| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:06] | Ma’am, American University is a fine institution. | 女士 美国大学是个好大学 |
| [00:08] | American University sounds like a made-up college in Egypt. | 美国大学听起来像个在埃及的野鸡大学 |
| [00:12] | Okay? I don’t want my library there. | 我不想让我的图书馆建在那 |
| [00:14] | Well, technically, it wouldn’t even be a library. | 好吧 理论上说 那不能叫做图书馆 |
| [00:16] | – What? – It won’t be a library, ma’am. | – 什么? – 女士 那不是个图书馆 |
| [00:19] | No, I heard her. You understand that, Amy, | 不 我听到她说的了 艾米 |
| [00:21] | that even Richard has trouble understanding you? | 你看看连理查德都听不明白你说的话了? |
| [00:23] | You would be donating all of your papers, gifts, | 你需要把你所有的文件 礼物 |
| [00:25] | and ephemera to them, to their library. | 还有小东西都给他们 给他们的图书馆 |
| [00:28] | Well, of course the dresses. I think… | 好吧 当然还有衣服 我想… |
| [00:29] | No, they don’t want the dresses! | 不 他们不想要衣服! |
| [00:30] | You know that every president since FDR | 罗斯福之后的每一个美国总统 |
| [00:34] | has had a goddamn library, okay? | 都有个图书馆 好么? |
| [00:36] | Even that sanctimonious fraud Carter had a library. | 就连那个伪善的骗子卡特都有 |
| [00:39] | American University, it’s like American Univer-shit. | 美国大学 听起来像美国大屎 |
| [00:49] | Thank you. Thank you! | 谢谢 谢谢! |
| [00:50] | I just wanna say that I am so proud to be here | 我想说 我很高兴能来到这里 |
| [00:53] | – as a part of… – National Volunteer Week. | – 作为… – 国际志愿者周 |
| [00:55] | …National Volunteer Week. | 国际志愿者周的一分子 |
| [00:57] | Yeah, really important. | 是的 真的很重要 |
| [01:00] | Okay, thanks. | 好了 谢谢 |
| [01:03] | Super. Great! | 太棒了! |
| [01:06] | How about that? How about that? | 怎么样? 怎么样? |
| [01:09] | I also do wallpaper. | 我除了刷墙也卖壁纸哟 |
| [01:12] | Thank you guys so much. It’s been so much fun. | 非常感谢你们 真的很有趣 |
| [01:15] | I love this T-shirt, too. | 我也很喜欢这件T恤 |
| [01:16] | It’s just so happy and wonderful! | 太开心太棒啦 |
| [01:19] | Bye-bye! Thank you! Thank you. | 再见 谢谢 谢谢 |
| [01:22] | Get this T-shirt off of me. | 我得脱掉这玩意 |
| [01:24] | I look like I’m trying out for “The Price is Right.” | 我看起来就像在参选《价格猜猜看》 |
| [01:27] | God Almighty, I wish I’d | 我的神啊 我希望 |
| [01:28] | – been assassinated in office. – No, don’t say that! | – 我在办公室被暗杀 – 别 别这么说! |
| [01:30] | Although, with my luck, I’d be then crippled for life, | 但是 我非常幸运的没死 只是变成了瘸子 |
| [01:32] | sitting in a wheelchair | 一辈子都要坐在轮椅上 |
| [01:34] | in my reading room with my name on the thing. | 在我的阅览室里读着写着我名字的东西 |
| [01:37] | They haven’t agreed to putting your name on anything, ma’am. | 女士 他们还没同意以你的名字命名什么 |
| [01:38] | – What? – They said they haven’t agreed | – 什么? – 他们说 他们还没同意 |
| [01:40] | to putting your name on anything, ma’am. | 把以你的名字命名什么 女士 |
| [01:45] | That food was just disgusting. Why did we even go there? | 那些食物太恶心了 我们为什么要去那儿? |
| [01:48] | Do you want me to get you anything else? | 要不要我拿点什么别的给你? |
| [01:49] | You didn’t eat anything. | 你什么都没吃 |
| [01:51] | Oh, God, I hate every food ever, | 我的天 我讨厌各种食物 |
| [01:54] | from everywhere. | 哪儿的都讨厌 |
| [01:55] | – Have you tried ice cream? – Ugh. | – 你尝冰淇淋了吗? – 恶心 |
| [01:57] | You know what, I was gonna wait until afternoon tea, | 我打算等到下午茶的 |
| [01:59] | but I have got a fun surprise for ya. | 但是我等不及给你一个有趣的惊喜了 |
| [02:02] | They have unveiled your wax figure at Madame Tussauds! | 你的蜡像在杜莎夫人蜡像馆揭幕了！ |
| [02:06] | – Oh, is that the fun part? – Check that out. | – 这就是有趣的地方? – 看看吧 |
| [02:09] | What?! They have me next to Gerald Ford? | 什么?! 他们把我放在杰拉尔德·福特旁边了?（第38任总统任期也不长） |
| [02:12] | Is this the Hall of Half-Term Wonders? | 怎么 这房间的名字叫”只当了半个任期的总统展示厅”吗? |
| [02:15] | I thought that was Craig T. Nelson. | 我觉得那个好像是格雷格·T·尼尔森（美国演员 编剧 制片 导演） |
| [02:16] | God, can nothing go right for me, ever?! | 神啊 为什么倒霉的事都让我碰上了?! |
| [02:19] | What can I do? What can I do? I will fix it. | 我能做点什么? 我能做点什么? 我来弥补一下 |
| [02:21] | Why do they even have a wax figure of Ford? | 他们为什么要给福特做个蜡像? |
| [02:24] | – I don’t know. – The real one was made of wood. | – 我不知道 – 真人明明是个木头 |
| [02:26] | Get them to move me next to– to Lincoln or to Mao | 让他们把我挪走 挪到林肯或者毛泽东旁边 |
| [02:30] | – or some other game-changing icon! – Aw, yes. | – 或者一些扭转乾坤的大人物旁边! – 好的 |
| [02:33] | That’s what I am. Don’t make that noise! | 这才是我 别弄些怪声音! |
| [02:35] | Just do it before I melt down that whole collection | 在我把整个杜莎夫人蜡像馆里的蜡像 |
| [02:39] | and use it to wax | 全都融了 |
| [02:40] | Madame Tussauds’ big, fat, nasty snatch! | 给杜莎夫人做个私处脱毛之前赶紧把我挪走! |
| [02:45] | Oh, God, no. | 我的天 不 |
| [02:47] | My pantyhose go up so high. | 我的裤袜太往上了 |
| [02:49] | Ma’am, it’s normal | 女士 心脏病发作后 |
| [02:51] | to experience a temporary depression after a heart attack. | 暂时抑郁是正常现象 |
| [02:55] | I went through it with my father. | 我爸爸也这样 |
| [02:57] | He was unbearable. | 他老闹腾了 |
| [02:58] | Trust me, Amy, it was not the heart attack | 相信我 艾米 |
| [03:01] | that depressed your dad. | 你爸爸抑郁并不是因为心脏病发 |
| [03:03] | And anyway, I’m not depressed. | 不管怎么样 我没抑郁 |
| [03:05] | I just feel like I’m a thick, dark fog | 我就是觉得我像雾霾一样 |
| [03:08] | and everyone disappoints me and nothing works out, | 每个人都对我很失望 而且什么都没用 |
| [03:10] | and what’s the point of anything anyway? | 生活的中心在哪里呢? |
| [03:12] | And before you ask, | 你问之前我得先说 |
| [03:14] | it’s not because I’m not sleeping, okay? | 这并不是起床气 好吗? |
| [03:16] | ‘Cause I’m getting 14 hours of sleep a night. | 我昨天晚上睡了14个小时 |
| [03:18] | Hey, ma’am, if you ever wanna talk to a therapist, | 女士 如果你想接受心理治疗 |
| [03:20] | I got a great gal. | 我倒是有个好人选 |
| [03:21] | Wendy and I went to see her when things were rocky. | 当我们的关系有点破裂的时候 我和温蒂去见了她 |
| [03:23] | Both of them went to town on me. It was brutal. | 温蒂和那个心理医生大骂了我一顿 有点残酷 |
| [03:25] | I cried so hard, I threw up, | 我大哭一场 我吐了 |
| [03:26] | but it was the best thing I’ve ever done. | 但是这是我做过的最好的事情 |
| [03:27] | Okay, look at me, Mike, all right? | 好了 看着我 迈克 |
| [03:30] | Not crazy, okay? | 我没疯(疼) |
| [03:33] | – You know, Mom… – What? | – 你知道 妈妈 – 怎么了? |
| [03:35] | …therapists can help with all kinds of problems | 心理治疗师可以帮助你解决各种 |
| [03:36] | that aren’t necessarily mental illness. | 不一定是精神问题的疾病 |
| [03:38] | I mean, my woman is amazing. | 我是说 我的治疗师就很棒 |
| [03:40] | You’re in therapy? Since when? | 你在接受心理治疗? 什么时候开始的? |
| [03:43] | Since I was 13. | 我13岁那年 |
| [03:45] | Well, what you really needed was a dermatologist. | 好吧 你真正需要的是个皮肤科医生 |
| [03:47] | Ma’am, have you done any more thinking | 女士 你有没有再考虑一下 |
| [03:49] | about Catherine and me | 我跟凯瑟琳在 |
| [03:50] | moving into Mee-Maw’s after the baby is born? | 生下孩子之后搬去您奶奶的小屋的事情啊? |
| [03:51] | Okay, Marjorie, that’s, like, 14 things | 好吧 马乔里 其实 有14件事 |
| [03:54] | that I can’t, you know… | 我(懒得想)… |
| [03:55] | – So… – You know, Dr. Diane thinks | – 所以… – 你知道 戴安娜医生 |
| [03:57] | that it would be really great if you could come in, | 如果知道你会参加我们的疗程的话 她会很高兴的 |
| [03:59] | that it could really open up and facilitate | 这会真正的促进 |
| [04:01] | good communication between the two of us. | 我们之间的良好沟通 |
| [04:02] | Okay, well, Dr. Diane is an asshole, okay? | 好吧 戴安娜医生就是狗屁 |
| [04:05] | I’ll tell you what else, I’m not gonna carry that. | 我跟你说 老娘不要拿这个 |
| [04:08] | I’m not carrying that either. | 也不要拿这个 |
| [04:09] | Oh, Richard, can Catherine and I speak with you for a moment? | 理查德 我和凯瑟琳能跟你谈谈么? |
| [04:11] | Well, you’re the boss. | 好啊 你们是老板 |
| [04:13] | Richard, are there any hereditary issues that run in your family? | 理查德 你的家族里有没有什么遗传的疾病? |
| [04:16] | Well, my father and I both hate eating butterscotch, | 嗯 我和我爸爸都讨厌吃奶油糖果 |
| [04:18] | but love to say it. | 但是喜欢说这个词 |
| [04:20] | Butterscotch. | 奶油糖果 |
| [04:21] | Sorry, why do you ask? | 抱歉 你为什么这么问? |
| [04:25] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [04:30] | Oh, fuck! | 卧槽 |
| [04:31] | “Wethinks Danny Boy Toy doth protest too much. | 《我们认为小丹尼总是在抗议》 |
| [04:34] | ‘Himbo’ Egan Dan-ies affair with NewsMILF, McCabe.” | 《”奶油小生”丹尼与新闻界熟女麦克凯布的风流韵事》 |
| [04:38] | All right, you know what? Fuck that. | 好吧 卧槽 去他妈的 |
| [04:40] | Hey, this isn’t a library! | 嗨 这不是图书馆 |
| [04:42] | Oh, no, it’s a graveyard that sells gum. | 不 你这是个卖口香糖的墓地 |
| [04:44] | – Print is dead. – You wanna buy some gum? | – 纸媒已死 – 你想买点口香糖吗? |
| [04:45] | No, I get all my gum on Amazon. | 不 我都在亚马逊上买 |
| [04:47] | But if the check is for the Rare Bird Conservancy, | 如果这笔钱是为了珍稀鸟类的保护 |
| [04:50] | then why does it have to go through the Andrew H. Meyer Trust? | 为什么要经过走安德鲁·H·梅耶的信托基金? |
| [04:53] | That’s a good catch, little Cat. | 你直击要害啊 小宝贝儿 |
| [04:54] | Um, you know what? | 不如这样 |
| [04:56] | Just for tax purposes, | 就单从报税的目的考虑 |
| [04:57] | why don’t you make it out to cash? | 你要不就写现金如何? |
| [04:59] | That’s easy, hmm? | 这不就简单多了? |
| [05:02] | I’ll just leave it blank. | 我还是留着空白吧 |
| [05:04] | It’s not your drop-by day. | 今天可不是你探亲的日子 |
| [05:05] | I couldn’t wait another moment | 我可一刻都等不及 |
| [05:06] | to see my two favorite daughters. | 要见我最爱的两个女儿了 |
| [05:08] | – What? – Where did little Madge disappear to, anyway? | – 什么鬼? – 小马乔怎么消失不见了? |
| [05:10] | You asked her to wait by your street meter in case it ran out. | 是你让她在街上停车处等着 防止超过停车时间 |
| [05:13] | Right. Darn. | 对哦 操蛋 |
| [05:15] | Morning, ma’am. Hey, we really need to | 早啊 女士 我们真得 |
| [05:17] | I will wait in the living room. | 我还是在客厅等着吧 |
| [05:19] | You’re not giving any money | 你没准备把一分钱撒给 |
| [05:21] | to the Music Man here, are you, sweetie? | 这个音乐人吧 亲爱的? |
| [05:23] | Have you no shame? | 你一点羞耻心都没有吗? |
| [05:25] | – And, Mom. – What? | – 还有 老妈 – 咋地? |
| [05:26] | Here is your monthly allowance | 这是你的每月津贴 |
| [05:28] | And what chores do you do around the house to deserve that? | 你究竟是做了什么家务何德何能能拿那份补贴? |
| [05:31] | I show assholes the door. | 我把混蛋扫地出门 |
| [05:32] | Well, regardless, | 不管怎么说 |
| [05:34] | I bid you both adieu. | 向你俩道声再见哈 |
| [05:35] | – Flattering skirt. – Shut up. | – 这裙子真撩人 – 闭嘴吧你 |
| [05:37] | Hey, Mike, sorry. I gotta get running. | 嘿 迈克 不好意思 我得先跑路了 |
| [05:39] | But your investment is doing well. | 但你的投资运作态势喜人 |
| [05:40] | I’ve never gotten a statement. | 我都没听你说过 |
| [05:42] | Here’s a statement your investment is doing quite well. | 我这不说了嘛 你的投资运作态势喜人 |
| [05:45] | – Can you believe the nerve of him? – No, I can’t. | – 你能相信他没犯病? – 还真不能 |
| [05:49] | Ma’am, actually, I gotta talk to you. | 女士 事实上 我们得好好谈谈了 |
| [05:51] | I got another call from the publisher. | 出版社又给我打了通电话 |
| [05:52] | We need to buckle down and start writing the book, okay? | 我们得倾全力开始重新认真写书了 |
| [05:55] | What if we started with when Hughes selected you as his veep? | 要不我们就从休斯选你为副总统那时写起吧? |
| [05:58] | I mean, the lies. | 谎话连篇 |
| [06:00] | The flagrant self-interest! | 明目张胆 自私自利! |
| [06:02] | Do you have any memory of that moment? | 您还记得那一刻吗? |
| [06:04] | Any details, any specifics? | 任何细节 越细越好? |
| [06:05] | You know, during my first win for Congress, | 我跟你说 在我第一次赢得国会议员的整个竞选期间 |
| [06:07] | he was cheating on me during the entire campaign | 他都在出轨 |
| [06:10] | and said it was my fault. | 还口口声声说是我的错 |
| [06:12] | – I didn’t know that. Okay. – Yeah, absolutely he did. | – 这我就不知道了 – 他绝对干过这事 |
| [06:14] | Andrew said that he was | 安德鲁竟然说 |
| [06:17] | campaigning long hours at the office for me. | 他为我呆了老长时间的竞选办公室 |
| [06:20] | But what was he doing? | 但你知道他在做什么鬼吗? |
| [06:21] | He was fucking Louise Kellog for me, | 他操了露易丝·肯罗格 |
| [06:24] | my goddamn press secretary. | 她可他妈是我的新闻秘书 |
| [06:25] | ‘Cause that’s what he does, see? | 他就干得出这种人神共愤的事 看到了吧? |
| [06:27] | – He makes you – Who was your opponent in that race? | – 他让你 – 你竞选时的对手是谁? |
| [06:29] | Uh, I don’t know. Some old white guy. They’re all the same. | 我不记得了 又老又白的死男人呗 都一个德行 |
| [06:31] | And it was a really tight race. | 竞选真的是千钧一发 |
| [06:33] | Everybody said I was gonna lose, | 所有人都说我要输了 |
| [06:35] | and people were saying I was cold | 他们都说我全程冷漠脸 |
| [06:37] | and that I was unrelatable. | 还说我一点都不亲民 |
| [06:38] | Down, down. | 一路滑行到人生低谷 |
| [06:40] | Whatever happened to Louise Kellog? | 那露易丝·肯罗格后来如何? |
| [06:42] | Oh, God, I made Andrew can her slutty can. | 天 我让安德鲁炒了她这个贱人 |
| [06:45] | And then we just hired the | 然后就雇了 |
| [06:47] | least fuckable press secretary we could find. | 我们能找到的最不适合他操的新闻秘书 |
| [06:49] | Huh, that’s actually right when I started working with you. | 好像就是那时候我开始为您工作的 |
| [06:52] | Hey, get up. | 起来 |
| [06:54] | – What? – Give me that fork. | – 啥? – 把那叉子给我 |
| [06:55] | – What? What? What gives? – Up, up. | – 啥? 啥? 给你啥? – 起来 起来 |
| [06:56] | Fundraising laws- no silverware. | 募捐惯例 绝对不用银器 |
| [06:58] | Yeah, if you sit, it’s a meal, | 如果你坐下 这就成了一顿饭 |
| [07:00] | which is a gift, which is a bribe, | 而募捐晚会应该是礼物 是贿赂 |
| [07:02] | which is a line of prison inmates | 也就是一群罪犯 |
| [07:04] | standing on each other’s shoulders trying to sodomize you. | 肩并肩 人头攒动 想要爆你菊花 |
| [07:06] | Well, my feet hurt and I’m really hungry. | 我的脚老疼了 我都快饿死了 |
| [07:09] | Well, that’s why we told | 所以我们不是 |
| [07:10] | you to eat a big meal before you got here! | 让你来之前先饱餐一顿的嘛! |
| [07:12] | Well, I wasn’t hungry then! And I need to go to the bathroom. | 我那个时候肚子又不饿! 我得去卫生间了 |
| [07:14] | – You just went. – Hey, here he is, the Macher of the Moment. | – 你刚刚不是去过了吗 – 他在这呢 这一切的中心 |
| [07:18] | – Mr. Tanz. – Jonah, I want you to meet my wife, Lia, | – 泰兹先生 – 乔纳 给你引见一下我的妻子 莉娅 |
| [07:20] | and daughter, Shawnee. | 还有我的女儿肖妮 |
| [07:22] | Yeah, what’d I tell ya? He’s tall, huh? | 告诉过你他很高吧? |
| [07:24] | Hi, Mrs. Tanz. Ms. Tanz, you are smoking. | 你们好 泰兹夫人 泰兹小姐 你真是太火辣了 |
| [07:28] | I’m the daughter. Gross. | 我是他女儿啦 真恶心 |
| [07:29] | – We have a six-year-old. – Oh, mazel tov. | – 我们有一个六岁的宝宝 – 恭喜啊 |
| [07:32] | Listen, I have a thought– I wanna make sure | 听着 我有个想法 我想确保 |
| [07:33] | that when you talk about Daylight Savings Time, | 当你谈论夏令时的时候 |
| [07:35] | you don’t forget to talk about crime. | 别忘了提一提犯罪 |
| [07:37] | It’ll get dark earlier all year long, | 今年全年天黑得特别早 |
| [07:39] | which means more burglaries | 这意味着入室盗窃 谋杀还有强奸犯罪增多 |
| [07:41] | and murders and rape through the roof. | 甚至可能会超越往年 |
| [07:42] | – Wait, isn’t that bad? – Wait, | – 等下 这不是不好吗? – 别急 |
| [07:44] | wait, you didn’t let me get to the best part. | 别急 我还没说到重点上呢 |
| [07:45] | More crime means more for-profit prisons. | 更多的犯罪就意味着我的监狱有更多利润啦 |
| [07:48] | We’re gonna lock ’em up and we’re gonna fry ’em. | 我们把罪犯们都给关起来 全部杀光 |
| [07:50] | What are you, a monster? | 你这人是魔鬼吗? |
| [07:52] | If you kill them, they can’t get arrested again. | 如果你把他们杀了 你就不能再逮捕他们了 |
| [07:54] | – That’s how we make our money. – Processing fees. | – 钱就是这么赚的 – 各种手续费 |
| [07:57] | Right, which you would know | 对的 如果你没在跟肉丸作斗争差点没牺牲的话 |
| [07:58] | if you hadn’t been losing a battle of wits with a meatball. | 你就能知道这道理了 |
| [08:01] | Great candidate, Dad. | 您这竞选人真棒 老爸 |
| [08:03] | Impressive. | 简直令人惊艳 |
| [08:04] | I can see why you married the other one. | 我可以理解为什么您娶了另一位了 |
| [08:06] | That’s my Shawnee. | 这就是我的肖妮啊 |
| [08:08] | – Moe. – You better go and fix this, okay? | – 摩 – 你最好赶紧去把这破事给弄好? |
| [08:10] | And go do it fast before | 并且还得赶在 |
| [08:11] | Kent invites her to a Sudoku weekend in Vermont. | 肯特邀请她去佛蒙特州做数独度周末之前弄好 |
| [08:14] | – I don’t like that. – Just go. | – 我不想这么做 – 赶紧去做 |
| [08:16] | Uh, excuse me, Shawnee. | 打扰一下 肖妮 |
| [08:19] | I don’t know what your problem is, | 我倒是不知道你有啥毛病 |
| [08:21] | but I’ve been underestimated my entire life. | 但是我整个人生都被别人低估 |
| [08:24] | Failure to thrive at birth– fuck that. | 什么出生后活不下来啦 操他妈的吧 |
| [08:26] | Puberty at 19. When it hit, it hit like a fucking thunderbolt. | 什么19岁才发育啦 但我告诉你 本少爷发育的时候 简直如晴天霹雳 |
| [08:30] | Third grade reading level in the tenth grade. | 什么高一的时候阅读水平还停留在三年级啦 |
| [08:32] | Everything that I have been through in my entire life | 我整个人生中所经历的一切的一切 |
| [08:34] | has only made me stronger and taller. | 都让我更加雄壮 更加高大 |
| [08:37] | Get those fucking meatballs away from me. | 把那些操蛋的肉丸从我的眼前拿开 |
| [08:42] | Ma’am, can you believe the sun is up? | 女士 您能相信都已经天亮了吗? |
| [08:44] | Oh, look at this. | 快看这个 |
| [08:45] | There’s my horse, Chicklet. | 这是我的那匹马 囡囡 |
| [08:47] | I begged Daddy to get her for me, and he did. | 我苦求我爸买下送给我 然后他就买给我了 |
| [08:51] | I remember he said, “Squirrel, you’re an intense little girl, | 我记得他说 “小松鼠 你一直是一个紧张兮兮的小姑娘 |
| [08:55] | and now you finally have a friend.” | 现在你有朋友啦” |
| [08:59] | – Aw, he called you “Squirrel.” – Mother up and sold her. | – 他竟然叫你松鼠 – 妈妈不喜欢 所以就把马卖了 |
| [09:02] | She hated all animals that she couldn’t eat or wear. | 她痛恨所有她不能吃也不能穿的动物 |
| [09:05] | Anyway, eventually, | 不管怎么说 最终 |
| [09:08] | Daddy changed that stable into his office. | 老爸把那块马厩改成了他的办公室 |
| [09:11] | So, how did he die? | 那他是怎么死的? |
| [09:14] | Heart attack. | 心脏病发 |
| [09:15] | Like father, like daughter. | 有其父 必有其女 |
| [09:16] | Boy, I’ll tell you, I remember that night he died | 我跟你说 我还记得他去世那晚 |
| [09:19] | ’cause his secretary came banging on the door at, like, 2:00 AM. | 因为他的秘书在凌晨两点的时候跑过来狂敲门 |
| [09:24] | We don’t have to talk about this stuff | 如果你不想说这些事情的话 |
| [09:26] | – if you don’t want to. – No, it’s okay. | – 我们可以不聊的 – 不 没事的 |
| [09:28] | I like talking about it, even with you. | 我挺喜欢聊这事的 即使是跟你聊也没所谓 |
| [09:30] | Hmm, see? I’m not so bad once you get to know me after 20 years. | 看到没? 在认识我二十年后了解了我 发现我也没这么坏吧 |
| [09:34] | Yeah, exactly. | 是啊 是这样 |
| [09:36] | In 10 years, we’ll be taking vacations together. | 再过十年我们可以一起去度假了 |
| [09:39] | Go on! | 继续说! |
| [09:40] | – I’d go to Sandals. – I hope the book’s done by then. | – 我一定要穿凉鞋 – 我希望那时候书写完了 |
| [09:43] | Well, the book better be done in 10 years | 这书最好在十年内写完 |
| [09:45] | or I’ll be broke as a… | 否则我会破产的… |
| [09:48] | What’s going on here? | 这是在干嘛? |
| [09:50] | You guys having a party– party by the fire? | 你们在开派对吗? 围着壁炉开派对? |
| [09:52] | – Yes! – Oh, can I join? | – 是啊! – 我能加入吗? |
| [09:55] | Sure! | 当然! |
| [09:56] | We’re so glad you’re here. | 你在这真是太好了 |
| [09:58] | – I need breakfast. – Okay. | – 我需要早饭 – 好吧 |
| [10:01] | – Oh, can you help me up? – Sure. | – 能拉我起来吗? – 当然 |
| [10:02] | Here, okay. I’ll– I’ll get you from the back. | 好 我从背后帮你一把 |
| [10:04] | – Get off of me! – Right. | – 把手拿开! – 好吧 |
| [10:06] | So, what do you want for breakfast, Mike? | 所以你早饭想吃什么 迈克? |
| [10:07] | I usually have an eight-egg white omelet. | 我通常是吃八个蛋白做的煎蛋卷 |
| [10:09] | – And do you have sausage patties? – What is this, Yonkers? | – 你有没有肉饼? – 那算什么早餐啊? 我们又不是在杨克斯? |
| [10:12] | – Just go and get sausage patties. – Right, sure. | – 赶紧去弄点肉饼别废话 – 好的 好的 |
| [10:15] | – Do you wanna see my yearbook? – Yeah! | – 你想不想看我的年鉴? – 好啊! |
| [10:17] | – Oh, yeah. – High school years. | – 太好了 – 高中时代啊 |
| [10:18] | Yeah, yeah, yeah. | 没错没错 |
| [10:20] | – Are you guys, like, besties now? – I don’t know. | – 你们两个现在是 闺中密友了? – 我不知道 |
| [10:22] | She hasn’t yelled at me in, like, 24 hours. | 她已经有大概 二十四个钟头没吼我了 |
| [10:24] | – It’s weird. – It is weird. | – 真奇怪 – 是很奇怪 |
| [10:26] | Hey, did you get me out of the Gerry Ford ghetto? | 你帮我摆脱格里·福特那个死穷酸了吗? |
| [10:28] | I did. You’re bowing next to President Lu. | 是的是的 你现在在卢总统边上鞠着躬呢 |
| [10:31] | – Good. – Can I see? | – 太好了 – 我能看看吗? |
| [10:32] | Yeah, sure, sure. | 当然 当然 |
| [10:33] | – Morning! – Morning. | – 早上好! – 早上好 |
| [10:35] | You guys had a slumber party. | 你们俩开了个睡衣派对 |
| [10:37] | Yeah! So, listen, we’re about to get breakfast | 是的! 听着 我们准备吃点早饭 |
| [10:39] | – and Gary’s gonna go… – Look at this. | – 盖瑞准备去… – 看这个 |
| [10:42] | – …and get something called sausage patties. – Oh, my God! | – …弄点肉饼回来 – 我的天哪! |
| [10:45] | Look at the guy. He’s like… | 看这人 他好像是… |
| [10:46] | We still don’t eat meat, Mom, and we’re on our way out. | 我们不吃肉 妈妈 我们准备出去了 |
| [10:47] | – In your pajamas? – It’s athleisure-wear, ma’am. | – 穿着睡衣? – 这是运动休闲款 女士 |
| [10:50] | – Okay, that’s not a word, Marjorie. – That’s disgusting! | – 这根本不是个词，马乔里 – 太恶心了! |
| [10:52] | – Close it. – All right, well, | – 关上 – 好吧 |
| [10:54] | I don’t even know why I try with those two honestly | 说实话 我都不知道我为什么要试着和这俩人说话 |
| [10:57] | Hey, ma’am, | 女士 |
| [10:58] | before we get back to work, would you mind writing | 在我们会去工作之前 你介不介意给 |
| [11:00] | a letter of recommendation to the Harper Day School? | 哈珀走读学校写封推荐信? |
| [11:02] | We’re just trying to get Ellen in there, and it’d be really good. | 我们想让艾伦去那上学 要是她能被录取就好了 |
| [11:04] | – Wait, who? – My oldest daughter. | – 等下 谁? – 我大女儿 |
| [11:06] | – Oh, that Chinese one? – Sure. | – 那个中国的? – 是的 |
| [11:08] | You write it, I’ll sign it. | 你写好 我签字 |
| [11:10] | – Really? – Sure! | – 真的吗? – 当然! |
| [11:11] | Thank you so much, ma’am. Thank you. | 太谢谢你了 女士 谢谢 |
| [11:12] | – Look at this. – Oh, my gosh. | – 看这个 – 我的天呐 |
| [11:15] | – Did you ever go through an awkward phase? – No! | – 你这么美 一定没有任何丑照吧? – 没有! |
| [11:18] | Wow, I can’t believe I’m gonna be a father! | 不敢相信我要做父亲了! |
| [11:20] | A lot of responsibility. | 太多责任了 |
| [11:21] | You just signed away all responsibility. | 你刚刚的签字已经把所有责任都推掉了 |
| [11:24] | I’ve never done this before. | 我从来没做过这个 |
| [11:25] | You just go in the room and… | 你就走进去然后… |
| [11:27] | Uh, I’ve never shook the devil’s hand. | 我从来没有 握过魔鬼的手 |
| [11:31] | You mean masturbate? | 你是说 手淫? |
| [11:33] | Oh, self-husband. | 是啊 没自己解决过 |
| [11:35] | – Does it hurt? – Oh, no, Richard. | – 会疼吗? – 不会的 理查德 |
| [11:37] | – It doesn’t hurt. Wait, really? – No, but how is that possible? | – 不会疼的 你说的是真的吗? – 不会的 怎么可能? |
| [11:39] | Well, my family in Iowa was pretty religious. | 我爱荷华州的父母还是很虔诚的 |
| [11:41] | Grandma Splett always said that self-pleasure was a sin | 史培雷奶奶一直说自慰是一种罪恶 |
| [11:42] | like microwaves or laughter. | 就像微波炉和笑声一样 |
| [11:44] | Do you need a minute or…? | 你需要缓缓吗 还是…? |
| [11:45] | No. Worse comes to worst, I’ll burn in hell like Grandma Splett. | 不用 再糟糕也不过就是跟史培雷奶奶一样在地狱被烧死 |
| [11:48] | You know what? He has a really good heart. | 你知道吗? 他真的心地很善良 |
| [11:51] | I’m sorry, I’m still understanding how the cup comes into play. | 不好意思 我还不是很清楚这杯子是干什么用的 |
| [11:54] | Oh, you– you just have to aim | 你就只要 瞄准 |
| [11:57] | and– and what– | 然后 就… |
| [11:58] | How many of these do I need to fill up? | 我得弄满多少杯? |
| [12:00] | Yeah, no, you just have to do one. | 只要一杯就可以了 |
| [12:01] | Just one? Okay. I think that’ll be easier. | 就一个? 好的 那还是蛮简单的 |
| [12:03] | How will I know when I’m done? | 我怎么知道我搞定了? |
| [12:05] | You know, I’ll figure it out. I’ll probably figure it out. | 没事了没事了 我去自己想清楚好了 可能也许大概吧 |
| [12:10] | Jonah. | 乔纳 |
| [12:14] | So, that really happened, huh? | 这一切真的发生了 是吧? |
| [12:17] | Why didn’t you take me back to your place? | 你为什么不带我去你那? |
| [12:19] | Do you live with your mom? | 你和你妈住吗? |
| [12:20] | No. Pfft, no. She wishes. | 不是的 美的她 |
| [12:22] | I live in my office. DC rents are insane, | 我住在办公室里 华府房子的租金太贵了 |
| [12:24] | and Ben and Kent say I can’t use campaign money. | 本和肯特说我不能用竞选的钱租房 |
| [12:26] | – Can I use campaign money? – No, you can’t use campaign money. | – 我能用竞选的钱吗? – 不 你不能用竞选的钱 |
| [12:29] | Okay. Second opinion. | 好吧 我就当你是补充意见了 |
| [12:30] | I chose your outfit for the day, | 我帮你挑好了今天要穿的衣服 |
| [12:32] | but I’m donating the rest of your suits | 但是我准备把你其他的衣服都捐 |
| [12:34] | to a charity for rescued circus giraffes. | 给拯救马戏团里长颈鹿的慈善机构了 |
| [12:37] | I’m pretty sure I can take care of dressing myself. | 我感觉我还是可以处理好我的穿着问题的 |
| [12:39] | – Can you? – Hey, um, do you have time to… | – 你能吗? – 你有没有时间… |
| [12:41] | – No. – Okay. | – 没有 – 好吧 |
| [12:43] | It’s just you look really good in my robe, | 只是你穿着我睡袍特别好看 |
| [12:44] | and I thought if you had some time, | 我想如果你有时间的话 |
| [12:45] | maybe I could finger you or something? | 我想说我可以给你做个手活或者干点什么的? |
| [12:48] | No, I have to get going. | 我得走了 |
| [12:50] | – Okay. – We’ll fuck again tonight at 7:30 | – 好吧 – 我们今天晚上七点半继续干 |
| [12:53] | with less kissing. | 但是少亲点嘴 |
| [12:54] | Okay. Yeah, no, 7:30 works. | 好 没问题 七点半可以 |
| [12:55] | – I’m taking a Pop-Tart. – Can I ask you a question? | – 我带走这水果塔了 – 我能问你个问题吗? |
| [12:58] | – What? – Just– this is the first time | – 什么? – 只是 这是第一次 |
| [13:00] | that that’s happened since the treatment, since the cancer, | 在我的癌症治疗之后发生这种事情 |
| [13:03] | – and I– – Oh, my God, get to it. What? | – 我… – 我的天哪 有屁快放 怎么了? |
| [13:04] | Did my missing ball freak you out? | 我没有蛋蛋这件事情吓到你了吗? |
| [13:06] | Honestly, it was one less thing to worry about. | 说实话 你没有蛋蛋我还少了件担忧的事情 |
| [13:08] | Okay. Thanks, Mrs. Tanz. | 好的 谢谢 泰兹女士 |
| [13:10] | – What? – Ms. Tanz. | – 啥? – 泰兹小姐 |
| [13:19] | Hey, Richard. Five-minute feud truce. | 理查德 停战五分钟 |
| [13:21] | The most amazing thing just happened to me twice! | 最难以置信的事情刚刚发生了 还发生了两次! |
| [13:24] | Really? Something amazing just happened to me, too! | 真的吗? 我这也发生了超棒的事情! |
| [13:27] | – Amy? – What do you want? | – 艾米? – 有事吗? |
| [13:28] | Okay, I had the president’s wax figure | 我把总统的蜡像挪到了 |
| [13:30] | relocated next to President Lu. | 卢总统边上 |
| [13:33] | And what’s wrong? | 然后怎么了? |
| [13:35] | They have her bowing. | 她们把她做成鞠躬的样子了 |
| [13:37] | Like this. | 像这样 |
| [13:39] | I know what bowing is. | 我知道鞠躬是什么 |
| [13:41] | People are… | 人们在… |
| [13:44] | What? What? | 怎么? 怎么了? |
| [13:47] | You know, like, taking advantage of her. | 你知道的 占她便宜 |
| [13:49] | They’re fucking her in the ass? | 他们从后面上她? |
| [13:50] | I have to see this. | 我得看看 |
| [14:00] | This girl is, like, 11 years old. Where are her parents? | 这个女孩 大概就十一岁 她父母在哪? |
| [14:05] | Ugh. Obviously, you need me to fix this? | 呃 当然了 你想让我处理好这事? |
| [14:06] | I tried, but it’s just– | 我试了 但… |
| [14:08] | You’re as useless as a dick at a roller derby. | 你比轮滑赛里的鸡巴还没用 |
| [14:10] | And then there was this one time | 还有一次 |
| [14:11] | that Daddy got back from a month in Cuba. – | 我爸在古巴待了一个月后回来了 |
| [14:14] | – Cuba? – Hey, green tea with a hint of rosemary. | – 古巴? – 绿茶加一丝迷迭香 |
| [14:16] | Okay, we’re right in the middle of working. | 我们正在工作唉 |
| [14:18] | Gary, can I get a Sprite? | 盖瑞 我能要个雪碧吗? |
| [14:19] | Yeah, get him a Sprite. | 给他瓶雪碧 |
| [14:21] | Anyway, so Daddy never came home empty-handed. | 总之 爸爸从不空手回家 |
| [14:23] | I have the most amazing snow globe collection. | 我有最棒的雪景球收集 |
| [14:26] | – No. Really? – I haven’t even shown you that yet. | – 不可能 真的? – 我还没给你看过 |
| [14:28] | – Yeah, you’re gonna die. Yeah. – The board is ready for you. | – 你会惊呆的 – 董事会在等您了 |
| [14:30] | – Oh, the– right. – Oh, | – 哦 对了 – 哦 |
| [14:31] | I bet you got a great snow globe from Cuba. | 我敢说你有一个很棒的古巴雪景球 |
| [14:34] | Oh, no. Actually, he brought me back an ashtray from Cuba. | 哦 没 其实他从古巴给我带了个烟灰缸回来 |
| [14:39] | Good morning. Selina Meyer present. | 早上好 赛琳娜·梅耶在线了 |
| [14:42] | We will now vote on the next item. | 我们现在为下一项事宜进行投票 |
| [14:43] | I’m on the board of Biogenzidine. | 我是生物基因制药公司的董事 |
| [14:45] | – What are you voting on? – These vultures wanna raise the price | – 你们在投什么票? – 这些没良心的秃鹫想给一个 |
| [14:48] | – of some new cancer drug. – Ugh. | – 新的癌症治疗药提价 – 恶心 |
| [14:50] | Aye. | 同意 |
| [14:51] | Please re– | 请重… |
| [14:52] | So, your dad was away a lot. | 所以你的父亲总是出远门 |
| [14:54] | Yeah, and he was away with his secretary when he died, | 是啊 他死的时候和他的秘书在出差 |
| [14:58] | – so I didn’t get a chance to say good-bye to him. – Mm-hmm. | – 所以我没能有机会和他说再见 – 嗯 |
| [15:01] | No, his secretary wasn’t with him. | 不 他的秘书没跟他在一起 |
| [15:02] | She was the one pounding on the door the night he died, remember? | 她是在他死的那晚去你家砸门的 记得吗? |
| [15:05] | – No, I– – Ma’am? | – 不 我… – 女士? |
| [15:06] | – Vote number two is up. – Oh. | – 第二项提议开始了 – 哦 |
| [15:09] | – What is it? – Animal testing. | – 是什么? – 动物实验 |
| [15:11] | Aye. | 同意 |
| [15:13] | – Ma’am, a lot of this stuff | – 女士 这事 |
| [15:14] | seems kind of weird, doesn’t it? | 好像有点蹊跷 不是吗? |
| [15:16] | Weird? What are you getting at? | 奇怪? 你听说什么了? |
| [15:18] | Nothing. I’m– like, some of these details about your dad | 没什么 我… 比如 你父亲生前故事的一些细节 |
| [15:22] | – are a little irregular, like the Cuba trips… – No. | – 有点不太对劲 比如说古巴之行… – 不 |
| [15:25] | – What? – …all the cash. | – 什么? – …还有那么多现金 |
| [15:26] | Hey, what is your game here? | 停停停 你想说什么? |
| [15:28] | Because my daddy was a very good family man, okay? | 我父亲是个很顾家的男人 知道吗? |
| [15:33] | He was charismatic, he was gregarious, | 他有魅力 又合群 |
| [15:36] | he was somewhat peculiar, yeah… | 他是有点奇怪 是的… |
| [15:38] | – – …but all interesting people are, okay?! | …但有趣的人都这样 好不好唉?! |
| [15:41] | So, put that in your stupid book! | 把这都写进你的破书里啊! |
| [15:42] | – Thank you. – No, we’re not gonna have any Sprite. | – 谢谢 – 别给他 我们不提供任何雪碧 |
| [15:44] | This isn’t a movie theater. | 这又不是电影院 |
| [15:48] | I wonder if it’d be worth checking in on Uncle George. | 我想要不要查一下乔治叔叔 |
| [15:51] | We’re not gonna talk to Uncle George! | 我们才不要和乔治叔叔说话! |
| [15:53] | He’s a bald, old booze-bag with a whiskey-stink mustache, | 他是个秃子还是个带着威士忌渍胡子的老酒鬼 |
| [15:56] | – just like you! – Ma’am? | – 就像你一样! – 女士? |
| [15:58] | – Third vote. – Nay. | – 第三项 – 不同意 |
| [15:59] | But it’s for discounted prescriptions for the elderly. | 但这是给老年人的打折处方药 |
| [16:01] | Oh. Nay. | 哦 不同意 |
| [16:07] | I’ll just sit here. | 我就在这坐着好了 |
| [16:10] | I’m sorry I ruined the good vibe. | 抱歉我毁了气氛 |
| [16:12] | I’m sorry I ruined the good vibe. | 抱歉我毁了气氛略略略略略 |
| [16:13] | I’ve asked you before not to do that impression, ma’am. | 我之前告诉过你不要这样模仿别人 女士 |
| [16:19] | I mean, do I fuck her? The entire town thinks I am anyway. | 我是说 我上了她吗? 反正整个城区都觉得我上过了 |
| [16:21] | You’re my mom’s favorite couple. | 你们是我父母最喜欢的情侣 |
| [16:23] | It would be uncharted territory for me. | 这对我来说是未知领域 |
| [16:24] | Sort of like Indiana Jones, I guess. | 我猜就像印第安纳琼斯一样 |
| [16:26] | Digging my way through the ancient ruins, | 在古老的废墟中挖出一条生路 |
| [16:27] | hacking my way past the crazy cobwebs and snakes and shit, | 在疯狂的蜘蛛网和蛇还有其他东西里闯出条路 |
| [16:30] | hoping my face doesn’t melt when I open her up. | 希望我干她的时候脸不会化掉 |
| [16:32] | I’m sure if I saw it, I would– that would all make sense to me. | 呃 要是我能眼见为实了 没准就… 你说的没准我就能懂了 |
| [16:36] | – Amy. – What are you doing here? | – 艾米 – 你在这干嘛? |
| [16:37] | I said I would call you back. | 我说过会给你打回去的 |
| [16:39] | You also said you’d fix it, Amy. | 你也说过你会处理好的 艾米 |
| [16:40] | They put her on a bench talking to FDR. | 他们把她放在长櫈上摆成和罗斯福说话的姿势了 |
| [16:42] | Zero anal access. How’s that for a new deal? | 零后门通行许可 我处理得怎么样? |
| [16:45] | You know what she’s also doing? | 你知道她还在干什么吗? |
| [16:46] | They have her gesturing like this. | 他们给她这样的手势 |
| [16:49] | And people are resting their… | 然后人们把他们的… |
| [16:51] | Like, their balls? | 他们的蛋蛋? |
| [16:52] | Not just the beans. Also, the franks. | 不只有蛋蛋 还有 屌屌 |
| [16:55] | That’s disgusting. | 真恶心 |
| [16:56] | They will be arrested. | 他们会被抓起来的 |
| [16:58] | Will they? There’s a lot there. | 会吗? 这种人太多了 |
| [17:00] | There’s a lot there. I got a lot of pictures to show you. | 太多了 我有很多照片给你看 |
| [17:02] | I don’t see any arrests. | 我没看到一个人被逮捕 |
| [17:04] | – You see any arrests? – Okay, okay, okay. Jesus. | – 你看到有人被抓了吗? – 好了 好了 好了 天啊 |
| [17:07] | That is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. | 这简直是我看到过最棒的照片了 |
| [17:08] | You know, have sex with Jane McCabe, | 你知道吗 和简·麦克凯布上床 |
| [17:10] | don’t have sex with Jane McCabe, | 不和简·麦克凯布上床 |
| [17:11] | just do whatever it takes to keep your job, | 只要能保住你的工作 随你 |
| [17:14] | because it is, in fact, a job. | 因为这 实际上 只是个工作 |
| [17:16] | Or we could trade places, and you could be in charge | 或者我们可以换换 这样呢 你可以负责给一个 |
| [17:19] | of a library that doesn’t exist | 并不以服务国家闻名 而是以 |
| [17:20] | for a president who is currently more famous | 给整个时代广场的人当飞机杯闻名的总统 |
| [17:23] | for being a jizz sock for Times Square tourists | 管理一个 |
| [17:25] | than for serving her country. | 并不存在的图书馆了 |
| [17:27] | Let’s go, Gary. | 咱们走 盖瑞 |
| [17:29] | Jane McCabe? Wow! | 简·麦克凯布? 天啊 |
| [17:32] | Respect. | 你牛逼 |
| [17:35] | Did I tell you the story | 我说过你爸爸把爱索尔·摩曼(百老汇女星) |
| [17:36] | about how your father made Ethel Merman cry? | 弄哭的那个故事吗? |
| [17:40] | Oh, it’s true, it’s true | 哦 是真的 真的 |
| [17:42] | ’cause he tried to pull her wig off. | 因为他想把她假发摘下来 |
| [17:44] | He didn’t like her Broadway show. | 他不喜欢她的百老汇表演 |
| [17:46] | So, I just wanna clarify some of the details | 所以 我就是想弄清楚一些 |
| [17:48] | about the night that Daddy actually died. | 爸爸去世的那晚的细节 |
| [17:51] | Did Mother have to get the body flown back here? | 妈妈当时是不是让人把爸爸的遗体用飞机运回来的? |
| [17:54] | What? No. Of course not. | 什么? 当然没有 |
| [17:57] | Oh, so, then how– how did his body get back? | 所以 怎么… 他的遗体怎么回来的? |
| [18:00] | From where? He died in the barn. | 从哪回来? 他死在谷仓里 |
| [18:02] | No, he was away on business. | 没有 他在出差 |
| [18:04] | No, that’s just what we told her when she was a little girl. | 不 这只是在她小时候 我们编好骗她的故事 |
| [18:07] | – But you knew that, right? – Mm-hmm. | – 但是你知道的 对吧? – 嗯 |
| [18:08] | Her mother and I didn’t want her to see the body | 他妈妈和我不想让她看见她爸的遗体 |
| [18:10] | and poor Barbara. | 还有可怜的芭芭拉 |
| [18:12] | Barbara Valeski, Daddy’s secretary? | 芭芭·拉莱斯基 爸爸的秘书? |
| [18:14] | Died right on top of her. | 就死在她上面 |
| [18:16] | What a way to go. | 也是个好死法 |
| [18:18] | She was built, my God. | 她身材棒棒哒 我的天啊 |
| [18:21] | Wait, uh, what? | 等等 什么? |
| [18:22] | Yeah, she had to go to the loony bin after that. | 是啊 她后来去了疯人院 |
| [18:25] | Your mother paid for it. She always referred to it as “The spa.” | 你妈妈付的钱 她管那儿叫”疗养中心” |
| [18:28] | – What? – But it wasn’t just Barbara, | – 什么? – 但不止芭芭拉 |
| [18:30] | which is why your mom converted the barn, | 所以你妈妈当时改建了谷仓 |
| [18:32] | so he wouldn’t embarrass her in seedy motels. | 这样他就不会被人抓到偷情 让你妈难堪了 |
| [18:35] | See? That’s why Mother sold my horse. | 看到了吗? 所以我妈就把我的马给卖了 |
| [18:39] | – Okay. – Write that down. | – 好的 – 把这点写下来 |
| [18:40] | What? No, no, no, no. | 什么? 不不不不 |
| [18:41] | Your dad sold it to get the IRS off of his back. | 是你爸爸卖的 为了逃税 |
| [18:45] | – You knew that, right? – Dad– Daddy sold Chicklet? | – 你早就知道? – 我爸爸 爸爸卖掉了囡囡? |
| [18:48] | Your mother wasn’t gonna bail him out anymore. | 你妈妈当时也不想再去保释他了 |
| [18:51] | You know, she had a great head for business. | 你知道的 她有着超棒的生意头脑 |
| [18:53] | Damn fine lady. | 真他妈是个好女人 |
| [18:55] | That’s why you didn’t get a snow globe. No business trip. | 这也是为什么你没拿到雪景球 因为你爸当时没出差 |
| [18:58] | Oh, I haven’t thought of those snow globes in a million years. | 我差点都把那些雪景球给忘了 |
| [19:01] | Yeah, we just were unpacking all of them. | 我们刚刚还在给它们拆包装 |
| [19:03] | Barbara loved buying you those. | 芭芭拉喜欢给你买那些东西 |
| [19:06] | You know, she had no children of her own, | 你知道 她没有自己的孩子 |
| [19:08] | you know, because your dad was always taking her to the doctor. | 因为你爸爸总是带她去看医院(避孕或者打胎) |
| [19:12] | – What a character. – I gotta… I’m gonna get out of here. | – 真是个人渣 – 我… 我要出去 |
| [19:16] | I’m gonna borrow that. | 我要借走那个 |
| [19:17] | Anytime, Madam President. | 常来啊 总统女士 |
| [19:18] | Uncle George sounded pretty sweet on Mee-Maw, huh? | 乔治叔叔说起奶奶真是分外甜蜜啊 是不是? |
| [19:21] | – What? – Never mind. | – 什么? – 没什么 |
| [19:25] | It’s fun to drive again, especially drunk. | 再次开这车真是太爽了 尤其是喝醉的时候 |
| [19:27] | You know that my daddy taught me to drive in this car right here? | 你知道我爸爸就是在这个地方教我开车的吧? |
| [19:30] | – Really? – And once, I hit a deer, | – 真的吗? – 还有一次 我撞了一头鹿 |
| [19:33] | and Daddy took the blame for it. | 我爸当了替罪羊 |
| [19:36] | Careful, the ground isn’t straight here. | 小心点 这边地面不平 |
| [19:41] | Oh, my God. | 我的天哪 |
| [19:43] | Yeah, this is it. | 是的 就是这了 |
| [19:45] | This was Chicklet’s old house. | 囡囡的旧房子 |
| [19:47] | Wow! See this desk? | 看到这桌子了吗? |
| [19:50] | After Daddy died, I would crawl right underneath here and hide. | 爸爸死后 我就爬到这桌子底下 藏起来 |
| [19:54] | You know, ’cause I was so petite and pretty. | 你懂得 因为我特别娇小可爱 |
| [19:57] | And look it here. | 看这 |
| [19:59] | I’d take this picture of me and Daddy. | 我会拿着把我和爸爸的这张照片 |
| [20:02] | I would just stare at it. | 然后一直盯着它看 |
| [20:04] | See? | 瞧? |
| [20:08] | He was a cheater and a liar! | 他就是骗子 谎话连篇! |
| [20:12] | He was a horse thief! | 他是个偷马贼! |
| [20:14] | I was stupid little Daddy’s girl! | 我就是那个恋父的笨女孩! |
| [20:18] | You gotta do this, Mike. Come on. | 你也来 迈克 来 |
| [20:19] | – Okay. – God damn him! | – 好的 – 去你妈的! |
| [20:21] | – Uh, bad desk! – No, come on! | – 该死的桌子! – 不 来啊! |
| [20:25] | You gotta be mad about something! | 你赶紧愤怒起来! |
| [20:28] | Pay me! Pay me, bitch! | 快付我钱! 付钱! 你这贱人! |
| [20:31] | Yeah, you pay him, you bitch! | 对 你快付钱给他 你这个贱人! |
| [20:33] | Pay me, bitch! | 给我付钱 贱人! |
| [20:35] | Wait, stop! | 等等 停! |
| [20:39] | This is a pencil holder | 这是个笔筒 |
| [20:40] | that I made for my daddy when I was at camp. | 是我露营时给爸爸做的 |
| [20:43] | Okay, okay. | 好了 好了 |
| [20:44] | This feels good. | 感觉爽极了 |
| [20:46] | – Why do shoes cost so much money?! – He wasn’t so perfect! | – 为什么鞋这么贵?! – 他也不是那么完美! |
| [20:49] | He loved them and he was fucking them! | 他爱他们 他还上他们! |
| [20:51] | – I wish I had peed first. – Come on! | – 真希望我刚才先上了厕所 – 拜托! |
| [20:54] | – Why do I always wait so long to pee? – Oh, my God. | – 为什么我总是要等这么久才能上厕所? – 我的老天 |
| [20:57] | I’m a grown man! | 我是个成年人了! |
| [21:00] | I shouldn’t eat when I’m full! | 饱了就不能再接着吃了 |
| [21:09] | Ma’am! Ma’am! | 女士! 女士! |
| [21:12] | Move! | 起开! |
| [21:19] | Ma’am. | 女士 |
| [21:21] | Ma’am. | 女士 |
| [21:24] | Oh, God! | 我的老天! |
| [21:27] | – Are you all right? – Sure. | – 你没事吧? – 当然 |
| [21:29] | Easy. Oh. | 放轻松 |
| [21:31] | We did a number on this place. | 我们大闹了一通 |
| [21:33] | Jesus Christ. | 我的老天 |
| [21:35] | My mom was right and I ignored her, | 我妈妈一直是对的 但我完全忽视了她 |
| [21:38] | and I married my fucking father. | 我还一直偏向着我那该死的父亲 |
| [21:41] | We should call the fire department. I smell smoke. | 我们应该叫消防部过来 我闻到了烟味 |
| [21:44] | This is the book. | 这就是你书的题材； |
| [21:45] | This is the story of the gifted girl | 天赋秉异的女孩 |
| [21:48] | who triumphed over her parents’ toxic marriage | 没有受她父母恶劣婚姻的影响 |
| [21:52] | to become an American icon! | 成为了美国标志性人物! |
| [21:54] | Don’t you see? I had no choice but to go into politics | 你明白了吗? 我无路可走 只能投身政界 |
| [21:58] | and be extraordinary and a sex symbol. | 变得卓越非凡 成为女性榜样 |
| [22:01] | And you’re gonna write it! | 你要把这些写下来! |
| [22:10] | Guys, it’s fine. | 伙计们 没事的 |
| [22:12] | Mike crashed my car. | 迈克把我的车撞了 |
| [22:13] | He’s completely wasted. | 他醉的不轻 |
| [22:16] | I made this at camp. | 我在露营时做了这个 |
| [22:19] | Look, I made it at camp. | 看呀 我在露营时做了这个 |
| [22:23] | – Ma’am. – Just leave him. | – 女士 – 别管他了 |
| [22:26] | And finally, an attempt to break the record | 昨天 随着45英寸高的肉饼燃起火焰 |
| [22:28] | for cooking the world’s largest hamburger | 这项为了破纪录 |
| [22:30] | turned into an unhappy meal yesterday | 做出世界最大汉堡的尝试 |
| [22:33] | when the 45-foot-wide patty caught fire. | 以悲剧收场 |
| [22:35] | – Danny, Jane. – That’s Brie Ramachandran with the world news. | – 丹尼 简 – 这就是本期布瑞·拉玛钱德兰为我们带来的世界新闻 |
| [22:39] | Boy, some scary moments there, I bet. | 天哪 我敢说那场面肯定挺吓人的 |
| [22:41] | Frightening. | 恐怖极了 |
| [22:43] | Well, that’s all the time we have. | 今天节目就到这里 |
| [22:45] | We’ll see you in the tomorrow. | 我们明天再见 |
| [22:48] | – Bye, now. – Bye. | – 再见 – 再见 |
| [22:50] | And we are clear. | 录制完毕 |
| [22:51] | – Jane, perfect as always. – Oh, please. | – 一直这么完美 简 – 省省吧 |
| [22:54] | Hey, so, Danny, before I have a morning bagel, | 所以 丹尼 在吃百吉饼当早餐前 |
| [22:56] | I just wanna make sure you don’t wanna fuck that, too. | 我来问问看 你要不要连百吉饼也干一干 |
| [22:58] | – Page six. – “Jane | – 第六页 – “简·麦克凯布 |
| [22:59] | McCabe’s boy toy steps out with beefy blonde.” | 的小白脸跟一个金发女汉子出去了” |
| [23:02] | What the fuck? | 什么鬼? |
| [23:04] | Yeah, I don’t think Jane’s | 我觉得简 |
| [23:04] | gonna like you out with a younger woman. | 看到你一样跟个年轻妹子出去肯定不会开心 |
| [23:07] | That’s Amy Brookheimer, | 那是艾米·布鲁克海默 |
| [23:09] | and she’s way older than Jane. | 她比简要大多了 |
| [23:11] | Hey, Jane, just wanna make sure you’re not mad about this | 嗨 简 我来是想确保下你不会因为这个生气 |
| [23:14] | because we’re not actually fucking, and you know that, right? | 因为我们并没有真的上床 你知道的对吗? |
| [23:18] | Yes, Danny, I know that we’re not actually fucking | 是的 丹尼 我知道我们没有真的上床 |
| [23:20] | because you’re not a billionaire | 因为你又不是什么亿万富翁 |
| [23:22] | and I don’t wanna catch anything. | 而且我也不想染上什么病 |
| [23:23] | Okay, well, then maybe you can call the “Post” | 好吧 那你可以给《华盛顿邮报》报社打个电话 |
| [23:25] | and tell them that these rumors about us are complete bullshit | 告诉他们那些关于我们的谣言都是一派胡言 |
| [23:27] | ’cause this is like Dewey blows Truman here. | 因为这就像杜威给杜鲁门吹箫一样(1984年选举中互为对手) |
| [23:30] | Dan, if I stop being fuckable, then I am Grandma, | 丹 如果我不跟人滚床单了 那我就真的是老女人了 |
| [23:33] | and if I’m Grandma, I will be replaced | 如果变成老女人 我就会被 |
| [23:36] | by two tits with a degree from American University over there. | 那个有美国大学学历的抖着两个大奶子的贱货取代 |
| [23:43] | It’s you. | 是你 |
| [23:44] | You’re the one telling people. | 是你把谣言放出去的 |
| [23:46] | Smart and handsome. | 真是聪明的帅小子 |
| [23:50] | All right, the treasury secretary | 财政部部长 |
| [23:51] | is meeting with House leadership | 在与白宫领导举行会谈 |
| [23:53] | about a hard date for the debt ceiling. | 商讨债务上限的硬性发布日期 |
| [23:55] | Why do we always have to raise the ceiling? | 我们为什么总是要调高债务上限(天花板)? |
| [23:57] | So you don’t scrape your head, you giant barbecue fork. | 调高了之后就蹭不到你的大脑袋了 你这个巨型烧烤傻叉 |
| [24:00] | You need to get rid of your glasses. They make you look smart. | 你需要把眼镜摘掉 戴着它显得太精明了 |
| [24:02] | – Okay. – Voters hate that. | – 好的 – 选民们可不喜欢 |
| [24:04] | Okay, next vote. | 好了 下一个提案 |
| [24:05] | HR 2029, it’s good, old-fashioned pork barrel. | HR 2029 还不错 老规矩 猪肉桶(指议员制定拨款法时将资金拨给自己的选区) |
| [24:08] | Excuse me, don’t say pork. Shawnee’s Jewish. | 嘿 别说猪肉这词好吗 肖妮是犹太人呢 |
| [24:11] | Okay, just refer to your color-coded chart. | 好吧 刚看了下你的五彩绚烂彩色标记的表格 |
| [24:13] | I’ve become close with a woman at Kinko’s | 我最近跟个在金考快印店 |
| [24:15] | who makes educational materials for preschoolers. | 专门给幼儿园做教案的女人走的比较近 |
| [24:17] | Come on, if the other congressmen see me with a cheat sheet, | 港真 如果其他议员看到我这份偷情专用登记表 |
| [24:20] | they’re gonna think I’m a fucking idiot. | 他们只会觉得我他妈就是个白痴 |
| [24:22] | You can’t unring that bell. | 泼出去的水收不回来 |
| [24:23] | Why can’t we just write it on my hand like we used to? | 为什么我们就不能像以前那样让我写手上呢 |
| [24:26] | That worked and I felt good about myself. | 那样老方便了而且也让我感觉自己棒棒哒 |
| [24:28] | – Take your tie off. – What? Like, right now? | – 把你领带解了 – 什么? 就 现在吗? |
| [24:31] | Okay, guys, will you just give us eight to ten minutes or so? | 好吧 伙计们 你们能给我们八到十分钟的时间吗? |
| [24:33] | No, you’re switching to bow ties. | 什么啊 你要换戴领结而已 |
| [24:35] | No, I’m gonna look like that old popcorn homo. | 不 那我成什么了 像个死娘炮同志似的 |
| [24:37] | You’ll look like a school teacher or a small-town grocer– | 你看起来就会像个学校老师或者是个小城的杂货商… |
| [24:40] | good, solid, New England,professions. | 完美 靠谱 新英格兰风(乔纳的选区在美国新英格兰地区) 专业人士 |
| [24:42] | Yeah, or like a nation of Islam badass. | 也有可能像个伊斯兰教的极端分子 |
| [24:45] | Small-town grocers do poll exceptionally well for probity. | 小城杂货商们确实喜欢廉政风格的候选人啊 |
| [24:48] | How do small-town child molesters poll? | 那小城儿童猥亵罪犯喜欢什么样的呢? |
| [24:50] | Oh, and you’re voting against HR 2029. | 噢 对了 你的不许赞成HR2029 |
| [24:53] | Wait, wait, Jesus, lady, | 等等 等等 天啊 女士 |
| [24:55] | we’re talking about 300 jobs here at least. | 我们在这谈的可至少是三百份工作啊 |
| [24:57] | Jobs for wetlands | 是啊 三百份给 |
| [24:58] | duck-fuckers who are never gonna vote for Jonah. | 那些永远不会给乔纳投票的乡巴佬工作 |
| [25:01] | Being against waste will play statewide, | 反对浪费的风气将会盛行整个州 |
| [25:03] | and even nationally. | 甚至是全国 |
| [25:05] | – Okay, vote no. – Vote yes. | – 好了 去吧 记得投反对票 – 投赞成票 |
| [25:08] | If I vote no, can I turn your drylands into wetlands? | 如果我听了你的话 我能把你的干地变成湿地吗？ |
| [25:11] | – Ugh, fine. – Okay, thanks, babe. | – 恶 行吧 – 好的 谢了 宝贝 |
| [25:13] | – Stop it. Clean this shit up. – Jonah: Okay. | – 停下 把桌面清好再说吧 – 好的 |
| [25:15] | Kent, would you mind just cleaning this shit up? | 肯特 谢谢你能帮我把桌子清一清吗 |
| [25:17] | Just straighten it up a little bit for me? Thank you. | 随便理一理就行了 谢啦 |
| [25:19] | Well, the female form is a formidable adversary. | 看来这吹枕边风的姑娘也是个很强劲的对手啊 |
| [25:23] | Well, ironically, I have bigger tits. | 是啊 讽刺的是 她的胸比我还小 |
| [25:26] | Ma’am, that’s the letter | 总统女士 这是给 |
| [25:28] | of recommendation for the Harper Day School. | 哈珀走读学校的推荐信 |
| [25:29] | Yes, indeed, okay. | 好的 是的 知道了 |
| [25:31] | – Ma’am, do you have a second? – Sure. | – 总统女士 你有时间吗? – 有 |
| [25:33] | Catherine, Richard, and I have something important to tell you. | 凯瑟琳 理查德和我有些重要的事情要告诉你 |
| [25:35] | – Okay. – Richard: I think you’re gonna be really surprised. | – 说吧 – 我觉得你会很惊讶的 |
| [25:37] | – Mom, what happened to your forehead? – Oh, it’s nothing. | – 妈 你额头怎么了? – 噢 没什么 |
| [25:40] | Mike and I were at Mee-Maw’s last night | 我和迈克昨晚在奶奶家 |
| [25:41] | and– oh, the stable got wrecked, by the way. | 而且 噢 对了 马厩被人搞坏了 顺便一说 |
| [25:44] | – Catherine: What? – How did the stable get wrecked? | – 什么? – 马厩是怎么坏的? |
| [25:45] | Anyway, you know how I have been searching forever | 别管那了 你们知道我为了给 |
| [25:48] | for the perfect place for my library, | 我的图书馆找最佳地点费了多少心力吗 |
| [25:50] | and all along, it’s been staring at me in my face! | 结果 最近才发现一直以来最佳地址就在我眼前! |
| [25:53] | I’m gonna turn Mee-Maw’s house | 我要把M奶奶的房子改建成 |
| [25:56] | into the Selina Meyer Presidential Birthplace and Library. | 塞琳娜·梅耶总统诞生地和其图书馆 |
| [26:00] | – Just like FDR. – Yes! | – 就像罗斯福总统 – 没错! |
| [26:02] | But wasn’t Mee-Maw living in Palm Beach when you were born? | 但你奶奶在你出生的时候不是在棕榈滩吗? |
| [26:05] | Catherine, I don’t know! I was a baby. | 凯瑟琳 我也不知道! 当时我还是个宝宝 |
| [26:07] | Okay, well, you know Marjorie and I were planning on moving down there. | 好吧 马乔里和我打算搬过去 |
| [26:10] | I mean, we were gonna have our family there. | 我是说 我们要在那里抚养孩子 |
| [26:11] | Well, Catherine, is there any parade that you cannot rain on? | 我说 凯瑟琳 你能不要什么事都掺和一脚? |
| [26:14] | Ma’am, I just got off with Sherman Tanz. | 总统女士 我刚跟舍曼·泰兹联系过 |
| [26:16] | – Oh, and? – He is all in for the Birthplace and Library. | – 是吗 然后呢? – 他非常赞成您的想法 |
| [26:19] | – Ooh, I am so excited that he’s excited. – Amy: Yes. | – 太好了 他赞成 – 对啊 |
| [26:23] | Well, he is asking one favor, though. | 不过 他有个小小的请求 |
| [26:25] | Oh, of course he is. | 噢 他要是没有就怪了 |
| [26:26] | What does Rumpleforeskin want? | 那个小恶魔想要什么? |
| [26:28] | Apparently, he is having trouble | 显然 他想送儿子上哈珀走读学校 |
| [26:30] | getting his son into the Harper Day School, | 但事情不太顺利 |
| [26:32] | so Mr. Tanz would love a letter of recommendation | 所以泰兹先生想请您 前任美国总统 |
| [26:35] | – from the former President of the Untied States. – Oh, my God. | – 给他的儿子写封推荐信 – 我的天 |
| [26:37] | Is he joking? | 他在搞笑吗? |
| [26:38] | I mean, I can’t write | 我的意思是 |
| [26:40] | multiple letters of recommendation | 我一个前任总统 也不能给一个走读学校 |
| [26:43] | to some grammar school. | 写好几封推荐信吧 |
| [26:44] | Mike, give me the letter. | 迈克 把信给我 |
| [26:48] | – And– and what is his son’s name? – Prescott. | – 还有 额 他儿子叫什么 – 普瑞斯考特 |
| [26:51] | Prescott. Who does he think he’s trying to kid? Okay. | 普瑞斯考特 这是什么烂名字? 好吧 |
| [26:54] | Anyway, use this letter that Mike wrote. | 总之 就用这封迈克写的信吧 |
| [26:57] | It’s beautifully written, too, by the way. | 而且 顺便一说 写的蛮优美的 |
| [26:59] | Mike, would you mind fixing this all up? | 迈克 你介意处理这些事吗? |
| [27:02] | No, no. It’ll just take a moment. | 不 不 这一会儿就搞定了 |
| [27:03] | It’s for the library, though. You know that, right? | 这都是为了我们的图书馆 你知道的 对吧? |
| [27:05] | Sure. You want me to take out | 当然知道 你想让我去掉信里写的 |
| [27:06] | that I worked for you diligently for 20 years? | 我为你辛勤工作了二十年的这些话吗? |
| [27:08] | Diligently? I– I’m not sure I concur with that. | 辛勤的? 你 你这话我可不敢苟同 |
| [27:10] | – Look, are you okay with this? – Yeah. | – 你对这事没有意见吧? – 没有 |
| [27:12] | She’s gonna get into the school anyway. | 不管怎么样你女儿最终还是会被录取的 |
| [27:14] | – She’s Asian. – Sure. | – 她是亚裔嘛 – 当然 |
| [27:17] | He can’t afford private | 让女儿上私立学校 |
| [27:18] | school to begin with. – That’s what I told him. | 他本来就负担不起 – 我也是这么跟他说的 |
| [27:20] | It’s like she doesn’t hear me or even see me. | 就好像她听不见我说的 或者说是根本看不见我 |
| [27:23] | And anytime she does, all she cares about is tearing me down, | 而她每次这么做 目的都只是要让我崩溃 |
| [27:27] | and it’s like she’s | 她就好像 |
| [27:27] | – trying to ruin everything. – Okay, Catherine, | – 要毁掉一切一样 – 好了 凯瑟琳 |
| [27:29] | I know I’m not supposed to interrupt you, | 我知道我本不应该打断你 |
| [27:31] | but do you realize these are the same complaints | 但你真的意识到了这十五年来你都在 |
| [27:33] | you’ve had for 15 years? | 抱怨同样的事情吗? |
| [27:35] | Yeah, but they’re not exactly the same. | 是有点 也不是完全一样的 |
| [27:37] | I think that things have changed. | 我觉得有些事还是变了 |
| [27:38] | Okay, Catherine, sit up. You’re slouching. | 嗯 凯瑟琳 坐正 你的坐相又变难看了 |
| [27:41] | And what is that on your sweater? | 你那毛衣上是什么? |
| [27:43] | It’s just, like, a woman’s face with sunglasses on. | 那就是 额 女人带着墨镜的脸 |
| [27:48] | Let’s stop for today. | 我们今天就到这里吧 |
| [27:51] | What’s happening with my wax statue? | 我的蜡像现在怎么样了? |
| [27:53] | Gary and I were able to have you placed | 盖瑞和我将会确保蜡像 |
| [27:56] | on the replica of the Truman Balcony. | 被安置在复刻的杜鲁门阳台上 |
| [27:58] | – Oh! – So, it’s very, very high up. | – 喔! – 所以您的蜡像会在很高很高的地方 |
| [28:00] | – And safe. – And you are encased in glass | – 而且很安全 – 并且你的蜡像是被装在 |
| [28:03] | from the front and the back… | 封闭的玻璃展盒里的… |
| [28:04] | – It’s very safe. – …um, all around. | – 非常安全 – …全封闭的 |
| [28:06] | It’s very striking and stately. | 看起来非常醒目和庄严 |
| [28:07] | So, people were trying to have sex with my statue. | 所以是有人想要和我的雕像嘿咻是吧 |
| [28:10] | – Yeah. – Domestic terrorism. | – 呃 有 – 国内的恐怖组织 |
| [28:12] | Still, it’s better than standing next to Gerald Ford. | 那也好过站在杰拉尔德·福特(美国第38届总统)旁边好 |
| [28:14] | – Oh. – That’s the spirit. | – 噢 – 就是这个意思 |
| [28:16] | See, when people get near this, | 所以说 当人们靠近这样一副身躯 |
| [28:18] | – they just wanna do it. – Oh, yeah. | – 他们总有人会忍不住想做那些羞羞的事 – 说的对啊 |
| [28:20] | Thank God you’re not trying to do me all the time. | 你在我身边这么久都没这么想真是谢天谢地 |
| [28:23] | Right? | 对吧? |
| [28:24] | – You all right? – Dominoes. | – 你还好吗 – 呀 快看这个小玩意 |