| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:07] | I have the best stocked survival shelter in northeastern Pennsylvania. | 我在宾州东北部 有一个最好的囤积粮仓 |
| [00:10] | But everything has a shelf life. | 但所有的东西都是有保质期的 |
| [00:12] | So I must eat and then replace everything that’s about to expire. | 所以我得吃掉快过期的 好换上新鲜的 |
| [00:16] | It’s nice not to have to plan my meals. | 不用为吃什么费神 真好 |
| [00:18] | You’re eating eight-year-old tomatoes. | 你在吃放了八年的西红柿 |
| [00:20] | They’re still good for another week. | 还有一个星期才过期呢 |
| [00:22] | You know, I think I might have some type of cheese | 我想在我的冰箱后面 可能还剩下丁点芝士 |
| [00:23] | in the back of my fridge you might like. | 你可能会喜欢 |
| [00:25] | I’ve got some cheese you might like, too. | 我也有点芝士你可能会喜欢 |
| [00:28] | In between my toes. | 在我的脚指间 |
| [00:30] | Hardy-har-har. All right, picture this. | 吃苦耐劳啊 好吧 想象一下 |
| [00:33] | Snowy ash drizzles from the sky. | 像雪一样的灰尘如细雨般从天而降 |
| [00:35] | A rabid pack of dogs surrounds you | 你们被一群凶猛滴狗团团围住 |
| [00:38] | as the flame at the end of your stick dies out. | 火把的最后一丝火苗即将燃尽 |
| [00:40] | There’s only one hope left for you, the door to my shelter. | 而你们现在的唯一希望 就是我粮仓的大门 |
| [00:43] | You pound. You beg. “Dwight, please let me in.” | 你们猛敲着门 乞求着 德怀特 求求你让我们进来吧 |
| [00:46] | But I ignore your cries and do not let you in. You want to know why? | 但我无视你们的哀求 不让你们进来 你们想知道是为什么吗? |
| [00:49] | Because of the sign that says, “No pounding. No begging.” | 因为门上的告示牌 上面写着严禁猛敲门 严禁乞求 |
| [00:51] | No, because you laughed at me. | 不是 是因为你们嘲笑了我 |
| [00:53] | Kevin will be eaten. Pam will be taken slave. | 凯文会被吃掉 帕姆会成为奴隶 |
| [00:57] | Jim will be made a warlord’s jester. Meredith will do okay. | 吉姆会成为军阀的小丑 梅雷迪思会没啥事 |
| [01:00] | Be assured this day will come. It’s just a matter of time. | 等着这天的到来吧 只是时间问题 |
| [01:03] | Could be one month, could be two months. | 有可能是一个月 有可能是两个月 |
| [01:05] | Three months. Could be. | –三个月 –有可能 |
| [01:08] | Four months. | 四个月 |
| [01:10] | I see that happening, yes. | 我认为有可能 对 |
| [01:11] | Eight months? | 八个月? |
| [01:14] | That’s a realistic timeline. | 挺现实的 |
| [01:16] | Eleven months. | –11个月 |
| [01:19] | Perhaps. | –或许吧 |
| [01:20] | Okay, wait, now really think hard about this one. | 或许吧 好了 等一下 认真考虑一下这个 |
| [01:23] | One year. | 一年 |
| [01:26] | I could see that as a very real possibility. | 是个非常现实的可能性 |
| [01:28] | Four hundred and ninety-four months. | 494个月 |
| [01:31] | I could see that happening. | 我认为有可能 |
| [01:33] | Four hundred and ninety-five months. That’s just… | 495个月 这简直 (斯克兰顿 欢迎您) 办公室 |
| [01:57] | I really thought I was becoming too much of a womanizer. | 我觉得我越来越花心过头了 |
| [02:00] | I realized I had shirts in five different women’s houses. | 在五个不同女人家里 都有我的衬衫 |
| [02:03] | Still not seeing the problem there. | –还是没看出来你有什么问题呀 |
| [02:04] | All right. | –好吧 |
| [02:05] | Truth is, I got a couple love bumps on my ding-dong, | 事实是 我小弟弟上染了点疱疹 |
| [02:08] | so I was like, “Game over.” | 所以我就 噢 玩完噜 |
| [02:11] | It was the best of times. It was the “awesomest” of times. | 那是最美好的时光 那是最非常棒的时光 |
| [02:14] | And now Packer wants to come home. | 现在 帕克想回家了 |
| [02:17] | And look who’s here to sign off on it. | 看看谁是签核的人 |
| [02:20] | My boo, Holly. | 我的 噗 霍利 |
| [02:23] | Hi. | Hi. –嗨 –嗨 |
| [02:26] | You must be Todd. | –你一定是托德了 |
| [02:27] | Whoa, I’m sorry. | –哇哦 不好意思 |
| [02:29] | Michael, I thought we were meeting Holly today, | 迈克 |
| [02:31] | not Jennifer Aniston. | 我以为我们今天是来见霍利的 不是珍妮弗–安妮斯顿呀 |
| [02:33] | Very funny. | 你真搞笑 |
| [02:35] | Okay, let’s get started. After you. | –好 开始吧 –你先请 |
| [02:36] | Okay. | 好 |
| [02:41] | Michael, this’ll be just us. | –迈克 我和他单独谈 –啊 |
| [02:43] | Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. | 没错 没错 没错 |
| [02:45] | Just so you know, he’s at his funniest | 你要是灌他五杯 |
| [02:48] | when you’ve given him, like, five shots. | 他会到达搞笑的顶峰 |
| [02:49] | Okay. | –好 |
| [02:51] | And it also helps if you’ve had five shots. | –要是你也已五杯下肚 效果会更好 |
| [02:52] | I already have. | 我已经喝了 |
| [02:58] | Why is Packer back? | 为什么帕克要回来? |
| [02:59] | Is Packer here? | 帕克来了? |
| [03:00] | Why is he talking to Holly? | 为什么他在跟霍利谈话? |
| [03:02] | Don’t know, don’t care. | 不知道 不关心 |
| [03:03] | Michael loves you, and your sales speak for themselves. So… | 迈克很喜欢你 你的业绩也有目共睹 所以 |
| [03:10] | Yes! The Pack is back. | 耶! 帕克归队了 |
| [03:13] | Ladies and gentlemen, I would like to introduce you | 女士先生们 我给你们隆重介绍 |
| [03:15] | to a man who needs no introduction, | 一个不需要介绍的人 |
| [03:16] | probably because most of you have done it with him. | 很有可能因为你们都已认识他 |
| [03:19] | Just kidding. He wouldn’t be interested in any of you. | 开个玩笑 他对你们谁都不感兴趣 |
| [03:21] | In all seriousness, | 我庄重地宣布 |
| [03:23] | Todd Packer is a permanent salesman at this branch. | 托德 帕克现在是 本分公司的固定销售员了 |
| [03:27] | And I would like to invite you now to welcome him with open arms. | 我现在想请你们张开双臂 热烈欢迎他 |
| [03:30] | Yes! What? | –好的！ –什么？ |
| [03:33] | It’s great to be among friends. | 能与朋友同行真好 |
| [03:35] | And until then, you suckers will do. | 但直到那刻到来之前 我就将就一下你们这帮废柴吧 |
| [03:38] | Nice. | 太好了 |
| [03:39] | – We got burned. – You did. | –我们完蛋了 –是啊 |
| [03:42] | You got burned, because Packer’s back. | 你们完蛋了 因为帕克回来了 |
| [03:44] | Packer is turning in his car for a desk. | 帕克正把他的车变成一张桌子 |
| [03:47] | He is turning in his condoms for a condominium, | 把他的套套变成套间 |
| [03:51] | although he’s probably going to have to use condoms from here on out. | 虽然从现在开始 他很可能真得用套套了 |
| [03:54] | Holly. You approved this? | –霍利 是你同意的? |
| [03:56] | Yes, I did. | –是的 没错 |
| [03:57] | I think Todd’s gonna make a great addition to the staff. | 我认为托德会给我们的员工增色不少 |
| [03:59] | You did approve it? Yeah. | –你真的同意了? –对 |
| [04:01] | What don’t you understand about the word “approved”? | 你们不懂同意了这词是什么意思吗? |
| [04:04] | It seems a couple of you don’t know | 看到你们当中有些人 |
| [04:06] | what the word “approved” means. | 好像不知道同意了是什么意思 |
| [04:09] | I have very little patience for stupidity. | 我对愚蠢一点耐性都没有 |
| [04:13] | Sorry we’re late. Gabe fell in the shower. | 不好意思 我们迟到了 加布洗澡的时候摔倒了 |
| [04:15] | Such a klutz. | 真是笨手笨脚 |
| [04:16] | Yeah, and it took the fire department forever to get there. | 对啊 等了几个世纪 消防员才出现 |
| [04:19] | Oh, my God. Where did this come from? | 我的天啊 这是哪儿来的? |
| [04:23] | Who did this? | 谁送的? |
| [04:24] | I got Erin a new computer | 我给伊尔琳弄了台新电脑 |
| [04:26] | because the one at reception sucked. | 因为原来在前台的那台烂死了 |
| [04:28] | I should know. | 我深有体会 |
| [04:29] | And I don’t want to say the other one was old, | 我不想说原来那台老掉牙了 |
| [04:31] | but its IP number was one. | 可它的IP地址是1 |
| [04:36] | Right? | 你懂的吧? |
| [04:38] | Thank you, Pam. | –谢谢你 |
| [04:39] | Oh, you’re welcome. | 帕姆 –您太客气了 |
| [04:40] | My pleasure. | 我的荣幸 |
| [04:50] | Can I do something for you? | 你找我有事儿吗? |
| [04:51] | I just helped someone out. It feels good. | 我刚当了回雷锋 感觉真好 |
| [04:53] | Nice. | 值得表扬 |
| [04:55] | You know, I cleaned up our daughter for, | 你知道 |
| [04:57] | like, an hour at 4:00 a.m. this morning, so… | 我今天早上四点就爬起来 花了整个小时给咱闺女洗洗干净 |
| [04:59] | So you know the feeling. | 所以你也感同身受啦 |
| [05:02] | Special delivery for Dwight K. Schrute. | –德怀特斯库鲁特 |
| [05:04] | I didn’t order anything. | 你的快递 –我啥都没买啊 |
| [05:05] | And I don’t have anything for you, | 我也没有快递给你 |
| [05:06] | but I do want to talk to you about something. | 但我想和你说点事儿 |
| [05:08] | We have been thinking about where Packer should sit, | 我们一直在想帕克座位的事儿 |
| [05:11] | and we can’t just sit around waiting for Creed to die. | 我们等不及克里德什么时候死掉 |
| [05:14] | Well, there’s a lot of seats in the annex. | 后面扩建那儿好多位子呢 |
| [05:15] | So you wouldn’t mind permanently relocating | 所以说你不介意 把你的位置永久性搬走 |
| [05:17] | so that Packer can take this desk here. | 让给帕克来坐这咯? |
| [05:20] | Thanks, man. It would mean a lot to me. | 谢了 哥们 这对我意义重大 |
| [05:22] | I’ve been sitting here for 10 years, Michael. | 我坐这儿十年了迈克 |
| [05:25] | Well, I was there for 12 years. | 我坐这儿十二年了 |
| [05:27] | Plus, my name’s carved under the desk. | 还有 桌子下面还刻着我的名字 |
| [05:29] | No, it is not. It is too. | –才没有 –就是有 |
| [05:30] | Where? Let me see this. | –哪儿? |
| [05:32] | Right there. | 看我看看 –就在下面 |
| [05:33] | Check it out. | 找找看吧 |
| [05:35] | Michael, I don’t want to move desks. | –迈克 |
| [05:37] | Don’t be a baby. We’re… | 我不想挪地儿 –别孩子气了 |
| [05:38] | Okay, there it is. | 好了 找到了 |
| [05:39] | “Packer was here and so was your mom.” | 帕克与你老妈到此一游 |
| [05:41] | Yeah. | –太好了 |
| [05:42] | Do I have any say in this? | –我能说句话吗? |
| [05:43] | No! | No! –不！ –不能！ |
| [05:45] | It’s $20 to watch, Halpert. | 20块看一次 哈尔佩特 |
| [05:48] | Hey. Whose dirt box is this? | 这谁的泥盒子? |
| [05:51] | That’s our Zen garden. | 那是我们的禅园 |
| [05:52] | What do you growing here, bull crap? | 你们能在里面种啥? 屁话吗? |
| [05:59] | Hey, Holly. | 嘿 霍利 |
| [06:01] | Hey. What’s up, guys? | –你好 怎么了? |
| [06:02] | Don’t “what’s up” us. | 伙计们？ –少装了 |
| [06:04] | You think you’re so cute with your pretty blond hair. | 有头好看的金发 就以为自己很可爱了? |
| [06:08] | Pull it back. Why did you hire Todd Packer? | 冷静 你为什么要雇托德 帕克? |
| [06:11] | He’s seriously awful. | 他这人真得很讨厌 |
| [06:13] | Michael’s recommendation was glowing. | 迈克的推荐很给力 |
| [06:15] | And honestly, he’s been nothing but nice to me. | 实话说 他对我除了很好还是很好 |
| [06:17] | That’s how he gets you to take off your panties. | 他就是用这招骗你上床的 |
| [06:20] | Why are you nodding? | –你点头干吗? |
| [06:21] | United front. | –统一战线 |
| [06:23] | Okay, look, we can’t fire someone because we don’t like him. | 听着 不能因为不喜欢一个人 就开除他 |
| [06:26] | Right. This isn’t the U.S. government. | 说的对 我们不是美国政府啊 |
| [06:27] | What are you referencing? | 你在影射什么? |
| [06:30] | Everything. | Everything. 各种影射 你们懂的 |
| [06:32] | Do any of you have any concrete complaints about something he’s done? | 你们能提点实在点的例子吗? |
| [06:35] | Well, I mean, he humped Michael. | 他刚刚上了迈克 |
| [06:37] | Well, if that’s the case, I guess I’ve got to be fired, too. | 要这么说 我也得被炒鱿鱼了 |
| [06:43] | Hey. Hey, you guys. | 嘿 嘿 大家注意了 |
| [06:44] | The Yarmouth Regatta video is up. Gather round. Check it out. | 雅茅斯风帆赛的视频出来了 一起过来看啊 |
| [06:48] | This guy’s on a full beam reach. | 这人正使劲向前驶呢 |
| [06:50] | They’re hiking out like mad. | 他们使劲弯着身子呢 |
| [06:51] | Luff him up. Luff him up. | 抢风行驶 抢风行驶 |
| [06:54] | Nice! | 漂亮啊! |
| [06:57] | This computer’s a hunk of junk. | 这电脑就一堆垃圾 |
| [06:59] | Hey, sailor, come watch your regatta over here. | 水手 过来这儿看比赛吧 |
| [07:02] | Where did you get this? | –这电脑你哪儿弄来的? |
| [07:03] | Pam gave it to me. | –帕姆给的 |
| [07:07] | This is a sick computer. | 这电脑太牛逼了 |
| [07:09] | Gwen Stefani has this computer. | 格温史蒂芬妮就有一台 |
| [07:12] | Pamela. Yep? | –那个 帕米拉 –啥事儿? |
| [07:13] | What does a guy have to do to whom to get one of them? | 要给什么人什么好处 才能换台这样的电脑? |
| [07:18] | You have a computer, Andy. | 你不是有台电脑嘛 安迪 |
| [07:20] | Yeah, but if you donated my computer to Africa, | 没错儿 但要是把我的电脑捐去非洲 |
| [07:21] | it would become famous as the slowest computer in Africa. | 它将会是非洲速度最慢的电脑 |
| [07:24] | Okay, listen, we just don’t have the budget for it, okay? | 好吧 听着 我们的预算真的不够 好吗? |
| [07:27] | Reception needed a computer, so we got one. | 前台需要一部电脑 所以才给买了 |
| [07:29] | Well, Andy’s desk needs a computer. | 安迪办公桌那需要台电脑 |
| [07:32] | And, I mean, it’s just kind of a coincidence that I work there, but… | 我只是凑巧坐在那儿了 但. |
| [07:35] | Yes, but reception is a one-person department. | 没错 但前台这个部门只有一个人 |
| [07:37] | If I get you a new computer, I have to get one for everyone in sales, | 要是我给你换台新电脑 销售部的其他人也得换 |
| [07:40] | for Dwight, for Stanley. It would be crazy. | 德怀特啦斯坦利啦 太不合理了 |
| [07:43] | So something good happening to Stanley is crazy now. | 斯坦利走个运都变不合理了 |
| [07:47] | They’re not asking for one. | 他们没人说要换啊 |
| [07:48] | I am. I need it. | 我说换而已 |
| [07:49] | If you’re just handing them out, I want one, too. | 如果你要发的话 我也要一台 |
| [07:52] | Phyllis, nobody’s handing anything out. | –菲利斯没人随便发东西啦 |
| [07:54] | See? That’s what I’m talking about. | –看到了吧 我就怕事情变成这样 |
| [07:56] | What, are you gonna play mahjongg faster? | 换了电脑打麻将就快了? |
| [07:58] | I’m sorry, Andy. | 真的抱歉 安迪 |
| [08:04] | Hey, what’s going on, you guys? | 你们怎么样了? |
| [08:06] | Yeah. | –对哦 |
| [08:07] | Three muske-queers. | –三个同性恋 |
| [08:09] | Mean, but good. | 很贱 但说的好 |
| [08:11] | So, Todd, this must be nice for you, getting off the road. | 托德 能闲下来感觉不错吧 |
| [08:14] | You get to spend some time with your daughter. | 能多陪陪你闺女了 |
| [08:16] | I don’t know. | 我不知道呃 |
| [08:17] | I love her and all, but she’s turned into a bitch. | 我的确爱她 但她越大越三八 |
| [08:20] | Most days she’s great, but some days she acts like her mom. | 大部分时候都很好 但有时候就像她妈 |
| [08:23] | Well, some girls go through a phase. | 女孩子成长时都会经历一个过程 |
| [08:25] | Yeah. Your life is so insane. | 是啊 你的生活太疯狂了 |
| [08:27] | You should write a book. | 你应该出本书 |
| [08:29] | Since when did you learn how to read? | 你啥时候开始认字儿了? |
| [08:31] | I do know how to read, though. | 我真的认字儿呢 |
| [08:33] | Yeah. You know how to read a menu. | 是啊 你认识菜单上的字 |
| [08:37] | This guy… | 这家伙 |
| [08:42] | I… He’s right. I mean, I could lose some weight. | 我 他说得对 我是可以减减肥的 |
| [08:46] | Kevin, in sumo culture, | 凯文 在相扑文化中 |
| [08:49] | you’d be considered a promising up-and-comer. | 你会非常有前途啊 |
| [08:57] | What the heck? Why do you have Erin’s computer? | 嘛回事? 为啥伊尔琳的电脑在你这? |
| [09:01] | It’s crazy, right? | 真疯狂 是吧? |
| [09:02] | Erin just wanted me to have it, so we switched. | 伊尔琳想给我用 所以我们换电脑了 |
| [09:04] | What? Erin, is that true? | 什么? 伊尔琳 是真的吗? |
| [09:07] | I just thought he seemed to really need a new computer, | 我只是想 他好像真的很需要一部新电脑 |
| [09:09] | and he knows so much about that one. | 他还很会用那部新的 |
| [09:10] | Erin, it’s not up to you. This computer was for reception, okay? | 伊尔琳 这不是由你来决定的 这是前台的电脑 好吗? |
| [09:14] | It’s not yours to give away. | 不是你说给人就给人的 |
| [09:18] | Pam. | 帕姆 |
| [09:19] | When I’m freaking out, I just sort of step back, | 当我情绪失控时 我会先退一步 |
| [09:22] | take three deep breaths. I’m not freaking out. Okay? | –深呼吸三下 –我没失控 好吧? |
| [09:25] | And then I ask myself, | 然后我会问我自己 |
| [09:27] | “Is this worth freaking out about?” | 这事真值得我情绪失控吗? |
| [09:30] | Andy, why should she have your crappy computer? | 安迪 为什么她就应该用你的破电脑? |
| [09:33] | That’s interesting. | 这问题有趣 |
| [09:34] | So you also think my computer’s crappy. | 连你都觉得我的电脑很破吧 |
| [09:36] | Switch the computers back, Andy. | 把电脑换回来 安迪 |
| [09:40] | Seriously? Seriously. | –你说真的? –真的 |
| [09:42] | Pam, come on. | 帕姆 别这样 |
| [09:44] | – Now, please. – Fine! | –立刻 谢谢 –好吧！ |
| [09:49] | Please make sure nobody is humping me. | 请确保没人趁机硬上弓 |
| [09:52] | If you’re going back to the annex, | 噢 |
| [09:53] | could you take these to Dwight? | 要是你正在回去扩建区 你能把这个拿给德怀特吗? |
| [09:54] | I think the ants are waking up. | 我想蚂蚁们正在醒来呢 |
| [09:56] | They need to start farming soon. | 它们很快就要去耕田啦 |
| [09:58] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [09:59] | Best day ever. | Best day ever. 今天是最好的一天 最好的一天啊 |
| [10:02] | So much is happening. | 发生了好多事儿呢 |
| [10:04] | Question. Should I get stripes shaved into the side of my head? | 问题 我应该把我一边的头发 剃成条纹状吗? |
| [10:08] | No. No. | –别 |
| [10:09] | Please. | 别 –求求你了 |
| [10:10] | Did Todd tell you to do that? Yes. | –托德叫你这么做的吗 –是的 |
| [10:12] | Yeah, I thought so. You love him, right? | –好吧 我觉得是 –你很喜欢他 是吧? |
| [10:15] | You love him. I can tell. | 你很喜欢他 我看得出来 |
| [10:16] | I love you. No, no, not me. | –我爱你 –不不 不是说我呢 |
| [10:18] | Him. What… | 说他 怎么 |
| [10:19] | He’s certainly opinionated. | 他是挺顽固的 |
| [10:21] | If you’re not gonna take the ants over, | 你要是不准备把蚂蚁拿过去 |
| [10:22] | I should probably just do it myself. I’m going. | –或许我自己来吧 –我会拿过去的 |
| [10:24] | No. Are you jealous of him because you think he’s funnier than you? | 不 你在妒忌他吗? 因为你觉得他比你搞笑? |
| [10:30] | Honey. | –亲爱的 |
| [10:31] | I don’t think he’s funnier than me. | –我不觉得他比我搞笑 |
| [10:32] | He’s funnier than me. | 他却比我搞笑呐 |
| [10:34] | He’s not funny at all. | 他一点都不搞笑 |
| [10:36] | So I’m less funny than not funny at all? | 所以我比一点都不搞笑更不搞笑? |
| [10:38] | Hey, oh-oh, I think the ants are starting to eat each other. | 我想蚂蚁们开始互相对吃了 |
| [10:40] | No, what I’m saying is he’s not funny, but you’re funnier than he is. | 不 我说的是 他不搞笑 但你比他搞笑 |
| [10:46] | Okay, Bill Cosby, Steve Martin, | 好吧 比尔考斯比 史提夫马丁 |
| [10:50] | Charlie Bit My Finger, | 查理咬我手指了 |
| [10:51] | Michael Scott, then all the way down here, | 迈克斯科特 然后一直到这下面 |
| [10:55] | Todd Packer. | 就是托德 帕克的位置 |
| [10:57] | That’s insane. | –太荒唐了 |
| [10:58] | Honey, he’s a jerk. | –亲爱的 他是个混球 |
| [11:00] | For Pete’s sake, it just needs to be done. | 老天爷呐 一定要拿过去了 |
| [11:08] | So you two are married now, right? | –你们俩结婚了哈? |
| [11:10] | Yeah. | –好的 |
| [11:12] | That’s sweet. How’s the sex? | 真的 性生活怎么样了? |
| [11:14] | – Yeah. – Hey, Packer, | –是啊 –嘿 帕克 |
| [11:16] | I made you some hot chocolate. | 我给你冲了热巧克力 |
| [11:19] | Why? | –为啥? |
| [11:20] | ‘Cause I want to let bygones be bygones, | –因为我想把过去的事抛诸于脑后 |
| [11:22] | show you I’m cool. | 告诉你 我不介意了 |
| [11:23] | You’re the new guy. It’s cold out. I made too much. | 你是新人 外面很冷 我又冲多了 |
| [11:25] | I got this awesome hot chocolate recipe from my wife. | 我从我老婆那儿学的 一个超好喝的热巧克力配方 |
| [11:27] | That’s a lot of reasons. | 原因还挺多的 |
| [11:29] | Drink it. | 喝了吧 |
| [11:30] | I think I’ll pass. | 我想还是算了 |
| [11:32] | The only hot chocolate I’m into is Vivica A. Fox. | 我感兴趣的”性感巧克力” 就只有Vivica A Fox了 |
| [11:34] | Can I talk to you for a second? | 能和你说两句吗? |
| [11:36] | Here. Okay. Okay. Okay. | –给 –好的 好的啊 |
| [11:37] | So this hot chocolate thing with Packer… | –冲热巧克力给帕克 |
| [11:39] | None of your business. | –不关你事 |
| [11:40] | Well, you know you can’t actually poison him. Right? | 你知道你不能真的毒死他的吧 是吧? |
| [11:43] | It isn’t poison. It’s a laxative. | 那不是毒药 |
| [11:45] | People take laxatives all the time. | 泻药而已 大家老吃的 |
| [11:46] | This is just a lot more of a laxative. Let me handle it. | 我只不过放了很多很多泻药而已 我来搞定吧 |
| [11:50] | I really think we should join forces on this one. | 我觉得我们这次真得联手了 |
| [11:52] | Really? What do we think? | –真的? –有啥想法? |
| [11:54] | What would drive him crazy? | 我们怎么弄疯他? |
| [11:56] | I know. Here we go. | –我知道 –来了来了 |
| [11:58] | Pepto-Bismol in his hot chocolate. | 在他的热巧克力里放止泻药 |
| [12:00] | You have got to stop | 你就别想 |
| [12:02] | with the hot chocolate stuff. | –热巧克力了 |
| [12:03] | Okay. | –好吧 |
| [12:04] | I was thinking maybe we could jam his drawers | 我在想 或许我们能卡住他的抽屉 |
| [12:06] | so they only come out two inches. | 只能打开两英寸 |
| [12:08] | Then, that way, you can see everything in them, | 这样的话 你能看到里面的所有东西 |
| [12:10] | but you can’t get at it. | 但却够不着 |
| [12:11] | Does Edgar Allan Poe know about that one? So sinister. | 埃德加艾伦坡知道这招吗? 很邪恶耶 |
| [12:15] | That wouldn’t annoy a person at all. | 这招一点都不能惹毛人 |
| [12:17] | Where do you come up with this stuff? | 你咋想的? |
| [12:18] | Okay. All right, well, this isn’t my best, but call Froggy 101, | 好吧 这个不是最好的 但 我们打去法国 101 |
| [12:22] | say that we’re the tour manager for Justin Bieber, | 说我们是贾斯汀比伯 巡回演出的经纪人 |
| [12:24] | and we’re giving away free tickets. | 我们正在派免费演唱会票 |
| [12:25] | We give them a number to call for the tickets, and it’s his number. | 我们给他们抢购热线的号码 他的电话号码 |
| [12:27] | Who is Justice Beaver? | 谁是贾斯汀海狸? |
| [12:30] | He… It’s a crime-fighting beaver. | 他 它是只警恶惩奸的海狸 |
| [12:33] | Why don’t you write up your best 40 ideas | 你为啥不把 |
| [12:36] | and e-mail them to me. Can you do that? | 你最佳的40个想法写下来呢? 然后发邮件给我可以吗? |
| [12:37] | Absolutely. I’ll e-mail you 100. | –当然 |
| [12:38] | Okay. | 我会发你100个 –好的 |
| [12:39] | Yeah. Write up your list of 100, edit it down to your top 40, | 列出100个 筛选出最佳的40个 |
| [12:43] | and I’ll read it over. | 我会仔细阅读的 |
| [12:44] | Pam, can I talk to you in private? | 帕姆 我能跟你私下聊聊吗? |
| [12:46] | I don’t know if there’s really a private place in this office. | 我不知道这办公室 是不是真有什么私人点的地方 |
| [12:48] | Well, I put a sign-up sheet in the conference room, | 我在会议室里放了个报名表 |
| [12:50] | and I signed us up for three mods. | 我给咱报了三个时段 |
| [12:52] | A mod is five minutes, and it started two minutes ago, so… | 一时段5分钟 2分钟前就开始计时了 所以 |
| [12:56] | You did that? Can we talk about this in the meeting? | 你真那么做了? 我们能在会上谈吗? |
| [12:57] | ‘Cause we’re already late. Okay. | –因为我们已经迟到了 –好吧 |
| [12:59] | Wow, when did people sign up for that? | –哇 |
| [13:00] | Mind if I close the door? | 大家什么时候报名这个了? –你介意我关门吗? |
| [13:01] | No. | 不啊 |
| [13:03] | What you did out there earlier was totally un-cool. | 你先前在那外面的行为 太不给面子了 |
| [13:06] | Well, what I was supposed to do, let you walk all over me? | 我应该怎么做让 你把我踩在脚下? |
| [13:08] | You humiliated me in front of everybody. | 你在所有人面前让我丢脸 |
| [13:11] | Okay, well, I didn’t think about it like that. | 好吧 这不是我的本意 |
| [13:14] | It’s just… I can’t do anything about it. | 我只是 我也无可奈何 |
| [13:16] | I can’t replace your computer unless that one breaks. | 除非它坏了 不然我不能给你换电脑 |
| [13:18] | Well, I mean, it’s pretty broken already. | 它都烂得差不多了 |
| [13:21] | Well, if it breaks all the way, | 如果它彻底坏了 |
| [13:24] | I can get you a new one. | 我能给你弄台新的 |
| [13:29] | Pretty sneaky, sis. | 挺鬼祟的嘛 姐姐 |
| [13:33] | Hey, cats, we got a jam session in mods six, nine and 12. | 嘿 小野猫们 我们预约了第6 9 12时段 来即兴演奏 |
| [13:41] | There are 400 of these. | 这里有400条呢 |
| [13:42] | Yeah, I couldn’t cut it down. | 是的 我筛选不了 |
| [13:44] | They’re all good. | 它们都很棒 |
| [13:45] | So good. “Number three, eat a frog.” That sounds promising. | 太棒了 第三条 吃只青蛙 这听起来很有希望哦 |
| [13:49] | “Number four, eat a dog.” | 第四条 吃条狗 |
| [13:51] | I don’t know, from a practical standpoint… | 我不知道呃 从可行性角度来看 |
| [13:54] | One thirty-five. Did you like one thirty-five? | 135条 你喜欢135条吗? |
| [13:57] | “Eat a brog.” Maybe it’s ’cause I didn’t understand it. | 吃一把曲柄手摇钻 可能因为我不明白吧 |
| [14:01] | I just had a couple of notes. Let me grab a pen and… | 我只是有几个要注释一下 让我拿支笔和 |
| [14:05] | Damn it. | 该死 |
| [14:09] | Just when we were… Just when we were getting going. | 就在我们要 就在我们要动手的时候 |
| [14:25] | Allow all cookies? Why, soitenly. | 允许所有Cookies? 当然啦 |
| [14:28] | Pop-ups? Yes, please. | 弹出式窗口? 都来吧 |
| [14:30] | Bit torrent streaming from a Somalian music website? | 用BT从索拉里的网站下音乐? |
| [14:33] | Yeah, why not? | 当然 为什么不呢? |
| [14:36] | I hope you don’t get sick, Mr. Computer. | 哦 我希望你不要生病了 电脑先生 |
| [14:39] | Why are you doing this to me, Andy? | 你为什么这么对我 安迪? |
| [14:42] | Because I hate your broke ass. | 因为我讨厌你这台破电脑 |
| [14:45] | And a 76ers fan to boot. I like that. | 另外你是76人的粉丝 我喜欢 |
| [14:48] | And you made Hank smile. | 你令汉克笑了哦 |
| [14:49] | That doesn’t happen often. You’re very charming. | 这可不常见 你很有魅力 |
| [14:52] | You know what? That is something that you should take upstairs | 你知道吗? 你应该把这幽默带到楼上去 |
| [14:55] | and use on the people that really matter. | 用在那些真正重要的人身上 |
| [14:58] | Why? I don’t know. | –为什么? –我不知道 |
| [15:00] | Holly mentioned that there were some complaints | 霍利提到 大家有点抱怨 |
| [15:03] | and that you had said some things about Kevin. | 你说了凯文点什么事儿 |
| [15:06] | Holly said that? Yeah. | –霍利说的? –是啊 |
| [15:08] | She was laughing hysterically the whole time. | 她自己一直歇斯底里地笑个不停 |
| [15:10] | I guess you said something weird about your daughter. | 我猜你还说了你女儿点什么奇怪的事儿 |
| [15:12] | She asked me, Michael. It would have been rude not to answer. | 她问我的迈克 如果不回答会很没礼貌 |
| [15:15] | You’ve been on the road a long time. | 你在外漂泊很长时间了 |
| [15:17] | And you’ve been an outdoor cat. | 你已经是只野猫了 |
| [15:19] | And now you have to be an indoor cat, | 而现在你不得不做回家猫 |
| [15:21] | so you can’t be peeing all over the walls. | 所以你不能随地尿尿了 |
| [15:23] | Michael, can I open the kimono with you? | 迈克 我能和你实话实说吗? |
| [15:27] | I’ve been on the road too long. | 我已在外漂泊太久了 |
| [15:29] | But I want to connect with my daughter. | 但我想跟我女儿显得亲近些 |
| [15:32] | And it’s not right to call her a bitch in front of strangers. | 在陌生人面前喊她三八是不对的 |
| [15:34] | No, it isn’t. | 不 是不对的 |
| [15:36] | You’re right. I got to… I got to watch my behavior. | 你说得对 我必须 我必须注意我的言行 |
| [15:38] | Yeah, a little bit. | 是的 稍稍注意下 |
| [15:41] | Don’t give up on me. | 不要放弃我 |
| [15:45] | I won’t. | 我不会的 |
| [15:48] | Okay. Everybody? I need you to see this, | 好了 大家注意 我要你们见证这个时刻 |
| [15:50] | because maybe there is somebody here | 因为可能这里有个你们低估的人 |
| [15:52] | that you underestimated who will surprise you. | 会给你们带来惊喜 |
| [15:55] | Todd Packer is going to apologize. | 托德帕克将向大家道歉 |
| [15:58] | Kevin, front and center. Come here. | 凯文 出列 过来 |
| [16:00] | I got a lot of numbers here to put together. | 我这儿还有很多数字要算呢 |
| [16:03] | Kevin, we know that you are just trying to save face. | 凯文 我们知道你只是想保住面子 |
| [16:06] | We know that you are hurt and embarrassed. | 我们知道你被伤害了 你很尴尬 |
| [16:08] | That’s silly. | 这想法真蠢 |
| [16:09] | I should be apologizing to Packer, | 我应该向帕克道歉 |
| [16:12] | ’cause everybody knows that I can dish it as good as I can take it. | 因为大家都知道 我损人的能力 和我的忍耐力一样强 |
| [16:16] | Okay, sweetie, no, you shouldn’t be apologizing to Packer. | 好了 亲爱的 不 不应该是你向帕克道歉 |
| [16:20] | That doesn’t make any sense. | 这完全说不通 |
| [16:21] | You ready for this? Are you ready for this? Mmm-hmm. | 你准备好了吗? 你也准备好了吗? |
| [16:23] | Gentlemen, start your engines. | 先生们 来吧 |
| [16:26] | I’m sorry if you were offended by my comments earlier. | 如果我之前说的话冒犯你了 我为此感到抱歉 |
| [16:29] | Well, like I said, I wasn’t offended, | 就像我说的 我没有生气· |
| [16:31] | but I’ll stand here for the big show. | –但我会站在这配合你们做大戏 |
| [16:33] | Kevin, do you accept the apology? | –凯文 你接受这个道歉吗? |
| [16:36] | Don’t do it, Kevin. That’s that fake kind of apology. | 不要接受 凯文 那是个假惺惺的道歉 |
| [16:38] | Okay, go back to the annex. | –好了 回到后面去 |
| [16:40] | This is textbook. It’s so un-cool. | –这真是典型 非常非常讨厌 |
| [16:42] | Ryan does this to me all the time, | 莱恩一直这样对我 |
| [16:44] | like it’s some offense to have feelings. | 好像有感情跟有罪似的 |
| [16:46] | Don’t do it, Kevin. | –别接受 |
| [16:47] | Sometimes you overreact. | 凯文 –有时候是你反应过度了 |
| [16:48] | Michael, how is this supposed to work? | 迈克 这有什么用? |
| [16:50] | Packer’s gonna keep saying terrible things, | 帕克还是会继续说些讨厌的话 |
| [16:52] | and then he’s just gonna make half-ass apologies, | 再敷衍地道个歉 |
| [16:54] | and we’re back to square one. | 然后我们又回到原点 |
| [16:55] | Okay. You want an apology? Here goes. | 好吧 你们想要道歉? 来啦 |
| [16:58] | Kevin, I am so sorry. | 凯文 我真的很抱歉 |
| [17:01] | You are skinny, and you’re a genius. | 你皮包骨似的 还是个天才 |
| [17:03] | Okay. That… That was maybe too much. | 这 这可能太过了 |
| [17:07] | Packer is a survivor of divorce, Stanley. | 帕克是离婚的幸存者 斯坦利 |
| [17:10] | Packer doesn’t speak with his child, Meredith. | 帕克不和他的孩子讲话 梅雷迪思 |
| [17:13] | Packer never lived up to his parents’ expectations, Andy. | 帕克一直辜负着父母的期望 安迪 |
| [17:18] | Angela loves pussycats. Packer loves… | –安吉拉喜欢小猫猫 帕克喜欢 |
| [17:21] | No, don’t. | –不 别说出来 |
| [17:22] | I was going to say “dogs!” | 我本来是想说狗的! |
| [17:24] | Okay, you know what? This is over. | 好啦 晓得不 结束了 |
| [17:25] | Apology has been issued, and we’re through with it. | 歉已经道过了 完事了 |
| [17:28] | Packer’s going to be here until the day he dies, just like the rest of us. | 帕克会呆在这儿直到他死的那天 就像我们其他人一样 |
| [17:35] | So, listen, we have to really scuff this up. | 听着 我们真的得把它给磨得破点 |
| [17:37] | No, no, no, we can say that the previous owner was a neat freak | 不 不 不 不可以 我们能说它之前的主人有洁癖 |
| [17:41] | or an elegant old lady, and she just kept it around | 或者是位优雅的老女人 随身带着它 |
| [17:43] | in case her grandkids came to visit. | 好让她的孙子来看她的时候能玩 |
| [17:45] | But they died, and they never came. I’m gonna make myself cry. | 但是孙子都死了 他们一次也没来 我都要把自己整哭了 |
| [17:49] | Andy, this is the deal we made. | 安迪 我们说好了的 |
| [17:51] | That’s probably good. That’s enough. | 这样就可以了 足够了 |
| [17:52] | We should break this hinge maybe. | 或许我们应该把这轴给弄断 |
| [17:54] | Let’s not go crazy. | 咱别疯了 |
| [17:55] | Well, thanks. Will do. | 谢谢 好的 |
| [17:56] | Absolutely. Now, when you get down there, | 绝对的 当你过来的时候 |
| [17:59] | Jo’s a little bit forgetful, | 乔有点儿健忘 |
| [18:01] | so she may have locked the gate, | 所以她可能把门锁上了 |
| [18:03] | but what you’re gonna do is, go ahead, hop it, | 但你要做的就是 直闯进去 翻一下墙 |
| [18:05] | and just head back to the pool. | 然后再朝着游泳池往回走 |
| [18:07] | That sounds weird. | 听起来真怪 |
| [18:08] | It is weird. Look at you. Perceptive. | 是有点奇怪 看看你 真敏锐 |
| [18:10] | Now I know why Jo’s kept her eye on you. | 现在我知道为啥乔那么关注你了 |
| [18:13] | And you make sure to get down there | 你去那的话 |
| [18:15] | and check out the Harry Potter World. | 一定要去哈利波特主题公园玩玩 |
| [18:17] | Whatever you want to do in your spare time is up to you. | 在你的空暇时间 想干嘛就干嘛 |
| [18:19] | Harry Potter World is supposed to be fantastic. | 哈利波特主题公园应该会很好玩的 |
| [18:22] | Apparently, as soon as corporate found out | 显然 |
| [18:24] | I wanted to come in off the road, | 当公司一发现 我想回归的时候 |
| [18:26] | Jo offered me a cushy new job in Tallahassee. | 乔就在塔拉哈希 给我安排了一份轻松又赚钱的新工作 |
| [18:29] | And here’s the best part. | 最棒的是这个 |
| [18:30] | I’m a huge alligator nerd. | 我是个鳄鱼控 |
| [18:33] | I can name you every genus, every subspecies. | 我能说出所有属 所有亚种的名字 |
| [18:37] | Also, I’m a huge boob nerd. | 而且 我还是大胸控 |
| [18:39] | Check it out and have a free Butterbeer on us. | 去逛逛 喝点黄油啤酒 咱帮你买单 |
| [18:41] | Keep the receipt, and we’ll get you back. | –发票留着 |
| [18:43] | What are you doing? | 我们给你报销 –你们在干啥? |
| [18:44] | This is a very important client. | –嘘 这是个很重要的客户 |
| [18:45] | All right, so just pack your bags. | –好啦 快点收拾行李吧 |
| [18:47] | And be sure to bring those swimming trunks. | 千万记得要带泳裤啊 |
| [18:49] | Bye, now. Bye. | –再见 –拜拜 |
| [18:50] | I cannot believe this. You’re sending Packer to Florida? Why? | 我真不敢相信 你们要把帕克送到佛罗里达? 为什么? |
| [18:54] | Because he’s a jerk. You gave him my desk. | –他是个混蛋 –你把我桌子给他了 |
| [18:56] | Okay. So you’re tricking him into flying to Florida. | 好吧 那么你们就骗他飞去佛罗里达 |
| [18:59] | This wasn’t my first choice. Jim had so many better ideas. | 这不是我的首选 吉姆还有很多更棒的点子 |
| [19:01] | You have to tell him. You have to tell him what you did. | 你们得告诉他 你们得告诉他你们都干了些啥 |
| [19:03] | No, no, no, no, no, no. That is not in the plan. | 不 不 不 不 不 不 这不包括在我们的计划里 |
| [19:06] | That is actually anti what we’re doing. | 这和我们的行动相对抗 |
| [19:07] | He is my oldest friend. I am going to tell him. | 他是我的老哥们儿 我要去告诉他 |
| [19:09] | Wait. Why don’t we come up with a plan that we’re all happy about? | 等等 为什么我们不想个皆大欢喜的计划? |
| [19:12] | Yeah, that… | 对啊 那. |
| [19:13] | Pam, how is this thing even any better than my old computer? | 帕姆 这玩意儿有哪一点 比得上我的旧电脑啊? |
| [19:17] | Come on, Andy. I mean, you said you wanted a computer. | 拜托 安迪 你说你要部电脑的 |
| [19:20] | This is the best I could do. | 我尽了全力了 |
| [19:21] | Where’d you even find this thing? | 你是在哪淘来的这玩意儿的 |
| [19:23] | Like, in the corner of the warehouse? | 仓库的某个角落? |
| [19:24] | Yes, I found it on a shelf in the corner of the warehouse. | 是的 我在仓库角落的一个架子上找到的 |
| [19:28] | All right, well, thank you for my garbage computer. | 好吧 谢谢你给了部垃圾电脑我 |
| [19:38] | You’re looking at the new face of corporate. | 你眼前的是公司的全新面貌 |
| [19:40] | Gonna put the “ass” in Tallahassee. | 俺要挪窝去塔拉哈西了 |
| [19:43] | Yes, about that… | 是的 关于这个 |
| [19:44] | Man, we got to go out and celebrate tonight. | 老兄 今晚咱可要出去庆祝一番 |
| [19:46] | Well, I don’t know if that’s a good idea. | 额 我不知道那是不是个好主意 |
| [19:48] | The old ball and chain? | –在担心你的管家婆? –不 |
| [19:50] | No. No. Nothing like that at all. | 没有 完全没有 |
| [19:52] | Listen, I’m gonna tell you something | 听着 我跟你说点事儿 |
| [19:54] | that none of these people have the stones to tell you. | 这些人没人敢跟你说 |
| [19:56] | It’s your girlfriend. | 关于你的女友的 |
| [19:58] | She’s uptight. | 她很暴躁 |
| [20:00] | Sorry? | –什么? |
| [20:02] | I know this stuff can hurt, | –我知道这种事很能伤人 |
| [20:03] | but I wish someone had said something to me about my ex-wife. | 但我希望当初有人能提醒我 让我看清我的前妻 |
| [20:05] | All I’m saying is, in about a month or so, have you down to Florida, | 我要说的是 大概过一个月左右 你去佛罗里达 |
| [20:08] | introduce you to all the local talent. | 我就给你介绍一些当地的美人儿 |
| [20:15] | Sounds great. | 听起来很好啊 |
| [20:17] | Yeah. It’s gonna be so good. | –是的 –一定会很棒了 |
| [20:18] | That is. It’s gonna be awesome. | 的确 一定会很棒 |
| [20:19] | I think you’re really going to enjoy it down there. | 我觉得你在那儿一定会很尽兴 |
| [20:26] | I’m sorry about your friend. | 你朋友的事 我很抱歉 |
| [20:28] | No. He’s an ass. | 不用 他是个混蛋 |
| [20:31] | You are. | 你才是 |
| [20:34] | You are. | 你才是呢 |
| [20:36] | What are you, wicked smaht? | 你是什么 小聪明? |
| [20:39] | No, you are. | 不 |
| [20:41] | Hoo-ah! Hoo-ah! | 你才是呢 |
| [20:51] | Saw Andy’s new computer you found in the warehouse. | 看了你在仓库里找到的那部 安迪的新电脑了 |
| [20:54] | Yep. Lucked out. | –是啊 狗屎运 |
| [20:55] | Yeah, you really did, | –是啊 你真幸运 |
| [20:56] | ’cause I know every inch of that warehouse. | 因为我对那个仓库可是了如指掌 |
| [21:00] | Yep. Super lucky. | 是啊 特走运 |
| [21:01] | Maybe you could go back down there | 或许你再回仓库瞅瞅 |
| [21:03] | and see if you can find me some extra sick days. | 看看能不能帮我找到多余的病假日 |
| [21:12] | Yeah. | 好吧 |
| [21:15] | You know what? I think I saw one sick day. | 你知道吗 我想我看到了一天的病假 |
| [21:20] | I think maybe I saw five. | –我看到的好像是五天 |
| [21:21] | Three. | –三天 |
| [21:26] | I’m full-on corrupt. | 我真是太腐败了 |