| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:05] | Hey, Calvin. | 卡尔文 |
| [00:06] | Hey, how was your run? | 跑得怎么样 |
| [00:07] | Oh, it was great; I did five miles but I could really use… | 很棒 跑了五英里 但我现在需要… |
| [00:14] | …some new shoes. | 换双新鞋 |
| [00:16] | Oh, my bad. | 不好意思 |
| [00:17] | I thought you were gonna say “cool down.” | 我以为你想说需要凉快下 |
| [00:20] | Hey, did you see the ambulance | 你看到昨晚班森家门前 |
| [00:21] | in front of Mr. Benson’s last night? | 停的救护车了吗 |
| [00:23] | Yeah. | 看到了 |
| [00:24] | Any idea what happened? I want to get some intel | 知道出什么事了吗 我得了解点情况 |
| [00:26] | so I can update our neighborhood Facebook page. | 好更新咱们社区的脸书网主页 |
| [00:28] | We have a neighborhood Facebook page? | 咱们社区还有脸书网主页呢 |
| [00:31] | How many people are on it? | 加了多少人 |
| [00:32] | Well, as soon as you accept my friend request, two. | 要是你通过我的好友申请 就是两人 |
| [00:37] | So do you know what happened to Mr. Benson? | 那你知道班森先生怎么了吗 |
| [00:39] | Yeah. | 知道 |
| [00:40] | He dead. | 死了 |
| [00:41] | Whoa, wha-what? Calvin. | 什么 卡尔文 |
| [00:44] | That– that’s terrible. | 太糟了 |
| [00:46] | You wouldn’t say that if you knew him. | 你要是认识他就不会这么说了 |
| [00:48] | I mean… | 我是说… |
| [00:49] | there’s a reason that people in this neighborhood | 邻居们喊他”刻薄班森先生” |
| [00:50] | called him “Mean Mr. Benson.” | 是有原因的 |
| [00:53] | I didn’t know they called him that. | 我都不知道 |
| [00:55] | Yeah, probably like you don’t know | 大概你也不知道 |
| [00:56] | they call you “Bobblehead Dave.” | 大家喊你”大头戴夫” |
| [01:00] | Oh, I know it and I love it. | 我知道 我挺喜欢的 |
| [01:04] | So what was so mean about Mr. Benson? | 班森先生怎么刻薄了 |
| [01:05] | Oh, everything. The man has terrorized | 可说的太多了 从我小时候起 |
| [01:08] | this neighborhood since I was a kid. | 他就对整个邻里凶巴巴的 |
| [01:09] | Always yelling at people to cut their grass | 总是冲别人嚷嚷让人家割草 |
| [01:12] | or pull their trash cans up. | 或者是把垃圾桶扶起来 |
| [01:14] | And if ever I had a ball or a Frisbee go into his yard, | 如果我的球或者飞盘掉进他家院子 |
| [01:17] | never saw it again. | 就有去无回了 |
| [01:19] | You know, that actually reminds me. | 还真提醒我了 |
| [01:21] | I accidentally threw our Frisbee | 我有天无意之中 |
| [01:23] | into your backyard the other day. | 把飞盘扔进你家后院了 |
| [01:25] | – Green one? – Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. | -绿色的 -对对 |
| [01:26] | Haven’t seen it. | 没看见 |
| [01:29] | Well, you know– | 我说… |
| [01:31] | I’m sure Mr. Benson wasn’t all bad. | 班森先生不可能一无是处 |
| [01:33] | I mean, take my Aunt Phyllis. | 比如说我菲利斯婶婶 |
| [01:34] | Nobody liked her, but once you got over the fact | 没人喜欢她 但只要你能接受 |
| [01:36] | that she treated her pets better than people | 她对宠物比对人好 |
| [01:38] | and pretty much despised all of humanity, | 而且几乎瞧不上所有人 |
| [01:40] | she made the most delicious rhubarb pie. | 就会发现她做的大黄派最好吃了 |
| [01:45] | Well, Mr. Benson was so mean, | 班森先生太凶了 |
| [01:47] | not even the Jehovah’s Witnesses would knock on his door. | 耶和华见证会的人都不敲他家门 |
| [01:50] | And they talk to anybody. | 耶和华见证人可是来者不拒 |
| [01:52] | I know, aren’t they the best? | 我知道 他们最棒了 |
| [01:55] | But then they’re always like, “We got to go now, Dave.” | 不过他们总会说 “我们得走了 戴夫” |
| [01:59] | So, do you know when they’re having his funeral? | 那你知道他的葬礼什么时候举行吗 |
| [02:01] | I don’t know. He was such a loner. | 不知道 他那么不合群 |
| [02:03] | There probably won’t be one. | 估计不会有葬礼 |
| [02:05] | And even if there was, no one would go. | 就算有 也不会有人参加 |
| [02:08] | Man, that’s so sad, Calvin. | 这也太惨了 卡尔文 |
| [02:10] | We should do something to remember him. | 我们该做点什么纪念他 |
| [02:13] | We should put his death on the neighborhood Facebook page. | 我们应该在社区脸书网主页上给他发讣告 |
| [02:16] | What– So you’ll accept my friend request? | 什么 那你愿意接受我的好友申请了 |
| [02:18] | Sure. Just as soon as he does. | 当然 只要他也接受 |
| [02:38] | “Ten Ways to Please Your Man.” | “取悦男人的十招” |
| [02:43] | All right, well, let’s see what’s on the menu for this weekend. | 我看看这周末有什么花样 |
| [02:47] | Okay, okay, I ain’t mad at that. | 不错 不错 我不抵触这个 |
| [02:50] | I see you, number seven. | 我看到你了 第七招 |
| [02:51] | Okay. | 不错 |
| [02:53] | Oh, number nine, you just a little ol’ freak. | 第九招 你可有点变态 |
| [02:57] | Let’s see what number ten is– Oh, hell no. | 看看第十招是什么 不要 |
| [03:01] | No, nuh-uh, oh. | 不要 |
| [03:02] | No, uh-uh. | 不要 |
| [03:08] | – Hey, babe. – Oh, hey, Calvin. | -亲爱的 -卡尔文 |
| [03:11] | What’s all this? | 这都是什么 |
| [03:12] | Well, we just came from the church meeting | 我们去参加了教会会议 |
| [03:14] | about Mr. Benson passing. | 讨论班森先生去世的事 |
| [03:15] | And since he didn’t have any people, | 鉴于他没有任何亲友 |
| [03:17] | – I offered to throw the repass here. – What? | -我提出在这摆悼念席 -什么 |
| [03:20] | And then I discovered that a repass was kind of | 然后我发现悼念席类似 |
| [03:22] | like a funeral after-party and we were off to the races. | 葬礼后的聚会 我们就迫不及待了 |
| [03:27] | Uh, hold on, Tina. | 等下 缇娜 |
| [03:29] | We’re not hosting a repass for somebody I hated. | 我们不能给我讨厌的人摆悼念席 |
| [03:32] | I wouldn’t host one for myself and I love me. | 我都不给自己摆悼念席 我最爱自己了 |
| [03:37] | Look, I didn’t like him any more than you | 我跟你一样不怎么喜欢他 |
| [03:38] | but it’s the Christian thing to do and besides, | 但这是基督教徒该做的 再说了 |
| [03:40] | I’ve thrown plenty of stuff for you that I didn’t want to. | 我违背自己意愿为你举办过很多聚会 |
| [03:43] | – Like what? – Like that end of the year banquet | -比如什么 -比如那次 |
| [03:45] | for your bowling team where you all just | 为你们保龄球队举办的年终宴会 |
| [03:46] | sat around and complained about being robbed. | 你们只是全程坐在那儿抱怨被坑了 |
| [03:49] | They overwaxed the lanes, Tina. | 保龄球道打蜡太多了 缇娜 |
| [03:54] | You know, this repass has your name | 这次悼念席怎么看都像 |
| [03:56] | written all over it. | 你出的主意[写满你的名字] |
| [03:58] | Oh, you mean like my Frisbee? | 就像我的飞盘吗 |
| [04:02] | Calvin, don’t worry, okay? | 卡尔文 别担心好吗 |
| [04:03] | I’m pitching in, too: I’m picking up flowers | 我也做贡献了 我负责买花 |
| [04:05] | and I volunteered to say a few words on Mr. Benson’s behalf. | 而且我自愿代表班森先生讲发言 |
| [04:08] | But you didn’t even know the man. | 但你都不认识他 |
| [04:10] | And I’m about to change that. | 我要改变这点 |
| [04:11] | I’m gonna ask people in the neighborhood | 我要问邻里邻居 |
| [04:13] | for their fond memories of him. | 关于他的美好记忆 |
| [04:14] | Oh, okay. Here’s one. | 我就有 |
| [04:16] | For Halloween, he threw rocks at me and yelled at me, | 万圣节时他冲我扔石头 还吼我说 |
| [04:19] | “Get off my lawn, Wack Ninja!” | “滚出我家草坪 怪忍者” |
| [04:23] | I wasn’t even a ninja, Dave. | 我根本没扮忍者 戴夫 |
| [04:24] | I was a black ghost. | 我是黑幽灵 |
| [04:28] | Calvin, I’ve never seen a black ghost. | 卡尔文 我从没见过黑幽灵 |
| [04:30] | Well, trust me. In this neighborhood, | 相信我 在这个街区 |
| [04:32] | you don’t want to walk around | 千万不要脑袋上顶条白床单 |
| [04:33] | with a white sheet over your head. | 在马路上走 |
| [04:37] | Fine, you know what? Maybe Mr. Benson was | 好吧 也许班森先生 |
| [04:40] | a little bit grumpy. | 是有点暴躁 |
| [04:41] | But I believe that if you look hard enough, | 但是我相信只要你尽力去找 |
| [04:43] | there’s something nice to say about everybody. | 就会发现每个人都有优点 |
| [04:45] | Oh, see? This is about your bitter old aunt | 你其实还是在说刻薄的菲利斯婶婶 |
| [04:48] | and her bitter rhubarb pie. | 还有她做的难吃的大黄派 |
| [04:49] | Oh, no, no, no. | 不对 不对 |
| [04:51] | My aunt was bitter. | 我婶婶是很刻薄 |
| [04:53] | The rhubarb pie was incredible, Calvin. | 但是她做的大黄派非常好吃 卡尔文 |
| [04:59] | It’s so nice of you guys to host Mr. Benson’s repass. | 你们真好 愿意组织班森先生的悼念席 |
| [05:02] | Well, it’s the right thing to do. | 这都是我们应该做的 |
| [05:04] | Get the neighborhood together, | 让左邻右舍都能聚到一起 |
| [05:05] | everybody brings food. And bam, | 而且每个人都会拿吃的过来 |
| [05:07] | there’s enough leftovers that Mama doesn’t | 然后会剩下很多吃的 接下来一周 |
| [05:09] | have to cook for a week. | 我都不用做饭了 |
| [05:12] | Hey, Mom. | 妈妈 |
| [05:13] | Hi, sweetie. | 宝贝 |
| [05:15] | I’ve been thinking about Mr. Benson. | 我在想班森先生去世的事情 |
| [05:17] | Where do people go when they die? | 人死后会去哪里呢 |
| [05:21] | Well… | 这个嘛 |
| [05:23] | that’s a good question. | 这个问题问的好 |
| [05:24] | And the answer is very complicated. | 而答案很复杂 |
| [05:27] | You see, existence is a complex thing… | 人活在世界上是很复杂的… |
| [05:29] | Do you know, Miss Tina? | 缇娜阿姨 你知道吗 |
| [05:32] | Well, of course I do. | 我当然知道了 |
| [05:35] | If you’re good, you go to this glorious place | 你要是好人的话 就会去一个很棒的地方 |
| [05:38] | in the sky called Heaven, filled with angels | 在天上叫作天堂 里面有很多天使 |
| [05:41] | and toys and all the candy you can eat. | 还有好多玩具和吃不完的糖 |
| [05:43] | Cool. | 酷 |
| [05:45] | See, Mom? Simple. | 妈妈 你看 这多简单 |
| [05:50] | Well, that wasn’t exactly the answer I was gonna give. | 其实我并不想这样跟他讲 |
| [05:52] | I know, girl, but I got a repass to plan. | 我懂 但是我还得准备悼念席啊 |
| [05:55] | We would have been here all day. | 要真解释起来一天都讲不完 |
| [05:58] | I didn’t even think about all the questions | 我都没想过这个事情会 |
| [05:59] | this was gonna raise for Grover. | 让葛罗弗产生这么多疑问 |
| [06:01] | Well, why don’t you just tell him what you think? | 那你为什么不告诉他你的想法 |
| [06:03] | Because that’s exactly what my parents did to me. | 我爸妈就是这样做的 |
| [06:06] | They told me what to believe. | 他们告诉我该相信什么 |
| [06:08] | I-I’d rather have Grover figure it out for himself. | 我倒是希望葛罗弗能自己去想明白 |
| [06:10] | I respect that. | 我尊重你的方式 |
| [06:12] | I mean, it’s blasphemous, but I respect it. | 这样虽然对上帝不敬 但我尊重你的方式 |
| [06:21] | And what’s this? | 这是什么 |
| [06:28] | Looks like somebody wants an early birthday present. | 看来有人想提前收生日礼物了 |
| [06:34] | Hey, babe. | 宝贝 |
| [06:36] | Got the food for the repass. | 我给悼念席准备了吃的 |
| [06:42] | Calvin, what is this? I told you to get finger foods. | 卡尔文 我跟你说了要能用手拿的食物 |
| [06:44] | Oh, I did. | 是啊 |
| [06:46] | You can eat these day-old bagels with your fingers. | 你可以用手吃这些过期的百吉饼 |
| [06:50] | Oh, he’s just being cheap because Mean Mr. Benson never paid him | 他又在小家子气了 因为79年夏天 |
| [06:53] | for mowing the lawn in the summer of ’79. | 刻薄班森先生没有付他修剪草坪的钱 |
| [06:56] | Oh, I’m sorry. | 请问 |
| [06:57] | Is there a statute of limitations | 让黑色幽灵哭泣的事情 |
| [06:59] | on making a black ghost cry? | 还有诉讼时效吗 |
| [07:03] | Calvin, don’t you think you’re being a little ridiculous? | 卡尔文 你不觉得你有点无理取闹吗 |
| [07:05] | Just let it go. | 算了吧 |
| [07:08] | This from the lady who had to switch | 说这个话的女人可是在超市的快速通道 |
| [07:09] | grocery stores for being called out | 拿了超过12件商品去结账 然后被赶出来 |
| [07:11] | for having more than 12 items in the express lane. | 最后不得不换超市的人啊 |
| [07:15] | If they’re gonna count gum as an item, | 他们要是把口香糖也当商品的话 |
| [07:17] | it shouldn’t be at the register. | 就不应该放在收银处 |
| [07:23] | Turns out half my childhood | 原来我一半的童年纪念 |
| [07:24] | was in Mean Mr. Benson’s backyard. | 都在班森先生的院子里 |
| [07:28] | Oh, lookee here. | 看这个 |
| [07:30] | – It’s Marty’s little army doll. – Hey, man. | -是马蒂的士兵小玩偶 -别这样 |
| [07:34] | He was a prisoner of war for 15 years. | 他当了15年战俘啊 |
| [07:39] | Welcome home, soldier. | 欢迎回家 士兵 |
| [07:42] | So much has changed. | 时过境迁啊 |
| [07:44] | Oh, what’s that? | 你说什么 |
| [07:46] | Oh, no, Malcolm still lives here. | 没有 马尔科姆还住这呢 |
| [07:51] | Mom, what’s a massage parlor? | 妈妈 按摩院是什么地方 |
| [07:53] | What? What– | 什么 什么 |
| [07:55] | Why would you ask that? | 你为什么会问这个 |
| [07:57] | I’m looking for Heaven on Google Maps | 我在谷歌地图上搜”天堂” |
| [07:59] | and it says it’s a massage parlor in Koreatown. | 地图告诉我是韩国城的按摩院 |
| [08:02] | Oh, okay, I-I, uh… | 行了… |
| [08:04] | I think that’s enough screen time for today. | 今天玩平板电脑的时间够了 |
| [08:09] | I’ve been meaning to talk to you about | 我一直想和你说说 |
| [08:10] | what Miss Tina said about Heaven. | 缇娜阿姨说的天堂是怎么回事 |
| [08:12] | Okay. | 好 |
| [08:13] | It’s just that not everyone sees “heaven” | 其实每个人对”天堂”的看法 |
| [08:16] | the same way Miss Tina does. | 不一定都和缇娜阿姨一样 |
| [08:18] | – They don’t? – No. | -不一样吗 -不一样 |
| [08:20] | For example, some people believe | 比如 有人相信 |
| [08:22] | that heaven exists inside your heart. | 天堂在你心里 |
| [08:24] | And others believe that heaven is here on Earth | 还有人相信天堂在人世间 |
| [08:28] | and that our souls just keep coming back as a new being, | 而且我们的魂魄会回来投胎转世 |
| [08:30] | like a turtle or a horse. | 比如投胎成乌龟或者马 |
| [08:33] | Cool. I want to come back as a dung beetle. | 太棒了 我想投胎成屎壳郎 |
| [08:37] | What? | 什么 |
| [08:38] | Why would you want that? | 你为什么想投胎成那个东西 |
| [08:40] | It’s the world’s strongest insect. | 那是世界上最强壮的昆虫 |
| [08:42] | It can carry a thousand times its body weight. | 能举起比自身重一千倍的东西 |
| [08:45] | Yes. Of dung. | 对 但举的是屎啊 |
| [08:48] | I know! | 是啊 |
| [08:51] | Hey, Dad, I’m gonna be a dung beetle. | 爸爸 我要变成一只屎壳郎 |
| [08:53] | Oh, awesome, buddy. World’s strongest insect. | 太棒了 世界上最强壮的昆虫 |
| [08:57] | Hey, babe. | 宝贝 |
| [08:59] | Did you have any luck finding out about Mr. Benson? | 打听到什么有关班森先生的好事了吗 |
| [09:01] | No. I went door-to-door through the entire neighborhood | 没有 我挨家挨户在整个社区问了一圈 |
| [09:04] | and the only thing I heard about him | 打听到的唯一信息就是 |
| [09:06] | was that he was from New Orleans | 他是新奥尔良人 |
| [09:07] | and they wish he had died there. | 邻居都希望他死在那里 |
| [09:12] | Geez, he sounds like a real Aunt Phyllis. | 天呐 听起来就像菲利斯婶婶 |
| [09:15] | I know, but you– | 我知道 但是你 |
| [09:16] | I’m not giving up until I find his rhubarb pie. | 找不到他的”大黄派”我是不会放弃的 |
| [09:19] | And you will. | 你会找到的 |
| [09:20] | Because you can find the good in anybody. | 因为你总是能看到别人的优点 |
| [09:23] | Thank you. | 谢谢你 |
| [09:24] | But you really got to stop inviting | 但是你绝对不能再邀请 |
| [09:25] | the Jehovah’s Witnesses to stay for dinner. | 耶和华见证人来吃晚饭了 |
| [09:32] | Hey, Miss Kim. | 金小姐 |
| [09:33] | I knocked on your door earlier, but I guess you weren’t home. | 之前我去你家敲门了 你可能不在家 |
| [09:36] | Oh, no, I was there. | 不 我在家 |
| [09:38] | I saw you, Bobblehead Dave. | 我看到你了 大头戴夫 |
| [09:41] | I, well, you know, I was just wondering | 是这样 我想知道 |
| [09:43] | if you had any positive memories about Mr. Benson | 班森先生生前 你对他有没有 |
| [09:45] | – from before he died. – No. | -正面的回忆 -没有 |
| [09:47] | That old bastard. | 那个老混蛋 |
| [09:51] | Tina, how much did we pay for all this food? | 缇娜 这么多吃的花了我们多少钱 |
| [09:55] | About a half a bowling party, | 只花了保龄派对一半的钱 |
| [09:57] | not including the trophies you bought yourselves. | 还不包括你们给自己买的那些奖杯 |
| [10:01] | Well, I think it’s a waste of our money | 我觉得这既浪费我们的金钱 |
| [10:02] | and a waste of our hospitality. | 又浪费我们的好客之情 |
| [10:04] | And why nobody eating these bagels? | 还有为什么没人吃百吉饼 |
| [10:12] | They’re delicious. | 美味极了 |
| [10:15] | Oh, shoot, here comes Miss Kim. Hide me. | 要命 金小姐来了 挡住我 |
| [10:18] | – Too late. – No, no, no. | -太晚了 -不不不 |
| [10:20] | Oh, Marty. | 马蒂 |
| [10:22] | Aren’t you looking like a whole snack? | 你真是秀色可餐啊 |
| [10:27] | Don’t you mean Malcolm? | 您说的是马尔科姆吧 |
| [10:28] | Malcolm got too old. | 马尔科姆年老色衰了 |
| [10:32] | Well, little brother, do not break her heart. | 亲爱的弟弟 千万别伤害她的感情 |
| [10:35] | Or her hip. | 或者她的髋骨 |
| [10:38] | Marty, you know, I need someone | 马蒂 我需要一个 |
| [10:39] | young to keep up with me and… | 能满足我的年轻人… |
| [10:42] | you look like you’ve been working out. | 看来你最近在健身啊 |
| [10:46] | Well, you know, I have been taking the stairs at work. | 最近我都在单位爬楼梯 |
| [10:54] | You want to run, go outside. | 要跑出去跑 |
| [10:57] | And who left my door open? | 谁没关门啊 |
| [10:59] | I’m not trying to air condition the whole neighborhood. | 我可不想给整个社区制冷 |
| [11:03] | You don’t have the A/C on. | 你根本没开空调 |
| [11:04] | Well, they don’t know that. | 他们又不知道 |
| [11:07] | Hey, little boy, come on, get out of my chair. | 小鬼 快起来 别坐我的椅子 |
| [11:09] | You don’t have a job, | 你没有工作 |
| [11:10] | you haven’t earned the right to recline. | 所以没资格瘫在躺椅上 |
| [11:15] | Fine. Mean Mr. Butler. | 行吧 刻薄巴特勒先生 |
| [11:18] | W-What’d you call me? | 你管我叫什么 |
| [11:19] | He called you Mean Mr. Butler, you old bastard. | 他叫你刻薄巴特勒先生 你个老混蛋 |
| [11:31] | Hey, guys, I really need your help. | 伙计们 我急需你们的帮助 |
| [11:32] | It’s down to the wire and no one has said | 都到最后了 还是没有人 |
| [11:34] | a single nice thing about Mr. Benson. | 说过班森先生的好话 |
| [11:36] | Do you have anything I can work with? | 你们有什么好素材吗 |
| [11:38] | Well, there was that one summer he hired us | 有一年夏天他雇了我们 |
| [11:40] | to plant a vegetable garden. | 在菜园里种地 |
| [11:41] | Oh, right, we grew all those beautiful tomato plants. | 对 我们种出了漂亮的番茄植株 |
| [11:44] | That’s exactly what I’m looking for. | 我想听的就是这个 |
| [11:46] | Yeah, then he pelted us with them | 然后我们在人行道上骑车时 |
| [11:47] | when we rode our bikes on the sidewalk. | 他用那些番茄砸我们 |
| [11:52] | So far, that’s the one to beat. | 这是目前为止我听到最好的 |
| [11:58] | I just got called Mean Mr. Butler. | 刚刚有人叫我刻薄巴特勒先生 |
| [12:00] | What? By who? | 什么 谁叫的 |
| [12:01] | That little punk, Apple Head Fred. | 那个小屁孩 缺心眼的弗雷德 |
| [12:05] | What is he talking about? I’m not mean. | 他什么意思 我一点也不刻薄 |
| [12:07] | Well, Dad, just last week, you called the city | 这个嘛 爸 上周你刚给市政府打电话 |
| [12:11] | on Kayla Watkins’s lemonade stand | 举报了凯拉·沃特金斯的柠檬水摊铺 |
| [12:12] | because she didn’t have a “permit.” | 因为她没有”许可证” |
| [12:14] | I was looking out for the neighborhood. | 我是为社区着想 |
| [12:16] | That little hustler was cutting the sugar with Sweet’N Low. | 那个小骗子用代糖替换了糖 |
| [12:22] | Yeah, you’re a real pillar of the community, Pop. | 没错老爹 你是这个社区的支柱 |
| [12:24] | That’s what I keep saying. | 我一直都这么说 |
| [12:26] | Look, everybody around here loves me. | 这里的人都喜欢我 |
| [12:28] | Especially the kids. You know what? I’ll prove it. | 尤其是孩子们 这样吧 我来证明 |
| [12:30] | – Oh, no, no. No. No, no, no. – No, don’t. No. No… | -不不不不不不 -不不不 |
| [12:35] | Hey, little rascals. | 淘气鬼们 |
| [12:36] | Who wants cake? | 谁想吃蛋糕 |
| [12:41] | M-Mom… | 妈… |
| [12:44] | Berlene, you better toughen that little boy up, | 波琳 你最好让这个男孩坚强起来 |
| [12:47] | ’cause he’s gonna get beat up in high school. | 不然他这样上高中会被揍的 |
| [12:50] | So has Grover figured out the afterlife for himself yet? | 葛罗弗自己想明白来世的问题了吗 |
| [12:54] | Yep, and he wants to come back | 嗯 下辈子他想当 |
| [12:56] | as the world’s most disgusting bug. | 世界上最恶心的虫子 |
| [13:00] | You must be proud. | 你一定很骄傲 |
| [13:02] | You know what? I am. | 知道吗 我确实骄傲 |
| [13:04] | He’s a smart kid. He’ll figure it out. | 他是个聪明的孩子 他会想明白的 |
| [13:07] | Can I ask you a question? | 能问你一个问题吗 |
| [13:09] | Sure. | 当然 |
| [13:10] | Do you believe in heaven? | 你相信有天堂吗 |
| [13:12] | Yeah, I do. | 我相信 |
| [13:14] | But I mean, how can any of us be sure what it’s really like? | 但谁知道天堂是什么样子的呢 |
| [13:17] | It’s called faith, Gemma. | 这叫作信念 杰玛 |
| [13:19] | It’s like driving around with an expired license. | 就好比是拿着过期驾照开车 |
| [13:22] | You got to trust and believe that you won’t get caught. | 你得相信自己不会被抓到 |
| [13:26] | And so far, I haven’t. That’s Jesus. | 至今为止我都没被抓 这就是耶稣的力量 |
| [13:30] | Well, I guess the good thing is we all get to paint | 好的一面是 每个人心中 |
| [13:32] | our own picture of what heaven is. | 对天堂都有自己的理解 |
| [13:34] | Well, all I know is, in my heaven, | 我只知道 在我的天堂里 |
| [13:36] | everybody that I love is there. | 我所爱之人都在里面 |
| [13:38] | And they’re waiting for me at a Prince concert. | 他们正在普林斯的演唱会等我 |
| [13:42] | In my heaven, it’s the Backstreet Boys. | 我的天堂里是后街男孩 |
| [13:45] | And I can eat all the cheesecake I want | 而且我可以肆意吃芝士蛋糕 |
| [13:47] | and never gain a single pound. | 绝对不会发胖 |
| [13:49] | Well, Gemma Johnson, I hope to see you in my heaven. | 杰玛·强森 我等你来我的天堂 |
| [13:53] | I hope I see you in mine. | 我也等你来我的天堂 |
| [13:55] | And if you go first, will you save me a seat | 如果你先去 能帮我在普林斯的演唱会上 |
| [13:56] | – at your Prince concert? – Oh, most definitely. | -占个座吗 -当然没问题 |
| [13:59] | And if I go first, | 如果我先去 |
| [13:59] | I’ll save you a spot at the Backstreet Boys. | 就帮你在后街男孩的演唱会上占个座 |
| [14:03] | I’m good. | 不用了 |
| [14:07] | Hey, Kayla. | 凯拉 |
| [14:09] | – Nice seeing you… – Don’t even. | -很高兴见到你… -省省吧 |
| [14:10] | You shut down my lemonade stand. | 你让我的柠檬水摊铺歇业了 |
| [14:15] | Snitch. | 告密者 |
| [14:19] | Well, it’s people like you that make it hard | 就是你这种人让人难以 |
| [14:20] | to support black businesses. | 支持黑人的生意 |
| [14:26] | Well, okay, to answer your question, Grover, | 葛罗弗 回答你的问题 |
| [14:28] | as scientists, we learn about the law of conservation, | 作为科学家 我们会学习守恒定律 |
| [14:31] | which states that energy can neither be | 它阐明能量既不会凭空产生 |
| [14:32] | created nor destroyed. | 也不会凭空消失 |
| [14:35] | But if my mama asks, it’s what? | 但如果我妈问起来 该怎么说 |
| [14:37] | All Jesus all the time. | 说耶稣就完事了 |
| [14:41] | What do you think, Malcolm? | 你觉得呢 马尔科姆 |
| [14:43] | Well, there’s actually this great book… | 其实有本好书… |
| [14:44] | – I’m out. – Yeah, me, too. | -我撤了 -我也是 |
| [14:49] | So, so, what I’m saying is | 我想说的是 |
| [14:50] | that Mean Mr. Benson might just be the most repulsive, | 刻薄班森先生可能是我见过的 |
| [14:55] | vile, despicable human I’ve ever come across. | 最令人厌恶 最低级 最卑鄙的人 |
| [14:59] | And I hope he rots in hell. | 希望他在地狱永世不得超生 |
| [15:05] | Thanks, Reverend. | 谢谢你 牧师 |
| [15:09] | Hey, Dave. | 戴夫 |
| [15:10] | Thank God, man, look, | 感谢上帝 |
| [15:12] | I need to hear this. Please tell me, | 我很需要这个 请告诉我 |
| [15:14] | there’s something good in everyone, right? | 每个人都有好的一面 对吧 |
| [15:16] | I wish I could, but it’s a lie. | 我也想这么说 但这是谎言 |
| [15:19] | It is a damn, dirty lie. | 这是个肮脏的谎言 |
| [15:22] | No, no. Come on, that’s not true. | 不 不 拜托 不是的 |
| [15:24] | It– no, some people will only be remembered | 不 有些人只会因为 |
| [15:27] | for yelling at children and bossing people around | 对小孩嚷嚷 对别人指手画脚 |
| [15:30] | and spewing negativity up and down the streets. | 在街上传播消极情绪而被记住 |
| [15:34] | Well, when you say it like that, it sounds bad. | 你这么一说 听起来很糟糕啊 |
| [15:37] | Dave, if you’re gonna say something, say it now. | 戴夫 你有什么话就说吧 |
| [15:39] | These vultures got me down to one day of leftovers. | 这些人太能吃 剩下的只够我吃一天了 |
| [15:44] | You know what, Tina? | 你知道吗 缇娜 |
| [15:45] | I don’t think I’m going to, | 我不说了 |
| [15:47] | because for the first time in my life, | 因为这是我人生中第一次 |
| [15:49] | I don’t have anything good to say. | 没什么好话可说了 |
| [15:50] | No, Dave, do not talk like that. | 不 戴夫 别这么说 |
| [15:53] | Come on, man. | 拜托 |
| [15:55] | It’s like I tell everyone, | 就像我一直告诉大家的 |
| [15:57] | if you look hard enough, | 只要尽力去找 |
| [15:58] | you can find the good in everybody. | 就会发现每个人都有优点 |
| [16:01] | Dad, you have 100% never said that. | 爸 你百分之百没说过 |
| [16:07] | Uh, but you have said, | 但你说过 |
| [16:08] | – “I wish The Purge was a real thing.” – Yes. | -真有《人类清除计划》就好了 -没错 |
| [16:12] | Well, obviously, you just don’t know me. | 很显然 你们根本不了解我 |
| [16:15] | Just like you didn’t know Mr. Benson. | 就像你们不了解班森一样 |
| [16:17] | Yo, can I have everyone’s attention? | 请大家注意 |
| [16:19] | Come on. Everybody just gather around here. Come on, now. | 大家都围过来吧 |
| [16:23] | We are here to celebrate the life of a great man. | 我们聚集于此是为了庆祝一位伟人的一生 |
| [16:26] | Oh, wait. Someone else die? | 等等 还有别人死了吗 |
| [16:30] | No. I’m talking about Mr. Benson, | 不 我说的是班森先生 |
| [16:33] | who some of you refer to as “Mean Mr. Benson.” | 你们有些人说他是”刻薄的班森先生” |
| [16:37] | Shame on you. | 真丢人 |
| [16:40] | Because more than anything, | 最重要的是 |
| [16:42] | Mr. Benson was misunderstood. | 班森先生是被误会了 |
| [16:46] | I know a lot of you know him as the mean old grouch | 我知道很多人都觉得他是个自私的老家伙 |
| [16:50] | who stole your toys or insulted your Halloween costumes | 偷你的玩具 侮辱你的万圣节服装 |
| [16:54] | or yelled at you about cutting your grass. | 或是吼你让你割草 |
| [16:58] | Uh, yeah, because he did all those things. | 是的 因为他的确这么做了 |
| [17:01] | Yes, he did. | 是的 |
| [17:03] | But what you don’t know | 但你们不知道的是 |
| [17:05] | is the reason why he did those things | 他做这些事的原因 |
| [17:07] | is because he cared about this neighborhood. | 因为他关心这个社区 |
| [17:12] | Maybe he kept the toys | 也许他没收了 |
| [17:15] | that went into his yard | 丢进他院子的玩具 |
| [17:17] | to teach you the value of your belongings. | 是为了教你看好自己的东西 |
| [17:23] | And maybe he yelled at you | 也许他吼你 |
| [17:27] | about mowing your lawn | 让你割草 |
| [17:29] | so you could take pride in your homes. | 是为了让你能为自己的家而骄傲 |
| [17:33] | And just maybe | 也许 |
| [17:36] | he shut down a lemonade stand | 他关掉柠檬水摊铺 |
| [17:38] | to teach a young entrepreneur | 是为了教一个年轻的企业家 |
| [17:40] | that some people know the difference | 有些人知道 |
| [17:42] | between taste of sugar and Sweet’N Low. | 糖和代糖的区别 |
| [17:46] | Hey, yo, do you think Dad is talking about Mr. Benson | 你觉得老爸在说班森先生 |
| [17:49] | – or himself? – I think both. | -还是他自己 -都有吧 |
| [17:51] | He may have eaten one too many dumpster bagels. | 他可能吃了太多的过期百吉饼 |
| [17:56] | So basically… | 所以总之… |
| [18:00] | …what I’m saying is that before | 我想说的是 |
| [18:04] | you call someone mean, | 你说某人讨厌之前 |
| [18:07] | ask yourself | 请扪心自问 |
| [18:09] | is the more appropriate word “hero”? | “英雄”这个词是不是更合适呢 |
| [18:20] | He did it. He found the rhubarb pie. | 他做到了 他找到了大黄派 |
| [18:32] | Dave, black people don’t slow clap. | 戴夫 黑人不会慢悠悠地鼓掌 |
| [18:45] | Hey, what are you doing out here, little man? | 你在外面干什么 小家伙 |
| [18:47] | Not much. Just thinking about life and death. | 没干嘛 只是在思考生与死 |
| [18:53] | And how much cake I can eat before my parents catch me. | 还有在父母抓到我之前 我能吃多少蛋糕 |
| [19:00] | You know, you’re the only little kid around here | 这里的孩子只有你 |
| [19:03] | that doesn’t run away from me. | 不会躲着我 |
| [19:05] | Why would I run away? | 我为什么要躲 |
| [19:07] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
| [19:08] | Maybe because I’m Mean Mr. Butler. | 也许因为我是刻薄巴特勒先生 |
| [19:11] | I don’t think you’re mean. | 我觉得你不讨厌啊 |
| [19:14] | You just always think you’re right. | 你只是老觉得自己是对的 |
| [19:18] | Mm, for the record, that’s because I am. | 因为我就是对的啊 |
| [19:22] | Can I ask you a question? | 我能问你个问题吗 |
| [19:24] | Yeah, shoot. | 问吧 |
| [19:26] | Where do people go when they die? | 人死后会去哪里 |
| [19:28] | I’ve asked everyone, and they all say different stuff. | 每个人我都问了 但他们的回答都不一样 |
| [19:32] | You know, I’ve been thinking about that a lot today, Grover. | 我今天一直在想这件事 葛罗弗 |
| [19:36] | – You know what I’ve decided? – What? | -你知道我的结论是什么吗 -什么 |
| [19:39] | That maybe we shouldn’t worry so much about | 也许我们不用太担心 |
| [19:41] | where we go after we die, | 死后会去哪里 |
| [19:43] | as long as we’re good to each other when we’re here. | 活着的时候好好待人就够了 |
| [19:48] | Want a piece of my cake? | 吃块蛋糕吗 |
| [19:50] | Thanks, buddy, but I’m kind of filled up on bagels. | 谢了 小家伙 但我百吉饼吃太多了 |
| [20:00] | The band’s here! | 乐队来了 |
| [20:03] | You got a band? | 你还找了乐队 |
| [20:04] | Yes. Mr. Benson was from New Orleans, | 没错 班森先生来自新奥尔良 |
| [20:06] | so I thought we’d send him out in style. | 所以我想以他家乡的风俗来欢送他 |
| [20:18] | Well, Calvin Butler, that was a beautiful speech that you gave. | 卡尔文·巴特勒 你刚才的演讲很精彩 |
| [20:22] | Oh, thank you, baby. | 谢谢 宝贝 |
| [20:24] | Well, I found that, uh, page from the magazine in your chair. | 我在你椅子上找到那页杂志了 |
| [20:28] | So how about we keep this celebration going later | 我们过会用第十二招 |
| [20:31] | with a number 12? | 继续庆祝吧 |
| [20:33] | What’s a number 12? | 第十二招是什么 |
| [20:36] | It’s a number eight and a number four at the same time. | 就是第八招加上第四招 |
| [20:40] | Well, all right! | 嗨起来 |