时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:07] | Alright, Terry, I’m switching on the Neutronium Diode. | 特里 我要打开中子态二极管了 |
[00:09] | This thing’s a temperamental little slut | 这玩意是个喜怒无常的小婊子 |
[00:11] | so be ready to cut the power source ASAP. | 所以准备好尽快切断电源 |
[00:13] | – As Shlorpian as possible. – Gotcha, buddy! | -以什洛普星人的最快速度 -收到 哥们 |
[00:16] | Oh! Terry, turn it off! | 特里 关掉 |
[00:18] | Terry! Do it now! Ow, fucking ow, ow, ow, fuck! | 特里 快关掉 操 操 |
[00:20] | Terry! Fuck! Ow! Terry! Ow! Terry! | 特里 操 特里 特里 |
[00:24] | Gotcha, buddy! | 收到 哥们 |
[00:25] | Gotcha, buddy! Gotcha, buddy! | 收到 哥们 收到 哥们 |
[00:27] | Gotcha, buddy! | 收到 哥们 |
[00:32] | Oh crap, I forgot about Korvo! | 该死 我忘了科尔沃了 |
[00:35] | Help, Terry. I think I’m dying. | 救命 特里 我好想要死了 |
[00:37] | Please, cancel my subscription to Goop. | 拜托 取消我在顾普的订阅 |
[00:39] | Oh god, oh no, I’m so sorry, Korv. | 天 不 真抱歉 小科 |
[00:41] | Now-now is it the green button or the yellow one. | 是绿色按钮还是黄色的 |
[00:43] | I’m such a Forgetful Frankie Muniz. | 我真是个健忘的弗兰基·穆尼兹 |
[00:45] | That’s not a joke, he had a serious head injury. | 这不是玩笑 他头部受过重伤 |
[00:52] | Terry, I’m gonna ask you one time and you better not lie: | 特里 我再问你一次 你最好别撒谎 |
[00:55] | did you abandon your post and go to Disneyland? | 你抛下了你的岗位去了迪士尼乐园吗 |
[00:56] | What? No, I was– | 什么 没有 我 |
[00:59] | I got these at Target. | 这是我在塔吉特百货买的 |
[01:00] | I know for a fact they don’t sell those at Target. | 我知道塔吉特百货不卖这个 |
[01:02] | Online they do. Black Friday deal, got an email. | 网上有卖 黑色星期五打折的 有收到邮件 |
[01:03] | Dammit, it probably went to my spam. | 该死 可能进了垃圾邮箱了 |
[01:05] | Fucking Hulumail sucks. Will you forward it to me? | Hulu邮箱烂死了 你能转发给我吗 |
[01:08] | I’d have to get back to you. Let’s get you down from there. | 晚点再说 我先把你放下来 |
[01:10] | Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit! | 见鬼 见鬼 |
[01:11] | Which button is it again? | 是哪个按钮来着 |
[01:13] | – Which button is it? – Terry! | -哪个按钮 -特里 |
[01:15] | Planet Shlorp was a perfect utopia. | 什洛普星曾是个完美的乌托邦 |
[01:18] | Until the asteroid hit. | 直到被小行星撞上 |
[01:20] | One hundred adults and their replicants were issued a Pupa | 一百个成人以及他们的复制人分到了一只噗噗 |
[01:23] | and escaped into, uh, the space, | 逃往了太空 |
[01:25] | searching for new homes on uninhabited worlds. | 在杳无人迹的世界里寻找新家 |
[01:28] | We crashed on Earth, stranding us on an already overpopulated planet. | 我们坠落在地球上 困在了一个已经人口过密的星球 |
[01:31] | That’s right, I’ve been talking this whole time. | 是的 一直是我在说话 |
[01:33] | I’m the one holding the Pupa. My name’s Korvo. | 抱着噗噗的人是我 我叫科尔沃 |
[01:34] | This is– this is my show. I just dropped the Pupa. Do you see me? | 这是我的节目 我的噗噗掉了 你看到我了吗 |
[01:37] | This is ridiculous. | 这太荒唐了 |
[01:38] | I hate Earth. It’s a horrible home. | 我讨厌地球 这是个糟糕的家园 |
[01:40] | People are stupid. | 人们都笨死了 |
[01:41] | Why are they all so excited about keeping themselves alive? | 他们为什么这么热衷于让自己活着 |
[01:43] | Don’t they know when you die you come back stronger | 他们不知道死了以后 你会变得更强 |
[01:45] | and with an earthier flavor? | 散发更朴实的味道 |
[01:58] | Sigourney Weaver is your perfect Earth babe? | 西格妮·韦弗是你的完美地球宝贝吗 |
[02:01] | Uh, yeah! | 是的 |
[02:02] | She’s a woman of science, | 她是女科学家 |
[02:03] | she already has a prior relationship with aliens, | 她之前已经和外星人有过关系 |
[02:05] | and she has the biceps of a young Al Gore. | 她还有着年轻时艾伯特·戈尔的肱二头肌 |
[02:07] | She’s one handsome lady, that’s for sure. | 毫无疑问 她是个帅气的女人 |
[02:08] | I’d put a bun in that oven. | 我愿意为她生孩子 |
[02:11] | Yo, check it. This dickless dork has a poster of Sigourney Weaver! | 看 这个没屌的呆子有一张西格妮·韦弗的海报 |
[02:15] | How dare you, she’s America’s hot older aunt! | 放肆 她是美国的性感老阿姨 |
[02:17] | I know! | 我知道 |
[02:18] | Which is why you have no business | 所以你没资格 |
[02:20] | hanging a poster of her in your locker. | 在你储物柜里贴她的海报 |
[02:21] | She tried to save the Na’vi while making smoking look cool again. | 她试图在让抽烟酷起来的同时拯救纳美族 |
[02:24] | What the fuck did you ever do? | 你他妈做过什么 |
[02:25] | You will never be strong enough, cool enough, | 你永远不会足够强大 足够酷 |
[02:28] | or confident enough to get a woman like Sigi Weave. | 足够自信 得到西格·韦弗那样的女人 |
[02:32] | Principal Cooke, are you gonna do something about this bullying? | 库克校长 你要对这种霸凌做点什么吗 |
[02:35] | Yes. | 当然 |
[02:37] | Two weeks detention for thinking you could ever date | 留堂两周 你竟然觉得你能 |
[02:39] | a goddess like Sigourney Weaver! | 跟西格妮·韦弗这样的女神交往 |
[02:41] | She won a spoken-word Grammy, you piece of shit! | 她赢得过格莱美最佳诵读专辑 垃圾 |
[02:44] | – You okay? – What? Of course. Are you okay? | -你还好吗 -什么 当然 你还好吗 |
[02:47] | I am super, capital S. | 我好极了 |
[02:49] | I thought Stacy K. Flicked a booger at me in math | 我以为斯黛西·K在数学课上朝我弹了一坨鼻屎 |
[02:51] | but turns out it was just an eraser, | 结果发现是橡皮擦 |
[02:53] | so I guess we’re BFFs now. | 我想我们现在算是闺蜜了 |
[02:54] | Jesus, Jesse, stop badgering me! | 老天 杰茜 别再烦我了 |
[02:56] | Fine, I’m not okay! Is that what you want to hear? | 行 我不好 这是你想听的吗 |
[02:59] | I just, I want to destroy those cool kids, | 我只想毁掉那些酷小孩 |
[03:01] | but Korvo deactivated all the awesome weapons in my suit. | 但科尔沃解除了我衣服里所有优秀的武器 |
[03:03] | You know what you should do? | 你知道你该做什么吗 |
[03:04] | Go to a gym, start lifting weights, maybe some CrossFit | 去健身房 开始举铁 或许练习全面健身 |
[03:07] | and then when you’re all swole and shit, | 然后当你身体壮大后 |
[03:09] | you can come back and beat up all those cool kids. | 你就可以回来 揍那些酷小孩 |
[03:11] | You really think that would work? | 你真觉得这能行吗 |
[03:12] | Totally! So you’re gonna take my idea and hit the gym? | 当然 所以你要听我主意去健身吗 |
[03:15] | Hell, no, your ideas suck. | 当然不 你的主意烂死了 |
[03:16] | I know exactly what I’m gonna do. | 我知道我该怎么办了 |
[03:18] | They’ll never see it coming! | 他们绝对想不到 |
[03:19] | – Don’t say poisonous– – Poisonous snakes! | -别说毒… -毒蛇 |
[03:22] | Hola, Korvito! I got you some Texi-Mexi from Pedro’s | 你好 科尔沃 我给你从佩德罗餐厅买了些墨西哥菜 |
[03:25] | to say sorry for that little thing earlier. | 为之前的小事道歉 |
[03:27] | I scored you a bunch of salsa! | 我给你拿了很多沙司 |
[03:29] | Terry, for the last time, salsa is not a real apology. | 特里 我最后说一次 沙司不算真正的道歉 |
[03:32] | And you know the only food I like eating at those Mexican restaurants | 你也知道我在那些墨西哥餐厅唯一喜欢吃的 |
[03:34] | are those sliced radishes! | 就是萝卜片 |
[03:36] | More for me! Hey, so what’s this bad boy all about? | 那我能吃更多了 这玩意是什么 |
[03:38] | Don’t touch. This “bad boy” can send warranty letters | 别碰 这玩意可以把保单 |
[03:41] | back to the factory on Shlorp that made the Diode in the first place. | 发回什洛普星上当初制作二极管的工厂 |
[03:44] | Wait, didn’t Shlorp blow up like a new Lizzo single? Topical. | 什洛普星不是像Lizzo新单一样爆了吗 紧跟时事 |
[03:47] | Yes, but this uses a temporal address | 是的 但这个使用当时的地址 |
[03:49] | that can send the letter back in time | 可以把信送回过去 |
[03:51] | to before Shlorp went boom-boom-pow. | 送到什洛普星”崩崩崩”之前 |
[03:53] | I was trying to piggyback on-on-on your, on your reference to music. | 我是想模仿你的音乐梗 |
[03:57] | Then they’ll be able to fix this defect | 那样他们就能在它离开工厂前 |
[03:59] | before it even leaves the factory. | 就修好这个缺陷 |
[04:01] | Now sit back and watch Korvo | 坐好了 看科尔沃 |
[04:03] | as he… fixes everything. | 修好一切 |
[04:12] | We got another complaint about the defect | 我们又接到关于魔域6915号二极管的 |
[04:14] | on Diode number zork-6915. | 缺陷投诉了 |
[04:17] | And also, who keeps eating my lunch? | 还有 谁老是吃我的午饭 |
[04:19] | Seriously. It has my name on it, guys. | 我说真的 上面明明写了我名字 |
[04:20] | Stop fucking smiling, Grant, I know it’s you! | 别他妈笑了 格兰特 我知道是你 |
[04:27] | Oh, I get it, so this mailbox works just like the one | 我懂了 这个邮箱就像桑迪·布洛克 |
[04:29] | from the Sandy Bullock tear-jerker The Lake House. | 那部催泪电影《触不到的恋人》里的邮箱 |
[04:31] | First, her God given name is Sandra, show some respect. | 首先 她叫桑德拉 尊重点 |
[04:35] | And second, this is a highly scientific, carefully calibrated portal | 其次 这是一个高度科学 精心校准的通道 |
[04:38] | that acts as a quantum time travel customer service line. | 作为量子时间旅行客户服务线 |
[04:41] | It’s not “like” some crappy movie nobody’s ever seen. | 并不像某个没人看过的破电影里的东西 |
[04:44] | First, not a crappy movie. | 一 这不是破电影 |
[04:45] | Two, everybody’s seen it. | 二 人人都看过 |
[04:47] | And three, it’s basically the thing from the movie! | 三 这东西就跟电影里的一样 |
[04:49] | Goddammit, Terry, it’s nothing like The Lake House! | 该死 特里 这跟《触不到的恋人》不一样 |
[04:54] | So it’s a little exactly like The Lake House. | 所以跟《触不到的恋人》确实一样 |
[04:56] | Told ya! | 我就说吧 |
[04:57] | Maybe now you’ll finally believe | 现在你或许终于会相信 |
[04:58] | that I saw a “The Meg” when I went snorkeling. | 我去浮潜的时候看到了”巨齿鲨” |
[05:00] | Oh my god, you did not see a “The Meg.” | 我的天 你没看到巨齿鲨 |
[05:03] | Let’s get back to work, | 我们回去干活吧 |
[05:04] | and you need to clean up the popcorn you spilled | 你得把你在基努脱掉衣服时 |
[05:06] | when Keanu took his shirt off. | 喷出的爆米花给清理了 |
[05:07] | Yeah, no thanks on the whole “getting back to work” plan. | 我才不要参与你的”回去干活”计划 |
[05:09] | Instead, I’m gonna crush a big bag of Buffalo-flavored Snickers | 相反 我要一边吃一大袋布法罗鸡翅味的士力架 |
[05:12] | while I lay here and fart. | 一边躺在这里放屁 |
[05:14] | Terry, straight-up, real talk, | 特里 不开玩笑 |
[05:15] | why are you such a lazy piece of shit? | 你为什么如此懒惰 |
[05:17] | Great question, KV. I was grown this way. | 问得好 KV 我从小就这样 |
[05:19] | I’ve been lazy all my life, ever since I was a little replicant | 我一辈子都很懒 自从我还是个小复制人 |
[05:22] | birddogging thotties on the playground. | 在游乐场里追踪骚货时起就是了 |
[05:23] | Just me and the thots. | 就我和骚货们 |
[05:24] | Wouldn’t you rather be like me, | 你难道不想成为我吗 |
[05:25] | rule following, hardworking, slim. | 遵循规矩 勤勤恳恳 苗条 |
[05:28] | Basically fucking amazing. | 也就是超级棒 |
[05:29] | Look, nothing and no one at this present time and space | 听着 此时此地没有什么东西或者人 |
[05:32] | is gwan change me. | 可以改变我 |
[05:33] | You can’t change me, you can’t change me– | 你改变不了我 你改变不了我 |
[05:35] | This gives me a very specific idea. | 这让我有一个很具体的主意 |
[05:38] | Computer, activate AISHA. | 电脑 激活阿伊莎 |
[05:39] | Korvo, make it quick, you know I’m watchin’ my stories. | 科尔沃 快点 你知道我在看我的故事 |
[05:42] | If I were to change the address on the letter | 如果我改变我通过《触不到的恋人》设备 |
[05:44] | I send through The Lake House device , | 发出的信的地址 |
[05:45] | will it get delivered to any Shlorpian in the past? | 会送到过去的什洛普星吗 |
[05:47] | Technically, yes, | 严格来说 可以 |
[05:49] | but non-warranty time travel voids the warranty. | 但是保修期外的时间旅行让保修变无效 |
[05:51] | Hmmm, I do like warranties. But it’s worth a shot. | 我喜欢保单 但值得一试 |
[05:56] | Dearest Young Terry, I pray this letter finds you well… | 亲爱的年轻特里 我祈祷这封信能到达你手里 |
[06:07] | My sincere hope is that you will dedicate your life to science | 我真诚希望你会把毕生精力献给科学 |
[06:10] | and cleaning up and not being such a lazy piece of shit. | 以及清洁 而不是做个懒惰的垃圾 |
[06:13] | The truth is, if you don’t do those things, | 事实是 如果你不做这些事 |
[06:15] | your blood will turn into shlorbats. | 你的血将会变成什洛普蝙蝠 |
[06:17] | You know what they are. Your friend, mystery person. | 你知道那是什么 你的朋友 神秘之人 |
[06:21] | I’d better stop being lazy! | 我最好停止懒惰 |
[06:23] | Sorry, Yum, I’m fresh out of the super poisonous snakes. | 抱歉 雅姆 我刚卖完剧毒的蛇 |
[06:25] | What else you got, Derek? | 你还有什么 德里克 |
[06:27] | These platypi got stingers in ’em that emit a poison | 这些鸭嘴兽有刺可以释放 |
[06:29] | that can seriously fuck somebody up. | 让人痛不欲生的剧毒 |
[06:31] | Really? They look so cute. | 是吗 它们看上去好可爱 |
[06:33] | Cute? Check this. Rodney tests all my shit. Yo, Rod! | 可爱 看好了 罗德尼测试我的所有毒素 阿罗 |
[06:37] | Show ’em, Ney. | 给他们看看 尼 |
[06:42] | Sweet! I’ll take ’em. | 不错 我要了 |
[06:45] | Good morning, sleepy-peepy! | 早上好 瞌睡虫 |
[06:46] | – You just getting up? – Yes. | -你刚起来 -是的 |
[06:48] | Ha-have you been getting a jump start on the day? | 你今天提前开始了吗 |
[06:50] | You know it, my man! | 是啊 哥们 |
[06:51] | I already did all the work on the ship, | 我已经完成了飞船上的所有工作 |
[06:53] | cleaned the house, folded the laundry. | 打扫了房子 叠了衣服 |
[06:54] | You know what they say, if you’re a lazy piece of shit, | 俗话说 如果你是个懒惰的垃圾 |
[06:56] | your blood will turn to bats! | 你的血将会变成蝙蝠 |
[06:58] | Holy fuck, The Lake House device worked! | 我嘞个去 《触不到的恋人》设备起作用了 |
[07:01] | This is a lot of power, gotta be careful about not abusing it. | 这威力很大 得小心点 不要滥用 |
[07:06] | Are you eating Honey Nut Hulios with a fork? | 你在用叉子吃甜甜圈吗 |
[07:08] | Uh, yeah, that’s how you eat them. | 嗯 就该这么吃 |
[07:10] | I’m sorry if it’s annoying. | 抱歉如果这很烦人 |
[07:11] | I like the feeling of the tines on my teeth. | 我喜欢叉子尖头碰到我牙齿的感觉 |
[07:13] | Ugh. I’ll be right back. | 我马上回来 |
[07:21] | Korvo, just finishing eating my cereal with a spoon | 科尔沃 我像正常人一样 |
[07:24] | like a normal person. | 用勺子吃我的麦片 |
[07:25] | Hey, after I’m done, do you want to spend all afternoon | 吃完后 你想花一整个下午 |
[07:27] | ranking our favorite buttons on the ship? | 为我们在飞船上最爱的按钮排序吗 |
[07:28] | I mean, number one has to be laser number 17. | 第一名必须是激光17号 |
[07:31] | But number two… who fucking knows! | 但第二名 谁知道呢 |
[07:34] | I would love to. | 我很乐意 |
[07:37] | Ow! Stop! Ow, heel, bitches! | 停下 脚后跟 贱人们 |
[07:41] | When you’re all swole and shit, | 当你身体壮大后 |
[07:42] | you can come back and beat up all those cool kids. | 你就可以回来 揍那些酷小孩 |
[07:45] | That’s a good idea– ow! | 那是个好主意 |
[07:47] | Fuck you, platypussies! | 去你妈的 鸭嘴兽逼 |
[07:52] | Hello, my name is Yumyulack. Yeah, I know it’s a dope name. | 你好 我叫雅姆莱克 我知道这名字很酷 |
[07:55] | I need to get super jacked and swole with lots of muscles and confidence | 我需要练得很壮 有很多肌肉 充满自信 |
[07:58] | so people will respect me and I won’t feel like such a loser. | 这样人们就会尊重我 我不会感觉像个废物 |
[08:01] | So, obviously, the stakes are high. | 显然 风险很高 |
[08:03] | Oh, and it has to be done by the time school starts tomorrow. | 而且必须在明天开学之前就搞定 |
[08:05] | Wish we could help, friend, | 真希望我们能帮上忙 朋友 |
[08:06] | but we used to be losers just like you. | 但我们以前跟你一样也是废物 |
[08:09] | We thought if we just got buff then people would respect us. | 我们以为把身体练壮后人们就会尊重我们 |
[08:11] | We spent years lifting weights and shooting steroids. | 我们花了多年时间举铁 打类固醇 |
[08:14] | I literally can’t see my balls, they’ve shrunk so much. | 我已经看不到我的蛋了 缩小太多 |
[08:16] | And then there’s the acne. | 然后还会长痘 |
[08:17] | We’re taking backne, crackne, and sackne. | 背上长 屁股沟长 蛋蛋上也长 |
[08:21] | The Holy Trinity, yo. | 圣三一 |
[08:22] | But y-you guys look so confident. | 但你们看上去很自信 |
[08:23] | It’s fake, man. | 假的 |
[08:24] | Take it from me, you can’t manufacture it | 相信我 你没法用伟哥 |
[08:27] | out of a cocktail of Viagra, HGH, | 人体生长激素和乔恩·哈姆的尿 |
[08:29] | and some of Jon Hamm’s pee. | 混合制作出自信 |
[08:31] | It can’t be built in a gym. | 在健身房里是练不出来的 |
[08:33] | It has to be inside you the whole time. | 必须一直在你体内 |
[08:35] | Well, who has it then? | 那谁有呢 |
[08:37] | That guy. | 那人 |
[08:39] | That Pete Davidson-looking dork? | 那个长得像皮特·戴维森的呆子 |
[08:41] | – What does he have? – B-d-e. | -他有什么 -BDE |
[08:44] | Big Dick Energy. | 大屌能量 |
[08:47] | Holy shit! | 我嘞个去 |
[08:48] | BDE is legit. | BDE是真的 |
[08:50] | Oh yeah. But you can’t get it, you have to be born with it. | 是的 但你没法获得 只能靠天生 |
[08:53] | We’ll sci-fi see about that. | 让我们用高科技拭目以待 |
[09:05] | Hey, Yum, how’d that platypus deal work out for you? | 雅姆 那个鸭嘴兽的交易怎么样了 |
[09:08] | I bailed on it. Went to the gym. | 我放弃了 去了健身房 |
[09:09] | Oh, great. I knew I was right. | 好极了 我就知道我是对的 |
[09:11] | Nope, bailed on that too. | 不 那个我也放弃了 |
[09:12] | I’m making a large penis for myself instead. | 我要给自己做一根大屌 |
[09:14] | Wow, you’ve had quite a journey since I last saw you. | 我们上次见面后你真是经历了很多呢 |
[09:16] | It’s called Big Dick Energy and when I get it, I’ll be unstoppable. | 这叫做大屌能量 等我有了 我将不可阻挡 |
[09:19] | I don’t know, a big dick seems really dangerous. | 我不知道 一根大屌似乎很危险 |
[09:28] | Now let’s take this new big dick out for a spin. | 现在咱带这大屌出去晃一圈 |
[09:30] | Whatever you want to do is cool. | 你想做什么都很酷 |
[09:32] | Damn right, it is. | 那还用说 |
[09:47] | Yumyulack, sorry about the other day. | 雅姆莱克 前几天的事我很抱歉 |
[09:49] | Here’s a handsaw and some stuck porn | 这是我从另一个小孩那 |
[09:51] | I confiscated off another kid. | 没收来的手锯和黄片 |
[09:52] | We’re good? Yeah, w-w-we’re good. Yeah. | 我们之间没事了吧 嗯 没事了 |
[09:55] | Eh, there we go. | 好了 |
[09:56] | Finally finished washing the little guy! | 终于给这小家伙洗完了 |
[09:58] | If you don’t clean the Pupa, your blood turns to bats. | 如果你不清理噗噗 你的血就会变成蝙蝠 |
[10:00] | It’s kind of amazing how many things turn your blood to bats, you know. | 说来真是神奇 好多事情都能让你的血变成蝙蝠 |
[10:02] | Oh, ha, I know all about that. | 这我再清楚不过了 |
[10:04] | Uh, okay, so it’s time for movie night. | 好的 是时候开始电影之夜了 |
[10:07] | I thought we could screen this training video about levers. | 我想我们可以看看这个关于杠杆的训练视频 |
[10:09] | It’s-it’s very captivating. | 很吸引人 |
[10:10] | Ohhh, “F” that weak noise! | 这真是弱爆了 |
[10:12] | We’re watching all the Fast and Furious movies | 我们要按日期顺序观看所有 |
[10:14] | in chronological order! | 《速度与激情》电影 |
[10:16] | The way Vinnie Diesel intended it. | 这是范·迪塞尔想要的方式 |
[10:19] | I’ll be right back. | 我马上回来 |
[10:22] | Levers! Levers! Levers! | 杠杆 杠杆 杠杆 |
[10:25] | Levers are the best! | 杠杆最棒了 |
[10:26] | Oh, you guys are just in time for movie night. | 你们刚好赶上了电影之夜 |
[10:28] | We’re watching this awesome doc on– | 我们要看一个关于…的纪录片 |
[10:29] | Nah, fam, for once we’re watching what I want to watch, | 不了 家人 这次我要看我想看的 |
[10:32] | either YouTube clips of Russian car accidents or Paddington 2. | 要么是油管上的俄罗斯车祸视频要么是《帕丁顿熊2》 |
[10:35] | – Whatever you want. – Sounds great. | -听你的 -不错 |
[10:37] | Oh geez. BDE is real. | 天呐 BDE是真的 |
[10:39] | And it is formidable. | 而且很强大 |
[10:45] | Yo, yo, check it, this is my imitation of a guy in Fortnite. | 看啊 我是在模仿《堡垒之夜》里的一个人 |
[10:48] | Oh, I’m walking into a wall, what am I gonna do? | 我要撞到墙了 我该怎么办 |
[10:50] | Yum, your shit is L-M-A-O. | 雅姆 你真是逗死了 |
[10:53] | You’re like a real-life meme. | 你就像个现实生活中的表情包 |
[10:59] | Terry, um, could you clean and prepare all 72,000 micronauts. | 特里 你能清理并准备全部7.2万个微航员吗 |
[11:03] | I-I-I need to fix the hydrodeck? | 我得修理氢甲板 |
[11:05] | You bet your butt, Team Leader! | 没问题 老大 |
[11:30] | Don’t forget to tune in this week | 别忘了收看本周的 |
[11:32] | for Saturday Night Live | 《周六夜现场》 |
[11:34] | with host Yumyulack | 主持人是雅姆莱克 |
[11:36] | and musical guest Yumyulack! | 音乐嘉宾也是雅姆莱克 |
[11:40] | I gotta tell you, this BDE thing is hella cray-cray. | 我得跟你说 这个BDE真的很疯狂 |
[11:42] | You even made the WNBA cool. | 你甚至让WNBA变酷了 |
[11:44] | Like, to everybody. Not just me. | 对所有人来说都是 不只是我 |
[11:46] | It’s actually a better brand of basketball than the men’s game | 这其实比男子比赛更好看 |
[11:49] | ’cause they have to focus on the fundamentals. | 因为她们得专注于基础 |
[11:54] | Idris Elba? | 伊德瑞斯·艾尔巴 |
[11:55] | Star of HBO’s The Wire? | HBO《火线》的主角 |
[11:57] | I loved you in Molly’s Game! | 我喜欢你在《茉莉的牌局》里的表演 |
[11:59] | You had so many words to say , and you got almost some of them right! | 你有好多台词 你几乎说对了一部分 |
[12:02] | ‘Ello, Jesse. | 你好 杰茜 |
[12:03] | You know my name? I’m seriously going to plotz. | 你知道我名字 我要激动哭了 |
[12:06] | I know everything about you. | 我知道关于你的一切 |
[12:07] | And your boy Yumyulack here. | 还有你朋友雅姆莱克 |
[12:09] | We’ve been watching you. | 我们一直在关注你们 |
[12:10] | Who’s been watching me, Idris Elba? | 谁在关注我 伊德瑞斯·艾尔巴 |
[12:12] | The Big Dick Energy Council. | 大屌能量委员会 |
[12:14] | We are a secret and mystic fraternity, | 我们是一个隐匿神秘的兄弟会 |
[12:16] | too complicated to explain, mate– | 很难解释 哥们 |
[12:18] | Oh, let me guess, it’s like a bunch of people with big dicks? | 我猜猜 就是一群有着大屌的人 |
[12:20] | Yep, that’s pretty much it. But you have to understand, | 差不多 但你得明白 |
[12:22] | for centuries, our council has been tasked | 几个世纪以来 我们的委员会一直 |
[12:25] | with keeping a delicate balance of energy in the world, | 得维持世界中能量的微妙平衡 |
[12:28] | but your new BDE is buggering it all up. | 但你的新BDE搞乱了一切 |
[12:30] | Buggering means fucking in British. | 搞在英式英语里就是操的意思 |
[12:32] | I know what buggering means! | 我知道搞是什么意思 |
[12:33] | I came to offer you a spot on the council. | 我是来向你提供在委员会任职的机会 |
[12:36] | Christian Bale stepped down | 克里斯蒂安·贝尔退位了 |
[12:37] | after he lost all that penis weight for a movie. | 因为他为了一部电影减掉了太多屌重 |
[12:39] | You could be one of the greats, | 你有机会成为伟人之一 |
[12:41] | but only we can show you how to harness your power for good. | 但只有我们能教你怎么永远控制你的能力 |
[12:44] | My answer… is no! | 我的答案是拒绝 |
[12:46] | I don’t need you or your stupid council! | 我不需要你的破委员会 |
[12:49] | BDE is a power stronger than any man | BDE是一种别任何人都强大的能量 |
[12:51] | and if you’re not careful, it will consume you. | 如果你不小心 它将会吞噬你 |
[12:54] | Are you threatening me, Idris Elba? | 你在威胁我吗 伊德瑞斯·艾尔巴 |
[12:55] | Just keeping it real, mate. | 只是保持真实 哥们 |
[12:57] | Well, why don’t you keep this real, mate. | 你怎么不保持这个的真实 哥们 |
[12:59] | I’m gonna make a dick so big | 我要制作一根超大的屌 |
[13:00] | that you and your stupid council will be begging me to suck it! | 你和你的破委员会到时只会求我吸它 |
[13:08] | Mmm, ass smells like Luther. | 屁股闻起来像路德 |
[13:11] | Alright, this is usually when the ship starts to drag because of– | 一般这个时候飞船就会开始拖拉 因为 |
[13:14] | The effects of zero gravity but if we just– | 零重力效应 但如果我们… |
[13:16] | Accelerate the constant thrust trajectory | 加快恒定推力弹道 |
[13:17] | time dilation won’t be a problem! Yeah! | 时间膨胀将不会再是问题 耶 |
[13:21] | I gotta say, Terry. Working on the ship with you, | 我得说 特里 跟你一起修理飞船 |
[13:23] | it just makes me so happy. | 让我很开心 |
[13:24] | This is perfect. You are perfect. | 这太完美了 你很完美 |
[13:26] | Nothing more needs to be done. | 不需要再做什么了 |
[13:28] | Man, I feel the same way. I love working on sci-fi stuff with you. | 我也这么觉得 我喜欢跟你一起忙高科技的东西 |
[13:31] | It’s so tight! | 太酷了 |
[13:32] | Ech, I hate when you say that. | 我讨厌你说这话 |
[13:33] | What? “Tight”? Too bad ’cause saying tight is like | 什么 “酷” 真可惜 因为说酷 |
[13:35] | the tightest tight thing of all, | 就是最酷的事 |
[13:36] | so I’m gonna keep saying it until “lit” gets cool again. | 所以我要一直说 直到”燃”再次酷起来 |
[13:39] | Tight! Tighty-tight tight! | 酷 酷 酷 酷 |
[13:41] | I’ll be right back. | 我马上回来 |
[13:43] | This is it. Last one. | 终于最后一个了 |
[13:44] | I swear. No more after this. | 我发誓 这之后我再也不弄了 |
[13:52] | Terry, should we get back to our non-tight sci-fi stuff? | 特里 我们要继续做我们不酷的高科技东西吗 |
[13:57] | Are you okay? Terry? | 你还好吗 特里 |
[13:58] | – Come on. Come on. – Terry! | -拜托 拜托 -特里 |
[14:02] | Korvo! | 科尔沃 |
[14:04] | What are you doing? | 你在干什么 |
[14:05] | I’m hosting SNL this week, | 我这周要主持《周六夜现场》 |
[14:07] | and I need all the BDE I can summon ’cause I’m not funny! | 我需要我能召唤的所有BDE 因为我不逗 |
[14:11] | But Idris Elba told you not to mess with the BDE! | 但伊德瑞斯·艾尔巴叫你别乱用BDE的 |
[14:14] | Idris Elba doesn’t know dick from dick! | 伊德瑞斯·艾尔巴懂个鸡巴 |
[14:20] | And he sure as hell doesn’t know dick from two dicks! | 更别说两个鸡巴了 |
[14:33] | Oh fuck, I fucked up! I-I-I broke Terry. | 操 我搞砸了 我破坏了特里 |
[14:35] | Korvo! I’m gonna kill you! | 科尔沃 我要杀了你 |
[14:43] | Terry, I’m really sorry about what happened. | 特里 我对发生的事很抱歉 |
[14:44] | But don’t worry, I-I’m gonna write you a letter saying “be yourself” | 但是别担心 我会给你写封信 内容是做自己 |
[14:47] | or-or something more eloquent. | 或者更有口才的话 |
[14:49] | I-I’ll workshop it, you know, for a little while probably– | 我会研讨一段时间 |
[14:51] | I promise you will go back to being the way you were! | 我保证你会变回原来的样子 |
[14:54] | I don’t wanna change! I like who I am now! | 我不想改变 我喜欢现在的我 |
[14:56] | I like wearing women’s eye shadow and murdering you! | 我喜欢化着女人的眼影追杀你 |
[14:59] | It’s Saturday Night Live ! | 现在是《周六夜现场》 |
[15:02] | Ladies and gentlemen, your host, Yumyulack! | 女士们先生们 有请主持人 雅姆莱克 |
[15:06] | Oh my god! | 老天 |
[15:08] | Run! Everyone run! I can’t control it. | 快跑 大家快跑 我控制不住它了 |
[15:11] | Idris Elba was right. | 伊德瑞斯·艾尔巴说得没错 |
[15:13] | Idris Elba was right! | 伊德瑞斯·艾尔巴说得没错 |
[15:36] | We have no choice! We’re running out of time, goddammit! | 我们别无选择 没时间了 妈的 |
[15:38] | – We have to blow Yumyulack up. – No! | -我们得炸了雅姆莱克 -不 |
[15:40] | But, General Mills, it will destroy Manhattan | 但是 米尔斯上将 这将摧毁曼哈顿 |
[15:42] | and kill thousands of innocent people! | 伤亡许多无辜群众 |
[15:43] | General Hospital, it’s a loss I am willing to take. | 霍斯皮特上将 我愿意承担这份损失 |
[15:46] | Plus, the improv scene’s dead here anyway. | 再说了 这剧里都没有即兴发挥 |
[15:48] | Alright, it’s DEFDICK ONE. | 好吧 现在是一级战屌状态 |
[15:50] | It’s time to ready the bombers! | 是时候准备炸弹了 |
[15:54] | There’s only one person that can help. | 只有一个人能帮上忙 |
[15:55] | I just hope I can get to them on time | 我只望能够及时找到他们 |
[15:57] | without giving away who it is. | 并且不说漏嘴 |
[16:08] | Sigourney Weaver? Is that you? | 西格妮·韦弗 是你吗 |
[16:11] | It is I, Susan Alexander Weaver. | 正是在下 苏珊·亚历山德拉·韦弗 |
[16:14] | Wait, that’s your real name? | 等等 那是你的真名 |
[16:15] | – Yes, but I go by Sigourney. – Good call. | -没错 但是我艺名西格妮 -好主意 |
[16:18] | Sigourney, I went too far. | 西格妮 我做过头了 |
[16:20] | I flew too close to the big dick sun | 我飞得太靠近大屌之日了 |
[16:22] | and now everyone is gonna die. | 现在所有人都要死了 |
[16:24] | Hush, my child. | 嘘 孩子 |
[16:25] | No one is dying today. | 没有人会死 |
[16:26] | Because I have the one and only thing, | 因为我有一样东西 |
[16:29] | since the beginning of time, | 从古至今 |
[16:30] | that can stop BDE. | 只有它能阻止大屌力 |
[16:32] | You see, I am made of pure NFG. | 我是娘妈乎之力的化身 |
[16:35] | No Fucks Given. | 老娘他妈不在乎 |
[16:37] | Yes, that’s right, my sweet, sweet boy, | 是的 没错 我的甜心 |
[16:40] | I don’t give a fuck. | 老娘他妈不在乎 |
[16:42] | That’s so cool. | 太酷了 |
[16:43] | I was thinking of getting the Arby’s logo tattooed on my back. | 我正想在背上文个烤牛肉餐厅的商标 |
[16:45] | No. Now just sit back and relax. | 别想了 现在放松 |
[17:04] | That was amazing. | 太棒了 |
[17:06] | You saved the world. | 你拯救了世界 |
[17:07] | Yumyulack, you don’t need BDE | 雅姆莱克 你不需要BDE |
[17:10] | to become the person you want to be. | 才能成为你想成为的人 |
[17:12] | You just have to believe in yourself | 只要相信自己 |
[17:14] | and, say it with me now– | 跟我一起说… |
[17:16] | – Not give a fuck. – Sell weed to the cool kids. | -我他妈不在乎 -卖大麻给酷小孩 |
[17:18] | Right, sorry, not give a fuck. | 抱歉 我他妈不在乎 |
[17:27] | I’m so glad your penises aren’t blowing up anymore. | 太好了 你的鸡鸡不会再爆炸了 |
[17:29] | I got to meet Sigourney Weaver. | 我见到了西格妮·韦弗 |
[17:31] | I know, I called her. And she came! | 我知道 是我叫的她 她真的来了 |
[17:33] | But how did you– | 但你是怎么… |
[17:34] | I’m a junior member! | 我是个初级成员 |
[17:36] | I can’t vote at meetings, but I do get a hoodie. | 我没资格投票表决 但我能领一件连帽衫 |
[17:38] | But I-I don’t understand, you were under my BDE spell. | 我不懂 你都被我的大屌迷住了 |
[17:41] | I was just watching and waiting for the right time. | 我只是在旁观 等待良机 |
[17:44] | Wh-why did you wait | 那那你为什么要 |
[17:44] | until after my dicks blew up and destroyed the city? | 等到我的屌炸毁城市了才行动 |
[17:47] | I told you I’m a junior member! | 说了我只是个初级成员 |
[17:49] | I don’t know all the stuff yet! | 我还不太懂各种事情 |
[18:01] | Terry, this is all my fault. | 特里 这都是我的错 |
[18:03] | I wrote those letters | 是我写了那些信 |
[18:04] | to make you into something that you weren’t. | 把你变成了现在这样 |
[18:05] | It turned you into a murderous psychopath. That was wrong. | 把你变成了一个杀人变态 我错了 |
[18:08] | If you let me send this last letter, it will undo everything. | 让我再寄最后一封吧 它会重置一切 |
[18:11] | I promise. | 我保证 |
[18:12] | – You promise? – Yes, Terry! I promise. | -你保证 -是的 特里 我保证 |
[18:15] | Too late. | 太迟了 |
[18:18] | Read it, Terry. | 读一下信吧 特里 |
[18:20] | Don’t be a little bitch. | 别跟个小婊砸一样 |
[18:22] | I will never read it. | 我永远不会读它 |
[18:24] | This is who I am now. And nothing will change me! | 这就是现在的我 没有什么能让我改变 |
[19:40] | 我帮你拼补好了 小雅 | |
[19:43] | Dearest Terry, just be yourself. | 亲爱的特里 做自己就好 |
[19:45] | That will always be good enough for me. | 对我来说 那就足够了 |
[19:47] | Also, blood can’t turn into shlorbats. | 还有 血不可能变成什洛普蝙蝠 |
[19:49] | I can’t believe you bought that, it’s so dumb. | 你竟然会听信那个 太蠢了 |
[19:51] | You’re the dumbest idiot ever, ha ha ha. | 你是最蠢的蠢蛋 没有之一 哈哈哈 |
[19:53] | Your friend, Korvo. | 你的朋友 科尔沃 |
[20:11] | Dear Korvo, if you are ever being chased | 亲爱的科尔沃 如果哪天 |
[20:13] | by a super-handsome murderous psychopath, | 你被一个超帅的精神病追杀 |
[20:15] | turn left! | 左转 |
[20:24] | Turn left! I have to turn left! | 左转 我得左转 |
[20:37] | Hey, hey! Korvotron, you okay? | 科尔沃 你还好吗 |
[20:39] | I’m chopping up some tomatoes to make my special salsa. | 我在切番茄碎做我的独门萨尔萨辣酱 |
[20:41] | Dude, I hope you aren’t getting sick, | 老兄 希望你不是病了 |
[20:42] | ’cause I am really not feeling like | 因为我今天 |
[20:44] | doing any work on the ship today. | 真不想修船 |
[20:45] | Come on, you wanna watch all the Fast and Furious movies with me, | 来吧 你想跟我一起看《速度与激情》全集 |
[20:47] | including Fast and the Furious Presents: Hobbs and Shaw? | 包括外传《速度与激情:特别行动》吗 |
[20:50] | Yes, Terry, | 好呀 特里 |
[20:51] | that would be… tight. | 那会 很酷 |