| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:00] | Synced and corrected by Katniss Everdeen www.MY-SUBS.com | |
| [00:00] | WWW.MY-SUBS.COM | |
| [00:02] | Thanks, Byron, that was actually really, really cool. | |
| [00:04] | I’ve never been to the Lincoln Memorial at night. | |
| [00:06] | Well, I’ve never seen anyone | |
| [00:08] | jump into Lincoln’s lap and take a selfie, so… | |
| [00:12] | And I’ve never run so fast from security. | |
| [00:15] | But it was your idea to play Truth or Dare. | |
| [00:17] | I say we keep playing. | |
| [00:19] | I dare you to go out on another date with me. | |
| [00:23] | Oh! I pick truth this time. | |
| [00:27] | Fine. Tell the truth. | |
| [00:29] | Do you want to go to the movies with me tomorrow night? | |
| [00:32] | I do, yeah. It’s a date. | |
| [00:34] | – Cool. – Oh, uh, you have an eyelash. | |
| [00:37] | You know what they say, if you blow on it | |
| [00:38] | and make a wish, then your wish can come true. | |
| [00:40] | – Oh, well… – Oh-kay! | |
| [00:43] | I wish you would leave my daughter alone | |
| [00:46] | and go home. | |
| [00:48] | You know, Mr. Cooper, you shouldn’t say your wish out loud, | |
| [00:51] | ’cause it might not come true. | |
| [00:52] | And you shouldn’t irritate your date’s father, | |
| [00:55] | or you won’t come back. | |
| [00:57] | Oh, look at the time! | |
| [01:00] | – Look at it! – I’d better get going. | |
| [01:02] | – Buh-bye. Buh-bye. – Okay. | |
| [01:04] | Buh-bye. Look at that! My wish came true! | |
| [01:07] | Hey! Ha ha! | |
| [01:08] | Dad, come on, that was not cool. | |
| [01:10] | Oh, I’m sorry, but I gotta brief you on a mission. | |
| [01:12] | Oh, what, is it Operation KC’s Never Gonna Have a Boyfriend? | |
| [01:15] | Oh, that’s an ongoing mission. | |
| [01:18] | – It’s going on… – Ugh! | |
| [01:19] | …and on till you’re 31! | |
| [02:09] | I keep it undercover. | |
| [02:11] | I keep it undercover. | |
| [02:15] | This is Henry Parker. | |
| [02:17] | He donated $5 million to American University, | |
| [02:20] | and they’re renaming the library in his honor. | |
| [02:23] | There’s been a bunch of threats against him, | |
| [02:25] | so you’re going to the ceremony to protect him. | |
| [02:27] | Who would hate someone who puts money towards a library? | |
| [02:30] | I hope it’s not Marisa. | |
| [02:34] | No, the threats were spelled correctly, | |
| [02:36] | and there were no hearts over the I’s. | |
| [02:40] | Okay, so what am I supposed to do, | |
| [02:42] | like, stand in the crowd and keep an eye out on him? | |
| [02:44] | Not exactly. You’re gonna be doing it from the drumline. | |
| [02:47] | Okay, yeah, one problem. I don’t know how to drum. | |
| [02:49] | Which is why they should’ve given this assignment to me! | |
| [02:52] | I was actually on the drumline in college. | |
| [02:55] | Pop! Wah! | |
| [02:58] | I’m sorry. Wait a minute. Uh… | |
| [03:01] | Dad, are you suggesting that you can | |
| [03:03] | go undercover as a college student? | |
| [03:04] | Well, I think I could pass for a senior. | |
| [03:06] | – Pfft! – Ha! A senior what, | |
| [03:08] | a senior citizen? | |
| [03:10] | Hey, come on. | |
| [03:12] | Okay, okay, okay. | |
| [03:13] | The Organization wants you up front and center, | |
| [03:15] | which means you have to get the big drum solo, | |
| [03:17] | and you’re gonna do it with these specialized drum sticks. | |
| [03:32] | Oh! Thank you, DC! | |
| [03:37] | You know, I got a real career with this. | |
| [03:40] | – Well… – Relax. | |
| [03:41] | With these, any idiot can drum like a pro. | |
| [03:44] | – Aah! Ow! – Okay. | |
| [03:47] | Apparently not any idiot. | |
| [03:52] | All right, everybody, we need to practice for the library dedication | |
| [03:55] | for some millionaire Henry Parker dude, or something. | |
| [03:58] | Look, I don’t know. | |
| [04:00] | I graduate in two weeks. | |
| [04:02] | I am super checked out. | |
| [04:04] | Um, all right, where’s William? | |
| [04:06] | We need to go over his solo. | |
| [04:07] | Actually, William couldn’t make it, | |
| [04:09] | so I’m filling in for him. | |
| [04:11] | I’m Cassandra Bailey | |
| [04:12] | from the drumline at Georgetown. | |
| [04:14] | What’s wrong with William? | |
| [04:15] | Something about his neck went out. | |
| [04:21] | But it’s cool. | |
| [04:23] | He taught me his solo, so I’m good to go. | |
| [04:25] | All right. Everybody, this is Cassandra. | |
| [04:29] | I guess she’ll be filling William’s shoes. | |
| [04:31] | Ah, actually, brought my own shoes. | |
| [04:33] | Ringworm is no joke, people. | |
| [04:37] | This is ridiculous! | |
| [04:39] | So, a stranger walks in off the street, | |
| [04:42] | and you’re just going to hand her | |
| [04:43] | the biggest drum solo of the year? | |
| [04:45] | Look, man, I know you don’t know me, | |
| [04:46] | but I promise you, I got more beats | |
| [04:48] | than a farmer’s market. | |
| [04:49] | Ha ha! You know, when beets are in season. | |
| [04:53] | Thank you. | |
| [04:55] | Oh, and you know what I got? | |
| [04:57] | The rulebook. | |
| [04:59] | According to section five, subsection A | |
| [05:02] | of the Drumline Charter Bylaws, | |
| [05:04] | I hereby invoke my right to a drum-off! | |
| [05:06] | – Come on, Elliot… – I invoke! | |
| [05:08] | – I invoke! – All right. | |
| [05:10] | All right, fine, if it’ll shut you up. | |
| [05:12] | Cassandra, Elliot, it’s a drum-off! | |
| [05:52] | Oh, ho! Cassandra, you got the solo! | |
| [05:57] | But that’s not fair! | |
| [05:58] | It’s okay, Elliot, | |
| [05:59] | look, you can play the solo, too, okay? | |
| [06:01] | Just “so low” nobody can hear you. | |
| [06:07] | Thank you again. | |
| [06:17] | I don’t know why they said this was a chick flick. | |
| [06:20] | There’s a lot in it for dudes to enjoy, too. | |
| [06:24] | What’re you doing? | |
| [06:25] | Oh, um, I was watching a war movie, | |
| [06:28] | The Guns of, uh… what do you want? | |
| [06:34] | – Where’s KC? – On a mission. | |
| [06:36] | What? No! She’s supposed to help me with my college essay! | |
| [06:39] | The deadline for the Fashion Institute of Technology is in… | |
| [06:42] | five hours. | |
| [06:44] | Good thing you didn’t wait till the last minute. | |
| [06:46] | Come on, this is not funny. | |
| [06:48] | My essay needs to be as strong as it can be. | |
| [06:50] | All right, fine, I’ll help you. | |
| [06:52] | Oh, thank you. | |
| [06:56] | “Dear Fashion Institute of Technology, | |
| [06:58] | Please let me in. | |
| [07:00] | Sincerely, Marisa Miller.” | |
| [07:03] | I’m bad, right? | |
| [07:05] | No, not bad. Terrible. | |
| [07:07] | This isn’t an essay. | |
| [07:09] | Plus, you spelled “Marisa” wrong. | |
| [07:11] | Okay, whatever. I know it stinks. | |
| [07:14] | I don’t know what else to write about. | |
| [07:17] | Try writing about your life. | |
| [07:19] | Please, what am I supposed to say? | |
| [07:21] | That I woke up a few months before graduation | |
| [07:23] | and realized that I’d actually be good at design | |
| [07:25] | because my designs are really, really good, | |
| [07:27] | That they should accept me into this prestigious school, | |
| [07:30] | despite the fact that I failed most of my classes, | |
| [07:32] | but it was only because I didn’t really care about them. | |
| [07:34] | But I know I would be a success at F.I.T. | |
| [07:36] | because I’m actually really passionate about this | |
| [07:39] | and desperately want to learn about fashion and design! | |
| [07:42] | Yeah, that works. | |
| [07:46] | You’re right, it does! | |
| [07:48] | Hey, get me one of those wrighty thingies. | |
| [07:51] | Uh, you mean a laptop? | |
| [07:53] | Yeah, yeah, one of those. | |
| [07:58] | Okay, now that you’ve secured at prime spot | |
| [08:01] | next to Parker at the library renaming ceremony, | |
| [08:04] | all you gotta do is protect him, | |
| [08:05] | and pretend to play the drums. | |
| [08:09] | Really, Dad? You’re still on that? | |
| [08:11] | Look, just being honest, okay, you can not pass | |
| [08:13] | for a college student anymore. | |
| [08:15] | Maybe if I shaved a little… | |
| [08:17] | Shaved off 20 years? | |
| [08:19] | I get it, KC, I’m older, | |
| [08:21] | but I can still play. | |
| [08:22] | There was a reason they called me Sticks back in college. | |
| [08:25] | Yeah, wasn’t it because you ate a lot of fried mozzarella? | |
| [08:27] | Okay, there were two reasons. | |
| [08:29] | You know what? I’m gonna make sure | |
| [08:31] | all your surveillance cameras are in place. | |
| [08:33] | Maybe you should try bashing that drum | |
| [08:35] | instead of your dear old dad. | |
| [08:39] | Oh, uh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! | |
| [08:43] | Excuse me. You can’t be on the quad | |
| [08:45] | without a proper wristband. | |
| [08:47] | They didn’t give me one, | |
| [08:48] | but it’s cool… I’m with the drumline. | |
| [08:50] | Oh! Well, in that case, yeah, let me just slap one on ya. | |
| [08:55] | – Ahh…! – Yeah, that’s right. | |
| [08:58] | I’m Barney Feffer, Campus Security, Part-Time Division… | |
| [09:04] | and you are under campus arrest. | |
| [09:06] | – For what? – Suspicion… | |
| [09:09] | of being suspicious. | |
| [09:17] | Okay, look, I think you’ve made a mistake. | |
| [09:20] | As I’ve said, see? Check my visitor’s pass. | |
| [09:23] | Student of Georgetown, Cassandra Bailey, right there. | |
| [09:25] | No, you are a liar! | |
| [09:29] | Because according to my research, | |
| [09:31] | the only Cassandra Bailey who ever attended Georgetown | |
| [09:34] | died in 1914 of the rickets. | |
| [09:37] | Oh, you know, you look pretty good | |
| [09:39] | for a 100-year-old corpse. | |
| [09:42] | Okay, look, you know what, | |
| [09:43] | I should not be telling you this… | |
| [09:46] | but I’m an undercover police officer | |
| [09:48] | sent here to protect the rich guy | |
| [09:49] | who gave all the money to the library. | |
| [09:51] | Oh, that’s interesting! | |
| [09:53] | You don’t look or feel like a rug, | |
| [09:56] | so why you gotta lie like one? | |
| [09:59] | Hmm, you know, you don’t look or feel like a security guard, | |
| [10:03] | yet here we are! | |
| [10:06] | I can prove it to you, okay? | |
| [10:08] | I have these special drum sticks in my backpack, | |
| [10:11] | that were given to me | |
| [10:13] | by the Police Advance Technical Department, | |
| [10:18] | Musical Division. | |
| [10:22] | Do I look stupid to you? | |
| [10:24] | You really want me to answer that question? | |
| [10:26] | No. | |
| [10:28] | Just try them out, okay? They’re right there in my backpack. | |
| [10:31] | Anyone who plays with them can play like a pro. | |
| [10:39] | Wow! | |
| [10:42] | Oh, well, I mean, color me embarrassed. | |
| [10:45] | I am so sorry, officer. | |
| [10:48] | Yeah, it’s no problem. | |
| [10:50] | Yeah, hey, but I guess that means | |
| [10:53] | that we’re working the case together. | |
| [10:55] | Oh, well, if by “working the case together” | |
| [10:57] | you mean going our separate ways | |
| [10:59] | and pretending we never met, then yeah, bingo! | |
| [11:00] | No! No, no, no, no, no! | |
| [11:02] | Please. This is my last shot | |
| [11:04] | to become a full-time security officer. | |
| [11:07] | I mean, right now, my badge, it’s just a sticker. | |
| [11:12] | It’s just a sticker… | |
| [11:13] | Okay. Okay, okay, you know what, | |
| [11:15] | um, how about you start | |
| [11:16] | by securing the perimeter of the campus. | |
| [11:18] | I am on it! | |
| [11:20] | Attention all units! | Attention all units! |
| [11:23] | This is Part-Time Security Officer Feffer | |
| [11:27] | calling for a complete campus lockdown! | |
| [11:29] | Okay, first, that is a bit of an overreaction, | |
| [11:32] | and secondly, that’s not connected to anything. | |
| [11:37] | Oh! No wonder no one ever answers me back. | |
| [11:44] | I don’t know. | |
| [11:46] | I think it’s perfect. | |
| [11:48] | I would just probably add | |
| [11:49] | a few of those things that we talked about. | |
| [11:51] | Right. Commas! | |
| [11:54] | I’d say this is a great essay. | |
| [11:57] | It’s real, it’s from the heart, | |
| [12:00] | it’s funny, and it’s you. | |
| [12:03] | The Fashion Institute’s gonna love it. | |
| [12:06] | Thank you so much, Ernie. | |
| [12:08] | Honestly, like, I couldn’t have done this without you. | |
| [12:10] | It was my pleasure. | |
| [12:15] | Oh, okay, yeah! | |
| [12:16] | I’m gonna finish this one at home. | |
| [12:18] | Good idea. Go home. | |
| [12:19] | All right, I-I’ll see you later. | |
| [12:20] | – Okay. – Bye. | |
| [12:23] | – I’m going now! – Please do! | |
| [12:24] | – Okay! – Hey, wait, that’s my laptop! | |
| [12:28] | Okay… | |
| [12:33] | All right, everybody, get in formation. | |
| [12:35] | We’re gonna start with the solos. | |
| [12:37] | Wait, wait, wait, I can’t find my sticks. | |
| [12:38] | Why don’t you use mine? | |
| [12:40] | You’re taking everything else from me. | |
| [12:43] | No, I have to use mine! | |
| [12:44] | Um, ’cause that’s gross. | |
| [12:46] | I mean, would you use somebody else’s toothbrush? | |
| [12:49] | Are you planning on putting them in your mouth? | |
| [12:50] | Maybe. You don’t know my routine. | |
| [12:54] | Start us off. Now. | |
| [12:58] | One, two, three, four. | |
| [13:00] | Five, six, seven, eight! | |
| [13:02] | – Cassandra! – What? | |
| [13:04] | Does this group go with, like, prime numbers | |
| [13:06] | or something? If so, no problem. | |
| [13:08] | Two, three, five, seven… | |
| [13:09] | Would you please play?! | |
| [13:12] | Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. For sure. Gotcha. | |
| [13:15] | Here we go. Solo. | |
| [13:17] | Ahem. | |
| [13:30] | Maybe your drumming would sound better | |
| [13:32] | if you did put the sticks in your mouth. | |
| [13:34] | Okay, Elliot, relax. | |
| [13:37] | It was just a warm-up, | |
| [13:38] | just a little bit of a warm-up. | |
| [13:40] | Let’s get into this… | |
| [13:44] | Five, six, seven. One, two, three. | |
| [13:46] | Okay. Ahem! Mm! | |
| [14:02] | Come on, Captain! | |
| [14:04] | She’s clearly choking! | |
| [14:06] | Give me back my solo! | |
| [14:08] | You got it, Elliot. You can go now. | |
| [14:10] | Oh, man. | |
| [14:24] | You too, Cymbals? | |
| [14:25] | Thought we were friends. | |
| [14:36] | Oh, Officer Bailey! Officer Bailey! | |
| [14:41] | Officer Bailey! | |
| [14:43] | Shh! What? W-What? What is it? | |
| [14:46] | I found something! | |
| [14:47] | Well, clearly it wasn’t antiperspirant, | |
| [14:49] | ’cause you’re drenched in sweat. | |
| [14:50] | No, I found your… I found… | |
| [14:52] | I found your… | |
| [14:54] | Okay, I need you to stop saying, “I found your,” | |
| [14:57] | – and tell me what you found. – I found your sticks. | |
| [14:59] | Oh! My sticks! Okay, thank you. | |
| [15:02] | Wait, were did you find these? | |
| [15:04] | In that drummer guy Elliot’s locker. | |
| [15:06] | You know, he seemed suspicious to me, | |
| [15:08] | so I invaded his privacy, | |
| [15:09] | which I assumed was my right | |
| [15:12] | when you deputized me. | |
| [15:15] | Of course, no, no, no. Elliot is the threat. | |
| [15:18] | That’s why he wanted the solo so bad. | |
| [15:20] | He’s trying to get close to Parker at the dedication ceremony. | |
| [15:23] | So, what do I do next? | |
| [15:28] | Okay, listen carefully, all right? | |
| [15:30] | Hold on. | |
| [15:32] | Okay. I’m listening. | |
| [15:37] | I want you to go… | |
| [15:39] | Go. | |
| [15:40] | …home. | |
| [15:42] | Hom… Wait a minute! | |
| [15:45] | It seems like you’re trying to get rid of me. | |
| [15:47] | I want to help! I’m the one who found the drum sticks. | |
| [15:51] | Okay. Okay. I guess another set of eyes couldn’t hurt. | |
| [15:55] | You get full clearance. | |
| [15:57] | Yes! Full clearance. Oh! | |
| [16:01] | I haven’t been fully cleared since the arson investigation. | |
| [16:07] | Listen here, Barney, don’t make me rethink this. | |
| [16:13] | – Hey, hey, hey. – What do you want now? | |
| [16:15] | I want my drum solo back. | |
| [16:22] | Too late. | |
| [16:25] | Yeah, well, I hereby invoke section five, subsection A… | |
| [16:28] | According to the amendment bylaws enacted in 1997, | |
| [16:31] | a formal petition must be presented | |
| [16:32] | in advance, for a second drum-off. | |
| [16:34] | Per the 2004 addendum to that amendment, | |
| [16:38] | it clearly states that if there are extenuating circumstances… | |
| [16:41] | You don’t know what you’re talking about! | |
| [16:43] | Okay, enough! Enough! | |
| [16:45] | Two weeks! | |
| [16:47] | I have two weeks of school left, | |
| [16:49] | and you’re ruining it! | |
| [16:53] | So you’ll both just do the solo! | |
| [16:55] | You’ll both stand on either side of Parker. | |
| [16:57] | – Got it? – Nuh, I got it. | |
| [16:59] | Is that cool with you, Elliot? Does it ruin your little plan? | |
| [17:01] | My only plan is to drum my butt off at Parker’s dedication ceremony. | |
| [17:04] | Don’t get in my way. | |
| [17:07] | I will be in your way… | |
| [17:10] | except for the parts where I choreographed | |
| [17:12] | to be out of your way. | |
| [17:14] | Then I won’t be. | |
| [17:17] | Or will I? | |
| [17:25] | Um, hey Bryan. | |
| [17:27] | Hey, KC! | |
| [17:28] | I’m at this thing my dad dragged me to, | |
| [17:31] | but I’ll be free in time for our movie. | |
| [17:33] | What movie? | |
| [17:34] | The movie we said we were going to tonight. | |
| [17:38] | The movie I already bought tickets for! | |
| [17:43] | Uh, right. Right, right, right. | |
| [17:45] | Yeah, of course, that movie. | |
| [17:47] | Um, about that. I can’t go. | |
| [17:50] | You’re blowing me off? | |
| [17:51] | No, no. I’m not blowing you off. | |
| [17:53] | I’m just canceling at the last minute. | |
| [17:56] | Okay, that is the very definition of blowing someone off. | |
| [18:00] | No, see, listen, you didn’t let me finish, okay? | |
| [18:03] | I can’t go tonight because my grandma is not well. | |
| [18:08] | Yeah, have you ever heard of acute necrotizing ulcerative gingivitis? | |
| [18:15] | Oh. No, I haven’t. | |
| [18:17] | Then that’s what she has. | |
| [18:19] | I-I am so sorry. | |
| [18:22] | Go take care of your grandma. | |
| [18:24] | – Thank you. – I hope she feels better. | |
| [18:26] | Thank you. | |
| [18:37] | Heyyy! | |
| [18:38] | How’s it going? | |
| [18:40] | Uh, did you get your application in? | |
| [18:42] | I did! I did! Thank you! | |
| [18:44] | Thank you so much for your help. | |
| [18:46] | It was my pleasure. | |
| [18:47] | So we’re not gonna talk about what happened! | |
| [18:48] | – Works for me. – Oh, me too! | |
| [18:50] | – See you later. – Ah, see you. | |
| [18:54] | Okay, we clearly need to talk about what’s happening. | |
| [18:58] | Um, what is going on? | |
| [19:01] | I mean, I barely like you, | |
| [19:03] | and I certainly don’t “like you, like you.” | |
| [19:05] | And I feel the same way about you… times ten! | |
| [19:10] | So what is going on here? | |
| [19:11] | I don’t know. I don’t know. | |
| [19:14] | Um, maybe it’s because you’re really passionate | |
| [19:19] | about going to this school, | |
| [19:21] | and somehow that passion | |
| [19:24] | spilled over into your appreciation? | |
| [19:27] | Yes! Yes! My passion | |
| [19:30] | spilled over into my appreciation, | |
| [19:32] | and onto your lips! | |
| [19:34] | That makes perfect sense. | |
| [19:35] | – It was nothing! – Less than nothing. | |
| [19:37] | I’m so glad we cleared that up! | |
| [19:38] | Me too! | |
| [19:50] | Congratulations to our benefactor | |
| [19:52] | and to the man we’re celebrating here today, | |
| [19:55] | Mr., uh, Henry Parker! | |
| [20:01] | And now, in a special salute, | |
| [20:03] | the American University Drumline! | |
| [21:04] | I know you stole my sticks and put them in your locker. | |
| [21:07] | What? What, locker, what are you, in high school? | |
| [21:11] | I don’t have a locker. | |
| [21:12] | Oh. Yeah, right, that makes sense. | |
| [21:15] | Wait, if it wasn’t you, then… | |
| [21:22] | Barney Feffer. | |
| [21:24] | Congratulations! I’m giving you your solo back! | |
| [21:27] | It was never yours to give! | |
| [21:30] | Drumline sounds amazing. | |
| [21:32] | Just wish we could see it better. | |
| [21:36] | Ooh! | |
| [21:38] | So, you played stupid and I fell for it. | |
| [21:40] | Played stupid, or am stupid? | |
| [21:43] | Either way, you fell for it. | |
| [21:46] | Well, what’s your beef with Parker? | |
| [21:48] | It all started 35 years ago at this very university. | |
| [21:52] | Parker and I were assigned the same dorm room. | |
| [21:56] | I distinctly called dibs on the top bunk, but Parker! | |
| [21:59] | Okay. Okay. I’ve lost interest. | |
| [22:01] | Okay, I’m taking you in. Let’s go. | |
| [22:03] | Yeow! | |
| [22:19] | Nice drum roll, Barney. | |
| [22:40] | Oh, come on. | |
| [22:44] | Well, look at that, Barney. | |
| [22:45] | You just got upgraded to maximum security. | |
| [22:51] | Wow, Dad, that was amazing. | |
| [22:53] | I’m so glad that we came. | |
| [22:58] | KC? What are you doing here? | |
| [23:05] | Rob, your name’s on TV! |