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柯明斯基理论(The Kominsky Method)第1季第3集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计

Posted on 2024年7月12日 By jubentaici_movie_user 柯明斯基理论(The Kominsky Method)第1季第3集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计无评论
目录
S01E01
S01E02
S01E03
S01E04
S01E05
S01E06
S01E07
S01E08
S02E01
S02E02
S02E03
S02E04
S02E05
S02E06
S02E07
S02E08
S03E01
S03E02
S03E03
S03E04
S03E05
S03E06
时间 英文 中文
[00:18] The thing is, it was probably six or seven years ago… 事实上 应该是六七年前…
[00:21] Oh, thank you. 哦 谢谢
[00:23] My condolences. 请节哀顺变
[00:24] Thank you for coming. 谢谢你能来
[00:26] Norman, forgive me for saying this, 诺曼 请原谅我接下来的话
[00:28] but when you sit shivah for a loved one, 但是如果你要为所爱的人服丧
[00:30] all the mirrors in the house are supposed to be covered. 应该把房子里所有的镜子都遮起来
[00:33] I know. I’m just not that kind of Jew. 我知道 但我不是那种类型的犹太人
[00:36] Really? 真的吗
[00:36] And what kind of Jew are you? 那你是哪种犹太人
[00:38] I’m… I’m the atheist kind. 我是不信教的那种
[00:42] Condolences. 节哀顺变
[00:44] Enjoy the shrimp. 好好享用虾
[00:46] I know this is a difficult time, but try not to be an asshole. 我知道这是艰难时期 但是尽量不要表现得像个混蛋
[00:50] If he didn’t want to be insulted, 如果他不想受到侮辱的话
[00:51] he shouldn’t have become a rabbi. 就不应该当拉比
[00:53] But on the upside, 但是好的是
[00:55] Mindy told me that the funeral’s on Twitter. 明迪告诉我葬礼在推特上直播了
[00:57] No kidding? 真的吗
[00:58] Yeah. Apparently we’re “Trendy.” 是啊 显然我们上了热搜榜
[01:02] Leno sure did a good job. 莱诺毫无疑问做的很棒
[01:03] Respectful but funny. 充满敬意又不失风趣
[01:05] I like that he’s still bitter about me. Shows I made an impact. 我喜欢他被我惹恼的样子 说明我有影响力
[01:08] Well, I think Eileen would’ve approved. 呃 我相信艾琳会认可这样的
[01:11] I know she approved. 我知道她会的
[01:12] – Oh, you know? – I know. -哦 你真的知道吗 -我就是知道
[01:16] – Okay. – Hey, Rabbi. -好吧 -嗨 拉比
[01:18] Shalom, baby. 你好啊 宝贝儿
[01:20] And Phoebe came. 菲比来了
[01:22] We’re supposed to love our children unconditionally. 我们应该毫无条件地爱我们的孩子
[01:25] Such nonsense. 这真是荒唐
[01:26] Is there a Mrs. Rabbi? 你有拉比夫人吗
[01:28] I don’t know if I can forgive her, Sandy. 我不知道我会不会原谅她 桑迪
[01:31] You will. You’ve just got to allow some healing to take place. 你会的 你只需要允许自己从悲痛中走出来
[01:33] You know, it’s a… A process. 你懂的 得有个过程
[01:36] You done with the platitudes? 你当够人生导师了吗
[01:38] I don’t have to be. I mean, you want more? 我不必一直这样啊 你希望我继续吗
[01:40] – No. – A stitch in time means nine. -别了 -小洞不补大洞吃苦
[01:42] – Yeah. – A bird in the hand is worth something. -好了 -一鸟在手胜过什么来着
[01:45] – I forget what. – All right. -我记不清了 -好的够了
[01:53] So I’m only asking because my husband turned out to be gay 我之所以这么问 是因为我老公竟然是个同性恋
[01:57] and it really ruined our sex life. 这真的毁了我们的性福生活
[01:59] Well, I’m sorry to hear that. 呃 我很遗憾
[02:01] Did you try lying on your stomach? 你们试过后入吗
[02:03] Oh, I tried everything. 哦 我尝试过一切了
[02:05] I mean, come on, you’d think, 我是说 一切 一切你能想到的
[02:06] like, a hole is a hole is a hole, you know? 反正前后都是洞 你明白吗
[02:09] You’d think. 是吗
[02:11] Yeah, uh, nice, uh… 好了 很高兴 呃…
[02:13] It was nice talking to you. 很高兴和你聊天
[02:16] Are we done? 话题结束了吗
[02:20] So that’s a story, huh? 她就是个奇葩 对吧
[02:22] Yeah. She used to babysit me. 是啊 她在我小的时候照顾过我
[02:24] – You’re kidding? – Yeah. -真的吗 -对呀
[02:26] I remember once she took me to see Troop Beverly Hills. 我记得有一次她带我去看《比弗利山超级娘子军》
[02:29] Oh, that’s nice. 哦 那还不错
[02:30] Kind of. 还行吧
[02:31] She sat behind me and gave her boyfriend a hand job. 她坐在我后面 给她男友撸了一发
[02:34] Oh, God! 哦 我的天
[02:35] Yeah. Good movie, though. 是啊 不过电影不错
[02:39] – Shelley Long? – Yeah. -谢莉·朗演的吗 -对
[02:43] – Norman. – Yeah. -诺曼 -在
[02:45] I made up this plate for you. 我给你拿了盘吃的
[02:47] Oh, no… no thanks. I’m not hungry. 哦 不用了 谢谢 我不饿
[02:49] I am. 我饿了
[02:50] The food’s in the kitchen. 厨房有吃的
[02:53] I’m so very sorry for your loss. 我真的真的很遗憾你失去了亲人
[02:56] Well, thank you. Thank you. 谢谢你 谢谢你
[02:58] Eileen was such a… A great lady. 艾琳是一个非常伟大的女士
[03:01] – One of a kind. – Yes, she was. -出类拔萃 -是的 确实如此
[03:03] – Norman, I brought you a plate. – I got this. -诺曼 我给你带了一盘吃的 -我已经拿过了
[03:07] And she loved you so very much. 而且她是那么的爱你
[03:10] – Excuse me. – Where are you going? -失陪 -你要去哪
[03:12] I… I’m going to the bathroom. 我要去卫生间
[03:14] – Again? – Yes, again. Are you counting? -又去 -是的 又去 你给我数着吗
[03:17] Yeah, I am. You’re closing in on double digits. 是的 我是在数着 次数都快接近两位数了
[03:20] Oh, I appreciate your concern. 哦 我真是太谢谢你的关心了
[03:22] I’ll dedicate this one to you. 我要把这次献给你
[03:24] Norman, listen to me. 诺曼 听我说
[03:26] – Mmm. Yes. – I know that your instinct -行吧 -我知道你的直觉告诉你
[03:29] is to go through all of this by yourself, 要自己独自承受这一切
[03:33] but that’s wrong. 但是那样是不对的
[03:34] Huh. 是嘛
[03:35] It really does take a village. 这一切真的需要举全村之力
[03:38] – It does? – Yes. -真的需要吗 -真的
[03:41] Let me be your village. 让我成为你的全村之力
[03:44] But you’re just one person. 可你只是一个人
[03:47] Exactly. 正是如此
[03:56] So that’s it? 这就完事儿了
[03:57] Now we’re trickling? 现在又成涓涓细流了吗
[04:03] *Raindrops keep falling on my head* *雨点不断落在我头上*
[04:18] This is the last chance before I put you away. 这可是我把你收起来前的最后机会了啊
[04:24] Excuse me! 打扰一下
[04:26] Excuse me! 打扰一下
[04:32] I would like to make a toast to my mother, Eileen Newlander. 我想向我母亲艾琳·纽兰德致辞
[04:35] You all knew her as a loving and generous woman. 你们都知道她是一个善良慷慨的女性
[04:39] She was always ready to give her time and her money 她永远会为那些需要她的人
[04:44] to those in need. 奉献时间和金钱
[04:47] Yeah. 是的
[04:49] She was there for anyone who didn’t come out of her vagina. 她总是关心着所有人 除了从她阴道里爬出来的亲生女儿
[04:54] – Oh! – Okay, that’s it. -哦 -好了 说得够了
[04:58] Let’s go. 我们走吧
[04:59] – Should I have said C-section? – Come on. -我应该说剖腹产吗 -快走
[05:12] Where’ve you been? 你刚才去哪了
[05:13] – Bathroom. – Again? -洗手间 -又去了
[05:16] What’s with everybody counting? 为什么所有人都在数着次数
[05:17] I’m not counting. I just noticed. 我没有特意数着 我只是注意到了而已
[05:20] – What’s wrong? – Nothing’s wrong. -怎么了 -没怎么
[05:21] I think something’s going on with his prostate. 我想他的前列腺出了点毛病
[05:23] Excuse me. I’d rather my daughter not discuss my prostate. 不好意思 我宁愿我的女儿不要谈论我的前列腺
[05:27] It’s nothing to be embarrassed about. 这又没什么可害羞的
[05:29] My ex had all kinds of prostate problems. It’s treatable. 我的前夫有各种各样的前列腺问题 是可以治愈的
[05:32] Okay, I’m gonna say it again. 好吧 我再重申一次
[05:33] I don’t want to discuss my prostate with my child. 我不想和我的孩子讨论我的前列腺
[05:35] Or hear about your husband’s prostate. 我也不想听关于你丈夫前列腺的事
[05:37] Ex-husband. 前夫
[05:38] – Did he have prostate cancer? – Yep. -他得过前列腺癌吗 -对
[05:40] But they took it out and it’s fine. 但是后来发现没什么大事儿
[05:42] – Was he able to… – Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah. With Viagra. -他还能… -哦 当然 当然可以 在伟哥的帮助下
[05:47] Okay, I’m walkin’ away here. 好吧 我要离开这儿
[05:49] Goin’ back to the bathroom? 回厕所去吗
[05:52] Maybe. 也许吧
[05:56] Well… 嗯
[05:57] – Cheers. – Cheers. -干杯 -干杯
[06:02] Oh, here you are hiding. 哦 原来你在这儿躲着
[06:07] Dianne, please. 黛安娜 求你了
[06:09] For 46 years, I’ve lived in one village. 46年了 我只住在一个村子里
[06:12] It was a wonderful village. It was warm. Nice huts. 那是一个棒极了的村子 它很温馨 房子很棒
[06:15] And I’m sorry, but from here on, I’m just gonna… 我很抱歉 但是从现在起 我就打算…
[06:18] I’m gonna be village-less. I’m a nomad. 我打算不住在村子里了 我现在是个游牧者
[06:22] What are you talking about? 你胡说些什么啊
[06:24] What are you talking about? 你在说什么
[06:27] I need my coat. 我在找我的外套
[06:29] It’s the tan one with the gold buttons. 是褐色有金色纽扣的那件
[06:35] I’m sorry. 抱歉
[06:39] Phoebe. 菲比
[06:42] Jesus. Phoebe! 我的天 菲比
[06:44] Phoebe! 菲比
[06:47] Phoebe! 菲比
[06:52] Jesus. 上帝啊
[06:59] Phoebe! 菲比
[07:04] Can I buy you a new coat? 我给你买件新外套吧
[07:10] Thanks. 谢谢
[07:13] Thank you for a lovely… funeral. 谢谢你邀请我参加这个美妙的…葬礼
[07:16] You’re welcome. 太客气了
[07:17] Can’t wait to tell all my friends that Barbra Streisand hit on me. 等不及想要告诉我的朋友们芭芭拉·史翠珊和我调情了
[07:21] Don’t flatter yourself. He hit on me, too! 可别自我陶醉了 他也和我调情了好吗
[07:25] So are you, uh… are you staying at Norman’s tonight? 那么你…你今晚要陪在诺曼那里吗
[07:29] No, I’m gonna give him a little space with his daughter. 不 我打算给他和他女儿留点空间
[07:32] Good plan. 好主意
[07:35] I, uh… I’d, uh, invite you in, but, uh… my son is, uh… 我 呃 我本应该邀请你进去 但是…我儿子
[07:40] I understand. 我能理解
[07:41] Thanks. 谢谢
[07:43] Good night. 晚安
[08:21] This is complete and utter bullshit. 真他妈操蛋
[08:32] Very good. 很好
[08:34] Okay, who wants to go next? 好了 谁想下一个表演
[08:37] – Jude, please present. – Thanks. -裘德 请开始你的表演 -谢谢
[08:39] I’ve been thinking a lot about what you said to me last class. 上堂课你对我说的话 我回去思考了很多
[08:43] You’ve been thinking? 你回去思考了
[08:44] – Well, that’s encouraging. – Yeah. -嗯 真是鼓舞人心 -是的
[08:46] You said that I’m relying too much on how I look 你说我过于依赖自己的长相
[08:48] and not challenging myself as an actor, 而不是将自己作为一个演员来挑战自己
[08:50] so I decided to do something 所以我决定采取一些行动
[08:51] that’s gonna take me out of my comfort zone. 来迫使自己跳出舒适圈
[08:53] Terrific. What did you pick? 好极了 你选了什么
[08:54] A monologue from Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom by August Wilson. 一段选自奥古斯特·威尔逊所著《玛·雷尼的扭摆舞》的独白
[08:54] 1982年话剧作品 记录了二十世纪非裔美国人的经历 涉及种族 艺术 宗教以及白人制作人对黑人艺术家的剥削等问题
[08:59] – Really? – Yep. -真的吗 -是的
[09:01] You’re… you’re sure about this? 你…确定要表演这部剧吗
[09:05] Okay, let’s… let’s see it. 好的 让我们…我们看看
[09:15] Levee’s gots to be Levee. 列维注定就是列维那样的人
[09:19] And he don’t need nobody 而且他根本不需要任何人
[09:21] messin’ around with him about the white man. 在他周围大谈特谈白佬
[09:27] ‘Cause you don’t know nothin’ about me! 因为你根本对我一无所知
[09:30] You don’t know Levee. 你不了解列维
[09:33] You don’t know what type of blood I got! 你不理解我骨子里到底流淌着怎样的血液
[09:37] What type of heart I got beatin’ in here! 我的胸膛里跳动着什么样的心脏
[09:45] I was eight years old 我那时只有八岁
[09:47] when a gang of the white mens… 一帮白佬
[09:49] come inside of my daddy’s house 闯进我爸爸的房子
[09:52] and have to do my mama any way they wanted, and– 并对我妈妈为所欲为 还…
[09:57] Excuse me. I– 对不起 我
[09:58] I’m sorry. I don’t think I’m comfortable with this. 抱歉 我对他的表演感到很不舒服
[10:00] Me neither. 我也是
[10:01] – Why not? – I don’t know. -为什么 -我不知道
[10:02] It just, um… It just seems wrong. 只是 呃 就是看起来不太对劲
[10:05] Well, I don’t think that that’s your call. I mean, is it wrong? 嗯 我觉得你可说了不算 你觉得看起来不对劲儿吗
[10:09] Why are you askin’ me? 你为什么要问我
[10:10] I think if you look past 我想如果能暂时忽视
[10:11] how super fucked up it is, it’s very brave. 它有多垃圾的话 这段表演还是很有胆量的
[10:14] Super-duper fucked up. 真的是无比垃圾了
[10:16] I mean, just because I’m not black 我是说 虽然我不是黑人
[10:18] doesn’t mean I can’t be offended. 但这并不代表我不会被冒犯到
[10:20] I mean, I’m allowed to be offended, right? 我是说 我是可以被冒犯的 是吧
[10:23] – Or is it offensive just to ask? – Mm. -还是说单单问了这个问题就已经冒犯到你了 -嗯
[10:27] Okay. 好了
[10:29] Everybody better stop lookin’ at me or shit will go down. 你们最好不要再盯着我看了 否则我就要发火了
[10:32] Sandy, you may wanna weigh in on this. 桑迪 你不想发表什么意见吗
[10:37] Dad, you in there? 老爸 你在里面吗
[10:39] Yeah. 在
[10:41] We’ve got a racially charged situation happening in class. 课堂上出现了种族歧视的问题
[10:44] Are you gonna be long? 你还要很久吗
[10:46] I don’t know. 我不知道
[10:51] I don’t know what to do. Do… Do we put her in another rehab? 我不知道该做些什么 难道 难道我们把她送去另一个戒瘾中心吗
[10:54] Unless she wants to get sober, I don’t see the point. 除非她自己主动想要戒掉 否则没什么意义
[10:58] Well, we can’t do nothing. 我们总不能什么都不做
[11:00] Are you sure? 你确定吗
[11:01] Maybe it’s time to let her hit bottom. 也许是时候让她撞一撞南墙了
[11:03] What’s bottom? 什么南墙
[11:05] Homeless? In a mental institution? Jail? 无家可归 关进精神精神病院还是坐牢
[11:08] I don’t know. 说不好
[11:09] I know that what we’ve been doing isn’t working, so… 我只知道我们的努力并没有什么效果 所以…
[11:16] It’s gonna be okay. 一切都会好起来的
[11:17] You’ll see. 走着瞧
[11:20] This is not good. 这可不太妙
[11:22] No shit. 确实不妙
[11:33] Am I interrupting? 我打扰到你了吗
[11:34] Course not. Sit down. 当然没有 请坐
[11:36] You sure? 你确定吗
[11:38] Yeah, sit. 当然 坐吧
[11:41] Want some coffee? 要来点咖啡吗
[11:42] No. It just makes me pee. 不 那只会让我尿多
[11:44] Well, it’s a diuretic. 咖啡确实利尿
[11:48] You wouldn’t happen to have a, uh… 你不会恰好认识个…
[11:51] urologist that you like? 你比较喜欢的泌尿科医生吧
[11:52] Like? 喜欢
[11:53] No one likes their urologist, but I do have a good one. 没人喜欢泌尿科医生 但我确实有个很优秀的
[11:56] I need his number. 我需要他的联系方式
[11:58] I already gave it to Mindy. She’s gonna make you an appointment. 我已经给明迪了 她会帮你预约
[12:01] Jesus, everything in my pants is public knowledge. 老天 我裤子里的事真是人尽皆知
[12:04] I’m just glad you’re not in denial anymore. 我只是很高兴你不再回避这件事了
[12:06] Norman, yesterday I kissed a woman goodnight 诺曼 昨天晚上我和一位女士吻别
[12:09] and then urinated on her bush. 然后就在她的灌木丛撒了尿
[12:12] I’m sorry? 什么
[12:14] The bush outside her house. 她房子外边的灌木丛
[12:18] Yeah, that’s… that’s a slow, dripping cry for help. 是啊 那便是在悄无声息地寻求帮助
[12:21] Dad? 爸爸
[12:23] You mind if I have some friends over? 你介意我请朋友过来吗
[12:25] Yes, I mind, and go and put some clothes on! 是的 我介意 去把衣服穿好
[12:28] It’s just Sandy. What’s he gonna do? 只是桑迪而已 他又不会怎样
[12:31] Come on! 拜托
[12:34] What am I supposed to do with her? 我该拿她怎么办
[12:35] I don’t know. 我不知道
[12:37] I guess just love her. 我猜爱她就行了
[12:41] You’re useless. 你真是没用
[12:47] Okay. 好的
[12:48] And fill these out, and the doctor will see you shortly. 填好这个 医生很快就会见你
[12:52] Thank you. 谢谢
[12:54] Just so you know, I’m here for penis reduction surgery. 顺便一提 我是来做阴茎缩短手术的
[12:58] Okay. 好的
[12:59] Been getting some complaints lately. 最近老是有人抱怨
[13:02] Got it. 了解
[13:32] Jesus Christ. 老天
[13:35] The sad part is, that water cooler has a better flow than I do. 悲伤的是 那饮水机的水流比我的还稳
[13:42] How often do you have to come here? 你多久来一次这里
[13:52] Not cool, man. 那么问可不好
[13:54] Not cool. 很不好
[14:09] Oh, for Christ’s sake. 哦 老天啊
[14:11] Whatever happened to hanging things up? 怎么都不知道把东西挂起来
[14:18] 艾琳·纽兰德 止痛药
[14:20] I don’t believe this! 难以置信
[14:24] – You’re stealing drugs from your mother? – What? -你在偷你母亲的药吗 -什么
[14:27] What kind– 什么样的…
[14:31] What kind of a person does that? 什么样的人会那么做
[14:32] What kind of a person steals drugs from their mother? 什么样的人会从自己的母亲那里偷药
[14:35] It’s not that big of a deal. 这有什么大不了的
[14:36] I hurt my back, I was looking for Advil, 我背部受伤了 想找布洛芬吃
[14:39] – and I found that stuff. – Oh, you hurt your back? -只找到了那个 -哦 你背部受伤了啊
[14:41] Really? Really? How’d you hurt your back? 真的吗 你是怎么受伤的
[14:45] – It was a pretty silly story, actually– – Liar! -那是个挺蠢的故事… -骗子
[14:49] So there’s nothin’ else goin’ on, besides the frequent urination? 所以除了尿频以外没有其他症状吗
[14:54] No. I mean, I have had a little bronchial irritation, 没有 之前倒是有点支气管炎
[14:57] but that’s kinda out of your purview, isn’t it? 不过那好像不是你的专长吧
[14:59] Yeah. 没错
[15:00] Anyway, we’re gonna do some tests 不管怎样 我们要做些检查
[15:02] and make sure there’s nothin’ serious goin’ on. 确保没什么严重的问题
[15:04] What do you mean by “Serious”? “严重”是指什么
[15:06] Cancer. 癌症
[15:08] Oh, right. Right. 哦 好吧
[15:09] But, uh… based on your symptoms, 但是 基于你的症状
[15:12] I… I would say we’re dealin’ with prostatic hyperplasia. 我觉得应该是前列腺增生
[15:16] Which means? 什么意思
[15:17] You’ve got a big prostate. 你有个大号的前列腺
[15:19] Which means? 什么意思
[15:20] It means you’re gonna pee a lot. 意思是你会尿多
[15:22] Can you tell me something I don’t know? 你能说点我不知道的吗
[15:25] I got to second base with my nurse last night. 昨晚我和我的护士”上了二垒”
[15:29] That’s an old joke, but I did. 这是个经典笑话 不过也是事实
[15:31] Congratulations. 恭喜
[15:32] What about my prostate? 那我的前列腺呢
[15:34] Well… 这个嘛
[15:36] We have options. 有几种选择
[15:37] There’s drugs and there’s transurethral resection. 可以用药 也可以做经尿道电切术
[15:41] And what’s involved with that? 那是要干什么
[15:42] I drill through your penis 我沿着你的阴茎钻进去
[15:44] and core out your prostate like a Roto-Rooter. 然后像通下水道一样把你的前列腺弄出来
[15:47] Oh, my God. 我的老天
[15:48] Yeah, it’s… it’s an exciting time to be a urologist. 这就是泌尿科医生的激动时刻
[15:50] But let’s not get ahead of ourselves. 但是现在我们不用太担心
[15:52] Drop your drawers. Lay on your side over there. 脱下内裤 侧躺下来
[15:55] I’ll poke around in there and see what we got. 我摸摸看里面是什么情况
[16:02] You keep saying “We.” 你一直在说”我们”
[16:05] You complete me. 你使我完整
[16:07] I gotta ask, when you were a young guy in med school, 我得问问 当你还是个上医学院的年轻人时
[16:10] what made you decide to become a urologist? 是什么让你决定成为泌尿科医生的
[16:12] I get asked that a lot. 经常有人这么问我
[16:15] And the answer is? 答案是
[16:17] Variety. 多样性
[16:19] Dicks are like snowflakes. 阴茎就像是雪花
[16:21] There’s no two alike. 没有两个是一样的
[16:23] Say “Ah.” 说”啊”
[16:25] Ah! 啊
[16:27] Why’d you come back? Is it money? 你为什么会来 是为了钱吗
[16:30] Because you should know that you’re not in your mother’s will. 你要知道你母亲的遗嘱里没有你
[16:33] It all goes to me, and when I’m gone, I’m leaving it to charity. 全都归我了 等我死后 我会全捐给慈善组织
[16:36] Good, because I don’t want your money! 很好 你的钱我一分都不要
[16:38] Well, you’re not getting any! 你一分也拿不到
[16:43] Phoebe? 菲比
[16:46] Phoebe! 菲比
[16:48] Are you taking drugs? 你在嗑药吗
[16:50] I am taking a dump! 我在拉屎
[16:53] I just need a minute. The Percoset makes me constipated. 稍等一会 止痛药让我有点便秘
[17:00] Well, you don’t deserve it, but there’s Metamucil under the sink. 虽然你不配吃 但是水槽下面有纤维素[通便药]
[17:05] Thank you, Daddy. 谢谢你 爸爸
[17:07] Yeah. 没事
[17:08] All right, now bear down on me. 好了 往我这边用力
[17:10] That’s it. Bear down. 就是这样 用力
[17:12] ‘Cause I’ve gotta… Come on. Push, push! 因为我得…加油 用力
[17:14] You know, the funny thing is, 知道吗 有趣的是
[17:17] even gay guys don’t like this. 连同性恋都不喜欢这样
[17:19] That’s hilarious. 真好笑
[17:20] Push, push, push! I’ve gotta touch it. 用力 用力 我得摸到它
[17:22] Push! I’ve gotta feel it with my finger. 用力 我得用手指感觉到它
[17:24] Quick! There you go. 快点 就是这样
[17:26] That’s it. That’s– 好了 那…
[17:28] Oh, that’s a big, old prostate. 真是个又大又老的前列腺
[17:31] Any chance that my ass is just shrinking? 有没有可能是因为我的屁股收缩了
[17:34] That’s a good one. I’m gonna use that. 很有趣 我回头要用用这个笑话
[17:37] Here. Here, wipe. 给 擦擦吧
[17:40] What, no spooning? 怎么 不侧入我一下吗
[17:43] That one, I heard before. 这个我之前倒是听过
[17:48] Now what? 现在呢
[17:49] Now we check your PSA test, see if you’ve got any cancer. 现在我们会检查你的前列腺特异抗原 看看你有没有得癌症
[17:52] And how long does that take? 那要花多久
[17:53] – Ah, a couple of days. – And if there is? -几天 -如果查出了癌症呢
[17:56] We do a biopsy and see if it’s snail, turtle, or rabbit. 我们会做个活体组织检查 看看是蜗牛型 乌龟型还是兔型
[18:00] What? 什么
[18:01] Well, snail, slow-moving, no worries. 蜗牛 速度慢 不用担心
[18:03] Turtle, little faster, some worries. Rabbit… 乌龟 稍微迅速点 不用太担心 而兔子
[18:07] Floppy-eared and adorable? 耳朵大大很可爱
[18:10] Sure. 没错
[18:20] Daddy? 爸爸
[18:21] What? 什么
[18:23] I’m sorry. 我很抱歉
[18:24] Please save the tears for somebody who buys it. 省省你那假惺惺的眼泪吧
[18:27] No, seriously. I’m really sorry. 不 我是认真的 我真的很抱歉
[18:31] Why didn’t you ever visit? 你为什么从没有来探望
[18:33] Do you have any idea how much that hurt your mother? 你知道这让你母亲多伤心吗
[18:36] I, uh, don’t have a good reason. 我 没有很好的借口
[18:39] Give me a bad one. 不好的也行
[18:43] I didn’t think she was gonna die. 我以为她不会去世
[18:47] You know, I was very busy. 要知道我一直很忙
[18:49] You were busy! 你很忙啊
[18:57] I don’t know what else to say. 我不知道该说什么
[18:59] All right. 好吧
[19:00] Moving on. What are your plans now? 聊点别的 你现在有什么计划
[19:03] Well… 那个
[19:05] I was thinking I would stay with you for a little while. 我想陪你一段时间
[19:08] Really? 真的吗
[19:10] Would that be okay? 可以吗
[19:12] What about your apartment in New York? 你纽约的公寓怎么办
[19:13] – Well, that is a pretty funny story. – Stop! -那是个很有趣的故事 -闭嘴吧
[19:18] Okay, who’s next? 好了 下面到谁了
[19:21] Uh, Breana. What do you got? 布里安娜 你准备了什么
[19:24] Well, I was thinkin’ about Jude doin’ that August Wilson piece, 我一直在想裘德表演的奥古斯特·威尔逊作品里那段
[19:28] and it got me thinkin’ 我觉得
[19:30] maybe I should push myself into somethin’ out of my comfort zone. 也许我也应该跳出自己的舒适圈
[19:32] Okay. Taking chances. I like it. 好的 有冒险精神 我喜欢
[19:35] So I’m gonna do a monologue from The Boys in the Band. 所以我准备表演一段《乐队男孩》里的独白
[19:35] 1970年美国电影 基于同名舞台剧改编 首部聚焦同性恋角色的美国主流电影
[19:39] Oh, Christ. 哦 老天
[19:41] Okay, let’s see it. 好吧 开始吧
[19:49] What I am, Michael, 我是何人 迈克尔
[19:50] is a 32-year-old, ugly, pock-marked Jew fairy. 我只是个三十二岁 容貌丑陋 满脸痘疮的犹太娘炮
[19:56] And if it takes me a while to pull myself together, 如果我需要些时间才能振作起来
[19:59] and if I have to smoke a little grass 如果我需要抽些大烟
[20:01] before I get up the nerve to show my face to the world, 才能鼓起勇气向世人展示自己的面容
[20:04] it’s nobody’s goddamn business but my own. 那是我自己的事 与其他人无关
[20:07] All right. All right. 好了 好了
[20:09] Let’s pause right there. 先暂停一下
[20:10] Thank you. 谢谢
[20:11] Isn’t such a brave choice now, is it? 现在不觉得那是勇敢的选择了 对吗
[20:13] What Jude did was stupid. You’re being homophobic. 裘德做的是很蠢 而你则表现得恐同
[20:17] – Thank you. – All right, that’s enough. -真是多谢 -好了 闹够了
[20:19] Breana, grab your seat. 布里安娜 坐下吧
[20:26] Listen to me, all right? 听我说 好吗
[20:28] None of this matters. 这些都不重要
[20:29] None of this is worth getting offended over. This is all bullshit. 不值得因为这些而感到被冒犯 都没有意义
[20:33] Doesn’t matter whether you’re black, or gay, or… 无论你是黑人 同性恋或者…
[20:36] – Irish, French, and German. – Sure. -爱尔兰人 法国人和德国人 -当然
[20:38] – I did 23andMe. – That’s great. -我做了血统鉴定 -真好
[20:41] Doesn’t matter because inside we’re all exactly the same. 这些都不重要 因为我们内心都是相同的
[20:44] The life in you, in you, and you, 每个人的生命
[20:47] and you is the same life. 都是相同的
[20:48] Same electricity, just lighting up a different bulb. 就好比同样的电流点亮了不同的灯泡
[20:52] If you really want to get offended, 如果你真想体验被冒犯的感觉
[20:54] try cancerous glands in your asshole. 不妨试试屁眼里长个有癌症的腺体
[20:58] Excuse me. 抱歉
[21:00] I don’t get it. 我不明白
[21:02] I think it’s from a Mamet play. 我觉得是出自马梅特的剧作
[21:10] So, my darling, how was your day? 亲爱的 你今天过得如何
[21:13] I had a strange little man 有个古怪的小个子男人
[21:15] stick his finger up my ass. 把手指插进我的屁眼
[21:18] I envy you. 我好嫉妒
[21:20] How long is Phoebe staying? 菲比要在这里待多久
[21:22] I didn’t ask. 我没问
[21:23] I find everything with Phoebe is easier if I don’t ask. 我发现对菲比的事不闻不问会轻松很多
[21:27] The willful pursuit of ignorance. 无知是福
[21:29] – That’s smart. – Yeah. -很机智 -是啊
[21:32] Any news on the prostate front? 前列腺有什么情况
[21:33] No. Just trying to stay cool. 没有 只是尽量保持淡定
[21:35] Waiting for the results of the blood test. 等着血检结果
[21:38] Is eating spicy food your way 暴食辛辣食物
[21:39] of thumbing your nose at the specter of death? 是在向死神挑衅吗
[21:42] You are very wise. 你很有智慧
[21:45] I am a fountain. Drink from me. 我是智慧之泉 来汲取知识吧
[21:48] We will be punished for eating so late. 这么晚还吃东西会遭报应的
[21:50] Two TUMS and a Prilosec before bedtime, 睡前两片防胃酸咀嚼片再加一粒抗溃疡药
[21:53] and a thin pillow under your shoulders 肩膀下面垫一个薄枕头
[21:54] to elevate your upper torso while sleeping. 睡觉时把上身抬高
[21:56] Really? 真的吗
[21:58] Drink from me. 来汲取知识吧
[22:06] Haven’t seen you in a while. 很久没有见到你了
[22:08] Yeah. I’ve been, uh… you know, busy. 是啊 我一直…你知道的 很忙
[22:12] I think I just have a few shirts. 应该是有几件衬衫
[22:17] Okay, here we are. 好的 给
[22:20] So sorry. The dress was here a long time. 很抱歉 这件裙子在这里放了很久
[22:23] Must not have been picked up. 应该是一直没人来取
[22:28] Oh, my God. 哦 我的天
[22:43] Sorry. 抱歉
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