| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:00] | Synced and corrected by Katniss Everdeen. www.MY-SUBS.com | |
| [00:00] | WWW.MY-SUBS.COM | |
| [00:05] | I can’t find my French book anywhere. | |
| [00:08] | Probably because you take Spanish. | |
| [00:11] | That explains it. | |
| [00:15] | Don’t look now. Here comes Alexis. | |
| [00:17] | I can’t stand that girl. | |
| [00:19] | – Hi, KC. – Hey, girl. | |
| [00:22] | So… did you hear? | |
| [00:24] | The school’s top student is being interviewed by | |
| [00:27] | Scholastic Accomplishments Quarterly. | |
| [00:29] | Scholastic Accomplishments Quarterly? | |
| [00:31] | That is, like, the quarterly publication for scholastic accomplishments. | |
| [00:34] | I have been dying to get that interview. | |
| [00:36] | Thank you for the heads up. | |
| [00:37] | Ooh, this is awkward. | |
| [00:40] | They’re actually interviewing me. | |
| [00:42] | Sorry. Thought you knew. | |
| [00:48] | Wait, so you just click-clacked all the way over here to rub it in her face? | |
| [00:52] | Why can’t you just post your brags online like everyone else? | |
| [00:57] | Let me just get this straight. | |
| [00:59] | Um, they decided to interview the student | |
| [01:01] | with the second-highest GPS in the school? | |
| [01:03] | No, the first. | |
| [01:04] | Turns out I’m actually the smartest student in the entire DC-Metro area. | |
| [01:08] | Well, if that were true, you would know | |
| [01:11] | that I am the smartest student in the entire DC-Metro area. | |
| [01:15] | Tell it to Scholastic Accomplishments Quarterly. | |
| [01:18] | Oh, that’s right. | |
| [01:19] | They don’t wanna talk to you. | |
| [01:25] | Well, are you sure you’re not being interviewed by | |
| [01:28] | Obnoxious Accomplishments Quarterly? | |
| [01:31] | Why do you let her get to you like that? | |
| [01:33] | She’s been driving you crazy since we were little kids. | |
| [01:35] | I have my reasons. | |
| [01:40] | Nice turkey, KC. | |
| [01:41] | – Thanks, Alexis. – Just not as nice as mine. | |
| [01:46] | Are those real feathers? | |
| [01:48] | Mm-hmm. | |
| [01:49] | My boa. | |
| [01:52] | I’ve been de-plumed. | |
| [01:56] | Nobody plucks my best friend’s feathers. | |
| [01:59] | You’re going down. | |
| [02:03] | I’m not letting her get away with this. | |
| [02:05] | I’m going to the principal, because I know I have a higher GPA than her, | |
| [02:07] | and I’m getting that interview. | |
| [02:09] | Are you sure you wanna be in the nerd report? | |
| [02:11] | If you want a social life, the answer is no. | |
| [02:15] | Okay. Good-bye to you, too. | |
| [02:19] | I swear, it’s like no one listens to me. | |
| [02:20] | Every time I have something to say… | |
| [03:10] | I keep it undercover. | |
| [03:12] | I keep it undercover. | |
| [03:17] | So I reviewed my transcript with the principal, | |
| [03:20] | and it turns out I do have a higher GPA than she does. | |
| [03:23] | So I will be meeting with a reporter from the magazine tomorrow. | |
| [03:26] | I was right. | |
| [03:28] | May I remind you, we’re spies. | |
| [03:30] | We go undercover, not on the cover. | |
| [03:33] | You can’t do that interview. | |
| [03:34] | Ernie, I earned it, okay? | |
| [03:36] | I’m not gonna give it up. | |
| [03:38] | You should know better than anyone. | |
| [03:39] | There should be more to life than just being a spy. | |
| [03:41] | School means a lot to me, and I worked hard, | |
| [03:44] | and I think I deserve to have my work recognized. | |
| [03:46] | The Organization will never allow it. | |
| [03:48] | The Organization will never find out, because you will keep your mouth shut. | |
| [03:52] | Look, Mom and Dad are away on a mission, | |
| [03:55] | so I’m gonna have to step into their roles for a second. | |
| [04:02] | I know how bad you want this, buddy. | |
| [04:05] | And I know how hard you’ve worked. | |
| [04:07] | I do. | |
| [04:09] | But you’ve gotta cancel that interview. | |
| [04:11] | Okay, fine. I will. | |
| [04:14] | Proud of ya. | |
| [04:15] | Glad we had this talk, princess. | |
| [04:17] | Okay, all right, this is weird. | |
| [04:28] | C.W. Barnes, Scholastic Accomplishments Quarterly. | |
| [04:31] | Oh. KC Cooper, scholastic accomplishments constantly. | |
| [04:36] | I have to tell you, I’m very excited about this interview. | |
| [04:38] | I have read every issue of your magazine. | |
| [04:41] | Yes. I am the one. | |
| [04:45] | I know what you did. | |
| [04:47] | And you know what you did. | |
| [04:52] | Well, I’m excited, too. | |
| [04:54] | I think these next two days are gonna be a lot of fun. | |
| [04:56] | Two days? | |
| [04:58] | That seems like a lot of time for just a little blurb, | |
| [05:02] | unless you spend the first day and a half looking for a pen. | |
| [05:04] | Blurb? Uh, I don’t think so. | |
| [05:06] | I wanna do an in-depth article, the likes of which they have never seen before. | |
| [05:11] | For the next 48 hours, I’m gonna be your shadow. | |
| [05:15] | Oh, really? | |
| [05:17] | Yes. I’m gonna find out where you go, what you do, and who you do it with. | |
| [05:22] | I’m gonna uncover all of your deepest, darkest secrets. | |
| [05:24] | I’m gonna find out everything there is to know about KC Cooper. | |
| [05:29] | Well, um, the first thing you should know is that KC Cooper is a fraud. | |
| [05:36] | Yeah, I am a fraud. | |
| [05:39] | A lyin’, stinkin’, cheatin’ fraud, and you cannot have me in your magazine. | |
| [05:43] | I don’t understand. | |
| [05:45] | Neither do I. I don’t understand anything. | |
| [05:47] | In fact, I don’t even understand what the word understand means | |
| [05:50] | which is why I cheat, all the time, off of this young lady here. | |
| [05:55] | This much more smarter than me lady. | |
| [05:58] | That’s not even correct English, | |
| [06:00] | but I don’t even know how to speak it, ’cause I’m dumb. | |
| [06:03] | C.W., this is the person that you need to be talking to. | |
| [06:06] | Alexis, she is the… ahem… | |
| [06:09] | smartest person in our class. | |
| [06:12] | In The entire DC-Metro area. | |
| [06:24] | Take it easy. The drive to a mission shouldn’t be the most dangerous part. | |
| [06:30] | I think someone’s following us. | |
| [06:31] | I promise, just like on all your social media, no one is following you. | |
| [06:37] | Then I guess I’m just upset about that interview. | |
| [06:40] | That reporter really got in my head. | |
| [06:41] | The reporter? The reporter?! | |
| [06:44] | You mean the reporter I told you not to talk to? | |
| [06:46] | That reporter? | |
| [06:48] | Why do you always think you know better than me? | |
| [06:50] | Because 99.999% of the time, I do know better than you. | |
| [06:55] | I’m telling you, someone is tailing us. | |
| [06:57] | You’re paranoid. Relax. | |
| [06:58] | – You relax. – I am relaxed. | |
| [07:03] | Can you relax a little quieter? | |
| [07:09] | You need to intercept the Other Side agent | |
| [07:11] | before he can make the drop. | |
| [07:13] | We need that flash drive. | |
| [07:15] | Wait. Sh. | |
| [07:16] | – I think I’ve got a tail. – This again? | |
| [07:19] | The targets are six blocks away. | |
| [07:21] | If you’ve got company, they’re not on the guest list. | |
| [07:24] | You would know all about not being on a guest list, wouldn’t you? | |
| [07:27] | And by the way, I have 112 followers. | |
| [07:31] | One more word and you’re down to 111. | |
| [07:34] | I hear footsteps. Ernie, I’m right about this. | |
| [07:37] | – Someone is following me. – Yes, KC, we know. | |
| [07:39] | You’re always right. Now get outta there. | |
| [07:45] | Yeah, that’s right. | |
| [07:46] | Eat dirt, scuzzball. | |
| [07:47] | You are dealing with the youngest | |
| [07:49] | senior junior secret agent in the Organization. | |
| [07:56] | Can I quote you on that, KC? | |
| [08:06] | What were you saying about being the youngest junior secret what? | |
| [08:10] | Wow. | |
| [08:12] | You must’ve hit the ground pretty hard, | |
| [08:14] | because, uh, I don’t know what you’re talking about, or why you’re even here. | |
| [08:19] | Call it reporter’s intuition, but you were acting weird. | |
| [08:22] | I thought there was more to the story. | |
| [08:24] | Now I am sure of it. | |
| [08:25] | Get rid of him. | |
| [08:27] | The targets are in range. | |
| [08:28] | Uh, you know what? Let’s talk later. | |
| [08:31] | This isn’t really a safe place. | |
| [08:32] | Oh, so it’s safe for you, but not for me. | |
| [08:36] | Now I’m really intrigued. | |
| [08:38] | Okay, look out. | |
| [08:42] | Sweet dreams. | |
| [08:56] | Sorry, C-Dubs. | |
| [09:06] | I’ll take that flash drive. | |
| [09:08] | Thank you very much. | |
| [09:09] | All right, C-Dubs. | |
| [09:11] | Let’s roll. | |
| [09:18] | Okay, we’ll go on three, all right? | |
| [09:19] | One, two… | |
| [09:26] | Three. | |
| [09:28] | I said we go on three. | |
| [09:30] | That would be the number after two. | |
| [09:32] | You should’ve listened to me. | |
| [09:34] | I told you not to mess around with this interview. | |
| [09:36] | I told you, I told you, I told you. | |
| [09:38] | Will you stop telling me you told me and help me get him in here? | |
| [09:41] | Ready? On three. | |
| [09:44] | One, two, three. | |
| [09:50] | What? I said three. | |
| [09:52] | I know. You got all up in my head. | |
| [09:55] | Just get in the van, please. | |
| [10:06] | Can you just admit for once you wouldn’t be in this situation | |
| [10:10] | if you had done what I told you?! | |
| [10:12] | He wouldn’t know you exist, and he definitely wouldn’t have followed you | |
| [10:15] | on your top-secret mission. | |
| [10:18] | Now, what do you suggest we do with this guy when he wakes up? | |
| [10:44] | So up until I was, I don’t know, three years old, I thought it was A-B-Z’s. | |
| [10:49] | Oh, man, kids can be so dumb. | |
| [10:52] | Even the really smart ones. | |
| [10:54] | Um… what are we doing here? | |
| [10:57] | Apparently putting you to sleep. | |
| [10:59] | Uh, no, no. | |
| [11:01] | No, wait, I followed you. | |
| [11:03] | No, you came up to me earlier and asked if we could meet here for the interview | |
| [11:06] | and then you insisted on getting the Hawaiian pizza, | |
| [11:09] | which you will pay the price for later | |
| [11:11] | when it feels like you’ve been slammed up against a van. | |
| [11:13] | It’ll make sense, trust me. | |
| [11:16] | Uh, well, I don’t remember any of that, | |
| [11:19] | but I guess we should start the interview. | |
| [11:23] | Or continue it. | |
| [11:25] | Yeah, sure. Go ahead. | |
| [11:27] | Ask away. I am an open book. | |
| [11:29] | I have no secrets whatsoever. | |
| [11:31] | So tell me, did you always wanna be a journalist? | |
| [11:34] | Absolutely. | |
| [11:37] | When I was five, I did my first investigative report. | |
| [11:41] | Lap of luxury or knees of disease?” | |
| [11:45] | Mmm, interesting. Please go on. | |
| [11:52] | You should’ve seen it. I played him like a fiddle. | |
| [11:55] | If there’s one thing I learned from being friends with you, | |
| [11:58] | it’s that people love to talk about themselves. | |
| [11:59] | So I managed to finish the interview without giving up any real information, | |
| [12:04] | and I still get the recognition I deserve. | |
| [12:07] | Take that, Alexis. | |
| [12:09] | Uh, I saw that. | |
| [12:12] | – Saw what? – You rolled your eyes. | |
| [12:14] | Well, I had to roll them, or else I would fall asleep. | |
| [12:17] | How many times are we gonna talk about this Alexis and Who Cares quarterly? | |
| [12:22] | Could you not mock and criticize me for once in your life? | |
| [12:24] | When have I ever criticized you? | |
| [12:26] | I don’t know. Our entire friendship. | |
| [12:28] | Where is the sparkly unicorn vest I laid out for you? | |
| [12:33] | You cannot wear flannel on Picture Day. | |
| [12:35] | Why? It never goes out of style. | |
| [12:38] | Because it’s never been in style. You can’t wear that. | |
| [12:41] | Not only will I wear flannel today. | |
| [12:44] | I will wear flannel every day for the rest of my life. | |
| [12:47] | What about when you get married? | |
| [12:48] | Flannel veil. | |
| [12:51] | Oh, so you’re blaming your lack of style on me? | |
| [12:54] | – Is that what this is about? – I’m stylish. | |
| [12:57] | Ish. | |
| [12:59] | Look, this is about you supporting me, which apparently is just too much to ask. | |
| [13:02] | – KC. – I don’t wanna fight. | |
| [13:04] | I’m just kind of stressed out because of this interview, but you know what? | |
| [13:08] | At least it’s over. | |
| [13:10] | KC, there you are. I wanna set up a time to interview your parents. | |
| [13:13] | Uh, what do you mean by parents? | |
| [13:15] | I mean the people who raised you. | |
| [13:19] | Oh, that’s impossible, ’cause my dad’s out of town. | |
| [13:22] | Then I can wait till he gets back. | |
| [13:23] | He’s an astronaut. | |
| [13:27] | It could be months. | |
| [13:29] | Then your mom. | |
| [13:30] | She has outta-house-aphobia. | |
| [13:33] | That is the fear of being out of the house. | |
| [13:38] | Well, then, I will come to her. | |
| [13:40] | All right? See you this afternoon. | |
| [13:42] | Okay. | |
| [13:44] | Outta-house-aphobia? | |
| [13:48] | How are you the smartest person in our school? | |
| [13:57] | Hello. Anybody home? Mrs. Cooper? | |
| [13:59] | – Hello. – Coming. | |
| [14:04] | Hello, hello, hello. | |
| [14:07] | I am Kira Cooper, KC’s mother. | |
| [14:09] | How ya feelin’? What’s the dealie? | |
| [14:11] | Whazzup?! | |
| [14:13] | Oh, I’m sorry. I know that is old-timey expressions. | |
| [14:16] | How do you young kids say it nowadays? | |
| [14:18] | Uh… hi. | |
| [14:20] | You kids and your crazy slang. | |
| [14:22] | Come on. | |
| [14:24] | It’s nice to meet you, Mrs. Cooper. | |
| [14:27] | And can I just say, you look so young to have a teenage daughter. | |
| [14:30] | You know what? The secret is clean living. | |
| [14:33] | And lots and lots and lots of makeup. | |
| [14:36] | I mean, under here, I am an old hag. | |
| [14:39] | So you’re doing a little article about my baby? | |
| [14:41] | Yes. | |
| [14:44] | Ernie! | |
| [14:46] | What are you doing here? | |
| [14:47] | I live here. | |
| [14:50] | Well, don’t just stand there, my son. | |
| [14:53] | Your what?! | |
| [14:55] | Give your mama some sugar. Come here now. | |
| [14:59] | I am this close to getting my article. | |
| [15:01] | You better not mess it up for me. | |
| [15:03] | Oh! Look at my little boy. | |
| [15:05] | All right, so where were we? | |
| [15:07] | We were waiting for KC. | |
| [15:09] | We don’t have to wait for her; she’s boring. | |
| [15:11] | I think she should be here. | |
| [15:13] | Well, you know what? | |
| [15:15] | She’s actually at NASA waiting for her father. | |
| [15:17] | Could be months. | |
| [15:20] | Actually, Mother, KC is back. | |
| [15:22] | She’s right upstairs. | |
| [15:24] | KC always has to be right… upstairs. | |
| [15:29] | You’re mistaken, dear. | |
| [15:31] | Don’t forget, you’re still not too old to get a little spanking. | |
| [15:34] | Nope. She just texted me. | |
| [15:36] | Should I text her and tell her to come on down? | |
| [15:38] | You know what? | |
| [15:40] | That won’t be necessary. I will be right back. | |
| [15:43] | With KC? | |
| [15:44] | Yes, with KC. | |
| [15:46] | I mean, you hope for two geniuses, but this one is just not that bright. | |
| [15:59] | KC’s right upstairs. | |
| [16:00] | He is lucky that I am not his mother. | |
| [16:14] | Oh, hey, C.W. | |
| [16:15] | My mom said you needed me. What’s up? | |
| [16:17] | I need both of you actually. | |
| [16:18] | Oh, well, she’s upstairs, and I only have a few minutes, you know. | |
| [16:22] | So much homework, so little time. | |
| [16:24] | Go ahead. Ask away. | |
| [16:26] | Uh, okay. | |
| [16:28] | Would you say you inherited your work ethic from your parents? | |
| [16:30] | Oh, yeah, absolutely. | |
| [16:32] | My parents have always encouraged me to be the best I can be. | |
| [16:35] | I’m sure my mom would agree. | |
| [16:37] | But why leave it to chance? | |
| [16:39] | Why not go get her? | |
| [16:43] | I’m sure it’ll be nice for C.W. to talk to both of you at the same time. | |
| [16:47] | Maybe even take a picture of both of you. | |
| [16:49] | – Together. – That would be great. | |
| [16:53] | Mmm, wouldn’t it? I’ll be right back. | |
| [17:05] | Oh, I’m sorry I’m late. | |
| [17:07] | I was at… plastic surgery. | |
| [17:12] | Which is why I look so young. | |
| [17:15] | But don’t put that in your article. | |
| [17:17] | That is off the record, mister. | |
| [17:21] | Who’s this? | |
| [17:22] | Oh, I’m KC’s mother. | |
| [17:27] | Then who’s that? | |
| [17:29] | KC’s other mother. | |
| [17:33] | KC has two moms? | |
| [17:36] | Looks like it. | |
| [17:46] | I didn’t realize KC had two moms. | |
| [17:49] | Neither did she. | |
| [17:53] | Well, it’s not like when I was a teenager. | |
| [17:56] | There’s lots of ways to make a family nowadays. | |
| [18:02] | Can I talk to you outside for a second? | |
| [18:04] | This one is so pushy. | |
| [18:11] | One second. | |
| [18:13] | What the heck do you think you’re doing? | |
| [18:15] | Why would you come over here and pretend to be my mother? | |
| [18:16] | You told me I don’t support you, so I came to support you. | |
| [18:20] | That’s actually really sweet. Thank you. | |
| [18:23] | Now get outta here before you ruin everything. | |
| [18:27] | I’m sorry. Just to clarify, KC lives here with you two? | |
| [18:31] | – Her moms? – Yeah, so? | |
| [18:33] | Just a little surprised. | |
| [18:34] | Why? ‘Cause I’m white? | |
| [18:37] | No. No. | |
| [18:39] | Because my background information says KC lives here with her mom and her dad. | |
| [18:43] | A Craig Cooper? | |
| [18:45] | The guy that’s in all the family photos inside while you aren’t in any of them. | |
| [18:49] | There’s a simple explanation for all of that. | |
| [18:51] | I’m a vampire. | |
| [19:00] | A vampire? | |
| [19:02] | You, a vampire? | |
| [19:05] | Well, I know it’s not as original as having outta-house-aphobia | |
| [19:09] | while your father is stuck in space, | |
| [19:12] | but then again, I’m not the smartest girl in school | |
| [19:15] | – like you. – Just help me drag him inside. | |
| [19:23] | I can’t believe it. | |
| [19:25] | You actually asked me to help you with something. | |
| [19:26] | Excuse me, but what is that supposed to mean? | |
| [19:29] | It means you never want anyone’s help | |
| [19:31] | because you have to have everything your way. | |
| [19:32] | Exactly. | |
| [19:35] | – Why am I on the floor? – Hey, let me help you up. | |
| [19:41] | Your problem is you always have to be right. | |
| [19:44] | Now we’re having a conversation. | |
| [19:46] | Why is everybody ganging up on me? | |
| [19:48] | So you don’t like that we’re challenging you? | |
| [19:50] | Probably because you’re not used to it because you always have to be right. | |
| [19:54] | And you always have to be the best… the best student, the best athlete, | |
| [19:58] | – the best fake mom. – Okay, guys, this is crazy. | |
| [20:00] | Is it? You couldn’t let Alexis be in the magazine | |
| [20:03] | because you couldn’t stand the idea of people thinking she’s better than you. | |
| [20:06] | Because she’s not. | |
| [20:12] | I have a teeny, tiny, slightly higher GPA than she does. | |
| [20:15] | I don’t always have to be the best. | |
| [20:16] | It’s just that… | |
| [20:17] | You usually are? | |
| [20:19] | Hey, you said it, I didn’t. | |
| [20:21] | I really am confused. | |
| [20:24] | I don’t know where all this is suddenly coming from. | |
| [20:25] | – Suddenly?! – This has been going on forever. | |
| [20:29] | KC, Marisa and I are signing up for the talent show. | |
| [20:32] | Yeah. We’ve been practicing. | |
| [20:34] | Look what we can do. Hit it, Ernie. | |
| [20:49] | That’s great. I’ve been practicing, too. May I? | |
| [21:11] | And that’s how you play the piano. | |
| [21:13] | I’m not having fun anymore. | |
| [21:17] | I’m never going to try to be good at anything ever again. | |
| [21:23] | You know what? I just realized something. | |
| [21:26] | I should’ve never quit piano lessons. | |
| [21:28] | I was really good. | |
| [21:31] | That’s not the point of the story. | |
| [21:33] | Okay, fine. | |
| [21:35] | So sometimes I have a little itty bitty | |
| [21:37] | overwhelming need to be the absolute best at everything I do, | |
| [21:41] | but what’s wrong with wanting to be the best? | |
| [21:43] | Nothing, but it’s also not the end of the world if sometimes, somebody else is. | |
| [21:49] | So what? I’m just supposed to dumb myself down? | |
| [21:51] | I’m not gonna do that. | |
| [21:53] | No, we wouldn’t want you to do that. | |
| [21:55] | But all of this “failure isn’t an option” stuff is really a lot of pressure. | |
| [22:00] | And when you’re so focused on beating everyone around you… | |
| [22:02] | Then I lose sight of what’s really important. | |
| [22:05] | Like the fact that I have an amazing brother | |
| [22:08] | and best friend who are actually very, very right. | |
| [22:11] | I’m sorry, guys, and I will work on it. | |
| [22:14] | Okay? I promise. | |
| [22:15] | Now can we go get some fro-yo? | |
| [22:17] | Sounds good. | |
| [22:19] | Ooh, better not forget this. | |
| [22:21] | Mommy loves a senior discount. | |
| [22:30] | C.W. did a really great job with this article. | |
| [22:32] | It is very well-written. | |
| [22:34] | Best article I’ve read all year. | |
| [22:36] | Okay, the only article I’ve read all year. | |
| [22:40] | Ooh. Enjoying the article written about… me? | |
| [22:45] | Yes, actually. | |
| [22:47] | Congrats, Alexis. Well-deserved. | |
| [22:49] | Oh. Thank you, KC. | |
| [22:56] | It’s killing you, isn’t it? | |
| [22:58] | A little bit. | |
| [23:02] | Rob, your name’s on TV. |