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办公室(美版)(The Office(US))第6季第4集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计

Posted on 2024年7月12日 By jubentaici_movie_user 办公室(美版)(The Office(US))第6季第4集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计无评论
目录
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时间 英文 中文
[00:01] I’m sorry, you guys have probably noticed 你们也许注意到了
[00:02] my stomach’s a little more sensitive lately. 我的胃最近比较敏感
[00:05] So, if you wouldn’t mind wearing a little less perfume. 所以,如果你们不介意的话 少喷点香水可以吗?
[00:08] And if your lunch is especially pungent, 如果你们的午餐的味道很大
[00:10] maybe have it in the break room. 也许可以在休息室里吃
[00:12] We would really appreciate it. 我们会很感激的 Pam因为怀孕经常吐 如果她吃了什么胎儿讨厌的 她就吐 真是叹为观止
[00:14] Pam is constantly throwing up because of the pregnancy. 潘因为怀孕经常吐
[00:17] If she eats something the fetus doesn’t like, she is screwed. 如果她吃了什么胎儿讨厌的 她就吐
[00:21] It’s amazing, a three-ounce fetus is calling the shots. 真是叹为观止 三盎司重的胎儿,就可以予取予求 三盎司重的胎儿 就可以予取予求 坏透了! Phyllis 你是否可以换一种香皂 只要一两个月?
[00:25] It’s so badass. 坏透了
[00:28] Phyllis, if you could switch to a different soap, 菲莉丝,你是否可以换一种香皂
[00:31] just for a month or two. Yours is kind of perfumey. 只要一两个月就好 你现在用的太香了 你现在用的太香了 你别逗我了好不 噢 天啊 我很抱歉
[00:34] Now this is getting ridiculous. 你别逗我了好不
[00:36] Oh, gee. I’m sorry. I guess I missed the meeting 噢,天啊,我很抱歉 我是否错过了会议 我是否错过了会议
[00:39] where we all voted for you to get pregnant. 是我们投票叫你怀孕的 是我们投票叫你怀孕的 不行!
[00:42] No. I reserve the right to peel my hard-boiled eggs at my desk. 不行,我保持享有 在我办公桌吃煮鸡蛋的权利 我保持享有 在我办公桌吃煮鸡蛋的权利 我工作一上午 就等着下午抽雪茄 我不会为任何人而放弃雪茄! 我没觉得我要求太过分 依我看 工作场合的礼节就此打住了! 看别人吐 我就会吐 而且… 说实话 现在又说起来了… 办公室 喜欢吗? 花了我一上午时间
[00:47] All morning I look forward to my afternoon cigars. 我工作一上午 就等着下午抽雪茄
[00:50] And I am not stopping for anybody. 我不会为任何人而放弃雪茄
[00:52] I don’t think I’m asking for too much. 我没觉得我要求太过分
[00:54] I guess it’s just the end of courtesy in the workplace. 依我看 工作场合的礼节就此打住了
[01:17] Watching people get sick always makes me sick. 看别人吐,我就会吐
[01:20] And, frankly, so does talking about it. So, wow. 而且,说实话,现在又说起来了… (斯克兰顿欢迎您) (米福林) (前台) 办公室
[02:10] Well, what do you think? 喜欢吗? 花了我一上午时间
[02:11] I spent all morning doing it. 非常别致 你真的要在我们婚礼上… 不 非常棒 这是我很重要的一天 – 那恭喜你 – 谢谢 Dunder Mifflin Scranton 分部 将在今天和星期五歇业 整个公司要去 尼亚加拉瀑布参加婚礼 请留言 我们会尽快回复您 祝您愉快 信不信由你 Kevin 焰火表演在”不允许”这一栏 那么你要亲自提供? 不 这场婚礼没有焰火 – 搞什么? – 你们开玩笑吧
[02:12] It is really special. 非常别致
[02:15] Yeah, but aren’t you supposed to do that to our… No. It’s great. 你真的要在我们婚礼上… 不,非常棒
[02:19] Well, it’s just a really important day for me. 这是我很重要的一天
[02:22] Well, congrats. Thanks. –那恭喜你 –谢谢
[02:24] Dunder Mifflin Scranton will be closed today and Friday 信不信由你,凯文 焰火表演在“不允许”这一栏
[02:28] for a company wedding in Niagara Falls. 那么你要亲自提供? 不,这场婚礼没有焰火
[02:31] So please leave a message and we’ll get back to you as soon as possible. –搞什么?
[02:34] Have a great day. –你们开玩笑吧 这些事情必须记住
[02:36] Believe it or not, Kevin, firecrackers are in the “Don’t” column. 但最重要的事 是不许在我婚礼上谈怀孕
[02:40] So, you’re going to provide them, then? 是的,因为不是所有人都知道
[02:42] No, this is a firecracker-free wedding. 也许一些人会感到被冒犯
[02:43] What the hell? You’ve got to be kidding me. 不管在哪里 体面的人都感到被冒犯了
[02:45] Okay, all of these things are important to remember, 我是说我的奶奶 我们还没告诉她 好的 这些事情必须记住 但最重要的事
[02:47] but the most important thing 她比较老套
[02:49] is that no one say anything 你很幸运,有个奶奶 是不许在我婚礼上谈怀孕
[02:50] about my pregnancy at the wedding. 是的 因为不是所有人都知道 也许一些人会感到被冒犯
[02:52] Absolutely. Because not everyone knows 我们只有自己做奶奶了
[02:54] and some people might be offended. 安吉拉,你没必要来我们的婚礼 不管在哪里 体面的人都感到被冒犯了
[02:55] Decent people everywhere will get offended. 我是说我的奶奶 我们还没告诉她 她比较老套
[02:57] Well, we’re thinking of my grandmother, who we haven’t told –真的吗,潘? –她必须来 我们都要去 而且要玩的开心
[03:00] and who is very old-fashioned. 你很幸运 有个奶奶 我们只有自己做奶奶了 Angele 你没必要来我们的婚礼 – 真的吗 Pam? – 她必须来
[03:01] Well, you’re lucky to have a grandmother. –他捏我 –没有
[03:03] Some of us have to be our own grandmother. 下次我们再来这个房间 杰姆和我就已经结婚了
[03:05] You know, Angela, you don’t have to come to the wedding. –走着瞧吧 –谢谢,德怀特 –再见 –回见
[03:09] Really, Pam? Yes, she does. Yes, she does. –拜拜 –拜拜 我们都要去
[03:10] We’re all going to go and we’re going to have a good time. 而且要玩的开心 去了尼亚拉加 你们可别丢我的人
[03:12] Ow! He pinched me. No. 他捏我 下次我们再来这个房间 Jim和我就已经结婚了 – 走着瞧吧 – 谢谢 Dwight
[03:14] Next time we’re all in this room, Jim and I will be married. 发生在尼亚拉加的事
[03:17] We’ll see. 会留在尼亚拉加
[03:18] Thank you, Dwight. – 再见 – 回见
[03:19] Goodbye. See you later. 别别别,你剽窃了我的笑话 别剽窃别人作品 – 拜拜 – 拜拜 –我没剽窃你的作品 –我昨天说过了 但可以灵活运用的 会计部发生的事 会留在会计部 对!
[03:20] Bye. Bye. 去了尼亚拉加 你们可别丢我的人 发生在尼亚拉加的事
[03:22] Hey, and don’t embarrass me when we go to Niagara. 会留在尼亚拉加(一般只说赌城如此) 别别别 你剽窃了我的笑话 别剽窃别人作品
[03:26] What happens in Niagara stays in Niagara. – 我没剽窃你的作品 – 我昨天说过了
[03:31] Don’t, don’t, don’t. You stole my joke. Don’t steal my joke. 不不不,拜托 德怀特,那是我的笑话
[03:34] No, I didn’t steal your joke. 但这笑话很简单 我就是这意思…
[03:36] Yes, I said that yesterday. 好了,我说的很明白 但可以灵活运用的
[03:37] But you can say that about anything. 当我们离开这里 去了尼亚拉加大瀑布
[03:39] What happens in Accounting stays in Accounting. 会计部发生的事 会留在会计部
[03:41] Oh, yeah! 我们就代表着米福林公司 不不不 拜托 Dwight 那是我的笑话 这是我们分部很重要的婚礼 我知道 但这笑话很简单 我就是这意思 – 可以随便说 – 好了 我说的很明白 当我们离开这里 去了尼亚拉加大瀑布 我们就代表着 Dunder Mifflin公司 这是我们分部很重要的婚礼 是我结婚前 最重要的一场婚礼 所以我要你们全部好好表现 上帝保佑我吧 那我们尼亚’伟’加大瀑布见吧 Pam and Jim的婚礼将是历史上 最重要的婚礼 我从Jim的桌上偷来宾客簿 我搜索了结婚双方的女性资料 – 不是吧 我的天啊 Dwight – 是的
[03:42] No, no, no, no. Please, please. Dwight, that’s my joke.
[03:45] Yeah, but it’s so easy. That’s what I’m saying. You can say…
[03:47] No, okay. This is what I am talking about. 是我结婚前 最重要的一场婚礼
[03:49] When we leave here and go up to Niagara Falls, 所以我要你们全部好好表现 上帝保佑我吧!
[03:53] we are representing Dunder Mifflin, everyone. 那我们尼亚‘伟’加大瀑布见吧
[03:56] This is a very important wedding for this branch.
[03:59] The most important wedding until I get married.
[04:00] So I want you all on your best behavior, 潘和杰姆的婚礼将是历史上
[04:02] or so help me God… 最重要的婚礼 我从杰姆的桌上偷来宾客簿
[04:06] So I will see you up there in Viagra Falls. 我搜索了结婚双方的女性资料 –滚出去
[04:12] Pam and Jim’s wedding will be the single best pickup destination –嗯 我的天啊,德怀特
[04:16] in the history of the universe. 比如潘的表姐
[04:19] I stole the guest list from Jim’s desk, 乔斯琳韦伯斯特
[04:21] and I search-engined every female on both sides of the family. 居然有名字啊
[04:25] Get out of here. Yes. 两年前,她在卖山地车
[04:27] Oh, my God, Dwight. –给我讲讲乔斯琳 –好
[04:28] For instance, Pam’s cousin, Jocelyn Webster. –她什么样子? –好的 比如Pam’s 表姐Jocelyn Webster 她对工作特别的投入 但最近没那么投入了 好吧
[04:33] There’s a name. 居然有名字啊 两年前 她在卖山地车 给我讲讲Jocelyn 她什么样子?
[04:35] Two years ago, she was selling a mountain bike. 她存了几百块钱
[04:38] Oh! Well, tell me about Jocelyn. 如果她可以卖掉山地车的话… 只有这么点资料?
[04:40] Yes. 如果这是她的话 因为这名字很普遍
[04:41] What’s she like? I will, I will. 她对工作特别的投入
[04:42] Well, she’s really into mountain biking. But not so much lately. 好的
[04:46] Okay. 她存了几百块钱
[04:47] She had a couple hundred dollars to spend. 你个白痴 她存了几百块钱 即将参加婚礼 人们觉得我在办公室 穿衣不算特别讲究 但我打算在婚礼上 改变大家的看法 我考虑 “我如何才能鸟枪换炮?” 头发,是头发 好!我马上就走 你们谁坐到前面 如果她可以卖掉山地车的话… 只有这么点资料?
[04:50] I mean, if she was able to sell her bike.
[04:55] Is that all you have on her? 如果这是她的话
[04:56] Well, if this is in fact her, because it’s a very common name. 因为这名字很普遍
[04:59] Okay, you’re an idiot. 你个白痴 人们觉得我在办公室 穿衣不算特别讲究 但我打算在婚礼上 改变大家的看法 我考虑 “我如何才能鸟枪换炮?” 头发 是头发 我马上走了 天啊 你们谁坐到前面 有人陪我说说话 差不多要开5个小时呢 不用啦 这样酷多了 感觉像是坐豪华车 你就是咱司机 – 不啦
[05:09] People don’t think of me as one of the sharper dressers in the office,
[05:14] but I’m going to turn that around at this wedding.
[05:17] I thought, “How can I take it to the next level?”
[05:22] The hair. 有人陪我说说话?
[05:25] It’s the hair. 差不多要开五个小时呢
[05:27] Okay, okay! I’m going. 不用啦,这样酷多了
[05:31] God! 感觉像是坐豪华车,你就是咱司机
[05:35] Hey, do one of you guys want to sit up front with me 艾琳?
[05:37] so I have someone to talk to? 不啦,让凯莉一个人 坐在后排不公平
[05:38] It’s like a five-hour drive-ish, you know. 艾琳不仅人好又可爱
[05:41] Nah, this is so much cooler. We feel like we’re in a limo and you’re our driver. 她闻着像我的妈妈
[05:45] Hmm. –我阿姨跟我说过一件好玩的事情 –嗯?
[05:47] Erin? 让Kelly一个人坐在后排不公平
[05:48] Oh, no. That wouldn’t be fair to leave Kelly alone in the back. 她说婚礼会很快过去的 让Kelly一个人坐在后排不公平 我们要在最开心的时候 用心去拍下记忆照片 Erin不仅人好又可爱 她闻着像我的妈妈 – 我阿姨跟我说过一件好玩的事情 – 嗯? 她说婚礼会很快过去的 我们要在最开心的时候 用心去拍下记忆照片 真是个好主意
[05:53] Not only is Erin really sweet and cute, she smells like my mom. –真是个好主意 –是啊
[05:59] Hey, my aunt told me something neat. Yeah? 咔嚓 你眨眼了 糟糕,现在全印在我脑袋里面啦
[06:01] She said everything with the wedding goes by so fast, 好烂的照片哦!
[06:04] we should try to take mental pictures of the high points. 该请个专业人士来拍的
[06:07] Oh. Wow. That’s cool. 是啊 咔嚓!
[06:08] Yeah. 嗯 你眨眼了
[06:10] Click. 糟糕 现在全印在我脑袋里面啦
[06:12] You blinked. Damn it, now that’s in my brain forever. 天啊
[06:15] Oh! 好烂的照片哦
[06:16] Lousy picture! –我刚睡着了 –什么?不是吧 好烂的照片哦 该请个专业人士来拍的 天啊
[06:17] We should have hired a professional to take the mental pictures. 镜片颜色太深了 好吧,我们该来点音乐才是
[06:26] Oh, God, wow. –我给你录了盘CD –真的吗?好贴心 带女人开房的时候,适合放这个
[06:29] Oh! I was asleep. – 我刚睡着了 – 什么?
[06:31] What? No way. 很周到,来点暧昧气氛哈
[06:32] Those glasses are super dark. 真的 镜片颜色太深了
[06:33] Oh. Wow. –真好,放吧 –你会喜欢的 哦 好吧
[06:34] Okay. All right, we need some tunes, I think. 你好,我是德怀特舒特 如果你听到这盘CD 我们该来点音乐才是 我给你录了盘CD
[06:38] You know what, I made you a CD. 真的吗? 好贴心 带女人开房的时候 适合放这个
[06:39] You did? That was nice of you. Mmm-hmm. 很周到 来点暧昧气氛哈 真好 放吧 你会喜欢的
[06:41] This is to play when you bring a woman back to your hotel room. 你就是被迈克尔吸引的幸运女子
[06:44] Oh! Very thoughtful. A little mix to set the mood. 你真幸运!
[06:47] Delightful. Pop that in. 也许你会想“接下来是什么呢?”
[06:49] You’re going to like this. 别害怕你的“天堂一夜” 你好 我是Dwight Schrute 开什么玩笑? 你让我跟女人开房的时候 放这个给她听? 如果你听到这盘CD 你就是被Michael吸引的幸运女子 下首歌’In your shoes’ 也许你会想 后来还有什么呢? 别害怕你的’天堂一夜’ 开什么玩笑?
[06:50] Hello. My name is Dwight Schrute.
[06:53] If you are listening to this,
[06:55] you are a lucky woman Michael has seduced. –是啊,很实用的 –上帝啊
[06:57] Ah! To be in your shoes! –不,不 –这… 怎么可能有效
[07:00] “What’s next?” You’re probably wondering. 尼亚加拉大瀑布曾经是人们
[07:02] Don’t be scared of your night in heaven. 追寻精神享受的地方 大家呆在帐篷里,任思绪飘扬
[07:05] Are you serious? 你让我跟女人开房的时候 放这个给她听? 是啊 很实用的
[07:06] You want me to play that for a woman coming to my room? 但现在它越来越俗套了 当然也有很多乐趣
[07:09] Yeah. It’s practical. My God. 上帝啊 不 不
[07:11] No, no. It’s… –哈尔佩特夫妇 –还有比斯利 怎么可能有效 今晚我们分房睡 尼亚加拉大瀑布曾经是人们 追寻精神享受的地方 大家呆在帐篷里 任思绪飘扬 但现在它越来越俗套了 当然也有很多乐趣 – Halpert夫妇 – Halpert夫妇
[07:12] That’s not how it works.
[07:14] Niagara Falls used to be, like, a spiritual experience to people. 明晚是蜜月套间
[07:18] They stayed in tents and it blew their minds. –太好了
[07:21] But it’s really kitschy now, which is a lot of fun. –可不是嘛,我们也很兴奋 –我们能现在看一眼蜜月套房吗?
[07:25] Halpert. Halpert. –不好意思,刚才有人入住了 周末这里还有其他婚礼么?
[07:27] And Beesly. 不是,是一位先生登记的,就在那边 还有Beesly 今晚我们分房睡
[07:28] Tonight we’re in two separate rooms 明晚是蜜月套间
[07:29] and then tomorrow night is the honeymoon suite. 嘿嘿,今晚我先住啦 明晚是蜜月套间 – 太好了
[07:31] Great. – 可不是嘛 我们也很兴奋 我们能现在看一眼蜜月套房吗?
[07:32] I know, we’re pretty excited, too. 我要把床弄塌
[07:34] Can we take a look at the suite now? 不好意思 刚才有人入住了 周末这里还有其他婚礼么? 不是 是一位先生登记的
[07:36] I’m sorry. Somebody just checked in. 就在那边 嘿嘿 今晚我先住啦 我要把床弄塌 我有不祥预感
[07:38] Is there another wedding at the hotel this weekend? 我有不祥预感 请给我
[07:40] Oh, no. Just an individual. That man there. 负责换床单的服务员的名字和手机号
[07:43] Hey, I got the room the night before you guys. –你好,迈克尔斯科特订的房间 –请稍等,帮您查一下
[07:46] I’ll break in the bed. 这儿很靠近大瀑布了 所以哪里闻起来都像地下室
[07:51] I don’t like that. 对不起先生 没有看到您的名字 请给我负责换床单的服务员的 您什么时候订的房间? 我没有预定过
[07:52] I’m going to need the name and cell phone number 名字和手机号
[07:54] of the housekeeper responsible for changing the sheets, please.
[07:57] Hello, reservation for Michael Scott. 但我想要比斯利哈尔佩特 他们那一块的房间 你好 Michael Scott订的房间 请稍等 帮您查一下
[08:00] One moment while I check. 好的,对不起,先生 那些房间是要看价格而定的
[08:02] Their proximity to the falls makes everything smell like a basement. 这儿很靠近大瀑布了 所以哪里闻起来都像地下室
[08:05] Mmm-hmm. 我们都已经满房了 对不起先生 没有看到您的名字 您什么时候订的房间?
[08:06] I’m sorry, sir. I’m not seeing you in here. 德怀特舒特,我有预订
[08:08] When did you make your reservation? 确认号,RTG7745
[08:10] I don’t have a reservation, 我没有预定过 但我想要Beesly-Halpert
[08:11] but I want a room in the Beesly-Halpert block of rooms. 他们那一块的房间 好的
[08:14] Oh! Okay. Unfortunately, sir, the block only applies to the rate. 正确,舒特 对不起先生 那些房间是要看价格而定的 特蕾莎说房间里面
[08:18] I’m afraid we’re all sold out. 会有两个保险箱 我们都已经满房了 我有预订 确认号romeo,tango,g,7-7-4-5 正确Schrute
[08:20] Dwight Schrute. I have a reservation. –对,没问题 –好的 –这是您的钥匙 –很好
[08:23] Confirmation number, Romeo-Tango-G-seven- seven-four-five. –谢谢 –德怀特 –我要跟你合住 –不行,要是我遇到喜欢的人怎么办? –拜托,让我住吧… –不
[08:29] Yes. Schrute. 换作我是你,也会这样做的 Theresa说房间里面会有两个保险箱 对 没问题
[08:30] And I had spoken to Teresa about a room with two safes. 换作我是你,也会这样做的 –你会吗? –会的 –真的吗? –真的
[08:34] Sure, no problem. – Okay. 等等,不会吧,不会吧 肯定搞错了吧 – 这是您的钥匙
[08:36] There’s your key, Mr. Schrute. Well, good. Schrute先生 – 很好 谢谢
[08:37] Thank you. 这预定是用的M斯科特的名字
[08:38] Dwight. Dwight, Dwight, Dwight. 这预定是用的M斯科特的名字
[08:40] I need to stay in your room. –那应该是你的了 –谢天谢地 – 我要跟你合住 – 那怎么行? 要是我遇到喜欢的人怎么办?
[08:41] No way. What if I meet someone? – 拜托 让我住吧 – 不 Michael
[08:42] I’m staying in your… Come on, Dwight. 不,既然现在我没房了 我可以和你一间么? – 拜托 让我住吧 – 不 Michael
[08:43] No. Michael. I would do the same for you. – Dwight 换作我是你 也会这样做的 – 你会吗? – 会的
[08:44] You would? Yes. – 真的吗? – 真的 等等 啊 不会吧 不会吧 肯定搞错了吧 这预定是用的M.Scott的名字 哦 那应该是你的了
[08:45] Really? Yes. Let’s just go.
[08:47] Wait a second. No, no, no. This must be some kind of mistake. 不行,你知道不? 我想同意,但对你不能
[08:51] This reservation is under an M. Scott. 我告诉你为啥 –你说 –如果我有女生进房
[08:53] Oh! This must be yours. – 谢天谢地 – 哦 不
[08:55] Thank God. 情意绵绵时
[08:56] Oh, no. Now that I don’t have a room, can I stay with you? 当她看到你在浴室 既然现在我没房了 我可以和你一间么? 不行 你知道不?
[08:59] Um… 用黄油泥刷牙 她肯定“性致”全无
[09:02] No. You know what, I would say yes, but you can’t. 好的,这是个测试,你没通过 – 我想同意 但对你不能 我告诉你为啥 – 你说
[09:05] And I’ll tell you why. 因为这是我的房间,好吗? 如果我有女生进房 情意绵绵时
[09:06] Please. –甭想和我同房 –我没房? 如果我有女生进房 情意绵绵时
[09:07] If I have a woman up there –甭想和我同房 –我没房?
[09:09] and things are getting amorous, 当她看到你在浴室 用黄油泥刷牙 她肯定”性致”全无
[09:10] she’s going to get turned off if she looks in the bathroom –不,你没 –好的
[09:13] and she sees you brushing your teeth with butter and clay, okay? “你准通过了超酷智力测试” –混蛋 –很有效啊
[09:16] Okay, okay. Ah, ha-ha! That was a test and you have failed 圣母玛利亚投店遭拒后,耶稣诞生 哇咔咔 这是个测试 你没通过 因为这是我的房间
[09:19] for this is my room, okay? 懂不? 甭想和我同房
[09:21] You would not share with me. I don’t have a room? 迈克尔投店遭拒 – 我没房? – 不 你没
[09:23] No, you do not. Okay. 喔 你准通过了”超酷”智力测试 很有效啊
[09:25] Ooh! You must pass the dungeon wisdom test. 不知道咋回事了,因为故事还没下文呢
[09:28] Jerk. It worked. 圣母玛利亚投店遭拒后 耶稣诞生 Michael投店遭拒 不知道咋回事了 因为故事还没下文呢 Stanley Hudson夫妇 嘿 Stanley 帮个忙 我今晚能待你房么? 你疯了不成? 我带了Cynthia一起 又不睡一张床 另一张啦 我只有一张大号床 开嘛玩笑 大号床五尺宽呢 我没五尺宽 Michael
[09:29] When Mary was denied a room at the inn, Jesus was born. 斯坦利哈德森夫妇
[09:35] When Michael was denied a room at the inn, 嘿,斯坦利,帮个忙 我今晚能待在你的房间么?
[09:38] we don’t know what happens because that story hasn’t been told yet. 你疯了不成?我带了辛西娅一起 又不睡一张床,另一张啦
[09:44] Mr. And Mrs. Stanley Hudson. –我只有一张大号床 –开嘛玩笑
[09:46] Hey, Stanley, favor. Could I stay in your room tonight? 大号床五尺宽呢 我没五尺宽,迈克尔
[09:50] Are you out of your mind? I brought Cynthia with me. 咱不懂医,斯坦利 咱就建议你要小心
[09:53] Not in the same bed. In the other bed. 嘿,各位 今晚我能待在你的房间么?
[09:55] I got one queen-sized bed. –哦,恶心 –想雷死我啊
[09:57] You are kidding me. 真无礼
[09:59] A queen-sized bed is five feet wide. 迈克尔,我房间多一张单人床 如果你要的话
[10:02] I am not five feet wide, Michael. 你下半辈子都单独睡吧你 咱不懂医 Stanley 咱就建议你要小心 现在赶紧适应适应 哪位是潘的奶奶哦? 奶奶?蓝绿色套装的就是她 她是唯一80几岁还没笑纹的 爸,记得,别提孩子,知道不? –不 –是哇,是哇,她很保守的 千万别提那词 –爸,这位是迈克尔斯科特 –幸会 –嗨 –幸会 –幸会 –谁说祝酒词呢? 我想第三个说,作为收场祝词… 嘿 筒子们 嘿
[10:03] I’m not a physics major, Stanley. I’m just saying, be careful.
[10:06] Hey, guys. Hey, could I stay in your room tonight? 今晚我能待你房么? – 哦 恶心 – 想雷死我啊
[10:09] Oh, gross. Blow my brains out. 真无礼
[10:11] That’s rude. Michael 我房间多一张单人床
[10:13] Michael, I have an extra twin bed if you want. 如果你要的话 你下半辈子都单独睡吧你
[10:16] You are going to be sleeping by yourself for the rest of your life, 现在赶紧适应适应 哪位是Pam的奶奶哦?
[10:19] so you should just get used to it. 哦 奶奶?
[10:22] So, which one is Pam’s grandma? 蓝绿色套装的就是她 她是唯一80几岁还没笑纹的
[10:26] Oh, Meemaw? She’s the one in the teal suit. 爸 记得
[10:29] She’s the only 80-year-old with no smile wrinkles. 别提孩子 知道不?
[10:31] Dad, remember, no mention of the baby, right? 迈克尔,咱不是说好不用你说么
[10:34] No. 是哇 是哇 她很保守的
[10:35] Yeah, yeah, yeah, she’s very conservative. 啥都甭说,因为说的都是亲戚 千万别提那词
[10:37] So, mum’s the word. 爸 这位是Michael Scott
[10:39] Mom, Dad, this is Michael Scott. How you doing? 这明显妨碍我 – 幸会 – 幸会
[10:41] Hi. Nice to meet you. 和你家女性亲戚勾搭嘛 – 幸会 – 谁说祝酒词呢?
[10:42] Nice to meet you. Who’s doing a toast? 和你家女性亲戚勾搭嘛 我想第三个说 作为收场祝词 Michael 咱不是说好不用你说么
[10:44] I would like to go third, sort of bat cleanup if… –大家都听到了
[10:46] Michael, I thought we discussed –我嘴唇都没动
[10:48] that we’d rather you not speak, like, at all. (比斯利–哈尔佩特 婚礼彩排晚宴) 啥都甭说 因为说的都是亲戚 这明显妨碍我 和你家女性亲戚勾搭嘛 大家都听到了 我嘴唇都没动诶 嘿 奶奶 自你父母离婚后 你家族都有谁 我就搞不清了 但你和Jim超般配的 – 上帝保佑你们 – 哦 谢谢您 但人无完人哇 如果我真这么想 我也白活了 Beesly先生 你好不?
[10:50] Because it’s just going to be blood relatives, I think. 嘿,奶奶
[10:53] That is seriously going to impede my ability 自你父母离婚后
[10:55] to hook up with your female relatives. Pretty sure everybody heard that. 你家族都有谁,我就搞不清了
[11:00] Didn’t move my lips. 但你和杰姆超般配的
[11:05] Hey, Meemaw. –上帝保佑你们
[11:07] I wasn’t sure about your branch of the family –谢谢您,但人无完人哇
[11:11] after I heard about your parents’ divorce. 如果我真这么想,我也白活了
[11:14] But you and Jim are just perfect. –比斯利先生,你好不? –来见见克里斯蒂凯莉
[11:19] God bless you. 哦,你侄女啊?
[11:21] Thank you, but nobody’s perfect. 不不,她是我女友
[11:24] Well, I wouldn’t care to live if I thought that. 主桌还能加个人么?
[11:31] Mr. Beesly, how are you? 来见见Kristy Kelly 哦 你侄女啊? 不不 她是我女友 嘿 那桌还能加个人么? 而他销售业绩 下降2% 报告里都写着呢 既然你聪明多了 干啥他们还让那坏人当你老板呢?
[11:32] I’d like you to meet Kristy Kelly. 而他销售业绩,下降2%
[11:34] Oh! Is this your niece? 报告里都写着呢 既然你聪明多了
[11:38] No, no. She’s my girlfriend. Hey, can you make room at the head table? 干啥他们还让那坏人当你老板呢?
[11:42] From quarter three to quarter four, up 17%. 问的好,因为当我忙着 改善公司,提高成效时,杰姆
[11:46] While his sales, down 2%. It’s all there in the report. 那个坏人,忙着拍老板马屁呢 没错,就是恶,超恶啊
[11:50] Why would they make the bad man your boss 奥斯卡,凯文,这是我妹潘妮 她还是我伴娘 很荣幸
[11:52] if you’re so much smarter? 问的好
[11:53] Excellent question. Because while I was busy 因为当我忙着改善公司 提高成效时 坏人Jim
[11:56] trying to improve the company and make it a success, Jim… 忙着拍老板马屁呢 (字面义: 亲老板屁股)
[12:00] The bad man was busy kissing the boss man’s butt. 抱歉,你叫凯文哦? 我还以为叫吉尔呢
[12:04] Ew! 她以为我是你男友 没错 就是恶 超恶啊 Oscar Kevin 这是我妹Penny 她还是我伴娘 很荣幸
[12:05] That’s right. It is ew. It’s very ew. 她以为我是你男友 你觉得我跟这种人约会? 你脑子有病啊? –奥斯卡,她无心的 –他?他? –奥斯卡,假如和你约会我三生有幸 –对不起 –我不是同性恋,我叫凯文 –很高兴见到你,凯文 –对 –你欠我一个道歉
[12:09] Oscar, Kevin, this is my sister, Penny. She’s also my maid of honor.
[12:13] Pleased to meet you. 哦
[12:15] I’m sorry, it’s Kevin? I thought it was Gil. 抱歉 你叫Kevin哦?
[12:19] She thought I was your boyfriend. 我还以为叫Gill呢 她以为我是你男友
[12:22] You thought I was dating this? 你觉得我跟这种人约会? 你脑子有病啊?
[12:25] What the hell is wrong with you? –真对不起,我不是… –你是单身吗? Oscar
[12:26] Oscar, it was an honest mistake. 她无心的 她有男朋友了,没来 他? 他?
[12:29] Him? Him? –酷 –谢谢 Oscar 假如和你约会我三生有幸 – 对不起 – 我不是同性恋 我叫Kevin 很高兴见到你 Kevin
[12:31] Oscar, I would be proud to date you. 我是公司历史上最年轻的副总裁
[12:33] I’m sorry. 他前阵子在保龄球馆上班
[12:34] I’m not gay. I’m Kevin.
[12:36] Nice to meet you, Kevin. 说说那边好玩的事情啊
[12:38] Yeah. You owe me an apology. – 欠我一个道歉 – 真对不起 我不是–
[12:40] I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean… 梅瑞狄斯怎么可以坐在年轻人那桌? 你是单身吗?
[12:41] Are you seeing anyone right now? 她有男朋友了 没来
[12:42] She has a boyfriend. He’s out of town. 她大概和别人换桌牌了 – 哦 –
[12:43] Cool. Thank you. 谢谢 我是公司历史上最年轻的副总裁 他前阵子在保龄球馆上班 说说那边好玩的事情啊 还有…
[12:45] I was the youngest VP in company history. 我就跟艾琳换了
[12:48] More recently, he worked in a bowling alley. 什么?你不能…那个…你…
[12:50] Tell her one of your funny bowling alley stories.
[12:53] How did Meredith get put at the young people’s table? 杰姆和潘,我很高兴来这儿 Meredith怎么可以坐在年轻人那桌? 主桌,我该坐那边的 –那边是都是亲属 –那个是谁? 伊莎贝尔波伦巴,我有她的资料 她大概和别人换桌牌了 我就跟Erin换了 什么?
[12:57] She probably switched cards with someone.
[12:59] Like I did with Erin.
[13:02] What? You can’t… That’s… You’re… 你什– 我… Jim Pam 我很高兴来这儿 主桌 我该坐那边的 – 那边是都是亲属 – 我知道
[13:07] Jim and Pam, I can’t tell you how happy I am to be here.
[13:12] Head table, where I belong. 1996年,她十年级时的排球队10胜2负
[13:15] It’s just for family.
[13:17] Well, who’s that one? 知道那有什么用,德怀特? 那个是谁? 强悍的纪录 Isabel Poreba 我有她的资料 1996年 她十年级时的排球队10胜2负 知道那有什么用 Dwight? 强悍的纪录
[13:22] Isabel Poreba. I got stuff on her. 对,我就说“你真好,大好人” –然后我就露出这样的表情… –就像是“什么?”
[13:26] In 1996, her 10th grade volleyball team went ten and two. 对,然后我们再拍一下他们后背 –抓抓头发 –虽然你知道吗? –千万别抓抓头发就结婚哇
[13:31] What am I supposed to do with that, Dwight? –千万别 他们知道很多笑话素材 但表达肯定不对头 我最受不了兄弟搭档了,应该是我
[13:34] That’s a very good record. 对 我就说”你真好
[13:36] All right, so I’ll be like, “He is so sweet, guys, and so kind.” 大好人” 然后我就露出这样的表情–
[13:38] That’s when I’ll do the face like… 对 然后我们再拍一下他们后背
[13:40] Like, “What?” Right. 应该是我和彼得 而不是彼得和汤姆
[13:41] And then we’ll just give him a little punch to the back. – 抓抓头发? –
[13:43] A noogie. Although, you know what? 千万别结婚 千万别 别抓抓头发就结婚哇
[13:44] Never too married for a noogie. 潘,你的笑容最美 –身材没的说 –很辣
[13:45] Never. 他们知道很多笑话素材
[13:47] They have hilarious material and they’re going to totally deliver it wrong. 但表达肯定不对头 我最受不了”兄弟”搭档了
[13:51] I would kill with the brother stuff. It should be me up there. 希望可以让我们的老婆有点危机感咯 应该是我 应该是我和Pete
[13:54] It should be me and Pete, not Pete and Tom. 而不是Pete和Tom 看见你们的心 真是不合时宜 大家好,我保证过不说祝酒词的
[13:59] Pam, you’ve got the greatest smile 我也不准备说 Pam 你的笑容最美
[14:02] and your body is really fine. – 身材没的说 – 很辣
[14:04] Smoking. 就说点单口笑话 希望可以让我们的老婆有点危机感咯
[14:05] Hoping it’ll make our wives kick it up a notch. 说完了,如果大家想举杯 为潘和杰姆庆贺
[14:07] A little more cardio. 看见你们的心(露多点) 真是不合时宜 大家好
[14:10] That’s not appropriate. 那也行 智能车是什么?
[14:14] Hello. Hi, everybody. 我保证过不说祝酒词的 我也不准备说 就说点单口笑话 说完了 如果大家想举杯
[14:15] I promised I wasn’t going to make a toast and I’m not going to. 多智能?那些东西太小了
[14:18] Just going to do a little freestanding comedy, 能在路上开吗?
[14:20] and if at the end “我是智能车”等于质量乘光速的平方 我驾驶的是智能车
[14:21] everybody wants to raise their glasses to Pam and Jim, 为Pam和Jim庆贺 那也行
[14:23] then so be it. 智能车是什么? 多智能?
[14:26] Hey, what is the deal with the Smart car? 在我字典里那可不是智能车 真正的智能车是基特 –《霹雳游侠》里面那个 –《霹雳游侠》 我们能和那车交谈 智能车会说话吗?
[14:30] How smart is that? Those things are tiny. 那些东西太小了 能在路上开吗?
[14:33] Can you even drive them in traffic? “我是智能车”等于质量乘光速的平方 我驾驶的是智能车 在我字典里那可不是智能车
[14:34] “Oh, I’m so smart. E equals MC squared. I drive a Smart car.” –不能,还不够智能 –不 –还有《飞天万能车》里那车哇 –很智能 你们大家想笑就笑 不是非要装没听懂,可以笑
[14:40] That’s not smart in my book. 真正的智能车是Kitt –
[14:41] The real smart car is KITT, 霹雳游侠里面那个 – 霹雳游侠
[14:44] from Knight Rider. Knight Rider. 我们能和那车交谈
[14:45] That’s a car that can talk. Can Smart car talk? –不 –哦,你上吧 智能车会说话吗? 好的,谢谢大家能来 不能 还不够智能 – 还有”飞天万能车”里那车哇 – 很智能
[14:48] Nope. That’s not smart. No. –混小子
[14:50] And also Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. –谢谢彼得,真会说话
[14:52] Very smart. 我想说,我很高兴我们 能邀请你们今晚前来 你们–大家想笑就笑哈 尤其要感谢那些
[14:53] And everybody can laugh. 大老远跑来的人们 不是非要装没听懂 可以笑 –
[14:57] It doesn’t have to just be the idiots. Everybody can laugh. 不 – 哦 你上吧
[15:00] Nope. Yeah, go ahead. 好的 谢谢大家能来 – 混小子 – 谢谢Pete 真会说话
[15:01] All right. Hey, everyone. Thanks for coming. 尤其是住在佛罗里达的表亲们 显然不太会领会暗示
[15:03] Douche! 四年前,我就是一个普通人 对一个有男朋友的女孩动了感情
[15:04] Aw! Thanks, Pete. That was really nice. 我想说
[15:06] I just want to say how happy we are 我很高兴我们 你们今晚能来
[15:08] that all of you are here tonight. 尤其要感谢那些 大老远跑来的人们 尤其是住在佛罗里达的表亲们 显然不太会领会暗示哈 四年前 我就是一个普通人 对一个有男朋友的女孩动了感情 我做了最难的事情 就是等待 别理解错了 我也有和她调情先的 Pam 现在在家人和朋友面前 我承认我知道怎么复印 不用你帮那么多次 还记得你教了我多久 我才学会开手排车么?
[15:10] And I want to especially thank those of you
[15:12] who have traveled from far away to be here with us tonight. 我做了最难的事情
[15:15] Especially the Florida cousins, 就是等待
[15:18] who obviously can’t take a hint. 别理解错了,我和她调情过的
[15:21] Four years ago, I was just a guy 潘,现在在家人和朋友面前
[15:24] who had a crush on a girl who had a boyfriend. 我承认我知道怎么复印
[15:27] And I had to do the hardest thing that I’ve ever had to do, 不用你帮那么多次 还记得你教了我多久
[15:30] which was just to wait. 我才学会开手排车么? 差不多一年吧
[15:34] Don’t get me wrong, I flirted with her. 从高中开始我就开手排车了
[15:36] Pam, I can now admit in front of friends and family 很好,很长一段时间来,就这些了
[15:38] that I do know how to make a photocopy.
[15:41] Didn’t need your help that many times. 我和这个只把我当朋友的女生
[15:43] And do you remember how long it took you 相处时间有限
[15:45] to teach me how to drive stick? 很多人跟我说我疯了 等这么长时间 差不多一年吧
[15:46] Like a year. – 从高中开始我就开手排车了 – 很好 很长一段时间来 就这些了 我和这个只把我当朋友的女生 相处时间有限 很多人跟我说我疯了 等这么长时间为了和个女同事约会 但是即使在那时候… 我知道我在等我的真命天女 所以…
[15:48] I’ve been driving stick since high school. 为了和一个女同事约会
[15:51] So, yes, yes. For a really long time that’s all I had. 但是即使在那时候我知道
[15:55] I just had little moments with a girl who saw me as a friend. 我在等我的真命天女
[15:59] And a lot of people told me I was crazy to wait this long 所以我提议大家干一杯
[16:02] for a date with a girl who I worked with, 所以请大家举杯,潘不用,显而易见么
[16:04] but I think even then I knew that 其他人,请举杯… 什么显而易见?潘为什么不能喝酒? 潘不能喝? 什么,我没,我不该说的
[16:08] I was waiting for my wife. 我也不知道自己说什么呢 她想干什么就干什么 当然了,她不该喝 因为她酗酒
[16:11] So, I would like to propose a toast. 我提议大家干一杯 所以请大家举杯 Pam不用 显而易见么 其他人 请举杯… 什么显而易见? Pam为什么不能喝酒? Pam不能喝?
[16:15] So, if you’d all raise your glasses, not Pam, for obvious reasons.
[16:19] But everyone else, if you would raise your glasses…
[16:20] What’s obvious? Why can’t Pam drink? –潘酗酒 –杰姆 不是那样的,不是 我们想要的…真正原因是 潘怀孕了
[16:24] Pam can’t drink? Who… I didn’t… I shouldn’t have said that. 什么 我没 我不该说的 我也不知道自己说什么呢
[16:27] I don’t know why I did. She can do whatever she wants. 她想干什么就干什么 当然了 她不该喝
[16:30] Though she shouldn’t. She shouldn’t because she’s an alcoholic. 因为她酗酒 Pam酗酒
[16:34] Pam is an alcoholic. 好了,好了
[16:35] Jim. 好了,好了 不是那样的 不是 我们–真正原因是… 是Pam怀孕了 好了 好了 Jim想说的应该是… 那是意外 这两个人 他们住一起 那都是你情我愿的事情 – 他们住一起了? – 是的 他们住一起 是的 知道么?
[16:36] That’s not true. No. 杰姆想说的应该是
[16:40] What we wanted… The real reason 那是意外
[16:46] is that Pam’s pregnant. 这两个人,他们住一起
[16:49] Okay, okay, okay. 那都是你情我愿的事情
[16:51] Hey, what I think Jim is trying to say is that –他们住一起了? –是的,他们住一起,是的
[16:57] they had an accident. 知道么?
[16:58] And you know what? These two people, they’re living together, 你也不能让他们每次都做保护措施 因为,坦白说,感觉的确不同
[17:03] they are having lots of consensual sex. –迈克尔 –当你要…
[17:06] They were living together? 我说错了么? 他们说一样,但感觉的确是不一样
[17:08] Yes, yes, they were living together. Yes. ––你用那啥去阻… –天啊,拜托你 大家都知道我在说什么吧
[17:10] And you know what? You can’t expect them to be careful every time, 你也不能让他们每次都做保护措施 因为 坦白说 感觉的确不同 – 当你要– 我说错了么?
[17:16] because, frankly, it’s just a different sensation. 对女方来说也许没那么不同
[17:18] Michael. When you come… Well? 迈克尔
[17:20] Am I wrong? They say it’s not different, –但是是不一样的…好吧,好吧 –迈克尔,行了你 他们说一样 但感觉的确是不一样…
[17:22] but it’s a different sensation… 好吧 – 天啊 拜托你 – 你用那啥去阻… 大家都知道我在说什么吧 对女方来说也许没那么不同
[17:23] Oh, my God, no, please. 好吧
[17:25] …when you use something to block… 我意思是我说完要说的了
[17:28] I think everybody knows what I am talking about. 奶奶,希望你都听进去了
[17:31] It’s not necessarily different for the woman. –好的 –杰姆
[17:32] Michael. – 但是是不一样的
[17:34] But it is different… Okay, okay, okay. 好吧 好吧 – Michael 行了你 – 好吧 我意思是我说完要说的了 奶奶 希望你都听进去了 好的 为等待干杯
[17:35] Michael, stop. –为等待干杯
[17:37] All right. –为等待干杯 –好的
[17:39] My point is, I said what I wanted to say. –为等待干杯 昨晚酒店的电视上
[17:42] And, Meemaw, I hope you heard every word. 放了一部叫《布鲁诺》的电影 我还想,他们怎么选这么一家酒店?
[17:44] All right. Jim. –现在算明白了 –奶奶
[17:50] To waiting. 致”等待”
[17:51] To waiting. 我早该猜到了
[17:52] – Okay. – To waiting. 昨晚电视放的是个叫<布鲁诺>的电影
[17:57] I should have known. 遥控器上那么多按键 我关都关不了
[18:00] The hotel’s television set had a 我想差点就要一触即发了 但是我相信我拯救了你
[18:05] The remote control had so darn many buttons on it, 不敢相信刚才会是我说的 我也不敢相信是你
[18:07] I couldn’t turn it off. 我就坐那儿倍受煎熬 我还想 他们怎么选这么一家酒店?
[18:09] So, I had to just sit there while it happened to me. 我想这让我压力减轻不少
[18:12] I wondered, “How could they pick such a hotel?” 是不是因为当经理就让你乱说话? –不是那样啊 ––嘿,聪明的小伙们
[18:18] Hmm. Now I know. –真对不起 –你能相信吗? 现在算明白了 他搞砸了,不是我 奶奶 我想差点就要一触即发了 但是我相信我拯救了你
[18:21] Meemaw. 奶奶不参加婚礼了,她明早就走 –天啊,真的吗?
[18:24] I think it was a little touch-and-go at first, –那就是说会有空房喽? 奶奶,我是迈克尔
[18:26] but we saved it, I believe. 不敢相信刚才会是我说的
[18:27] I can’t believe it was me. 我也不敢相信
[18:30] I know. I can’t believe it was you, either. 我想这让我压力减轻不少
[18:33] I actually think it takes a lot of pressure off of me. Is there something about being a manager 是不是因为当经理就让你乱说话?
[18:38] that makes you say stupid things? 你就是那个大谈做爱的下流家伙 不是那样啊
[18:39] I have not found that to be the case. – 嘿 聪明的小伙们 – 真对不起
[18:40] Hey, smooth guys. 你能相信吗? 他搞砸了 不是我
[18:41] I am so sorry. 是啊,如假包换,我能进去吗? 你能相信吗? 他搞砸了 不是我
[18:42] Can you believe it? He screwed up, not me. 奶奶不参加婚礼了
[18:44] Meemaw’s not coming to the wedding. 她明早就走
[18:45] She’s leaving tomorrow morning. 我和老婆婆很合得来的 – 天啊 真的吗? – 那就是说会有空房喽? 奶奶 我是Michael 你就是那个大谈做爱的下流家伙 是啊 如假包换 我能进去吗? 我和老婆婆很合得来的
[18:47] Oh, my God. Are you serious? 事实上很长时间来我最好的朋友是我祖母
[18:48] There’s going to be a free room? 后来她遇见了哈莉特 现在她觉得她比其他人都优秀
[18:58] Hi, Meemaw. It’s Michael. 我可以进来吗?
[19:01] Oh! You’re that foul man that kept talking about intercourse. 事情是这样的
[19:04] Yes. Yep, one and the same. May I? 奶奶,我觉得在潘怀孕这事情上 你该冷静下来
[19:09] I am actually great with old women. 现在不是1890,现在是新世纪了 事实上很长时间来我最好的朋友是我祖母 女人在结婚前做爱 我认为我们该庆祝一下 但是在你那个年代,她就是一荡妇 现在女人们都出去疯啊,做爱啊, 后来她遇见了Harriet 现在她觉得她比其他人都优秀 我想睡觉 但是不能 电视关不掉 哦 这样 帮你一忙 – 谢谢了 – 不客气
[19:10] In fact, for the longest time my best friend was my grandmother.
[19:15] And then she met Harriet,
[19:18] and now she thinks she’s better than everybody.
[19:21] I want to go to bed, but I can’t.
[19:24] I can’t turn that television off. 狂野啊,上衣脱了
[19:26] Oh! Okay, well. Hook you up there. 还拍照
[19:31] Oh! 我们还得鼓励她们,这就是生活
[19:32] Thank you. You’re welcome. –现在人们都像阿猫阿狗了 –是啊 是那个垃圾Charlie Rose(著名记者) 他是挺垃圾 我能坐? 是这样的 奶奶 我觉得在Pam怀孕这事情上 你该冷静下来 现在不是1890 现在是新世纪了 女人在结婚前做爱 我认为我们该庆祝一下
[19:34] It was that horrible Charlie Rose.
[19:36] Oh. Isn’t he terrible? May I? –这曾经是一个伟大的国家 –我知道 我不知道这个国家怎么了
[19:40] Here’s the thing. 他们要用你的名字给宝宝起名 他们会叫她奶奶
[19:44] Meemaw, I think you just need to chill out –你是说西尔维娅
[19:47] about this whole “Pam getting pregnant” thing. –是的
[19:49] It’s not 1890 anymore. It’s modern day. 如果是男孩就叫西尔维奥
[19:52] And women have sex before marriage. –派对,639房间 –是的
[19:55] And I think we need to celebrate that. 派对上有很多漂亮小妞 还有很多帅哥,奥斯卡 但是在你那个年代 她就是一荡妇 现在女人们都出去疯啊 做爱啊 狂野啊
[19:58] And I know, in your day, she would be considered a whore. –我们什么都能带吗? –没什么 除了带40美金
[20:01] But now, women go out and they have sex, 买啤酒 还有应付火辣的姑娘 因为那会让我兑现我许下的一些承诺
[20:05] and they get wild, and they take their tops off. 上衣脱了 还拍照 我们还得鼓励她们 这就是生活 – 现在人们都像阿猫阿狗了 – 是啊
[20:08] And they have pictures taken of them. 办公室里的人
[20:11] And we need to encourage that. That’s part of life. 没人去过真正的伯纳德派对
[20:13] People are like cats and dogs these days. 如果我是女的 我会再三考虑是否参加这个派对
[20:15] Exactly. – 我们祖国从前多好 – 可不是嘛
[20:17] This used to be such a great country. 但别跟他们说是我说的 因为我想他们参加
[20:19] I know. 我不知道怎么了
[20:20] I don’t know what happened to it. 德怀特,快点,我们走 知道吗?
[20:22] They’re going to name the baby after you, you know. 他们要拿你的名字给孩子命名 孩子的名字会是奶奶 (Michael把Meemaw:奶奶当成她的名字了=.=)
[20:24] They’re going to call it Meemaw. –你穿的什么? –快点,这是休闲的社交服装 我叫Sylvia
[20:25] You mean Sylvia. 对
[20:28] Yes. 看起来你要去吃烤鱼,德怀特 如果是男孩就叫 Sylvio – 趴体哈 639房间 – 好耶
[20:29] And if it’s a boy they will call it Silvio. 不,他们对着月亮嚎叫 这是对女性的暗示
[20:33] Party, room 639. 因为她们在性行为中嚎叫 好的
[20:35] Yes. 姑娘会像撒缰的野马哦
[20:36] Chicks are going to be off the hook. Guys, too, Oscar. 那不合适 男的也是 Oscar 就像CK的模特
[20:39] Like Calvin Klein models. 不酷,德怀特
[20:41] That sounds epic. 太爽了 能带什么么?
[20:43] Can we bring anything? 什么也不带
[20:44] Nothing. 好的,快点,我们走 40块的酒钱 认识辣妹就带上 你觉得你要去哪里?
[20:45] Except for $40 for beer and any hot chicks you know. 我就是去酒店的酒吧待一会儿 为什么我不猛踹你的胃 给你省点时间? 我就是想离开我的房间一会儿
[20:49] Because that would help me deliver on some promises I made. 好的,我跟你去,快点 没关系 这样的话我的承诺就兑现了 哇!
[20:52] Whoo! 办公室其他人还没见过我的绝技呢
[20:53] No one from the office has been to a real Bernard throw-down. 我要是女的 我肯定重新考虑下要不要来
[20:58] If I was a girl, I would seriously reconsider coming to this party. 但是别告诉他们
[21:01] But don’t tell them that I said that because I want them there. 因为我想让他们去 你去哪?
[21:12] And where do you think you’re going? 你确定? –会有意思的 –不 我去下面酒吧待会儿 我就是在我的大日子之前休息一下 不然这样 我省你一点时间 在你肚子上踢一脚算了? 我只是想出去转转
[21:13] I was just going to go down to the hotel bar for a little bit.
[21:16] Well, why don’t I just save you some time
[21:17] and kick you in the stomach instead? 我要待在这里 防止你又焦虑不安
[21:20] I just wanted to get out of my room for a little while. –好 –好的
[21:22] Mmm-hmm? 好啊 我跟你去吧
[21:23] Okay, I’ll go with you. Come on. 走啊 算了
[21:26] Never mind. (末完待续) – 确定? 说不定很有意思呢 – 算了 你们也许注意到了 我的胃最近比较敏感 所以 如果你们不介意的话 少喷点香水… 如果你们的午餐的味道很大 也许可以在休息室里吃 我们会很感激的
[21:28] Are you sure? Yeah.
[21:29] Could be fun. No. – 你穿的是什么啊?
[21:31] What are you wearing? – 什么?
[21:32] Come on. It’s a casual, social outfit. 这就是休闲装啊 整的像去吃炸鱼似的 Dwight
[21:35] Looks like you’re going to a fish fry, Dwight. 不是啊 是朝月亮嚎叫
[21:36] No, they’re howling at the moon. 对女生有暗示意义的
[21:38] It’s suggestive to women because of howling during sex. 做爱的时候嚎叫 好了
[21:41] Okay. 不太好 Dwight.
[21:43] That’s not appropriate. 不好 不好 Dwight
[21:46] Uncool. Uncool, Dwight. 好了 走吧 –
[21:51] Okay, okay. Come on, let’s go. 好主意 – 不是好主意
[21:55] Good, it’s good. No, it’s not a good idea. 假发就没有好的
[21:57] There’s no such thing as a good hairpiece. 你当然这么说了
[21:59] Oscar Yeah, but that’s easy enough for you to say, Oscar.
[22:01] You have that thick, beautiful Chicano hair. 你有一头浓密漂亮的墨西哥头发
[22:06] So nice. 真好 我就担心农场
[22:09] I’m just worried about the farm, you know? Mose讨厌独自阉马
[22:11] Mose hates to geld the horses by himself. Dwight 别提你的农场了
[22:13] Dwight, Dwight, shut up about the farm. 根本没关系 这没人开农场
[22:15] It’s not relatable. Nobody owns a farm. 你担心你的马匹?
[22:17] Wait, you’re worried about your horses? That’s cool. 酷
[22:21] How many horses do you have? 你有几匹? 九又四分之三
[22:23] Nine and three-quarters. 我发明一个装置叫汉堡忙不停
[22:25] I invented a device called “burger on the go.” 能装正常大小的6片汉堡 或者12片从马身上割下的肉
[22:28] It allows you to obtain six regular-sized hamburgers or twelve sliders 而不杀死马 George
[22:32] from a horse without killing the animal. Foreman在考虑中 (美国专业厨房用炙烤系例产品品牌)
[22:35] George Foreman is still considering it. Sharpeimage在考虑中 (电器零售商)
[22:37] Sharper lmage is still considering it. Skymall在考虑中 (网络销售零售商)
[22:38] Sky Mall is still considering it. Hammacheschlemmer在考虑中
[22:40] Hammacher Schlemmer is still considering it. (邮购零售商) 西尔斯百货是没戏了
[22:43] Sears said no. 玩具总动员 海底总动员
[22:53] Toy Story, Finding Nemo, Up. 飞屋环游记 我大爱
[22:56] I bawl the entire time. I cannot watch Pixar. – 我不看皮克斯的电影 – 嗯 – 别管她了 闪
[22:59] Michael. Yes? – 为什么? – 我找到一对双胞胎
[23:00] Drop this one, abort. Why? – 为什么? – 我找到一对双胞胎 天啊 双胞胎 对不起 你理解吧 很高兴见到你 很棒吧? 他们是男的 Dwight 我就喜欢寻找双胞胎 有病 耶 Meredith! 不错! 那是机器人舞? 能更像机器人不? 这样 真次 还有啥啊 Andy? 这样怎么样? 还有啥啊? 就是 还有啥啊? 我是不是叫Baskin Robbins(冰淇淋店)? 我咋觉得自己像个香蕉圣代 (split 字面义:劈叉) 还有啥啊?
[23:02] I found twins.
[23:04] Oh, my God. Twins.
[23:07] I’m sorry, you understand. Nice to meet you.
[23:12] Aren’t they magnificent?
[23:17] They’re men, Dwight.
[23:19] I love finding a good set of twins.
[23:21] Something is wrong with you.
[23:27] Yeah, Meredith. That’s cool.
[23:32] You call that a robot? Try being more robotic, okay? Like this.
[23:41] Lame. What else you got, Andy?
[23:43] How about a little bit of this?
[23:47] Oh, yeah? What else you got?
[23:49] Yeah, what else you got?
[23:52] Did someone change my name to Baskin Robbins?
[23:54] Because I feel like a banana split.
[23:58] Whoo!
[24:04] What else you got?
[24:06] Oh! All right. Easy. Easy. 好了 会没事的
[24:08] Easy, easy. 没事的
[24:09] It’s going to be fine, it’s going to be fine. Pam’s here. Pam在这儿
[24:15] Pam? 跳舞练了个劈腿
[24:19] I was dancing and I did a split 结果坐到袋袋里的车钥匙上了
[24:21] and I landed on my car keys in my pocket. 什么?
[24:24] What? 阴囊撕裂啦
[24:25] I tore my scrotum. I need you to take me to the hospital. 带我去医院吧 Andy
[24:30] Andy, I’m getting married in eight hours. 8个小时后我就要结婚了 其他人都喝多了
[24:33] Everyone else is too drunk. Just don’t let me die here. 别让我死在这儿啊 你在哪?
[24:37] Hey, hey, where are you? Can you take Andy to the hospital? 你能带Andy去医院吗? –
[24:40] What? 什么? – 跳舞时阴囊撕裂
[24:41] He tore his scrotum dancing. – 什么?
[24:43] What? – 他在我房里呢 冰敷他蛋蛋
[24:44] He is in my room icing his balls. – 什么? – 别说”什么”了
[24:45] What? Please stop saying “what.” – 你带他去好吗? – 当然可以
[24:48] Can you take him? 其他任何时间都可以 但我现在完全喝高了
[24:49] Look, I would so take him 其他任何时间都可以
[24:50] in any other circumstance, 但我现在完全喝高了 你兄弟们带你喝酒去了?
[24:51] but I’m pretty certain I’m completely wasted. 是Pam吗?
[24:54] Your brothers took you out drinking? 嘿! 把她叫出来
[24:55] Uh… – Is that Pam? 跟”妹力四射”演的一样
[24:57] Hey, have her come out. Have her come out. It’ll be like Coyote Ugly. 那是Michael 你和Michael在一起?
[25:01] That’s Michael. You’re out with Michael? 还有Dwight
[25:03] – And Dwight. – Hey-oh! – Pam 我也没办法
[25:05] Pam, it just happened. – 好吧 我送他去
[25:06] Okay, fine. I’ll take him. – 我爱你 好
[25:08] I love you. Okay. I got to go. 我走了 – 我爱你!
[25:10] I love you. 你催我挂电话?
[25:12] Are you pushing me off the phone? 没啊 我们好好聊聊
[25:13] No. Let’s talk for a long time. 拜拜吧
[25:15] Goodbye.
[25:16] Mmm. 过了半夜了
[25:18] It’s after midnight. 你结婚了
[25:20] You’re married. He’s married. 你结婚了! 程序不是这样
[25:22] That’s not how that works. 恭喜你
[25:25] Oh, my God. Congratulations. 你以后再也不能回嘴了
[25:26] You’re not going to be able to talk back. 以后啥事要报告Pam
[25:28] You’ll have Pam to answer to. 她会坐在家里说
[25:29] She’ll be sitting at home saying, “Jim 带孩子去动物园”
[25:31] “Jim, take the baby to the zoo, “因为我要坐在家里
[25:33] “because I want to sit at home and eat bonbons 吃夹心糖 剪脚趾甲”
[25:36] “and clip my toenails.” “Jim 快过来给我编辫子”
[25:38] “Jim, hey, why don’t you braid my hair? I want to watch TV.” “我要看电视” 这声音像青蛙Kermit
[25:42] Now you sound like Kermit. 你确定这路对吗?
[25:44] Are you sure this is the right way? 不确定 我和你一样
[25:46] Nope. I, like you, have never been here before. 从没来过 至少你开得慢一点
[25:50] Well, at least slow down a little bit 一路上的每次颠簸 都折磨着我的…
[25:53] because every little bump in the road is major pain on my scrotum. 阴囊 我没有叫你劈叉
[25:58] Look, I’m not the one who asked you to do a split 你还以前从没练过
[26:00] when you’ve never done one before. 我是想活跃气氛
[26:02] Well, I was trying to liven things up a little bit, okay? 我是在尽你的职责…
[26:04] I was kind of doing your job, so… 我的职责?
[26:05] My job? 我的职责是早上结婚
[26:07] My job is to get married in the morning. That’s my job. 那才是我的职责 也包括让大家在你的倒霉婚礼
[26:10] Well, it’s also to make sure we have a great time 度过一个好时光…
[26:12] at your stupid wedding, so… 谁与新娘共度了婚礼前夜? 噢耶!
[26:35] I spent the night with the bride, 她半夜上厕所时
[26:36] the night before the wedding. Oh, yeah. 踩了我的手 所以…
[26:41] She stepped on my hand on her way to the bathroom. Andy 我梦到你半夜哭了
[26:43] Andy, did I dream that you were crying through the night? 不是梦 是真的
[26:47] No. No, that was real. 拍张照片啊 可以保存的更久
[26:56] Why don’t you take a picture? Lt’ll last longer. 天啊 都没有隐私
[26:59] God! Can I get a little privacy? (造冰机器/通风口) 早上好 可以为您效劳吗?
[27:12] Good morning, how can I help you? 昨天夜里我留下一双婚礼用鞋在门外
[27:14] I left a pair of dress shoes in a bag outside my door last night 希望被清洗和擦亮
[27:18] to be cleaned and polished, but they haven’t been returned yet. 但还未归还
[27:22] You must be Mr. Malone. One moment, please. 您一定是Malone先生 请稍候
[27:25] Thank you. 谢谢 先生
[27:26] Sir, this is the man with the shoes. 这就是那个要求擦鞋的 Malone先生
[27:31] Mr. Malone, your shoes are gone. 您的鞋没了 被偷了?
[27:34] They were stolen? – 不是 被销毁了 – 什么?
[27:35] No, destroyed. 装鞋的袋子打开时 其味道熏晕了擦鞋员
[27:37] What? 装鞋的袋子打开时
[27:38] When the bag was opened by our shoe-shine, the smell overcame him. 其味道熏晕了擦鞋员 我也闻了一下
[27:42] I, too, smelled them and made the choice 然后做出决定
[27:45] that they must be thrown away. 您的鞋必须扔掉 –
[27:47] Incinerated, actually. 其实是烧掉了
[27:49] But that was my only pair of shoes. – 但那是我唯一的鞋
[27:52] It became a safety issue, sir. 那东西有安全隐患 先生
[27:55] Well… Damn it! 该死
[27:58] I can offer you a complimentary breakfast. 可以为您补偿免费早餐
[28:02] Okay. 行! 东西都拿好了?
[28:05] You have everything? Cell phone, charger? – 手机? 充电器? – 恩
[28:08] Yeah. Mmm-hmm. 你真不吃早餐吗?
[28:10] So, you sure you don’t want breakfast? 今天最重要的一顿饭
[28:11] It’s the most important meal of the day. 的确是的 但我不饿
[28:13] It really is. I’m not hungry. 你睡了以后
[28:15] I ate a whole bunch of sunflower seeds after you went to sleep. 我吃了一大袋瓜子
[28:18] And besides, I wouldn’t want to take you away from Pam 而且我不想在婚礼早晨 把你从Pam身边抢走
[28:20] on the morning of her wedding. 她需要你 Isabel
[28:22] She needs you, Isabel. 你好贴心 Dwight
[28:24] That’s really sweet, Dwight. 那我们婚礼见?
[28:26] So, I’ll see you at the wedding? – 你知道的 – 好
[28:27] You know it. Okay. – 好 你去吧 – 拜
[28:30] Okay, get out of here. 好吗?
[28:31] Bye. Okay? 嘿 早上好
[28:33] Hey, good morning. Hi. 时间差不多了
[28:35] It’s about damn time. 我一天半没去厕所了
[28:36] I haven’t gone to the bathroom in a day and a half. 天啊Dwight! 这房间是个猪窝
[28:38] Oh, my God, Dwight! This room is a pit. 是么 我没注意
[28:41] Really? Hadn’t noticed. Too busy knocking boots. 忙着做爱呢 你怎么吃得像个猪?
[28:50] How can you eat like that? 做了一晚的爱
[28:52] I’m ravenous after a night of lovemaking. 我饿死了 你呢?
[28:54] You? 我也很饿 但我不让自己变成猪八戒
[28:55] Yeah, I’m hungry. 嘿 她表现怎样?
[28:56] But I’m not going to make a pig out of myself. 嘿 她表现怎样?
[28:57] Hey, what was she like? 她很可爱 她很性感
[29:00] She was cute. You know, she was hot. She was very hot. 非常辣 她做起爱来像猛虎下山
[29:04] She made love like a tiger. 娘家人还是婆家人?
[29:06] Bride’s side or groom’s side or townie? 还是本地人? 她是欧洲来的
[29:09] She was from Europe. – 开玩笑吧 – 可不
[29:10] No kidding. Uh-huh. – 她没剪腋毛吧 – 没
[29:12] I bet she had hairy armpits. No. Isabel也不错 但我希望她别抱太多幻想
[29:13] Isabel was nice, but I hope she doesn’t think this is going anywhere. 怎么 你不喜欢她? 开什么玩笑?
[29:19] Wait a second. You’re not into her? Are you kidding me? – 没有
[29:23] No. She’s Pam’s best friend. – 她是Pam最好的朋友 你们可以四人约会
[29:25] You guys could double-date. Swap, maybe? – 或换妻? – 噢拜托 打死我吧
[29:27] Oh, please. Put a gun in my mouth. 不 你疯了
[29:29] No, you’re crazy. 她是Carbondale镇的洗牙医生
[29:30] Look, she’s a dental hygienist from Carbondale, 做起爱来也像洗牙 乡巴佬似的
[29:33] and she makes love like one. She’s a bumpkin. Pass. 免了吧 她…好吧
[29:35] She’s… Okay, do you know how hard it is to be a hygienist? 你知道洗牙多难吗? 先做X光
[29:38] You have to take X-rays, 把人牙齿的牙斑刮下来
[29:39] you have to scrape the plaque off of people’s teeth, 告诉小孩何时该吐
[29:42] you have to tell kids when to spit 而且牙医来的时候
[29:43] and make sure that they’re not scared when the dentist comes in. 安慰小朋友别害怕
[29:46] It, it… 你应该去约她
[29:48] You should ask her out. 我已经有欧洲女朋友了
[29:50] I already have my European girlfriend.
[29:57] If your hat hits me in the face one more time…
[30:00] That’s funny. Your wife loved this hat the last time she saw it. 我的天啊 你很痛吗? 因为昨晚的事? 不疼
[30:13] Oh, my God. 大家都夸张了
[30:15] Oh! 婚礼会让我非常情绪化
[30:17] Oscar. Angela. 我有女人的一面
[30:21] Are you in a lot of pain? 他们说你一直哭
[30:23] What, because of last night? No way. 这个嘛…
[30:26] Reports have been exaggerated. 胯部受伤是最糟糕的
[30:28] Weddings make me very emotional. 不说我也知道
[30:30] I just have that side to me. 我没跟你说 –
[30:33] Yeah, people say you cry all the time. 宝贝还剩下多少? – 什么?
[30:35] Well, that’s not… 没有给你割掉?
[30:39] Crotch injuries are the worst. 没有–没有割掉!
[30:41] You don’t need to tell me. 谁告诉你的?
[30:44] I wasn’t telling you. 我编造了一些谣言
[30:45] There’s still something there? 我很紧张
[30:47] Excuse me? 我要结婚了
[30:49] They didn’t get torn off? 你坐这上面吧…
[30:51] No, they didn’t… Nothing got torn off. Who told you that? 木头椅子会让你受损的小JJ疼痛的
[30:56] I may have told some people that. 这样柔软些
[30:58] I’m nervous. I’m about to get married. 是睾丸
[31:02] If you want to sit on this. 的确很软 谢谢
[31:04] I was thinking the wood might be too hard on your damaged penis. 没什么
[31:08] Make it softer. 就是这里
[31:13] It’s my scrotum, and it was. 他们说要现金 但我每周都发放现金
[31:17] Thank you. Sure. 所以 一个人能需要多少现金呢?
[31:25] Oh. Here we go. 我严格要求自己 给一些特殊的礼物
[31:26] They asked for cash. But you know, I give them cash every week. 我画了他们俩的肖像 留做纪念
[31:30] So, how much cash does a person need? 我还画了他们俩的裸体像
[31:32] I have taken it upon myself to do something a little more special. 但那是留给我自己的 我送给他们煮乌龟的锅
[31:36] I have painted a portrait of the two of them from memory. 龟壳榔头 和围裙 从你肚子划一刀?
[31:43] And I have another one of them in the nude. But that one is for me. 别把小宝宝挤着! 谢谢你 小傻瓜
[31:54] I got them a set of turtle boiling pots, shell hammer and bibs. 大家都看到Kristy接的金发了吧? 就好象用塑料扫帚做的 我来了
[32:01] Is it zipping over your belly? Don’t squish the baby. 亲爱的 你好漂亮
[32:04] Thank you, weirdo. 谢谢妈妈
[32:05] Everybody see Kristy’s stupid blonde extensions? 谢谢妈妈 – 我希望他配得上你 – 他配得上
[32:08] It’s like they were made from a plastic broom. 你确定吗
[32:10] Okay, here I come. 你没必要必须结婚的 的确没必要
[32:12] – Oh! – Pam! 妈妈 不要强加于别人 别拉她后腿了
[32:14] Darling, you look beautiful. 是的 谢谢妈妈
[32:17] Thanks, Mom. 嘿 我要出去见Dwight
[32:19] I hope he deserves you. 很好
[32:20] He does. 我们一会见
[32:21] Are you sure? Remember, you don’t have to do this. You don’t. 等等
[32:25] Mom, you’re totally projecting and being a drag. 什么?
[32:27] Yes, thank you, Mom. 噢
[32:29] Hey, I’m going to go outside and talk to Dwight. 不
[32:32] Okay, great. Yeah, I’ll see you in a second. 你可以过来吗?
[32:35] Wait. What? 允许的吗? 不允许 但我允许了 你过来吧
[32:38] Oh, no. 你真是冰雪聪明 你好 陌生人 我漂亮吗?
[32:45] Hey. 噢
[32:46] Can you come here, please? 不错
[32:47] Isebelle Is this allowed?
[32:49] No, no. But I’m allowing it. Just come here. 很高兴见到你
[32:54] That was an intelligent comment. 有什么事? 没什么…
[32:56] Hello, stranger. How do I look? 了
[32:58] Oh! Fine. Isabel? Nice to see you. 那么 再说一遍Filene商店
[33:03] What do you want? 与Filene地下商店的不同 他也不和我一起坐
[33:06] Nothing. Anymore. 你在哪坐? 你需要座位吗 伙计?
[33:10] So, tell me again 我站着 我是伴娘
[33:11] the difference between Filene’s and Filene’s Basement. 我希望我也是伴娘
[33:16] Hey, hey. He’s not sitting with me, either. Where are you sitting? Do you need a seat buddy? 我该去哪呢?
[33:22] I’m standing. I’m a bridesmaid. – 你看起来… – 很难看
[33:24] Oh. I wish I was a bridesmaid. 如此美丽
[33:27] Where am I gonna go? 我的面纱破了
[33:29] Hey. 我知道我们要结婚了
[33:32] Wow. You look… Terrible. 而且我怀了五个月的身孕
[33:37] …so beautiful. 我也不能穿我一直想要的
[33:40] Hey. 婚纱和高跟鞋 嘿
[33:43] My veil tore. 你就是我想象中的样子
[33:47] I knew when we were getting married and I’m five months pregnant, Pam 你好漂亮
[33:50] that I’m not going to be able to wear the dress that I always wanted, 谢谢
[33:53] or high heels. 谁在乎呢?
[33:55] Hey, you look just as I imagined you. 只是个破面纱而已
[34:00] Pam, you’re so pretty. 不 我唯一能戴上的就是这面纱了
[34:04] Thank you. 我们公平了
[34:06] And who cares? It’s a stupid veil, right? 每个人都让我发疯
[34:10] No, this is the one thing I was supposed 我对Andy的睾丸知道的太详细了
[34:12] to be able to control, was this veil. There. Now we’re even. 我妈妈一直对爸爸的新女朋友发飚
[34:34] Everyone’s driving me crazy. 这是我们的婚礼!
[34:37] I know way too much about Andy’s scrotum. 为什么要把这么多人请来? Pam做逃跑新娘是因为
[34:41] And my mom won’t stop freaking out 她内心深处知道她不是个好妻子 没错
[34:42] about my dad’s new girlfriend. 你干吗? 我要决定是否 有时间去撒尿
[34:47] This is supposed to be our wedding day. – 撒尿要多久啊?
[34:50] Why did we invite all these people? – 撒尿是很快 Oscar
[35:09] I think Pam ran away because she knew deep down 关键是把领带戴回去
[35:11] she wouldn’t be a good wife. Yes. 很费时间
[35:16] What are you doing? 你包里有零食吗?
[35:17] I’m trying to decide if I have time to pee.
[35:19] How long do you take to pee? 你是妈妈
[35:20] The peeing is fast, Oscar. 我觉得你也许有…
[35:22] It’s getting my tie back on. 杏饼 你有Very Berry或Ocean Splash吗?
[35:27] Hey. Hi. Would you have a snack in your purse? – 没有 – 好吧
[35:33] You’re a mom, I just figured you might have one. 你要自己留着吗? 噢不 没什么的 我只是…
[35:35] Yeah. 我这个周末很难过
[35:36] Oh! Ooh! Apricot. 我这个周末很难过
[35:38] Do you have any of the Very Berry or Ocean Splash, or… 很遗憾
[35:41] No. 啊 杏饼
[35:42] Okay. Were you saving it? 大猩猩制造 –
[35:45] No, no. That’s okay. I’ve just… 婚礼取消了吗? –
[35:49] I’ve had a very rough weekend. 别紧张 你追Jim会有机会的
[35:51] Oh, I’m sorry. 他们俩把办公室当做了 1970年的”解码派对”
[35:56] Apricot. Made of real apes. 我的周末目前也很糟糕
[35:59] Do you think they canceled the wedding? 我来这里是希望有邂逅
[36:01] Relax, you’ll get your shot at Jim. 你知道的
[36:04] Those two treat the whole office like a 1970s key party. 婚礼上大家都有期待 结果我在通风口过的夜
[36:09] My weekend was bad so far. 很吵闹 但挺暖和的
[36:11] Oh! 太糟糕了
[36:13] I came here hoping to meet somebody, 我一生至爱
[36:15] you know, as you do at weddings. 在和别人约会 完全…
[36:19] End up going to sleep by the vending machine. 今年不是恋爱年
[36:23] It was loud, but it was warm. 我猜也是
[36:24] That sounds awful. 我想把我的精子冷冻起来 劳驾
[36:25] And the love of my life is dating somebody else. 你是Michael Scott?
[36:30] Just… 是的
[36:32] It is a terrible year for love. 你身上戴着”欢呼手绢”吗 我们的妹妹马上要出炉了
[36:34] Yeah, I guess it is. 我们要在她出来时捉弄她
[36:37] Thinking about having my sperm frozen. 哦哇 好搞笑
[36:41] Excuse me, you Michael Scott? 我有的
[36:43] Yeah. 给你们 请健康使用
[36:44] Heard you might have a whoopee cushion on you. 哇哇 别操之过急
[36:46] Our sister’s in the can and we totally want to get her 收回结婚礼品的礼仪是什么 只能拿回自己的?
[36:48] when she comes back. 还是随心所欲的拿?
[36:49] Oh… 还是随心所欲的拿?
[36:50] Wow. That sounds hilarious. I do, actually. 谁想和我的锅交换?
[36:54] There you go, use it in good health. – 可以做热狗吗?
[36:55] Yes. – 不能
[36:58] Wait a minute. What is the etiquette on taking the gifts? 那谁要啊?
[37:01] Can you only take your own back? 同志们
[37:02] Or is it a whatever-you-can-carry thing? 在我们三光政策之前 可以再等等吗
[37:05] Anyone have anything they want to trade for a toaster? 我要向JIM发出正式的投诉函
[37:08] Does it have slots for hot dogs? No. 他让我们等了整整一小时
[37:11] Who would want it? 天啊
[37:12] Guys, maybe we should wait a little more time
[37:15] before we start grabbing boxes.
[37:18] Toby.
[37:19] Dwight. 你 进去
[37:20] I’d like to lodge a formal complaint against Jim 你
[37:22] for making us wait for over an hour. 进去
[37:24] God. Crap! 我看这婚是结不成了 也许这是他们的结局
[37:33] Come here, you. Get in there. 嘿 出什么事了? 你们去哪了?
[37:37] Well, I guess this wedding is not going to happen. 知道我在这里等了多久吗? 我们来了 那就开始吧 好!
[37:40] I wonder if this is it for them? 我内心充满了喜悦 我帅吗?
[37:45] – Hey, what happened? Where were you guys?
[37:47] Do you know how long I’ve been waiting here? 你很帅
[37:49] Well, we are here now, so let’s go. – 你很帅
[37:51] Yes! Yes! 领带戴多了? 我求他们别这样的
[37:53] I have so much joy in my heart right now. How do I look? 我知道你特别要求 不许播放这首曲子的
[37:58] You look great. – 我说过
[37:59] You look great. – 对不起
[38:03] Wear a tie much? 去跳吧 轮到你了
[38:34] Oh, boy. 怎么了? 你同意吗?
[38:41] I begged them not to. 我没事的
[38:42] Mmm-hmm. 那好吧
[38:43] – I know you specifically put this song on your do-not-play list.
[38:46] Yes, I did. 嘿Pam
[38:47] I’m sorry. 你看过吗 youtube演过
[38:49] – Go ahead, I think it’s your turn.
[38:52] Wait, what happened? You’re okay with this? 看过
[38:53] Yeah, I’m okay. 我看到youtube视频时
[38:55] Okay, then. 就买了船票 我知道必须有个后备计划
[38:58] Hey, Pam? Did you see this? It was on YouTube. 船上婚礼是C计划
[39:00] Saw it. 教堂是B计划
[41:39] I bought those boat tickets the day I saw that YouTube video. 计划A是
[41:43] I knew we’d need a backup plan. 很久很久以前娶她!
[41:45] The boat was actually plan C. The church was plan B. 也就是我遇见她的第一天
[41:48] And plan A was marrying her a long, long time ago. 好棒的派对
[41:54] Pretty much the day I met her. 是我参加的最好的婚礼
[42:06] What an awesome party! The best wedding I’ve ever been to. 我拿到6个女孩的电话
[42:11] I got six numbers. 再多一个就凑成一个电话号码了
[42:13] One more would have been a complete telephone number. 简直是史诗
[42:18] This was epic. 我的”纸巾盒鞋”是大家的大谈资
[42:20] My Kleenex shoes were a huge conversation piece. But, man, my dogs are barking. 但是老天
[42:33] Ooh! 脚踝痛死了
[42:35] My feet were so sweaty, I can’t even feel the cold. 我的脚出了很多汗
[42:40] What a lovely hotel. 所以感觉不到冷
[42:42] Okay. 多么棒的酒店
办公室(美版)

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