| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:07] | [LOUD SNORING] | |
| [00:25] | AAH! | |
| [00:29] | [SNORING] | |
| [00:33] | UGH! | |
| [00:36] | [ALARM CLOCK BEEPING] | |
| [00:46] | RISE AND SHINE, SLEEPYHEAD. | |
| [00:50] | GOOD MORNING, SWEETNESS. | |
| [00:51] | [YAWNS] HOW DID YOU SLEEP? | |
| [00:54] | OH, LIKE A ROCK. | |
| [00:57] | LIKE A ROCK. MMM. | |
| [01:00] | [WHIMPERS] | |
| [01:39] | DICK, WHAT’S TAKING SO LONG? | |
| [01:42] | I’LL JUST BE A MINUTE. | |
| [01:43] | HEY, ALBRIGHT. WHAT’S WITH THE CAPE? | |
| [01:48] | WHY, TOO MUCH? | |
| [01:49] | WELL, NOT IF YOU’RE FIGHTING CRIME. | |
| [01:52] | FOR YOUR INFORMATION, I THINK I LOOK GREAT. | |
| [01:56] | DICK, I’M GONNA WAIT IN THE CAR, | |
| [01:57] | I WANT TO GO OVER THE SEATING CHART FOR THE FUND-RAISER. | |
| [02:00] | OH, MARY, I LOVE THAT JACKET. | |
| [02:03] | YEAH, THE WAY IT HAS NO BUTTONS | |
| [02:05] | AND FLOWS OFF YOUR SHOULDERS. | |
| [02:07] | IT’S NOT A JACKET, IT’S A CAPE. | |
| [02:09] | OH, OF COURSE. | |
| [02:13] | IF IT’S A CAPE, I DON’T LIKE IT. | |
| [02:17] | SO, UH, WHAT IS THIS THING | |
| [02:18] | YOU’RE GOING TO, ANYWAY? | |
| [02:19] | IT’S A CHARITY AUCTION. | |
| [02:20] | AND WHAT’S CHARITY, AGAIN? | |
| [02:21] | WELL, ALL I KNOW IS THEY’RE GIVING OUT | |
| [02:23] | FREE DRINKS AND PADDLES WITH NUMBERS ON THEM. | |
| [02:27] | WELL, I GUESS THAT’S WHAT CHARITY’S ALL ABOUT, | |
| [02:29] | GETTING LIQUORED UP AND SPANKING YOUR NEIGHBOR. | |
| [02:34] | OH, AND MARY TELLS ME | |
| [02:35] | I’LL GET TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN SOMEONE’S LIFE. | |
| [02:37] | WAIT, I THOUGHT WE WEREN’T ALLOWED | |
| [02:38] | TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE. | |
| [02:39] | NO, WE CAN MAKE LITTLE DIFFERENCES. | |
| [02:40] | WE’RE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE GLOBAL DIFFERENCES. | |
| [02:43] | CAN WE BLOW UP THE EARTH? | |
| [02:46] | YOU SEE, THAT’S A GLOBAL DIFFERENCE. | |
| [02:48] | IT’S SO HARD TO KEEP TRACK OF ALL THIS. | |
| [02:50] | I KNOW, DON’T WE HAVE IT ALL WRITTEN DOWN SOMEPLACE? | |
| [02:52] | YEAH, IT’S ALL IN THE MISSION STATEMENT. | |
| [02:54] | WHERE IS THAT THING, ANYWAY? | |
| [02:55] | WELL, IF ANYBODY’S WONDERING, | |
| [02:56] | I DIDN’T LEAVE IT ON THE BUS. | |
| [02:58] | WELL, WE CAN’T BE ON A MISSION | |
| [03:00] | WITHOUT A MISSION STATEMENT. | |
| [03:01] | YOU GUYS ARE GONNA HAVE TO WRITE UP A NEW ONE. | |
| [03:03] | WHAT? WHY US? | |
| [03:04] | BECAUSE SUBORDINATES MUST DO | |
| [03:05] | WHATEVER THE HIGH COMMANDER SAYS. | |
| [03:09] | BOY, THAT REMINDS ME OF A MISSION STATEMENT | |
| [03:12] | I ONCE READ ON A BUS. | |
| [03:23] | AAH! | |
| [03:25] | I’M OK. | |
| [03:27] | NOTHING TO SEE HERE. | |
| [03:29] | [BANG] Sally: DON? | |
| [03:30] | [BANG] OH, HEY, JIMMY. | |
| [03:34] | WHAT’S GOING ON? | |
| [03:35] | YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO MEET ME FOR LUNCH. | |
| [03:37] | OH, SALLY, I’M SORRY, I FORGOT. | |
| [03:40] | I’VE GOT TO BE HONEST WITH YOU, | |
| [03:42] | I DIDN’T GET MUCH SLEEP LAST NIGHT. | |
| [03:43] | REALLY? I GOT A TON, HONEY. [LAUGHS] | |
| [03:46] | I HEARD. | |
| [03:48] | OH, POOR BABY. OK, YOU KNOW WHAT? | |
| [03:53] | I’M GONNA COME OVER AT 8:00, | |
| [03:55] | AND YOU AND I ARE GONNA GO | |
| [03:57] | STRAIGHT TO BED, MISTER. OK? | |
| [04:01] | SEE YOU, JIMMY. | |
| [04:02] | [BANG] | |
| [04:07] | $60, GOING ONCE, GOING TWICE, | |
| [04:10] | SOLD TO JUDITH DRAPER! | |
| [04:11] | COME ON UP HERE AND PICK UP | |
| [04:13] | YOUR 2-DAY PASS TO THE IROQUOIS FALLS SWEAT LODGE. | |
| [04:16] | YOU DESERVE IT. | |
| [04:17] | JUDITH DRAPER! | |
| [04:21] | OH, BEFORE WE AUCTION OFF OUR NEXT ITEM, | |
| [04:23] | LET’S ALL GIVE A HUGE ROUND OF APPLAUSE | |
| [04:26] | TO THE MAN WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS CHARITY, | |
| [04:29] | FATHER MATTHEW OF THE RUTHEFORD BOYS’ HOME. | |
| [04:31] | FATHER MATTHEW! | |
| [04:36] | NOBODY EVER CLAPS LIKE THAT FOR ME. | |
| [04:38] | MAYBE IF YOU OPENED YOUR WALLET, | |
| [04:39] | YOU CHEAP BASTARD. | |
| [04:42] | NEXT, WE HAVE THIS OIL PAINTING | |
| [04:45] | OF THE HISTORIC GROUND BREAKING | |
| [04:47] | OF THE RUTHEFORD BOYS’ HOME. | |
| [04:49] | ISN’T THIS BEAUTIFUL? | |
| [04:50] | WE’LL START THE BIDDING AT $500. | |
| [04:52] | WHO WILL GIVE ME $500? | |
| [04:53] | I HAVE 5, WHO WILL GIVE ME 6? | |
| [04:54] | NOBODY GIVE HIM 6! | |
| [04:55] | 6 FROM FATHER MATTHEW, WHO WILL GIVE ME 7? | |
| [04:59] | 7! IN YOUR FACE, PADRE! | |
| [05:02] | 7, 7’s THE BID. NOW, DO I HEAR 8? 8, ANYONE? | |
| [05:06] | 800. | |
| [05:07] | STRUDWICK! | |
| [05:09] | YOU’RE NOT GONNA LET HIM | |
| [05:11] | WALK AWAY WITH THIS LITTLE BEAUTY FOR 8, ARE YOU? | |
| [05:13] | I SHOULD SAY NOT. 900! | |
| [05:14] | TOP THAT, STRUDWICK. | |
| [05:16] | $1,000. | |
| [05:18] | OH, THAT IS MORE. | |
| [05:20] | YOU’RE OUT OF YOUR LEAGUE, SOLOMON. | |
| [05:22] | AM I? 1,100. | |
| [05:24] | 12. 1,201. | |
| [05:26] | 13! 14! | |
| [05:27] | 15! 16! | |
| [05:28] | [WHOOPING] 17! | |
| [05:32] | $1,700. YOU’RE NOT GONNA LET HIM HAVE IT | |
| [05:36] | FOR $1,700, ARE YOU? | |
| [05:38] | YES. | |
| [05:41] | 17, THEN, GOING ONCE, GOING TWICE, | |
| [05:43] | SOLD TO DICK SOLOMON. | |
| [05:50] | OH, THANK YOU. | |
| [05:51] | ALL I CAN SAY IS… | |
| [05:54] | UH, CLAP LOUDER! | |
| [06:01] | OK, MISSION STATEMENT. | |
| [06:03] | MISSION STATEMENT. | |
| [06:06] | WHAT IS OUR MISSION? | |
| [06:08] | WELL, YOU KNOW, I ALWAYS REMEMBER IT | |
| [06:10] | BY OUR MISSION SONG. | |
| [06:11] | OH, RIGHT, RIGHT. YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. | |
| [06:12] | * ACROSS THE VOID WE COME A-WARPING * | |
| [06:20] | * DUM DIDDLE DEE LEE OOH OOH OOH OOH OOH * | |
| [06:24] | * GLORIOUS AND SOMETHING SOMETHING * | |
| [06:28] | * DUM DIDDLE DEE LEE YADDA YADDA * | |
| [06:30] | SPACESHIP! RIGHT. | |
| [06:34] | OK, LET’S JUST START FROM SCRATCH THEN. | |
| [06:36] | WHAT IS OUR MISSION? | |
| [06:37] | TO BOLDLY GO WHERE NO MAN HAS GONE BEFORE. | |
| [06:42] | THAT’S CLUNKY. | |
| [06:43] | YEAH, AND THAT EXCLUDES SALLY. | |
| [06:44] | MMM, AND US, TOO, TECHNICALLY, SINCE WE’RE NOT MEN. | |
| [06:47] | YEAH, YEAH, AND LOTS OF MEN HAVE BEEN HERE. | |
| [06:50] | YEAH. | |
| [06:54] | EH, LET’S PUT IT IN. | |
| [06:55] | YEAH, IT’LL GIVE DICK SOMETHING TO CUT. | |
| [06:57] | RIGHT. | |
| [07:01] | WELL, THAT’S THE NEWS. | |
| [07:03] | UM-HMM. | |
| [07:05] | I’D REALLY BETTER GET SOME SLEEP. | |
| [07:07] | OK, I’LL GO BRUSH MY TEETH. | |
| [07:09] | WELL, ACTUALLY, SALLY, | |
| [07:11] | I THINK I SHOULD SLEEP ALONE TONIGHT. | |
| [07:14] | WHY? | |
| [07:15] | BECAUSE I MIGHT GET CALLED OUT TO A 480 AT THE 212. | |
| [07:20] | A FIRE AT THE FIRE DEPARTMENT? | |
| [07:24] | ALL RIGHT, SALLY, I’LL BE STRAIGHT WITH YOU. | |
| [07:26] | UH, I CAN’T SLEEP IN THE SAME BED WITH YOU. | |
| [07:30] | IS IT ‘CAUSE I STINK? | |
| [07:31] | NO. | |
| [07:34] | DROOL? | |
| [07:35] | NO. | |
| [07:36] | PEE KIND OF ORANGEY? | |
| [07:37] | NO! | |
| [07:39] | WELL, THEN, WHAT IS IT? | |
| [07:41] | YOU SNORE, SALLY. | |
| [07:42] | SNORE? I DO NOT SNORE. | |
| [07:46] | GIRLS DO NOT SNORE. | |
| [07:49] | WELL, YOU DO. | |
| [07:50] | YOU MEAN, LIKE… [SNORTS] | |
| [07:53] | NO, IT’S MORE LIKE… [SNORTS LOUDLY] | |
| [07:59] | OH, THAT’S BAD. | |
| [08:10] | JUDITH. | |
| [08:11] | DICK. | |
| [08:14] | DID YOU SAY SOMETHING ABOUT MY PAINTING? | |
| [08:17] | NO. OH. | |
| [08:19] | YOU’RE NOT GOING TO HANG | |
| [08:21] | THAT UP IN HERE, ARE YOU? | |
| [08:22] | UH, NO, NINA. THIS IS NOT A HANGING PAINTING. | |
| [08:24] | IT’S MORE OF A WALKING AROUND PAINTING. | |
| [08:28] | OH, THAT’S NICE. WHY DON’T YOU TAKE IT FOR A WALK? | |
| [08:32] | GOOD MORNING. | |
| [08:36] | MARY, I THOUGHT YOUR KIND | |
| [08:38] | DIDN’T VENTURE OUT IN DAYLIGHT. | |
| [08:42] | WELL, IF MY CAPE IS TOO HIP FOR THE ROOM, | |
| [08:44] | MAYBE I’LL JUST TAKE IT OFF. | |
| [08:47] | I LOVE MY PAINTING. IT’S SO NICE. | |
| [08:52] | HERE’S YOUR MAIL. | |
| [08:53] | OH, SOMETHING FROM THE BOYS’ HOME. | |
| [08:57] | AH, AT LAST, THE RESPECT THAT I DESERVE. | |
| [09:01] | “DEAR SIR OR MADAM…” | |
| [09:04] | HEY, THEY’VE INVITED ME TO BECOME A PATRON. | |
| [09:06] | NOT EVERYBODY GETS THAT. | |
| [09:08] | I DID. | |
| [09:08] | ME, TOO. I GOT 3. | |
| [09:12] | THIS PAINTING SUCKS! | |
| [09:21] | STRUDWICK. | |
| [09:23] | DICK. | |
| [09:24] | LET ME GET RIGHT TO IT. | |
| [09:25] | LAST NIGHT, I COULDN’T SLEEP | |
| [09:27] | KNOWING THAT I HAD TAKEN FROM YOU | |
| [09:29] | A PAINTING THAT IS NEAR AND DEAR TO YOUR HEART. | |
| [09:31] | THAT’S WHY I’M WILLING TO LET YOU HAVE IT– | |
| [09:33] | I DON’T WANT IT. | |
| [09:36] | YOU DIDN’T LET ME FINISH. THAT’S WHY I’M WILLING | |
| [09:38] | TO LET YOU HAVE IT FOR, SAY, $900. | |
| [09:43] | FORGET IT. I NEVER WANTED | |
| [09:44] | THAT PIECE OF CRAP, ANYWAY. | |
| [09:45] | OH, REALLY? THEN WHY DID YOU BID ON IT | |
| [09:48] | LIKE A YOUNG LION IN SPRINGTIME? | |
| [09:51] | TO DRIVE UP THE PRICE AND PISS YOU OFF. | |
| [09:56] | WELL, IT DIDN’T WORK! | |
| [09:59] | OK, LET’S START AGAIN. | |
| [10:00] | WE’LL BEGIN THE BIDDING AT, SAY, $900. | |
| [10:03] | GET LOST. THAT WAS A BID. | |
| [10:04] | THAT WAS NOT A BID. | |
| [10:05] | IT WAS, TOO. YOU BID $900. | |
| [10:06] | GOING ONCE, GOING TWICE. GO AWAY! | |
| [10:08] | SOLD! YOU OWE ME $900. | |
| [10:11] | WE’LL CALL IT 8. | |
| [10:13] | 7, AND I GET TO KISS YOUR WIFE. | |
| [10:15] | OUT, IDIOT! | |
| [10:16] | FINE, BUT AT LEAST I HAVE SOMETHING | |
| [10:19] | TO SHOW FOR MY IDIOCY. | |
| [10:24] | AHA! SO, YOU HAVE MY PAINTING. | |
| [10:34] | [SNORING] | |
| [10:38] | SHE SNORES LIKE A PIG. | |
| [10:41] | WHY IS THIS OUR PROBLEM, AGAIN? | |
| [10:42] | WELL, READ THE FIRST PARAGRAPH | |
| [10:43] | OF OUR MISSION STATEMENT. | |
| [10:44] | MMM. “WE MUST CONFRONT ALL HUMAN PROBLEMS | |
| [10:47] | TO UNDERSTAND THE HUMAN EXPERIENCE.” | |
| [10:49] | WHO WROTE THIS CRAP? | |
| [10:51] | THAT WAS YOU. | |
| [10:52] | IT’S GOOD. UM-HMM. | |
| [10:54] | WELL, MAYBE IF WE CONSTRICT | |
| [10:56] | THE AIRFLOW TO HER NOSTRILS. | |
| [10:59] | YEAH. | |
| [11:01] | [SNORES LOUDLY] | |
| [11:03] | UH, BETTER DO THE MOUTH, TOO. | |
| [11:05] | OK. YEAH. I’LL JUST… | |
| [11:14] | ALL RIGHT! YEAH! | |
| [11:15] | SOMETIMES, THE MOST OBVIOUS SOLUTION | |
| [11:17] | IS THE MOST BRILLIANT. YEAH. | |
| [11:20] | NO MORE SNORING, AND SHE GETS | |
| [11:22] | ALL THE OXYGEN SHE NEEDS | |
| [11:23] | THROUGH HER, UH… | |
| [11:26] | WAIT, WHERE’S THE THIRD INTAKE AGAIN? | |
| [11:29] | THE GILLS? | |
| [11:32] | AAH! | AAH! |
| [11:33] | AAH! | |
| [11:36] | WHAT HAPPENED? | |
| [11:37] | NOTHING. | NOTHING. |
| [11:39] | OK. | |
| [11:40] | SO, UM, HOW’D I DO? | |
| [11:43] | PISS POOR! | |
| [11:50] | HI, RUTHEFORD CLOTHING DRIVE? | |
| [11:52] | YEAH, I DONATED A DELIGHTFUL CAPE ENSEMBLE THIS MORNING, | |
| [11:55] | AND I THINK YOU MADE A MISTAKE ON THE RECEIPT. | |
| [11:59] | YEAH, YOU ESTIMATED THE VALUE AT $300. | |
| [12:02] | WELL, I PAID MUCH MORE THAN THAT. | |
| [12:05] | I KNOW THEY HAVEN’T BEEN POPULAR | |
| [12:06] | SINCE THE 1800’S. LOOK… | |
| [12:08] | IF I PUT A ONE IN FRONT OF THE 3, | |
| [12:11] | WOULD THAT BE AGAINST YOUR RULES? | |
| [12:13] | “DEAR FRIEND OF THE ENVIRONMENT.” | |
| [12:15] | GREAT. ALL OF A SUDDEN, | |
| [12:17] | EVERY CHARITY IN THE WORLD | |
| [12:18] | IS ASKING ME FOR MONEY. | |
| [12:19] | WELL, ONCE YOU GET ON ONE CHARITY’S MAILING LIST, | |
| [12:22] | YOU’RE ON THEM ALL. | |
| [12:23] | YEAH, BUT, HOW ARE YOU SUPPOSED | |
| [12:24] | TO JUDGE WHO GETS PRIORITY? | |
| [12:27] | DO I ADOPT A FRUIT BAT, | |
| [12:29] | SAVE THE RAINFOREST, OR BUILD SHELTERS | |
| [12:32] | FOR AMERICA’S HOMELESS? | |
| [12:34] | YOU JUST HELP THE ONES YOU CAN, DICK. | |
| [12:36] | YEAH, BUT WHY ME? | |
| [12:38] | WHY CAN’T THEY JUST HELP EACH OTHER? | |
| [12:41] | AND HOW WOULD THEY DO THAT? | |
| [12:43] | SIMPLE. THE RAINFOREST GUYS CUT DOWN THE JUNGLE | |
| [12:45] | TO BUILD AFFORDABLE HOUSING, | |
| [12:47] | AMERICA’S HOMELESS MOVES IN, | |
| [12:48] | AND ONCE THEY GET SETTLED, | |
| [12:49] | THEY’LL BE HAPPY TO OPEN THEIR HOMES TO FRUIT BATS. | |
| [12:55] | IT’S NOT ROCKET SCIENCE. | |
| [12:58] | THAT’S NOT HOW IT WORKS. | |
| [13:00] | OH, I KNOW HOW IT WORKS. | |
| [13:02] | I FORK OVER $1,700, AND ALL I GET | |
| [13:04] | IS A PAINTING OF 2 MONKS AND A SHOVEL. | |
| [13:07] | THE GUY COULDN’T EVEN PAINT HANDS. | |
| [13:09] | THEY LOOK LIKE POTATOES. | |
| [13:12] | I WANT MY MONEY BACK! | |
| [13:25] | DON. | |
| [13:26] | HARRIET TUBMAN. | |
| [13:29] | DON. | |
| [13:31] | SALLY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? | |
| [13:33] | I FINALLY FOUND A CURE FOR MY SNORING. | |
| [13:36] | OH. | |
| [13:39] | ISN’T THAT GREAT? | |
| [13:39] | I WON’T BE WAKING YOU UP ANYMORE. | |
| [13:41] | YEAH, THAT’S SUPER. GOOD NIGHT. | |
| [13:44] | GOOD NIGHT. | |
| [13:55] | [HUMMING] | |
| [14:01] | AREN’T YOU GONNA GO TO SLEEP? | |
| [14:03] | OH, NO. I SLEPT ALL DAY. | |
| [14:07] | WHY IS THAT? | |
| [14:09] | SO MY SNORING WOULDN’T WAKE YOU UP, SILLY. | |
| [14:12] | NOW GO BACK TO SLEEP. SHH SHH SHH SHH. OK. ALL RIGHT. | |
| [14:26] | Cliff: HEY THERE, WOODY, WHAT’S THAT HAIR DOING IN MY BEER? | |
| [14:29] | Woody: I THINK IT’S THE BACKSTROKE, MR. CLAVIN. | |
| [14:33] | [LAUGHS LOUDLY] | |
| [14:33] | SALLY! | |
| [14:35] | UH, I’LL JUST, I’LL PUT IT ON CLOSED CAPTIONING. | |
| [14:41] | NORM! | |
| [14:42] | SALLY! | |
| [15:07] | STINKY. | |
| [15:14] | YUMMY. | |
| [15:24] | OH, MY GOSH. | OH, MY GOSH. |
| [15:28] | OK, OK. | |
| [15:34] | OK, I’M JUST GONNA TAKE THE PILLOW AWAY. | |
| [15:40] | COME ON. | |
| [15:41] | [BOTH GRUNT] | |
| [15:42] | AAH! | |
| [15:47] | WILL YOU JUST GO TO SLEEP? | |
| [15:49] | CAN’T YOU JUST GO TO SLEEP? | |
| [15:53] | I’M SORRY. DON’T BE MAD. | |
| [15:54] | ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. | |
| [15:55] | I’M SORRY. REALLY SORRY. OK? | |
| [15:59] | [SNORING] | |
| [16:09] | ALL RIGHT, LET’S BRING THIS MISSION STATEMENT HOME. | |
| [16:12] | HOW WILL WE KNOW WHEN WE’VE FULFILLED THE GOAL OF OUR MISSION? | |
| [16:15] | UM, WHEN WE’VE BECOME THE PERFECT HUMAN BEINGS? | |
| [16:19] | YES. YES, BUT HUMAN BEINGS BY NATURE ARE IMPERFECT. | |
| [16:23] | WAIT A SECOND. I SEE WHAT YOU’RE GOING FOR. | |
| [16:26] | YES, AND FOR THIS MISSION TO BE PERFECT, | |
| [16:28] | IT ACTUALLY HAS TO BE REALLY FLAWED. | |
| [16:31] | WELL, ALL RIGHT! IT ALREADY IS. | |
| [16:33] | I MEAN, LOOK AT YOU. | |
| [16:35] | YOU’RE THE POSTER BOY FOR IMPERFECTION. | |
| [16:41] | HOW’S THAT? | |
| [16:42] | WELL, YOUR B.O. SMELLS LIKE CHICKEN SOUP, | |
| [16:45] | AND YOU GOT B.O. A LOT. | |
| [16:48] | FAIR ENOUGH, BUT, UH, | |
| [16:50] | DON’T SELL YOURSELF SHORT | |
| [16:51] | IN THE IMPERFECTION DEPARTMENT, HARRY. | |
| [16:52] | HOW DO YOU MEAN? | |
| [16:54] | YOU’RE NOT SMART. | |
| [16:56] | AND YOU SCARE AWAY THE LADIES. | |
| [17:00] | I FEEL LIKE PUNCHING YOUR FACE IN. | |
| [17:02] | ME FIRST, FATSO. | |
| [17:13] | FATHER MATTHEW WILL BE RIGHT WITH YOU. | |
| [17:15] | THANK YOU. | |
| [17:22] | FATHER MATTHEW, ALLOW ME TO BE PERFECTLY FRANK. | |
| [17:27] | I AM NOT A WEALTHY MAN. | |
| [17:29] | I HAVE TO FEED AND CLOTHE A FAMILY OF 4 | |
| [17:32] | ON A PROFESSOR’S MODEST SALARY. | |
| [17:34] | I CAN’T EXPECT A PRIEST TO UNDERSTAND POVERTY, | |
| [17:38] | BUT LET ME TELL YOU, I HAVE TO MAKE | |
| [17:43] | A LOT OF SACRIFICES– | |
| [17:44] | NO, NO, PLEASE, LET ME FINISH. | |
| [17:47] | I SIMPLY HAVE NO ROOM IN MY LIMITED BUDGET | |
| [17:49] | FOR EXTRAVAGANCES LIKE CHARITY. | |
| [17:51] | THEREFORE, I AM RETURNING THIS PAINTING, | |
| [17:53] | AND I WANT YOU TO GIVE ME MY MONEY BACK. | |
| [17:56] | UNHAND ME, SIR! | |
| [17:58] | GOOD MORNING. | |
| [17:59] | OH, UH, FATHER MATTHEW. | |
| [18:00] | WELL, I’M SORRY TO KEEP YOU WAITING. | |
| [18:03] | BEN, THIS IS DR. SOLOMON, THE NICE MAN | |
| [18:06] | WHO GAVE US THE MONEY TO HAVE THE BUS FIXED. | |
| [18:08] | THANK YOU, DR. SOLOMON. | |
| [18:09] | OH, WELL, HEY, YOU’RE VERY WELCOME. | |
| [18:13] | THANKS TO YOUR GENEROUS PLEDGE, | |
| [18:15] | WE CAN FIX THE BUS, AND OUR KIDS | |
| [18:18] | WILL SEE THINGS THEY HAVE NEVER SEEN BEFORE. | |
| [18:21] | THE TIRE AND RUBBER WORKS IN AKRON, | |
| [18:25] | THE MINIATURE GOLF HALL OF FAME, | |
| [18:29] | WAPAKONETA, THE HOME– | |
| [18:31] | THE BIRTHPLACE OF NEIL ARMSTRONG, | |
| [18:33] | AND OF COURSE, THE AIR AND SPACE MUSEUM, | |
| [18:36] | AND THE AQUARIUM. | |
| [18:38] | OH, YES, AQUARIUMS ARE NICE, IF YOU LIKE FISH, BUT– | |
| [18:41] | AND THERE’S ALSO A CHANCE WE CAN | |
| [18:42] | TAKE A DAY TRIP TO SEE THE TOLEDO MUD HENS. | |
| [18:46] | NOW, THAT’S ALL VERY WELL, FATHER MATTHEW– | |
| [18:50] | ALLOW ME TO BE PERFECTLY FRANK. | |
| [18:53] | I KNOW YOU ARE NOT A WEALTHY MAN. | |
| [18:55] | NO, I–I WAS GOING TO SAY THAT– | |
| [18:57] | AND I KNOW IT WASN’T EASY | |
| [18:58] | RAISING A FAMILY OF 4 | |
| [19:00] | ON A PROFESSOR’S MODEST SALARY– | |
| [19:02] | YEAH, THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I– | |
| [19:03] | WHICH IS WHY YOUR GENEROSITY MEANS SO MUCH TO US. | |
| [19:08] | OH, WELL… | |
| [19:11] | BUT– | |
| [19:11] | NO, NO, PLEASE. LET ME FINISH. | |
| [19:14] | GIVEN YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES, | |
| [19:16] | YOUR GIFT MEANS SO MUCH TO US. | |
| [19:20] | SURE, MARTIN ABEND GAVE US $50,000, | |
| [19:22] | BUT HE OWNS THE BALL BEARING PLANT. | |
| [19:25] | RELATIVE TO HIM, YOUR GIFT WAS FAR MORE GENEROUS. | |
| [19:29] | YOU MEAN, I’M BETTER THAN THE RICH GUY? | |
| [19:32] | WELL, I WOULDN’T WANT TO SAY THAT– | |
| [19:34] | NO, NO, NO, GO ON, SAY IT. | |
| [19:35] | I’M NOT GONNA TELL HIM. | |
| [19:38] | YOU ARE A GREAT MAN. | |
| [19:40] | THANK YOU, FATHER MATTHEW. YOU’RE SO RIGHT. | |
| [19:44] | SO, WHY DID YOU BRING IN THE PAINTING? | |
| [19:47] | OH, THAT. BECAUSE I WANT YOU TO, UH… | |
| [19:51] | UH, I WANT YOU TO… | |
| [19:55] | I WANT YOU TO HAVE IT. | |
| [19:56] | THANK YOU. | |
| [19:57] | NO, NO, PLEASE. THE PLEASURE’S MINE. | |
| [20:00] | NOW, IF YOU’LL EXCUSE ME. | |
| [20:10] | COULD YOU EITHER GET THIS KID OFF MY LEG, | |
| [20:12] | OR ELSE PUT ANOTHER ONE ON, | |
| [20:14] | BECAUSE IT’S REALLY THROWING OFF MY BALANCE. | |
| [20:21] | “THERE ARE SOME THINGS IN LIFE MONEY CAN’T BUY. | |
| [20:24] | FOR EVERYTHING ELSE, THERE’S THIS MISSION STATEMENT.” | |
| [20:28] | THAT’S YOUR CONCLUSION TO THE MISSION STATEMENT? | |
| [20:32] | YEP. IT WAS BETWEEN THAT OR | |
| [20:34] | DOUBLE “A”, AHNK AHNK, MC MISSION STATEMENT. | |
| [20:38] | DID YOU GUYS JUST GET BORED | |
| [20:40] | AND START WATCHING TELEVISION? | |
| [20:41] | NO. YEAH. | |
| [20:45] | YOU KNOW, IT’S WEIRD. UNTIL I STARTED SNORING, | |
| [20:48] | I NEVER REALLY APPRECIATED | |
| [20:50] | HOW MUCH DON LOVES ME. | |
| [20:52] | YEAH, AND UNTIL I STARTED GIVING, | |
| [20:53] | I NEVER REALLY APPRECIATED HOW MUCH I HAVE. | |
| [20:56] | MAN, WE’RE SO LUCKY. | |
| [20:58] | * ACROSS THE VOID WE COME A-WARPING * | |
| [21:02] | * ACROSS THE FIELDS OF STARS WE SOAR * | |
| [21:07] | * WE PLEDGE TO LAND AND SOMETHING, SOMETHING * | |
| [21:12] | * DUM DEE DUM DEE DA DA DA DA…SPACESHIP * | |
| [21:16] | ONE MORE TIME! | |
| [21:17] | * ACROSS THE VOID WE COME A-WARPING * |