| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | You slept with Adam? | 你跟亚当睡过吗 |
| [00:04] | We only did it, like… | 我们只做了 |
| [00:07] | 20 times. | 20次 |
| [00:08] | You never told me you slept with this monkey. | 你从没告诉我你睡过这只猴子 |
| [00:10] | You porked my wife?! | 你搞了我老婆吗 |
| [00:12] | I wouldn’t use that word. | 我不会用那个词 |
| [00:14] | I would. | 我会 |
| [00:15] | – You grabbed her ass? – With both hands. | -你摸了她的屁股吗 -两只手都摸了 |
| [00:17] | You did “Bad hand” On my woman? | 你对我女人上了坏手吗 |
| [00:20] | I have a drinking problem. | 我有酗酒问题 |
| [00:23] | Come here, brother. | 过来吧 兄弟 |
| [00:24] | Oh, thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [00:25] | Man, you know, I-I was just kidding. | 我只是开玩笑的 |
| [00:32] | You’ve been reading Cosmopolitan again, haven’t you? | 你又看《时尚》杂志了 对吗 |
| [00:36] | Don’t know why every man doesn’t. | 我不知道为何别的男人不看 |
| [00:39] | – I love you. – I love you, too. | -我爱你 -我也爱你 |
| [00:41] | My friend Mitch is coming to town. | 我朋友米奇要来城里了 |
| [00:45] | – What? – I said I love you. | -什么 -我说我爱你 |
| [00:47] | Drunk Hollywood douchebag Mitch? | 酗酒好莱坞混蛋米奇吗 |
| [00:50] | I know the last time he was here things got a little bumpy… | 我知道他上次来时出了点事 |
| [00:52] | A little bumpy? He hit on me and my daughter. | 出了点事 他调戏我和我女儿 |
| [00:55] | He peed in three places that weren’t the bathroom. | 他在不是厕所的三处地方小便 |
| [00:58] | One of them was our good salad bowl. | 其中一处是我们高级的沙拉碗 |
| [01:00] | But he’s not the same guy anymore. | 但他变了 |
| [01:01] | He sobered up, he divorced Leanne, | 他戒瘾了 他和琳恩离婚了 |
| [01:03] | he’s on a whole different path, | 他走上了不同的道路 |
| [01:05] | and he just wants some bro time. | 他只是想和兄弟相聚 |
| [01:07] | If you ever want to have sex with me again, | 如果你想和我再做爱 |
| [01:09] | don’t say “Bro time.” | 就别说”兄弟相聚” |
| [01:11] | Fine. | 好吧 |
| [01:11] | You see him. Just keep him away from me. | 你见你的 别让他来烦我 |
| [01:15] | Actually… | 实际上 |
| [01:17] | He just wants to apologize to you and Christy. | 他想对你和克丽丝蒂道歉 |
| [01:21] | You son of a bitch. | 你个混球 |
| [01:23] | – What? – You waited to tell me this | -怎么了 -你等我有了 |
| [01:25] | till after I had a decent orgasm. | 不赖的高潮后才告诉我 |
| [01:27] | “Decent”? You practically levitated. | “不赖” 你都要起飞了 |
| [01:31] | Fine, it was a cascading series of body tremors. | 好吧 那是一连串的身体震颤 |
| [01:34] | Just like the article promised! So, what do you say? | 杂志诚不欺我 那你同意吗 |
| [01:37] | Oh, no, this is way too big a favor for just one go-around. | 不 这么大的人情只靠一次不够 |
| [01:43] | You’re kidding, right? | 你是在开玩笑吧 |
| [01:44] | Nope. | 不是 |
| [01:45] | Seriously, why am I still looking at your face? | 说真的 我怎么还能看到你的脸 |
| [02:11] | I can’t believe you’re letting that animal back into our lives. | 我不敢相信你又接纳了那个禽兽 |
| [02:13] | Well, at least it’s only one animal this time. | 至少这次只有一个禽兽 |
| [02:15] | Leanne’s out of the picture. | 琳恩不在了 |
| [02:17] | I’m still kind of shocked they got divorced. | 他们离婚依然令我震惊 |
| [02:19] | Really? I’m shocked that marriage didn’t end | 真的吗 我很震惊婚姻结局 |
| [02:21] | in a murder-suicide. | 不是谋杀后自杀 |
| [02:22] | Yeah, but they’re kind of made for each other. | 是啊 但他们是天造地设的一对 |
| [02:25] | Like water parks and diarrhea. | 就像水上乐园和痢疾 |
| [02:29] | Hey, we’re here. | 我们到了 |
| [02:30] | Ugh, I can’t do this. | 我受不了 |
| [02:31] | I promised Adam five minutes, | 我答应亚当给他五分钟 |
| [02:33] | and then we can head to the meeting. | 然后我们就去参加互助会 |
| [02:34] | I got to stop wearing stuff with handles. | 我不能再穿有把儿的衣服了 |
| [02:38] | Bonnie, Christy. | 邦妮 克丽丝蒂 |
| [02:41] | You remember Mitch. | 你们记得米奇 |
| [02:44] | Thank you for seeing me. | 感谢你们见我 |
| [02:47] | You might want to take that as a win and leave. | 你还是见好就走吧 |
| [02:49] | No. No, I got to do this. | 不不 我必须做 |
| [02:54] | Christy, Bonnie… | 克丽丝蒂 邦妮 |
| [02:56] | I owe you both an amends | 我欠你们一个道歉 |
| [02:58] | for the wreckage I caused on my last visit. | 因为上次我来时弄得一团糟 |
| [03:01] | I hope that you can give me another chance. | 我希望你们能再给我一次机会 |
| [03:04] | But if you can’t… | 但如果你们不给的话 |
| [03:06] | I totally understand. | 我完全理解 |
| [03:09] | I cry so easily these days. | 近来我很容易流泪 |
| [03:15] | What do you think? | 你觉得呢 |
| [03:16] | I think making an amends like that is really painful. | 我觉得那样道歉很痛苦 |
| [03:20] | Keep going. | 继续说啊 |
| [03:22] | I didn’t understand… | 我不知道 |
| [03:25] | what an ass I was. | 我有多混蛋 |
| [03:27] | Ooh, I like that. Delve into that. | 我喜欢 仔细说 |
| [03:30] | I actually thought my behavior was charming. | 我以为我的行为很迷人 |
| [03:33] | That’s alcoholic thinking for you. | 这是酒后思维 |
| [03:36] | Anyway, all I can do now | 总之 我现在只能 |
| [03:39] | is try to repair the damage. | 试着弥补过错 |
| [03:43] | Damn it, that was really good. | 可恶 说太好了 |
| [03:46] | Hold on. | 等等 |
| [03:50] | Oh, crap. Real tears. | 见鬼 真眼泪 |
| [03:54] | Forgiven. | 原谅了 |
| [03:56] | So, are we all kumbaya here? | 现在大家都和好了吗 |
| [03:59] | ‘Cause I’m gonna show Mitch the bar | 因为我要在你们去互助会时 |
| [04:01] | while you two go to your meeting. | 带米奇去看酒吧 |
| [04:03] | Actually, buddy, I’m-I’m feeling a little fragile. | 实际上 兄弟 我有点脆弱 |
| [04:05] | I could really use a meeting right now. | 我现在很需要参加互助会 |
| [04:08] | Do you mind if I tag along? | 你们介意我跟着去吗 |
| [04:11] | Well? | 这个嘛 |
| [04:12] | We’re not really allowed to say no. | 我们没权利说不 |
| [04:15] | Stupid program. | 该死的计划 |
| [04:18] | Come on. | 走吧 |
| [04:19] | Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa, you just got here. | 等等 你才刚到 |
| [04:23] | What happened to bro time? | 说好的兄弟相聚呢 |
| [04:24] | Hey, what’d I say about that? | 我怎么说的来着 |
| [04:28] | So, I’m directing this movie in Dubrovnik, | 我在杜布罗夫尼克执导电影 |
| [04:31] | and everybody’s looking at me to steer the ship | 所有人都期望我来掌舵 |
| [04:33] | ’cause, you know, I’m the director. | 因为你们知道 我是导演 |
| [04:37] | And all I can think is, “I’m a fraud.” | 而我满脑子想着 我是个骗子 |
| [04:41] | “I’m a drunk. I’m a liar.” | 我是个酒鬼 我是个谎话精 |
| [04:44] | You’re safe here. | 你在这里很安全 |
| [04:47] | I feel that. | 我能感觉到 |
| [04:49] | So, I start saying the prayer | 于是我开始 |
| [04:51] | in my head, and… I’ll be darned | 在脑中祈祷 还好 |
| [04:55] | if God didn’t grant me the serenity to call “Action” | 上帝赐予我平静 让我喊出”开机” |
| [04:59] | and send the Harley off the cliff, | 让哈雷摩托飞出悬崖 |
| [05:01] | through the helicopter door, out the other side, | 穿过直升机两侧的门 |
| [05:03] | where it hit a second helicopter, | 然后撞上第二架直升机 |
| [05:05] | exploded, ball of fire, dead bad guy, | 爆炸 火团 坏人死 |
| [05:08] | that’s a wrap and a Golden Globe nomination. | 拍完收工 金球奖提名入手 |
| [05:11] | Golden Globe? | 金球奖 |
| [05:12] | Well, if you believe the buzz. Anyway, | 如果你相信风评的话 总之 |
| [05:16] | I’m just another drunk trying to get through the day. | 我只是个艰难度日的酒鬼 |
| [05:19] | Well, a drunk who’s a Hollywood director. | 一个是好莱坞导演的酒鬼 |
| [05:23] | Wow, lunch goes faster when someone else does the talking. | 其他人说话时 午餐时间过得更快 |
| [05:29] | I don’t know how you handle the pressure of making a movie. | 我不知道你是如何应付拍片压力的 |
| [05:33] | I can barely deal with work and school. | 工作和学业都压得我喘不过气 |
| [05:35] | If they ever stopped making Red Bull, I’d be screwed. | 如果红牛停产 我就完了 |
| [05:38] | I actually won three Red Bull Stunt Awards. | 我其实赢得过三座红牛特技表演奖 |
| [05:42] | But have you ever considered meditating? | 但你考虑过冥想吗 |
| [05:45] | I tried, | 我试过 |
| [05:46] | but apparently my mind craves anxiety. | 但显然我的思想渴望焦虑 |
| [05:50] | Well, it changed my life. | 那改变了我的人生 |
| [05:51] | It made me a much better director. | 让我成了更好的导演 |
| [05:53] | That’s four. | 四次了 |
| [05:55] | Ladies, I just… I want to thank you | 女士们 我想感谢你们 |
| [05:58] | for letting me into the red tent. | 让我加入女性聚会 |
| [06:00] | I-I’ve just been so raw since Leanne and I split up. | 我和琳恩分开后 我一直很难受 |
| [06:04] | Yeah, now, what happened there? | 你们怎么了 |
| [06:07] | Well, I got sober, and she couldn’t do it. | 我戒瘾了 她做不到 |
| [06:11] | I love her, but I had to let her go. | 我爱她 但我只能对她放手 |
| [06:15] | Yeah, the road gets narrower, but our life gets better. | 是的 路更窄 但我们的生活更好 |
| [06:20] | Thank you for that. | 感谢你这样说 |
| [06:23] | We’re all here for you. | 我们都支持你 |
| [06:28] | Oh. No, no, no, ladies, this one is on me. | 不不不 女士们 我来 |
| [06:33] | Finally. I’ve been waiting for four years | 终于 我等了四年 |
| [06:35] | for somebody else to pick up… | 别人买单… |
| [06:37] | Hold the phone, is that a black card? | 等等 那是黑卡吗 |
| [06:40] | – This? Oh, yeah. – Is it true | -这个吗 是的 -你真的 |
| [06:41] | you can buy a Ferrari with that? | 能用这卡买辆法拉利吗 |
| [06:43] | It’s almost rude if you don’t. | 不买都算是无礼 |
| [06:49] | Right? | 对吧 |
| [06:51] | You should shoot a movie here. | 你应该在这里拍部电影 |
| [06:53] | I could be in it. You know, I sing. | 我可以演 你知道我会唱歌吧 |
| [06:57] | I’m panning, and I’m loving. | 我在摇摄 我很喜欢 |
| [07:00] | I’m panning, and I’m loving. | 我在摇摄 我很喜欢 |
| [07:04] | Recast that guy. | 换演员 |
| [07:07] | – Come on, you like? – It’s fantastic. | -你真喜欢吗 -太棒了 |
| [07:09] | Where was this place when my blood type was bourbon? | 我的血型是波旁酒时 怎么没遇到这地方 |
| [07:12] | I know. I would’ve been totally sleeping with the bartender. | 我知道 我肯定会和这里的酒保睡 |
| [07:15] | Oh, wait, I am. | 等等 我是在睡 |
| [07:18] | So, how’s business been? | 生意如何 |
| [07:20] | Let’s just say that there are three people in here, | 这么说吧 现在有三个客人 |
| [07:22] | – and I’m excited. – I don’t get it. | -我很激动 -我不明白 |
| [07:24] | This place should be crushing it. | 这地方应该爆红 |
| [07:26] | It’s got charm, character, | 有魅力 有特色 |
| [07:28] | an owner you feel a little bit sorry for. | 有令人怜悯的老板 |
| [07:33] | I know. I keep telling him, work the chair. | 我知道 我一直在给他说 利用轮椅 |
| [07:36] | You guys done? | 你们说完了吗 |
| [07:37] | Never. Honestly, man, I love it. I love it. It’s great. | 永远说不完 说真的我喜欢 非常棒 |
| [07:41] | Thanks. As soon as we start turning a profit, | 谢谢 等扭亏为盈之后 |
| [07:43] | I got big plans. | 我还有大计划 |
| [07:44] | I want to hear them, but right now I got | 我很想听 但现在 |
| [07:46] | about a gallon of iced tea in me. | 我肚里装了一加仑冰茶 |
| [07:48] | Right that way. It’s the door that says “Hombres.” | 那边 门上写着西语”男子” |
| [07:50] | – Cool. – Still not sure I should’ve done that. | -好 -我还是不确定是否该那样写 |
| [07:55] | So, you two seem to be getting along. | 你们看起来相处愉快 |
| [07:57] | Well, yeah, he’s sober now, he kept his hands to himself, | 是的 他戒瘾了 手不乱摸了 |
| [08:00] | and he paid for lunch with a black card. | 而且他用黑卡付了午餐 |
| [08:03] | A black card. | 黑卡 |
| [08:05] | He does love waving that thing around. | 他确实喜欢挥舞那东西 |
| [08:07] | Well, maybe he could wave it at us | 也许他能对我们挥一下 |
| [08:08] | and make our problems disappear. | 解决我们的烦恼 |
| [08:11] | Seriously, if we want | 说真的 如果我们 |
| [08:12] | to take this bar to the next level, | 想让这个酒吧更上一层楼 |
| [08:13] | we need an investor. | 我们需要投资者 |
| [08:14] | I don’t know. Friends and business? | 我说不好 朋友掺和生意 |
| [08:16] | That’s as bad as having “Hombres” On the door. | 这跟在门上写西语”男子”一样糟 |
| [08:18] | Oh, come on. He lives in L.A., so we’d never hear from him. | 拜托 他住在洛杉矶 我们不联系 |
| [08:20] | He’d just send us money. | 他只给我们打钱 |
| [08:21] | It’s the exact opposite of having a child. | 这和养孩子完全相反 |
| [08:26] | You ever think of putting TVs above the urinals? | 你想过在小便池上放电视吗 |
| [08:28] | I have a buddy who produces 60-second TED Talks. | 我有个朋友制作60秒的Ted演讲 |
| [08:32] | Perfect for the average whiz. | 非常适合普通人 |
| [08:33] | You go in with a full bladder, you leave with a full mind. | 进去时膀胱满满 出来时思想丰富 |
| [08:37] | Look at that, Mitch has ideas for the bar. | 看看 米奇有关于酒吧的创意 |
| [08:40] | If only we had money to implement them. | 如果我们有钱实现就好了 |
| [08:42] | Bonnie. | 邦妮 |
| [08:43] | Are you looking for investors? | 你们在找投资人吗 |
| [08:45] | I would never put you in that position, buddy. | 我不会难为你的 兄弟 |
| [08:47] | What if I want to be in that position? | 如果我想被难为呢 |
| [08:49] | Yeah, what if he wants to? | 对 如果他想呢 |
| [08:52] | Are you sure about this, Mitch? | 你确定吗 米奇 |
| [08:53] | 100%. It’s part of the program. | 百分百 这是计划的一部分 |
| [08:55] | The program says that you should invest in a bar? | 计划说你应该投资酒吧吗 |
| [08:58] | No, it says be of service, | 不 计划说为人服务 |
| [09:00] | help others, get out of self. | 帮助别人 别只顾自己 |
| [09:02] | I’m your best friend, man. | 我是你最好的朋友 |
| [09:05] | Let me take this ride with you. | 让我和你一起冒险吧 |
| [09:09] | Damn it, Mitch. Thank you. | 见鬼 米奇 谢谢你 |
| [09:11] | Well, I’m gonna let you two have some bro time. | 我让你们兄弟相聚吧 |
| [09:14] | That’s right. That’s back in. | 没错 又可以说了 |
| [09:17] | I’m gonna go work on my mini TED talk. | 我去练练我的短Ted演讲 |
| [09:19] | Topic, people who dress up in spandex to ride their bike. | 主题 穿紧身衣骑自行车的人 |
| [09:21] | Why can’t I run them over? | 我为什么不能开车碾死他们 |
| [09:25] | This is incredible! | 太棒了 |
| [09:26] | We’re actually getting to work together again. | 我们能再次合作了 |
| [09:28] | – The boys are back! – Yeah! | -兄弟团回来了 -是的 |
| [09:29] | You cool if I have a beer to celebrate? | 你不介意我喝点啤酒庆祝吧 |
| [09:31] | – I would be pissed if you didn’t. – I got to hand it to you, | -你不喝我会生气的 -我必须称赞你 |
| [09:33] | you figuring out a way to get Bonnie to not be mad at you– | 你想出了让邦妮不生你气的方法 |
| [09:36] | you do a TED Talk on that, let me know. | 如果你做了相关的Ted演讲 一定要告诉我 |
| [09:38] | It’s the magic of being on the same path. | 这是走同一条路的魔力 |
| [09:42] | You’re smoking weed? I thought you were sober. | 你在抽大麻 我以为你戒瘾了 |
| [09:45] | I am. | 我是戒了 |
| [09:49] | California sober. | 加州式戒瘾 |
| [09:52] | That’s a thing? | 有这回事吗 |
| [09:53] | It’s totally a thing. | 完全有 |
| [09:54] | I d– I don’t– I don’t drink at all. | 我滴酒不沾 |
| [09:56] | But how can you be sober if you’re smoking? | 但如果你抽大麻 怎么能算戒瘾呢 |
| [09:58] | So, uh, 20 grand enough to get things rolling? | 两万美元够运营吗 |
| [10:01] | Let me get you an ashtray. | 我去给你拿烟灰缸 |
| [10:07] | All right. Here we go. | 好 开始 |
| [10:09] | Quiet the mind. | 摒除杂念 |
| [10:11] | Yepper-dee-doo. | 好滴哟 |
| [10:12] | Why did I say that? | 我为什么这样说 |
| [10:13] | That’s not a quiet mind. | 这不算摒除杂念 |
| [10:16] | Okay, here we go. | 好 开始 |
| [10:19] | Ooh, can’t forget that eye appointment on Thursday. | 不能忘记周四预约的眼科检查 |
| [10:23] | Stop it. | 停下 |
| [10:27] | I come from a land down under. | 我来自澳洲 |
| [10:29] | Where the hell did that come from? | 这是从哪冒出来的 |
| [10:32] | My knees hurt when I sit like this. | 我这样坐着膝盖疼 |
| [10:35] | That’s probably cancer. | 可能是癌症 |
| [10:36] | Can you get knee cancer? | 有膝癌吗 |
| [10:38] | Christy Plunkett, | 克丽丝蒂·普兰科特 |
| [10:40] | you are terrible at this. | 你太差了 |
| [10:42] | That was my seventh grade science teacher. | 那是我七年级的科学老师 |
| [10:44] | What’s he doing in here? | 他怎么会在 |
| [10:46] | Oh, I never left. | 我从没离开过 |
| [10:49] | Great. | 很好 |
| [10:50] | I’m mentally ill, | 我有精神病 |
| [10:51] | and I have knee cancer. | 而且我有膝癌 |
| [10:55] | Hey, check it out. | 看看 |
| [10:56] | I ordered a new sign, and the guy mocked up | 我订了个新招牌 那人模拟了 |
| [10:58] | what it’s gonna look like on the building. | 在大楼上的预览效果图 |
| [10:59] | Ooh, a neon barrel. | 霓虹灯酒桶 |
| [11:01] | That’ll really draw a crowd. | 那会吸引一群人的 |
| [11:02] | Yeah, and look at the negative space. | 瞧瞧负空间 |
| [11:03] | It’s my initials. | 是我的首字母 |
| [11:04] | I’m not getting that. | 我看不懂 |
| [11:06] | What do you mean? “A” For Adam, | 你什么意思 A代表亚当 |
| [11:07] | “J” For Janikowski. | J代表贾尼考斯基啊 |
| [11:08] | I see a penis. | 我看见的是一根老二 |
| [11:09] | What? What? No, it’s clearly “A.J.” | 什么 明显是AJ |
| [11:12] | Well, either way, it’ll draw a crowd. | 不管是什么 都会吸引一群人 |
| [11:14] | Maybe two slightly different crowds. | 也许是两群不大一样的人 |
| [11:17] | It’s fun spending Mitch’s money, isn’t it? | 花米奇的钱很好玩 是吧 |
| [11:19] | You want fun? Wait’ll I put in those foamless beer taps. | 你想要好玩吗 等我装上无泡沫的啤酒龙头吧 |
| [11:22] | Ooh. And a new ice maker. | 还有新的制冰机 |
| [11:23] | Yeah, and two more PayPoint systems. | 是的 增加两个支付系统 |
| [11:24] | Yeah, and that necklace we saw at the mall. | 是啊 还有我们在商场看到的项链 |
| [11:26] | Yeah– W-Wait, what? | 是啊 等等 什么 |
| [11:27] | Come on, you got a neon penis. | 拜托 你都有霓虹灯老二了 |
| [11:30] | It’s Mitch’s money. But as soon as we get our own, | 这是米奇的钱 但等我们赚了钱 |
| [11:33] | you can get a much smaller version of that same necklace. | 你可以买一条超小版的同款项链 |
| [11:37] | It’s crazy. | 真疯狂 |
| [11:39] | Last time he was here, | 上次他过来时 |
| [11:40] | he was so loaded, he couldn’t stand up. | 烂醉如泥 都站不起来了 |
| [11:42] | – Now he’s a new man. – Mm-hmm. | -现在他是个全新的人了 -嗯 |
| [11:44] | Getting clean gave me a second chance in life, | 戒瘾让我获得了人生中第二次机会 |
| [11:47] | it’s giving him a second chance, | 也给了他第二次机会 |
| [11:48] | and now it’s giving your bar a second chance. | 现在给了你的酒吧第二次机会 |
| [11:50] | That is the power of sobriety. | 那就是戒瘾的力量 |
| [11:54] | Yay, sobriety. | 真棒啊 戒瘾 |
| [12:02] | Adam’s new sign went up today. | 亚当的新招牌今天挂上了 |
| [12:04] | What do you see? | 你们觉得这是什么 |
| [12:05] | – Penis. – Penis. | -老二 -老二 |
| [12:07] | AJ A.J. | |
| [12:07] | Penis. | 老二 |
| [12:10] | We see what we want to see. | 我们心中是什么 就看到了什么 |
| [12:12] | I so want to see a penis. | 我好想看到老二啊 |
| [12:15] | Not yours, Barry. Keep moving. | 不是你的 巴里 走吧 |
| [12:18] | I was hoping Mitch was coming. | 我还希望米奇也来呢 |
| [12:20] | I wanted to tell him he inspired me to try meditating | 我想告诉他 他鼓励了我尝试冥想 |
| [12:22] | and I’m a new woman. | 我现在焕然一新了 |
| [12:23] | 20 minutes in the morning, 20 minutes at night, | 早上20分钟 晚上20分钟 |
| [12:25] | and I haven’t had to go to the shooting range once. | 我一次都没必要去射击场了 |
| [12:29] | Wait, what? | 等等 什么 |
| [12:30] | You’re meditating and it’s working? | 你在冥想 那起作用了吗 |
| [12:31] | Yeah, easy-peasy. | 是啊 小菜一碟 |
| [12:33] | And you only hear your own voice in your head? | 你在脑海里只听见了你自己的声音吗 |
| [12:35] | Well, who else’s voice would I be hearing? | 我还会听到谁的声音啊 |
| [12:37] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
| [12:38] | Maybe your seventh grade teacher you had a crush on | 也许是你暗恋的七年级老师 |
| [12:41] | until you saw him at the grocery store with his wife | 直到你看见他和他老婆逛杂货店 |
| [12:43] | and then you cried for three weeks. | 然后你哭了三个星期 |
| [12:45] | Mr. Borger? | 波格老师吗 |
| [12:46] | I slept with that guy. You weren’t missing anything. | 我跟他上过床 你没错过什么 |
| [12:51] | The trick to meditating is to develop a routine. | 冥想的诀窍是养成习惯 |
| [12:53] | After a 45-minute massage, some chamomile tea, | 经历45分钟的按摩 喝点甘菊茶 |
| [12:56] | and a long soak in the hot tub, | 再舒服地泡个长长的热水澡后 |
| [12:58] | I go to my meditation room, | 我去我的冥想室 |
| [12:59] | get on top of some of my big floor pillows, | 坐在我的大地板枕上 |
| [13:01] | and just doze off. | 打瞌睡 |
| [13:03] | That’s not meditating. | 那不叫冥想 |
| [13:04] | That’s taking a nap. | 那是睡午觉 |
| [13:06] | Oh, what do you know? | 你知道什么 |
| [13:07] | You can’t even do it. | 你根本都做不到 |
| [13:12] | Look at this! | 瞧瞧 |
| [13:13] | It’s packed! | 好多人 |
| [13:14] | The new sign’s working, babe. | 新招牌起作用了 宝贝 |
| [13:16] | The giant penis in the sky! | 天空中的大老二 |
| [13:18] | If you erect it, they will come! | 如果你勃起 他们就会来[高潮] |
| [13:21] | This is for my pappy! | 敬我的老爹 |
| [13:25] | – What’s going on? – Uh-oh. | -怎么回事 -不好 |
| [13:27] | We may not have gotten along on this Earth, | 我们在地球上处不大来 |
| [13:29] | but we’ll be drinking buddies in hell. | 但我们在地狱里会是酒友 |
| [13:32] | – To Pappy! – To Pappy! | -敬老爹 -敬老爹 |
| [13:35] | Oh, my God, he’s loaded. | 天啊 他喝醉了 |
| [13:36] | He relapsed. | 他酒瘾复发了 |
| [13:38] | This is all my fault. | 这全怪我 |
| [13:39] | What was I thinking, asking him to invest in a bar? | 我在想什么呢 让他投资一家酒吧 |
| [13:42] | Hey, look! | 瞧 |
| [13:44] | There’s my bar partner. | 是我的酒吧搭档 |
| [13:46] | My bartner! | 我的酒档 |
| [13:47] | What the hell is going on, Mitch? | 怎么回事 米奇 |
| [13:49] | Mm, I’m trying to hug you, but it’s-it’s hard, | 我想拥抱你 但是好难 |
| [13:52] | ’cause of the chair. | 因为这个轮椅 |
| [13:54] | How do you do it? | 你怎么做的 |
| [13:55] | Let’s get you some coffee. | 我们给你倒点咖啡吧 |
| [13:56] | Coffee? | 咖啡 |
| [13:58] | Innkeeper! | 客栈老板 |
| [14:00] | Work your alchemy! | 施展魔力吧 |
| [14:03] | I met these guys in the bar at my hotel. | 我是在我酒店的酒吧里遇到这些家伙的 |
| [14:05] | They all work in insurance. | 他们都在保险业工作 |
| [14:06] | Can you imagine? Kill me now. | 你能想象吗 杀了我吧 |
| [14:09] | What happened to California sober? | 说好的加州式戒瘾呢 |
| [14:10] | “California sober”? | 加州式戒瘾 |
| [14:12] | You know, he gets high but doesn’t drink. | 就是他嗑药 但是不喝酒 |
| [14:13] | That’s not a thing. | 根本没这回事 |
| [14:14] | You told me it was a thing. | 你告诉我有这么回事 |
| [14:15] | You knew it wasn’t a thing. | 你知道没这回事 |
| [14:17] | W… Wait, | 等等 |
| [14:19] | you knew he was smoking pot and you didn’t tell me? | 你知道他在吸大麻 而你都没告诉我吗 |
| [14:21] | Well, by that time, we were partners, | 那时候我们是搭档 |
| [14:23] | and then I ordered my penis sign. | 然后我订了老二招牌 |
| [14:25] | This is for my old ma! | 这杯敬老妈 |
| [14:29] | May she rest in peace, | 愿她安息 |
| [14:31] | whenever she dies. | 在她死的时候 |
| [14:33] | She’s in a home. | 她在养老院 |
| [14:34] | I can’t go. It’s too depressing. | 我不能去 太压抑了 |
| [14:36] | To Ma! | 敬老妈 |
| [14:40] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [14:41] | Quiet the mind, | 摒除杂念 |
| [14:43] | quiet the mind. | 摒除杂念 |
| [14:46] | A peaceful lake. | 一个平静的湖泊 |
| [14:49] | A gentle breeze. | 一阵微风 |
| [14:54] | Is this it? | 就这样吗 |
| [14:55] | Am I doing it? | 我在冥想了吗 |
| [14:58] | Look at me. I’m doing it. | 瞧我 我在冥想了 |
| [15:00] | Suck it, Jill. | 去死吧 吉尔 |
| [15:05] | Mitch! | 米奇 |
| [15:06] | Bonnie! | 邦妮 |
| [15:08] | Bonnie’s daughter! | 邦妮的女儿 |
| [15:11] | And I’m no longer doing it. | 我不再冥想了 |
| [15:14] | Hello?! | 有人吗 |
| [15:16] | Coming! | 来了 |
| [15:19] | Bonnie’s daughter! | 邦妮的女儿 |
| [15:21] | Oh! I’ve missed you so much! | 我好想你 |
| [15:25] | You have? | 是吗 |
| [15:26] | Don’t you remember? | 你不记得吗 |
| [15:27] | We were gonna stay in touch and be friends. | 我们要保持联系 做朋友 |
| [15:29] | I texted you, like, a million, jillion times. | 我给你发了超多条短信 |
| [15:32] | I never gave you my number. | 我没给你我的号码 |
| [15:37] | Must’ve been a different Teresa. | 肯定是另一个特蕾莎 |
| [15:40] | How ’bout you let go of me now? | 你现在放开我怎么样 |
| [15:41] | Oh. Sorry. | 抱歉 |
| [15:43] | Sorry, Teresa. | 抱歉 特蕾莎 |
| [15:46] | I got to be honest with you, | 我得跟你说实话 |
| [15:49] | I’ve had a few drinks. | 我喝了几杯 |
| [15:52] | Yes, I know. | 我知道 |
| [15:54] | I think I got drunk from our hug. | 你抱我后我都醉了 |
| [15:56] | Wouldn’t it be great if it worked that way? | 如果那样的话就太好了是吧 |
| [16:01] | Anyway, | 总之 |
| [16:03] | thanks for coming over. | 感谢你过来 |
| [16:07] | You came over here. | 是你过来的 |
| [16:08] | And please tell me you didn’t drive. | 拜托告诉我你没开车 |
| [16:10] | No, no, I boobered. | 不 我靠胸过来的 |
| [16:12] | That’s when you get in a cab and you show the driver your boobs | 就是你上出租车 给司机看胸 |
| [16:16] | instead of paying. | 而不是付钱 |
| [16:18] | Where’s Mitch?! | 米奇在哪 |
| [16:21] | He owes me money! | 他欠我钱 |
| [16:24] | And why are you sleeping with him, | 你为什么跟他上床 |
| [16:26] | you nasty skank?! | 你这个烂货 |
| [16:29] | How’d we get here? | 怎么成了这样[怎么过来的] |
| [16:31] | I told you! | 我跟你说过了 |
| [16:32] | Boober! | 靠胸 |
| [16:36] | I’m s– I’m sorry. | 对不起 |
| [16:37] | Sambuca makes me mean. | 萨姆布卡酒让我很刻薄 |
| [16:40] | You want some? | 你想来点吗 |
| [16:42] | Easy, easy. | 轻点 轻点 |
| [16:43] | It’s a $1,200 sweater. | 这毛衣要1200美元呢 |
| [16:46] | You were never sober, were you? | 你从未戒瘾 是吧 |
| [16:47] | Sure, I was. | 我戒过 |
| [16:48] | When I was nine. | 在我九岁的时候 |
| [16:51] | You went to a meeting with us! | 你跟我们参加互助会了 |
| [16:52] | Why’d you lie? | 你为什么撒谎 |
| [16:54] | I want you to like me. | 我希望你喜欢我 |
| [16:57] | Is it working? | 起作用了吗 |
| [17:02] | Stanley Tucci gave me this sweater! | 这件毛衣是斯坦利·图齐送我的 |
| [17:06] | The Tooch! | 图图 |
| [17:08] | Larry said you didn’t charge any of those people for their drinks. | 拉里说你没收那些人的酒钱 |
| [17:10] | What are you doing? | 你在干什么 |
| [17:11] | Listen to me, listen to me. | 听我说 听我说 |
| [17:14] | Listen to me. | 听我说 |
| [17:16] | – We’re listening! – I have an idea. | -我们在听呢 -我有个点子 |
| [17:19] | I was in a bar in Prague, | 我去过布拉格的一家酒吧 |
| [17:21] | and they had hookers. | 里面有妓女 |
| [17:23] | And people seemed to like it. | 人们似乎很喜欢 |
| [17:30] | Oh, great. My first brawl. | 真棒 酒吧的第一次斗殴 |
| [17:33] | I’m just saying, | 我只是说 |
| [17:34] | no one fights in a hooker bar. | 没人会在有妓女的酒吧里斗殴 |
| [17:38] | Mitch, you miserable prick! | 米奇 你这个可悲的混蛋 |
| [17:40] | You broke my heart! | 你伤了我的心 |
| [17:42] | That’s not Mitch! | 那不是米奇 |
| [17:43] | I’m not Mitch. | 我不是米奇 |
| [17:45] | You’re not Mitch. | 你不是米奇 |
| [17:47] | What’s she doing here? | 她怎么来了 |
| [17:48] | She showed up at our apartment looking for Mitch. | 她来了我们家找米奇 |
| [17:50] | I figured if I brought her down here, | 我想着如果我带她过来 |
| [17:51] | she’d cease to be my problem. | 她就不再是我的问题了 |
| [17:55] | Forget about Mitch. | 别管米奇了 |
| [17:56] | I like you now. | 我现在喜欢你 |
| [17:58] | Everybody, I like Not Mitch! | 各位 我喜欢这个不是米奇的人 |
| [18:03] | And now she’s his problem. | 现在她是他的问题了 |
| [18:05] | Oh, I feel so safe here. | 我感觉好安全 |
| [18:07] | What are we drinking? | 我们在喝什么 |
| [18:11] | I can’t believe I fell for this again. | 难以置信我又信了 |
| [18:12] | Well, to be fair, | 公平地说 |
| [18:14] | I am a Hollywood-level liar. | 我是好莱坞级别的骗子 |
| [18:16] | Well, I should know better, | 我该知道的 |
| [18:17] | because I’m whatever’s worse than Hollywood. | 因为我比好莱坞还烂 |
| [18:20] | Nothing’s worse than Hollywood. | 没什么比好莱坞还烂 |
| [18:22] | As much as I want to strangle you right now, | 虽然我现在很想勒死你 |
| [18:24] | I can’t, because I am you. | 但我做不到 因为我就是你 |
| [18:27] | Well, I was you. | 我曾是你 |
| [18:29] | A drunk tornado ripping through people’s lives. | 一阵喝醉的龙卷风 破坏人们的生活 |
| [18:32] | They wanted me to direct Sharknado 3. | 他们想让我导演《鲨卷风3》 |
| [18:35] | Shut up! | 闭嘴 |
| [18:36] | I’m taking the high road, you toxic cesspool! | 我在发扬好作风 你这个有毒的粪坑 |
| [18:48] | What I meant to say was… | 我想说的是 |
| [18:51] | …as long as you’re drinking, | 只要你在喝酒 |
| [18:53] | I don’t want you in our lives. | 我就不希望你进入我们的生活 |
| [18:56] | No calling, no e-mailing, no texting. | 别打电话 别发邮件 别发短信 |
| [18:58] | What about Chapsnatch? | 那焚后即阅呢[米奇喝醉了 说反了] |
| [19:01] | Nothing. No contact. | 什么都不行 不要联系 |
| [19:04] | But if you ever sincerely want help… | 但如果你真的想要人帮忙 |
| [19:10] | I’ll be here for you. | 我会陪着你 |
| [19:15] | I see where this is going. | 我明白是怎么回事了 |
| [19:20] | Who’s a pretty pony? | 谁是漂亮的小马 |
| [19:26] | Adam. | 亚当 |
| [19:31] | You were always the good one. | 你总是好人 |
| [19:34] | Why’d I stop sleeping with you? | 我为什么不再跟你上床了 |
| [19:36] | What happened to us? | 那我们呢 |
| [19:38] | Give her a minute. She’ll come back. | 稍等一会 她会回来的 |
| [19:40] | What’s your name? | 你叫什么 |
| [19:43] | Leanne, y-you got to get off me. | 琳恩 你得放开我 |
| [19:45] | My fiancée has a temper. | 我未婚妻脾气很大 |
| [19:47] | Adam! | 亚当 |
| [19:49] | Bonnie hit me! | 邦妮打了我 |
| [19:51] | See? | 瞧 |
| [19:53] | Mitch! | 米奇 |
| [19:55] | Leanne?! | 琳恩 |
| [19:58] | Why’d she hit you? | 她为什么打了你 |
| [20:00] | No reason. | 没什么原因 |
| [20:01] | Seriously? We should all be hitting him. | 真的吗 我们都该打他 |
| [20:05] | You poor thing. | 你这小可怜 |
| [20:06] | I know, right? | 就是啊 |
| [20:08] | I miss you. | 我想你 |
| [20:11] | I love you. | 我爱你 |
| [20:13] | I love you, too. | 我也爱你 |
| [20:17] | Let’s make a baby. | 我们造小孩吧 |
| [20:18] | It’s true love. | 这是真爱 |
| [20:23] | What’s wrong with me that I’m jealous of them? | 我有什么毛病啊 居然嫉妒他们 |
| [20:33] | Cosmopolitan, you’ve done it again. | 《时尚》 你又做到了 |
| [20:37] | Believe it or not, this time, | 随你信不信 这次是 |
| [20:38] | Redbook. | 《红皮书》 |
| [20:41] | – Really? – Yep. | -真的吗 -是啊 |
| [20:42] | Right next to an article about one-pot winter meals. | 就在一篇关于冬季大乱炖的文章旁边 |
| [20:49] | I love you. | 我爱你 |
| [20:50] | I love you, too. | 我也爱你 |
| [20:51] | Mitch’s check bounced. | 米奇的支票被拒了 |
| [20:54] | Go again. | 再来一次 |