| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | Oh, no. Oh, my God. | 不好 我的天呐 |
| [00:03] | What’s wrong? | 怎么了 |
| [00:07] | Never mind. | 没事 |
| [00:07] | I thought Lena Dunham’s dog died. | 我以为丽娜·德纳姆的狗狗死了 |
| [00:11] | It’s just my aunt’s. | 只是我姨妈的而已 |
| [00:17] | Heather’s pregnant. | 海瑟怀孕了 |
| [00:18] | – Who? – Heather, she’s pregnant. | -谁 -海瑟啊 她怀孕了 |
| [00:22] | – Holy shit. – Who’s Heather? | -我靠啊 -海瑟是谁 |
| [00:25] | Heather. | 海瑟啊 |
| [00:26] | Yeah, I understand it’s a name commonly given | 好吧 我知道那是个80年代 |
| [00:28] | to human women in the ’80s, | 十分常见的女性名字 |
| [00:30] | but I have no idea who Heather is. | 但我还是不知道海瑟是谁 |
| [00:32] | Heather. | 海瑟 |
| [00:32] | Oh, my God. | 天呐 |
| [00:34] | How do you not know who Heather is? | 你怎么会不知道海瑟是谁啊 |
| [00:36] | Heather of “Heather, Gretchen, | 就是”海瑟 格雷琴 贝娜黛特 |
| [00:38] | Bernadette, Justine, and Cory.” | 嘉丝丁和科莉”五人帮中的海瑟啊 |
| [00:40] | My main crew, my girls. | 我的死党 我的闺蜜帮啊 |
| [00:42] | I’ve never heard of any of these people. | 我从未听过这些人当中的任何一个 |
| [00:44] | Heather used to work with Justine. | 海瑟以前跟嘉丝丁一起工作 |
| [00:46] | But not Tattoo Justine, Ecstasy Justine. | 但不是纹身嘉丝丁 是摇头丸嘉丝丁 |
| [00:48] | And Bernadette used to date Rose’s boyfriend | 贝娜黛特以前跟罗丝的男友是一对 |
| [00:50] | when they were in that band together, | 当时他们都是那个乐队的成员 |
| [00:51] | and then she started dating Rose. | 之后她竟然跟罗丝在一起了 |
| [00:53] | And Cory was the bartender at Pistol | 科莉以前是手枪酒吧的酒保 |
| [00:54] | where we used to drink all the time | 我们以前老去那里喝酒 |
| [00:55] | because they had great trance night and even better cocaine. | 因为他们有超赞的迷幻之夜和更赞的可卡因 |
| [00:58] | I’ve literally never heard any of those words from you before. | 我真的从没听你说过这些事 |
| [01:02] | Except cocaine. | 除了可卡因 |
| [01:03] | I can’t believe she’s pregnant again. | 难以相信她居然又怀孕了 |
| [01:05] | What a dummy. | 真是够蠢的 |
| [01:07] | I wonder how much abobos even cost these days. | 不知道现在堕胎一次要花多少钱 |
| [01:10] | I should offer to go with her. | 我该问问她要不要陪她去 |
| [01:12] | We could get post-abobo mani-pedis. | 我们可以堕胎后去修脚甲 |
| [01:14] | Oh, Gretchen, you don’t need to pretend you have friends. | 格雷琴 你不用假装你有朋友 |
| [01:18] | What? I have friends. | 什么 我有朋友的 |
| [01:19] | No, there’s nothing wrong with not having friends. | 不 没朋友也没什么错啊 |
| [01:23] | I don’t. | 我就没有 |
| [01:24] | You don’t have any friends? | 你没有朋友吗 |
| [01:25] | Nope, friends are for babies. | 没有 小孩子才交朋友 |
| [01:27] | Even my grandma has tons of friends. | 连我奶奶都有无数个朋友 |
| [01:30] | You never outgrow the need to feel connected to people. | 无论你长到多大年纪 都有跟人亲近的情感需求 |
| [01:32] | Nah, not me. | 不 我就没有 |
| [01:34] | So if you’re so close, | 那如果你们真这么亲密 |
| [01:35] | why haven’t I met any of these “Girls”? | 为什么我到现在都没见过这些”闺蜜”呢 |
| [01:37] | I haven’t seen ’em in a couple months. | 我好几个月没见过她们了 |
| [01:39] | Been super busy. | 最近超忙 |
| [01:40] | Yeah, with my dick. | 是啊 忙着玩屌 |
| [01:43] | Sorry, I’ve been doing a lot of online gaming. | 抱歉 我最近经常打网游 |
| [01:46] | I’m in a war with this autistic kid from Sweden | 我跟一个瑞典的自闭症小孩在干仗 |
| [01:48] | who keeps blocking me on Instagram. | 他老是在Ins上屏蔽我 |
| [01:50] | Oh, you’re on Instagram? | 你还用Ins呢 |
| [01:51] | Yeah, mostly I just use it to stalk Vernon. | 是啊 通常就是用来跟踪弗南的动态而已 |
| [01:53] | His photos are tragic. | 他的照片简直太惨烈了 |
| [01:55] | Ooh, I want to see. | 我想看看 |
| [01:58] | Did he get a selfie stick? | 他买了自拍杆吗 |
| [02:01] | What the…? | 搞什么… |
| [02:02] | – What did you just do? – I accidentally liked his photo. | -你干了什么 -我不小心赞了他的照片 |
| [02:04] | Oh, quick, uh, unlike it. | 快点 取消赞 |
| [02:06] | Goddamn it, woman! | 该死的 你这婆娘 |
| [02:08] | I did it really fast. | 我取消得非常快 |
| [02:09] | I’m sure he didn’t even notice. | 相信他根本不会注意到 |
| [02:10] | Oh, my God! | 天呐 |
| [02:10] | 弗南·巴巴拉 整形外科医生 | |
| [02:13] | Finally happened! | 终于成真了 |
| [02:16] | Sorry about that. | 我很抱歉 |
| [02:17] | Yeah, so… turns out, you’re gonna lose the leg. | 好了 结果就是 你要失去那条腿了 |
| [02:23] | Yes. | 太棒了 |
| [02:42] | You’re so lucky you live near water. | 你好幸运 你住的地方附近有水 |
| [02:45] | You live half a mile from the ocean. | 你家离海只有半英里 |
| [02:46] | Ugh, seagulls, sand dollars. | 恶心 海鸥 海胆 |
| [02:49] | Fat people in blankets drinking orange soda. | 一堆肥佬裹着毛毯喝橘子汽水 |
| [02:52] | No thanks, ocean. | 免了吧 大海 |
| [02:54] | Ooh, another dick pic. | 又收到一张鸡巴照 |
| [02:57] | And… forwarded. | 转发 成功 |
| [02:59] | Online dating is so fun. | 网上约会好好玩 |
| [03:01] | Who are you forwarding them to? | 你把照片转发给谁了 |
| [03:02] | This gay porn site pays me ten bucks a dick. | 我每上传一张鸡巴照 那个基佬黄网就付我10美元 |
| [03:05] | I have a job. | 我有工作了耶 |
| [03:09] | Look. | 看 |
| [03:10] | Ew, whose pee stick is that? | 真恶 那是谁的验尿棒啊 |
| [03:12] | Heather, she got herself knocked up again. | 海瑟 她又怀上了 |
| [03:15] | You know, “Heather, Bernadette, Justine, Cory.” | 就是 “海瑟 贝娜黛特 嘉丝丁 科莉” |
| [03:18] | I haven’t seen those basic hos in a minute. | 我有段时间没见过那几个小婊砸了 |
| [03:20] | Probably ’cause you went into hiding on the west side | 可能是因为你躲在了西边 |
| [03:22] | where no cool girls deign to go. | 根本没有酷姑娘肯去 |
| [03:24] | Well, I’m back in the real world and crushing this dick pic game. | 我已经回到现实世界 完胜这个屌照游戏了 |
| [03:27] | Well, I’m glad. | 我很开心 |
| [03:28] | I was a little worried about you after Paul left. | 保罗离开后 我本来有点担心你的 |
| [03:30] | I’m not gonna lie. | 我不打算说假话 |
| [03:32] | It’s hard when you reach over in the morning | 当你早上醒来伸过手去 |
| [03:34] | and there’s no one there | 没人在你身边 |
| [03:34] | except for the sandwich you fell asleep eating. | 只有你睡前吃剩的三明治 那种感觉很难受的 |
| [03:37] | You need closure from that nerd. | 你得跟那个书呆子彻底了结了才行 |
| [03:40] | You know what? I’m gonna have a party. | 知道吗 我要开个派对 |
| [03:42] | Reconnect with my girls, | 跟我的闺蜜们重新聚聚 |
| [03:43] | throw down old-school like we used to. | 玩点老式风格的 像过去那样 |
| [03:45] | I’ve been looking to rub Paul’s face | 我很想在保罗面前得瑟一下 |
| [03:47] | in how dope I look and how fun my life is. | 我现在多酷 生活多精彩 |
| [03:49] | Inviting him to a get-together | 邀请他参加聚会 |
| [03:50] | where I’m smooching some Tinder rando is a perfect way to do it. | 看我跟约炮软件上约来的帅哥搂搂抱抱 |
| [03:53] | It’s not a “Get-together,” It’s a party. | 不是聚会 是狂欢派对 |
| [03:55] | My girls don’t do “Get-togethers.” | 我的闺蜜们才不搞什么聚会 |
| [03:57] | Par-tay. | 趴 体 |
| [03:58] | Par-tay… | 趴 体 |
| [04:02] | Excuse me! | 打扰一下 |
| [04:05] | You dropped something! | 你东西掉了 |
| [04:09] | No, it’s more to the left. | 不是 左边一点 |
| [04:15] | I really think Lindsay is beginning to consider me, you know? | 我真觉得琳赛开始在考虑我了 |
| [04:18] | Sexually. | 性吸引 |
| [04:19] | I was wondering if I should make a move. | 我在想我是不是该采取点行动 |
| [04:22] | That’s a terrible idea. | 这主意太糟了 |
| [04:23] | That’s exactly what I thought, because she’s still married. | 我也是这么想的 因为她还没离婚 |
| [04:26] | That’s not what I meant. | 我不是这意思 |
| [04:27] | I mean, I come from a family of honor. | 我来自一个光荣之家 |
| [04:31] | Well, directly, I come from a family | 直白点讲 我的家族当中有人 |
| [04:32] | of home invaders, identity thieves | 干过入室抢劫 窃取身份这种事 |
| [04:34] | and, in my Uncle Xavier’s case, | 而我叔叔泽维尔 |
| [04:35] | the butt-stabber of San Pasqual. | 是桑帕斯卡地区的”捅屁股大盗” |
| [04:37] | But my lineage is one of honor, | 但我的血统是光荣的 |
| [04:39] | and so to clean the deck ethically, | 所以为了名义的正当性 |
| [04:42] | I’m gonna ask Paul for permission to pursue his wife. | 我打算请求保罗同意我追求他妻子 |
| [04:46] | Please videotape that exchange. | 到时候请务必录下谈话内容 |
| [04:48] | That way, I’ll be free to put the moves on Lindsay at our party. | 那样我就可以在派对上对琳赛采取行动了 |
| [04:53] | What party? | 什么派对 |
| [04:54] | Gretchen’s throwing a party for her girls. | 格雷琴打算开派对请她的闺蜜们来玩 |
| [04:56] | I never agreed to a party. | 我可没同意开派对 |
| [04:58] | We proxy-voted you. | 我们替你投票决定了 |
| [04:59] | You lost two-to-one. | 二比一 你输了 |
| [05:01] | Wait, if you didn’t know about the party, | 等等 如果你不知道派对的事 |
| [05:04] | why’d you think we bought all this alcohol? | 你觉得我们买这么多酒是要干嘛 |
| [05:06] | Oh, great, now I have to go back to the store for my stuff. | 这下好了 我还得回店里专门买我的东西 |
| [05:12] | Be strong, be straight, | 强大 坦率 |
| [05:13] | be firm, be confident. | 坚定 自信 |
| [05:15] | Be strong, be straight, be firm, be confident. | 强大 坦率 坚定 自信 |
| [05:17] | Edgar. | 埃德加 |
| [05:20] | How nice of you to visit my little backyard Shangri-la. | 你能来我的小后院香格里拉真是太好了 |
| [05:24] | Wh-Whose house is this? | 这是谁的房子 |
| [05:26] | My biking buddy Connor. | 我的骑行伙伴康纳的 |
| [05:28] | His wife Mimi died recently, | 他妻子米米最近去世了 |
| [05:30] | and I wanted to make sure he wasn’t alone. | 我想确保不让他一个人待着 |
| [05:32] | What happened? | 怎么回事 |
| [05:33] | Recumbent bikes have many good qualities, | 卧式自行车有很多优点 |
| [05:35] | but they’re sometimes hard to see from up high. | 但有时候在高处很难发现其存在 |
| [05:37] | Oh, no. | 天呐 |
| [05:38] | The driver of the semi never knew she was there. | 那个卡车司机完全没发现她在那里 |
| [05:41] | Poor thing was dragged three miles. | 那个可怜的家伙被拖着跑了3英里 |
| [05:44] | You’ve never seen Connor pedal so fast. | 从来没看过康纳踩这么快 |
| [05:46] | He kept motioning frantically for the truck to stop, | 他一直疯狂地追 想让卡车停下来 |
| [05:49] | but the driver thought he wanted him to honk. | 但司机以为他想让他按喇叭 |
| [05:52] | She was actually alive until the semi got on the freeway. | 在半挂车上高速前 她其实都还是活着的 |
| [05:55] | Well, that’s the most terrible story… | 这故事太悲惨了 |
| [05:56] | Sad thing is, Mimi didn’t want to go out that day | 最令人心碎的是 米米那天原本不想出去 |
| [05:59] | because her safety flag had been stolen outside the junior high. | 因为她的安全旗在初中外面被偷了 |
| [06:03] | But Connor told her they could stop at the bike store | 但康纳说他们可以赛跑去星巴克喝完茶之后 |
| [06:05] | after they raced to Starbucks for tea. | 顺路去自行车店看看 |
| [06:08] | Uh, please give my condolences to Con… | 请替我慰问一下康… |
| [06:10] | The really sad thing is that Connor wanted to let Mimi win | 最令人伤心的是 康纳想让米米赢 |
| [06:13] | because her impetigo had been flaring up again. | 因为她的脓疱病又开始爆发了 |
| [06:16] | That’s the only reason she reached the intersection first. | 所以她才会先到十字路口 |
| [06:19] | I don’t need to hear every… | 我不需要听每个… |
| [06:19] | The extra sad thing is, | 最最令人伤心的是 |
| [06:21] | the whole time she was being dragged towards the onramp, | 她被拖上斜坡弯道时 |
| [06:25] | she was texting Connor. | 她还在给康纳发短信 |
| [06:27] | Her phone still accessible in its holder on the handlebars, you see? | 她的手机放在手把上的固定器上 依然可以用的 |
| [06:31] | I saw the texts. | 我看了那些短信 |
| [06:33] | They’re quite chilling. | 令人不寒而栗 |
| [06:38] | You had something you wanted to talk about? | 你有什么事情要说来着 |
| [06:40] | Yeah, I have to be up front with you. | 是啊 我必须对你直说了 |
| [06:43] | I’m gonna go after your woman. | 我要追求你的女人 |
| [06:44] | Please don’t go after Amy. | 请别追求艾米 |
| [06:47] | Oh, uh, no. | 不是 |
| [06:48] | Lindsay. | 是琳赛 |
| [06:52] | I’m actually glad to hear she’s moving on. | 实际上 我很高兴得知她向前看了 |
| [06:55] | Now I can move Amy out of the Days Inn. | 现在我可以把艾米从戴斯酒店接回来了 |
| [06:57] | Then it’s a win-win. | 那就是双赢了 |
| [06:58] | Few of those in this world. | 在这世上可不常见啊 |
| [07:05] | Tea time’s always hardest for Connor. | 下午茶时间对康纳来说一直很难熬 |
| [07:33] | My date tonight is everything Paul isn’t. | 我今晚的约会对象跟保罗恰恰相反 |
| [07:35] | He’s tall, he’s thin, he’s dumb. | 他很高 他很瘦 他很呆 |
| [07:39] | Look. | 看 |
| [07:40] | And he’s fun, too. | 他还很幽默 |
| [07:41] | He spells “Titties” With a “Z.” | 他管”咪咪”叫”奶子” |
| [07:43] | You’re so getting murdered. | 你要被他迷死了 |
| [07:45] | I know. | 我知道 |
| [07:52] | Hello. | 你好 |
| [07:53] | Um, excuse me. Excu… | 抱歉 那个… |
| [07:56] | Hello. | 你好 |
| [07:59] | Can you read? | 不识字吗 |
| [08:16] | Why is Killian bartending? | 为什么卡利安在调酒 |
| [08:18] | Oh, while I was unloading the car, he snuck up on me | 我之前在下货时 他悄悄走过来 |
| [08:20] | and said that things were scary | 说事情变得很可怕 |
| [08:22] | because his parents were taking some time apart. | 因为他的父母分居了 |
| [08:25] | Then he asked if we were having a party. | 然后他问我是不是要开派对 |
| [08:27] | He caught me at a weak moment. | 他趁虚而入 让我难以抗拒 |
| [08:29] | So you put him to work? | 所以你就让他做事吗 |
| [08:31] | What? | 什么 |
| [08:32] | I’m supposed to just let him mingle at an adult gathering? | 我难道让他随意融入到成年人的聚会中吗 |
| [08:35] | Good point. | 有道理 |
| [08:36] | I am so stoked for you to meet my girls! | 我迫不及待想让你见见我的闺蜜们了 |
| [08:39] | They’re super hard-core. | 她们超级猛的 |
| [08:40] | Bernadette is such a lush. | 贝娜黛特是个十足的酒鬼 |
| [08:42] | And no shit, I wouldn’t be surprised | 说真的 如果嘉丝丁想给你口交 |
| [08:44] | if Justine tried to blow you. | 我也不意外 |
| [08:46] | She bangs everyone’s boyfriends. | 她把大家的男朋友都上了个遍 |
| [08:47] | Then she’s super apologetic about it. | 然后她再深表歉意 |
| [08:49] | This party’s gonna be so dope. | 这次派对一定很拽 |
| [08:50] | I thought it was a get-together. | 我以为这是一次聚会 |
| [08:52] | We have a bartender. | 我们都有调酒师了 |
| [09:00] | Oh, no. | 不好 |
| [09:01] | Gretchen, I’ve been catfished. | 格雷琴 我被耍了 |
| [09:04] | Oh, buddy. | 姐们儿 |
| [09:05] | He’s actually a nine-year-old boy. | 他其实是个9岁的男孩 |
| [09:07] | His stepmom caught him sexting with some other skank, | 他的继母抓到他和另一个骚货发黄色短信 |
| [09:09] | and she wrote to me. | 然后给我写邮件了 |
| [09:11] | No wonder he didn’t know how to spell titties. | 难怪他不会拼写”咪咪” |
| [09:13] | What am I gonna do now? | 我现在该怎么办 |
| [09:14] | Paul is coming; I’m gonna look like such a loser. | 保罗就要来了 我看起来会像个傻逼 |
| [09:18] | How old are you? | 你今年多大 |
| [09:19] | Sorry, ma’am, I’m working. | 抱歉 女士 我在工作 |
| [09:21] | They’re here. | 她们来了 |
| [09:23] | Bitches! | 碧池们 |
| [09:27] | Whoa, did you bring your own pony keg to the party? | 你自带啤酒桶来参加派对了吗 |
| [09:30] | You drunk. | 你个酒鬼 |
| [09:31] | It’s a baby. | 是孩子啦 |
| [09:32] | Oh, why do you have a baby? | 你怎么会有个孩子 |
| [09:34] | Because I had a baby. | 因为我生了个孩子啊 |
| [09:38] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [09:40] | You’re not still pregnant, are you? | 别告诉我你还怀着呢 |
| [09:42] | I think so. | 我想是的 |
| [09:43] | Ew, I’m sorry. | 不好意思 |
| [09:44] | I hate that. | 真扫兴啊 |
| [09:45] | I mean, if you’re willing to drive to Whittier, | 如果你们愿意开车到惠蒂尔市 |
| [09:47] | there’s this place you can just walk in. | 有个地方你可以大摇大摆地进去堕胎 |
| [09:48] | It’s right near a Marie Callender’s. | 就在一家玛丽餐馆附近 |
| [09:49] | We can make a day of it. | 我们可以选个日子去 |
| [09:50] | – What are you drinking? – I’m not. | -你喝什么 -我不喝 |
| [09:52] | I mean, if you’re getting rid of it… | 我是说 如果你想打掉… |
| [10:00] | Where’s Cory? | 科莉呢 |
| [10:00] | She hit a bit of a rough patch. | 她现在处境不太好 |
| [10:03] | What’s going on? | 怎么了啊 |
| [10:04] | We’re “Heather, Gretchen, | 我们是”海瑟 格雷琴 |
| [10:05] | Bernadette, Justine and Cory.” | 贝娜黛特 嘉丝丁和科莉”五人帮啊 |
| [10:07] | None of us have actually had much time to hang in a while, | 我们几个很长时间没机会一起玩了 |
| [10:10] | so this is like a mini-reunion for us, too. | 所以这次也像是一次小聚 |
| [10:13] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [10:17] | please tell me you’re still a total alcoholic. | 请告诉我你依然是个彻头彻尾的酒鬼 |
| [10:19] | Of course. | 当然了 |
| [10:20] | – Thank God. – I do. Every day. | -感谢上帝 -我每天都感谢他 |
| [10:23] | Jesus Christ. | 我的老天啊 |
| [10:30] | We’re out of chips. | 薯片吃没了 |
| [10:33] | Listen, I’ve been thinking a lot about what happened the other night. | 听着 关于那天晚上的事 我想了很多 |
| [10:37] | What happened? | 什么事 |
| [10:38] | I know that I was “Taking photos” of you for “Dating purposes” | 我知道帮你”拍照” 是因为你想找对象 |
| [10:41] | with “Guys who have a lot of money and/or giant hogs…” | 你想找个”财大器粗”的男人 |
| [10:44] | You memorized my profile. | 你记得我的个人档案 |
| [10:46] | Look, Lindsay, | 听着 琳赛 |
| [10:48] | I’m in a really good place right now. | 我现在处于很不错的状态 |
| [10:50] | I feel strong | 我觉得很强大 |
| [10:51] | and ever since you got separated from… | 自从你说你要和那谁分开 |
| [10:53] | – Paul. – Right, Paul. | -保罗 -对 保罗 |
| [10:55] | – So I… – Hello, Lindsay. | -所以我… -你好啊 琳赛 |
| [10:58] | Edgar. | 埃德加 |
| [10:58] | – Hey… – Hello, Paul. | -好啊 -你好 保罗 |
| [11:00] | Look, Lindsay, | 听着 琳赛 |
| [11:02] | we didn’t want to ambush you, but, uh… | 我们并非故意想给你来个突然袭击的 但是… |
| [11:05] | What the farts? | 什么屁东西 |
| [11:07] | Hi, Lindsay. | 琳赛 你好 |
| [11:09] | Listen, I’d never want to | 听着 我真的不想 |
| [11:10] | make you feel uncomfortable at your own party. | 让你在自己的派对上感觉不自在 |
| [11:13] | Paul told me you’d be okay with this, | 保罗说你已经看开了 |
| [11:15] | but eek, you know? | 但是 你知道吗 |
| [11:18] | I’d feel better if I heard it from the ol’ horse’s mouth. | 如果能听旧爱亲口说出来 我会感觉好受些 |
| [11:20] | Are you calling me an old horse? | 你是在骂我是老旧的东西吗 |
| [11:22] | And scout’s honor, if you want us to skedaddle, | 以女童军的名义 如果你想让我们离开 |
| [11:24] | well, we’ll get skedaddlin’. | 我们立马离开 |
| [11:31] | it might have been a little weird, | 这可能有点怪怪的 |
| [11:33] | but ever since… | 但是自从… |
| [11:37] | this happened, | 我们在一起了 |
| [11:38] | any jealous bone has left my body. | 任何嫉妒的因素已经不复存在了 |
| [11:41] | Old bone out, new bone in. | 旧”鸟”去 新”鸟”来 |
| [11:43] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [11:46] | I’m Amy Cadingle. | 我叫艾米·卡丁格 |
| [11:47] | Edgar Quintero. Lindsay’s honey. | 我是埃德加·坤塔罗 琳赛的小亲亲 |
| [11:50] | Edgar. | 埃德加 |
| [11:51] | F.T.W. | 稳拿啊 |
| [11:54] | That means “For the win.” | 意思是 “稳稳地搞定” |
| [12:07] | There you are. I got your message on my ‘Gram. | 你在这呢 我在Ins上收到你的消息了 |
| [12:10] | Received loud and clear. | 清清楚楚地明白了 |
| [12:12] | Oh, goddamn it, Gretchen. | 该死的格雷琴 |
| [12:13] | I don’t know what it is | 我不知道是怎么回事 |
| [12:14] | about us that our relish keeps going south. | 让我们的关系变得越来越差 |
| [12:17] | Maybe we just have too much in common. | 也许是因为我们有太多共同点了 |
| [12:18] | We have nothing in common. | 我们没有任何共同点 |
| [12:20] | We’re like Hall & Oates. | 我们就像”霍尔与奥兹”[二重唱组合] |
| [12:22] | There’s clearly frisson between them, you know? | 他们之间有明显的火花 知道吗 |
| [12:25] | And maybe it’s the electricity of two alphas that’s caused them | 也许正是两个天才间的火花让他们 |
| [12:30] | to churn out the finest catalog of hits in pop history. | 在流行音乐史上留下绝佳的热门歌曲 |
| [12:33] | So let’s get past all this nonsense | 所以 不如我们忘掉以前的不愉快 |
| [12:36] | and make our “Method of Modern Love.” | 创造属于我们的《现代爱情论》 |
| [12:38] | That isn’t even one of their better songs. | 那根本不是他们的经典好歌 |
| [12:42] | You’re right. | 你说得对 |
| [12:43] | It’s their best song. | 那是他们的最佳歌曲 |
| [12:45] | We have a great rapport. | 我们有惊人的默契 |
| [12:47] | You should do my podcast. | 你应该当我的播客 |
| [12:49] | Jimmy! | 吉米 |
| [12:51] | Great party! | 很棒的派对 |
| [12:53] | I have a girlfriend. | 我有女朋友了 |
| [12:57] | It wasn’t really my intention to get into education, | 其实我不是有意进入教育事业的 |
| [13:00] | but when I substituted that first day, | 但当我第一天代课 |
| [13:03] | it just kind of… clicked. | 真的是…很合拍 |
| [13:06] | Remember when you had that birthday party | 还记得你那次生日派对吗 |
| [13:09] | and we locked you in your bedroom | 我们把你锁在卧室里 |
| [13:10] | ’cause you were yelling at your guests | 因为你一直对客人大吼 |
| [13:12] | and threatening suicide by cop? | 还威胁要借助警察之手自杀 |
| [13:14] | Unfortunately. | 真不幸 |
| [13:15] | And then you climbed out the fire escape | 之后你从防火通道爬出去 |
| [13:16] | and came back in the front and yelled, | 又从前门回来 喊道 |
| [13:18] | “I’m back, cocksuckers!” | “老娘回来了 贱人们” |
| [13:21] | That was hilarious! | 多好笑啊 |
| [13:22] | That was mortifying, actually. | 实际上 那很难堪 |
| [13:25] | It’s a great story. | 很精彩的故事 |
| [13:26] | I have enough of those to last a lifetime. | 我已经干过太多这种事 足以折磨我一生了 |
| [13:31] | Seriously, thanks for inviting us to your get-together. | 说真的 感谢你邀请我们参加聚会 |
| [13:34] | – Party. – It seems more like a get-together. | -是派对 -但感觉更像聚会啊 |
| [13:37] | It’s a goddamn party… | 就是他妈的…派对 |
| [13:38] | Okay, Gretchen. | 好吧 格雷琴 |
| [13:40] | Oh, my God. Look. | 我的天 快看 |
| [13:43] | Cory! | 科莉 |
| [13:44] | Thank God you’re here. | 谢天谢地你来了 |
| [13:46] | How are you? | 你还好吗 |
| [13:47] | Need A Drink status. | 急需喝杯酒 |
| [13:52] | That’s better. | 好多了 |
| [13:57] | – ‘Sup? – Hi, Cor. | -还好吗 -嗨 小科 |
| [14:00] | What’s that? | 那是什么 |
| [14:01] | – It’s my baby. – Gross. | -是我的宝宝 -真恶心 |
| [14:06] | And I’m gonna go over here. | 我还是到那边去吧 |
| [14:08] | Nice to see you, Cory. | 很高兴见到你 科莉 |
| [14:11] | Cor, I’m pregnant. Could you not… | 小科 我怀孕了 你能不能… |
| [14:12] | Not smoke at a party? | 不在派对上抽烟吗 |
| [14:14] | No, I cannot not smoke at a party. | 不行 我做不到不在派对上抽烟 |
| [14:16] | Can you not bring your unborn tummy worm to a party? | 那你能别把那条没出生的肉虫带来派对吗 |
| [14:19] | Gretchen invited us, offspring and all. | 是格雷琴邀请我们的 孩子也要带着 |
| [14:21] | I didn’t actually invite babies, per se. | 其实我并没有邀请婴孩 |
| [14:24] | Mega-burn. | 暴击 |
| [14:25] | Okay. Well, I guess I’m going over there, too. | 好吧 我也要去那边了 |
| [14:31] | I mean… | 我觉得… |
| [14:38] | I am so glad you’re here. | 我真高兴你来了 |
| [14:41] | They are so different, it’s insane. | 她们都大变样了 太疯狂了 |
| [14:43] | Could I have one of those? | 能给我一根吗 |
| [14:45] | A dollar. | 一美元一根 |
| [14:47] | Are you serious? | 你是认真的吗 |
| [14:48] | Shit, yeah. It’s 2015, bitch, | 当然了 现在是2015年了 贱人 |
| [14:50] | and EBT ain’t even trying to let me buy smokes anymore. | EBT卡都试图不允许我买烟了 |
| [14:52] | Never mind. | 算了吧 |
| [14:54] | So what was that all about? | 刚刚是怎么回事啊 |
| [14:56] | Heather thinks I stole her stereo, suspicious-ass bitch. | 海瑟觉得我偷了她的立体音响 那个多疑的贱人 |
| [14:59] | Oh, my God, that’s crazy. | 天啊 真是太离谱了 |
| [15:00] | I know. I just borrowed it. | 我也觉得 我只是借用而已 |
| [15:02] | I was totally gonna get it back from the pawnshop | 我肯定会从当铺给她赎回来的啊 |
| [15:04] | and then she got all aggro, | 然后她非要跟我撕逼 |
| [15:05] | and I was like, screw that. | 我心想 去你妈的 |
| [15:07] | That no-trusting-ass bitch. | 那个不懂信任别人的贱人 |
| [15:08] | It was just on principle. | 戳到原则上了 |
| [15:10] | Plus, I had this dog | 另外 我还养了条狗 |
| [15:11] | and it bit this kid in the face and that was a whole thing, | 它咬了一个孩子的脸 又是一堆乱七八糟的事 |
| [15:13] | so it’s not like I wasn’t gonna get high. | 所以我嗑嗨起来也是情有可原的 |
| [15:15] | Yeah. Totally. | 是啊 绝对的 |
| [15:17] | So whose house is this? | 这是谁家啊 |
| [15:19] | Mine. | 我的 |
| [15:22] | All right, now tell me whose nut I should suck on. | 好吧 告诉我跪舔谁就可以住这里 |
| [15:24] | I got kicked out of the shelter again for fighting. | 我因为打架斗殴又被从收容所赶出来了 |
| [15:29] | The amazing thing about 3D puzzles | 3D迷宫玩具很赞的一点 |
| [15:32] | is that they force you | 就是它们会强迫你 |
| [15:34] | to use multiple axes of your cerebral cortex. | 使用你大脑皮层的多个中枢 |
| [15:38] | Me habla puzzles. | 我喜欢迷宫游戏 |
| [15:41] | Right? | 对吧 |
| [15:46] | Ooh, boy. | 天啊 |
| [15:47] | According to my life-logging app, | 根据我的身体指数App |
| [15:49] | I haven’t consumed this much alcohol since after Mimi’s funeral. | 从米米的葬礼后 我就没喝过这么多酒了 |
| [15:53] | Don’t worry. | 别担心 |
| [15:54] | I shall “Boot and rally.” | 我会满血复活的 |
| [16:00] | Hate that dork. | 好讨厌那个呆子 |
| [16:01] | Why’s he got to ruin puzzles with a third “D”? | 为什么他非得以第3D[呆]的身份来打扰我们呢 |
| [16:04] | Want to game it up? | 你想玩吗 |
| [16:07] | Sure. | 好吧 |
| [16:10] | People think Joss Whedon sold out | 乔斯·威登要拍《复仇者联盟》时 |
| [16:11] | when he did The Avengers, | 大家都觉得他这是背叛之举 |
| [16:13] | but that’s like saying | 但那就如同是在说 |
| [16:14] | Hugh Howey should have never expanded Wool | 休·豪伊不该把《羊毛记》 |
| [16:16] | from a Kindle Single to a full novel. | 从单本电子书扩充为一部完整的小说 |
| [16:18] | 23 P.M. Vomited. | 23点 呕吐过 |
| [16:20] | color off-white. | 颜色是灰白色 |
| [16:22] | contens: beer comma hiking gorp.” | 吐的东西 啤酒 以及各种杂食 |
| [16:25] | And there you are, honey. | 你来了啊 亲爱的 |
| [16:29] | What’s that? | 那是什么 |
| [16:30] | What are you doing with your hands? | 你们用手在比划着什么呢 |
| [16:31] | Sorry. It’s ASL. | 抱歉 这是手语 |
| [16:33] | I work as an interpreter. | 我是个翻译 |
| [16:34] | My parents are both deaf. | 我父母都是聋哑人 |
| [16:35] | Sometimes I don’t even notice I’m doing it. | 有时候我不知不觉就在打手语了 |
| [16:37] | I’m learning, too. | 我也在学哦 |
| [16:38] | He’s a natural. | 他有这天赋呢 |
| [16:43] | Ah, somebody’s slurring! | 某人在说含糊话哦 |
| [16:47] | Hey, Gretchen, thanks again, | 嘿 格雷琴 再次感谢你的招待 |
| [16:49] | but it’s kind of late for us. | 但现在有点太晚了 |
| [16:51] | Don’t leave. | 别走啊 |
| [16:53] | I-I’m sorry. | 我很抱歉 |
| [16:53] | I know it’s been, like, almost a year since I last reached out. | 我知道我已经差不多一年没联系过你们了 |
| [16:56] | It’s been over three years. | 是三年多了 |
| [16:58] | It has? | 是吗 |
| [17:00] | – Really? – It’s okay. | -是吗 -没事的 |
| [17:01] | You know, things change. | 一切总是在不断变化中的 |
| [17:02] | That’s God’s business, not ours. | 那是上帝的事 跟我们无关 |
| [17:05] | Come on. | 拜托 |
| [17:06] | Let’s go out some night soon, just the four of us. | 我们尽快找个晚上一起出去嗨 就我们4个 |
| [17:08] | Really catch up. | 好好叙叙旧 |
| [17:09] | You can get a babysitter. | 你可以找个保姆 |
| [17:10] | Dump the kid, we can party like we used to. | 把孩子扔家里 我们可以像过去那样狂欢 |
| [17:12] | The thing is, Gretchen, | 问题是 格雷琴 |
| [17:13] | I don’t want to dump the kid. | 我不想把孩子丢家里 |
| [17:15] | You’ll understand someday. | 总有一天你也会明白的 |
| [17:17] | Bye, sweetheart. | 再见 亲爱的 |
| [17:32] | I made more mashed potato savory cupcakes. | 我又多做了些土豆泥香薄荷纸杯蛋糕 |
| [17:34] | I’m not hungry. | 我不饿 |
| [17:37] | Edgar, I’m sorry. | 埃德加 对不起 |
| [17:40] | For what? | 为什么啊 |
| [17:41] | For using you to try to make Paul jealous. | 因为我利用你想让保罗嫉妒 |
| [17:45] | Amy’s great. | 艾米很棒 |
| [17:46] | Crazy boring | 超级无趣 |
| [17:48] | and, yeah, she has that thing with her eye, but… | 没错 她的眼睛也怪怪的 但是… |
| [17:51] | she’s nice. | 她人很好 |
| [17:53] | And you’re nice. | 你也是个好人 |
| [17:55] | And Paul is nice and I’m… | 保罗也是个好人 但我 |
| [18:00] | not. | 不是 |
| [18:01] | I think you’re great… | 我觉得你很好 |
| [18:02] | No, I’m materialistic. | 不 我是个实利主义者 |
| [18:04] | I’m incapable of being alone. | 我无法孤单一人 |
| [18:07] | I never really learned how to shower that good. | 我从来就没学会怎么好好洗澡 |
| [18:09] | I almost always forget to flush the toilet… | 我还经常忘记冲厕所 |
| [18:15] | What are you doing? | 你在干什么 |
| [18:16] | Sorry. | 抱歉 |
| [18:18] | I’m sorry. I’m sorry. | 抱歉 对不起 |
| [18:22] | Good thinking. | 真是个好主意 |
| [18:23] | He’s watching. Kiss me harder. | 他在看着呢 用力吻我 |
| [18:48] | It’s just like I told Gretchen. | 就跟我对格雷琴说的那样 |
| [18:50] | Friends are for babies. | 小孩子才交朋友呢 |
| [18:52] | And just because I fell in feces | 当年就因为我摔进了粪坑里 |
| [18:53] | and all the kids called me “Shitty Jimmy,” | 其他小朋友都叫我”屎吉米” |
| [18:56] | And I was the smartest kid in my class, | 我是全班最聪明的小孩 |
| [18:57] | that has nothing to do with why I don’t need friends. | 那跟我不需要朋友没有任何关系 |
| [19:00] | Jimmy, I want to tell you something. | 吉米 我想告诉你一件事 |
| [19:02] | I was born dead. | 我生下来就死了 |
| [19:04] | – Sorry, what? – No pulse. | -你说什么 -没有脉搏 |
| [19:06] | Totally blue. | 全身发紫 |
| [19:07] | I died for, like, 15 minutes. | 我大概死了15分钟 |
| [19:11] | Then… bam! | 然后 突然地 |
| [19:13] | Alive. | 活了 |
| [19:14] | You should’ve seen the priest’s face. | 当时牧师脸上的表情简直无法形容 |
| [19:15] | If I could change just one thing about myself, | 如果我可以改变我身上的一点 |
| [19:18] | it’d be that I was born alive. | 那就是我希望我生下来是活的 |
| [19:21] | But you know what I realized? | 但你知道我后来意识到什么了吗 |
| [19:23] | When it comes down to it, | 真要仔细说起来 |
| [19:25] | we’re all born dead. | 每个人生下来都是死的 |
| [19:26] | It’s only through other people, | 只有通过别人 |
| [19:27] | through friends, that we become alive. | 通过朋友的爱 才让我们活过来 |
| [19:30] | Not a last-second mucus vacuum. | 而不是最后一刻把痰吸出来了 |
| [19:35] | Thanks, man. | 谢了 老兄 |
| [19:36] | I love you so much. | 我很爱你 |
| [19:38] | Get out. | 滚出去 |
| [19:39] | I know it makes a lot of people uncomfortable, | 我知道这让很多人不舒服 |
| [19:41] | but you’ll see, I am just like everybody else. | 但你会明白的 我也跟其他人一样 |
| [19:45] | Thanks for letting me come to your party, Jimmy. | 谢谢你让我参加你的派对 吉米 |
| [19:47] | You’re a really good friend. | 你真是个好朋友 |
| [19:50] | Oh, goddamn it. | 该死的 |
| [19:54] | How’d it go with your girls? | 你跟你的闺蜜们玩得怎么样啊 |
| [19:56] | They’re not my girls anymore. | 她们已经不是我的闺蜜了 |
| [19:58] | You were right. Friends are dumb. | 你说得对 朋友太傻逼了 |
| [20:00] | I told you. | 我就说吧 |
| [20:01] | Those basic hos are super basic. | 那些小婊子超级低能的 |
| [20:06] | That’s nice. | 真舒服 |
| [20:08] | I didn’t know things had changed so much. | 我不知道情况已经发生了这么巨大的变化 |
| [20:10] | I just want to go dancing like we used to. | 我只想像过去那样一起去跳舞 |
| [20:12] | Just one more time. | 哪怕再来一次 |
| [20:14] | No, thanks. | 免了 谢谢 |
| [20:15] | I’ll go dancing with you. | 我愿意跟你一起去跳舞 |
| [20:16] | You will? Okay! Let’s go! | 你愿意吗 好啊 走吧 |
| [20:21] | I mean… | 其实… |
| [20:22] | we have booze and music. | 我们有酒和音乐 |
| [20:23] | We can just dance here. | 我们可以在这里跳啊 |
| [20:24] | That sounds perfect. | 那听上去棒极了 |
| [20:26] | Oh, God. | 天啊 |
| [20:30] | Hey. Where’s the stereo? | 天啊 我们的音响呢 |
| [20:37] | ‘Sup, short round? | 你好啊 小子 |
| [20:39] | Want to buy a dope-ass retro turntable? | 你想买个牛逼的音响吗 |
| [20:41] | Comes with most of the wires. | 大部分线都还在 |
| [20:43] | 25 bills. | 只要25美元 |
| [20:44] | I only made six dollars tonight. | 我今晚才挣了6美元 |
| [20:46] | Simple-ass midget. | 傻逼小矮子 |