| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | Charlie lived life to its fullest and-and gave it everything he had. | Charlie的一生过的非常充实 竭尽所能活的精彩 |
| [00:06] | Gave me herpes. | 给了我疱疹 |
| [00:08] | Vaginal warts. | 阴道疣 |
| [00:10] | He used my panties to make tea. | 他会用我的内裤泡茶 |
| [00:13] | My point is, um, that Charlie lived life on his own terms. | 最主要的是 Charlie活出了自己的生活方式 |
| [00:18] | Blah, blah, blah.Why can’t we see the body? | 一堆废话 为啥不能看遗体? |
| [00:21] | Charlie Harper was the love of my life and a wonderful, wonderful man. | Charlie Harper是我毕生挚爱 他是个非常好的男人 |
| [00:26] | He slipped on the Metro platform and fell in front of an oncoming train. | 他在地铁平台上滑到了 然后摔倒在了飞驰而来的火车前面 |
| [00:30] | His body just exploded like a balloon full of meat. | 他的身体爆炸了 像个充满了肉的气球一样 |
| [00:35] | I know what you said you wanted, but… | 我知道你说过你想要这样 但是… |
| [00:38] | I really don’t think Pamela Anderson will agree to swallow your ashes. | 我真心不觉得Pamela Anderson 会同意把你的骨灰吞下去的 |
| [00:56] | I ain’t cleaning him up. | 我可不扫 |
| [01:01] | Imagine me and you, I do | |
| [01:04] | I think about you day and night It’s only right | |
| [01:08] | To think about the boy you love And hold him tight | |
| [01:12] | So happy together | |
| [01:15] | So how is the weather? | |
| [01:25] | Lunchtime. | 该吃午饭了 |
| [01:28] | Here you go. | 给你 |
| [01:30] | Tuna on toast…with vodka. | 吞拿鱼吐司…还有伏特加 |
| [01:35] | Oh, don’t give me that look.It needs to eat. | 别那么看着我 它需要进食 (故意用的它”it”) |
| [01:41] | Oh, is it sulking? | 它是在生闷气吗? |
| [01:43] | Well, if it doesn’t eat, it gets the hose. | 要么吃 要么被浇水哦 (沉默的羔羊里的囚禁情节一样咳) |
| [01:49] | That’s better. | 这就对了 |
| [01:51] | And pick up the napkin. | 把餐巾捡起来 |
| [01:53] | Just because it lives in a pit, it doesn’t have to live like an animal. | 虽然它生活在矿井里 也不用像个动物一样啊 |
| [01:57] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [02:00] | And after it eats, it changes its clothes. | 吃饭完之后 就该换衣服了 |
| [02:08] | Two and a Half Men Season 12 Episode 15:Of Course He’s Dead Part 1 | -=伊甸园美剧 http://bbs.sfile2012.co 小貂给好汉送终 小貂还是更喜欢前五季 CL还真是小心眼 把Charlie Sheen黑出翔- – 好汉两个半 |
| [02:21] | Got any good mail? | 有有用的信吗? |
| [02:22] | Uh let’s see.Uh, electric bill, cable bill, water bill.Here you go. | 看一下 电费账单 有线电视账单 水费账单 都是你的 |
| [02:28] | Do you ever experience shame? | 你知道羞耻两个字怎么写吗? |
| [02:30] | Uh, shame is a rich man’s emotion. | 羞耻是有钱人才会有的情绪 |
| [02:32] | I can barely afford embarrassment. | 我连尴尬都负担不起呢 |
| [02:36] | Oh, wow.Something for Charlie. | 竟然有给Charlie的信 |
| [02:39] | I-I told you to cancel his subscription to the Sex Toy of the Month Club. | 我都给你说了 把他订阅的月送性玩具取消掉 |
| [02:44] | Oh, can’t.He paid for life. | 别想了 他是终生订阅的 |
| [02:47] | And, uh, January was butt plug month. | 一月的是肛门插 |
| [02:53] | Oh.Oh, it’s, uh…it’s from his music publisher. | 是他音乐出版商来的信 |
| [03:01] | You okay? | 你还好吗? |
| [03:03] | I’m-I’m…I’m not sure.Look. | 我 我…我不知道 看这个 |
| [03:08] | Dear Mr.Harper: “We are holding unclaimed music royalties | 亲爱的Harper先生: “我们持有您尚未领取的 |
| [03:12] | for you in the amount of $2.5 million.” | 250万美元的音乐版权费” |
| [03:18] | Looks like those children’s records he made are still making money. | 看来他写的那些广告歌还在赚钱 |
| [03:21] | – Uh, say the number again. – 2.5 million. | – 再说一遍多少钱 – 250万刀 |
| [03:26] | Apparently, it’s been stacking up since he died. | 应该从他死后开始 一直累积到了这么多 |
| [03:29] | Like the butt plugs. | 就像那些肛门插一样 |
| [03:34] | Alan, you do realize that money will go to his next of kin. | Alan 你知不知道 这笔钱是要给他最近的血亲的 |
| [03:37] | Uh, yeah.That’s me.Why do think I keep going… | 当然了 不就是我 不然你以为我干嘛要一直… |
| [03:41] | What about your mother and his daughter? | 那你妈和他女儿怎么办? |
| [03:45] | Oh, you’re serious. | 天哪 你是认真的 |
| [03:47] | Alan, you can’t keep that kind of money secret from them. | Alan 你不能不告诉她们有那笔钱 |
| [03:51] | Why not?I kept from you that I used your Tesla to drive for Uber. | 为什么不能? 你就不知道我用你的特斯拉去接Uber啊 |
| [03:57] | Hello.Yes,I-I just received a notice of unclaimed royalties for Charlie Harper | 你好 我刚收到了一份关于Charlie Harper 版权费无人认领的通知 |
| [04:02] | that I would like to claim.Oh, oh, yeah, sure, I’ll hold. | 我愿意认领 对的对的 我会等的 |
| [04:06] | – What are you doing? – Uh, claiming. | – 你在干嘛? – 认领啊 |
| [04:09] | Uh, yes, yes.Hi.Uh, I am, uh, Alan Harper. | 对的 你好 我是Alan Harper |
| [04:11] | Uh, I’m Charlie Harper’s next of kin. | Charlie Harper最近的血亲 |
| [04:13] | Yes, uh, uh, sadly, he-he passed away four years ago. | 对 不幸的是 他四年前去世了 |
| [04:17] | Yes, I-I am sorry, too.Uh, he’s irreplaceable. | 我也很难过 他是无可替代的 |
| [04:26] | Uh,anyway,um…I guess you can just,you know,send me the check and… | 总之…我觉得 你可以把支票寄给我… |
| [04:32] | Uh, death certificate? | 死亡证明? |
| [04:36] | Uh, o-okay, uh, is that…is that necessary to get the money? | 好吧 那是… 拿到那笔钱必须要用的东西吗? |
| [04:40] | Okay.Uh, how about, uh, you send me the check, | 好吧 不然这样 你把钱寄给我 |
| [04:43] | I’ll send you the death certificate? | 我就把死亡证明寄给你? |
| [04:48] | Or we can do it your way. | 或者按你们的方式来 |
| [04:51] | Uh,uh,oh,oh,and by the way,um,uh,when you give me the money, | 还有 你们给我那笔钱时 |
| [04:54] | do you notify the IRS, or is that my responsibility? | 是你们通知美国国税局呢 还是我自己来? |
| [04:58] | Mine!Perfect. | 我来! 太棒了 |
| [05:00] | Uh, bye-bye.Our divorce is final, right? | 再见 我们的婚姻结束了 对吧? |
| [05:04] | Alan, I neither want nor need your money. | Alan 我不想也不需要你的钱 |
| [05:07] | – Oh,I know that,uh,but could you say that again on camera?- O-Okay, okay. | – 好嘞 你能再说一次吗 我录下来? – 停停 |
| [05:12] | You don’t have the death certificate, do you? | 你没有那个死亡证明吧? |
| [05:14] | No, but I’m sure my mom does. | 没 但是我妈肯定有 |
| [05:16] | How are you going to get it from her without telling her about the money? | 那你要是不告诉她有这么一笔钱的话 怎么能拿到证明? |
| [05:18] | Uh, remember four years ago how I told you I’d only be here for a few days? | 你还记得四年前我是怎么跟你说 我只在这住几天的吗? |
| [05:22] | I think I can figure it out. | 我搞的定的 |
| [05:27] | I can’t wait for this to be over. | 我迫不及待的想要结束这一切了 |
| [05:32] | Well, this is a surprise. | 真是太阳打西边出来了 |
| [05:34] | You visit so seldom. | 你很少来的 |
| [05:36] | I know.I know.I need to do it more. | 我知道 我应该勤来的 |
| [05:39] | I wasn’t complaining. | 我那不是抱怨 |
| [05:43] | So, how have you been? | 最近过得怎么样? |
| [05:45] | Well, uh, uh, it’s funny you should ask. | 你会问这个 太搞笑了 |
| [05:47] | Um, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately. | 我最近想了很多 |
| [05:49] | I’m not giving you a penny. | 我一分钱都不会给你的 |
| [05:52] | I, uh…I didn’t come for money. | 我 其实不是为了钱来的 |
| [05:53] | Or a place to live or a car. | 住的地方 车 都别想 |
| [05:55] | Or affection or nurturing.I get it. | 也不会有喜爱和培养 我懂的 |
| [05:57] | Uh, uh, I was thinking.You know, um, well, maybe it’s my age, but, | 我一直在思考 或许是到了这个年纪了 |
| [06:01] | uh, I’m starting to reflect on the big questions. | 不过我开始去想一些大问题 |
| [06:03] | You know, what’s…what’s it all about?Uh, why are we here? | 比如 万物的终极? 我们生活的意义? |
| [06:06] | What happens when we die? | 死的时候会是怎么样的? |
| [06:07] | I know what happens when I die.You get nothing. | 我知道我死的时候会是怎么样的 你什么都得不到的 |
| [06:11] | Mom, I-I told you, I did not come here…Really?Nothing? | 妈 我都说了 我这次来不是为了… 真的? 啥都得不到? |
| [06:15] | It’s not because I don’t love you. | 不是因为我不爱你 |
| [06:17] | I just don’t want to give you a reason to kill me. | 而是我不想给你杀死我的理由 |
| [06:20] | You mean another reason. | 你是说再多一个理由吧 |
| [06:29] | Where are all these morbid thoughts coming from? | 这些病态的想法都是哪里来的? |
| [06:32] | As long as I’ve known you, you’ve never been much of a thinker. | 从我了解的你来看 你从来就不是想事情的料 |
| [06:35] | Or a…a doer or a provider or… | 或者是实干家 奉献的人… |
| [06:40] | pretty much anything with “er” at the end. | 基本就是一无是处 |
| [06:43] | Maybe I’ve been asking all these questions because | 我问的这些问题都是因为 |
| [06:47] | – the anniversary of Charlie’s death is coming up. – So? | – Charlie的忌日快到了 – 然后呢? |
| [06:50] | So I was thinking it might be nice to do something to commemorate it. | 我就想或许做点什么纪念一下比较好 |
| [06:53] | Like what?Snort coke off a hooker’s butt? | 比如? 在妓女的屁股上吸可卡因? (讽刺Charlie Sheen- -) |
| [06:59] | Uh, actually, uh, uh, more like, uh, make a…a memorial collage. | 其实 更像是 做一个…纪念册 |
| [07:04] | A what? | 一个什么? |
| [07:07] | A…a memorial collage. | 一个纪念册 |
| [07:08] | You know, a collection of images celebrating his life. | 就是 收集一些图片来记录他的一生 |
| [07:11] | Uh, things like, uh, his birth certificate, uh, family pictures, | 比如 他的出生证明 家庭合照 |
| [07:14] | death certificate, uh, awards, sheet music, diplomas, death certificate, um… | 死亡证明 奖状 乐谱 学位证 死亡证明… |
| [07:19] | I don’t know how much I can help you. | 我也不知道能帮到多少 |
| [07:21] | I-I’ve got his birth certificate, a few baby pictures, | 我有他的出生证明 几张他婴儿时的照片 |
| [07:23] | the little hash pipe he made in camp. | 他露营时候做的大麻烟斗 |
| [07:27] | No death certificate? | 没有死亡证明? |
| [07:29] | No.I-I just thought you had it. | 没有 我以为在你那呢 |
| [07:31] | Oh.Well, bye. | 好吧 再见 |
| [07:37] | I’m sorry.I can’t find any record of your brother’s death. | 不好意思 我找不到任何 关于你哥哥的死亡的记录 |
| [07:40] | You sure?Uh, newspapers, obituaries? | 你确定? 报纸 讣告都没有? |
| [07:42] | No,I checked everything on Charlie Harper–both here and in France–and… | 没 所有有关Charlie Harper的一切 我都查过了 这边的还有法国的 |
| [07:46] | I-I found a bunch of weird self-shot sex videos, | 我倒是找到了一堆 奇怪的自拍的性爱录影带 |
| [07:51] | including one featuring what appears to be the USC men’s water polo team? | 有一个的特写还是 南加州大学男子水球队? |
| [07:57] | I also found this crazy rant about a former employer. | 我还发现了这个对前任雇主的咆哮体 |
| [08:11] | But there’s nothing about his death. | 不过就是没有关于他死亡的消息 |
| [08:13] | – How is that possible? – Did you ever see the body? | – 怎么可能? – 你有看过遗体吗? |
| [08:15] | There was no body.The man was hit by a train. | 没有遗体了 他是被火车撞死的 |
| [08:17] | All that was left was a…a meat smoothie and a couple of teeth. | 就只剩下了一坨肉酱还有几颗牙齿 |
| [08:21] | Well, how do you know he’s really dead? | 那你怎么知道他是不是真的死了? |
| [08:23] | Well, of course he’s dead.I have his ashes. | 他当然死了 我还有他的骨灰呢 |
| [08:25] | How do you know that they’re his ashes? | 你怎么知道那是他的骨灰? |
| [08:27] | Well, what do you want me to do, test them for herpes? | 那我能怎么办 看看他们有没有疱疹? |
| [08:34] | Twinkle, twinkle, little star | |
| [08:38] | I always know just where you are | |
| [08:41] | In a pit below my house | |
| [08:45] | You will always be my spouse. | |
| [08:52] | Oh, boy. | 天哪 |
| [08:59] | Never put a window in a dungeon. | 地牢里不能有窗户的 |
| [09:14] | Yes,I am calling about the $2.5 million in unclaimed royalties for Charlie Harper. | 我打来是想问关于Charlie Harper 那250万美元的未认领的版权费的 |
| [09:20] | Uh, uh, good news. | 好消息是 |
| [09:21] | Uh, I have just received the death certificate from France. | 我刚刚收到了法国发来的死亡证明 |
| [09:25] | Uh, it’s in French and everything so you know it’s real. | 因为是法语的 保真 |
| [09:29] | Oh, oh, sure, I’ll hold. | 好的 我会等下 |
| [09:31] | Uh, “cause de d茅c猫s.” Uh… 死亡原因 | |
| [09:35] | uh, Le… train. | 火车 |
| [09:41] | Oh, yes, yes, I’m still here. | 说吧 我在听 |
| [09:43] | What?It’s already been claimed? | 什么? 已经被领走了? |
| [09:46] | By whom? | 谁领的? |
| [09:48] | Was it an older red-headed woman wearing a coat made of Dalmatians? | 是不是一个穿着斑点大衣的红头发女人? |
| [09:54] | What do you mean, you can’t tell me? | 什么叫不能告诉我? |
| [09:56] | A…a numbered account in the Cayman Islands?That makes no sense. | 开曼群岛的一个账号? 不可能啊 |
| [09:59] | FedEx just dropped off a box addressed to Charlie. | 联邦快递刚送来了Charlie的包裹 |
| [10:03] | Uh…uh, uh, I’ll call you back. | 我回头再打给你 |
| [10:07] | If that’s a blow-up sex doll, can I have it? | 如果是个充气娃娃的话 能给我吗? |
| [10:11] | My grandkids need a pool toy. | 我的孙子们需要泳池玩具的 |
| [10:17] | – Cuban cigars? – Charlie’s favorite smokes. | – 古巴雪茄? – Charlie的最爱 |
| [10:22] | Single malt scotch? | 单芽苏格兰威士忌? |
| [10:24] | Charlie’s favorite breakfast. | Charlie最爱的早餐 |
| [10:28] | What the hell? | 这是什么鬼? |
| [10:29] | Looks the knife he used to chase you around the house with. | 看起来像从前他在房子里 追杀你时用的刀 |
| [10:35] | Yeah, that’s it. | 嗯 是它 |
| [10:41] | “I’m coming home, and you’re going to pay.” | “我要回家了 你该付出代价了” |
| [10:45] | That’s got to be a wrong number.You never pay for anything. | 肯定是发错了 你什么都不带付的 |
| [10:53] | – Walden! – Alan? | |
| [10:55] | Ms.McMartin, I’m sorry.Uh, where’s Walden? | McMartin小姐 不好意思 Walden在哪呢? |
| [10:57] | I’m a little busy, Alan. | 我这边有点忙 Alan |
| [10:59] | Oh,okay.Uh,are-are you aware she’s reading Cosmo? | 你知道她在看时尚杂志吧? |
| [11:03] | It’s a how-to article. | 是篇教授怎么做的文章 |
| [11:05] | Well, it’s not so much “how to,” as “how to do it better.” | 不是”怎么做”而是”怎么更有技巧” |
| [11:09] | Seriously? | 要不要这样? |
| [11:11] | Hey.Even Tiger Woods needs a swing coach. | 就算是老虎伍兹 也需要挥杆教练的 |
| [11:15] | – Listen,can you just come back in,like,what,20 minutes? – Eh…No. | – 你等下再来行吗 20分钟? – 不行 |
| [11:21] | This can’t wait.Look at this text. | 这个是急事 看这条短信 |
| [11:24] | Okay, that can’t be for you.You never pay for anything. | 绝对不是发给你的 你什么都不带付的 |
| [11:28] | I think, somehow, some way…Charlie is still alive. | 我有种感觉 Charlie有可能还活着 |
| [11:31] | – Okay, this is ridiculous. – There’s more. | – 这太可笑了 – 还有 |
| [11:34] | A package came addressed to him. | 有个包裹 写的是他的名字地址 |
| [11:36] | Oh, is it something that vibrates? | 是会震动的东西吗? |
| [11:39] | ‘Cause I could really use some help with this. | 我可能能用上�G |
| [11:42] | He ain’t lying. | 他说的是真的 |
| [11:45] | No.It’s-it’s-it’s not sex toys. | 没有 不是情趣玩具 |
| [11:47] | I am telling you, Charlie is coming back, and he is not happy with me. | 我跟你讲 Charlie要回来了 而且他对我很不满 |
| [11:50] | Well, at the moment, neither am I. | 其实 此时此刻 我也一样 |
| [11:52] | – Should I go? – No,no,no,no,no.We’re so close. | – 我要不要走? – 别别别 我们就快成功了 |
| [11:57] | Walden, it’s like you said. | Walden 就像你说的 |
| [11:58] | I mean, there was no proof that Charlie ever died. | 没有证据证明Charlie死了 |
| [12:01] | – All we have is Rose’s word. – Who’s Rose? | – 我们有的只是Rose的一面之词 – Rose是谁? |
| [12:03] | Oh, she’s this crazy millionairess that used to stalk Charlie, | 她是之前跟踪Charlie的一个百万富疯婆 |
| [12:07] | and then he married her.And then she started stalking me. | 然后他们结婚了 之后她就开始跟踪我 |
| [12:10] | Why?Did you sleep with her? | 为什么? 你跟她上床了? |
| [12:13] | Alan slept with her, too. | Alan也跟她上床了 |
| [12:16] | Hey, after 12 years, everybody’s slept with everybody. | 也有12年了 大家也该互相都睡过了 |
| [12:19] | Alan!Alan, where are you? | Alan! Alan 你在哪? |
| [12:22] | – Uh, in here! – Oh, for God sakes! | – 这儿呢! – 天哪! |
| [12:25] | That’s my mother.Uh,oh,Walden slept with her,too. | 是我妈 Walden跟她也睡了 |
| [12:27] | Uh…you slept with my mom! | 你跟我妈还睡了呢! |
| [12:29] | No, that was just a handy in a hotel bar.I am a gentleman. | 没有 只在酒店吧台那儿手了一下 我可是个有节操的人 |
| [12:35] | We need to talk.Oh.Who’s this? | 我们得谈谈 这位是? |
| [12:38] | Uh, this is my son’s social worker, Ms.McMartin. | 这位是我儿子的社工 McMartin小姐 |
| [12:41] | And you’re shtupping her.How lovely. | 你在跟她睡啊 不错嘛 |
| [12:43] | Uh, Mom, don’t be rude.Uh, and I shtupped her first. | 妈 文明点 还有是我先睡了她的 |
| [12:47] | I really should go. | 我真是该走了 |
| [12:48] | Yeah.Uh, okay.Just remember which step we’re on. | 好吧 记得我们到第几步了 |
| [12:52] | Number six: “finding the little man in the canoe.” | 第六步: “找到独木舟里的小人” |
| [12:56] | – I don’t remember you having any trouble… – Okay, everybody stop! | – 我不记得你有这方面的问题… – 都给我打住! |
| [13:01] | What are you doing here? | 你来干嘛? |
| [13:02] | I want to know why you sent me this hateful e-mail. | 我想知道你干嘛给我发了一封 如此怨念的电子邮件 |
| [13:06] | Uh, “Dear Mom: “You were always a horrible mother | “亲爱的妈妈: 你一直都是个糟糕的母亲” |
| [13:10] | “and a repulsive human being, “and I hope you rot in hell. | 一个令人生厌的人 我希望你在地狱里腐烂吧 |
| [13:13] | “But before you do, I will have my revenge.” | 但是在这之前 我要进行我的复仇” |
| [13:18] | Okay, I don’t disagree with anything here… | 虽然我同意这里的每一个字… |
| [13:22] | – but I did not send that. – Really? | – 但那不是我发的 – 真的? |
| [13:24] | Who else would call me “a horrible mother”? | 那还有谁能说我是个”糟糕的母亲”? |
| [13:27] | No, no, it’s still ridiculous. | 不可能 太可笑了 |
| [13:30] | What’s ridiculous? | 什么太可笑了? |
| [13:31] | Alan has this crazy idea that Charlie’s still alive. | Alan 有个疯狂的想法 他觉得Charlie还活着 |
| [13:34] | But then who sent her that e-mail?Who sent me this text? | 不然是谁发了这封电子邮件? 又是谁给我发的短信? |
| [13:37] | Where did the cigars, booze and chasin’ knife come from? | 那些烟酒跟追逐刀又是哪儿来的? |
| [13:40] | Wait, what’s a chasin’ knife? | 什么是追逐刀? |
| [13:42] | Uh, it’s a regular knife after two bottles of scotch and some blow. | 就是两瓶威士忌外加一些毒品之后 用的普通的刀 |
| [13:47] | – Who else would have sent it? – I don’t know. | – 还有谁能寄来这些? – 我不知道啊 |
| [13:50] | Like, somebody that wants to freak you out. | 没准是有人想吓唬你呢 |
| [13:52] | Think about it: Who has something to gain from this? | 想想看: 这样的话谁能从中获益? |
| [13:54] | Who else has a claim on that money? | 谁能得到这笔钱? |
| [13:56] | – What money? – No money.There’s no money. | – 什么钱? – 没钱 什么钱都没有 |
| [13:58] | Alan, will you just tell her? | Alan 你能老实告诉她吗? |
| [14:02] | I don’t want to. | 不想 |
| [14:04] | Alan! | |
| [14:06] | Turns out,uh,there are some unclaimed royalties,uh,from Charlie’s recordings. | 好吧 其实是Charlie之前的音乐 有一些还没领取的版权费 |
| [14:12] | – How much? – Uh, two and a half… | – 有多少? – 两千… |
| [14:15] | – thousand dollars. – Alan! | – 五百刀 百万 250万 |
| [14:21] | Ah, the memorial collage. | 那个纪念册 |
| [14:25] | That’s why you wanted the death certificate– so you could claim the money. | 怪不得你想要死亡证明– 这样你就能拿到那笔钱了 |
| [14:29] | You dirty rat bastard. | 你个肮脏的人渣 |
| [14:31] | What would you have done? | 那如果是你你会怎么做? |
| [14:34] | We’re wasting time here. | 我们在浪费时间 |
| [14:37] | Now, who else could have a claim on the money? | 那现在 谁还能拿到那笔钱? |
| [14:40] | Oh, God! | 哦 爽! |
| [14:42] | Ah, damn it.She found the little man without me. | 该死 她自己就找到了那个小人了 |
| [14:49] | Anyway,we were thinking of putting together a sort of memorial collage… | 总之 我们在想拼成一个纪念册… |
| [14:54] | Oh, for God sakes, will you just tell her? | 看在上帝的份上 你们跟她说实话好吗 |
| [14:56] | Um, some money owed to your father has been discovered. | 有一笔属于你爸的钱 |
| [15:02] | Really?How much? | 真的吗? 有多少? |
| [15:03] | – Two and a half thousand. – Million. | – 两千五 – 百万 |
| [15:05] | It’s $2.5 million. | 是250万 |
| [15:08] | Why are you here? | 你为什么要掺合进来? |
| [15:09] | You know what?I’ve been asking myself that since day one. | 从第一天起我也在问自己这个问题 |
| [15:26] | Honestly, I forgot she was here. | 说实话 我都忘了她在这儿了 |
| [15:30] | Look,anyway,somebody claimed it and | 总之 有人领取了这笔钱 |
| [15:32] | transferred it into a numbered account in the Caymans. | 然后把它转到了开曼群岛的一个账户上 |
| [15:35] | And you think it was me? | 你们觉得是我领的? |
| [15:36] | Would I be living in a one-bedroom apartment if I had that kind of money? | 如果我有那笔钱的话 我还会住在一个单室公寓里吗? |
| [15:49] | I don’t have my contacts in.Was that the same one or different? | 我刚有点懵 刚刚那是同一个人吗? |
| [15:54] | Excuse me. | 稍等一下 |
| [15:56] | Wow.You hang a penis on that girl, and you’ve got Charlie. | 给你一个小弟弟 根本就是Charlie在世了嘛 |
| [16:01] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [16:02] | Huh.Certified letter from a law firm. | 律师事务所发来的认证信 |
| [16:05] | Might mean traveling money.Stand by. | 或许是交通费了 等着 |
| [16:08] | – Oh, my God. – What is it? | – 我的天哪 – 写的什么? |
| [16:11] | Am I seeing that right?That’s a lot of zeroes. | 我没看错吧? 好多个零 |
| [16:13] | It’s a cashier’s check for $100,000. | 是张10万刀的现金支票 |
| [16:17] | – Who’s it from? – I don’t know. | – 谁寄来的? – 不知道 |
| [16:20] | Oh, but there’s a note. | 不过有张纸条 |
| [16:22] | It says, “Buy yourself something nice.Sorry I wasn’t there for you.” | 上面写”给自己买点好的东西 抱歉没有一直陪在�蒙肀�” |
| [16:25] | I don’t care who it’s from.Apology accepted. | 不管是谁寄来的 不过道歉接受了 |
| [16:29] | Is the bathroom in here? | 洗手间是在里面吗? |
| [16:35] | “Buy yourself something nice.”Sorry I broke your heart… | “给自己买点好的东西” 对不起我伤了你的心… |
| [16:38] | “and banged your sister. | 还睡了你妹妹 |
| [16:41] | As I write this, I realize those two things might be related.” | 我写这个时 突然意识到这两件事是有联系的” |
| [16:48] | Hmm.Screw my sister. | 好吧 我妹妹那都不叫事儿 |
| [16:54] | “Buy yourself something nice.”Sorry I shot you. | “给自己买点好的东西 对不起我打伤了你 |
| [16:59] | I didn’t know I was loaded. | 我不知道枪里有子弹” |
| [17:04] | “Buy yourself something nice. | “给你自己买点好的东西 |
| [17:06] | Tell your mom I’m sorry I gave her chlamydia.” | 告诉你妈妈 传染了性病给她 很抱歉” |
| [17:14] | “Sorry I never called.Buy yourself a nice vagina.” Aw. | “很抱歉再也没联系过你 给自己买个好阴道吧” |
| [17:25] | Well, obviously Jenny didn’t claim the royalties. | 好吧 很显然 Jenny并没有去拿那笔钱 |
| [17:27] | Why would she send a check to herself? | 不然她怎么会给自己寄张支票? |
| [17:29] | Yeah, but you still don’t know it was Charlie. | 对 但还是不知道那就是Charlie啊 |
| [17:31] | Oh, who else is going to send an unemployed lesbian actress $100,000? | 还有谁会给一个失业的 同性恋女演员寄10万刀? |
| [17:36] | I don’t know.Ellen DeGeneres? | 不知道 Ellen DeGeneres? |
| [17:40] | I’m telling you, Charlie’s alive. | 我跟你说 Charlie肯定还活着 |
| [17:42] | Oh, good.Then I don’t have to tell you. | 那就好 我就不用告诉你了 |
| [17:57] | Charlie is still alive? | Charlie还活着? |
| [17:59] | Yeah, kinda. | 算是吧 |
| [18:02] | What do you mean,”kinda”?’Cause she”kinda”drank when she was pregnant with me | 什么叫”算是”? 她还是”算是”喝醉了才怀上的我的呢 |
| [18:05] | and now I “kinda” can’t do math. | 搞的我现在”算是”数学很差 |
| [18:09] | – Hey. | – Hey.What are you still doing here? – 嘿 – 嘿 你怎么还在这儿? |
| [18:11] | Oh, I accidentally fell asleep in Zippy’s room. | 我不小心在寄生虫的房间里睡着了 |
| [18:14] | How do you accidentally fall asleep? | 睡着还能不小心的? |
| [18:17] | You accidentally wash down your pain pills with scotch. | 不小心把止疼片混威士忌喝下去后就能了 |
| [18:24] | What’s Fatal Attraction doing here? | 致命诱惑在这儿做什么? |
| [18:27] | – She says that Charlie is still alive. – I knew it. | – 她说Charlie还活着 – 我就知道 |
| [18:32] | Alan, if you move out and Charlie stays here with Walden, | Alan 如果是你搬出去了 Charlie在这跟Walden呆在一起的话 |
| [18:38] | I believe that we can keep this going for another five years. | 我觉得我们可以这样再拍五年 |
| [18:46] | Yeah, I don’t think so. | 我可不觉得 |
| [18:49] | Uh…so, uh…what exactly happened to Charlie? | Charlie到底怎么了? |
| [18:52] | Yeah, start from the beginning. | 从开头讲起 |
| [18:54] | You mean from the pilot? | 从第一集试播集讲起吗? |
| [18:56] | No, uh, what happened to my brother after you married him? | 不是 是你们结婚之后发生了什么? |
| [18:59] | Oh.Well, we had a wonderful wedding, | 我们举行了一个很棒的婚礼 |
| [19:02] | and then we flew to Paris for our honeymoon. | 然后飞去巴黎度蜜月 |
| [19:05] | We were so happy.So animated. | 我们很开心 也很卡通… |
| [19:12] | We went up on the Eiffel Tower… | 上至埃菲尔铁塔… |
| [19:15] | and went down on the Champs-Elyses. | 下到香榭丽舍 |
| [19:21] | Afterwards,we celebrated our love with a romantic candlelit dinner at the Ritz. | 之后 我们在丽兹酒店共享烛光晚餐 来庆祝我们的爱情 |
| [19:35] | Of course, I’ve always known Charlie was no saint, | 虽然我一直知道Charlie不是什么好鸟 |
| [19:38] | but I thought marriage would change him. | 但我想婚姻能够改变他 |
| [19:40] | Huh?I was wrong. | 但我错了 |
| [19:43] | So wrong. | 大错特错 |
| [19:46] | Huh.Disturbingly wrong. | 错的离谱 |
| [19:49] | I ran from the room, determined to never see him again. | 我逃离开了房间 发誓再也不想见到他 |
| [19:53] | Charlie… | |
| [19:54] | He finally caught up with me at the train station, | 他最后在火车站追上了我 |
| [19:57] | but all I could think about was…revenge. | 但我满脑子想的都是…报复 |
| [20:01] | But at the last second, fate intervened. | 但在最后一刻 命运从中作梗了 |
| [20:05] | So I booked us a cruise home. | 于是我订了邮轮票回来 |
| [20:10] | We moved in to a brand-new house in Sherman Oaks– | 我们搬去了在谢尔曼奥克斯的新家 |
| [20:14] | the good part,south of the boulevard–where we could live as a happy couple. | 地段优越 大道以南 在那里我们像一对恩爱的夫妻一样生活 |
| [20:18] | Wait a minute.You bought a house with a dungeon? | 等等 你买了一栋带地牢的房子? |
| [20:22] | – And a pit? – Of course not.I had it remodeled. | – 还有一个坑井? – 当然不是 我改造过了 |
| [20:25] | The permit process was just a nightmare. | 整个审批程序简直是场噩梦 |
| [20:28] | Next time, use my pit guy.He’s the best. | 下次你可以找帮我做坑井的人 他做的可好了 |
| [20:32] | Continue. | 接着说 |
| [20:34] | For the next four years, we were the happiest we’d ever been. | 接下来的四年是我们最幸福的时光 |
| [20:38] | I’d feed him… | 我给他喂吃的… |
| [20:40] | bathe him… | 给他洗澡… |
| [20:41] | and, of course,there was endless magical lovemaking. | 当然 还有数不清的梦幻爱爱 |
| [20:46] | Then, a few days ago,the unthinkable happened. | 但几天前 意想不到的事发生了 |
| [20:50] | Somehow he managed to make a rope out of his bowling shirts and ran away, | 他设法用他的保龄球衫做成了绳子 然后逃跑了 |
| [20:54] | disappearing into the darkness. | 消失在黑夜中 |
| [20:59] | Th-Th-Th-That’s all, folks. | 就这些啦 小伙伴们 |
| [21:03] | *** | 华纳影视 |
| [21:06] | Two and a Half Men Season 12 Episode 16:Of Course He’s Dead Part 2 | 好汉两个半 |
| [21:12] | Charlie escaped? | Charlie逃跑了? |
| [21:14] | Uh, no.Prisoners escape. | 不 囚犯才会逃跑 |
| [21:17] | Lovers run away because they’re afraid of commitment. | 情人不告而别是因为他们害怕承诺 |
| [21:21] | Any-who, I just thought I should tell you. | 我就是觉得应该告诉你们一声 |
| [21:23] | You know, in case he drops by and guts you all like fish. | 以防他顺便来访 然后把你们都开肠破肚了 |
| [21:27] | Why me?He doesn’t even know me. | 关我什么事? 他都不认识我 |
| [21:30] | Oh,I told him all about you–how you’re richer than him, prettier than him, | 你的事我都跟他说过 像是你比他有钱啦 比他帅啦 |
| [21:33] | and moved into his house and carried on like he never existed. | 还有你住进了他的大房子 继续你的生活当他从没存在过啦 |
| [21:38] | Thank you. | 我谢你全家啊 |
| [21:41] | Hold on, Rose. | 等一下 Rose |
| [21:43] | If Charlie is alive, who’s in the urn? | 如果Charlie还活着 那骨灰罐里的是谁? |
| [21:46] | Oh.That’s Billy. | 是Billy啊 |
| [21:48] | Who’s Billy? | Billy是谁? |
| [21:50] | The bisexual goat who gave his life that your son might live. | 就是那头为了救你儿子 贡献出生命的双性恋山羊啊 |
| [21:55] | So…so, what are we supposed to do now? | 那我们现在该怎么办? |
| [21:57] | Wait a second. | 等等 |
| [21:59] | Are we really not gonna talk about the fact that Charlie was having sex with a goat? | 我们就真的不讨论一下 Charlie跟山羊滚床单的事了吗? |
| [22:05] | Well, you didn’t know Charlie.It would have been weirder if he hadn’t. | 你不了解Charlie 他要是不跟它滚床单那才奇怪呢 |
| [22:08] | Well, now that you’re all caught up, I’ll say my good-byes. | 现在你们都知道这事儿了 那我就告辞了 |
| [22:12] | – You’re leaving? – Um, yeah. | – 你要走了? – 对啊 |
| [22:15] | I’m not gonna stick around to find out what he’s going to do to me | 我才不会因为太爱他所以留在这儿 |
| [22:17] | just because I loved him too much. | 研究他打算怎么报复我 |
| [22:19] | Toodles. | 回见 |
| [22:25] | Nah.That’s just stupid. | 那样也太蠢了 |
| [22:31] | No…no, no, no, no, this is ridiculous.He’s not gonna hurt anybody. | 不不不 这太荒唐 他不会报复谁的 |
| [22:35] | Oh, of course not. | 当然不会啦 |
| [22:37] | Rose, wait up. | Rose 等等我 |
| [22:40] | What, you’re…you’re leaving, too? | 什么 你…你也要走了? |
| [22:41] | Alan, your brother wasn’t very pleasant if he missed his morning coffee. | Alan 你哥哥就算错过了早晨的咖啡 都会感觉不爽 |
| [22:44] | How do you think he’s going to be after four years in a pit? | 你觉得他在一个坑井里呆了四年 会怎么样? |
| [22:48] | So you’re just gonna bail? | 那你就打算这么逃跑了? |
| [22:50] | Uh…yep. | 对啊 |
| [22:53] | Berta, good-bye. | Berta 再见 |
| [22:55] | I never really cared for you. | 其实我从没怎么在乎过你 |
| [22:59] | Right back at you, Red. | 我也一样 红发妞 |
| [23:02] | Walden… | |
| [23:04] | I loved you like a son. | 我像爱亲生儿子一样爱你 |
| [23:07] | Alan… | |
| [23:10] | good luck. | 自求多福吧 |
| [23:16] | – Well, I-I guess we should go, too.- Hold on. | – 我…我觉得我们也应该赶紧走 – 等等 |
| [23:19] | We’re not really gonna run ’cause of some crazy woman’s story | 我们不能因为一个疯婆子的几句话 和几条含糊不清短信威胁 |
| [23:22] | and some vague text threats. | 就逃到别的地方去 |
| [23:30] | – Okay, this one’s a little more specific. – What does it say? | – 好吧 这条说的就具体多了 – 说什么了? |
| [23:34] | “You despicable troll.” | “你是个卑鄙的巨魔” |
| [23:37] | You thought you could replace my ninja awesomeness, “you lame clown?” | 你以为你能取代我忍者的魅力吗?” 你这个蹩脚的小丑 |
| [23:40] | I will deploy my army of assassins to destroy you. | 我会派出我的杀手战队摧毁你 |
| [23:46] | “I will bring my bayonets of truth “to the hexagon of death, | 我会带上我真理的刺刀 前往死亡的六角星 |
| [23:51] | “where I will carve my initials into your reptilian skull | 在那里我会将我名字的缩写 刻在你卑劣的头骨上 |
| [23:56] | and cover you in tiger’s blood.” | 让你被老虎的血所覆盖 (Charlie Sheen常年自称自己有老虎血) |
| [24:04] | Hard to believe he wrote children’s songs, isn’t it? | 很难想象他能写出儿童歌曲吧? |
| [24:07] | Yeah, we’re gonna need some help. | 我们得去寻求帮助 |
| [24:09] | – Yeah, we’re gonna need a lot of help. – Here, try these. | – 我们需要得力有效的帮助 – 来 试试这个 |
| [24:13] | They won’t keep him from hurting you, | 这虽然不能让他不伤害你们 |
| [24:15] | but they will keep you from feeling it. | 但至少会让你们感觉不到伤害 |
| [24:21] | Uh, thank you for meeting with us on such short notice, Lieutenant. | 感谢你能在那么短的时间里见我们 警督 |
| [24:25] | Anything for you, my friend.How can I help? | 乐意为你们效劳 伙计们 有什么我能帮上忙的? |
| [24:36] | – So,uh,that’s about it, uh,uh,Lieutenant… – Wagner. | – 事情就是这样 警督 |
| [24:40] | – Uh, Wagner. – No, not Wagner; Wagner. | – 不是Wagner 是Wagner |
| [24:43] | Uh, W-A-G-N-E-R.Wagner. | |
| [24:48] | “Vhatever.” | “随便吧” |
| [24:52] | All right, now, let me see if I got this straight. | 好了 现在听听我理解的对不对 |
| [24:55] | 12 years ago, your wife kicked you out, | 12年前 你老婆把你赶了出来 |
| [24:59] | and then you and your dumb son moved in with your brother. | 然后你和你的傻儿子就搬去了你哥哥家 |
| [25:04] | Uh, uh, he wasn’t dumb at the beginning. | 他其实一开始不傻 |
| [25:06] | Uh, he got dumb later on. | 他是后来慢慢变傻的 |
| [25:09] | What happened? | 发生了什么事? |
| [25:10] | Uh, well, turned out it was funnier. | 那样更好笑呗 |
| [25:13] | All right. | 好吧 |
| [25:14] | So your brother then let you stay there eight and a half years rent-free | 之后你哥哥就让你在那儿 免费蹭住了八年半 |
| [25:18] | even though you claim that he never liked you. | 即使这样你还说他从来没喜欢过你 |
| [25:21] | Ah, you’re not the only one to point out the illogic. | 你已经不是第一个觉得这不合逻辑的了 |
| [25:24] | And this brother of yours supposedly died in Paris | 而你这个哥哥据说在巴黎 |
| [25:28] | under mysterious circumstances. | 神秘死亡 |
| [25:31] | It wasn’t all that mysterious.I mean, | 其实没那么神秘 |
| [25:32] | he was taking a lot of drugs and pissed off almost everybody. | 他总是滥用毒品 把身边的人都惹火过 (依旧隐射Charlie Sheen..) |
| [25:37] | And then you tried to drown yourself, | 你企图跳海自杀 |
| [25:40] | but you changed your mind because the water was too cold. | 但因为海水太冷了所以改了主意 |
| [25:46] | And then you got into his house and offered to buy it. | 然后你去了他家 出钱买下了那房子 |
| [25:49] | It seemed like a good idea at the time. | 那个时候觉得这主意挺好的 |
| [25:53] | And then you let him and his son stay there for four more years. | 你后来就让他和他儿子在那里又住了四年 |
| [25:58] | – Right.- Rent-free. | – 对 – 免费蹭住 |
| [26:01] | Well, when you say it like that, it sounds ridiculous. | 你这样说听起来是挺荒谬的 |
| [26:05] | And then your dead brother’s previously unknown lesbian daughter shows up, | 后来你死去哥哥没人知道的 同性恋女儿出现了 |
| [26:09] | and then you let her move in. | 你们就让她也搬了进来 |
| [26:11] | You can’t write this stuff, huh? | 这种故事鬼才编的出来 对吧? |
| [26:15] | And then the two of you got married to each other. | 之后你们两个就结婚了 |
| [26:19] | Yes. | 对 |
| [26:22] | – But you’re not gay. – Well, I’m not. | – 不过你们俩都不是同性恋 – 至少我不是 |
| [26:26] | And then you adopted a black child. | 然后你们收养了一个黑人小孩 |
| [26:28] | Ah, ah, he’s, uh…he’s more Eurasian.Uh… | 他…其实是欧亚混血 |
| [26:33] | Oh, what a sweetie pie. | 真是个小可爱 |
| [26:38] | And the two of you are now divorced? | 现在你们俩离婚了? |
| [26:40] | But you’re living together. | 但你们还是住在一起 |
| [26:42] | If I leave, the whole thing falls apart. | 我要是走了的话 一切都会分崩离析的 |
| [26:46] | Yeah, of course.Uh, | 可不是嘛 |
| [26:48] | and now the woman who stalked your brother and then married him | 如今那个过去跟踪你哥哥 并跟他结婚的女人突然出现了 |
| [26:52] | all of a sudden shows up and she says that he’s not dead after all, | 她告诉你们你哥哥根本就没死 |
| [26:55] | that she has been keeping him in a dungeon pit in the San Fernando Valley. | 她一直把他关在圣费尔南多谷的 一个坑井地牢里 |
| [26:59] | Ah, uh, Sherman Oaks. | 是谢尔曼奥克斯 |
| [27:01] | Uh, but the good part– uh, south of the boulevard. | 但是地段优越 大道以南 |
| [27:05] | And then he escaped, and he sent you cigars and whiskey. | 之后他逃了出来 给你寄了雪茄和威士忌 |
| [27:08] | Oh, and don’t forget the chasin’ knife. | 别忘了还有追着他满屋跑的刀 |
| [27:10] | Oh, and the threatening text.He said, uh, | 还发了威胁短信 他说 |
| [27:12] | “I’m coming home, and you’re gonna pay.” | “我要回来了 而你要为此付出代价” |
| [27:15] | I’m confused.’Cause you said he doesn’t pay for anything. | 我被弄糊涂了 你不是说他什么都不带付的 |
| [27:22] | I think the point is, is that we need you to find him becau… | 我觉得问题的关键是 我们需要您找到他 因为… |
| [27:25] | This guy has some serious rage issues. | 这家伙有严重的暴怒症 |
| [27:28] | Has he tried anger management? | 他有试过愤怒管理吗? (愤怒管理是Charlie Sheen出走的新剧名) |
| [27:31] | Yeah, but it didn’t work. | 有 但没什么效果 (然后影射那个新剧不咋地- -) |
| [27:36] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [27:38] | Well, I have this inscription now, | 我已经做好笔录了 |
| [27:41] | and so if we find him, I’ll let you know. | 如果我们找到了他 我们会通知你们的 |
| [27:45] | – Uh, well…Thank you. – Uh, really appreciate it. | – 那…谢谢你 – 真的十分感谢 |
| [27:47] | No problem. | 没什么 |
| [27:49] | – Now, if I can, uh, offer you a word of advice…- Mm-hmm? | – 如果可以的话 我想给你们一个忠告? – 什么? |
| [27:53] | I would consider wrapping this whole thing up. | 我要是你们我会考虑来个了断 |
| [27:55] | Uh, what do you mean? | 什么意思? |
| [27:57] | I mean the whole living arrangement. | 我是说结束这故事 |
| [27:59] | The kids, the girls, the beach house. | 那些孩子们 姑娘们 还有那栋海边别墅 |
| [28:01] | I mean, this whole thing has been going on way too long. | 这整个故事已经拖得太久太久了 |
| [28:06] | Yeah, a lot of people been saying that. | 很多人都那么说 |
| [28:09] | Haters gonna hate. | 有些人看什么都不喜欢 |
| [28:16] | We should get out of town for a couple of days.You know, | 我们应该出城一段日子 |
| [28:18] | go to a nice resort, uh, get some facials, Mani-pedis. | 去个漂亮的度假村 做做美容 修修指甲 |
| [28:21] | You know, a guys’ weekend. | 男人的休闲 你懂的 |
| [28:23] | No…we’re not going anywhere. | 不…我们哪儿都不去 |
| [28:25] | We got a state-of-the-art security system. | 我们可是装了最先进安全系统的 |
| [28:27] | Nobody gets in unless we let them in. | 除非我们让他进 否则没人能进来 |
| [28:36] | What the hell? | 这是什么鬼? |
| [28:39] | “We got a state-of-the-art security system. | “我们可是装了最先进安全系统的 |
| [28:41] | – No one gets in unless we let them in.” – Shut up. | – 除非我们让他进 否则没人能进来” – 闭上你的嘴 |
| [28:43] | – No, you shut up. – Hey. | – 不 你闭嘴 – 你们好 |
| [28:53] | – Jake? – Oh, my God.Oh, my God!Oh, my God! | – 我的天 我的天呐! |
| [28:58] | Hey!What are you doing here? | 你怎么来了? |
| [29:00] | Yeah, I thought you were in the Army. | 我还以为你参军了呢 |
| [29:01] | Come on.Look at me.Do I look like someone who’s in the Army? | 得了吧 你好好看看我 我看起来像是参军的样子吗? |
| [29:05] | Not on our side. | 可以不是美国兵嘛 |
| [29:08] | Come in. | 快进来 |
| [29:11] | Hey.These are pretty cool.Where’d you get them?Target? | 这东西很酷呀 你们从哪儿买的? 塔吉特? (塔吉特的商标就是个靶) |
| [29:15] | You get it?’Cause of the…there’s the circles… | 你懂不? 因为这些…这些圆圈… |
| [29:18] | Yeah, no, no, I got it.I got it. | 别 我懂 我懂 |
| [29:19] | No.Here’s the thing. | 是这样的 |
| [29:20] | – It turns out that your Uncle Charlie might still be alive. – Oh. | 你叔叔Charlie可能还活着 |
| [29:25] | That would explain why I got a check for $250,000 | 怪不得我收到了一张25万的支票 |
| [29:28] | and a note that said, “I’m alive.” | 还有一张便笺写着”我还活着” |
| [29:32] | You have $250,000? | 你收到了25万美元? |
| [29:34] | Not anymore.I stopped in in Vegas on the way here. | 现在没了 我来的路上去了趟维加斯 |
| [29:37] | Oh, God.How much do you have left? | 我的天 你现在还剩多少钱? |
| [29:39] | Two and a half million. | 250万 |
| [29:44] | You won $2.5 million? | 你赢了250万? |
| [29:47] | Oh, yeah.It’s not that hard. | 对啊 也不是很难赢 |
| [29:48] | I kept playing craps because, you know, “crap.” | 我一直玩双骰子 因为你懂的 “屎”嘛 |
| [29:53] | Oh, and I kept betting on come, because… | 然后我一直赌”来” 因为… |
| [29:58] | Wow.That’s…amazing that you made so much money with such stupid jokes. | 真是…太神奇了 你居然凭那么烂的笑话赢了那么多钱 |
| [30:11] | Taterhead! | 大傻蛋! |
| [30:14] | Hey, Berta. | 嘿 Berta |
| [30:16] | Oh, look at you!You look like a grown man. | 瞧瞧你! 你现在看起来像个大人了 |
| [30:19] | Really?Which one? | 是吗? 像哪个? (最早两个半就是两个大人一个小孩嘛) |
| [30:22] | I’ve missed you. | 我好想你 |
| [30:23] | – Berta, what are you still doing here? – No idea. | – Berta 你怎么还在这儿? – 我也不知道啊 |
| [30:28] | By the way, you’re out of pot. | 顺便说一下 你的大麻抽完了 |
| [30:32] | Where’d these things come from?Target? | 这东西是从哪儿买的? 塔吉特? |
| [30:35] | Ah.Too late.I already did that joke. | 太晚了 我已经讲过这个笑话了 |
| [30:37] | No, somebody left them here.You didn’t hear anything? | 不是 有人把它们摆在这儿了 你没听到什么动静吗? |
| [30:40] | I heard colors. | 我还听得到颜色呢 |
| [30:42] | No, I-I am telling you, Charlie is planning on killing us all. | 我就跟你们说 Charlie打算把我们都杀了 |
| [30:46] | Okay.It was good to see you guys. | 好吧 很高兴见到你们 |
| [30:48] | Wait, Th-that’s it?You’re leaving? | 等等 就这样? 你这就打算走了? |
| [30:50] | Oh, nothing personal– I just got to get back to Japan | 不是针对你 我只是要回日本去了 |
| [30:52] | and tell my wife and kids that we’re rich. | 告诉我老婆孩子我们发财啦 |
| [30:54] | You’re…you’re married? | 你…你结婚了? |
| [30:56] | – Yeah.Didn’t I mention that? – No. | – 对啊 我没说起过吗? – 没有 |
| [30:58] | Wh-Wh-Wh-Whoa.You have kids? | 你都有孩子了? |
| [31:00] | Well, they’re hers.She’s a dancer. | 那是她的孩子 她是个跳舞的 |
| [31:03] | Uh, let me guess– a pole dancer? | 我猜…是个钢管舞娘吧? |
| [31:05] | No, she’s Japanese. | 不是 她是个日本人 |
| [31:14] | Well, see you. | 好吧 回见 |
| [31:19] | All right, all right, we-we got to close these shades. | 好吧 我们应该把窗帘都拉下来 |
| [31:21] | – Anybody on the beach will have a clear shot at us. – Right. | – 任何在海滩上的人都能准确地瞄准我们 – 没错 |
| [31:25] | Do this… | 这样… |
| [31:29] | Man, it sucks to be you guys. | 我去 你们俩死定了 |
| [31:38] | – Hello? – Judith, it’s me. | – 你好? – Judith 是我 |
| [31:40] | Oh, hey, Alan.Isn’t it wonderful about Jake? | 你好 Alan Jake现在是不是很棒啊? |
| [31:43] | – Uh, yeah, wonderful.Listen… – Did he give you $100,000, too? | – 嗯 好极了 听着… – 他有没有也给你10万块啊? |
| [31:46] | – He gave you $100,000? – No.What do you want? | – 他给了你10万块? – 没 你想要怎么样? |
| [31:50] | Uh, uh, okay, long story short– it turns out my brother is alive | 好吧 长话短说 事实上我哥哥还活着 |
| [31:54] | – and he’s out for revenge. – Revenge?For what? | – 而且他现在要来找我报仇 – 报仇? 为什么? |
| [31:57] | Well, he didn’t think I could go on without him. | 他觉得离了他我就活不下去了 |
| [31:59] | He thought I was more of a supporting character in his life, | 他以为我是他人生的配角 (之前就算报艾美 Alan报名的也是配角) |
| [32:02] | but it turns out I-I was sort of a co-lead. | 但事实证明 我算是联合主演呐 (Charlie出走后Alan才拿了最佳男主角) |
| [32:04] | Um, a-anyway, I just wanted you to know that if anything were to happen to me, | 总之 我就想告诉你 如果我出了什么意外的话 |
| [32:10] | you were the love of my life. | 你是我此生挚爱 |
| [32:12] | Oh, Alan, that is so sweet.Hang on, honey.I’m getting another call. | Alan 这太暖心了 等等 亲爱的 有电话进来 |
| [32:25] | She’s not coming back. | 她不会再回来了 |
| [32:31] | Hello? | 你好? |
| [32:33] | Bridget, hi.It’s Walden. | Bridget 我是Walden |
| [32:36] | Hey, Walden.What’s up? | 嘿 Walden 什么事? |
| [32:37] | I can’t go into detail, but I just… | 我不能跟你细说 但我… |
| [32:40] | I wanted to say that I wish I’d been a better husband. | 我就想告诉你 我真希望我当初能做个好老公 |
| [32:44] | Well, thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [32:47] | And I just want to say that… | 我就想告诉你… |
| [32:49] | I’m having sex with John Stamos. | 我在跟John Stamos滚床单 |
| [32:54] | I’m not lying. | 我可没撒谎噢 |
| [32:56] | Go for Stamos. | 我是Stamos |
| [32:59] | Stamos, you’re just a handsome guy who got lucky on a sitcom. | Stamos 你不过就是一个 演过情景喜剧的帅哥而已 |
| [33:03] | Listen, um, I’m just gonna set the phone down | 听着 我现在把电话放下 |
| [33:06] | so you can listen to me shish-kebab your old lady, okay?Bye-bye. | 这样你就能听到 我跟你前妻滚床单的声音了 掰掰 |
| [33:13] | Hold on, fellas. | 等一下 各位 |
| [33:16] | Hello. | 你好 |
| [33:17] | – Uh, Kandi, it’s Alan. – Oh, hi, Alan! | – Kandi 我是Alan – 你好呀 Alan! |
| [33:20] | I just wanted you to know that, | 我就想告诉你 |
| [33:22] | even though we were only married for a short time, | 虽然我们俩的婚姻维持了没多久 |
| [33:25] | you were the love of my life. | 你是我此生挚爱 |
| [33:27] | Oh, how sweet. | 真是太温情了 |
| [33:29] | And you were the first guy I had tushy sex with. | 你也是第一个跟我肛交的人 |
| [33:32] | You guys didn’t hear that. | 你们可没听见我这句话哦 |
| [33:36] | Hello. | 喂 |
| [33:38] | Zoey.Hi.It’s Walden. | Zoey 我是Walden |
| [33:41] | Oh, Walden.How are you, darling? | Walden 你好吗亲爱的? |
| [33:46] | Uh, not so good.Uh… | 不是很好… |
| [33:48] | that’s why I’m calling.I… | 所以我给你打电话 我… |
| [33:50] | I just wanted to tell you that.. | 我就是想告诉你… |
| [33:52] | I’ve been thinking about you lately, and… | 我最近一直在想你… |
| [33:55] | I’m sorry about the way things ended. | 我很抱歉我们俩分手闹得不太愉快 |
| [33:57] | Oh, well…water under the bridge. | 算了…逝者如斯夫 |
| [34:00] | Listen, I’d love to chat, but I’m in the middle of a coronation. | 听着 我很想跟你聊聊 但是我现在正在加冕仪式中 |
| [34:08] | – Of a what? – A coronation. | – 什么? – 加冕仪式 |
| [34:10] | I married King Rupert of Moldavia, and I’m being crowned queen, so… | 我嫁给了摩尔多瓦的国王 我现在正在被加冕为皇后 所以… |
| [34:16] | You’re the queen of Moldavia? | 你现在是摩尔多瓦的皇后? |
| [34:19] | What can I say?Thank you, JDate. | 我能说什么呢? 感谢约会网站咯 |
| [34:22] | Shalom. | 回聊 |
| [34:26] | Darling, you still breathing? | 亲爱的 你还活着吗? |
| [34:30] | Hello? | 喂? |
| [34:31] | – Lyndsey, it’s Alan. – Hi, Alan. | – Lyndsey 我是Alan – 嘿 Alan |
| [34:34] | I was just showing off the beautiful engagement ring you gave me. | 我刚刚还在炫耀 你给我的那枚闪耀的订婚戒指呢 |
| [34:39] | Great.Listen,I just wanted you to know that if anything were to happen to me, | 太好了 听着 我就想告诉你 如果我出了什么意外的话 |
| [34:44] | you were the love of my life. | 你是我此生挚爱 |
| [34:47] | Oh, baby.You’re the love of my life. | 亲爱的 你也是我此生挚爱 |
| [34:50] | So, how much? | 怎么样 值多少钱? |
| [34:55] | Okay, I will say it one more time. | 好 我再说一遍 |
| [34:57] | Resort hotel till the cops find him.We can be in Vegas in two hours. | 在警察抓到他之前我们就躲在假日酒店里 我们两个小时就能杀到维加斯呢 |
| [35:01] | Styx is playing Mandalay Bay. | Styx正在曼德勒海湾表演呢 (70年代摇滚乐队) |
| [35:03] | No, if I let Charlie drive me out of this house, | 不 要是我让Charlie把我从这家里撵走 |
| [35:06] | – I reward his bad behavior. – Yeah. | 我就是在鼓励他这种坏习惯 |
| [35:09] | That’s only supposed to happen in show business. | 这种事不应该只在演艺圈才有的嘛 |
| [35:11] | – Which we are not in. – Not anymore. | – 我们就不是演艺圈的人 – 不会是了 |
| [35:19] | – Oh.Hello? – Valden? | – 你好? |
| [35:21] | – Walden. – That’s what I said. | – 是Walden – 我不就是那么叫的嘛 |
| [35:25] | Look, I have good news.We found your boy. | 我有个好消息 我们找到那个人了 |
| [35:28] | – They found Charlie.- Are-are they sure? | – 他们找到Charlie了 – 他们确定吗? |
| [35:30] | Uh, uh, are…are you sure it’s him? | 你…你确实是他吗? |
| [35:32] | Well, he matches the description. | 他符合你们的描述 |
| [35:34] | Bowling shirt, cargo shorts, and he’s babbling away incoherently. | 保龄球衫 短裤 嘴里语无伦次 |
| [35:39] | That sounds like him.Wh-Where’d you find him? | 那听起来就是他了 你们在哪儿找到他的? |
| [35:41] | In a trashed hotel room with a hooker in the closet. | 在一个垃圾酒店房间里 衣柜里还有个妓女 (还是影射Charlie Sheen…) |
| [35:45] | That’s absolutely him. | 那绝对是他 |
| [35:47] | Oh, my…Thank you so much.This is a huge relief. | 太感激你了 这样真是松了口气 |
| [35:49] | Oh, you’re welcome.Uh, see you in the gym. | 不客气 健身房见吧 |
| [35:52] | Okay.Hasta la vista. | 好的 再见啦 |
| [35:55] | I’m telling you, I’m not Charlie Harper. | 我告诉过你了 我不是Charlie Harper |
| [35:58] | – Then who are you? – My name is Christian Slater. | – 那你是谁? – 我叫Christian Slater |
| [36:01] | I’m an actor, all right? | 我是个演员好吗? |
| [36:03] | I was in a bar, and this guy hands me a drink. | 我当时在酒吧里 有个人给了我杯喝的 |
| [36:05] | Next thing I know, I wake up in a hotel room dressed like a 12-year-old, | 等我恢复意识时 我在酒店房间里 穿得像个12岁的孩子 |
| [36:08] | with a screaming woman in the closet. | 还有个女人在衣橱里大叫 |
| [36:11] | Yeah, right.And I’m the governor of California. | 可不是嘛 我还是加州州长呢 (阿诺施瓦辛格真的做过加州州长) |
| [36:15] | That bitch stole my watch. | 那贱人还偷了我的手表呐 |
| [36:30] | What do you think Charlie will do when he gets out of jail? | 你觉得等Charlie从监狱里 放出来了他会干嘛? |
| [36:32] | Well, if the past is any indication, | 如果借鉴以前的经历的话 |
| [36:36] | he’ll sober up and reflect on his past mistakes, | 他会戒酒 反省自己过去的错 |
| [36:39] | apologize to everyone,and then do something even worse. | 向每个人道歉 然后干点更离谱的事 |
| [36:44] | See, I’m not so pessimistic. | 我没那么悲观 |
| [36:46] | I’m hoping someday he and I can be buddies. | 我一直希望有一天 他和我会成为小伙伴 |
| [36:55] | Good one. | 说得好 |
| [36:58] | By the way, when this cigar is done, so am I. | 另外 等我抽完这支雪茄 我也完事了 |
| [37:02] | – Yeah, you calling it a day? – Calling it a career. | – 你要下班了吗? – 我不干了 |
| [37:05] | You’re quitting? | 你要辞职? |
| [37:06] | I didn’t want to rub your nose in it, | 我本不想提起这事儿的 |
| [37:08] | but Charlie sent me a big-ass check, so I’m out of here. | 但是Charlie给我寄了一张大额支票 所以我要离开这儿了 |
| [37:12] | – Where you gonna go? – Don’t know. | – 那你要去哪儿? – 不知道 |
| [37:14] | Somewhere the sun is bright, the pot is strong and the men are stupid. | 去阳光灿烂 大麻够劲儿 男人够蠢的地方 |
| [37:20] | That’s here. | 那不就是这儿嘛 |
| [37:23] | You’re right. | 你说得对 |
| [37:25] | I’m staying. | 我不走了 |
| [37:31] | Wow.Look at that. | 你们看那儿 |
| [37:36] | Someone’s having a piano delivered by helicopter. | 有人在用直升机运钢琴 |
| [37:40] | Mmm.That’s the kind of extravagant thing Charlie would do. | 这有点像Charlie奢侈的风格 |
| [37:43] | Oh, uh, he had a baby grand just like that. | 而且他有台跟这个一样的钢琴 |
| [37:46] | It’s coming right this way. | 他就朝着我们这里飞过来了 |
| [37:49] | You don’t think that it’s possible that the cops got the wrong guy, do you? | 你们有没有想过警察可能抓错人了? |
| [37:56] | – Nah. | – Nah. – 切 – 不可能 |
| [38:20] | Winning. | 赢的人是我 (Chuck Lorre 哎呀小气 先骂人的还是你) |