重要的部分 |
| [08:38] | – bachelor party. – Outfits. | -单身汉派对 -服装搭配 |
| [08:42] | I was thinking black tie. | 我在想黑色领带[黑人 泰锅妞] |
| [08:43] | Sure, black girls, Thai girls, whatever you want. | 当然 黑人女孩 泰国女孩 随你挑 |
| [08:48] | Larry, where can I put this poop? | 拉里 这个便便我放哪 |
| [08:50] | Ooh! And who do we have here? | 这位是谁啊 |
| [08:53] | This is my sister Gretchen. She just moved here. | 这是我妹妹格雷琴 她刚搬过来 |
| [08:55] | Gretchen, this is Jeff Strongman. | 格雷琴 这是杰夫·斯壮曼 |
| [08:57] | Oh, yeah! | 原来是你啊 |
| [08:58] | Hey, from what I hear, | 就我所知 |
| [08:58] | I should call you “Jeff Best Man.” | 我应该叫你”杰夫·伴郎曼” |
| [09:01] | Oh, my God, that’s what I said. | 天哪 那是我的原话啊 |
| [09:04] | Um, so, where’s your dog? | 你的狗狗在哪里 |
| [09:05] | In the garage trying to wipe his ass. | 在车库自己擦屁股 |
| [09:08] | Now, I couldn’t find the trash. | 我找不到垃圾桶 |
| [09:10] | It’s out back. I got it. | 在后面 给我吧 |
| [09:12] | You can tell I love her, | 看得出来我很爱她 |
| [09:13] | ’cause I take a lot of crap from her. | 因为我受了她很多便便[屁事] |
| [09:14] | Get it? Crap. | 知道吗 便便 |
| [09:18] | And he’s Mom’s favorite. | 我妈最爱的是这货 |
| [09:19] | I hear you. Luckily, my brother’s dead. | 我也是过来人 还好我哥哥死了 |
| [09:22] | Oh. So… | 那… |
| [09:24] | uh… uh, you just moved here? | 你刚搬过来吗 |
| [09:26] | Yeah. My brother’s letting me crash here. | 是啊 我哥哥让我住进来的 |
| [09:28] | I told him it was just for a couple days, | 我告诉他只借宿几天就好 |
| [09:30] | but, between you and me, it’s a pretty sweet deal. | 但是悄悄告诉你 我可占便宜了 |
| [09:32] | Huh. I should try that. | 我也应该试试 |
| [09:35] | Part of me thinks | 我有时在想 |
| [09:36] | I should just stay here till he dies. | 我应该一直住到他死 |
| [09:38] | Why stop there? | 何止啊 |
| [09:39] | Why not move in with the next guy who buys the house? | 下一个买房的人住进来也得继续留着白住 |
| [09:42] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [09:42] | So, uh, what do you do? | 你是做什么的 |
| [09:44] | I’m a vet. I moved out here | 我是个兽医 我搬过来 |
| [09:45] | to run an animal shelter. | 管理一家动物收容所 |
| [09:46] | Oh… so that tasteful sports bra | 所以品味高雅的运动内衣下 |
| [09:48] | covers a tender heart? | 罩着一颗柔软的心啊 |
| [09:50] | Well, the puppies at the shelter | 收容所的小狗狗们 |
| [09:52] | aren’t the only ones that need support. | 可不是唯一需要”支持”的 |
| [09:55] | Well, I’d uh, I’d love to meet your furry little friend. | 我很想见见你那毛茸茸的”小朋友” |
| [09:58] | I mean, I’m talking about the dog. | 我是说小狗狗 |
| [10:00] | Not that I don’t want to meet– | 不是我不想看… |
| [10:02] | Never mind, uh… | 算了 |
| [10:04] | So, you run a shelter? | 所以你是开收容所的 |
| [10:05] | Yeah. I’ve always had a soft spot for strays | 是的 我对没人要的流浪生物 |
| [10:07] | that no one else wanted to take in. | 总有种特别的偏爱 |
| [10:14] | Ho, ho, ho– somebody is gettin’ laid tonight. | 某人今晚要滚床单了 |
| [10:17] | Thank you. | 谢了 |
| [10:18] | No, not you. | 不 没说你 |
| [10:19] | I just found a late night booty call on Craigslist. | 我刚在分类广告网收到深夜约炮消息 |
| [10:22] | Hello, BoobaFett420. | 你好啊 波霸·费特420 |
| [10:25] | You know, Barry, | 巴里 |
| [10:26] | sometimes the picture isn’t who you get. | 有时头像非本人 |
| [10:29] | Oh, tell me about it. | 可不是 |
| [10:30] | I used your picture. | 我用的就是你的照片 |
| [10:32] | Where’s Nicole? | 妮可在哪 |
| [10:33] | Nicole. | 妮可 |
| [10:35] | Yikes. | 糟糕 |
| [10:36] | – This is gonna be tough. – What happened? | -你可能无法接受 -出什么事了 |
| [10:38] | – She’s dead. – What? | -她死了 -什么 |
| [10:40] | No, she just blew you off again. | 没啦 她只是又放你鸽子了 |
| [10:41] | I was just trying to soften the blow. | 我就想让你少受点打击 |
| [10:45] | The second time she canceled. | 这是她第二次放我鸽子了 |
| [10:47] | Something’s going on. | 肯定有什么事 |
| [10:48] | Look, I’m sure there is | 她肯定有 |
| [10:50] | a perfectly reasonable explanation. | 非常合理的解释 |
| [10:52] | She say anything? | 她说什么了吗 |
| [10:53] | Just that she would call you later. | 就说晚点会打给你 |
| [10:54] | But on the plus side, I’m available now. | 但从好的方面说 我现在有空 |
| [10:57] | Dave and Buster’s, party of two. | 去戴夫和伯斯特餐馆搓一顿吧 就咱俩 |
| [10:59] | We’re not going to Dave and Buster’s. | 我们不去戴夫和伯斯特餐馆 |
| [11:00] | We’re gonna track down my girlfriend. | 我们要去跟踪我的女朋友 |
| [11:02] | Now shut up and get in the car. | 闭嘴上车 |
| [11:04] | Oh, my God, you sound just like my dad. | 天哪 你说这话跟我爸似的 |
| [11:11] | This is impressive. | 真厉害 |
| [11:12] | How’d you track her down at the restaurant? | 你怎么知道她在这家餐厅 |
| [11:14] | GPS? Triangulate the cell phone signal? | 全球定位系统 三角定位她的手机信号 |
| [11:18] | No, she asked me to make the reservations for her. | 都不是 她让我帮她在这家餐厅订座 |
| [11:24] | Look at her in there. | 快看她啊 |
| [11:25] | Happy as can be. | 这么开心 |
| [11:28] | I’ll have an order of seared Walden’s Heart. | 我要一份烤沃顿心 |
| [11:31] | Hold the trust and honesty. | 信任和坦诚就不要了 |
| [11:35] | Okay, okay, let me try one. | 我也要演 |
| [11:37] | You know, honey, I’m worried about Bobby. | 亲爱的 我很担心波比 |
| [11:39] | His grades have really been slipping. | 他的成绩严重下滑 |
| [11:43] | Who are you doing? | 你演的是谁 |
| [11:44] | That serious-looking couple in the corner. | 角落里那对严肃的夫妇 |
| [11:47] | Well, I’m worried about the fact | 我还担心 |
| [11:48] | that you always have to drive the baby-sitter home. | 你干嘛老是送保姆回家呢 |
| [11:53] | I’m just doing Nicole. | 我扮[上]的是妮可 |
| [11:54] | Well, somebody’s doing Nicole, but it’s clearly not you. | 是有人要上妮可 但显然不是你 |
| [11:59] | Why does this always happen to me? | 为什么我总是遇到这种事 |
| [12:01] | Boy meets girl, boy falls in love with girl, | 男孩遇到女孩 男孩爱上女孩 |
| [12:04] | girl breaks boy’s heart, | 女孩伤透了男孩的心 |
| [12:06] | boy ends up in car with socially awkward friend. | 男孩跟死宅朋友坐在车里 |
| [12:11] | Come on, man. You know chicks. | 拜托 兄弟 妞就这样 |
| [12:12] | She’s probably just playing hard to get. | 她可能只是在欲擒故纵 |
| [12:14] | “You can’t just show up at my house like this, Barry.” | “你不能就这样跑来我家 巴里” |
| [12:16] | “Where’d you get those pictures, Barry?” | “这些照片哪来的 巴里” |
| [12:17] | “Stop washing my car in jean shorts, Barry.” | “别再穿着牛仔热裤洗我的车了 巴里” |
| [12:21] | D-Do you have to notify people | 你搬进新社区的时候 |
| [12:23] | when you move into a new neighborhood? | 需要通知周围邻居吗[性罪犯] |
| [12:30] | Who’s that guy? | 那家伙是谁 |
| [12:31] | A waiter? | 侍应生吗 |
| [12:32] | Yeah. A waiter who likes to hug. | 是啊 喜欢抱抱的侍应生 |
| [12:34] | Oh! Maybe it’s Bobby, the son of the serious couple. | 也许是那对严肃脸夫妻的儿子波比 |
| [12:38] | Will you stop that? | 你能别说了吗 |
| [12:39] | Hey, don’t yell at me. I’m not the one cheating on you. | 别吼我啊 给你戴绿帽的又不是我 |
| [12:42] | You know, new rule: no more talking. | 新规矩 不许说话 |
| [12:48] | You know, honey, I’m worried about the way | 亲爱的 我有点担心 |
| [12:49] | the man in that car is treating his friend. | 那辆车里的人对待朋友的方式 |
| [13:05] | What you doing? | 你在干什么呢 |
| [13:06] | Filling out an application. | 填申请表 |
| [13:08] | You’re getting a job? | 你要申请工作了吗 |
| [13:10] | No, I’m getting a medical marijuana card. | 不 我要申请医用大麻卡 |
| [13:14] | “What is your medical condition?” | “您的身体状况如何” |
| [13:18] | Stress. | 压力山大 |
| [13:20] | Brought on… | 由于 |
| [13:21] | by lack of marijuana. | 缺乏大麻 |
| [13:25] | Hey, can I… can I run something by you? | 能跟你谈件事吗 |
| [13:29] | I think Nicole’s cheating on me. | 妮可好像出轨了 |
| [13:31] | Why do you think that? | 为什么这么想 |
| [13:32] | I followed her | 我跟踪了她 |
| [13:33] | and I saw her with another guy. | 看到她跟另一个男人在一起 |
| [13:36] | That can mean a lot of things. | 有很多可能啊 |
| [13:37] | Well-well, we were supposed to go out | 我们本来要约会的 |
| [13:39] | and then she canceled last minute | 但她临时取消了 |
| [13:41] | and then she lied to me about where she was going. | 还对她去的地方撒谎了 |
| [13:44] | Bitch be cheatin’. | 这贱人肯定劈腿了 |
| [13:48] | Guess who’s dating someone new. | 猜猜谁有新对象了 |
| [13:50] | His girlfriend. | 他的女朋友 |
| [13:53] | Really? That sucks. | 不是吧 这么惨 |
| [13:55] | Her name is Gretchen, and she’s amazing. | 她叫格雷琴 人超好的 |
| [13:58] | Is this the beginning of the end | 你这是终于弃用 |
| [14:01] | of the whole Jeff Strongman thing? | 杰夫·斯壮曼这个假身份了吗 |
| [14:03] | Uh, au contraire, uh, she’s actually dating Jeff Strongman. | 恰恰相反 她的约会对象正是杰夫·斯壮曼 |
| [14:06] | She’s Larry’s sister. | 她是拉里的妹妹 |
| [14:07] | Uh, oh, and, uh, I’m still the best man in Lyndsey’s wedding. | 而且 我还是林赛婚礼的伴郎 |
| [14:11] | Standard best man stuff: | 伴郎标准事项 |
| [14:13] | Throw a bachelor party, give a toast at the wedding, | 举办单身派对 婚礼举杯祝福 |
| [14:16] | assume a false identity | 使用假身份 |
| [14:18] | and bang both the bride and the sister of the groom. | 上了新娘和新郎的妹妹 |
| [14:21] | Wow. When you put it that way, | 被你这么一说 |
| [14:22] | it sounds like a soap opera on Telemundo. | 这简直是西语电视台的肥皂剧啊 |
| [14:25] | That’s what I said! | 我也是这么说的 |
| [14:28] | What does Lyndsey think of all this? | 林赛怎么想 |
| [14:29] | I don’t know. Um, Alan hasn’t told her | 我不知道 艾伦还没告诉她 |
| [14:32] | and Jeff Strongman doesn’t care. | 而杰夫·斯壮曼不在乎 |
| [14:36] | How is it that Senor Strongman | 凭什么斯壮曼先生 |
| [14:39] | has two girls and I have none? | 有两个妞 而我屁都没有 |
| [14:42] | Because you’re not willing to lie | 因为你不愿意为了上床而撒谎 |
| [14:44] | and treat women like crap so you can get laid. | 将女性当做垃圾对待 |
| [14:47] | You’re a romantic. | 你很浪漫 |
| [14:48] | You think every girl you meet is your soul mate. | 你把遇到的每个女孩都当成是灵魂伴侣 |
| [14:51] | You’re ready to move in after the first date. | 第一次约会后就准备跟人家同居了 |
| [14:54] | We have a term for guys like you | 我们拉拉圈里是这样称呼 |
| [14:55] | in the Lesbian community. | 你们这种男人的 |
| [14:58] | It’s “lesbian”. | 就是”拉拉” |
| [15:05] | Hey. How you doing? | 你好吗 |
| [15:06] | Great. | 很好 |
| [15:08] | I didn’t sleep at all last night. | 我昨晚压根没睡 |
| [15:10] | I just kept thinking about Nicole and that guy. | 一直在想妮可和那个男人的事 |
| [15:13] | I found my first gray hair. | 我发现了第一根白发 |
| [15:15] | Not on my head. | 不是”大头”上的 |
| [15:17] | Yeah. I didn’t sleep much, either. | 我也没怎么睡 |
| [15:18] | I met up with BoobaFett420. | 我跟波霸·费特420见面了 |
| [15:21] | Turned out the “420” was in reference to her weight. | 原来420[磅]是指她的体重 |
| [15:27] | Look who it is. | 瞧瞧是谁来了 |
| [15:28] | I’m really sorry about last night, | 昨晚的事真的很抱歉 |
| [15:30] | but there’s something I want to talk to you about. | 我有点事想跟你说 |
| [15:32] | Is it your pants? | 是你的裤子吗 |
| [15:34] | ‘Cause they’re on fire. | 因为裤子被火烧了 |
| [15:34] | Liar, liar, pants on fire. | 外国俏皮话 骗子骗子 火烧裤子 |
| [15:36] | – ‘Cause you’re a liar. – What? | -因为你是个骗子 -什么 |
| [15:40] | We saw you at the restaurant with a guy last night. | 我们昨晚看到你和那个男的在餐厅 |
| [15:43] | You followed me? | 你跟踪我吗 |
| [15:44] | No, actually, we followed a really handsome guy | 不 其实我们是跟踪一个帅哥 |
| [15:47] | who you had dinner with and just happened to run into you. | 而你和他吃饭 我们碰巧看到你了 |
| [15:50] | I wanted to go to Dave and Buster’s. | 我想去的是戴夫和巴斯特餐厅 |
| [15:52] | All right. | 好吧 |
| [15:54] | Okay, I was waiting for a better time to tell you this, | 我本来想找个更好的时机再告诉你 |
| [15:56] | but the guy I had dinner with last night works for Google. | 但昨晚和我一起吃饭的那个男人在谷歌工作 |
| [16:00] | Oh… W… Get… | 哦 那么… |
| [16:01] | Barry, Google “Betrayal” and… | 巴里 谷歌下”背叛” |
| [16:03] | Oh, actually, Bing “betrayal” and let’s see what comes up. | 不 应该在必应里搜索”背叛” 看看结果 |
| [16:09] | Yep. Picture of Nicole. | 好了 妮可的照片 |
| [16:12] | I didn’t really Google it. | 其实我没真的搜索 |
| [16:13] | That’s my screen saver. | 是我的屏保 |
| [16:15] | It’s not what you think. | 不是你想的那样 |
| [16:17] | He offered me a job in San Francisco. | 他给我在旧金山提供了一个职位 |
| [16:20] | They’re working on the same technology that we are, | 他们正在和我们研发同样的技术 |
| [16:22] | and he said that I could pick my own team and that’s you guys. | 他说我可以选择自己的团队 就是你们 |
| [16:24] | Oh, my God. | 我的天 |
| [16:26] | I’ve never been picked for a team. | 我还是第一次被别人挑中加入团队 |
| [16:29] | And you’re gonna do this? | 你要同意 |
| [16:31] | We are so close. | 我们就快成功了呢 |
| [16:33] | Well, they’re a lot closer. | 他们会更快成功 |
| [16:35] | I mean, the chances of us beating Google are one in a… | 我们能战胜谷歌的几率是1比 |
| [16:39] | googol. | 天文数字[音近谷歌] |
| [16:41] | I bet we’ll get to make jokes like that | 我打赌在谷歌办公室里 |
| [16:42] | all the time at Google. | 肯定有很多机会可以开这个玩笑 |
| [16:45] | Who cares if they beat us? | 他们战胜我们又有什么关系 |
| [16:46] | We’ll create something else. | 我们研发新的 |
| [16:49] | All we have to do is | 我们要做的就是 |
| [16:50] | believe in ourselves and we can change the world. | 相信自己 我们可以改变世界 |
| [16:53] | Now, they’re giving you an opportunity to work for Google. | 他们给你一个机会为谷歌工作 |
| [16:56] | I’m giving you an opportunity to be Google. | 我给你一个机会成为谷歌 |
| [16:59] | I have to take this. I’m sorry. | 我必须接受 对不起 |
| [17:02] | So you’re just going to San Francisco? | 这么说你要去旧金山吗 |
| [17:07] | Where does that leave us? | 那我们以后呢 |
| [17:09] | Well, I mean, we were… we were just having fun, right? | 我们之间只是开心一下 不是吗 |
| [17:12] | Yeah, fun. Okay. | 对 开心 好的 |
| [17:14] | Good. I’m just… I just… | 很好 我只是 |
| [17:16] | I’m glad you’re not one of those people who thinks | 我很庆幸你不是那种人 |
| [17:18] | every person they meet is their soul mate. Or… | 觉得碰到的人全是灵魂伴侣 |
| [17:20] | that-that you would think that we were moving in | 你觉得我们上过床 |
| [17:23] | with each other just ’cause we had sex. | 所以就该开始同居 |
| [17:25] | She’s not a lesbian, dude. | 她又不是拉拉 哥们 |
| [17:29] | I gotta call the guy back. | 我得给那个人回电话 |
| [17:32] | Go ahead. | 去吧 |
| [17:33] | Good luck in San Francisco. | 祝你在旧金山好运 |
| [17:35] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [17:40] | All right. | 很好 |
| [17:46] | I’m sorry, buddy. | 抱歉 哥们 |
| [17:48] | I’m here for you. | 我支持你 |
| [17:50] | Appreciate that. | 非常感谢 |
| [17:53] | You know, actually… | 其实 |
| [17:55] | what she’s offering is a pretty good deal, so… | 她提供的机会非常难得 所以 |
| [17:58] | if you wanted to go with her… | 如果你想跟她一起走 |
| [17:59] | Oh, thank God. | 谢天谢地 |
| [18:05] | So tell me about Gretchen. | 跟我讲讲格雷琴是怎么样的人 |
| [18:07] | Well, um, there isn’t much to tell. | 没什么可说的 |
| [18:09] | I, um… I grew up in Chicago, | 我在芝加哥长大 |
| [18:11] | I went to Northwestern, became a veterinarian, | 上了西北大学 做了兽医 |
| [18:13] | married the man of my dreams | 嫁给了梦中情人 |
| [18:15] | but apparently he was dreaming of banging my best friend, so… | 但显然他梦想着上我最好的朋友 |
| [18:19] | How ’bout you? | 你呢 |
| [18:20] | Uh, I haven’t met your best friend. | 我还没见过你最好的朋友 |
| [18:22] | Is she hot? | 她漂亮吗 |
| [18:24] | You know I neuter dogs for a living. | 你知道我是靠阉割狗过生活的吧 |
| [18:26] | Are you threatening or offering? | 你是在威胁 还是提供免费服务 |
| [18:30] | So-so, uh, what brought you to L.A.? | 那么你为什么到洛杉矶来了 |
| [18:32] | Uh, just looking for a fresh start. | 想重新开始 |
| [18:34] | You know? I mean, out here, I can be whoever I want to be. | 在这里 我可以做自己想做的人 |
| [18:36] | I can reinvent myself. | 我可以重新塑造自己 |
| [18:38] | I thought about doing that. | 我也想着这样做 |
| [18:39] | But in the end, I can’t be anyone but Jeff Strongman. | 但最后 我还是只能做杰夫·斯壮曼 |
| [18:43] | Well, I wouldn’t mind a strong man in the end. | 我不介意到最后有壮男相陪 |
| [18:45] | Ooh, dirty word play. | 色情文字游戏啊 |
| [18:48] | – I’m vibrating. – I’m growing. | -我的震了 -我的长了 |
| [18:51] | No, uh… | 不 |
| [18:53] | no, our-our table’s ready. | 我们的桌子准备好了 |
| [18:54] | Oh, great, great. Uh, well, | 太好了 太好了 |
| [18:55] | let’s take our wine and have a seat. | 咱们拿上酒入座吧 |
| [18:57] | Yeah, or, um, | 是的 或者 |
| [18:58] | you know, there’s 20 minutes left in happy hour. | 还有20分钟 酒水打折时间才结束 |
| [19:00] | I mean, we could just stay here and fill up | 我们可以坐在这里 |
| [19:01] | on two-for-one appetizers and half-off drinks. | 用买一送一开胃菜和半价酒水填肚子 |
| [19:03] | Yes! | 我愿意 |
| [19:06] | I mean, you know, if that’s what you want. | 我是说 如果你想这样的话就行 |
| [19:08] | It’s just… I hate spending money unnecessarily. | 我只是讨厌花不必要花的钱 |
| [19:11] | Anything we don’t finish is going home with us. | 我们吃不完的全部打包 |
| [19:15] | I tell ’em it’s for the dogs, but… | 我跟他们说是给狗吃的 但是 |
| [19:17] | woof. | 汪汪 |
| [19:19] | Gretchen… | 格雷琴 |
| [19:22] | do you believe in love at first sight? | 你相信一见钟情吗 |
| [19:46] | What the hell is “Wine-ish”? | 什么叫”酒精饮品”啊 |
| [19:53] | How was the date? | 约会怎么样 |
| [19:54] | Best… date… ever. | 有史以来最棒的约会 |
| [19:57] | We are perfect for each other. | 我们绝对是天造地设的一对 |
| [19:59] | It’s like… it’s like God cloned me | 就好像上帝克隆了一个我 |
| [20:01] | and gave me boobs and a vagina. | 又给我装了咪咪和阴道 |
| [20:05] | Alan, can’t you see that this Jeff Strongman stuff | 艾伦 你为什么不明白这个杰夫·斯壮曼 |
| [20:08] | is only gonna cause you problems? | 只会给你带来麻烦呢 |
| [20:10] | Actually, I’m starting to think Alan Harper is the problem. | 事实上 我开始觉得艾伦·哈勃才是问题所在 |
| [20:12] | I mean, Jeff Strongman has a girlfriend, a best friend | 杰夫·斯壮曼有女友 有最好的朋友 |
| [20:15] | and he’s practically debt-free. | 而且几乎是无债一身轻 |
| [20:17] | Practically? | 几乎 |
| [20:18] | He may have received a free credit card offer | 他收到了免费开信用卡的邀请 |
| [20:20] | that was a little too good to pass up. | 条件太好 不忍拒绝 |
| [20:23] | Jeff Strongman has a credit card? | 杰夫·斯壮曼居然有信用卡吗 |
| [20:27] | And get this, Alan Harper got 100 bucks for referring Jeff. | 而且艾伦·哈勃因推荐杰夫开卡拿了一百回扣哦 |
| [20:36] | Now I just need to figure out a way to get rid of Alan Harper. | 现在我只需要想办法 除掉艾伦·哈勃 |
| [20:40] | It’s not as easy as you think! | 没你想得那么简单 |
| [20:47] | Barry. | 巴里 |
| [20:48] | I thought about what you said | 我一直在想你说的话 |
| [20:49] | and I decided… | 我决定 |
| [20:51] | I want to stay and work with you. | 我要留下来和你一起工作 |
| [20:52] | I mean, I don’t want to work for Google. | 我不想为谷歌工作 |
| [20:54] | I want to be Google. | 我要成为谷歌 |
| [20:55] | – Really? – Yeah. | -真的吗 -是的 |
| [20:57] | I want to change the world. | 我要改变世界 |
| [21:02] | We’re gonna do great things together. | 我们会一起创造传奇 |
| [21:04] | Hell, yeah, we are. | 那是当然 |
| [21:07] | All right. | 好了 |
| [21:11] | So where do I sleep? | 那我睡在哪里 |