| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:05] | – Good morning. – Bite me. | -早上好 -好个屁 |
| [00:09] | What’s your problem? | 你哪根筋不对 |
| [00:11] | Okay, here’s the thing. | 是这样的 |
| [00:12] | I am so happy you found love, | 我很高兴你找到真爱 |
| [00:14] | and I’m glad Adam feels comfortable enough | 我也很高兴亚当感觉很自在 |
| [00:16] | to spend the night here. | 愿意在这里过夜 |
| [00:17] | But you got to know, I can hear every thing you do | 但你得知道 你们做的一切我都能听到 |
| [00:20] | all freakin’ night long. | 整整一晚 |
| [00:24] | Everything? | 一切吗 |
| [00:25] | Yes, you ass-slapping fool, everything. | 对 打屁屁的笨蛋 所有都听到了 |
| [00:29] | I’m so sorry. | 真是对不起 |
| [00:30] | Just keep in mind that our apartment has thin walls | 要记住 咱家的墙很薄 |
| [00:33] | and your daughter’s insurance doesn’t cover therapy. | 你女儿的医保中不包括心理治疗 |
| [00:37] | Did you try the noise-canceling headphones I got you? | 你有戴我给你准备的噪音消除耳机吗 |
| [00:39] | Oh, yeah, right away. | 收到就戴了 |
| [00:41] | And they’re great for airplanes and garbage trucks, | 对飞机和垃圾车的嗓音都管用 |
| [00:44] | but no match for my mother announcing | 但是无法匹敌我妈大声宣布 |
| [00:46] | that she’s been a bad girl and needs to take her medicine. | 她不乖 需要吃药 |
| [00:52] | To be fair, I was pretty naughty. | 公平来讲 我相当淘气 |
| [00:55] | Just so you know, I’m waiting for you guys | 提醒一下 我在等你们 |
| [00:57] | to wrap this up so I can get some coffee. | 结束这个话题 我才能来喝咖啡 |
| [00:59] | Oh, God, get in here. | 老天 进来吧 |
| [01:02] | Sorry you had to hear all that. | 抱歉让你听到这些 |
| [01:04] | Right back at you. | 彼此彼此 |
| [01:06] | No, no, no, no, this is good. | 不不 这样很好 |
| [01:08] | We’re all adults, we can have a conversation about physical love | 我们都是成年人 我们可以就身体之爱进行交谈 |
| [01:10] | and the noises that… | 还有随之发生的 |
| [01:13] | ensue. | 嗓音 |
| [01:15] | How about we just say we’ll be quiet and move on? | 不如我们说我们会保持安静 忘了这事 |
| [01:17] | – Thank you. – Changing the subject. | -谢谢 -改变话题 |
| [01:19] | – Please. – You got plans this weekend? | -快 -你周末有安排吗 |
| [01:22] | Just library sex, why? | 图书馆性爱 怎么了 |
| [01:25] | My friend Mitch and his wife are coming up to Napa. | 我朋友米奇和他老婆来纳帕了 |
| [01:28] | I was thinking it’s about time my best buddy met my best girl. | 我想也是时候我最好的兄弟见见我最爱的女人 |
| [01:31] | That sounds great, set it up. | 真不错 你安排 |
| [01:34] | All right. | 好 |
| [01:34] | Is this the Mitch who directed the movie you worked on? | 你之前参与的电影 是他导演的吗 |
| [01:37] | Yeah, but we go way back. | 是 但我们早就认识了 |
| [01:38] | He’s the closest thing I have to a brother. | 他是最像我兄弟的人 |
| [01:40] | Well, that’s saying something ’cause you have a brother. | 话里有话 因为你本来就有兄弟 |
| [01:43] | I’m gonna call him. | 我给他打电话 |
| [01:44] | You’re gonna love him. | 你会喜欢他的 |
| [01:49] | Meeting the best friend, that’s serious. | 和死党见面 很认真哦 |
| [01:52] | I know. I’m a little nervous. | 我知道 我有点紧张 |
| [01:53] | You should be; if the best friend doesn’t like you, | 你应该紧张 如果这死党不喜欢你 |
| [01:56] | you’re back to slapping your own ass. | 你就要去过自己打屁屁的日子了 |
| [02:19] | I’d lend you my crystal stemware, | 我也想把水晶杯具借你 |
| [02:21] | but I’m afraid in your apartment | 但恐怕在你家 |
| [02:22] | it would just look stolen. | 看上去会像是偷来的 |
| [02:26] | Besides fondue, | 除了芝士火锅外 |
| [02:27] | what are you planning on serving these people? | 你还打算上些什么菜 |
| [02:29] | I don’t know. Christy? | 我不知道 克丽丝蒂 |
| [02:31] | Depends on what they’re throwing away at the restaurant. | 要看餐厅里扔掉些什么 |
| [02:35] | You don’t seem really prepared for this. | 你看起来没准备好 |
| [02:36] | I’m not; I’ve never had a boyfriend | 我没有 我交过的男友中 |
| [02:38] | who wanted to introduce me to anybody. | 没一个要把我介绍给任何人的 |
| [02:40] | Not even during a three-way. | 甚至在3P过程中都不介绍 |
| [02:43] | I had a boyfriend introduce me to his best friend, | 我有个男友曾把我介绍给他的死党 |
| [02:45] | then he married him. | 然后他们结婚了 |
| [02:48] | Do you need a bread maker? I’ve got three. | 你们需要面包机吗 我有三台 |
| [02:51] | I wasn’t gonna make bread. | 我没打算做面包 |
| [02:52] | Do they expect me to make bread? | 他们会指望我做面包吗 |
| [02:54] | What are you gonna dip in the fondue? | 否则用什么蘸芝士火锅 |
| [02:55] | I was just gonna buy bread. | 我打算买面包的 |
| [02:56] | Bonnie, these are Hollywood people. | 邦妮 他们来自好莱坞 |
| [02:59] | They are not gonna eat bread out of a bag. | 他们不会吃袋装的面包 |
| [03:05] | You know what, this is too much pressure. | 知道吗 压力太大了 |
| [03:06] | I’m just gonna break up with Adam. | 我要和亚当分手 |
| [03:08] | Relax, I’m sure you can pretend to be a good person | 淡定 我相信你可以扮好人 |
| [03:11] | long enough for them to like you. | 一直扮到他们喜欢你 |
| [03:14] | And if it goes well with the friends, | 如果和朋友相处融洽 |
| [03:15] | he’ll probably want to introduce you to his parents. | 他可能会带你见家长 |
| [03:18] | That’ll be fun. | 真有意思 |
| [03:19] | “Mom, Dad, | 妈 爸 |
| [03:20] | “I’d like you to meet my girlfriend, Bonnie. | 这是我女友邦妮 |
| [03:22] | “She’s sober a year and a half, | 她戒酒一年半了 |
| [03:24] | but you still might want to hide the Nyquil” | 但你们还是要把感冒药藏起来 |
| [03:27] | I look forward to when you fall in love. | 我相当期待你坠入爱河的那一天 |
| [03:30] | My plan is to wait till you’re dead. | 我的计划是等你死了再说 |
| [03:41] | Whoa, look at that. | 瞧瞧 |
| [03:44] | – Baby, this is awesome. – Thank you. | -亲爱的 太棒了 -谢谢 |
| [03:47] | Jill said presentation is all about levels. | 吉尔说桌上卖相最重要的就是层次 |
| [03:51] | And check this out, a crystal bowl for the olive pits, | 看 装橄榄核的水晶碗 |
| [03:54] | so you don’t have to spit ’em in your hand. | 这样不用吐在手中 |
| [03:57] | What’s that thing in the middle? | 那中间的是什么 |
| [03:58] | Fondue, or as you might know it, | 芝士火锅 你也许听过 |
| [04:02] | hot cheese. | 热芝士 |
| [04:04] | Hey, look, it’s Martha Stewart. | 瞧 玛莎·斯图尔特[家政女王] |
| [04:06] | We have both been in jail. | 我们都坐过牢 |
| [04:09] | Oh, God, please don’t tell them that. | 老天 请别告诉他们 |
| [04:11] | Unless they’d think it’s cool. | 除非他们觉得蹲监狱很酷 |
| [04:12] | Oh, don’t worry about it, | 别担心 |
| [04:14] | Mitch and Leanne are just regular people. | 米奇和琳恩只是普通人 |
| [04:16] | So what are your plans? | 你们有什么安排 |
| [04:17] | Well, we’re gonna hit a couple of wineries, | 我们等下要去一些酒庄 |
| [04:19] | and then we’re going out for dinner. | 然后去吃晚餐 |
| [04:20] | Wine tasting– that ought to be fun for you. | 品酒会 对你来说会很有意思 |
| [04:23] | I have games on my phone. | 我有手游 |
| [04:26] | That’s them. | 他们到了 |
| [04:27] | Oh, I almost forgot, curtsy when you meet Leanne, | 我差点忘了 见到琳恩行曲膝礼 |
| [04:30] | – she’s British royalty. – What? | -她是英国皇室 -什么 |
| [04:31] | I’m screwing with you; she’s a makeup girl from Buffalo. | 我耍你的 她是来自水牛城的化妆师 |
| [04:35] | Not funny. | 不好笑 |
| [04:36] | You should’ve made her curtsy. | 你应该让她行礼的 |
| [04:39] | Hi, welcome. Bonnie. | 欢迎 我是邦妮 |
| [04:41] | I’m Mitch, this is Leanne. | 我是米奇 这是琳恩 |
| [04:42] | Thank you so much for having us. | 非常感谢你邀请我们 |
| [04:44] | My pleasure. Please come in. | 我的荣幸 请进 |
| [04:46] | Yo, Professor Nutsack! | 阴囊教授 |
| [04:48] | Stinky Dickweed! | 臭鸡麻 |
| [04:51] | How are you, my man? | 好吗 伙计 |
| [04:54] | Aren’t you glad you made bread? | 是不是很庆幸做了面包 |
| [04:57] | Leanne, Mitch, this is my daughter Christy. | 琳恩 米奇 这是我女儿克丽丝蒂 |
| [04:59] | Hi, Christy. | 你好 克丽丝蒂 |
| [05:01] | Nice to meet you both. I’m sorry I have to go, | 很高兴见到你们 抱歉我必须得出门了 |
| [05:03] | I have a class and then work. | 我要上课 还有工作 |
| [05:05] | – What do you do? – I’m a waitress at the Rustic Fig. | -你做什么工作 -我是”乡村无花果”的服务员 |
| [05:08] | Oh, we heard about that place. | 我们听说过那地方 |
| [05:09] | We wanted to eat there. | 想去尝尝那里的菜 |
| [05:10] | You’re about to. | 马上就能尝到了 |
| [05:13] | Time to go. | 该走了 |
| [05:14] | – Bye.- Bye. | -拜 -拜 |
| [05:16] | Oh, she seems sweet. | 她看起来真是个可人 |
| [05:19] | Please, everybody sit down. | 各位请坐 |
| [05:21] | Okay– oh, we-we brought you a little gift. | 我们给你买了点小礼物 |
| [05:23] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [05:24] | Adam said you don’t drink anymore, | 亚当说你不喝酒了 |
| [05:26] | but it’s good when you have company. | 但有客人来能用得上 |
| [05:32] | Like now. | 比如说现在 |
| [05:33] | – Oh, yeah. – Yeah, I mean, you don’t have to. | -对 -你不一定要打开 |
| [05:34] | – No, I’ll open it. – No, no, yeah, just go ahead and do it. | -我来开 -不 好吧 去开吧 |
| [05:37] | Well, just-just one glass, though. | 不过就喝一杯 |
| [05:38] | We’re still going wine tasting, right? | 我们还是要去品酒会 对吗 |
| [05:40] | No, I drove all the way to Napa Valley | 不 我开这么远的车到纳帕谷 |
| [05:42] | to hang out with Stinky Dickweed. | 是为了和臭鸡麻好好聚聚 |
| [05:45] | I look forward to hearing | 我想听听 |
| [05:46] | where that nickname came from. | 这个绰号是怎么来的 |
| [05:48] | That’s a funny story, actually. | 是个很有趣的故事 |
| [05:49] | We were shooting on location in Malaysia, | 我们在马来西亚拍外景 |
| [05:52] | and your brilliant boyfriend thought it’d be a good idea | 你的天才男友想到个好主意 |
| [05:54] | to hide his pot in his underwear. | 把大麻藏在他内裤里 |
| [05:57] | Yeah, and when we smoked it, | 我们抽的时候 |
| [05:58] | it smelled suspiciously like my balls. | 味道相当像我的蛋蛋 |
| [06:07] | Everything’s fine, Marjorie, | 一切都很好 玛乔丽 |
| [06:08] | I was just too tired to make the meeting. | 我太累了 开不了会 |
| [06:12] | Yeah, I need a good night’s sleep. | 我需要好好睡一觉 |
| [06:15] | Thanks, talk to you tomorrow. | 谢谢 明天跟你聊 |
| [06:18] | Get him, Mitch, get him! | 压住他 米奇 |
| [06:19] | Who’s your daddy, Ironside? | 谁是你爹 轮椅神探 |
| [06:22] | Come on, stop holding back! | 别有所保留 |
| [06:24] | I’m trying to make it a fair fight. | 我在试图公平比赛 |
| [06:25] | Hey, Leanne, hold my feet. | 琳恩 抓住我的脚 |
| [06:27] | I got you, baby. Okay. | 我来了 亲爱的 好 |
| [06:29] | All right, here comes the pain! | 感受痛苦吧 |
| [06:32] | Aah! Let go of my junk! | 放开我的老二 |
| [06:35] | Spoiler alert, | 剧透警告 |
| [06:36] | that’s why we call Mitch “Professor Nutsack.” | 所以我们称米奇为阴囊教授 |
| [06:44] | So no wineries? | 没去酒庄吗 |
| [06:46] | We never left the apartment. | 我们都没离开公寓 |
| [06:49] | They just stayed here and drank. | 他们就留在这里喝酒 |
| [06:51] | Where’d all the booze come from? | 这些酒是哪里来的 |
| [06:52] | The trunk of their car. | 他们车子的后备箱 |
| [06:55] | They brought it from L.A. | 他们从洛杉矶带来的 |
| [06:56] | in case there wasn’t enough wine in Napa Valley. | 以免纳帕谷酒不够 |
| [07:00] | Chug, chug, chug, chug! | 嘎嘎 嘎嘎 |
| [07:03] | And there might not be. | 也许是不够 |
| [07:06] | I’m so drunk, I can’t feel my legs. | 我好醉 都感觉不到我的腿了 |
| [07:10] | Oh, wait. | 等等 |
| [07:12] | Hey, hen party in the kitchen! | 厨房里在开女人聚会啊 |
| [07:15] | Old school! | 老派作风 |
| [07:20] | Look, it’s the Ghost of Christmas Past. | 瞧 是过去的阴魂 |
| [07:25] | Hey, um, Christy, can I– can I tell you something | 克丽丝蒂 我能跟你说一件 |
| [07:27] | that I’ve been thinking about all night? | 我想了一整晚的事吗 |
| [07:30] | You should go home and I should go to bed? | 你该回家 我该上床睡觉吗 |
| [07:33] | I could make you so pretty. | 我可以让你变得很漂亮 |
| [07:40] | I’m sorry? | 你说什么 |
| [07:42] | Didn’t Adam tell you? | 亚当没告诉你吗 |
| [07:43] | I’m a professional makeup artist. | 我是专业化妆师 |
| [07:45] | It’s my job to make people like you pretty. | 我的工作就是让你这样的人变漂亮 |
| [07:50] | I’m a professional makeup artist! | 我是专业化妆师 |
| [07:53] | Mommy, help me. | 妈妈 救我 |
| [07:55] | I’d kind of like to see what she can do. | 我想看看她能做什么 |
| [08:00] | Thanks for easing up on the drinking. | 谢谢你没喝那么多酒 |
| [08:03] | That was a good call, babe. | 那是个好决定 亲爱的 |
| [08:05] | All things in moderation. | 一切都是适度的 |
| [08:09] | They both really like you. | 他们都很喜欢你 |
| [08:10] | Oh, goodie. | 真好 |
| [08:14] | Ta-da. | 瞧瞧 |
| [08:18] | Oh, my God, I’m gorgeous. Mm-hmm. | 天啊 我好美 |
| [08:21] | You-You look like you’re in your 30s again. | 你看起来像是回到了30多岁 |
| [08:23] | I am in my 30s. | 我就是30多岁 |
| [08:25] | So am I. | 我也是 |
| [08:26] | Wink, wink. | 眨眨眼 |
| [08:29] | Hey. Whoa, you look amazing. | 你看起来很美 |
| [08:33] | – Thank you. – Thank you. | -谢谢 -谢谢 |
| [08:36] | Leanne, I was told to bring you this. | 琳恩 有人叫我给你这个 |
| [08:38] | – Gracias. – Now, if you’ll excuse me, | -谢谢 -我先失陪了 |
| [08:41] | I have to go to the bathroom. | 我要去卫生间 |
| [08:43] | The hot cheese is making its move. | 热芝士开始行动了 |
| [08:48] | You really are good at what you do. | 你真的很擅长化妆啊 |
| [08:51] | My secret is, | 我的秘诀是 |
| [08:52] | keep applying makeup until it’s something you want to sit on. | 一直上妆 直到满意为止 |
| [08:58] | You’re kidding, right? | 你在开玩笑 对吧 |
| [09:00] | Mm, of course, I’m kidding. | 当然了 |
| [09:02] | Wink, wink. | 眨眨眼 |
| [09:06] | You know, I admire you. | 我欣赏你 |
| [09:09] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [09:10] | Your opinion used to mean a great deal to me. | 你的想法之前对我来说很重要 |
| [09:13] | Seriously, like, staying sober when you got nothing going on, | 说真的 无所事事时坚持戒瘾 |
| [09:19] | and it kind of makes you a little boring, | 这让你有些无聊 |
| [09:20] | that’s impressive. | 太了不起了 |
| [09:22] | Again, thank you. | 再说一次 谢谢 |
| [09:24] | Good on ya, Bonnie lass! | 你真不错 邦妮妹子 |
| [09:27] | Where’d you just go? | 你刚去哪里了 |
| [09:30] | You know, I got sober once. | 我之前戒瘾过一次 |
| [09:32] | – Really? – Yep, I went to a couple of meetings, | -真的吗 -是的 我去参加过几次互助会 |
| [09:35] | I heard the spiel, I bought a book, | 听大家分享 买了本书 |
| [09:36] | and then one night I’m looking around the room | 有一晚我环顾房间 |
| [09:39] | and I said to myself, “Mitch, these aren’t your people, | 对自己说 米奇 这些人和你不是一类人 |
| [09:44] | “These people are quitters. | 这些人是轻言放弃的人 |
| [09:46] | “You’re not a quitter, | 你可不是 |
| [09:48] | “You’re the opposite of that, | 你恰恰相反 |
| [09:50] | you’re a successful film director”” | 你是成功的电影导演 |
| [09:54] | Move it. | 拿开 |
| [09:55] | Mm. Not that way. | 不是那边 |
| [09:57] | Oh, I’m sorry. | 对不起 |
| [09:59] | Bad! Bad hand! | 坏 坏手 |
| [10:00] | We-We-We talked about that. | 我们聊过的 |
| [10:02] | Thank God I brought my good hand. | 谢天谢地我带了好手 |
| [10:05] | Okay. | 好 |
| [10:07] | You’re Adam’s friend, | 你是亚当的朋友 |
| [10:07] | and you’re really drunk right now, so I’m gonna be a sport | 现在烂醉如泥 所以我就表现得有风度点 |
| [10:10] | and give both your hands a pass. | 放过你的双手 |
| [10:11] | But if it ever happens again, | 但如果这种事再次发生 |
| [10:13] | I will hit you so hard, | 老娘会揍扁你 |
| [10:14] | you’ll be crapping teeth for a week. | 让你拉一周的牙齿 |
| [10:20] | God help me, it might be worth it. | 天啊 也许值得 |
| [10:31] | And three double cheeseburgers. | 三个双层奶酪汉堡 |
| [10:33] | With cheese. | 加奶酪 |
| [10:35] | Two large fries… | 两份大份薯条 |
| [10:36] | With cheese and a chicken sandwich. | 加奶酪和鸡肉三明治 |
| [10:39] | …and a chicken sandwich. | 还有鸡肉三明治 |
| [10:41] | And a burrito. | 还有玉米煎饼 |
| [10:42] | They don’t have burritos. | 他们没有玉米煎饼 |
| [10:43] | Why don’t they have burritos? | 为什么他们没有玉米煎饼 |
| [10:43] | Why don’t you have burritos?! | 为什么你们没有玉米煎饼 |
| [10:46] | I think that’s it. | 这就够了 |
| [10:47] | Oh! Oh, and a crunchy candy cookie cup. | 还有酥糖曲奇杯 |
| [10:50] | I-I think we’ve got enough. | 我觉得够了 |
| [10:51] | Cookie cup, cookie cup, cookie cup! | 曲奇杯 曲奇杯 曲奇杯 |
| [10:55] | So… three cookie cups? | 三个曲奇杯吗 |
| [10:57] | – Sure. – Yes. | -行 -好棒 |
| [10:58] | It’ll be $52.75. | 一共52.75元 |
| [11:00] | Please drive forward. | 请往前开 |
| [11:03] | So… whoa… | 那么 |
| [11:05] | So… | 那么 |
| [11:07] | you and… you and Adam are cute together. | 你和亚当很配 |
| [11:09] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [11:10] | Is he still good in bed? | 他的床技还很好吗 |
| [11:14] | I’m sorry, what? | 抱歉 你说什么 |
| [11:15] | He was incredible back when he had legs. | 他有腿的时候床技一流 |
| [11:18] | Oh, I’m… Oh, I’m sorry. | 很抱歉 |
| [11:19] | I don’t want… I didn’t mean that. | 我不想 我不是那意思 |
| [11:20] | I mean, of course he still has legs, but, you know… | 当然他现在还有腿 但是 |
| [11:25] | You slept with Adam? | 你跟亚当睡过吗 |
| [11:29] | Dear Lord, will this night ever end? | 天啊 这一晚会结束吗 |
| [11:32] | – Answer me. – Calm down. | -回答我 -冷静点 |
| [11:33] | It was a long time ago before I met Mitch, | 那时候我还没遇见米奇 |
| [11:36] | and we only did it, like, t… t… 20 times. | 我们只做了20次 |
| [11:42] | Really thought you were gonna say two. | 我还以为你要说两次 |
| [11:44] | So, you were a couple? | 你们是情侣吗 |
| [11:46] | No, oh, no! | 不是 |
| [11:47] | No, no, it was just that kind of raw kind of sex. | 不是 只是原始的性爱 |
| [11:50] | You know, the kind you think about | 当你坐在马桶上 |
| [11:51] | when you’re on the toilet having a cigarette. | 抽烟时想到的那种 |
| [11:55] | Hey, guys, this is important. Guys, this is important, listen. | 各位 这很重要 各位 这很重要 |
| [11:58] | Mitch doesn’t know, so we just have to keep it between us. | 米奇不知道 我们得保密 |
| [12:02] | You know… sisterhood of the traveling penis. | 旅行老二的姐妹会 |
| [12:11] | I don’t know what you’re always whining about. | 我不知道你总是抱怨什么 |
| [12:13] | This thing is awesome. | 这玩意儿太棒了 |
| [12:16] | Food’s here. | 食物来了 |
| [12:17] | Oh, finally. | 终于 |
| [12:18] | Hey, baby, did you know | 亲爱的 你知道 |
| [12:19] | that the liquor store down on the corner, | 拐角处的贩酒店 |
| [12:21] | that it delivers? | 还送外卖吗 |
| [12:22] | Just eat your burger, Dickweed. | 吃你的汉堡吧 鸡麻 |
| [12:26] | Huddle. | 过来谈谈 |
| [12:27] | Ugh, I don’t want to huddle. | 我不想谈 |
| [12:28] | Just let me go to sleep. | 让我睡吧 |
| [12:29] | What? You think you’re too pretty to huddle now? | 怎么 你觉得现在自己太美 不能谈了吗 |
| [12:31] | Get in there. | 快过来 |
| [12:32] | I am pretty, aren’t I? | 我很漂亮 对吧 |
| [12:36] | Why didn’t you get me any vodka? | 你为什么没给我买伏特加 |
| [12:38] | Why didn’t you get me a 24-year-old Asian girl with big boobs? | 你为什么不给我24岁的大胸亚洲妞 |
| [12:42] | Hey, words hurt. | 你这话很伤人的 |
| [12:45] | Just kidding. | 我开玩笑的 |
| [12:46] | Ah, I love you. | 我爱你 |
| [12:48] | And you have perfect boobs. | 你的胸很棒 |
| [12:51] | You, too. | 你也是 |
| [12:56] | That right there. | 就这样 |
| [12:57] | That’s how you make a marriage work. | 这就是婚姻成功的秘诀 |
| [13:01] | Thanks, buddy. | 谢谢 哥们 |
| [13:07] | Where are we? | 我们在哪 |
| [13:11] | I’m sorry, I just can’t wrap my head around it. | 抱歉 我就是无法理解 |
| [13:13] | 20 times? | 20次 |
| [13:14] | She’s probably exaggerating. | 她可能夸张了 |
| [13:16] | When it comes to sex, | 聊到性爱时 |
| [13:17] | women round down, Christy, not up. | 女人会说少 克丽丝蒂 不是说多 |
| [13:19] | – We do? – You don’t? | -是吗 -你不是吗 |
| [13:20] | I didn’t, but I will now. | 我之前不是 但我现在会了 |
| [13:24] | I’m not sure how to handle it. | 我不确定该如何处理 |
| [13:25] | There’s nothing to handle. It’s in the past. | 没什么好处理的 都过去了 |
| [13:27] | No, it’s in my living room, | 不 就在我的卧室 |
| [13:28] | and more important, he didn’t tell me. | 更重要的是 他没告诉我 |
| [13:30] | So, what, you’re gonna confront him? | 那你要跟他对质吗 |
| [13:32] | I thought the whole idea of this evening | 我还以为今晚的目的 |
| [13:34] | was to make his friends like you. | 就是为了让他的朋友们喜欢你 |
| [13:35] | That’s when I was putting deviled eggs on levels. | 那是我把魔鬼蛋放在架子上时的想法 |
| [13:38] | I should’ve just put out a dog bowl. | 我该直接拿个狗碗出来 |
| [13:42] | Okay, Adam, it’s time you and I have a talk. | 亚当 我们该谈谈了 |
| [13:47] | Oh, lovely. | 真好 |
| [13:53] | Under the head, under the head. | 放在头下面 |
| [13:57] | Where’s Lord and Lady Nutsack? | 阴囊夫妇呢 |
| [13:59] | Probably playing kickball with their livers. | 也许和肝脏在玩踢球游戏 |
| [14:03] | Come on, baby, let’s make a dirty movie. | 来 亲爱的 我们拍部三级片 |
| [14:05] | Okay, okay, turn around and try to relax. | 好 转过身 放松 |
| [14:12] | Thin walls. I get it now. | 墙壁很薄 我现在懂了 |
| [14:15] | We’re gonna have to burn that bed. | 我们得烧了那张床 |
| [14:19] | What just happened? | 刚发生了什么 |
| [14:20] | I don’t know. That sounded bad. | 我不知道 听起来是坏事 |
| [14:23] | I guess we should go see if they’re okay. | 我想我们该去看看他们是否没事 |
| [14:26] | Or we just leave and rebuild our lives elsewhere. | 或者我们离开这里 去别的地方重建生活 |
| [14:34] | Hello? | 有人吗 |
| [14:43] | Well, this is just sad. | 真悲哀 |
| [14:48] | Remember being too drunk to have sex? | 太醉了没法做爱吗 |
| [14:51] | It’s the main reason you’re an only child. | 这是你是独女的主要原因 |
| [14:54] | So, what do we do? | 我们要怎么做 |
| [14:57] | Roll them on their sides and be grateful | 帮他们侧身躺着 心怀感恩 |
| [14:59] | we don’t live like this anymore. | 我们不再过这种生活了 |
| [15:01] | So very grateful. | 太感恩了 |
| [15:08] | Oh, God, was that him or her? | 天啊 是他还是她 |
| [15:14] | Does it really matter? | 这还重要吗 |
| [16:05] | Mom? | 妈妈 |
| [16:06] | Yes? | 怎么了 |
| [16:10] | – What? – What the hell?! | -什么 -什么情况 |
| [16:12] | Ah, I was… I was looking for the bathroom. | 我在找卫生间 |
| [16:14] | Well, I’m not it! | 我可不是 |
| [16:15] | Well, okay, no harm, no foul. | 没有伤害 就没有犯规 |
| [16:17] | Dónde está el baño? | 卫生间在哪里 |
| [16:22] | What is going on? | 怎么了 |
| [16:23] | Mitch, where’d you go? | 米奇 你去哪里了 |
| [16:24] | Into my bed! | 来了我的床上 |
| [16:26] | You miserable bastard. | 你这个老混蛋 |
| [16:30] | Come on, it was an honest mistake. | 拜托 这是无心之失 |
| [16:32] | When you grabbed my ass in the kitchen, | 你在厨房摸我屁股时 |
| [16:34] | was that an honest mistake? | 那也是无心之失吗 |
| [16:35] | Well, a person can make more than one honest mistake. | 一个人可以犯不止一个无心之失 |
| [16:39] | You grabbed her ass? | 你摸了她的屁股吗 |
| [16:40] | With both hands. | 两只手都摸了 |
| [16:41] | Damn it, Mitch. | 该死 米奇 |
| [16:44] | Come on. | 拜托 |
| [16:45] | Why is everybody yelling? | 为什么大家都在喊 |
| [16:47] | Your best friend just tried to get in bed with my daughter. | 你最好的朋友想上我女儿的床 |
| [16:50] | What? No, no, that can’t be right. | 什么 不 那不对 |
| [16:52] | It may have been 18 months and 11 days, | 虽然已经过了18个月11天 |
| [16:54] | but I know when a man is in bed with me. | 但有男人上我的床我还是知道的 |
| [16:58] | This is all your fault. | 这全是你的错 |
| [17:00] | My fault?! | 我的错 |
| [17:00] | You invited these zoo animals into my home, | 你邀请了这些动物园里的动物来我家 |
| [17:03] | and you never told me | 而且你从没告诉我 |
| [17:05] | you slept with this monkey. | 你睡过这只猴子 |
| [17:06] | Approximately 20 times. | 大概有20次 |
| [17:08] | What? | 什么 |
| [17:09] | Monkey? | 猴子 |
| [17:11] | You-You didn’t think that was something you should tell me? | 你不觉得你该告诉我这种事吗 |
| [17:13] | I-I… it’s… | 那 |
| [17:14] | You porked my wife?! | 你搞了我老婆吗 |
| [17:16] | I wouldn’t use that word. | 我不会用那个词 |
| [17:18] | I would. | 我会 |
| [17:21] | But that was before we got together. | 但那是在我们认识之前 |
| [17:23] | We’re married now, and you’re playing hump the hostesses-es? | 我们现在结婚了 而你在咸猪手吗 |
| [17:28] | Wait, wait, wait, wait. | 等等 |
| [17:30] | Wait a minute, you… | 等等 你 |
| [17:31] | you hit on Bonnie? | 你挑逗了邦妮吗 |
| [17:33] | It was nothing. Yeah, it was just joking around. | 那没什么 只是在胡闹 |
| [17:35] | It was, it was, you know, my bad hand bit. | 是我的坏手做的 |
| [17:38] | She didn’t get it. | 她不懂 |
| [17:40] | You did bad hand on my woman? | 你对我女人上了坏手吗 |
| [17:42] | And good hand. | 还有好手 |
| [17:43] | Good hand’s new. | 好手是新梗 |
| [17:46] | What the hell is wrong with you?! | 你什么毛病啊 |
| [17:48] | Uh, all right! | 好吧 |
| [17:50] | All right! | 好吧 |
| [17:52] | All right, all right! | 好吧 好吧 |
| [17:53] | This is it! This is it! | 就这样 就这样 |
| [18:00] | I have a drinking problem. | 我有酗酒问题 |
| [18:05] | What? | 什么 |
| [18:06] | I do. I need help. | 真的 我需要帮助 |
| [18:08] | Ah, son of a bitch, now we have to be nice to him. | 该死 现在我们得对他友好了 |
| [18:11] | No, no, no, don’t fall for it. | 不不 别上当 |
| [18:12] | He catches alcoholism every time I find him | 每次我发现他压着女演员时 |
| [18:14] | facedown in an actress. | 他就突然有酗酒问题了 |
| [18:16] | See, this… this is half the reason I drink. | 这就是我喝酒的一半原因 |
| [18:19] | – She shames me. – Okay. | -她让我蒙羞 -好吧 |
| [18:21] | – Okay. Okay, yeah, yeah. – You’re one of my demons, Leanne! | -好吧 -你是我的恶魔 琳恩 |
| [18:24] | All right, everybody, just take it easy. | 好了各位 淡定点 |
| [18:26] | Bonnie, I’m-I’m-I’m sorry | 邦妮 抱歉 |
| [18:29] | that I didn’t tell you about Leanne. | 我没跟你说琳恩的事 |
| [18:30] | Just no excuse, no defense, just wrong, and, Mitch, | 没有借口 不做辩护 那是错的 米奇 |
| [18:34] | even though it happened before the two of you got together, | 虽然那发生在你俩认识之前 |
| [18:36] | I guess I owe you something, too. | 我想我也欠你的 |
| [18:40] | Come here, brother. | 过来吧 兄弟 |
| [18:41] | Oh, thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [18:42] | Man, you know I-I was just kidding… | 我只是开玩笑的 |
| [18:47] | Oh! Bad hand! | 坏手 |
| [18:51] | It’s not cool, Dickweed! | 这样可不酷 鸡麻 |
| [18:56] | Is there any vodka left? | 还剩伏特加吗 |
| [19:14] | Hi, I’m Mitch and… I’m an alcoholic. | 大家好 我是米奇 我是酒瘾者 |
| [19:19] | Hi, Mitch. | 你好 米奇 |
| [19:21] | I hurt a lot of people I love this weekend, | 这周末我伤害了许多我爱的人 |
| [19:24] | whether it was hitting on my best friend’s girl… | 不管是调戏我最好朋友的女友 |
| [19:30] | …or her daughter… | 和她女儿 |
| [19:33] | …or urinating in their laundry hamper. | 还是在她们的衣物篮里尿尿 |
| [19:40] | This damn disease. Am I right? | 这该死的病 对吧 |
| [19:46] | Anyway, I-I-I just want to say | 总之 我只是想说 |
| [19:48] | that I’m-I’m really grateful to this program | 我很感激这个项目 |
| [19:51] | for helping my wife see that it’s not my fault. | 帮我妻子看出了这不是我的错 |
| [20:02] | Namaste. | 合十礼 |
| [20:07] | You think he can stay sober this time? | 你觉得他这次能坚持戒瘾吗 |
| [20:08] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
| [20:09] | We go to New Orleans right from here. | 接下来我们要去新奥尔良 |
| [20:11] | We’ll see what happens. | 看看会发生什么吗 |
| [20:13] | Would anyone else like to share? | 还有谁想分享吗 |
| [20:15] | So… did they like you? | 那 他们喜欢你吗 |