| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:19] | Has he said anything at all? | 他有说过话吗 |
| [00:20] | Not yet. | 还没有 |
| [00:21] | We have to call him something. | 我们总得给他个称呼啊 |
| [00:22] | Uh, Jasper, Jasper! | 贾思博 贾思博 |
| [00:24] | I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. | 我不知道我做错了什么 |
| [00:25] | I mean, I’m bending over backwards for this kid. | 我真的拼了命的对那个孩子好 |
| [00:27] | Pulling out all the stops. | 真的 能做的我都做了 |
| [00:29] | Carol, | 卡萝尔 |
| [00:30] | you’re pregnant. | 你怀孕了 |
| [00:32] | What are you up to? | 你在干什么呢 |
| [00:32] | Uh, just going to give Melissa her medication. | 正准备去给梅丽莎送药 |
| [00:34] | Apparently, it takes a few weeks to see results. | 显然 要等上几周才能看到疗效 |
| [00:50] | What’s with all the amps? | 怎么这么大的电流声 |
| [00:52] | I’m trying to listen. | 我正在听呢 |
| [00:54] | Listen to what? | 听什么 |
| [00:56] | Listen to Jasper. | 听贾思博 |
| [01:03] | What’s that? | 这是什么 |
| [01:04] | I slapped one of these bad boys on him. | 我在他身上放了一个这玩意儿 |
| [01:05] | Oh, you got to see him, he looks just like Britney Spears, | 你也该看看的 他和布兰妮简直一模一样 |
| [01:08] | and that’s a major compliment | 这可是很大的夸赞了 |
| [01:09] | ’cause I always found her very attractive. | 因为我觉得她超有魅力的 |
| [01:11] | I mean, not that I’m attracted to Jasper. | 这不是说我也觉得贾思博有魅力 |
| [01:13] | Okay, this is all coming out very wrong. | 好吧好吧 越说越乱 |
| [01:15] | So you’re spying on him. | 那你是在监视他咯 |
| [01:16] | I mean, he still hasn’t talked, | 他仍然一句话都没说呢 |
| [01:17] | so I’m just trying to figure out if he talks | 所以我只是想看看是不是我们都不在的时候 |
| [01:19] | when we’re not around. | 他会说话 |
| [01:20] | Do you have something broken in here? | 你有东西坏了吗 |
| [01:22] | Oh, my God, oh, my God! | 我的天哪 我的天哪 |
| [01:24] | ‘Cause I’m a repairman. | 因为我是个修理工 |
| [01:26] | Deep baritone on that kid. | 这孩子还是个低沉的男中音啊 |
| [01:27] | Let me bring out my tool. | 让我拿出我的工具 |
| [01:28] | Tandy, I don’t think that’s Ja… | 坦迪 我不觉得那是贾… |
| [01:29] | Where exactly is the problem? | 问题到底出在哪儿呢 |
| [01:32] | Right in here. | 问题就在这儿 |
| [01:34] | Wait, who’s that woman? | 等等 那个女人是谁 |
| [01:37] | What the hell? | 什么鬼 |
| [01:44] | Oh, no, Jasper, | 不 贾思博 |
| [01:45] | that’s not for you. | 你不能看这个 |
| [01:47] | Tandy, Jasper got into your self-pleasuring library. | 坦迪 贾思博误闯了你的自慰图书馆 |
| [01:52] | Ah, yeah, no, I know this one very well, yeah. | 不 我很了解这一部 |
| [01:54] | The repairman is there to fix a clogged pipe, | 这个修理工是来修理一个堵住的水管 |
| [01:56] | and then gets sidetracked and, you know, | 然后剧情就变了 你们知道的 |
| [01:58] | winds up doing some sexual stuff with his customer. | 结果他就和他的客户发生了性行为 |
| [02:00] | Tandy! | 坦迪 |
| [02:01] | Oh, sorry, you’re right, spoiler. | 抱歉 你说得对 我剧透了 |
| [02:03] | Uh, no, | 不 |
| [02:04] | uh, Jasper, this is for adults. | 贾思博 成年人才能看这个 |
| [02:06] | You understand? | 你明白吗 |
| [02:20] | Hey, bud. | 你好啊 兄弟 |
| [02:23] | Looking at the stars, huh? | 在看星星 是吧 |
| [02:25] | Look at that. Did you see that? | 看那里 你看到了吗 |
| [02:27] | A shooting star. | 流星耶 |
| [02:29] | That means that you get to make a wish. | 这就意味着你可以许一个愿望 |
| [02:31] | You know what my wish is? | 你知道我的愿望是什么吗 |
| [02:33] | That I could take back those things you saw | 就是可以撤销你在那个色情电影里 |
| [02:35] | in that sensual video. | 看到的东西 |
| [02:37] | Now, I can’t do that, | 虽然我做不到 |
| [02:38] | but I can make this a teachable moment. | 但是我可以让这成为充满教育意义的一刻 |
| [02:41] | Follow me. | 跟我来 |
| [02:43] | Take a frog. | 随便坐 |
| [02:48] | What we’re doing now is having | 我们现在要做的就是俗称 |
| [02:50] | what’s called “the birds and the bees” talk. | “鸟与蜜蜂”的谈话 |
| [02:53] | Okay? | 好吗 |
| [02:55] | So, why birds and bees? | 那么为什么是鸟与蜜蜂呢 |
| [02:57] | Well, ’cause they’re famously known as | 因为大家都知道它们是 |
| [02:58] | the horniest of the flight animals. | 最骚浪贱的飞行动物 |
| [03:00] | You following me so far? | 你还能跟上我的节奏吗 |
| [03:02] | Okay, well, | 好的 |
| [03:03] | here’s where it gets a little funky and a little cool. | 有趣又很酷的是 |
| [03:07] | So the bird takes his, uh, “Mm” | 鸟拔出它的那个 |
| [03:10] | and, uh, uh, puts it in the bee’s “Hmm.” | 放进蜜蜂的那个里面 |
| [03:14] | Know what I’m saying? Yeah. | 懂我的意思吗 不错 |
| [03:15] | And so anyway, they just keep them in there | 不管怎样 它们就这样结合着 |
| [03:18] | and they just move them around, uh, | 然后它们就走来走去 |
| [03:20] | for what’s usually a very, very short period of time. | 通常来说 它们不会走太久 |
| [03:22] | Right? | 对吧 |
| [03:23] | And, uh, that’s the birds and bees talk. Yeah. | 这就是鸟与蜜蜂的谈话 对 |
| [03:26] | God, thought it’d be harder than that. | 天哪 我还以为不会这么容易说出口呢 |
| [03:28] | Well– but, hey, that’s what the bee said. | 但是 蜜蜂就是这样说的 |
| [03:30] | Boom. | 哈哈 |
| [03:34] | Melissa, would you mind wandering around like a zombie | 梅丽莎 你能去别的地方 |
| [03:36] | somewhere else, please? | 像个僵尸一样乱逛吗 谢了 |
| [03:37] | Yeah, Jasper and I are having the, uh… talk. | 没错 贾思博和我在 谈话 |
| [03:41] | Hey, don’t be scared, | 别害怕 |
| [03:42] | she’s not a zombie. | 她不是僵尸 |
| [03:43] | Oh, you probably don’t even know what a zombie is. | 你大概都不知道僵尸是什么 |
| [03:46] | Well… you know when someone dies? | 你知道人会死对吧 |
| [03:49] | Well, a zombie | 僵尸呢 |
| [03:50] | is a corpse that comes back to life. | 就是死而复生的尸体 |
| [03:52] | And they’re terrifying. | 他们很吓人 |
| [03:53] | I mean, they have an insatiable appetite for human flesh, | 他们对人类血肉的渴望永不满足 |
| [03:56] | and they just keep coming after you and after you, | 而且他们会一直追着你 |
| [03:58] | till they get you. | 直到他们抓住你 |
| [03:59] | And they’re so fast. | 而他们的行动又很迅速 |
| [04:00] | Oh, my God. | 我的天哪 |
| [04:01] | Oh, there you are, hon. | 你在这里啊 亲爱的 |
| [04:02] | Cannibals are… | 食人族是 |
| [04:03] | Melissa… | 梅丽莎 |
| [04:04] | Todd? | 陶德 |
| [04:05] | Could you please get Melissa out of here? | 你能把梅丽莎带出去吗 |
| [04:06] | She’s really freaking Jasper out. | 她要把贾思博吓死了 |
| [04:08] | – I’m sorry, buddy. – Here, hon, it’s time for your medication. | -抱歉 兄弟 -亲爱的 该吃药了 |
| [04:12] | She’s kind of in a foggy stage. | 她现在的状态比较一言难尽 |
| [04:13] | I’ve been having to guess on her dosage. | 我一直在猜到底药量应该是多少 |
| [04:15] | I’m not exactly sure how much to give her, so… | 我不知道要给她吃多少药 所以… |
| [04:17] | Less maybe? | 不然少吃点 |
| [04:18] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [04:19] | But maybe more, though. | 但吃多点也行吧 |
| [04:20] | That’s kind of where I’m at. | 我就是这样想的 |
| [04:23] | Hey, bud. | 你好啊 小兄弟 |
| [04:24] | Come on. | 走吧 |
| [04:28] | Aw, look at this. | 看呐 |
| [04:31] | He is a great little artist. | 他真是个小艺术家呀 |
| [04:34] | I thought it was important he have all his stuff here. | 我觉得应该把他所有的东西都拿过来 |
| [04:36] | Make him feel more comfortable. | 让他更自在一些 |
| [04:37] | Whoa, baby bump alert. | 准妈妈上线了 |
| [04:40] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [04:42] | Looks more like a beer belly alert. | 感觉更像是个啤酒肚呢 |
| [04:44] | Hush. You look fantastic. | 别这么说 你美极了 |
| [04:47] | Baby bump, huh? | 显怀了 是吧 |
| [04:49] | Yeah, it’s crazy. | 是啊 简直不可思议 |
| [04:50] | I actually popped a button on my pants yesterday. | 我昨天裤子的扣子都崩开了一颗 |
| [04:55] | Funny, this button-popping story. | 这个崩开扣子的故事太有意思了 |
| [04:59] | I don’t recall you wearing pants yesterday… | 我都不记得你昨天有穿裤子 |
| [05:01] | Well, that’s ’cause I popped a button on them. | 因为我把扣子崩开了啊 |
| [05:04] | Can I see these pants? | 我能看下那条裤子吗 |
| [05:06] | Carol, what do you want with her mother-grabbin’ pants? | 卡萝尔 你想拿她的裤子干什么 |
| [05:09] | She just told this intense story | 她刚讲了这么个有趣的故事 |
| [05:11] | of a button blasting off the front of her jeans, | 说她把自己的裤子扣子崩开了 |
| [05:15] | even though her belly pretty much looks the same to me. | 但是我看她的肚子和我没什么区别啊 |
| [05:17] | So I’m just wondering where these magical, | 所以我就好奇啊 |
| [05:19] | button-popping pants are? | 那条扣子会崩开的魔法裤子在哪儿 |
| [05:22] | Are they in Al Capone’s vault, | 是在艾尔·卡彭的避难所里吗[寓过分夸大] |
| [05:24] | or talking to a Sasquatch and a yeti | 还是说裤子正在尼斯湖底 |
| [05:26] | at the bottom of the Loch Ness lake? | 和北美野人和雪人聊天呢 |
| [05:30] | I can show you the pants, Carol. | 我可以给你看裤子 卡萝尔 |
| [05:32] | It’s fine, I don’t want to see them. | 没关系 我不想看 |
| [05:34] | But, yeah, happy for you. | 但我为你高兴 |
| [05:37] | And your bump. | 也为你显怀了高兴 |
| [05:39] | Oh, boy. | 我的天 |
| [05:42] | I’m starting to wonder if he’s ever gonna talk. | 我开始怀疑他到底会不会说话了 |
| [05:44] | Maybe it’s neurological. | 也许他是神经有问题 |
| [05:46] | No, I know he understands us. | 不 我知道他听得懂我们说话 |
| [05:47] | I’ve seen him roll his eyes at Tandy | 我昨天看他朝坦迪翻了无数次白眼 |
| [05:49] | enough times to know that. | 所以我知道 |
| [05:51] | Yeah, the eye roll is a classic sign of respect. | 是啊 翻白眼是表示尊敬的典型象征 |
| [05:54] | I just don’t understand not talking. | 我就是不明白怎么能不说话 |
| [05:56] | Whenever I have the urge to not talk, I talk about it. | 我每次想要不说话 我都会说出来 |
| [06:01] | Witness. | 我是人证 |
| [06:01] | I mean, I totally get it. | 我完全明白 |
| [06:02] | I mean, think about what he’s been through. | 想想他的遭遇 |
| [06:04] | You know, his parents died, | 他父母双亡 |
| [06:05] | he’s been on his own since he was like four or five. | 他从四五岁起就独自生活 |
| [06:07] | I know, he’s been robbed of his whole childhood. | 我知道 他的童年被完全的剥夺了 |
| [06:10] | Missed all those birthdays, | 他错过了所有的生日 |
| [06:12] | all those Christmases, | 圣诞节 |
| [06:13] | all those Halloweens. | 万圣节 |
| [06:14] | He was so young when the virus hit, I mean, | 病毒来临的时候 他还太小了 |
| [06:16] | he might not even know what any of those holidays are. | 他甚至可能都不知道这些节日是什么 |
| [06:18] | Poor little guy. | 小可怜 |
| [06:19] | I have an idea. | 我有个主意 |
| [06:21] | Why don’t we throw a big party for Jasper? | 不如我们给贾思博办个大型派对吧 |
| [06:25] | Like a birthday party? | 生日派对那种吗 |
| [06:26] | Oh, I’m talking birthday, | 我是说生日 |
| [06:29] | Christmas, Easter, Halloween, Kwanzaa, | 圣诞节 复活节 万圣节 宽扎节 |
| [06:32] | Flag Day, Toyotathon, | 国旗纪念日 丰田马拉松 |
| [06:34] | like, every joyous occasion you’ve ever had | 你经历过的所有快乐的瞬间 |
| [06:36] | just rolled into one festive smorgasbord. | 把它们汇聚成一个大杂烩 |
| [06:39] | That’s a great idea. | 好主意啊 |
| [06:41] | We give him a chance to be a friggin’ kid for once. | 我们给他一个能真正做个孩子的机会 |
| [06:43] | I love it. | 我赞成 |
| [06:44] | You guys, you know, | 大家知道吗 |
| [06:44] | I think this’ll be really good for Melissa too. | 我觉得这对梅丽莎也是个好机会 |
| [06:49] | No, no. No, no, no. No, | 不不不 |
| [06:51] | those don’t go in there, hon. | 这些不能放在里面搅 亲爱的 |
| [06:54] | Those don’t go in there. | 这些不能放进去搅 |
| [06:55] | It’s okay, they just don’t go in there. | 没关系 别的地方还是可以放的 |
| [06:58] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [06:59] | Let’s start planning. | 我们开始筹划吧 |
| [07:00] | – Yeah. – Okay. | -好的 -好的 |
| [07:04] | Hey, bud, can I talk to you for a sec? | 兄弟 我能跟你谈一谈吗 |
| [07:06] | Sure, yeah, what’s up, bud? | 当然了 怎么了 |
| [07:07] | Well, it’s about the party. | 是关于派对的 |
| [07:09] | You know, I think it might be best if Melissa sits this one out. | 我觉梅丽莎最好是不要参加这个派对 |
| [07:12] | She’s doing way better. | 她正在好转 |
| [07:13] | I mean, she doesn’t need her drool towel anymore. | 她现在都不再需要口水巾了 |
| [07:15] | You know, stools are way less tarry. | 大便也不那么黑了 |
| [07:17] | Aren’t they, Melissa? | 对吧 梅丽莎 |
| [07:18] | Hmm? | 什么 |
| [07:19] | Your stools. | 你的大便 |
| [07:20] | Yep. | 对 |
| [07:21] | Yeah, see? | 看到了吧 |
| [07:22] | Real happy to hear those are firming up for her, | 听到她情况好转我真的很开心 |
| [07:25] | but this party’s about Jasper, | 但这个派对是为了贾思博办的 |
| [07:27] | and I just don’t think he’s feeling very comfortable | 我觉得他现在在她身边 |
| [07:29] | around her right now. | 并不是那么自在 |
| [07:30] | Oh, so hide the weirdo, huh? | 所以要把怪人藏起来 对吧 |
| [07:32] | Is that what you’re saying? | 你就是这个意思对吧 |
| [07:33] | Exactly. | 没错 |
| [07:34] | You know what? Just, uh, enjoy planning your party. | 你知道吗 你们好好筹备你们的派对吧 |
| [07:36] | I’ll just go tell Melissa she can go to hell. | 我回去告诉梅丽莎让她去死 |
| [07:38] | Oh, thanks, bud. | 多谢了 兄弟 |
| [07:42] | Ridiculous. | 简直荒谬 |
| [07:54] | Oh, hey, don’t worry about her, | 别担心 |
| [07:55] | she’s not gonna hurt you. | 她不会伤害你的 |
| [07:57] | Here, come on down from there. | 来 下来吧 |
| [07:58] | Hey, what’s going on? | 怎么了 |
| [07:59] | Jasper’s petrified of Melissa. | 贾思博害怕梅丽莎 |
| [08:01] | Yeah– uh, I got this, don’t worry about it. | 我能行的 别担心 |
| [08:03] | Hey, bud, don’t be afraid of her, okay? | 兄弟 别害怕她 好吗 |
| [08:06] | She’s just playing make-believe. | 她只是装装样子 |
| [08:08] | Uh, she’s rehearsing for the title role | 她正在彩排《艾米莉·罗斯的驱魔记》这部舞台剧 |
| [08:10] | in a stage production of The Exorcism of Emily Rose. | 她在里面就演的是艾米丽·罗斯 |
| [08:13] | Oh, come on, Tandy. | 行了 坦迪 |
| [08:14] | Oh, that isn’t cool, yeah, | 没错 这个解释不好 |
| [08:15] | he doesn’t know what an exorcism is. | 他都不知道什么是驱魔 |
| [08:16] | An exorcism is when a demon takes over a person’s body | 驱魔就是指魔鬼占据了一个人的身体 |
| [08:19] | and just makes them do terrible things. | 并让他们做可怕的事情 |
| [08:21] | Okay, I got to say something here. | 行了 我必须得说点什么了 |
| [08:23] | I think it’s wrong to keep Jasper away from Melissa. | 我觉得不应该让贾思博远离梅丽莎 |
| [08:25] | How is he ever gonna get comfortable around her | 如果你都不让他了解她 |
| [08:27] | if you won’t let him get to know her? | 他怎么能适应在她身边呢 |
| [08:28] | I will. | 我会的 |
| [08:29] | Look, right now, | 听着 现在 |
| [08:30] | he just needs to get over that comfort hump, | 他需要走出他的舒适区 |
| [08:32] | then we can totally throw Melissa into the mix. | 然后我们就可以让他接触梅丽莎了 |
| [08:34] | All right, okay. | 好吧 行 |
| [08:36] | Okay, bye, Todd. | 那再见了 陶德 |
| [08:37] | Bye, Emily Rose. | 再见了 艾米丽·罗斯 |
| [08:38] | Uh, sorry, Melissa. | 抱歉 梅丽莎 |
| [08:41] | Jasper? Ah, man. | 贾思博 又这样 |
| [08:43] | Jasper? | 贾思博 |
| [08:45] | Ridiculous. | 荒谬 |
| [08:47] | There it is, there it is. | 就这里 就这里 |
| [08:49] | All right. | 好 |
| [08:53] | Ah, shoot, I left my gun in the car. | 见鬼 我把我的枪落在车里了 |
| [08:55] | Be right back. | 我马上回来 |
| [09:01] | Oh, geez. | 见鬼 |
| [09:02] | What’s this down here again? | 这怎么又掉下去了 |
| [09:05] | Lost a few buttons down there, I see. | 你掉了几颗扣子 我看到了 |
| [09:07] | You think? | 是吗 |
| [09:09] | Ever since you mentioned your button popping off, | 自从你说你把扣子崩开之后 |
| [09:11] | it’s been crazy. | 我就不得了了 |
| [09:12] | Lost 16 yesterday. | 我昨天掉了16颗扣子 |
| [09:14] | Ah, you’re really having a time there. | 那你真是厉害啊 |
| [09:17] | Tell me about it. | 谁说不是 |
| [09:18] | It’s like a sharknado but with buttons. | 就好像下扣子雨一样 |
| [09:21] | Yeah, you be careful. | 那你小心点 |
| [09:23] | Aw, what can I say? It’s the life we’ve chosen. | 我能怎么办 这是我们自己选的 |
| [09:25] | – Preggers can’t be choosers. – Yeah. | -怀孕的人没得选 -是啊 |
| [09:36] | Couldn’t find my gun, so I used the car. | 我没找到枪 所以就用车了 |
| [09:38] | Well, you just saw. | 你们刚看到了 |
| [09:43] | Oh, this is great. | 好极了 |
| [09:44] | Yeah. | 对 |
| [09:47] | How’s this place for a picnic? | 这里野餐如何 |
| [09:49] | Okay, | 好 |
| [09:50] | let’s see what we have here. | 看看有什么 |
| [09:54] | Hey, this isn’t what I packed. | 这不是我打包的东西 |
| [09:57] | This basket is filled with toys and treats. | 这个篮子里满是玩具和礼物 |
| [10:01] | Melissa, did you empty this basket | 梅丽莎 是你把篮子清空 |
| [10:03] | and fill it with toys and treats for Jasper? | 然后放上了给贾思博的玩具和礼物吗 |
| [10:06] | No. | 没有 |
| [10:08] | I’m not mad. | 我不生气 |
| [10:10] | You have a fun-loving spirit. You’re accessible. | 你真有玩乐精神 你如此平易近人 |
| [10:15] | Hey, Jasper! | 贾思博 |
| [10:16] | You want some of these toys and treats | 你想要一些梅丽莎带给你的 |
| [10:18] | that Melissa brought for you? | 玩具和礼物吗 |
| [10:22] | Well, they’re over here if you change your mind. | 你改主意的话就过来玩 |
| [10:25] | Oh, my God! A water gun? | 天啊 水枪 |
| [10:28] | I’m gonna get you. | 我要打倒你 |
| [10:36] | Well, well, well. | 看啊看啊 |
| [10:39] | What’s going on here? | 这是在干什么 |
| [10:40] | I– I was just, uh, having a picnic with Melissa. | 我…就跟梅丽莎野餐 |
| [10:44] | Oh, that’s weird. | 真是奇怪 |
| [10:46] | Don’t think I ever remember you having a picnic before. | 我好像不记得你们以前野餐过 |
| [10:49] | No, yeah, I have picnics all the time. | 我一直都有野餐的 |
| [10:50] | Oh, you do? All the time? | 是吗 一直 |
| [10:52] | All the time, having picnics all the time. | 一直都有野餐 |
| [10:56] | Why don’t you name 20 picnics you’ve had before. | 那你告诉我你以前的20次野餐 |
| [10:58] | Come on. Now. | 快说 |
| [10:59] | Uh, t-t-today. Okay? | 今天 好吗 |
| [11:01] | Yeah, that’s one. One picnic. | 好 这是一次 就一次 |
| [11:03] | In-in Malibu. I had one on the beach. | 在马里布时我在沙滩上有过一次 |
| [11:05] | That’s two. 18 more, come on. | 两次了 还有18次 |
| [11:07] | Come on! | 快说 |
| [11:08] | Name 18 more picnics, Todd! Now! | 再说出18次野餐 陶德 快 |
| [11:10] | I can’t think of any! Okay? | 我想不出了 好吗 |
| [11:12] | No, you can’t. ‘Cause you’re lying about | 你是想不出 因为对野餐的喜好上 |
| [11:14] | your affinity for picnics, Todd, aren’t you? | 你撒谎了 对吗 陶德 |
| [11:16] | Well, excuse me | 那对不起 |
| [11:18] | for trying to establish a connection | 我不该想让贾思博 |
| [11:19] | between Jasper and Melissa. | 和梅丽莎搞好关系 |
| [11:20] | You’re not excused. | 我不原谅你 |
| [11:22] | I just know that once he gets to know her, | 我知道 一旦他了解她 |
| [11:23] | he’ll see how awesome she is. | 他会知道她是个很棒的人 |
| [11:25] | Oh, so that makes it okay to lie about a friggin’ picnic! | 所以你对野餐的事撒谎就没问题了吗 |
| [11:28] | Well, I’m not the only one who’s lying, am I? | 我不是唯一一个撒谎的 对吧 |
| [11:30] | That’s different and you know it. | 这不一样 你明知道 |
| [11:31] | I’m just trying to protect my son and give him the nice, | 我只想保护我儿子 给他一个他应有的 |
| [11:34] | safe party that he deserves. | 美好安全的派对 |
| [11:36] | Yeah, well, you know what, don’t worry because | 行了 知道了 你放心 |
| [11:37] | Melissa and I won’t be at your stupid party. | 我和梅丽莎不会去你的破派对 |
| [11:39] | Todd, look, it’s okay if you come. | 陶德 你来没关系 |
| [11:42] | Oh, really? What day is it again? | 是吗 是什么时候来着 |
| [11:43] | – Oh, it’s tonight. – I’m busy. | -今晚 -我很忙 |
| [11:47] | – Fine. – Fine. | -好吧 -好吧 |
| [11:48] | Fine. | 好吧 |
| [11:49] | You having fun, Jasper? | 你玩得开心吗 贾思博 |
| [12:37] | Ho-ho-ho, gobble-gobble, Shabbat shalom, boo! | 哈哈哈 巴拉巴拉我来啦 |
| [12:41] | I’m Rabbi-Jack-O- Thanks-Bunny-Claus. | 我是感恩兔子拉比老人 |
| [12:45] | And I’m Lady Liberty-Patrick-Cupid-Claus. | 我是自由女神丘比特老人 |
| [12:48] | And tonight’s your night, bro. | 今晚是属于你的夜晚 伙计 |
| [12:51] | Behold! | 看啊 |
| [12:56] | *Y’all ready for this?* | *你们都准备好了吗* |
| [13:06] | Jasper, | 贾思博 |
| [13:06] | welcome to a taste of every major holiday | 欢迎来到所有重要节日 |
| [13:09] | rolled into one magical experience. | 集于一体的神奇节日 |
| [13:13] | Over the next four days… | 接下来四天… |
| [13:14] | Four days? | 四天 |
| [13:15] | …we are going to overwhelm | 我们要刺激 |
| [13:17] | the pleasure centers of your brain, | 你的大脑兴奋中枢 |
| [13:19] | tantalizing you with one magical holiday after another, | 用一个接一个神奇的节日诱惑你 |
| [13:23] | and pushing you to your celebratory brink. | 让你到达欢庆的崩溃边缘 |
| [13:26] | Four freakin’ days? | 整整四天 |
| [13:28] | Let’s get started. | 我们开始吧 |
| [13:30] | We thought we’d ease you in with a little gateway holiday. | 我们先以一个小开胃节日开始吧 |
| [13:33] | *Y’all ready for Arbor Day?* | *大家准备好过植物界了吗* |
| [13:40] | Pine! | 松树 |
| [13:42] | Conifer! | 针叶树 |
| [13:44] | Spruce! | 云杉 |
| [13:46] | Deciduous! | 落叶植物 |
| [13:47] | Arbor Day! | 植树节 |
| [14:04] | Ridiculous. | 荒谬 |
| [14:14] | Fireworks! | 烟花 |
| [14:16] | Hot dogs! | 热狗 |
| [14:17] | Separation of Powers. | 三权分立 |
| [14:20] | Tandy. | 坦迪 |
| [14:21] | *And the home Of the Brave.* | *勇敢之人的家* |
| [14:29] | Yes. | 棒 |
| [14:30] | And that’s the Fourth of July. | 这是独立日 |
| [14:32] | Now if you’ll just hop over here– spoiler. | 现在跳过来 提示 |
| [14:36] | ‘Cause there’s more! | 还有更多呦 |
| [14:38] | And here to take you through this one | 带你过这个节日的 |
| [14:40] | is someone very special. | 是一个很特别的人 |
| [14:45] | Um, someone very special. | 一个很特别的人 |
| [14:50] | Gail! | 盖尔 |
| [14:52] | Hey, I was putting on my friggin’ ears. | 我刚才在戴耳朵 |
| [14:55] | Oh, my God. | 天啊 |
| [14:56] | It’s the Easter Bunny. | 是复活节兔子 |
| [14:58] | Hi, I’m the Easter Bunny. Nibble, nibble. | 你好 我是复活节兔子 吱吱吱 |
| [15:03] | Easter Bunny, don’t you have anything else to say? | 复活节兔子 你没别的要说了吗 |
| [15:07] | Nibble. | 吱吱 |
| [15:12] | Egg hunts! | 找蛋 |
| [15:14] | Resurrection! | 复活 |
| [15:16] | Hey, we’re trying to watch a movie in here! | 我们在看电影呢 |
| [15:19] | To be free! | 自由 |
| [15:22] | In the Declaration of Independence, it is written: | 《独立宣言》中写道 |
| [15:26] | all men are created equal | 人人生而平等 |
| [15:29] | and endowed with certain inalienable rights! | 拥有天赋人权 |
| [15:34] | That is where America is! | 这就是美国 |
| [15:38] | Love it or leave it! | 不喜欢就走人 |
| [15:39] | You better love it or you better leave it. | 不喜欢的话你最好走人 |
| [15:46] | You take this stick and you hit it, and candy flies out of it. | 用这根棍子打它 糖果就会全掉出来 |
| [15:51] | Okay. You’re good to go for Mardi Gras. | 好 准备好过狂欢节了 |
| [15:53] | All right. | 好 |
| [15:53] | When in doubt, just douse him with beads. | 不知道怎么做时就把珠子给他 |
| [15:56] | Okay, thanks. | 知道了 谢谢 |
| [15:57] | What do you have next? | 下面是什么 |
| [15:58] | Labor Day. | 劳动节 |
| [15:59] | Oh, that’s kind of a tough one. | 这就难办了 |
| [16:02] | Why would you say that? | 为什么这么说 |
| [16:03] | I mean, there’s just not much going on there. | 因为劳动节没什么活动 |
| [16:06] | Yeah. | 对 |
| [16:08] | You and Gail have made that abundantly clear. | 你和盖尔已经说得很明白了 |
| [16:10] | Excuse me? | 什么 |
| [16:11] | What would me and my flat belly know about Labor Day, right? | 我和我平坦的肚子知道什么劳动节 对吧 |
| [16:15] | Meanwhile you’re over there laughing it up on Fat Tuesday | 而你却在那挺着自己的大肚子 |
| [16:18] | with your pulchritudinous belly bump. | 开心地笑出了声 |
| [16:20] | Carol, I got pregnant a few weeks before you. | 卡萝尔 我比你早几周怀孕 |
| [16:24] | How can you be jealous that my baby bump came first? | 你怎么能嫉妒我先显怀呢 |
| [16:26] | I’m not jealous that your baby bump came first. | 我没有嫉妒你先显怀 |
| [16:29] | Then what the hell’s your problem? | 那你有什么问题 |
| [16:31] | I’m jealous that your baby bump came at all. | 我就是嫉妒你显怀这件事 |
| [16:34] | Oh. | 好吧 |
| [16:36] | I’m just really scared. | 我真的很害怕 |
| [16:38] | I mean, what if my bump never comes? | 如果我的肚子不会大起来怎么办 |
| [16:41] | I haven’t had any pregnancy symptoms. | 我一点怀孕的迹象都没有 |
| [16:45] | What if the test was off? | 万一检查结果不准呢 |
| [16:46] | What if something’s really wrong? | 万一真的出问题了呢 |
| [16:48] | Oh, Carol, you’re fine. | 卡萝尔 没事的 |
| [16:50] | But you don’t really know that for sure, do you? | 但是你根本不确定 对吧 |
| [16:55] | So the homeowner then opens the door, | 然后屋主打开门 |
| [16:57] | he sees the bag burning, he stomps on it, | 他看到袋子在燃烧 他踩了上去 |
| [17:00] | and his foot gets just covered in dog poop. | 然后他就踩了一脚狗屎 |
| [17:02] | Now, since all dogs are dead now, | 鉴于现在狗都死光了 |
| [17:04] | instead of dog poop, I used my own. | 所以我没用狗屎 而是自己的屎 |
| [17:06] | Trick or treat! | 不给塘就捣蛋 |
| [17:07] | Smell my feet, give us something good to eat! | 快点给我们点吃的吧 |
| [17:13] | What are you doing here? | 你们来做什么 |
| [17:14] | Melissa and I, we’re, we’re trick-or-treating, bud. | 我和梅丽莎在玩不给糖就捣蛋 伙计 |
| [17:17] | We’re dressed like two nice people who belong at parties! | 我们打扮成了可以参加派对的正常人 |
| [17:21] | Look, I thought we talked about this, bud. | 我们不是说过了么 伙计 |
| [17:23] | You know what? I’ve met guys like you before. | 知道吗 我见过你这种人 |
| [17:26] | Mr., uh, Velvet Rope. Mr. Party. | 天鹅绒绳先生 派对先生 |
| [17:29] | With your little clipboard looking down, | 拿着你的小本本边看边说 |
| [17:31] | “Let’s see, are you on the guest list?” | 来看看 你们在宾客名单上吗 |
| [17:33] | You know how many clubs I stood outside of | 你知道因为我不在宾客名单上 |
| [17:36] | ’cause I wasn’t on the list? | 所以进不去多少酒吧吗 |
| [17:38] | Barrage, Mosaic, | 巴拉奇 马赛克 |
| [17:41] | Jericho, Rain, | 杰里科 雨吧 |
| [17:43] | uh, JP Looneys, Charlie Fitzwhiskey’s. | JP鲁尼 查理费兹维奇 |
| [17:46] | All of the hot Baltimore clubs. | 巴尔的摩所有的人气酒吧 |
| [17:48] | They all spat in my face. | 他们都不让我进去 |
| [17:50] | That’s cool. | 不过没事 |
| [17:51] | ‘Cause I’ll tell you what, bud. | 因为我告诉 伙计 |
| [17:52] | I refuse to let you or anybody else | 我拒绝让你或者任何人 |
| [17:55] | keep me outside of your phony velvet rope. | 阻止我进入你的假派对 |
| [17:59] | Hey, Jasper, | 贾思博 |
| [18:00] | you remember how I said that Melissa | 你还记得我说梅丽莎 |
| [18:01] | was rehearsing for a role? | 正在为一个角色彩排吗 |
| [18:03] | Well, Todd is helping her out | 现在陶德在通过 |
| [18:05] | by playing an over-the-top, drunken buffoon. | 扮演一个夸张醉酒的小丑来帮她 |
| [18:08] | Oh, come on, Tandy, stop it with the lies, okay? | 行了 坦迪 别撒谎了好吗 |
| [18:10] | This kid– Jasper, you deserve the truth. | 这孩子 贾思博 你应该知道真相 |
| [18:12] | Melissa’s sick. That’s the truth. | 梅丽莎病了 这就是真相 |
| [18:14] | And I’m legitimately drunk, bud… | 而我确实喝醉了 伙计… |
| [18:16] | Todd. | 陶德 |
| [18:17] | None of this is real. | 这一切都不是真的 |
| [18:18] | Everybody knows it. Everybody. | 所有人都知道 所有人 |
| [18:20] | Oh, that’s it. Get the hell out of here. | 行了 你给我滚 |
| [18:21] | You make me. | 你来啊 |
| [18:22] | You make me get out. | 你来让我滚啊 |
| [18:23] | Oh, you want to go? | 你想单挑吗 |
| [18:25] | I thought you’d never ask. | 我还以为你永远不会问了 |
| [18:26] | Oh, so you do want to go? | 所以你确实想单挑 |
| [18:28] | I’d love to go. The question is: do you want to go? | 我是想单挑 问题是 你想单挑吗 |
| [18:30] | I was the one who proposed it, Todd. | 是我提出来的 陶德 |
| [18:31] | You want to go? | 你想单挑吗 |
| [18:32] | I just freaking confirmed it. | 我刚说了我想 |
| [18:34] | I do want to go. | 我确实想 |
| [18:35] | Then let’s go outside and go. | 那我们就出去单挑 |
| [18:36] | Then let’s go, go. | 去就去 走啊 |
| [18:38] | Let’s go! | 走 |
| [18:39] | Are they gonna go? | 他们要去单挑吗 |
| [18:41] | I think they went. | 好像是去单挑了 |
| [18:44] | – Come on! – Oh, I’m coming on! | -来啊 -我这不是来了 |
| [18:46] | – Bring it bud. – Yeah, I will bring it! | -放马过来 -我一定会 |
| [18:48] | How about right here? | 这里如何 |
| [18:49] | Not afraid of you! | 我才不怕你 |
| [18:50] | – Stop it! – Push me a-frigging-gain. | -住手 -有种来啊 |
| [18:52] | Tandy, stop it! | 坦迪 住手 |
| [18:53] | No, I can’t do that, Carol. | 不行 卡萝尔 |
| [18:55] | I made a verbal commitment to do this. | 我口头答应好了 |
| [18:57] | Then you stop it, Todd. | 那你住手 陶德 |
| [18:59] | I’m part of that commitment, Erica! | 他答应的就是我 艾瑞卡 |
| [19:00] | You both should be committed. | 你们俩都应该兑现 |
| [19:02] | This guy ruined a kid’s party! | 这家伙毁了一个孩子的派对 |
| [19:04] | And probably his life. | 也有可能毁了他的生活 |
| [19:05] | You’re a bigot! | 你顽固不化 |
| [19:06] | Or am I a hero? | 还是说我是英雄 |
| [19:07] | Y’all fight like a couple of straight-up chumps. | 你们俩打个架怎么跟呆瓜一样 |
| [19:11] | Hey, Tandy, soup’s on. Huh? | 坦迪 汤来了 |
| [19:13] | Tonight’s special: | 今晚特色 |
| [19:15] | cream of your face. | 满脸奶油 |
| [19:16] | Oh, really? ‘Cause I heard it was Todd-mato soup! Burn. | 是吗 我怎么听说是陶德豆汤 呵呵 |
| [19:20] | That sucked, dude. | 烂透了 |
| [19:22] | – Oh, take that back. – Make me! | -收回去 -逼我啊 |
| [19:24] | – You don’t want to know what’s gonna happen – Come on! | -如果你不马上收回去 -来啊 |
| [19:26] | – if you don’t take that back right now! – Let me see! | -那你不知道会发生什么 -让我见识见识啊 |
| [19:27] | – Take it back! – I want to see! Come on! | -收回去 -我想见识一下 来啊 |
| [19:32] | Stop it! | 住手 |
| [19:33] | Party’s over! Say good night, bud! | 派对结束了 说再见吧 伙计 |
| [19:35] | No! No! | 不不 |
| [19:36] | Stop this insanity! | 别胡闹了 |
| [19:41] | What the hell? | 搞什么 |
| [20:02] | Oh, my God. | 天啊 |
| [20:10] | Todd, he’s laughing. | 陶德 他在笑 |
| [20:11] | Yeah. Look at ’em. | 看看他们 |
| [20:17] | It’s been a while since I’ve seen her smile. | 我已经很久没见她笑了 |
| [20:22] | I’m sorry, bud. | 抱歉 伙计 |
| [20:24] | Guess I over-cranked a little bit. | 我好想有点逞强了 |
| [20:26] | I totally get it. | 我明白 |
| [20:27] | You were just trying to protect Jasper. | 你只想保护贾思博 |
| [20:30] | I’m sorry for busting up your party. | 抱歉毁了你的派对 |
| [20:34] | I guess whiskey and Milk don’t mix. | 看来威士忌和牛奶不搭 |
| [20:36] | You’re drinking whiskey and milk? | 你喝了威士忌加牛奶 |
| [20:38] | No, I drank whiskey and watched the movie Milk. | 不是 我是边喝威士忌边看电影《牛奶》 |
| [20:43] | Hey, get in here, ya friggin’ fartface. | 来抱抱 你个讨厌鬼 |
| [20:46] | – What were we doing? – I don’t know. | -我们这是在干什么 -谁知道呢 |
| [20:48] | Look, it’s a shooting star. | 快看 有流星 |
| [20:52] | Oh, it’s a big one. | 好大一颗 |
| [20:59] | Make a wish, dummies. | 快许愿 傻瓜们 |