| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:44] | Morning, Jimmy. | 早上好 吉米 |
| [00:48] | I know you’re asleep, | 我知道你在睡觉 |
| [00:50] | but I just wanted to say our talk last night really… | 但我只想说 我们昨晚的谈话真的… |
| [00:55] | It really was just… so unexpected. | 真的很…出乎意料 |
| [01:00] | And I know we didn’t say anything, | 我知道我们没聊到什么重要的事 |
| [01:02] | but this morning I’m feeling… | 但今早我觉得… |
| [01:05] | Okay! Never mind. | 好了 算了 |
| [01:14] | What are you smiling about over there, | 你坐在那儿傻笑什么 |
| [01:17] | like some sort of gooneybird? | 像只呆鸟一样 |
| [01:19] | Jimmy and I fell asleep on the phone last night. | 我和吉米昨晚聊电话聊到睡着了 |
| [01:23] | Awesome. | 好棒 |
| [01:23] | So, do you think we’ll be in the same homeroom together next year? | 你觉得我们明年会不会在同一个小学教室集合 |
| [01:27] | I know. It was just really… nice. | 我懂的 但真的很… 美好 |
| [01:31] | Does that mean you’re back riding that yogurt tube? | 那是不是代表你又要和那个细屌男操了 |
| [01:34] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
| [01:35] | We’ll see, I guess. | 再说吧 |
| [01:36] | Well, what are you going to do about it? | 你打算采取什么行动 |
| [01:39] | I’m not really a “do something about stuff” kind of person. | 我不是那种会”采取行动”的人 |
| [01:41] | I’m more of a “it’s too late to buy a wedding gift, | 我更像是”来不及买结婚礼物了 |
| [01:44] | so I’ll just stop being friends with them” kind of person. | 直接跟他们断交好了”那种人 |
| [01:46] | Cool. Well, that story finished dumb. | 酷 那故事的结局蛮蠢的 |
| [01:49] | Anyway. | 总之 |
| [01:50] | It all ends today, Gretch. | 今天要有个了结 格雷琴 |
| [01:52] | Becca ruined my life, | 贝卡毁了我的人生 |
| [01:54] | and she needs to know how much damage she’s caused me. | 一定要让她知道她对我造成了多大伤害 |
| [01:57] | And then I’m gonna punch that stupid bitch in her stupid bitch face. | 然后我就要一拳打爆那个蠢婊的蠢婊脸 |
| [02:01] | Ooh, I should probably take these off. | 我最好把耳环给摘了 |
| [02:03] | Hooker fights dirty. | 婊子打架时都出阴招 |
| [02:05] | Okay, let me just press record. | 好了 等我按下录影键 |
| [02:07] | Before you hit her, I’m gonna yell, “worldstar.” | 你揍她之前 我会大喊”世界巨星” |
| [02:09] | Oh, wait. Is it after? | 等等 是该揍完再喊吗 |
| [02:11] | We’ll shoot it both ways. | 两种方式都录一遍吧 |
| [02:16] | Lindsay! | 琳赛 |
| [02:18] | Mom? | 妈 |
| [02:25] | Worldstar! | 世界巨星 |
| [02:48] | Rest in peace, Penny the Penguin. | 安息吧 小企鹅佩妮 |
| [02:50] | I never thought you’d jump. | 我真没想到你会跳下去 |
| [02:52] | She finally flew. If only for one or two seconds. | 她终于飞起来了 哪怕只有短短的一两秒 |
| [02:55] | Dude, are you sure Birds is for kids? | 老哥 你确定《鸟》是拍给儿童看的吗 |
| [02:59] | That’s the second suicide | 那已经是第二例自杀事件了 |
| [03:00] | and they haven’t even left the island yet. | 他们甚至都还没离开岛屿 |
| [03:03] | When Doug assigned us to parody this movie, | 道格叫我们恶搞这部电影时 |
| [03:05] | I don’t think he realized how depressing it is. | 他可能没意识到这电影有多让人抑郁 |
| [03:08] | Well, I have some highly exciting news. | 我有些极度振奋人心的消息 |
| [03:11] | The Width of a Peach is a bestseller! | 《桃色世家》成为了畅销书 |
| [03:16] | It is number seven on Amazon’s Erotica list, | 在亚马逊的情色作品榜上排第七 |
| [03:19] | number five on Amazon’s Erotica subcategory Historical Romance list, | 在亚马逊情色作品”历史爱情类”子榜上排第五 |
| [03:25] | and number one on Amazon’s Erotica subcategory | 在亚马逊情色作品子榜的历史爱情类的子榜下的 |
| [03:29] | Historical Romance subcategories: World War II, UK and Family Fun. | 二战 英国和家庭乐事榜上排第一 |
| [03:34] | That is so great! | 太棒了 |
| [03:36] | I really hope you allow yourself to enjoy this special time. | 我真心希望你能好好享受这特别的时刻 |
| [03:40] | Oh, Jimmy. | 吉米 |
| [03:42] | This is Max. | 这是麦克斯 |
| [03:44] | We’re co-writers at Doug Loves Sketches. | 我们是《道格爱喜剧》的搭档编剧 |
| [03:46] | Bro, you missed a sick party here last night. | 兄弟 你错过了昨晚这里的牛逼派对 |
| [03:49] | Yeah, I-I wouldn’t call it a party. | 我觉得称不上是派对啦 |
| [03:51] | It was more like a meeting. | 更像是聚会多一点 |
| [03:55] | With balloons. | 有气球的那种 |
| [03:56] | Oh, stop. I know all about it. | 省省吧 我都知道了 |
| [03:58] | I talked to Gretchen on the phone last night. | 我昨晚和格雷琴聊电话了 |
| [04:01] | It was just like old times. Easy. Natural. | 就跟以前一样 轻松 自然 |
| [04:05] | We caught up, we joked about the many hilarious tragic ends | 我们聊了彼此的近况 拿卡利安可能会遭遇的 |
| [04:08] | which may have befallen Killian. | 悲惨结局开了玩笑 |
| [04:10] | And then, we fell asleep on the phone together. | 然后 我们聊着聊着就一同睡着了 |
| [04:16] | Like lovers. | 像恋人一样 |
| [04:17] | I don’t want to get ahead of myself, | 我也不想把话说得太早 |
| [04:18] | Edgar and other person, but… | 埃德加和那个路人 不过… |
| [04:21] | I think the door is opening. | 我觉得大门正慢慢打开 |
| [04:25] | You have to tell him. | 你得告诉他 |
| [04:26] | I don’t want to tell him. | 我不想告诉他 |
| [04:27] | – Bro. – Bro. | -兄弟 -兄弟 |
| [04:29] | – Bro? – Bro. | -兄弟 -兄弟 |
| [04:30] | – Bro. – Bro! | -兄弟 -兄弟 |
| [04:31] | Tell me what? | 告诉我什么 |
| [04:35] | Gretchen brought Boone to the party last night. | 格雷琴昨晚把布恩带到派对来了 |
| [04:41] | And his daughter Olivia. So cute. | 还有他女儿奥利维亚 好可爱 |
| [04:44] | Wise, you know? How some kids just look wise? | 很聪明 懂吗 有些孩子看起来就是很聪明 |
| [04:48] | Like, there’s something in their eyes that lets you know | 就像他们的眼神让你知道 |
| [04:51] | they get it, man. | 他们懂的 |
| [04:53] | Like, you can just rap to them, like people, you know? | 你可以直接对他们唱饶舌 |
| [04:56] | What? | 怎么了 |
| [04:59] | Where’s your friend? | 你朋友哪儿去了 |
| [05:01] | So, when my agent called about the role | 先前我的经纪人打电话叫我去演 |
| [05:04] | on ABC’s Man in the Middle, I was so excited. | abc电视网的剧《中间人》时 我好激动 |
| [05:08] | You know, I’m playing a grandmother, | 我要饰演一个外婆 |
| [05:10] | which is a wink-wink to the audience, of course, | 当然了 那是个幌子而已 |
| [05:12] | because as if that were possible. | 因为怎么可能有这么年轻貌美的外婆 |
| [05:18] | Hello, Lindsay. | 你好 琳赛 |
| [05:19] | Did your apartment get taken over by pigeons again? | 你的公寓又被鸽子占领了吗 |
| [05:22] | Thanks for telling me Mom was coming. | 谢谢你告诉我妈妈要来 |
| [05:24] | Of course she would visit Tallulah, my baby, | 她当然会来看我家宝贝塔卢拉 |
| [05:27] | that I actually had. | 我亲自生的 |
| [05:29] | Hey, can someone take her for a little while? | 谁能帮忙看一下她 |
| [05:31] | I’m doing an all-night shift and I’m running on fumes. | 我忙了一整夜 真的精疲力尽了 |
| [05:34] | I got these pills they use to wake people up from comas, | 我吃了些用来唤醒昏迷病人的药物 |
| [05:37] | but now I can hear my blinks. | 但现在我能听到自己眨眼的声音 |
| [05:39] | I had her, you watch her. That was the deal. | 孩子我来生 你来带 我们说好了的 |
| [05:42] | Besides, my mommy’s visiting me. | 再说了 我妈咪来看我了 |
| [05:45] | Oh, you know, that reminds me… | 说到这个 我想起来了 |
| [05:47] | Vernon, I received a welcome bag from the show, | 弗南 节目组送了我一个欢迎礼包 |
| [05:51] | and I thought you might want this. | 我觉得你应该会喜欢这个 |
| [05:54] | A real-life Bluetooth speaker! No way! | 居然是蓝牙音响 好棒耶 |
| [05:56] | So sick! | 太酷了 |
| [05:59] | Hope you like Sublime. | 希望你喜欢Sublime神器 |
| [06:01] | Mommy, I’m so happy you’re here. | 妈咪 你来这里我好开心 |
| [06:04] | Guess what I’m doing now. | 猜猜我现在在做什么 |
| [06:06] | – I… – Sometimes when I just look around | -我… -有时候我看看周围 |
| [06:08] | at the life I’ve made, | 看看自己拥有的生活 |
| [06:10] | my husband, my baby, my beautiful house… | 我的丈夫 我的孩子 漂亮的房子 |
| [06:13] | Your total estimated worth of zero dollars. | 以及你数额为0美金的总估值 |
| [06:16] | Your associate’s degree in fitness. | 加上健身专业的副学士学位 |
| [06:18] | This kid just dropped a major dook. | 这孩子刚拉了一大泡屎 |
| [06:20] | I am talking a post Homestyle Buffet widowmaker. | 我指的是惊天地泣鬼神的一大泡屎 |
| [06:23] | – Oh, my… – Mom, I’m a stylist now. | -好臭 -妈 我现在是时装设计师 |
| [06:27] | I read a really long book. | 我看了一本很厚的书 |
| [06:28] | I bought a new underwear. | 我买了一件新内衣 |
| [06:30] | I have a gay friend. | 我有个基佬朋友 |
| [06:31] | – I tricked a dog! – Girls! | -我训练了一条狗表演特技 -孩子们 |
| [06:33] | Girls, you don’t have to compete for my attention. | 乖女儿们 你们不必争宠 |
| [06:37] | I’m never gonna tell you which one I like better. | 我永远不会告诉你们我更喜欢谁 |
| [06:43] | Oh, you haven’t seen the nursery yet. | 你还没去看我们家的婴儿房呢 |
| [06:48] | I am your favorite, though, right? | 不过你最喜欢的肯定是我吧 |
| [06:53] | Let’s just go. | 我们走吧 |
| [06:55] | You can’t just let her win. | 你不能就这样让她赢 |
| [06:58] | This is important to you. | 这对你很重要 |
| [07:00] | Plus I didn’t get my Worldstar video. | 再说我没拍到世界巨星的视频 |
| [07:03] | You’re doing this. | 你必须勇往直前 |
| [07:05] | Thanks, Gretch. | 谢了 格雷琴 |
| [07:07] | You’ve always been such a good… | 你一直对我这么… |
| [07:09] | Hey! What’s up? | 喂 怎么啦 |
| [07:12] | Really? | 真的吗 |
| [07:16] | Yeah. | 好啊 |
| [07:17] | Camping sounds fun. | 露营听起来很有趣 |
| [07:18] | Um, let me just check my schedule. | 我看看我的时间安排 |
| [07:22] | Okay. Bye. | 好 拜 |
| [07:32] | Faye’s the best, isn’t she? | 菲人真好 对不对 |
| [07:33] | Did you check out that dope speaker she gaffled for me? | 你看到她给我弄来的那台酷音响了吗 |
| [07:36] | Seriously, how effing cool is she? | 说真的 她是不是超级酷 |
| [07:39] | Calm down. You’re sweating. | 冷静 你都出汗了 |
| [07:40] | Sorry. | 抱歉 |
| [07:42] | I’ve had a major bone for Faye Cottumaccio | 我一直特别喜欢菲·卡特玛乔 |
| [07:44] | since her old Cinemax movies. | 从她当年演黄暴频道的电影就开始了 |
| [07:46] | Then I discovered Bec has these old home vids. | 后来我发现贝卡还有以前的家庭视频 |
| [07:50] | Faye looks so hot in them. | 里面菲太性感了 |
| [07:51] | You want to check one out? | 你要不要看一个 |
| [07:56] | What’s up? I’m getting kind of de-cranked by your bummer vibes. | 怎么了 你浑身的冷气场都要把我冻抽筋了 |
| [07:59] | Apparently Olivia is begging for me to go camping with them. | 奥利维亚求我跟他们一起去露营 |
| [08:05] | I told Boone we could go down a road. | 我跟布恩说我们可以发展正式关系 |
| [08:07] | And now we are, and I’m just not sure it’s the right move for me. | 现在成真了 我又不确定这样对不对 |
| [08:10] | Duck him. | 放他鸽子 |
| [08:10] | When I get a code blue and I don’t want to go, | 有时医院里急救信号响起 我又不想去 |
| [08:12] | I just fake diarrhea and hide in the morgue. | 就会假装拉肚子 躲在停尸房里 |
| [08:15] | Or… I could let the universe decide for me, | 或者 我可以让宇宙替我做决定 |
| [08:18] | that way nothing’s ever my fault? | 那样一切都不是我的错 |
| [08:20] | Look, it sucks, but more often than not, | 虽然这样让人很不爽 但通常情况下 |
| [08:22] | the key to interpersonal bullroar is simple: | 搞好人际关系的关键很简单 |
| [08:25] | you need to communicate with the other dingus. | 就是要跟对方好好交流 |
| [08:28] | You’re right. | 你说得对 |
| [08:29] | I’m just gonna talk to Boone face-to-face and tell him | 我就当面跟布恩说 |
| [08:31] | I’m not ready for this. | 我还没准备好面对这些 |
| [08:34] | My titty-sucking therapist told me | 我那个吸奶子的贱婊心理医生告诉我 |
| [08:36] | I should be honest with my feelings. | 要直面自己的感情 |
| [08:37] | Yes, this is like how I keep telling everyone | 没错 就像我一直跟大家说 |
| [08:39] | how dangerously exhausted I am, so that eventually someone… | 我现在筋疲力尽 非常危险 这样总有人… |
| [08:43] | Yeah, I’m just gonna text him. | 好了 我这就发短信给他 |
| [08:50] | I told you I don’t to talk about Penny the Penguin anymore | 我说过我不想再聊企鹅佩妮了 |
| [08:54] | she went to the aviary in the sky | 她去了天上的鸟舍 |
| [08:57] | I just want to get this straight. | 我想把话说清楚 |
| [08:58] | Gretchen has the nerve to bring that geriatric | 格雷琴竟然胆敢把那个老男人 |
| [09:02] | and his filthy spawn into my home and then call me to chat?! | 和他的野崽子带来我家 然后还打电话找我聊天 |
| [09:06] | Like lovers? | 像恋人那样 |
| [09:07] | Fam, Fam, what you need to do | 兄弟 你现在需要做的 |
| [09:09] | is get your mind off this girl | 就是别再想那个女孩 |
| [09:11] | and just get out there and bang someone, Fam. | 赶紧出去找别的女人操个逼 兄弟 |
| [09:13] | Yeah, maybe that works for a bro-y man-child like yourself, | 也许这方法对你这种幼稚男人管用 |
| [09:18] | but I am a novelist, | 但我是小说家 |
| [09:20] | and an empath, | 能感受他人之感受 |
| [09:22] | thus, have a heightened sensitivity to the pain of others. | 因此对其他人的痛苦更加敏感 |
| [09:26] | If I were to use someone and make them feel bad, | 如果我利用了别人 让她们难过 |
| [09:29] | that, in turn, would make me feel bad. | 这样会反过来让我也很难过 |
| [09:32] | Why would you make her feel bad? | 你为什么会让她难过 |
| [09:34] | Two people can want something from each other, | 如果两个人彼此渴望对方身上的东西 |
| [09:36] | and both get it, | 然后都得到满足 |
| [09:37] | and part ways happy. | 开开心心地一拍两散 |
| [09:40] | That’s ridiculous. | 那太荒唐了 |
| [09:44] | Happiness is a finite commodity. | 快乐是有限的资源 |
| [09:46] | You have to steal it from people. | 必须得从别人那里偷来 |
| [09:48] | And I’m just… I’m not the kind of person | 而我…我不是那种 |
| [09:50] | who would mistreat someone like that. | 会像那样辜负别人的人 |
| [09:52] | Edgar! Can you blow your nose or something? | 埃德加 你能不能擤擤鼻涕 |
| [09:54] | There’s a faint whistle every time you breathe. | 你每次呼吸都鼻涕作响 |
| [09:57] | A faint whistle every time I breathe? | 我每次呼吸都鼻涕作响吗 |
| [09:58] | Listen, find a girl who’s down and out, | 听着 找一个落魄潦倒的女孩 |
| [10:00] | take her for a fancy meal and a little compelling conversation, | 带她去吃顿豪华大餐 说点好听的话 |
| [10:05] | and then drop some ropes on her face. | 然后把精液都射到她脸上 |
| [10:07] | You get laid, she learns what truffle fries are. | 你能操到逼 她能知道松露薯条是什么 |
| [10:12] | There is someone I know who fits that bill. | 我还真认识一个这样的女人 |
| [10:15] | Katherine. | 凯瑟琳 |
| [10:16] | She was the saddest girl in Manchester. | 她是曼彻斯特最可悲的姑娘 |
| [10:19] | She moved to L.A. | 她后来搬到洛杉矶 |
| [10:20] | only to work as a waitress at The Fox and Hounds. | 却只能做「狐狸与猎犬酒店」的服务生 |
| [10:23] | Bro, you take her to République, | 兄弟 你带她去共和法国餐厅 |
| [10:25] | my boy Eli will hook you up with that dank sparkling rosé. | 我兄弟伊莱能给你搞到高档玫瑰红酒 |
| [10:30] | Or better yet, invite her here | 或者更好的是 邀请她来这里 |
| [10:32] | and wow her with my architecturally significant house, | 让她惊叹我这建筑风格独特的家 |
| [10:36] | that also contains– what? | 这里还有…你猜什么 |
| [10:38] | A bed! | 一张床 |
| [10:40] | For dropping the aforementioned ropes. | 用来射出你之前说的精液 |
| [10:43] | Great! So, when next I come upstairs, you two will be gone. | 好极了 我再上来的时候 希望你们已经走了 |
| [10:46] | Ah, but we have to finish this movie for work. | 但我们必须看完这部电影 工作需要 |
| [10:50] | I don’t care. Go to… his. | 我并不关心 去他家 |
| [10:52] | Ooh, can’t. I ordered a bunch of oysters off Amazon | 不行 我从亚马逊上订了一些牡蛎 |
| [10:55] | and forget them in my mud room, so… | 放在前厅忘吃了 所以… |
| [10:57] | Well, then go… go watch at Lindsay’s. | 那就去琳赛家看 |
| [11:00] | She does have tons of boxed mac and cheese. | 她家有超多盒装芝士通心粉 |
| [11:02] | Macki and cheesy! Yum town! | 芝士士通心粉粉 好好吃 |
| [11:06] | Does anyone actually find that endearing? | 真的会有人觉得这样可爱吗 |
| [11:09] | I cannot imagine so. | 我无法想象会有 |
| [11:11] | No. | 没有 |
| [11:14] | After Penny died, things were never the same between me and Alan. | 佩妮死后 我和艾伦之间完全变了样 |
| [11:17] | I always said I’d call him tomorrow– who knew that one day | 我总是说明天会联系他 谁会知道 |
| [11:19] | tomorrow would be the day he got sucked into a jet engine? | 某一个明天他会被吸入喷气式发动机 |
| [11:24] | Well, it’s gonna be tough to make this one into a ride. | 要想把这片改编成搞笑的真的很难 |
| [11:29] | Yes! I’m starving. | 终于到了 快饿死了 |
| [11:32] | Edgar? | 埃德加 |
| [11:33] | – R… – Yeah, buddy! | -瑞… -总算来了 小哥 |
| [11:35] | Comida Argentina, por favor. Mi mas gusta. | 拜托是阿根廷美食 我最喜欢的 |
| [11:38] | Oh, thanks a lot. | 非常感谢 |
| [11:43] | It’s nice to see you, Ricky. | 很高兴见到你 瑞克 |
| [11:45] | What was that about? Pretending you don’t know me? | 刚刚算什么 假装不认识我吗 |
| [11:48] | I helped you bury that camel. | 我帮你埋了那只骆驼 |
| [11:49] | Oh, I-it’s just that I… I don’t tell everyone right off | 我只是…我不会见人就说 |
| [11:52] | about my combat experience. | 我的战争经历 |
| [11:53] | They-they see you in a certain way. | 他们会戴着有色眼镜看你 |
| [11:55] | Oh, yeah. | 原来如此 |
| [11:56] | Not that I wouldn’t. He’s a really cool guy. | 并不是我不愿意说 他人挺好的 |
| [11:58] | No, no, no, I get it. | 不不不 我明白 |
| [12:00] | Mm, you don’t want him to see you like some messed-up vet. | 你不想让他把你当成有心理疾病的老兵 |
| [12:03] | Like me. | 就像我这样 |
| [12:05] | No. | 不 |
| [12:07] | No, Ricky, I… | 不 瑞克 我… |
| [12:14] | Delivery foul. | 送餐出错了 |
| [12:15] | Dude forgot your chimichurri for your steak. | 那人忘了给你的牛排配阿根廷青酱 |
| [12:17] | Aw, no, it’s okay. I don’t need it. | 不 算了 我不需要 |
| [12:20] | Bro, it’s his job, okay? I got this. | 兄弟 这是他的工作 我来搞定 |
| [12:31] | Katherine. | 凯瑟琳 |
| [12:33] | You look shockingly presentable. | 你看起来很漂亮 令人有点震惊 |
| [12:35] | Um, thanks. Good to see you. | 谢了 很高兴见到你 |
| [12:38] | Please, come in. | 快请进 |
| [12:43] | I know what you’re going to ask. | 我知道你想问什么 |
| [12:45] | Who designed this breathtaking home? | 谁设计了这惊艳的房子 |
| [12:49] | It’s a Schindler, actually. | 其实是辛德勒大师的作品 |
| [12:52] | It’s very quaint. | 挺独特有趣 |
| [12:54] | You know, I hesitated to call you, | 我之前犹豫着要不要联系你 |
| [12:56] | but as I was recently reminded, | 但有人最近提醒我 |
| [12:58] | there is nothing wrong with two people going into something | 两个人都睁大眼睛 心里明白地做一件事 |
| [13:01] | eyes wide open, each wanting to get something out of it. | 都想从中获得什么 这其实并没错 |
| [13:05] | – Okay. – Even if one person | -好吧 -即使其中一个人 |
| [13:07] | demonstrably has far less to offer than the other. | 能付出的明显比另一个人少 |
| [13:10] | That makes sense. | 有道理 |
| [13:11] | I’ve prepared some of my favorite hors d’oeuvres for us. | 我准备了一些我最喜欢的法式开胃菜 |
| [13:15] | This here… | 这个是… |
| [13:17] | duck pâté. | 鸭肝冻肉 |
| [13:18] | Don’t ask what it is; just enjoy it. | 别问这是什么 享用就好 |
| [13:21] | Are you thirsty? Would you like a drink? | 你渴了吗 想来点喝的吗 |
| [13:23] | I’d like you to try a very special scotch. | 我想让你尝尝这种非常特别的威士忌 |
| [13:28] | It’s called Laga-vul-in. | 名叫拉加…维…林 |
| [13:31] | 16, as in that is how old this is. | 16年份的 |
| [13:34] | Sorry, I just can’t do Lagavulin anymore. | 抱歉 我不想再喝拉加维林了 |
| [13:37] | Do you have any Japanese single malts? | 你这里有日本单一麦芽威士忌吗 |
| [13:39] | Like Hibiki 21? | 响牌21年威士忌 |
| [13:40] | Kendrick Lamar introduced me to it | 我帮歌手肯德里克·拉马尔 |
| [13:42] | when I was doing the deal for his line of bulletproof hats. | 做防弹帽业务时 他带我尝过一次 |
| [13:44] | Wait. Hold on. What’s happening? | 等等 等等 什么情况 |
| [13:47] | I thought… I thought you worked at The Fox and Hounds. | 你不是在「狐狸和猎犬酒店」上班吗 |
| [13:50] | Uh, when I was 22. | 我22岁时是在那里上班 |
| [13:52] | But you know I’m an entertainment lawyer now? | 你知道我现在是娱乐界律师了吧 |
| [13:54] | Come on, Jimmy. | 拜托 吉米 |
| [13:56] | You can tell me. | 你可以告诉我 |
| [13:58] | Whose house is this? | 这是谁的房子 |
| [13:59] | – This is my home. – Okay. How much do you need? | -这就是我家啊 -好吧 你要多少钱 |
| [14:03] | You’re not the first person from home to call me out of the blue | 你不是第一个突然打电话来 |
| [14:06] | and hit me up for money. | 找我要钱的老乡 |
| [14:07] | No, I… | 不 我… |
| [14:09] | I don’t need money. | 我不需要钱 |
| [14:12] | I’m a… I’m a bestselling novelist. | 我可是畅销书作家 |
| [14:15] | You don’t know? | 你不知道吗 |
| [14:16] | Well, then I’m not that much higher status than you. | 这么说我的地位并不比你高多少啦 |
| [14:18] | How are you higher status than me?! | 你的地位怎么可能比我高 |
| [14:24] | Jimmy, you chav! | 吉米 你个小痞子 |
| [14:31] | What was that name we used to call you back home? | 以前在英国的时候我们都叫你什么来着 |
| [14:33] | Oh, oh, I remember– Mouse Boy and Jizz Magnet. | 我记起来了 “鼠仔”和”吸精王” |
| [14:36] | What was the other one? | 还有一个是什么来着 |
| [14:38] | Shitty Jimmy. | “屎吉米” |
| [14:40] | That was it. Shitty Jimmy! | 就是这个 “屎吉米” |
| [14:43] | Oh, my God, I can still remember the song. | 天呐 那歌我都还记得呢 |
| [14:45] | *Shitty Jimmy* | *屎吉米* |
| [14:47] | *Look at Shitty Jimmy* | *快看屎吉米* |
| [14:48] | *Shitty Jimmy with his little shitty…* | *屎吉米和他那…* |
| [14:51] | Wha…? *With his little shitty* | 什么来着 *和他那…* |
| [14:53] | *Little, li… * What was it? Come on. | *小…* 什么词儿来着 快说啊 |
| [14:54] | Come on, what was it? Come on. | 拜托快说啊 是什么来着 |
| [14:56] | *With his little shitty face.* | *和他那张屎逼脸* |
| [14:58] | Yes! *With his little shitty face.* | 没错 *和他那张屎逼脸* |
| [15:01] | Shitty Jimmy! | 屎吉米 |
| [15:03] | *Shitty Jimmy with his little shitty face, whoo!* | *屎吉米和他那张屎逼脸* |
| [15:09] | Ok, I texted him. | 好了 我给他发短信了 |
| [15:11] | “Hey. I’m just not sure | “嗨 我只是还没准备好 |
| [15:14] | I’m ready for camping. Hope that’s okay.” | 一起去露营 但愿这样没关系” |
| [15:16] | Look at you– telling someone what you need. | 瞧瞧你 坦率说出了自己的需求 |
| [15:19] | 布恩: 呼 我也讨厌露营 那我们改去艾斯棕榈泉酒店吧 | |
| [15:23] | Yeah, that’d be fine. | 好 那就这样吧 |
| [15:25] | And I was like, “Sorry you got triggered Snowflakes. | 然后我就说”抱歉 你怒了 雪花 |
| [15:29] | Go back to your ‘safe space.'” | 回你的安全区域去吧” |
| [15:31] | Look, Mommy. | 快来看 妈妈 |
| [15:33] | An important Los Angeles magazine did a piece | 洛杉矶一本重要的杂志专访了 |
| [15:35] | on my boss, Priscilla, and you could see me in the background | 我的老板普莉希拉 背景里你可以看到 |
| [15:38] | with some work friends. | 我和一些工作上的朋友 |
| [15:40] | “Friends”? | “朋友” |
| [15:41] | That’s why not of them showed up at your divorce party. | 所以你的离婚派对他们一个都没来吧 |
| [15:44] | Well, that’s rude. | 真没礼貌 |
| [15:45] | I’ve been hundreds of parties for people I don’t like. | 我就去过几百个我不喜欢的人的派对 |
| [15:47] | Bob Baliban. Heather Locklear. | 鲍勃·巴利班 希瑟·拉克里尔 |
| [15:49] | Stevie Wonder. | 史提夫·汪达 |
| [15:51] | He can see, you know. | 其实他不是盲人 |
| [15:52] | Okay. I have to go get ready for Piloxing. | 好了 我得去准备跳搏击健身舞了 |
| [15:58] | Listen, you backstabbing suck-butt, | 听着 你这个背后捅刀的恶心货 |
| [16:01] | my entire life you have been nothing | 我这一辈子 你都只会 |
| [16:04] | but a source of underminery and hurtful, bitchy faces. | 暗地里搞破坏 伤害我 成天摆张贱人脸 |
| [16:08] | I am not a real person, | 我没有形成健全的人格 |
| [16:09] | and it’s all your fault. | 全是你的错 |
| [16:10] | So, Becca, | 所以 贝卡 |
| [16:12] | my only sister… | 我唯一的姐姐 |
| [16:14] | we are officially through. | 我们正式断绝关系 |
| [16:16] | You’re… seriously gonna stand there, | 你是认真的吗 站在这里 |
| [16:19] | probably softly farting as usual, | 或许还跟往常一样在偷偷放屁 |
| [16:22] | and blame me for your life being an actual 9/11? | 然后把你911灾难般的人生怪罪到我头上 |
| [16:26] | I had the same challenges growing up, and look at me. | 我的成长过程也遇到过同样的挑战 但你看看我 |
| [16:28] | I’m living in a real house with real friends | 我住在像样的房子里 有一群真正的朋友 |
| [16:31] | who aren’t disgusting monsters… | 他们可不是恶心的牛鬼蛇神… |
| [16:34] | and I’m married to a successful doctor. | 我还嫁给了一个成功的医生 |
| [16:36] | Blame me for your life? Uh-uh. | 想让我替你的人生背锅 想都别想 |
| [16:39] | Sorry, peaches. | 抱歉 小可爱 |
| [16:40] | You can try and blame other people, | 你可以试试甩锅给别人 |
| [16:42] | but, like the actual 9/11, | 不过就跟真正的911灾难一样 |
| [16:44] | you did it to yourself. | 都是你自己造成的 |
| [16:53] | Oh, you want a titty twist? | 怎么 想来拧乳头大战吗 |
| [16:54] | I’ll show you a titty twist! | 我来让你见识下真正的拧乳头 |
| [16:58] | – You don’t want none of this! – I’m the titty twist champion! | -你不会想见识我的功力的 -我可是拧乳头冠军 |
| [17:00] | Bitch, I will spray your milk all over this goddamn room! | 贱人 我会让你的奶喷得满屋子都是 |
| [17:03] | Give me a tit, and I’ll twist it raw! | 给我一个乳头 我有本事把它拧脱皮 |
| [17:04] | – It’s gonna be like a dairy. – Girls. | -到时候这儿就成奶厂了 -姑娘们 |
| [17:06] | Girls! | 姑娘们 |
| [17:09] | Shit, shit, shit! Don’t stop yet! | 该死该死 可别停啊 |
| [17:11] | Well, Officer, if you’re gonna search the place, | 长官 如果您需要搜查这里的话 |
| [17:13] | I suggest you start under my sweater. | 我建议您从我的毛衣里开始搜 |
| [17:18] | Am I talking? | 是我在说话吗 |
| [17:21] | Vernon! | 弗南 |
| [17:23] | Oh, shit! | 我操 |
| [17:25] | Vernon, your dumb speaker is | 弗南 你的破音响 |
| [17:27] | blasting filth all over the house! | 在满屋子地散播污言秽语 |
| [17:29] | Turn that off! | 给我关了 |
| [17:31] | Is that… | 那是 |
| [17:33] | Mommy?! | 妈妈吗 |
| [17:34] | G-Get out of here! | 快出去 |
| [17:35] | Jesus, I’m busy! I’m… | 上帝啊 我忙着呢 我… |
| [17:37] | Oh, man, them boobies. | 老天啊 这胸 |
| [17:49] | Worldstar! | 世界巨星 |
| [17:50] | Okay. I’m off to Equinox. | 好了 我去健身房了 |
| [17:55] | I just wanted Mom to think I had everything figured out. | 我只是想让妈妈觉得我过着完美的生活 |
| [17:59] | I didn’t want her to know that we have no money! | 我不想让她知道我们没钱 |
| [18:03] | And that I’m married to | 我还嫁给了一个 |
| [18:04] | a talking penis in a clown wig! | 像戴着小丑假发的行走的鸡巴 |
| [18:14] | My life is shit. | 我的人生烂得跟屎一样 |
| [18:19] | Why do you think I go through a c… | 你以为我每周为什么要… |
| [18:21] | a case of Kendall- Jackson a week? | 喝掉一整箱的红酒 |
| [18:35] | We’re both messed up. | 我们都有严重的问题 |
| [18:38] | Who’s L.D.P.? | LDP是谁 |
| [18:40] | Lou Diamond Phillips. | 卢·戴蒙德·菲利普斯 |
| [18:42] | He played La Bamba. | 他演过《青春传奇》 |
| [18:44] | Mom dated him for, like, three years. | 我妈跟他恋爱过大约三年 |
| [18:46] | He was the best. | 他是最棒的 |
| [18:47] | La Bamba? | 《青春传奇》 |
| [18:53] | I can’t get this bikini to stay on. | 这比基尼老是往下掉 |
| [18:55] | Aftershock. | “高潮余波”来了 |
| [19:04] | Okay, well, how about if two pelicans agree | 好吧 如果有两只鹈鹕 |
| [19:09] | to fill their beaks with rocks and jump into the ocean? | 嘴里塞满石头 然后跳进大海呢 |
| [19:12] | That’s not a parody. | 那可不是恶搞 |
| [19:13] | They actually did that in the movie. | 它们在电影中确实这么做了 |
| [19:17] | It’s open! | 门是开的 |
| [19:20] | Hope this is really delicious. | 但愿这酱真的很美味 |
| [19:21] | I had to pass up three gigs to come back. | 我为了回来送这个不得不推掉三个订单 |
| [19:26] | Thanks for that. | 多谢你了啊 |
| [19:28] | Sorry. | 抱歉 |
| [19:32] | Did you know me and Edgar served in Iraq together? | 你知道我和埃德加一起在伊拉克服过役吗 |
| [19:36] | Apparently he’s real embarrassed | 显然他不好意思 |
| [19:37] | for people to know that he’s a vet. | 让别人知道他曾是个老兵 |
| [19:40] | I guess he thinks he’s better than me. | 大概他自以为他高我一等 |
| [19:43] | But he ain’t shit. | 但他连个屁都算不上 |
| [19:46] | Never was. | 从来都不是 |
| [19:51] | You know what? | 你知道吗 |
| [19:54] | Why don’t you come over here | 你何不过来 |
| [19:55] | and spread this chimichurri sauce on my steak for me? | 替我给这个牛排撒上阿根廷青酱呢 |
| [20:01] | Yeah, that ain’t gonna happen. | 想得美 那是不可能的 |
| [20:05] | You spread that chimichurri on my steak, | 你替我把牛排撒上阿根廷青酱 |
| [20:11] | this 50 is yours and you get a five star rating. | 这50美元就是你的了 还能获得五星评价 |
| [20:13] | You don’t… | 如果你不照做 |
| [20:16] | you get nothing and I give you one star. | 就一分钱都得不到 我还会给你打一星差评 |
| [20:21] | I don’t care either way, | 我不在乎你选哪种 |
| [20:22] | ’cause 50 bucks don’t mean shit to me. | 因为50美元对我来说连屁都算不上 |
| [20:25] | Oh, damn. | 厉害了我的哥 |
| [21:15] | Mom! | 妈 |
| [21:17] | Kids, please, please, | 孩子们 别吵了 别闹 |
| [21:18] | get out of the frame, kids. | 快走出镜头范围 孩子们 |
| [21:19] | Get out of the frame, kids! | 快走出镜头范围 孩子们 |
| [21:20] | Thanks. | 谢了 |
| [21:22] | Faye Cottumaccio reading for the role of Marsha. | 菲·卡特玛乔试读玛莎一角的剧本 |
| [21:26] | Mr. Belvedere, did the agency send you? | 贝弗德尔先生 是公司派你来的吗 |
| [21:30] | Have you guys noticed a pattern? | 你们注意到规律[图案]了吗 |
| [21:32] | It was the ’80s, Gretch. | 那是80年代 格雷琴 |
| [21:33] | You put some triangles and squiggly lines on a shirt | 把三角形和弯弯曲曲的线条印在上衣上 |
| [21:36] | and called it fashion. | 就叫时尚了 |
| [21:38] | Your mother is completely | 在这些录像带中 |
| [21:39] | neglecting you in all these tapes. | 你们的妈妈完全忽略了你们 |
| [21:41] | – Mom! Mom! – She doesn’t give a shit | -妈 妈 -她完全不在乎 |
| [21:44] | about anything you’re doing. | 你们在干的任何事 |
| [21:49] | – Holy shit. – You’re right. | -天啊 -你说得对 |
| [21:52] | It’s Mom’s fault | 都是妈妈的错 |
| [21:53] | you turned out to be a giant toddler with boobs | 你才变成了一个有着大胸的巨婴 |
| [21:55] | and I drink a touch too much here and there. | 而我成了个酒鬼 |
| [21:58] | I am sorry, Becca. | 对不起 贝卡 |
| [22:02] | Me, too. | 我也是 |
| [22:03] | We should tell her we’re the ones who need a break from her. | 我们应该告诉她 是我们要摆脱她 |
| [22:06] | What’s the point? | 有什么意义呢 |
| [22:07] | She’ll just start crying and tell us how she got the clap | 她只会哭泣 然后告诉我们她是怎么被 |
| [22:10] | from the sound guy on Trapper John, M.D. | 《特雷普·约翰医生》里的那演员传染淋病的 |
| [22:13] | Bec. | 贝卡 |
| [22:14] | – Wha…? – The only way our lives | -搞什么 -我们的生活能够 |
| [22:16] | are going to get fixed is if we fix them ourselves. | 走上正轨的唯一办法就是我们采取行动 做出改变 |
| [22:23] | You’re right. | 你说得对 |
| [22:31] | She is. | 她的确说得对 |
| [22:32] | Yo, do you guys mind leaving for a bit? | 你们介意走开吗 |
| [22:35] | I need some sleep. | 我需要睡觉 |
| [22:36] | I closed my eyes to sneeze a little while ago | 我刚刚闭上眼睛打喷嚏 |
| [22:38] | and I woke up eight minutes later. | 再醒来时已经是八分钟后了 |
| [22:44] | What about when we locked you in the school basement | 还有一次我们把你关进了学校地下室 |
| [22:47] | and we wouldn’t let you out | 我们不放你出来 |
| [22:49] | until you put your little willy through the keyhole? | 直到你把你的小鸡鸡从钥匙孔里伸出来 |
| [22:53] | It was so tiny. | 简直跟牙签一样细小 |
| [22:54] | Well, it’s not anymore. | 已经不细小了 |
| [22:56] | It’s bigger now. | 现在大些了 |
| [22:58] | And guess what? | 你猜怎么着 |
| [22:59] | You just blew your chance at ever seeing it. | 你刚刚毁掉了再看到它的机会 |
| [23:03] | Jimmy! | 吉米 |
| [23:04] | Did you think we might shag? | 你本来以为我们可能会上床吗 |
| [23:08] | All right. That’s it! I think we’re done here. | 好了 够了 我觉得没什么好说的了 |
| [23:12] | This was a complete waste of time. | 这简直是浪费时间 |
| [23:14] | I got nothing out of this utter debacle! | 我从这破事中获取不到任何好处 |
| [23:17] | Me, neither. | 我也是 |
| [23:20] | Do you promise it got bigger? | 你保证它变大了吗 |
| [23:57] | Damn it. | 该死的 |
| [24:09] | Seriously, what is wrong with me? | 说真的 我是有什么毛病啊 |