| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:03] | Smith has the ball. He’s looking to pass it. | Smith持球 等待机会出手 |
| [00:05] | Gives it to Anthony. Anthony may drive. | 传给了甜瓜 甜瓜想上篮 |
| [00:07] | No, he kicks it off to Novak for the three. | 不 妙传给了小前 3分球 |
| [00:09] | And it’s good. | 漂亮 |
| [00:14] | Bam. | 嘣 |
| [00:15] | Yeah. | 耶 |
| [00:17] | Nick, I got a serious parenting dilemma. | Nick 我在任重道远的育儿路上陷入了困境 |
| [00:19] | Talk to me. | 我来解救你 |
| [00:20] | Hey, hey, hold on. | 嘿 嘿 打住 |
| [00:22] | Why do you only ever ask Nick to solve your parenting dilemmas? | 你怎么总是向Nick请教育儿困惑 |
| [00:25] | He’s got two kids. | 他才俩孩子 |
| [00:26] | I’ve got, like, four. | 我有 差不多 4个 |
| [00:29] | “Like, four.” Yes, why wouldn’t I seek your counsel? | 差不多4个 就是啊 我咋就不问你呢 |
| [00:32] | It’s hard to keep track, man. | 别那么较真儿 哥们儿 |
| [00:33] | I haven’t slept in six years. | 人家6年没睡觉了 |
| [00:35] | I’m tired. | 好累呢 |
| [00:36] | This morning, I tried to put a shirt on my legs for five minutes. | 今早 我花了5分钟把衣服往腿上套 |
| [00:41] | I love you, kids, but you’re making daddy stupid. | 我爱你 孩子们 但你们让老爹越来越蠢了 |
| [00:46] | What’s your dilemma, Chris? | 你困惑啥呢 Chris |
| [00:47] | Well, it’s time to feed Ernie, and at this stagein his development, | 好吧 Ernie要用膳了 在他这个阶段 |
| [00:50] | he needs to drink whole milk, | 他要喝全脂奶 |
| [00:51] | but the bar only has 2%. | 但酒吧只有低脂奶 |
| [00:54] | What do I do? | 我要怎么办 |
| [00:56] | You know what a dilemma is, right, Chris? | 你知道什么叫困境的 对吧 Chris |
| [00:57] | A dilemma is having to decide which of your rugby teammates you’re gonna eat to stay alive. | 为了活命 非得从橄榄球队里选一哥儿们吞了 那才叫困境 |
| [01:03] | Look, I just don’t want to screw up. | 好吧 我只不过想做个好爸爸 |
| [01:05] | – Sheila already doesn’t trust me. – Stop. Stop. Okay? | – Sheila本来就不信任我 – 打住 打住 好吗 |
| [01:08] | Sheila doesn’t get to play into this. | 这可没Sheila什么事儿 |
| [01:10] | You guys are divorced. | 你俩都离婚了 |
| [01:11] | Ernie is your kid too. | Ernie也是你的孩子 |
| [01:12] | You need to stand up to her. | 为了孩子 该出手时就出手 |
| [01:13] | Yeah. Your kid was wearing a beret the other day. | 就是 你儿子有天带了个贝雷帽 |
| [01:16] | That’s not right. | 开国际玩笑吧 |
| [01:18] | I know. I try to stand up to her, but it’s pointless. | 我懂 我也想奋勇顽强一次 但根本没用 |
| [01:20] | I can’t win, ’cause she just says, | 赢不了的 她一说 |
| [01:22] | “He grew inside me,” | 他是我生的 |
| [01:23] | and boom, argument’s over, | 嘭的一声 我被秒杀 |
| [01:25] | Ernie can’t watch Goodfellas with me. | Ernie就不能跟我一起看好家伙了(90年黑帮电影) |
| [01:27] | You talking to me? | 你在跟我说话吗 |
| [01:28] | You talking to me, goodfellas? | 是跟我说话吗 好家伙 |
| [01:31] | I don’t know what you’re doing. | 完全听不懂你在讲啥 |
| [01:32] | That’s not a line from anything. | 不是电影台词吧 |
| [01:34] | Oh, my God. Your baby’s adorable. | 哦 天哪 你小孩也太萌了吧 |
| [01:38] | Thank you. Yeah. | 谢谢 我也觉得 |
| [01:41] | – What’s wrong with him? – Hey. | – 他有毛病吗 – 嘿 |
| [01:43] | Excuse me, excuse me. Hi. | 抱歉 打扰了 你好 |
| [01:45] | I’m sorry. My friend here’s a little rusty. | 不好意思 我朋友他久别情场有些生疏 |
| [01:47] | And I think what he meant to say was, | 我想他真正的意思其实是 |
| [01:49] | “Thank you. My name is Chris. | 多谢 我叫Chris |
| [01:51] | “I am single, I’m a lawyer, | 单身贵族 律师一名 |
| [01:52] | “And although I feel | 虽然我觉得 |
| [01:54] | that stationery is an appropriate gift”To give to a close friend, | 送好友文具作为礼物最适合 |
| [01:57] | I’m a pretty cool guy, and I’d love to buy you a drink.” | 但其实 我是朵相当不错的男子 以及 我能请你喝杯酒么 |
| [02:00] | That is what you meant to say, right, Chris? | 你想说的 是这个意思吧 Chris |
| [02:01] | Yes. That is what I meant to say. | 正是 在下正是这个意思 |
| [02:03] | And stationery is a timeless gift. | 还有 文具恒久远 一个永流传 |
| [02:07] | Can we buy you a drink? | 我们能请你喝杯酒吗 |
| [02:09] | Sure. Why not? | 当然 可以啊 |
| [02:11] | Oh, how could I say no to that face? | 哦 我要如何拒绝你呢 小萌神 |
| [02:18] | Okay. Smell check. | 好的 气味检验 |
| [02:21] | Yeah, we’re good. | 没问题 好着呢 |
| [02:53] | Megan invited me to the Knicks game. | Megan请我去看尼克斯队的比赛 |
| [02:55] | Ooh, boom. | 哇 击个掌 |
| [02:57] | Boom. | 俺也来一下 |
| [03:00] | Nicely done, little wingman. | 干得不错呀 小帮手 |
| [03:02] | – Way to hook your dad up. – Yeah. | – 帮你爹成功把到妹了 – 就是啊 |
| [03:03] | That was my job in college. | 以前上学时那可都是我的专职工作 |
| [03:05] | And like you I often had puke on my shirt. | 跟你一样 我也常常吐自己一身 |
| [03:07] | Huh? | 哈 |
| [03:08] | Wait, wait, wait, | 慢着 慢着 |
| [03:10] | I can’t go to the game with Megan. | 我不能跟Megan去看比赛 |
| [03:11] | I have Ernie till Monday this week. | 我要照顾Ernie到周一呢 |
| [03:12] | Hey, figure it out. | 嘿 想办法呀 |
| [03:14] | You have a chance to go to the Knicks game with a beautiful woman. | 你有机会能跟美女去看尼克斯的比赛哎 |
| [03:18] | I’m a stay-at-home dad with four kids. | 我可是要在家带孩子 4个噢 |
| [03:20] | You know what I do every day? | 你知道我每天都怎么过的吗 |
| [03:22] | I stay at home with four kids | 在家带孩子 4个! |
| [03:25] | while Marny gets to go to work, | Marny去上班了 |
| [03:27] | and Clark, he broke our TV. | Clark 把电视给砸了 |
| [03:28] | Do you have any idea how desperate my situation is? Look at me. | 你能体会我的痛苦绝望吗 看着我 |
| [03:31] | Look what you’ve done to me! | 看看你对我做了些什么 |
| [03:32] | I’m all riled up! | 我很愤怒 |
| [03:37] | Just get Sheila to watch him. | 叫Sheila带孩子 |
| [03:38] | No. No way. | 别 想都别想 |
| [03:39] | If I tell Sheila I have a date– | 要是Sheila知道我去约会 |
| [03:41] | Stop. Stop. | 打住 打住 |
| [03:42] | She does not get to tell you what to do any more. | 你已经不用听她的话了 |
| [03:44] | We do. | 听哥们的 |
| [03:47] | And you’re going. | 叫你去你就去 |
| [03:48] | Look, Chris, this is why you moved into our building. | 听着 Chris 这就是为啥叫你搬来跟我们一起住的原因 |
| [03:51] | So we could look after you | 我们能照顾你 |
| [03:53] | and play with your life. | 还能好好操控你的小日子 |
| [04:00] | Hi, Ernie. | 你好啊 Ernie |
| [04:01] | Sheila, how did you get in my apartment? | Sheila 你怎么在我家 |
| [04:04] | I had a key made. | 我有备用钥匙 |
| [04:06] | Did you hear that, Chris? | 听到了吗 Chris |
| [04:07] | Your ex-wife had a key made to your apartment. | 你前妻有你家的备用钥匙 |
| [04:09] | Fun. Normal. | 真好玩 真是一点都”不奇怪”哟 |
| [04:12] | What are you doing here? | 你来干嘛 |
| [04:14] | Well, I’m here to make sure that your apartment is safe for our son. | 哦 我来确保你家对我们的儿子没有生命威胁 |
| [04:16] | Now I see that you’ve painted. | 我看到你已经刷过墙了 |
| [04:18] | Is it lead-free? | 颜料是不含铅的吧 |
| [04:19] | No, it’s lead-only. | 不 是只含铅的 |
| [04:20] | I ordered it from the ’50s. | 我从上世纪50年代订来的 |
| [04:22] | Oh, I don’t miss that. | 哦 这臭脾气我可是一点也不怀念 |
| [04:25] | And did you see the abandoned well that we dug in the bathroom? | 你看到我们在浴室挖的荒井了没 |
| [04:32] | Oh, I don’t miss you. | 哦 我更加不怀念你 |
| [04:36] | Oh, hey, would you mind watching Ernie | 哦 嘿 你明天可以照看一下儿子吗 |
| [04:38] | – for a bit tomorrow? – Why? | – 就明天 – 为啥 |
| [04:40] | I have a date. | 我要去 约会 |
| [04:42] | A date. | 约会啊 |
| [04:43] | – Yes. – Then no. | – 对 – 那没空 |
| [04:46] | Right. Right, ’cause, God forbid | 是啊当然 因为上帝不准我去 |
| [04:48] | I actually move on with my life– | 我终于重新开始新生活了 |
| [04:50] | Or is it maybe that I have a date myself, Chris? | 或者还有一种可能 我明天也有约会 Chris |
| [04:54] | – You have a date? – Yes, I do. | – 你也有约会 -是的 我有 |
| [04:56] | With, like, a man? | 跟 呃 一个男性 |
| [04:58] | Okay. Go away, Nick. | 边上凉快去 Nick |
| [05:00] | – Good-bye, Nick. – Bye, Sheila. | – 再见 Nick – 再见 Sheila |
| [05:02] | This is the scary lady I was telling you about. | 她就是我跟你说过的怪阿姨 |
| [05:07] | Come on, you don’t really have a date. | 别闹了 你才没有约会呢 |
| [05:08] | You’re just jealous that I have one. | 你只是羡慕嫉妒恨而已 |
| [05:10] | No, I do, Chris. | 不 我真的有约 Chris |
| [05:12] | I have a date with a very tall and attractive man no less, | 我约了个高富帅 不止 |
| [05:15] | a very tall and attractive professional athlete man. | 高富帅职业运动员 |
| [05:19] | Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. | Kareem Abdul-Jabbar(贾巴尔 NBA传奇人物) |
| [05:23] | You have a date with Kareem Abdul-Jabbar? | 你约了Kareem Abdul-Jabbar |
| [05:26] | – Yes. – How’d you meet? | – 是呀 – 你们怎么认识的 |
| [05:29] | J-Date. | 相亲网站 |
| [05:31] | Okay, fine, fine, don’t help. | 好的 很好很强大 你不帮忙是吧 |
| [05:33] | – I’ll just get a babysitter. – No, no, no, no. | – 不帮忙我就去找保姆 – 不要 不要 不要 |
| [05:35] | Chris, no babysitters. We’ve talked about this. | Chris 不准找保姆 我们说好的 |
| [05:38] | They just throw your kid in front of a TV | 保姆只会把你孩子往电视前面一丢 |
| [05:40] | and talk on their phone while drinking your wine | 自己跑去一边 喝你的美酒 煲她的电话粥 |
| [05:42] | and making bathtub meth with your cold medicine. | 还 用你的感冒药自己做浴盐吃呢(某种致幻剂毒品) |
| [05:45] | – Sheila, look, I’m sure– – Chris, he grew inside me. | – Sheila 听着 我保证 – Chris 他是我生的 |
| [05:50] | Fine. You win again. | 好吧 你又赢了 |
| [05:53] | Thank you. Okay. Hi, Ernie. | 谢了 好的 嗨 Ernie |
| [05:56] | Oh. I will see you on Monday. | 哦 我们周一再见哦 |
| [05:58] | Okay? Be good. | 好么 乖乖地 |
| [06:01] | – Okay, here you go. – Hi, buddy. | – 好了 给你抱 – 嗨 小家伙 |
| [06:02] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [06:05] | Ernie Ernie, | |
| [06:07] | I am getting you a babysitter. | 我这就去给你找保姆 |
| [06:09] | And Mommy is gonna like it | 妈咪不会有意见的 |
| [06:11] | because she’s not gonna know about it. | 因为妈咪是不会知道滴 |
| [06:20] | Hello. | 有人在吗 |
| [06:21] | Come in. | 进来吧 |
| [06:22] | Hey, guys. | 嘿 伙计们 |
| [06:23] | Glad I caught you at home. | 你在家就好 |
| [06:26] | I’m always at home. | 我一直都在家啊 |
| [06:28] | Right, so can I get the name of your babysitter? | 好的 你们保姆叫什么名字啊 |
| [06:32] | Babysitter? | 保姆 |
| [06:33] | Yeah, you know, someone you pay to come over | 是啊 你懂的 你付钱给人家帮你带孩子 |
| [06:36] | and watch your kids while you have fun. | 这样你就能出去风流快活了 |
| [06:38] | Fun? | 快活 |
| [06:39] | Oh, yeah, you remember fun. | 哦 是啊 你记得啥是快活吗 |
| [06:41] | That thing we used to have before all this magic | 就是在咱生活没变成像现在这么猎奇之前 |
| [06:44] | came into our lives. | 常干的事儿 |
| [06:46] | So just the name of your babysitter. | 我只要保姆的名字就好 |
| [06:49] | Do you really think we have the disposable income | 你不会真的觉得我们有闲钱 |
| [06:52] | to pay people to watch these kids? | 请人带孩子吧 |
| [06:53] | There are four of them. | 咱有4个娃呢 |
| [06:56] | They have bled us dry. | 他们都快把我们榨干了 |
| [06:59] | They broke the TV, man. | 他们把电视都砸了 先森 |
| [07:03] | We have nothing. | 我们是矮肥穷 |
| [07:09] | That means you have nothing too. | 意味着你们也别想高帅富 |
| [07:17] | Mommy! | 妈咪 |
| [07:18] | Hey, how was the princess party? | 嘿 小公主聚会好玩吗 |
| [07:20] | Fun. | 好玩呀 |
| [07:22] | Daddy, chase me. | 爹地 来追我 |
| [07:23] | Okay. Here I come. | 好的 我来了哦 |
| [07:26] | I’m chasing you. | 我正在奋起直追呢 |
| [07:29] | Oh, remember, we have that ridiculous fundraiser | 哦 记得吗 明晚我们要去Violet的学校 |
| [07:32] | at Violet’s school tomorrow night. | 参加那个可笑的筹款晚宴 |
| [07:34] | Oh, no. | 哦 别啊 |
| [07:37] | What’s the theme this year? | 今年什么主题 |
| [07:38] | “Set sail for a night of fun and dancing aboard the ship of dreams– | 让梦之船载着欢愉的舞步扬帆远航吧 |
| [07:43] | the Titanic.” | 泰坦尼克号 |
| [07:44] | And what happens at the end of the night? | 哦 最后怎么样了来着 |
| [07:46] | You hog a piece of driftwood | 你独霸浮木(wood亦有兴奋状态下的JJ之意) |
| [07:48] | that could easily accommodate the both of us? | 它本来可以让我们俩都舒舒服服挤一挤的 |
| [07:55] | Hey, Ernie. | 嘿 Ernie |
| [07:57] | I hear you have a hot date tomorrow night. | 听说你明晚约的女孩很辣哦 |
| [08:00] | – I do. – Ooh. | – 必须的 – 哦 |
| [08:01] | I hope she’s condescending like Sheila | 真希望她跟Sheila一样高高在上 |
| [08:03] | ’cause I miss feeling badly about my clothes and education. | 好怀念她鄙视我的衣服和学历的感觉 |
| [08:07] | – All right. – I went to Colgate. | – 好的 – 我可是高露洁毕业的呢 |
| [08:09] | That is a good school. | 那学校可好了呢 |
| [08:10] | She can’t hurt us here. Okay? | 她不会再伤害你了 别怕 |
| [08:14] | Megan seems great, but Sheila won’t watch Ernie, | Megan是个好女孩儿 但Sheila不愿意带孩子 |
| [08:16] | so I need a babysitter. | 我得找个保姆 |
| [08:18] | Sheila’s cool with you getting a sitter? | Sheila准许你找保姆 |
| [08:19] | No, couldn’t be less cool with it. | 不 死都不准许啊 |
| [08:21] | Going behind her back. | 背着她找的 |
| [08:22] | Oh, have Carleen watch him. | 哦 带孩子 找Carleen啊 |
| [08:23] | Babies love her. | 孩子们超爱她 |
| [08:24] | She’s got big, squishy grandma boobs. | 她那巨大湿软下垂的胸器 |
| [08:27] | Yeah. Kids sink into ’em like they’re made out of Nerf. | 对头 娃们埋在那胸器里就跟橡胶玩具一样 |
| [08:30] | Perfect. | 棒呆了 |
| [08:32] | So what are you gonna wear on your date? | 你打算穿什么去 |
| [08:33] | Uh… I was thinking this. | 呃 穿这个 |
| [08:35] | No. No. Okay, I’m gonna take you shopping tomorrow, | 别 千万别 好吧 明天我带你去血拼 |
| [08:38] | unless you’re gonna take her out to a Christian rock concert. | 除非你想带她去看基督摇滚音乐会(摇滚分支 含大量福音音乐特性) |
| [08:50] | Can I help you gentlemen find anything? | 需要效劳么 |
| [08:52] | Yeah, hi, | 是的 嗨 |
| [08:53] | my friend here is recently divorced, | 我朋友最近刚离婚 |
| [08:55] | and he’s got a hot date in a few hours, | 过几个小时 他佳人有约 |
| [08:57] | and he needs to look… | 他得要打扮的 |
| [09:00] | Better than this. | 反正比现在这身好看 |
| [09:03] | Yes, I understand. I’ll pull a few things. | 我懂的 我去帮你想想办法 |
| [09:07] | Guys, I’m really glad you pushed me. | 好哥们儿 真谢谢你们推了我一把 |
| [09:09] | I’m getting a sitter. I’m going on a date. | 我找了保姆 我约了美女 |
| [09:11] | This is big. I feel like I’m moving on with my life. | 这事意义重大 我觉得我又重新开始生活了 |
| [09:14] | Clarky Clarky. | |
| [09:16] | Don’t you put that in your underwear. | 那不能放在内裤里 |
| [09:18] | Don’t. | 不可以 |
| [09:20] | Well, looks like I’m buying a tie. | 好吧 看来我要买那条领带了 |
| [09:22] | Wait. No, what? | 等等 别啊 什么 |
| [09:26] | Your sitter just cancelled on me. | 你的保姆刚刚和我说不干了 |
| [09:27] | Tip off’s in, like, two hours. What am I gonna do? | 就剩俩小时了才说现在不干 我怎么办 |
| [09:30] | Okay. All right. We’re not gonna panic, right? | 别怕 没事 我们才不要慌张呢 对吧 |
| [09:32] | We’re gonna figure this out. | 我们会找到办法的 |
| [09:33] | We are the same two guys who figured out | 没衣服没护照 咱在Cancun(墨西哥城市) |
| [09:34] | how to get back from Cancun with no clothes and no passports. | 不也照样想办法回来了么 |
| [09:38] | – We called your mom. – Yeah. | – 我们打给你妈求救的 -是啊 |
| [09:40] | And if necessary, we will call her again. | 有必要的话 就再打给她咯 |
| [09:44] | Forget it. It’s a sign. | 别麻烦了 这是个预兆 |
| [09:46] | I’m not supposed to go on this date. | 我本来就不该去这次约会的 |
| [09:47] | Sheila didn’t want me getting a sitter anyway. | 再说Sheila也不想我找保姆来着 |
| [09:49] | Hey, hey, you are not gonna bail. | 嘿 嘿 不许你临阵脱逃 |
| [09:51] | I will watch Ernie. You are going on your date. | 我给你照看孩子 你去约你的会 |
| [09:53] | All right. That’s settled. | 很好 就这么定了 |
| [09:56] | Clarky Clarky. | |
| [09:58] | That’s a shoehorn, buddy. | 那是鞋拔子 小哥 |
| [09:59] | That doesn’t go there. | 不是那么用的 |
| [10:10] | Ernie, are you ready to tap dance on the edge of insanity? | Ernie 准备好在疯狂的边缘激情踢踏了吗 |
| [10:14] | Huh? | 哈 |
| [10:15] | Hey, Ernie. | 嘿 Ernie |
| [10:17] | Is Chris here? | Chris来了吗 |
| [10:19] | No, Carleen cancelled on him, | 不是 Carleen放他鸽子 |
| [10:20] | so I am gonna take care– | 所以 我帮他带孩子 |
| [10:23] | wow. | 哇 |
| [10:25] | You look… | 你看起来像是… |
| [10:27] | Like you are going somewhere. | 像是要出去见人似的 |
| [10:30] | Nick, we have Violet’s school thing. | Nick 我们要去Violet学校的晚宴啊 |
| [10:33] | I was under the impression you did not want to go to that. | 我怎么记得你不想去的啊 |
| [10:35] | – I was looking forward to it. – You said it seemed ridiculous. | -人家明明很期待的 -你说晚宴很可笑的 |
| [10:39] | – That’s not the point. – What is the point? | -这不是重点 -那啥是重点 |
| [10:41] | Do you need me to explain what the point is? | 你真的要我给你解释啥是重点 |
| [10:45] | Maybe just this one time. | 要不就解释…这一次吧 |
| [10:48] | Okay, | 好吧 |
| [10:51] | I know how to make this better. | 我知道该怎么办才好 |
| [10:52] | I do. | 我真知道 |
| [10:54] | Do you want to watch our wedding video? | 你想看我们的婚礼录影吗 |
| [10:56] | ‘Cause I’m almost done editing that. | 我就快剪辑好了 |
| [11:00] | Oh, my God. | 哦 天哪 |
| [11:03] | Emily Emily! | |
| [11:05] | Don’t judge me. | 没你说话的份儿 |
| [11:07] | How many relationships have you made work? | 你才谈过几次成功的恋爱 |
| [11:09] | Huh? Yeah? | 恩 是吧 |
| [11:11] | Nick just doesn’t get it. | Nick就是不懂 |
| [11:12] | He goes off to work, and I am with the kids all day. | 他出去工作了 可我却要在家带孩子 一整天呐 |
| [11:17] | Believe me, | 我懂的 |
| [11:18] | I know, and then, when you do finally wind them down, | 我懂 而且 你终于把孩子都安顿好了 |
| [11:21] | they come back in and wind them right back up | 他们一回来 又给你搅和乱了 |
| [11:24] | and then have to take an “Emergency” Call from work. | 还老是接到”紧急的工作电话” |
| [11:26] | Just when it’s bath time. | 净挑该他们给孩子洗澡的时候打 |
| [11:28] | Just when it’s bath time. | 就是! 就挑那该死的时间来电话 |
| [11:30] | Oh, yes, I’m horrible. | 哦 是啊 我真是大恶人 |
| [11:34] | I always tell you, | 我一直都说 |
| [11:35] | staying home with the kids is the hardest job in the world. | 在家带孩子才是这世上最辛苦的工作 |
| [11:39] | And I love it. | 我爱我的孩子 |
| [11:40] | But tonight I wanted to board the lame Titanic | 但今晚人家还是想登上那弱爆的泰坦尼克号 |
| [11:43] | and wear these awesome elbow gloves | 带着这么”漂亮”的长手套然后扬帆起航啊 |
| [11:46] | and eat something other than dinosaur chicken nuggets. | 只要不再叫我吃恐龙形状的麦乐鸡 吃什么都行 |
| [11:50] | Ooh, but how good are those? | 唔 可是它们的确很好吃不是么 |
| [11:55] | He just doesn’t understand what my life is like. | 他就是不懂我的生活到底是什么样子的 |
| [11:58] | I get it. | 我懂啊 |
| [11:59] | You know, I see it with Gary. | 你知道么 这点我是从Gary那里弄明白的 |
| [12:01] | How this man does it, I don’t know. | 他是怎么做到的 我不知道 |
| [12:04] | He is a saint. | 但他就是个圣人 |
| [12:05] | Mm-hmm. | 嗯哼 |
| [12:07] | And once in a while he needs a break. | 三不五时的 圣人也需要休息休息 |
| [12:11] | – That’s right. – And so do you. | – 就是嘛 – 你也一样啊 |
| [12:15] | You’re dressed up to go out, so I’m taking you out. | 你打扮得美美的就要出去玩玩 我这就带你出去遛遛 |
| [12:18] | – What? – Get up. Let’s go. | – 啥 – 起来 说走咱就走 |
| [12:20] | Marny, you’re a life saver. | Marny 你真是我的救星 |
| [12:23] | – Bye, Gary. – What? | – 再见了 Gary – 你们这就走了 |
| [12:26] | Yoda, pick up the chips, man. | Yoda 把薯片捡起来 |
| [12:28] | Boy, if I had on the– | 孩子们 要是我 |
| [12:36] | Okay, kids, my wife may not be taking my phone calls, | 好吧 孩子们 我老婆也许不愿接我电话 |
| [12:40] | but I refuse to let that ruin your good time. | 但我拒绝让这事毁掉你们的美好时光 |
| [12:42] | And so, Freddie, welcome to the octagon! | 好嘞 Freddie 欢迎来到无限制格斗场 |
| [12:47] | Yes, you wil fightl– | 是的 你将会揍死…. |
| [12:50] | We don’t like the octagon! | 好吧我们不想玩暴力格斗 |
| [12:53] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [12:55] | Because of you, I just got stuck in my apartment on a Sunday with all four kids. | 就因为你 我大周末的得困在家里带孩子 4个啊 |
| [13:00] | – How’s that my fault? – Because my wife | – 干我屁事啊 – 因为我老婆 |
| [13:02] | and your wife– does that TV work? | 和你老婆 这电视机管用不 |
| [13:06] | Oh, my God, we– we’re saved. | 哦 天哪 我们得救了 |
| [13:09] | Clark, Yoda, come for a prayer. | Clark Yoda 快来祈祷 |
| [13:16] | I keep it at my parents’ house. | 我把它留在我父母家了 |
| [13:18] | Wow. I’ve never gone on a date with a girl who’s caught a marlin. | 我还没跟抓过马林鱼的女孩儿交往过呢 |
| [13:22] | Clearly that is what your mistake has been. | 明白自己以前错在哪儿了吧 |
| [13:27] | Uh, it’s my ex-wife. | 呃 是我前妻 |
| [13:30] | You’re not gonna pick that up, right? | 你不会想接电话吧 |
| [13:34] | Go ahead. I don’t mind. | 接吧 我不介意 |
| [13:35] | Hi, Sheila. What’s up? | 嗨 Sheila 有事吗 |
| [13:37] | Chris. You weren’t answering your phone. | Chris 干嘛不接我电话 |
| [13:39] | I’m a little worried about Ernie. | 我有点担心Ernie |
| [13:40] | – Oh, he’s fine. – Let’s go, Knicks! | – 哦 他很好 – 上啊 尼克斯队 |
| [13:42] | Who is that? | 谁在说话 |
| [13:44] | Are you at the Knicks game? | 你不会是去看尼克斯队的球赛了吧 |
| [13:46] | I said no babysitters. | 我都说了不准找保姆 |
| [13:49] | – Who is watching Ernie? – Me. I am. | – 谁在照看孩子 – 我 我呀 |
| [13:51] | So, if I go over to your apartment right now, | 所以 我要是现在去你家 |
| [13:53] | – you’ll be there? – What’s she saying? | – 你会在家吗 – 她在说啥 |
| [13:54] | Yeah. Yeah, at home. | 是 是的 就在家 |
| [13:57] | Where else would I be? | 不然能在哪 |
| [13:58] | All right. | 好的 |
| [13:59] | We’ll see. | 咱走着瞧 |
| [14:01] | Everything okay? | 没事吧 |
| [14:03] | Yeah, I just need to make a quick call. | 没事 但我要打个紧急电话 |
| [14:05] | I came to dance, dance, dance, dance (Taio Cruz – Dynamite) | ♪大爷就是来跳跳跳舞的♪(歌词要翻译嘛?) |
| [14:11] | Granted, the school function sounded like a stupid event, | 诚然 学校基金晚宴听起来好弱智啊 |
| [14:14] | but that’s not the point. | 但这不是重点 |
| [14:16] | See, that’s exactly what she said. | 就是啊 我就是这么跟她说的 |
| [14:17] | What is the point? | 啥才是重点呢 |
| [14:19] | The point, my tall, idiotic friend, | 重点是啥 我光长个儿不长脑的好盆与哟 |
| [14:21] | is that she doesn’t care about the event. | 重点是她才不关心什么晚宴 |
| [14:23] | She wants a night out. | 她就是想出去玩一晚 |
| [14:25] | Dinner, dancing, | 吃个晚餐 跳个舞什么的 |
| [14:27] | her man dressed in a suit. | 和她身着西装的男人 |
| [14:29] | Adult stuff. | 成年人爱玩的那套 |
| [14:31] | You’re right. I’m an idiot. | 你说得对 是我不长脑子 |
| [14:32] | Yeah, that’s what I’ve been saying. | 就是嘛 我一直都这么说的 |
| [14:35] | We gonna rock this club, we gonna go all night | ♪我们要嗨翻全场 要彻夜不眠♪ |
| [14:38] | Nick, where are you? | Nick 你在哪儿啊 |
| [14:40] | Sheila is on her way over. | Sheila已经在去我家的路上了 |
| [14:42] | She has a key. Bolt the door. | 她有钥匙的 快把门插上 |
| [14:45] | Why isn’t he answering? | 他干嘛不接我电话 |
| [14:46] | What if something happened to Ernie? | 我儿子不会出什么意外了吧 |
| [14:48] | I’m sure everything’s fine. | 我相信不会有事的 |
| [14:50] | Maybe. You hear stories. | 很难说哦 你也知道世道险恶 |
| [14:53] | Megan, I’m so sorry. | Megan 真是太抱歉了 |
| [14:55] | I got to go. | 我得走了 |
| [14:57] | Halvsies on some nachos? | 玉米片的钱平摊的吧 |
| [15:00] | Who are you? | 你妈贵姓 |
| [15:11] | Wow. You’re right. | 哇 你是个天才 |
| [15:12] | This is so much easier than a bathtub. | 这比在浴缸洗简单多了 |
| [15:14] | Yeah, the idea came to me when I was rinsing off | 是吧 这主意是我最近清洗掉在地上的烤鸡 |
| [15:16] | a rotisserie chicken I recently dropped on the floor. | 那时候想到的 |
| [15:20] | – Where’s Ernie? – What are you doing here? | – 我儿子呢 – 你回来干嘛 |
| [15:22] | Oh, thank God you’re okay. | 哦 谢天谢地你没事 |
| [15:25] | Why didn’t you pick up your phone? | 你干嘛不接电话 |
| [15:26] | ‘Cause I was dancing with Gary. | 因为 我在跟Gary跳舞呢 |
| [15:28] | Okay, everything’s fine. | 很好 所有事都安然无恙 |
| [15:31] | Sheila’s not here. I made it. | Sheila也还没到 我成功及时赶到 |
| [15:33] | What’d you guys do to my apartment? | 你们俩把我家怎么了 |
| [15:35] | We got to clean this place up | 要赶快打扫干净 |
| [15:37] | and get you guys out of here before– | 然后你们俩也要赶紧离开 要在 |
| [15:38] | Why is my son in a sink? | 我儿子怎么在水槽里 |
| [15:42] | Well, I recently dropped a rotisserie chicken on the floor… | 哦 我最近把烤鸡掉地上了 |
| [15:46] | Chris, what is wrong with you? | Chris 你有毛病啊 |
| [15:49] | We specifically said no babysitters. | 不是特地说好 不找保姆吗 |
| [15:57] | Come on, Sheila. | 快点儿 Sheila |
| [15:59] | We’re gonna be late. | 我们要迟到了 |
| [16:00] | You really had a date with Kareem Abdul-Jabbar? | 你真的约了Kareem Abdul-Jabbar |
| [16:03] | Yes, Chris. I do not lie. | 是的 Chris 我从不撒谎 |
| [16:05] | Hi, I am just a huge fan of yours. | 你好 我是你的超级大粉丝 |
| [16:08] | Um, and I actually have to go patch things up with my wife, | 呃 虽然我还有哄老婆的任务在身 |
| [16:11] | but I was wondering if, before I go, | 但我想 在我走之前 |
| [16:13] | I could get a photograph of you pretending to dunk my son? | 能拍张你用我儿子灌篮的照片吗 |
| [16:16] | Sure. | 可以啊 |
| [16:17] | That’s a cool idea. Do mine too. | 好主意 我也要 |
| [16:20] | No. No one’s dunking any babies. | 不准 谁都不许拿宝宝们灌篮 |
| [16:22] | – Why? – Because it’s a bad idea. | – 为啥 – 因为这主意烂透了 |
| [16:25] | How is it a bad idea? It’s awesome. | 怎么烂了 明明很赞 |
| [16:27] | – Chris, I said no. – Okay, you can’t just say no | – Chris 我说了不准 – 为毛 你有什么合理的理由 |
| [16:30] | without having a good reason. | 说不准呢 |
| [16:31] | I do have a good reason– | 我有最佳理由 |
| [16:33] | Grew inside me. | 他-是-我-生-的 |
| [16:40] | I don’t care where he grew. | 我不在乎他是谁生的 |
| [16:42] | Woo. Here we go. | 哎哟 好戏登场 |
| [16:43] | Hold on. Wait for me. | 等等 一起围观 |
| [16:45] | Excuse me? | 你再说一次 |
| [16:47] | I ruined my date tonight | 我毁了我今晚的约会 |
| [16:48] | because I let you make me crazy, | 因为我被你搞疯了 |
| [16:50] | and I’m not letting you do that any more. | 我再也不会让你对我这么做了 |
| [16:51] | I am in charge of Ernie, not you, | 今儿Ernie归我管 你闪一边儿去 |
| [16:54] | so you’re just gonna have to start trusting my decisions, okay? | 你要学着开始信任我的决定 好么 |
| [16:57] | I’m Ernie’s dad, and I know what I’m doing. | 我是他爸爸 我知道自己在干嘛 |
| [16:59] | Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, dunk my baby. | Kareem Abdul-Jabbar 请灌我儿吧 |
| [17:03] | No. Do not dunk that baby. | 不 别灌我儿 |
| [17:06] | – Dunk the baby. – Dunk the baby. | – 灌我儿 – 灌他儿啊 |
| [17:08] | Dunk it. Then dunk me. | 灌了他 然后再灌我 |
| [17:24] | Whoo. | 吼 |
| [17:28] | You got it? | 拍到了么 |
| [17:29] | Oh, it’s perfect. | 超完美 |
| [17:31] | Yeah. | 耶 |
| [17:32] | Okay, hi, sweetheart. Hi, hi, hi. | 好吧 嗨 小宝贝 嗨 乖 乖 |
| [17:34] | Are you happy? | 你开心了吧 |
| [17:35] | Did you prove your point? | 证明好你的观点了 |
| [17:37] | Yeah. Yes. As a matter of fact, I did. | 是的 事实上 我证明好了 |
| [17:39] | Ernie’s totally fine. | Ernie没事啊 |
| [17:40] | Just like he always is with me. | 他跟我在一起一直都没事 |
| [17:42] | Look, Sheila, raising a kid is hard enough | 看 Sheila 抚养孩子是很辛苦的 |
| [17:45] | and then being divorced on top of that– | 更何况我们又离婚了 |
| [17:47] | we have to start working together for Ernie’s sake. | 看在Ernie的份儿上我们必须得合作才行 |
| [17:52] | You’re right. Okay. | 你说得对 好吧 |
| [17:57] | You can pick him up tomorrow. | 你明天来接他吧 |
| [17:58] | – Go enjoy your date. – Okay. | – 好好约会哦 – 好的 |
| [18:02] | Okay, good-bye, my little prince. | 好的 再见了 我的小王子 |
| [18:03] | I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, | 我爱你爱你爱你爱你 |
| [18:05] | I will see you tomorrow, okay? | 明天见啦 好吗 |
| [18:06] | And I will think only of you until then. | 在那之前我只想着你哦 |
| [18:08] | What about me? | 那我呢 |
| [18:10] | Yeah, what about you? | 就是啊 那你呢 |
| [18:14] | I cannot believe you dunked my son. | 真不敢相信你竟然敢拿我儿子灌篮 |
| [18:17] | Listen, Sheila, this is our first date. | 听着 Sheila 这是我们第一次约会 |
| [18:20] | You got to chill out a little bit. | 你得淡定一点才行 |
| [18:22] | No, you need to chill out, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. | 不 你才要淡定一点 Kareem Abdul-Jabbar |
| [18:31] | Way to go, man. You slayed the dragon. | 干得漂亮再接再厉啊哥们儿 你成功屠龙了 |
| [18:34] | You know, it is fun playing with your life. | 知道么 把你的小日子玩弄于鼓掌间挺有趣的 |
| [18:49] | Nick Nick? | |
| [18:57] | What is all this? | 这是咋啦 |
| [18:58] | This is the deck of the Titanic. | 这 是泰坦尼克号的甲板 |
| [19:06] | The year is 1912, | 时空回溯到是1912年 |
| [19:08] | passengers are huddled together for warmth, | 乘客们聚在一起取暖 |
| [19:11] | death hangs in the air. | 空气中却弥漫着死亡的气息 |
| [19:13] | – And what’s that? – Ooh, haven’t you heard? | – 那又是啥 – 哦 你还没听说么 |
| [19:16] | That is an iceberg. | 那 是座冰山 |
| [19:18] | We’ve hit it. | 我们迎面撞了上去 |
| [19:21] | Now I know that we’re slowly taking on water | 而现在 我们正慢慢的被海水覆盖 |
| [19:23] | and hundreds of poor people are drowning belowdecks, | 数以百计的的生灵都淹没在甲板下 |
| [19:28] | but I would be honored if I could have this dance. | 但如果你能与我共舞 那就太荣幸了 |
| [19:32] | I married a crazy person. | 我嫁了个疯子 |
| [19:35] | So do you forgive me? | 那 你原谅我了么 |
| [19:37] | If I must. | 不原谅行么 |
| [19:39] | Well, then, this is for you. | 这个 是送给你的 |
| [19:44] | Oh, it’s beautiful. | 哦 很好看哦 |
| [19:47] | It’s the largest diamond in the world. | 这可是这世上最大的钻石呢 |
| [19:51] | And it’s filled with lip gloss. | 而且里面装满的唇彩哦 |
| [19:56] | I love you. | 我爱你 |
| [19:57] | I love you too. | 我也爱你 |
| [20:03] | Hey, baby. | 嗨 北鼻 |
| [20:07] | Oh, boy, she’s back. | 哦 天哪 她回来了 |
| [20:11] | You are a good man. | 你是个好男人 |
| [20:13] | Oh, baby, I am a tired man. | 哦 北鼻 我是个疲惫的好男人 |
| [20:19] | Correction: I’m a wide-awake man | 更正: 我是异常清醒的好男人 |
| [20:22] | with a slightly inebriated wife. | 而且我老婆还喝醉了 |
| [20:25] | What are you doing in there? | 你们在里面干嘛 |
| [20:28] | – Let us in! – Go away! | – 让我们进去 – 奏凯! |
| [20:30] | This is all we have any more! | 我们就剩这一点空间了 |
| [20:35] | Hurry before they pick the lock. | 快点在他们开锁之前来一发 |
| [20:39] | Hey, Sheila. | 嘿 Sheila |
| [20:41] | Nah, I’m just sitting here watching Goodfellas. | 不 我正看好家伙呢 |
| [20:44] | No, of course not. Ernie’s been in bed for an hour. | 没 当然没 Ernie一小时前就睡了 |
| [20:49] | Okay, I’m sure we’ll talk tomorrow. | 好 我们明天再聊 |
| [20:50] | Okay, we used to love each other. Bye. | 好的 我们曾相爱过 再见 |
| [20:54] | I mean, I found it funny. Okay, bye. | 我是说 我觉得挺好笑的 好吧 再见 |
| [20:56] | We used to love each other. | 我们曾经相爱过喔 |
| [21:00] | Haven’t heard from Megan, so I guess we can assume | Megan还没打电话来 所以 我们可以得出结论 |
| [21:02] | I blew that, but you know what? | 我和她算是吹了 但你猜怎么招 |
| [21:04] | Doesn’t matter. It’s okay. | 没有关系 没有 |
| [21:06] | As long as I got you, I’m good. | 只要你在我身边 我就万事大吉 |
| [21:08] | Sons before buns, little man. | 酒肉不重要 儿子才是宝 小家伙 |
| [21:13] | We’re gonna be okay. | 我们会好起来的 |
| [21:15] | Unlike Joe Pesci in about three, two, one… | 不像Joe Pesci(好家伙人物)再过3 2 1 秒就 |